Original subtitles

Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull

♪ When skies Are cloudy and gray ♪

♪ They're only gray For a day ♪

♪ So wrap your troubles In dreams ♪

♪ And dream all Your troubles away ♪

♪ Till that sunshine Peeps through ♪

♪ There's only one thing to do ♪

♪ Just wrap your troubles In dreams ♪

♪ And dream all Your troubles away ♪

♪ Castles may tumble ♪

♪ That's fate, after all ♪

♪ Life's really funny That way ♪

♪ No need to grumble ♪

♪ Smile when they fall ♪

♪ Weren't you king For a day? ♪

♪ Just remember that sunshine ♪

♪ Always follows the rain ♪

♪ Come on and wrap Your troubles in dreams ♪

♪ And dream your troubles away ♪

Oh, I actually don't know where to begin.

Suddenly, I had to stop work on the novel I was writing

and accompany my wife

to the San Sebastián Film Festival.

Well Sue had to go.

For her, it was work.

She represented several clients who were there

and did the press for them.

Now the ironic part was that, uh, you know,

years ago when I taught my film class,

the thought of going to any film festival

would've been very exciting to me.

But, uh, film festivals are no longer what they were.

I mean, it was no longer what I was teaching.

I taught Cinema as Art: the Great European Masters.

I only went because I couldn't shake the suspicion

that she had a little crush on this bullshit movie director

she did publicity for.

In my new movie on the Eichmann trial,

you would be perfect to play Hannah Arendt.

You know, tonight at 8:00, there's a special screening

of an old Three Stooges movie,

the director's cut.

In the movie,

were all your orgasms special effects?

Oh, look. There's Philippe.

Oh, my God, I love his look. He is so chic.

- ...the idea of myself - Uh-huh.

And sometimes, you know,

the public, you know, gives you a different idea of yourself.

Now, remember,

you guys met that time at that screening at Universal.

You got in that stupid argument over Bringing Up Baby.

He loved it and you didn't.

And he loved Some Like It Hot and you didn't.

And he loved It's a Wonderful Life

with the rest of the world, and you didn't.

- Mm-hm. - Do you remember?

And then he made that joke and he called you the Grinch.

- I remember the joke. - Mm-hm.

Everyone in Europe loves your new movie.

It was a big hit at the screening this morning.

War is hell, and you came out and said it.

Well, you know, some wars are good.

Some wars are bad.

You know, sometimes wars are justified.

Can you tell us what your next film will be?

Well in my next film,

I'm taking on the turmoil in the Middle East,

and, uh,

hopefully, uh, offer some solution

for reconciliation between the Arabs and Israel.

It's rumored you had an affair

with the French minister's wife.

I heard that same rumor, yeah.

The rumor is you made her pregnant.

Can you make any comment on that?

Okay, that's enough.

- That's great. - Thank you.

He has interviews all day tomorrow.

Gracias. Three full days of interviews.

Thank you so much. Gracias.

You have arrived just in time.

I'm so sorry about that.

Ah-uh, you know, you remember Mort, yeah?

Oh, yes.

The Grinch.

Hey, congratulations on your new film.

Everyone seems to love it.

Yeah, but in this day and age,

you know, any film that deals with the reality,

the critics rave about as art.

Well war is hell.

I mean, as far as insights go...

Okay.

We should probably go unpack.

Mm?

You know, I'd really appreciate it

if you kind of watched yourself.

Your hostility is starting to show.

Well I can't say I relish it,

being referred to as the Grinch.

Well it's just that you put everything down as "lowbrow."

Oh, I don't put his stuff down as lowbrow.

It's middle-brow.

I think he's politically relevant.

I mean, you heard him talk about his next movie.

H-he's going to try to reconcile the Arabs and Israel.

Yes, I'm glad he's turning to science fiction.

Philippe is so brilliant.

Christ.

What is politics? Politics is totally ephemeral.

It misses the big questions.

- What big questions? - The big questions.

Like?

Well...

"What's it all about?"

"Is this everything that there is,

or is there more?"

I mean,

those are the questions that really matter.

The things he deals with are actually trivial,

although he thinks they're so profound.

They're not.

I mean, we could have an ideal world politically,

and we'd still have

these very same terrifying questions.

Oy.

My heart is starting to hurt me.

And here we go.

Yeah, I know. You think it's all in the head.

You're not having a heart attack, Mort.

You just ate too many tacos on the plane.

