All language subtitles for Sexual Beings - Lilly James, Penny Barber - PervTherapy
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Oh, come in.
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Hi, it's lovely to meet you. Come on in.
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Lily? Yes.
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And Franco.
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Yes, correct. Nice to meet you.
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Okay, wonderful. Please have a seat.
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Thank you so much for being here. My
name is Dr.
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Penny Barber.
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I've been working in therapy for quite a
while since I graduated.
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I started off in family therapy, and
then maybe like six months ago,
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I switched to human sexuality.
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I feel like it's a much better fit for
me personally. I just love helping
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in that way.
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What? Are you okay? I thought we were
here because...
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of grief therapy and because of you
mourning your father.
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Yes, that is what I had to tell her in
order to drag her here today with me. I
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had to tell the white lie, you know.
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Oh.
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Cat's out of the bag now.
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Okay. Yeah. I'm just not sure how you
can help.
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Okay. Well, that is a first for me.
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You know what? Since we have the session
book.
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I did have a background in family
therapy before I started this.
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Would you care to stay? Maybe we could
talk about that and the disparity and
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you both think you're here.
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Yes, that's fine.
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Yes, I'm willing to stay and talk. All
right.
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In that case, well, Lily, let's start
with you. Could you tell me a little bit
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about yourself?
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Well, I'm just a stay -at -home mom.
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Father did die about 18 months ago.
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Okay. I'm sorry to hear that. And so
I've just been
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taking care of him and everything.
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I go to church every weekend.
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But there's not much to say.
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How do you use anything?
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Gardening? Yeah.
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I like to go hiking and stuff like that,
and I do, like, a little gardening and
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stuff like that, but, you know.
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But that's your focus on the home right
now? Yes, yes.
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Okay, I see that.
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That sounds lovely. And, Franco, could
you tell me a little bit about yourself?
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Well, like she said, she's my stepmom,
wife of my father who had just passed,
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and, yeah, it's just us two now.
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I don't do much, really. I just go to
school, hang out with my friends, you
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know, that normal type stuff, I guess.
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All right. All right.
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Well,
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Lily, why were you told that you were
here today? Well, because I
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know he's still having trouble getting
over his father dying and everything.
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So I thought he wanted to come and, you
know.
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big thing going on about that, and I
thought that would be very helpful, you
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know, for a call to talk about that.
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Were there any specific things that you
thought that, of course, you wanted to
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mourn your father.
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Were there any particular behaviors that
you were concerned about, or does he
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seem like a red flag to you?
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No, I mean, he just seems, you know,
sad.
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Yeah. Okay.
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All right.
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And Franco, why don't you tell me...
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Why you asked your mom to come here
today?
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Well, ever since my father passed, I've
noticed more than once, a
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few times at this point, that usually
not in character for her to do, I've
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caught her staring at me in the shower a
few times.
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Oh.
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And I've been a weird one to confront
her about it, and I thought bringing her
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here will probably be a good way of
addressing that.
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Okay.
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So maybe there was an incident earlier
where you were having a look at Franco's
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shower. Is that true?
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Well, you know, it happened one time.
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I, you know, was walking by and I
noticed the bathroom door
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was open. He was in the shower.
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I kind of happened to look.
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But, you know, nothing happened. It was
just, it just
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happened. And I confessed and asked the
Lord for forgiveness when I was in
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church. And so, I mean, I'm totally
fine.
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I didn't see the harm in it.
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I confessed.
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She may have asked the Lord for
forgiveness, but she never once spoke to
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about it. You know, she knew I had
caught her doing it.
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Alright, what was that like? Like, what
happened when you got
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caught, Lily?
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What would you say, what was that
experience like? Yeah, I felt really bad
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it, you know. I knew I should not have
been doing that.
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Okay. So, I just, I felt really bad
about it, so.
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And Franka says you didn't talk to him
about that. Yeah, I'm embarrassed.
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Really? About even bringing it up?
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Okay, but Franco, you would have liked
to address it? Yes, absolutely.
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And I was embarrassed myself. That's why
I couldn't do it myself and why I
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decided to bring her here and trick her
because I didn't want to openly admit as
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to why.
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Is there anything?
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It seems like we had a little bit of a
disparity in that Lily says this
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once and Franco, you said this happened.
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Yeah. A few times.
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Maybe one time I let the door crack.
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Definitely a couple other times, like,
she had to open the door. I had to lock
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in it, but she had to open the door. So,
I guess I can take a little bit of the
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blame for that, but... Is this a
recurring issue, Lily?
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Oh, you know, uh... I just maybe
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peaked a little bit, but, you know, I...
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I didn't mean anything by it.
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I didn't mean anything by it. Okay.
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Did that seem like a genuine thought
when you heard that, in your opinion,
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expert opinion?
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Well, you know, maybe.
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Let's talk more about the underlying
issues of why this might have happened
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in the first place.
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Lily, have you been able to meet your
sexual need since the death of your
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husband?
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Honestly, no.
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No, I haven't.
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Have you explored any masturbation?
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Well, you know, I feel that's so private
and everything.
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You know, I just feel very uncomfortable
talking about that.
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Okay.
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I mean, I am a professional, and, you
know, clearly your son is concerned
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you. I can leave the room if it makes
him more comfortable.
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Oh.
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You don't have to do that.
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I just, you know, I just, do you often
have trouble discussing sexual matters
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home? Yes.
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We don't talk about that at all, no. At
all? No. Okay.
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Even after the passing of your father,
if you have questions, you don't have a
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source of information?
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No, I just keep to myself, yeah.
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Okay. All right. And can you tell me why
that is?
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What's the barrier here around
discussing sexuality issues at home?
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I just feel so uncomfortable.
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Is there a place that discomfort is
coming from? Is there something that you
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would... Being a good church
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-going woman, I just don't feel like
that I should be discussing those
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Do you feel like your religion is
precluding you from a
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frank discussion of erotic and sexual
matters?
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Yes.
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Okay. Well, you know, I do regularly
counsel Christians,
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you know, Christian families and
Christian people about, you know, their
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personal matters. And, you know, I'm
sure that if you do read in the Bible,
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everyone likes to quote song to song.
