Original subtitles

So this is the guest room. This is where we'll be staying for most of the

evening. I put all of the kids' supplies over there.

There's a list of emergency numbers on the fridge.

If you need anything, please don't hesitate to call.

And I do have one really, really important rule.

Please, no guests at the house.

That shouldn't be a problem.

Okay, wonderful.

Is there anything else you need before I go?

I think we've got everything we need here. All right. I'll be back in a few

hours. Thank you very much. Have a great day.

You're welcome.

Please feel free to call if there's an emergency. And remember, no guests.

Hi, babe.

Yeah, she just left.

Baby's asleep, so there's not really much for me to do except just, like, you

know, hang out.

What are you up to? How was your day?

Yeah.

Well, I mean, we'll get together this weekend.

She specifically said no.

No gas.

I mean, I know, but, like, she said no gas.

So... What do you want me to do?

I mean, I don't know. She's got, like, a nanny cam or something.

Like...

It could be, like, anywhere.

Where's my purse?

Okay, fine.

You can come over.

You have to be really, like, stealth, like James Bond shit, like parked on the

street, you know.

She can't know that you're here. I mean, she said specifically no people coming

over. And if I have you come over, like, it's not going to be good for me.

I'm really excited to see you, though.

I'll call you in a minute.

Not going to be good for you?

Who are you talking to?

Um, pizza.

Because it really sounded like you were inviting somebody over to my home.

Somebody romantic?

Did you invite a boy into my house?

No, definitely did not invite a boy.

Who were you talking to?

Just a friend.

It sounded like you were talking to somebody more than just a friend.

Somebody romantic?

So if it's not a boyfriend, were you inviting your girlfriend?

To my house?

Were you going to have sex in this bed?

I mean, we were just talking about our weekend plans.

Really? Yeah.

It sounded like you were trying to plan a sexual encounter in my

house. Oh, no, no, I would never do that. I mean, pizza's a very sexual

for some people.

Oh. Some interesting sex.

And then...

Phone call.

You were.

You were going to have sex in my house.

The thing about that is, only I get to have sex in my house.

Okay. But my date's not nearly as pretty as you

are and sound like you are in the mood.

I, you know, I'm just hungry.

You're just hungry?

They're not loving you.

I didn't say that.

No.

You weren't going to bring your girlfriend into my bed.

This is the guest bed.

What?

I... It was not, um...

You have to go somewhere, don't you?

No,

I'm like certified and shit for, you know, CPR.

I'm okay with that.

Oh.

Okay.

that much longer

You're never gonna hire me again.

Not so good you're in bed, doesn't it?

That's not awkward at all.

Oh my god, are you gonna kill me?

Are you gonna tell her?

No.

No.

Definitely a no.

This is a really bad idea.

do that.

Damn, damn, damn.

This is your girlfriend, you're the best.

Oh my god, yes.

Did you hold it with your tongue?

Fuck!

Fuck! Yes, just like that.

I'm home.

Yes. Yes.

Don't make that up.

Yeah.

Yes.