Well those tacos were like barbells.

Well...

When I went to sleep that night,

I had an odd dream.

Rose

Budnick.

- Who? - Rose Budnick.

She died.

Oh, my God. How?

Well she committed suicide.

Oh, no.

Oh, she was such a brilliant woman.

She... an intellectual.

She was a Holocaust survivor.

She left a note.

She decided life was meaningless.

She found no point in going on.

Oh, how crazy, to... to judge life as meaningless.

Well if you think about it, Max, what does it mean?

You sound like one of my students.

Why are we all here?

It's, uh, cosmic fluctuations.

We happened to pop into being out of nothing.

Believe me, if it were up to me,

I would've done it differently.

Don't have this conversation in front of Mort.

He has nightmares.

Mort?

Come inside. It's too cold.

I had a strange dream last night.

Well I don't have time to hear about it.

I'm running late.

Will I see you for lunch?

Nope.

I am lunching with Philippe

and the reporter from Paris Match.

It is a work lunch.

I mean, today is insane. We are totally slammed.

We got wall-to-wall interviews all day.

And you have to be at all the interviews?

Yeah, of course I do.

That's why we're here. It's my job.

I can't say I wasn't a little uncomfortable

about Sue spending all day with Philippe,

with his pretentious bullshit.

She thinks he's a genius.

Her whole life,

she was attracted to brilliant men.

She even thought I was a major intellectual.

When we first met,

she was so impressed with my magazine articles,

my think pieces.

She thought I had a novel in me.

When I showed her my first pages,

she said they were turgid.

Now it's clear.

She's starting to think she bet on the wrong horse.

I didn't know where I was going.

I walked all morning.

I thought about my life, my father.

I disappointed him.

My brother was the big earner.

I thought about my book

and how tough it was to write a really great book,

not just another novel, but a masterpiece.

Shakespeare created masterpieces.

Michelangelo, Joyce,

Chaplin,

Fellini.

Ah, Fellini.

I taught a course in Fellini.

I identified with his films.

Mort, when is your book going to be finished?

- I'm working on it! - Mort Rifkin?

Oh, goodness!

- As I live and breathe. - My God.

Miss Weinstein, my English teacher.

You showed great promise as a writer.

- I wound up teaching film. - Well.

- I had to make a living. - Yeah.

But I'm working on a novel.

Just try not to make it turgid.

Tell me, Mort,

are you still asking those big questions?

God, death, the meaning of life?

Rabbi Mintz, yes.

They're the only questions worth asking.

The rest is all trivia.

You know, I sometimes wonder if you're a true Jew.

You don't observe the Sabbath, you ridicule your religion,

you've never been to Israel.

What would God say if you met face-to-face?

After what God's done, I have nothing to say to him.

Let him talk to my lawyer.

Who but a Jew would think of suing God?

Who but a Jew would have a slam-dunk case?

Hello, Mort. Are you here for the festival?

Marcia Cohen!

You were the neighborhood girl I truly lost my heart for.

You were the only boy who read the Russians and Proust

and took me to see plays by Ionesco and Beckett.

My mother and father fell in love with you,

just not me.

Your parents would be disappointed in me.

I still haven't found myself.

Keep plugging.

And, oh, happy birthday.

Ooh, don't remind me.

The clock is ticking.

Mom and Dad?

What are you doing in San Sebastián?

We just came to give you a piece of advice, son.

Was gonna have it put on my tombstone when I died,

but your mother thought it was too vulgar.

And that advice is?

Money talks, shit walks.

Mort.

Mort Rifkin.

Tomás.

- How great. - How are you, my friend?

- Hey. - So good to see you.

- Wonderful. - What's going on?

How's your festival going?

Well the festival here is always a pleasure.

My company has a film in competition this year.

Ah.

Y-you seemed like you were lost.

No, no, I just... I'm just... I'm still jet lagged.

Got it. Got it.

Well it's great this year.

Mort, let me tell you.

I love this festival, you know?

It's such a break from the real world.

For ten days, I mean, this... look at that...

magical city and cinema is king.

I feel it.

I felt it when I got off the plane.

I ran into Sue this morning, you know?

Oh, Sue is up to her neck in work.

Well she didn't look up to her neck.

She was just having a good time,

walking on the beach

with that French director, uh, Philippe Germain.

You know him?

She was walking on the beach with him?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She did mention that there was some interview

that got canceled.