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You know, there certainly is a time and
a place, and there are certain...
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stories that are expected to go a
certain way. And, you know, I feel like
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is room for human sexuality within the
Bible. You know, there's certainly a lot
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of rules governing it.
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And so I do feel
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like I understand where those barriers
come from. I really do. You know, and
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where they're perceived and everything
like that.
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I do have some information on a...
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Christian human sexuality group therapy
that, you know, I might like to give you
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at the end of our meeting today.
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But until then, I would like to try
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a few things.
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Okay. Is that okay?
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Mm -hmm. All right.
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So when I was getting my certification
and earning my diploma,
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we did spend some time with
hypnotherapy.
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Which isn't a focus.
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I haven't done much of it since school.
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But I feel like in this very specific
situation, it might really help you to
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feel more open discussing these things.
And you might get more out of the
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session. It might be really freeing for
you.
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Hypnotherapy, like stuff you see in
movies and stuff.
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I would not say that the depictions of
hypnotherapy I've seen in movies have
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been accurate.
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But, yeah, you know, kind of, you know,
sure.
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I mean, I'm sure if you were to sit in
on our session, you know, and I started
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doing it, you would recognize it. I
would love to watch it.
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Are you curious?
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Well, the induction part of it is all
pretty simple.
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What I would do would be that I would
sort of...
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Get your attention and then sort of
break down these barriers that you're
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and talking about these things, not so
that you can do anything that you don't
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already want to do. You can't, like in
films, hypnotize someone to do something
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they don't want to do already.
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But you can sort of help them become
more their true self, like put them in a
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state of suggestibility to themselves.
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Okay. Which I think is the big
difference between what you see.
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In films and stuff, it's like, you know,
I probably couldn't make you, like, rob
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a bank.
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Right. Probably not going to work.
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But, you know, I've in the past seen
other therapists use it to, you know,
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help a father tell his daughter that he
really does love her despite, you know,
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something horrible that she's done that
he might not approve of or, you know,
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something like that. It's actually quite
helpful to get people to stop smoking,
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you know, things that they do want to do
anyway. But sometimes you just need to.
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reframe someone's thinking a little bit.
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Okay. I'm willing to try. This will
help.
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Yeah. If you're open to it, I would like
to give it a shot. Okay.
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All right.
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Well, wonderful.
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Franco, I am going to ask you to bear
with us. All right. Do your thing.
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More focus on your mom a little bit
right now.
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So all hypnosis is really self
-hypnosis.
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And it's a state that you've probably
experienced before, whether you've
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experienced something called highway
hypnosis, where, let's say, you're
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from one familiar place, work, driving
to another familiar place, home, and you
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just kind of do it on autopilot.
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Another example of a hypnosis that is
commonly experienced by people is, say,
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watching a movie. You know, you're
focused on it. You can enter a movie
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and you can sit down in the dark, be
completely focused on the film, and not
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even notice who is sitting right behind
you.
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All of your attention is focused on the
screen.
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So the first thing that I like to do is
to get your attention.
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And to do that, I actually think I would
like to use a necklace.
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I wasn't really prepared for
hypnotherapy session today, so I don't
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anything else.
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Okay. But if I could just have you
really focus right here on this jewel
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here. And I'm not going to swing it back
and forth. I'm just going to let it
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dangle right here. And I want you to
focus on your attention right there.
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As you're doing it, I want you to start
paying attention to your breath. Your
212
00:14:10,410 --> 00:14:12,770
mind can hold up to six thoughts at
once.
213
00:14:13,030 --> 00:14:17,130
And one of them is going to be taken up
by this pendant right here. And one of
214
00:14:17,130 --> 00:14:21,510
them is going to be taken up by your
breath. Just focus on breathing in and
215
00:14:21,650 --> 00:14:23,230
And let your body relax.
216
00:14:23,850 --> 00:14:27,710
You can move. You don't have to stay
totally still when you're being
217
00:14:27,990 --> 00:14:31,210
It's just like watching a movie. It's
just like watching television. You can
218
00:14:31,210 --> 00:14:34,670
feel yourself get comfortable. If you
have an itch, you can totally scratch
219
00:14:34,710 --> 00:14:38,290
If you want to take a deep breath or a
breath or something anyway, you can do
220
00:14:38,290 --> 00:14:41,470
that. You can take off your shoes. You
could probably get fully undressed, and
221
00:14:41,470 --> 00:14:47,670
it wouldn't matter. All you have to do
is look at the jaw and look upon your
222
00:14:47,670 --> 00:14:48,670
breath.
223
00:14:50,310 --> 00:14:52,470
All you have to do is focus right there.
224
00:14:53,370 --> 00:14:55,810
Do your best to focus right there and
get comfortable.
225
00:14:57,130 --> 00:15:03,770
Your body can move automatically and
easily, and it won't distract you at
226
00:15:03,850 --> 00:15:09,430
Anything else that you might hear,
sounds of cars outside, your breathing,
227
00:15:09,430 --> 00:15:14,590
breathing, your son's breathing, the
temperature in the room, everything is
228
00:15:14,590 --> 00:15:16,930
going to serve to augment this moment.
229
00:15:20,110 --> 00:15:23,750
and serve to augment your focus on the
stool.
230
00:15:28,030 --> 00:15:34,510
As you focus on the stool, I want you,
in your mind, on your own, I want you to
231
00:15:34,510 --> 00:15:39,150
start counting backwards from 10 down to
zero.
232
00:15:39,610 --> 00:15:45,310
When you get to zero, I want your eyes
to close, and I want you to sink into a
233
00:15:45,310 --> 00:15:47,370
deep hypnotic.
234
00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:51,420
Focus on the jaw.
235
00:15:52,220 --> 00:15:53,220
Working down.
236
00:15:53,840 --> 00:15:55,260
All the way in your head.
237
00:15:55,620 --> 00:15:56,620
Good.
238
00:15:57,060 --> 00:15:59,600
Excellent. What did you do?
239
00:15:59,980 --> 00:16:00,980
Oh, my God.