I was doing my morning jog

and I see this couple from the distance,

and at first, I thought I was interrupting something,

until I realized it was your wife.

Sue and I go back ages,

from the times we both worked at Paramount.

And she introduced me to this director,

and let me tell you something, Mort:

this guy is the real deal.

I've seen his film.

It's just... it's great.

Well I... I know it's against war.

Yeah, but it has such a positive attitude.

I mean, it lifts your spirits, really.

Mm-hm.

And they were walking on the beach together?

Yep. Mm-hm.

What's going on? You look pale.

You know, to tell you the truth,

I've been experiencing some chest pains.

Chest pains are never good, man.

Since when?

Oh, since I left New York.

Really? Left side or right side?

Sort of here.

Wow.

Maybe you wanna have that checked out, Mort.

Well when I get back to the city,

I definitely will.

How long are you here for?

For the whole festival.

Mort, if they persist, I'd see someone.

Really.

It's like a tightening?

Well I do feel, in a way, a kind of tingling.

Radiating, right?

- Well, maybe. - Oh, boy.

Oh, boy. That's not good.

I recognize the symptoms from my cousin's coronary.

I mean, no other warning.

He just went... like that.

Well how old w...

Forty-eight.

Can you believe it?

Early detection is the key to survival here.

Remember that.

I'm sure the hotel would know a doctor.

You wanna get some random hotel doctor, Mort?

No, th-th-this is your heart, after all.

We're talking about your life, here.

Ah.

This head of mine.

I got a number.

A good doctor that lives here.

Yes, Gil Brenner gave it to me.

Not that I ever needed to use it,

but just in case.

Dr. Jo Rojas.

Dr. Rojas is at the hospital till this afternoon,

but can you come in tomorrow morning?

- Hey. - Hi.

Oh, my God.

What a day. I need a drink.

You cannot believe how stupid these questions are.

- No breaks? - Ugh. Not really.

I mean, one interviewer, you know, they canceled.

So we had a half an hour to get some fresh air.

What'd you do?

Well, we went out, um, and had a smoke.

Well, I mean, you know, Philippe had a smoke.

- Señora. - Hi.

Uh, a...

a vodka martini, please.

- Gracias. - A glass of red wine.

Red wine?

You're drinking red wine because of your heart?

Well they say that it's, uh, you know.

Oh, there's Philippe.

I invited him to have dinner with us.

- How are you? - You did?

Yeah. I didn't think you'd mind.

Listen, Mort, he really is... uh, respects your opinions.

Well I was looking forward

to having a quiet little dinner,

just with the two of us.

I know. I know.

But he's here all alone.

It would be kind of rude not to include him.

Hey, you know, I ran into Tomás Lopez today.

- Mm. - Yeah.

He said he saw you and Philippe on the beach earlier.

Yeah.

I mean, I told you that, you know,

the interviewer canceled and...

we had a little breathing room

away from the madding crowd.

I don't understand anything this says...

Hi. Sorry I'm late.

Hi. Yeah, no, no, no. It's okay.

I was talking with that critic

from some highbrow film magazine.

You know,

he thinks my film should be mandatory viewing at the UN.

Well any film that can do big box office

and also bring world peace.

You know, that's actually a great idea.

I mean, can you imagine the coup,

the press coup, if we had the premiere...

the New York premiere at the UN?

It would be incredible, right?

Yeah.

Well we put in quite a day today, huh?

You did. You were unbelievable.

Can I have one vodka martini, please, sir?

With a twist of lemon.

- Right? - Oof.

- You have good memory, huh? - Oh, you know.

That's amazing.

- Hey... - What?

Also, I have to say,

I thought you were very eloquent

with the guy from Denmark.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, the guy from Denmark.

- Yeah. - Oh, my God.

You should've heard what he said

about world hunger.

You were against it, I imagine.

No, I thought he was so smart.

- He was definitely by far... - No, he was smart. Yeah, yeah.

The smartest journalist there.

And that woman. Oh, my God.

- Which one? - The one from Paris.

- Which woman from Paris? - The one.

The one who said that she thinks you're the greatest

- innovator of film... - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Since the Nouvelle Vague. - She was very intelligent.

Yeah, yeah. She was very intelligent.

You know, from the very beginning,

I was such a fan of Godard and Truffaut

and... Claude Lelouch!

A Man and a Woman.

And the stuff you were saying to her

about the montage.

- Oh, yes, yes. - I mean,

- she was eating that up. - Yes, the montage, yeah.

I mean, I just thought she was gonna start licking you

- all over the place. - But you know what?

- You know, I missed something. - It was so incredible.

Because my influences... you know, my influences

were more John Ford, you know?

- Howard Hawks, you know? - Right, right, right.

- I missed that, you know? - I-I just always

loved Breathless

and Jules and Jim.

Jules and Jim was such a masterpiece.

And-and-and how indebted you are to Frank Capra.

- Yes, of course. - You know, the three of those.

- And... - Yeah, Capra.

From the minute it came out,

Jules and Jim was an incredible influence

on other films.

You know, what I like about the American masters

is their sense of optimism.

- Oh, yeah, yeah. - You know?

If you'll notice, I always...

you know, I always try to leave the audience

with a sense of hope.

There's no doubt the American masters were wonderful,

but, um...

generations of Americans were misled

into thinking that Hollywood endings were real

and not make-believe.

And then the Europeans came along

and movies grew up.

My view is less...

Less pessimistic, you know?

In the end, I believe art makes it all worthwhile.

- Mm. - Art and love.

With the right person, you know?

Romance.

You know? Adventure, passion.

All these things make life a positive experience.

But we had this conversation earlier today

- when we discussed passion... - Yeah, yeah.

- And how few people... - Right.

Really understand the rules of desire, you know?

Yeah.

That was... that was a good conversation.

Yeah. You recall now.

- I like... - Yeah. Well, you're amazing.

- I like women who achieve. - Yeah.

I mean, I find their energy sexy.

I think I'm gonna have the Dover sole.

Sue and I had a little tiff,

which is not a good thing to do before retiring.

I said it was a joke

to compare Philippe to the French New Wave directors.

Truffaut was absolutely dazzling,

and Philippe was totally derivative.

To compare Philippe's work to Jules and Jim

was absurd.

When I finally dropped off to sleep,

I had another odd dream.

When we first met,

she was not only a great beauty,

she was so impressive.

Sarah Lawrence literature major.

She was absolutely brilliant,

but very neurotic.

And then she found you what?

A genius in the rough.

We used to have the most amazing discussions.

Books, the theater, serious music,

that summer in Newport.

And now you and I are both in love with her.

Mm, what are you two talking about?

That we are both in love with you.

Hmm.

My first husband was so possessive.

Smothering, always accusing me of things he was doing himself.

And then I met Mort,

who's sweet and brilliant.

But I still feel like I've never really lived,

loved passionately, full of wild abandon,

and soon it's gonna be too late.

- Now we've met. - Yes.

And yet, you still love him.

I'm used to him.

Ooh, I wish the three of us could all move in together.

Well you two seem to have hit it off quite intensely.

Mort, would you be up for a ménage à trois

if the three of us lived together?

- Too bohemian for me. - Mm.

I mean, despite all my talk about existential freedom

and Dionysus,

I'm a middle-class Jew from the Bronx.

- Mm. - Well think about it.

I mean, it's very Left Bank,

and you know you love everything Parisian.

Philippe and I can sleep in the bedroom,

and you could have the pullout sofa.

What a powerful dream.

And it's true.

Sue would be up for anything.

She has no inhibitions.

She's curious to try things.

She has no fear.

Meanwhile, I'm full of fears

because I'm so aware of the fragility of life.

The doctor will see you now.

Oh.

Thank you.

Hello.

I'm Dr. Rojas.

Oh!

Oh.

Something wrong?

Wrong? Something wrong?

You mean my chest pains?

Well they were there this morning.

Tell me about them.

Have you ever had any heart problems?

No, uh,

although... although I... I sometimes get heartburn

if I eat Indian food.

Uh-huh.

And how long have you had these pains?

Just since leaving New York. Just a few days.

Mm-hm. You have them before?

Uh, not really. No, I mean...

You are visiting San Sebastián?

Yes.

Uh, I'm just here for the film festival.

Oh, I see.

And I had these pains

and someone gave me your number, and, uh...

I actually live in... in New York City.

Upper East Side.

72nd Street.

Have you ever visited New York?

Yeah, I went to NYU for a little bit.

You know, I stayed with my aunt and uncle.

They live on 5th and 72nd.

What?

No.

That's an incredible coincidence.

Yeah, I was going to practice in New York.

What brought you here?

My husband.

Um...

is it a sharp pain or a pressure?

What? Oh.

Uh, um, uh...