240
00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:02,080
All right.
241
00:16:03,660 --> 00:16:08,080
Really ease yourself in a relaxed state.
242
00:16:09,860 --> 00:16:13,720
I want you to feel all of your muscles
becoming completely relaxed.
243
00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:16,280
And again, you can move as you need to.
244
00:16:17,020 --> 00:16:21,490
Anything natural that you need to do in
your body is complete. Completely limp
245
00:16:21,490 --> 00:16:26,170
and comfortable as though it is filled
with warm liquid.
246
00:16:27,810 --> 00:16:29,770
Completely relaxed.
247
00:16:30,870 --> 00:16:33,410
Completely limp.
248
00:16:33,750 --> 00:16:34,750
Excellent.
249
00:16:35,610 --> 00:16:40,350
Now I want you to feel a state of
relaxation and acceptance take over your
250
00:16:40,350 --> 00:16:41,430
entire body.
251
00:16:42,140 --> 00:16:46,640
As soon as you know that you are
completely focused and that you are
252
00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:51,460
susceptible to suggestions from your own
subconscious mind, I want you to say,
253
00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:52,520
I'm convinced.
254
00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:55,300
I'm convinced.
255
00:16:55,920 --> 00:16:58,420
Excellent. That was so easy.
256
00:16:58,780 --> 00:17:01,480
That was the easiest thing in the world,
just focusing.
257
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:08,140
Now, really, you are a sexual being.
258
00:17:08,859 --> 00:17:10,240
And that's okay.
259
00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:16,780
You have sexual need, and that's
completely natural.
260
00:17:18,140 --> 00:17:22,720
Lord God created you as a thankful
creature, and he would not have given
261
00:17:22,720 --> 00:17:28,079
these wonderful, beautiful feelings if
you were not meant to explore them.
262
00:17:28,740 --> 00:17:33,460
I don't want you to ever question
anything that occurs to you naturally. I
263
00:17:33,460 --> 00:17:38,500
you to feel completely at ease with
yourself as a sexual woman and a sexual
264
00:17:38,500 --> 00:17:39,500
creature.
265
00:17:40,090 --> 00:17:45,590
I want you to feel open about expressing
that sexuality and comfortable
266
00:17:45,590 --> 00:17:47,010
expressing that sexuality.
267
00:17:47,670 --> 00:17:52,610
As you feel comfortable and relaxed
right now, that's how I want you to feel
268
00:17:52,610 --> 00:17:56,710
when you are expressing sex and sexual.
269
00:17:57,150 --> 00:18:01,090
I want you to remember the state that
you're in right now, where you are
270
00:18:01,090 --> 00:18:06,490
and open, and I want you to be able to
return to it at the snap of my fingers.
271
00:18:07,150 --> 00:18:10,670
I want you to know that this office is a
safe place.
272
00:18:11,070 --> 00:18:15,790
You can discuss anything here within
these four white walls.
273
00:18:16,290 --> 00:18:20,310
It is a safe space where you can explore
your thoughts, your feelings, your
274
00:18:20,310 --> 00:18:25,630
sexuality. And it's completely non
-judgmental. And it's completely
275
00:18:25,930 --> 00:18:29,230
And it's going to feel good to do so.
276
00:18:29,450 --> 00:18:32,530
It's going to feel good to explore your
sexuality.
277
00:18:33,660 --> 00:18:37,920
I'm going to keep talking to you. Once
you understand that it is completely
278
00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:42,940
for you to explore your sexuality, and
that the snapping of my fingers gives
279
00:18:42,940 --> 00:18:46,060
permission to do so, I want you to say,
I'm convinced.
280
00:18:46,860 --> 00:18:49,140
It's okay for you to explore your
sexuality.
281
00:18:49,520 --> 00:18:51,940
It's okay for you to explore your
sexuality. I'm convinced.
282
00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:55,500
Good girl. That's a wonderful memory.
283
00:18:55,780 --> 00:18:59,960
It's going to feel so good to explore
your sexuality here in this office.
284
00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:05,820
Now I am going to count back up from 0
to 10, and when I get to 10, I am going
285
00:19:05,820 --> 00:19:09,840
to snap my fingers. You are going to be
fully awake, and you are going to feel
286
00:19:09,840 --> 00:19:16,300
focused and refreshed and eager to have
an open conversation with me about sex.
287
00:19:16,820 --> 00:19:23,240
0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5,
288
00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:29,160
6, 7, 8, 9, 10.
289
00:19:30,700 --> 00:19:32,560
Good. Hi.
290
00:19:32,820 --> 00:19:33,820
How are you feeling?
291
00:19:34,220 --> 00:19:35,039
I'm good.
292
00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:36,040
You feeling okay?
293
00:19:36,380 --> 00:19:38,460
Yes. All right. Good.
294
00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:39,840
That's wonderful.
295
00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:46,300
Okay. Let's continue our session.
296
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:48,960
I'm so glad that you were willing to do
that.
297
00:19:49,360 --> 00:19:50,360
Yeah.
298
00:19:50,460 --> 00:19:51,460
I'm feeling great.
299
00:19:51,700 --> 00:19:52,700
Oh, yeah?
300
00:19:53,240 --> 00:19:55,040
You feeling relaxed?
301
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:56,320
Yeah. Okay.
302
00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:58,080
All right. Awesome.
303
00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:03,720
So, I thought we could revisit a few
topics that we had discussed.
304
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:07,260
Alright, yeah, let's go for it.
305
00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:15,400
So, Franco, can you tell me, in
306
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:21,680
plain English, without censoring
yourself at all, what you think,
307
00:20:21,820 --> 00:20:28,400
if anything, what you think your mom
needs to be happy?
308
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:36,420
After what I just saw, um, in plain
English, I said, uh, she needs to be,
309
00:20:36,460 --> 00:20:41,980
she needs to be fucked. She needs to be
pleasured. Um, obviously that's been,
310
00:20:41,980 --> 00:20:46,100
uh, gone since my dad's passing. And
that's exactly.
311
00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:48,740
Okay. I think.