Well it's actually not kicking in at this very moment.

So I don't really know.

Are you part of the festival?

No, no, no,

but my, uh...

um, Sue is my friend, and...

well, she's actually my wife.

She has a film with the festival?

She's...

No, she runs a publicity firm.

She has clients here.

She's actually managing

the Saturday night movie.

Uh, Apocalyptic Dreams.

Can I be frank?

You didn't like it?

Pretentious.

Very...

Very commercial stuff trying to pass as art,

but I seem to be in a minority.

Oh, no, no. I'm right along with you.

Well I'm just gonna get a closer look.

So... you are married?

- Mm. - Um...

are you under any stress?

What do you do?

Oh, I see. You're a writer.

- I'm working on a novel. - Mm-hm.

It's sort of my breakthrough attempt.

And, well, naturally, I want it to be a masterpiece.

Naturally, yeah.

I mean, I find myself just writing a page

and then ripping it up

and then writing another page,

ripping it up!

I mean...

I don't want to write just one more lousy, mediocre novel.

You know what I mean?

I mean, my point of view is,

if you can't get into the big leagues

with... with Joyce and Dostoevsky,

I'd rather just take my ball and go home.

As far as I can tell,

your heart is just fine.

Blood pressure is excellent.

So I'll get the results

of your blood test in a few days or so,

and if you don't hear from me,

it means everything is fine,

which I fully expect.

So try to enjoy the rest of your stay here.

Take care.

Thank you.

Um... yes.

Um...

oh, by the way...

Can I make a confession?

Yes.

I didn't know you were a woman.

I mean, when he said "Jo Rojas"...

Well, you know, some men can be shy,

getting examined by a woman.

Oh, no, not me. No, no.

I mean... I mean,

I only showed you a part of my chest.

Well enjoy the festival, eh?

Did I tell you I taught film?

You did? Hm.

There was a great period of cinema classics,

and that was my specialty:

great classic movies.

I mean, naturally,

I gravitated toward the great European directors.

You know, Fellini and Bergman.

I remember all those wonderful Truffaut movies.

And Godard.

Seems that you... know about film.

Not really, but, you know,

I spent a lot of time in Paris.

I lived there for a while,

and I used to go to the Cinémathèque.

And, you know, the films were all classics.

And it was cheap.

Well.

Gee, I wonder who she's married to.

What a charming woman.

She really put a charge in my day.

She said she'd call

only if my blood work came back with a problem.

Talk about mixed feelings.

Too bad I already got my flu shot.

That night,

I had dinner with a whole cluster of movie people.

Very dull.

Lots of talk about box office and grosses,

and don't think I didn't catch Sue and Philippe

exchanging knowing glances

and smiling at certain remarks

like they're the only ones in on some private joke.

Hey, Mort.

- Oh. - I just saw you passing by.

- Oh. - How you feeling?

- Much, much better. - Oh, so good to hear.

- Just coming in for a drink, and...

So why don't you join us?

- Oh. - Come on.

All right.

So, Mort, this is my friend Ramon Robles.

Ramon.

And this gentleman here is Gil Brenner.

- Hello, there. - Gil.

And Gil is the one

that gave me that doctor's name that I gave you.

- Oh, thank you. - You're welcome.

- Thank you. - You're welcome.

So you saw him?

Well, her.

Jo is actually a woman.

- Really? - Yeah. Isn't she lovely?

Oh, yes, she is.

And I saw her, and it all turned out fine.

- Oh, that's fantastic. - Oh, great.

Have you... have you known her for a long time?

Oh, yeah. We go way back.

I think I've known her since she was a student.

Oh.

And I've always thought she was so bright...

just, you know, great.

She married her college professor, in fact.

- Oh. - Yeah.

A brilliant guy. I mean, just brilliant.

But a total asshole.

- Oh, no. - I mean...

I mean, so smart and so terrible.

- Oh! - Yeah. She picks bad men.

- Oh, I'm so sorry. - Yeah.

I mean, I... you know, I wish I could tell you

she came to her senses and she dumped him,

but actually, he dumped her

and dated another college student.

- Oh, my God. - Yeah, I know.

She and I were in Paris together

around the same time, and I was working for MGM

and she was there kind of, you know, like, for a year,

kind of recuperating from the whole marriage fiasco.

Right.

And now she's been with this guy,

trying anyway, for a couple years.

- Mm-hm. - Wow.

- He's an asshole, too. - Oh!

Wha... uh, could I have a scotch?

Absolutely.

Well what does this new guy do?

He's a painter. He's from Madrid.

I think they met, I think, in Greenwich Village,

but he wanted to paint here, of course.

Why wouldn't he? So beautiful.

And he's good. He's talented.

But I hear he's a... You know.

Well Mort loves Paris.

Oh, yeah? Really?

You were thinking of living there once, right?

Well I actually lectured at the Cinémathèque...

in English, obviously,

about the influence of Pasolini on Bertolucci.

- Wow. - Oh, fantastic.

So is she happy with this painter?

Oh, I doubt it.

I mean, to me, she's a glutton for punishment.

- Señor. - Oh.

Well anyway, to your health, Mort.

To your health.

I didn't hear anything about a rare blood disease.

So I kind of gave up on ever seeing the doctor again.

But I can't say she wasn't on my mind.

Only another hour, and we'll be in Paris.

Do you believe in love at first sight?

I do.

I knew I wanted you

when you told me there was nothing wrong with my heart

and it was just reflux.

"Reflux" is such a pretty word,

don't you think?

When you say it.

Reflux.

I just can't wait till we get to Paris

so you can start me on Lipitor.

We'll walk the streets of Paris

and eat at brasseries

and you'll finish your novel.

Exactly how high was my cholesterol?

One hundred eighty-five.

But together, we'll get it down.

♪

I don't think she felt you needed any follow-up.

I know,

but, uh, I have a little...

a little bump on my hand

that I'd love her to take a quick look at.

Um, okay.

Let's see.

Her last patient is at 6:00.

Could you come at 6:30?

Maybe she could fit you in before she goes home.

I can do 6:30. I'll be there.

- They have to look good. - Well that's what the...

Hey! Hey, what you doing?

Oh, hi!

Um, just going up for a quick shower and a shave.

Why? Where are you going?

Well, nowhere. I just have been out walking.

Well we've got the screening to go to.

- What screening? - Breathless.

You know, they're giving

Jean-Luc Godard the life achievement award.

Remember?

I mean, I know Godard's your guy,

and so we gotta go.

I-I have an appointment at 6:30.

- With who? - A doctor.

- What's wrong with you now? - Oh, just my hand.

Oh, my God.

First it's your heart. Now it's a hand.

What's wrong with your hand?

- I have a red bump! - Where?

Where?

Oh, my God. Mort, I can barely see that.

That's a... it's a bug bite.

Well I'd prefer to hear that from a qualified physician.

I'm a qualified physician.

You are?

- Dermatologist. - This is Dr. Klein.

He's only the biggest dermatologist in all of Europe.

Mind if I take a look?

- Mm. Thanks. - All right.

Yeah, she's right. It's just a bug bite.

- It is? - Oh, it's nothing.

- Yeah. - Be gone by tomorrow.

Great. So call your doctor and cancel.

And we gotta get going.

You know, I went through a lot of trouble

to get these three tickets.

Three?

Of course. Philippe is dying to see it.

He's seen it a million times,

but, you know, he wants to make a remake.

- So... - Oh.

Mm.

I want you to try some.

You know, doing some drugs,

it might liberate your writing.

You didn't used to have to dope up.

Oh, Jesus.

I'm not doping up.

Well how long are you gonna smoke?

I don't know.

It's... I'm not getting any kind of buzz for some reason.

You know, Philippe smokes all the time

when he's writing his film scripts.

Judging from his movies,

I get the feeling he smokes Ativan.

You just resent him

because he's found himself as an artist.

Well that's easy to do if you're willing to settle.

But Chekhov didn't settle.

Stendhal didn't settle.

Stravinsky didn't settle.

Did it ever occur to you

you might have a slightly inflated self-image?

It's just sad.

You're an intellectual, not a poet.

If you were to have a threesome,

who would it be with?

I don't know. What about you?

Mm. I don't know.

Ryan Gosling.

Tom Hardy.

What about you?

I don't know.

I guess Doris.

Your brother's wife?

Well I met her first.

Why do you think she married him?

I don't know.

I mean, I thought she loved me,

but you can never tell about these things.

Does your brother know you lust after his wife?

I don't lust after her.

You asked about a threesome, and I gave it some thought.

And why are we under these sheets?

I'm suffocating.

You're said to a woman's director.

Well, uh, I have to tell you something.

I'm a romantic.