312
00:20:49,060 --> 00:20:52,900
Uh, Lily, how do you feel about that
very honest statement?
313
00:20:55,180 --> 00:20:56,960
Well, I agree.
314
00:20:57,220 --> 00:20:58,520
It's been a long time.
315
00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:01,880
Yeah. Would you say that's something
that's been missing from your life?
316
00:21:02,180 --> 00:21:03,700
Yes, I would say so.
317
00:21:04,100 --> 00:21:05,100
Okay.
318
00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:10,880
Can I ask you, have what, if anything,
have you been doing to take care of your
319
00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:11,880
own sexual need?
320
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:13,920
No, I haven't been.
321
00:21:14,300 --> 00:21:18,340
Because I feel like, you know, I
shouldn't be doing that.
322
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:21,580
I'm afraid it's a sin.
323
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:23,200
Okay.
324
00:21:24,120 --> 00:21:28,380
You know, there... Like so many things
in the Bible, there are different
325
00:21:28,380 --> 00:21:30,680
interpretations of it.
326
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:37,000
But I do have to ask you, whom do you
think it's hurting for you to feel
327
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:38,100
pleasure?
328
00:21:41,140 --> 00:21:42,620
I mean,
329
00:21:44,060 --> 00:21:47,980
really no one, I guess. But I just feel
like it's not the right thing to do.
330
00:21:49,060 --> 00:21:53,760
There's still that restraint there, even
though. But let's agree on that. Let's
331
00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:54,760
say...
332
00:21:55,010 --> 00:22:00,570
that we can say that it is not hurting
anybody if Lily were to masturbate.
333
00:22:00,770 --> 00:22:03,510
That's probably an accurate statement,
right? Okay.
334
00:22:03,770 --> 00:22:05,750
It's probably not going to burn down a
hospital. Right.
335
00:22:06,150 --> 00:22:07,390
Most likely. Right.
336
00:22:09,490 --> 00:22:13,070
How much should she be masturbating, in
your professional opinion?
337
00:22:13,630 --> 00:22:15,970
Well, you know, as much as she wants to.
338
00:22:16,650 --> 00:22:19,870
You know, and that varies for people.
There's, you know, different statistics
339
00:22:19,870 --> 00:22:23,750
that come out every few years. Somebody
does a survey where they're like, oh,
340
00:22:23,870 --> 00:22:29,150
how much do people, and the only
consistency we find is generally that
341
00:22:29,150 --> 00:22:30,790
do it a little bit less than men.
342
00:22:30,990 --> 00:22:32,530
But not as much as you would think.
343
00:22:33,170 --> 00:22:36,230
Or at least not as much as I would have
thought in my 20s.
344
00:22:37,810 --> 00:22:40,270
But okay, so you haven't really been
masturbating.
345
00:22:40,550 --> 00:22:44,290
When is the last time that you had an
orgasm?
346
00:22:47,660 --> 00:22:50,460
Probably way before his father.
347
00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:54,460
Oh, and you said that was... 18 months
ago.
348
00:22:54,820 --> 00:22:56,660
18 months ago that he passed away.
349
00:22:57,100 --> 00:22:58,240
So that's a while.
350
00:22:58,500 --> 00:22:59,500
Yeah.
351
00:23:01,120 --> 00:23:05,240
What is the longest in your adult life
that you have gone without climaxing?
352
00:23:08,420 --> 00:23:11,040
Probably six months.
353
00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:19,280
Okay, so the 18 months since you died is
the longest stretch, but a previous six
354
00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:24,540
-month period, that's kind of a lot. You
know, that seems like a lot to me.
355
00:23:25,940 --> 00:23:26,940
All right.
356
00:23:28,460 --> 00:23:30,540
Okay, let's try something else.
357
00:23:32,780 --> 00:23:37,460
Thank you very much, by the way, for
sharing this information with me. I know
358
00:23:37,460 --> 00:23:40,440
that it can be difficult to do that, but
I do want it to start to feel really
359
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:41,500
good for you to share.
360
00:23:42,699 --> 00:23:46,620
Franco, let's have you stand here, and
Lily, let's have you stand right there.
361
00:23:47,100 --> 00:23:48,100
Okay.
362
00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:49,480
Okay.
363
00:23:50,980 --> 00:23:55,720
So, Lily, I want you to take a deep
look. May I touch you, Franco?
364
00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:57,280
Yes.
365
00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:01,720
Take a deep look into your son's eyes.
366
00:24:03,500 --> 00:24:09,540
I want you both to sort of, like, start
breathing deeply into something that can
367
00:24:09,540 --> 00:24:10,540
really...
368
00:24:10,740 --> 00:24:13,720
make a connection between people is when
they kind of think up their breath.
369
00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:17,020
Okay. So what I would like you to do is
I would like to take your hand, Franco,
370
00:24:17,160 --> 00:24:18,880
and can I put this hand on your chest
right here? Okay.
371
00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:22,740
Right there, and same thing. Can I put
your hand right here on his chest?
372
00:24:23,120 --> 00:24:27,000
Okay. And I want you to just keep
breathing deeply, and I want you looking
373
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:31,180
each other's eyes, and I want you to
think up as much as you can.
374
00:24:32,940 --> 00:24:39,360
So, Lily, there have been some instances
with you peeping on Franco.
375
00:24:40,639 --> 00:24:42,820
Thanks, Franco. How did that make you
feel?
376
00:24:44,620 --> 00:24:45,820
Was it a bad feeling?
377
00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:48,880
No, I wouldn't say it was a bad feeling.
378
00:24:49,740 --> 00:24:55,100
I would say the feeling, I don't know
how quite to explain.
379
00:24:55,780 --> 00:24:57,080
Not good, not bad.
380
00:24:59,340 --> 00:25:01,260
Not a good feeling, not a bad feeling.
381
00:25:01,460 --> 00:25:05,740
Yeah. That's okay. You know, it's okay
if you can't be back lately or you're
382
00:25:05,740 --> 00:25:09,080
thinking, so long as you're being open,
I would say it's more important to be
383
00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:14,000
open. Oh, yeah, like, if I wasn't trying
to be open, I would say it was bad
384
00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:18,220
right away, but her being my stepmom and
everything, like, yeah, I was like,
385
00:25:18,300 --> 00:25:23,180
this should feel bad, but that's where
the confusion comes in, like, oh, why
386
00:25:23,180 --> 00:25:27,300
don't I feel bad about it? Okay. I find
it intriguing.
387
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:29,920
Okay. A way to put it.
388
00:25:30,700 --> 00:25:33,500
That's a great way to put it. That's
really beautiful.
389
00:25:33,780 --> 00:25:36,640
Do you want me to thank yourself for
sharing with you like that? Yeah.
390
00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:39,380
That was really wonderful. Thank you.
391
00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:46,320
And Lily, can you please tell me how it
felt to
392
00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:49,280
see Franco naked?
393
00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:54,500
Well, at first it was a little strange.
394
00:25:54,720 --> 00:26:01,220
Okay. But then I, I don't know, I just
actually kind of
395
00:26:01,220 --> 00:26:04,820
turned on by it. Okay.
396
00:26:06,670 --> 00:26:09,250
All right. How does that feel to talk
about that right now?
397
00:26:10,450 --> 00:26:15,670
It's a little difficult, but I feel like
I can and that I'm ready to talk about
398
00:26:15,670 --> 00:26:17,670
it. You're feeling a little more open?
399
00:26:17,990 --> 00:26:18,990
Yes.
400
00:26:19,610 --> 00:26:23,570
Yeah, he tends to remind me of his
father.
401
00:26:24,370 --> 00:26:25,370
Okay.
402
00:26:25,970 --> 00:26:32,270
I can see that. I can see you feeling
those kind of feelings and rejecting a
403
00:26:32,270 --> 00:26:33,270
little bit.
404
00:26:33,330 --> 00:26:34,330
Completely normal.
405
00:26:35,310 --> 00:26:38,230
It's not something we talk about very
much, but it's very common.
406
00:26:41,370 --> 00:26:48,350
Franco, you said that it would help your
mom if she were to have
407
00:26:48,350 --> 00:26:49,350
sex.
408
00:26:49,770 --> 00:26:50,770
Yes. Right?
409
00:26:52,050 --> 00:26:55,830
Okay. Do you feel like that's something
that she needs? How do you feel like her
410
00:26:55,830 --> 00:26:58,410
behavior would change if she was having
sex?
411
00:27:00,130 --> 00:27:03,030
Would she be... Probably more...
412
00:27:03,630 --> 00:27:07,930
And better moods and more open, like she
is now.
413
00:27:08,470 --> 00:27:10,510
Happier and more open, more relaxed,
maybe?
414
00:27:10,770 --> 00:27:12,110
Yes. Would that be accurate? Okay.
415
00:27:13,710 --> 00:27:17,330
All right, and that sounds good to you,
to have a mom around the house who is
416
00:27:17,330 --> 00:27:21,530
happy and relaxed and more open.
417
00:27:21,790 --> 00:27:22,870
That sounds better?
418
00:27:23,190 --> 00:27:24,450
Yes. Okay.
419
00:27:25,670 --> 00:27:32,530
And you both said that it didn't feel
bad when Lily
420
00:27:32,530 --> 00:27:37,020
was... Taking a peek, as it were,
meaning a little bit of a voyeur.
421
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:41,280
But it was a negative experience.
422
00:27:42,340 --> 00:27:49,340
So I can understand how there would be a
lot of outside influence for telling
423
00:27:49,340 --> 00:27:50,600
me that it's a negative experience.
424
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:57,100
But if you're not feeling it that way,
then I personally don't think that
425
00:27:57,100 --> 00:28:01,460
there's a lot to be gained from
wallowing in those negative feelings,
426
00:28:02,860 --> 00:28:07,180
So, Franco, I was wondering if you would
be willing to do something for me right
427
00:28:07,180 --> 00:28:08,900
now. And what is that?
428
00:28:10,140 --> 00:28:15,140
Well, I was wondering if you would maybe
be willing to let your mom sort of
429
00:28:15,140 --> 00:28:19,860
explore you more fully here right now.
430
00:28:21,580 --> 00:28:25,180
And what do you mean by explore? Like,
you want me to take my clothes off right
431
00:28:25,180 --> 00:28:29,540
now? Very specifically, yes. I was going
to start by asking you to take your
432
00:28:29,540 --> 00:28:31,120
clothes off. That was going to be my
step one.
433
00:28:31,380 --> 00:28:32,380
All right.
434
00:28:33,500 --> 00:28:40,220
And I know it can feel a little strange,
but I do think it can be very helpful.
435
00:28:40,980 --> 00:28:44,860
Well, I've seen what you've done so far,
and you work your magic, so... Okay,
436
00:28:44,860 --> 00:28:45,860
thank you.
437
00:28:47,740 --> 00:28:51,380
Whatever you say, yeah, I'm in. Willing
to take a risk? Yes.
438
00:28:51,640 --> 00:28:53,600
Willing to play the game? Okay, thank
you.
439
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:56,740
I appreciate your confidence in my
ability.
440
00:28:58,820 --> 00:29:01,160
Lily, would that be okay? Are you
interested?
441
00:29:05,399 --> 00:29:11,540
It definitely feels strange, but I guess
if you think it will help.
442
00:29:11,740 --> 00:29:15,260
I do think that it will help, and
strange doesn't have to feel bad. So, of
443
00:29:15,260 --> 00:29:17,520
course, if it does feel bad, you can say
so.
444
00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:20,200
And if it feels strange, you can
certainly say so.
445
00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:22,140
It's just all about communication.
446
00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:24,120
Okay?
447
00:29:24,850 --> 00:29:29,270
Why don't you, Lily, tell Franco exactly
what you want him to do? I want you to
448
00:29:29,270 --> 00:29:33,090
take your shirt off. I want you to take
your shoes off. I want you to let me
449
00:29:33,090 --> 00:29:35,390
touch your chest. You know, anything
like that.
450
00:29:36,210 --> 00:29:38,050
Okay. Can you take that power?
451
00:29:39,150 --> 00:29:40,150
Sure.
452
00:29:40,290 --> 00:29:41,290
Okay,
453
00:29:41,430 --> 00:29:44,030
Franco. I want you to take your shirt
off.
454
00:29:45,870 --> 00:29:46,870
Okay.
455
00:30:02,649 --> 00:30:05,390
And it's all on your camera right here?
456
00:30:05,650 --> 00:30:08,470
Oh, yeah. I just use it to take notes in
my sessions.
457
00:30:09,450 --> 00:30:11,550
So it's okay for it to stay on?
458
00:30:11,950 --> 00:30:17,010
Oh, yeah. I mean, like, it'll be in my
files for me, you know.
459
00:30:17,790 --> 00:30:21,910
No one else will see it. No, I don't
generally allow people into my medical
460
00:30:21,910 --> 00:30:23,130
files. Okay.
461
00:30:23,350 --> 00:30:25,090
Oh, very private. Making sure.
462
00:30:25,350 --> 00:30:26,350
Mm -hmm.
463
00:31:30,159 --> 00:31:32,040
How long since you've been touched?
464
00:31:33,180 --> 00:31:34,660
That's been a long time too.
465
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:44,840
You having a thought there, Franco?
466
00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:49,660
Whatever the doctor suggests.
467
00:31:51,020 --> 00:31:56,780
I always suggest open and honest
communication and clear expression of
468
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:05,380
Seeing as she's seen me naked before, I
think she should return the favor.
469
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:06,920
Good for her.
470
00:32:07,220 --> 00:32:08,220
Okay.
471
00:32:23,020 --> 00:32:25,340
That's some very beautiful lingerie for
no one to see it.
472
00:32:27,880 --> 00:32:28,880
Why, thank you.
473
00:32:32,840 --> 00:32:33,840
May I?
474
00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:34,920
Sure.
475
00:32:36,180 --> 00:32:39,340
It's always good to ask. You never know.
The answer might be yes.
476
00:32:39,540 --> 00:32:41,560
The answer's no. That's okay, too.
477
00:32:51,340 --> 00:32:55,240
Are you okay for you to explore each
other as long as you feel you're
478
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:56,240
it?
479
00:32:57,040 --> 00:33:00,640
Without having to worry about any
judgment coming from anywhere else?
480
00:33:05,320 --> 00:33:11,660
Don't want all of these repressions to
build up into resentments or
481
00:33:11,660 --> 00:33:12,880
neuroses.
482
00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:17,040
Kind of get it all out.
483
00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:20,080
Thank you.
484
00:33:44,670 --> 00:33:46,930
You're being so affectionate, Lily.
485
00:33:47,730 --> 00:33:50,350
I love it. I love seeing you enjoy
yourself.
486
00:33:56,940 --> 00:34:01,460
I'm so nervous when you first got here.
I know. I feel so much better now.
487
00:34:03,220 --> 00:34:04,220
Mm -hmm.
488
00:34:16,639 --> 00:34:21,219
To your communicating, just kind of
about words, just physically enjoying
489
00:34:21,219 --> 00:34:23,760
yourself, connecting.
490
00:34:35,440 --> 00:34:36,600
It's definitely been a long time.
491
00:34:43,280 --> 00:34:47,520
But I'm glad we're able to do that.
492
00:34:48,300 --> 00:34:49,659
Did you want to take these off?
493
00:34:56,260 --> 00:34:58,660
Look at what a big step you've made,
Lily.
494
00:34:58,960 --> 00:34:59,859
I know.
495
00:34:59,860 --> 00:35:02,980
I feel like I've come a long way
already.
496
00:35:05,070 --> 00:35:06,130
Completely naked.
497
00:35:06,530 --> 00:35:08,030
You seem very relaxed.
498
00:35:08,970 --> 00:35:10,230
Very calm.
499
00:35:10,810 --> 00:35:12,970
I think you really helped me.
500
00:35:13,890 --> 00:35:15,810
I try.
501
00:35:19,410 --> 00:35:22,190
I feel definitely more relaxed now.
502
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:30,500
exploring each other so openly.
503
00:35:30,820 --> 00:35:33,760
Do you mind if I kind of come in there
and kind of like facilitate a little
504
00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:35,500
Sure. Come on.
505
00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:42,118
That's good.
506
00:35:42,120 --> 00:35:43,420
I like to see more touching.
507
00:35:45,500 --> 00:35:47,640
Eye contact is always nice.
508
00:35:48,620 --> 00:35:49,620
That's good.
509
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:52,960
That's right.
510
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:56,320
Kissing, exploring.
511
00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:00,360
Wonderful.
512
00:36:04,460 --> 00:36:05,460
Vocalizing.
513
00:36:06,360 --> 00:36:07,780
Leaning feeling.
514
00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:18,100
And Franco, can you tell your mother how
beautiful she is?
515
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:19,440
This is okay.
516
00:36:20,060 --> 00:36:21,060
She's gorgeous.
517
00:36:21,480 --> 00:36:23,300
And this is exactly what she needs.
518
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:28,600
Large breath.
519
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:32,700
And this tiny little wave, which is very
full hip.
520
00:36:37,420 --> 00:36:42,020
Really, it's okay for you two to talk
about how your son looks.
521
00:36:42,860 --> 00:36:46,020
I imagine that these pictorials didn't
just happen.
522
00:37:02,410 --> 00:37:03,410
You're so handsome.
523
00:37:06,070 --> 00:37:09,750
I like how you two are using your hands
to explore each other.
524
00:37:10,030 --> 00:37:11,810
Your mouth a little bit.
525
00:37:12,350 --> 00:37:13,930
Franco's using his mouth a little bit.
526
00:37:15,630 --> 00:37:18,230
He needs to have a little bit more of an
oral fixation.
527
00:37:24,510 --> 00:37:25,810
Maybe you should just kind of go.
528
00:37:26,090 --> 00:37:30,010
That whatever you want to experience,
he's doing such a beautiful job in
529
00:37:30,010 --> 00:37:32,330
communicating with your eyes and your
body.
530
00:37:32,990 --> 00:37:34,830
It's really gorgeous to watch.
531
00:38:20,109 --> 00:38:22,310
It's quiet interaction.
532
00:38:28,730 --> 00:38:29,770
Enjoying yourself?
533
00:38:30,280 --> 00:38:31,280
I am. Yeah.
534
00:38:33,380 --> 00:38:34,420
Are you guys?
535
00:38:35,860 --> 00:38:38,000
I'm having, I mean, you know, my
calling.
536
00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:41,500
So I'm having a wonderful time.
537
00:38:41,860 --> 00:38:46,860
It's always nice to have a successful
session and seeing two people really
538
00:38:46,860 --> 00:38:48,220
each other and come together.
539
00:38:49,020 --> 00:38:55,060
You know, because they're coming
together as a mother and son
540
00:38:55,060 --> 00:38:58,420
or as partners in another way.
541
00:39:30,870 --> 00:39:32,730
It looks like I feel great.
542
00:39:33,810 --> 00:39:39,170
I feel more comfortable with you. You
got more on our level with.
543
00:39:39,530 --> 00:39:41,310
Clothing -wise. Okay.
544
00:39:41,530 --> 00:39:43,190
Dr. Fiber, would you please?
545
00:39:43,930 --> 00:39:45,630
Would you please be naked?
546
00:39:45,950 --> 00:39:49,870
Yes. I think that I can accommodate that
request.
547
00:39:50,370 --> 00:39:51,370
I think that's doable.
548
00:39:54,590 --> 00:39:56,690
I do enjoy facilitating.
549
00:40:44,880 --> 00:40:46,320
Oh my God.
550
00:40:47,020 --> 00:40:48,360
That feels so good.
551
00:41:12,430 --> 00:41:16,370
If somebody had told you that your mom
would be doing this last week, you
552
00:41:16,370 --> 00:41:18,410
probably would have believed it.
553
00:41:19,650 --> 00:41:20,650
Never.
554
00:41:23,730 --> 00:41:26,710
I never would have imagined I would be
doing this.
555
00:41:29,570 --> 00:41:32,990
I'm pretty sure that it's okay for you
to explore it.
556
00:41:35,310 --> 00:41:37,790
There will be no negative consequences.
557
00:41:38,050 --> 00:41:40,650
I really think that you can just kind of
let go of guilt.
558
00:41:43,600 --> 00:41:45,440
You're not hurting anybody.
559
00:41:45,740 --> 00:41:47,260
In fact, probably quite the opposite.
560
00:42:13,900 --> 00:42:17,500
I was going to ask you, Lily, if there
were any specific parts of them that you
561
00:42:17,500 --> 00:42:21,140
wanted to explore, but it seems like you
found one.
562
00:42:22,560 --> 00:42:24,580
Yeah. You seem very focused.
563
00:42:27,760 --> 00:42:31,620
It looks like you're really enjoying
yourself down there, Lily.
564
00:42:31,980 --> 00:42:34,800
Is that a good place to be? Mm -hmm.
565
00:42:37,980 --> 00:42:40,440
You know what I think?
566
00:42:40,740 --> 00:42:41,669
Mm -hmm.
567
00:42:41,670 --> 00:42:48,150
I think that I want you to look right
here, and the church lady
568
00:42:48,150 --> 00:42:55,090
has gone to church, Lily, and all that's
left in her place, all those built -up
569
00:42:55,090 --> 00:43:01,990
wants and desires, all that sexual
craving, and I want it all
570
00:43:01,990 --> 00:43:08,590
to come out in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
571
00:43:32,070 --> 00:43:34,590
Is that an invitation?
572
00:43:35,390 --> 00:43:36,690
Oh yes.
573
00:43:44,710 --> 00:43:46,170
Oh, yeah.
574
00:43:47,350 --> 00:43:49,870
Oh, yeah.
575
00:43:50,410 --> 00:43:51,410
Oh,
576
00:43:52,310 --> 00:43:53,310
yeah. Oh,
577
00:43:57,630 --> 00:43:58,630
yeah.
578
00:43:58,890 --> 00:43:59,930
Oh,
579
00:44:03,070 --> 00:44:04,070
yeah.
580
00:44:36,100 --> 00:44:38,560
She did just need to get fucked.
581
00:45:10,080 --> 00:45:12,880
Yeah, honestly
582
00:45:13,870 --> 00:45:14,870
That was amazing.
583
00:45:16,570 --> 00:45:17,930
That was fun.
584
00:45:18,690 --> 00:45:21,130
Yeah. Do you want to come over here?
585
00:45:21,490 --> 00:45:22,490
I mean, I don't want to impose.
586
00:45:23,030 --> 00:45:25,010
Okay. That's fine.
587
00:45:25,470 --> 00:45:27,050
Do you want to share a little bit?
588
00:45:31,530 --> 00:45:37,550
So gorgeous.
589
00:45:41,370 --> 00:45:42,730
So steady.
590
00:45:43,560 --> 00:45:44,780
Oh, that's so hot.
591
00:45:47,260 --> 00:45:50,220
Look at that just sticking out.
592
00:45:50,820 --> 00:45:53,880
I'm so enlarged.
593
00:45:55,720 --> 00:45:57,140
Mm -hmm.
594
00:45:58,220 --> 00:45:59,400
Mm -hmm.
595
00:46:04,560 --> 00:46:05,580
Cut it.
596
00:46:05,780 --> 00:46:06,780
Oh, yeah.
597
00:46:08,360 --> 00:46:10,500
There it is. Oh, wow.
598
00:46:12,680 --> 00:46:13,680
Oh my god.
599
00:46:16,300 --> 00:46:18,680
Oh wow.
600
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:19,920
Oh my god.
601
00:46:22,620 --> 00:46:25,020
You just kind of took that. That's a big
dick.
602
00:46:26,460 --> 00:46:27,720
Oh my god.
603
00:46:56,759 --> 00:46:57,759
Thank you.
604
00:47:30,540 --> 00:47:32,280
Thank you.
605
00:50:28,160 --> 00:50:29,800
That was weird.
606
00:51:00,990 --> 00:51:02,090
It's so good.
607
00:51:49,000 --> 00:51:50,000
Thank you for watching.
608
00:51:57,830 --> 00:51:58,990
That's so good.
609
00:52:55,120 --> 00:52:57,820
Oh, it's right there. It's right on the
clitoris. Oh my god.
610
00:53:12,220 --> 00:53:14,720
Oh my
611
00:53:14,720 --> 00:53:20,060
god!
612
00:53:21,040 --> 00:53:26,180
Oh god, yeah.
613
00:53:29,980 --> 00:53:30,980
mm -hmm
614
00:54:02,419 --> 00:54:08,580
You have a
615
00:54:08,580 --> 00:54:13,280
very talented son. Apparently I do.
616
00:54:21,480 --> 00:54:26,220
I'm sorry.
617
00:54:48,779 --> 00:54:51,580
um um
618
00:55:33,070 --> 00:55:34,070
You were curious.
619
00:55:35,110 --> 00:55:38,270
That is a lot of that. Oh, my God.
620
00:55:44,450 --> 00:55:46,110
Nice. Yes.
621
00:55:47,290 --> 00:55:48,290
It's beautiful.
622
00:55:49,230 --> 00:55:50,230
It's beautiful.
623
00:56:36,440 --> 00:56:38,420
Thank you.
624
00:57:10,799 --> 00:57:11,800
Oh God, wow.
625
00:57:15,860 --> 00:57:17,640
Oh my God.
626
00:58:22,510 --> 00:58:24,690
You're ready to pick a question.
627
00:58:26,230 --> 00:58:27,430
Better than I imagined.
628
00:59:56,400 --> 00:59:59,760
I love watching you get what you need.
629
01:00:01,000 --> 01:00:03,100
So fulfilling as a therapist.
630
01:00:05,140 --> 01:00:07,320
Just to see a client get what she needs.
631
01:00:09,930 --> 01:00:10,930
Come into your room.
632
01:01:02,680 --> 01:01:04,760
You're happy?
633
01:01:06,220 --> 01:01:08,160
I'm happy
634
01:01:13,100 --> 01:01:14,100
I'm going to eat this.
635
01:01:14,880 --> 01:01:15,880
Oh, yeah.
636
01:01:18,200 --> 01:01:19,200
Oh, yeah.
637
01:01:24,700 --> 01:01:31,640
Oh, that's
638
01:01:31,640 --> 01:01:32,880
right. Oh, that's beautiful.
639
01:01:33,960 --> 01:01:35,420
So gorgeous.
640
01:03:20,780 --> 01:03:21,780
I'll see you together.
641
01:03:27,000 --> 01:03:30,480
Really? I have one more question. Yeah?
642
01:03:31,600 --> 01:03:36,880
Where do you think would be a good
place?
643
01:03:39,740 --> 01:03:41,260
Really? Yeah.
644
01:03:41,800 --> 01:03:45,760
Really? That's not what I expected you
to say, but okay.
645
01:03:50,730 --> 01:03:51,730
Pretty face.
646
01:03:52,310 --> 01:03:55,030
Yeah, I think I could do that. Yeah, I
think you can.
647
01:03:56,310 --> 01:03:57,970
I believe in you.
648
01:04:03,050 --> 01:04:04,490
Give me a hug.
649
01:04:38,330 --> 01:04:40,490
Yeah, I want you to come on my face.
650
01:05:38,800 --> 01:05:40,660
I guess you were right.
651
01:05:42,300 --> 01:05:45,020
I guess you were right.
652
01:05:54,350 --> 01:05:57,530
That you two can do this whenever she
needs it.
653
01:05:58,630 --> 01:06:00,430
Whenever you need it.
654
01:06:00,670 --> 01:06:01,770
That sounds good.
655
01:06:03,710 --> 01:06:06,730
It's okay to get what you need if it
sounds good for you.
656
01:06:07,010 --> 01:06:08,310
Thank you both.
657
01:06:23,600 --> 01:06:28,760
for being here today, for being present
and so open to new experiences.
658
01:06:29,200 --> 01:06:35,940
I really appreciate it. Thank you. And
now
659
01:06:35,940 --> 01:06:37,860
hopefully there's more open
communication.
660
01:06:38,200 --> 01:06:41,700
We don't need any more little white lies
to get mom into therapy.
661
01:06:42,500 --> 01:06:46,680
Right. I really do hope that this was
nice for you and, you know, it kind of
662
01:06:46,680 --> 01:06:50,200
like sinks in over the next week. If you
two would like to make another
663
01:06:50,200 --> 01:06:52,660
appointment, you can call myself.
664
01:06:53,100 --> 01:06:56,720
Of course, and she would be happy to
make one for you. Okay.
665
01:06:57,100 --> 01:07:00,700
Definitely. I would love to see you
again. I'll hope to see you in one to
666
01:07:00,700 --> 01:07:01,760
weeks. Okay.
667
01:07:02,120 --> 01:07:03,400
If you're open to it.
668
01:07:03,760 --> 01:07:07,420
And, yeah, in the meantime, I will email
you all the information that we talked
669
01:07:07,420 --> 01:07:10,760
about. And any questions?
670
01:07:11,100 --> 01:07:12,180
Are we forgetting anything?
671
01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:15,720
I don't believe so. Okay.
672
01:07:16,680 --> 01:07:18,360
We've covered just about everything.
673
01:07:18,660 --> 01:07:20,300
All right. I couldn't think of anything
either.
674
01:07:20,760 --> 01:07:25,780
There is... a little washroom just down
the hall if you would both like to get
675
01:07:25,780 --> 01:07:28,600
cleaned up, which I'm assuming you
especially would.
676
01:07:29,020 --> 01:07:31,320
Yeah, I should before I go outside.
677
01:07:31,780 --> 01:07:32,780
Probably.
678
01:07:33,060 --> 01:07:36,480
And, yeah, I think that's it.
679
01:07:36,840 --> 01:07:38,300
Okay, thank you so much.
680
01:07:39,420 --> 01:07:41,800
Thank you. It was nice to meet you, too.
52165
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