And as the song goes,

"I fall in love too easily."

I appreciate women because,

unlike men, who find it weak to show their feelings,

you know,

women, they never hide their emotions.

Is it true that you just bought a sailboat?

Yeah. I've sailed all my life.

I think the sea

is the last place a person can really be free.

You know, I used to sail.

- Oh, yeah? - Mm-hmm.

It was my absolute favorite thing in the world to do.

We had a summer home in Newport, Rhode Island,

and my dad taught me how to sail.

Oh, that's funny because you know what?

My dad taught me to sail, too.

- Really? Huh. - Yeah. He was in the Navy.

Wow.

What an amazing life you've had, huh?

Oh, incidentally, I thought you answered that question

about love and passion...

the silly thing, you know?

- Mm-hmm. - So great.

I hope I didn't make you feel uneasy.

No, I-I thought I was gonna have to bail you out there

for a second, but...

Is it because you sensed I was talking about you?

You shouldn't say that.

Why not?

Because, you know, I...

I don't know.

I mean, it's not that I'm not flattered.

Yeah.

But what?

I don't know.

I just think...

I don't know.

You're making me confront feelings

that I've been pushing back on.

And, I don't know, I keep going back and forth.

I'm just... I'm just a little confused at this moment.

You know, sometimes,

if the right person comes along,

the hard decisions become much easier.

I have a lovely new boat

and I'm a very good sailor.

Mm.

Would it be terrible,

sailing with me to Koh Rong?

Where?

To Koh Rong.

It's an island in the south seas.

- Are you serious? - Yeah.

I... Oh, God.

You have this weird ability

to tap into my most personal fantasies.

- It's... - Yeah. I'm a film director.

I understand human psychology.

And I know when a woman is dreaming

about having a love affair.

Oh, God, you're touching my face now.

Yeah.

No. I...

do you know what you are doing to me?

Oh, yeah.

I have a little ringing in my ears.

And I'm... I just want to, um, uh, check it out

to make sure I don't have a brain tumor

or an acoustical neuroma.

Usually, when I go see a doctor,

I'm terrified.

I always think they're gonna give me one month to live.

And with my luck, it'll be February.

But with Dr. Rojas,

I wouldn't mind a checkup every day,

not that the thought of anything happening with her

is even a remote possibility

for so many reasons.

But that's what I thought when I first saw Sue.

I bought a guidebook

to see if there were any sights I'd overlooked

while I killed time before my appointment.

I'd like to say whenever I'm in a church,

it's only the aesthetics I respond to.

But I love visiting any house of worship.

I have great respect for religious faith.

I read the entire Bible cover to cover

and fell in love with Eve,

Job's wife, and Delilah.

My shrink says

I'm attracted to women who will hurt me.

The New Testament is much more forgiving.

At least the Messiah shows up.

Jesus comes dressed very simply.

He heals people. He does miracles.

Yet, he's a regular guy,

a common workingman.

That's why, in my college thesis,

I wrote he shouldn't have risen from the dead on Easter.

He's a professional carpenter.

He should've risen on Labor Day.

I certainly had it constantly and intermittently.

And now, I think you've made it go away.

Oh, that's so great. Good news.

And-and how have you been since I last saw you?

I've been... great. Yeah.

And are you still missing New York?

Uh, yeah, sometimes.

You know, I miss walking around.

I like to stroll and window-shop.

You should've practiced in New York.

The doctors there do very well.

The ironic thing is I come from Spain

and traveled all the way to New York to study

and wind up back in Spain with a Spanish painter.

He picked me up in Greenwich Village

at the Minetta Tavern.

I probably would've been too shy to try to pick you up.

I mean, I was never good at that, you know?

To see a fascinating woman

sitting at a table in a restaurant and...

no, I...

I probably would've just felt my heart beating faster

and I would've just said to myself,

"Well, she is so amazing

"that I'm sure she'll just brush me off

if I go up to her and try to say something."

You never know.

- Yes? - Sorry.

Your husband is on one, and I'm going.

I'll drop these forms off with the hospital

on my way home.

Okay, yeah. Uh, have a good weekend.

See you Monday.

Okay. Excuse me one minute.

Um...

well, I can give you some...

some drops for your ear,

but I really don't think it's necessary.

So tell me,

what was your favorite place

to hang out in Central Park?

What?

I always loved to be at the sailboat pond.

Sailboat...

And did you get to see

much Shakespeare in the Park?

It was so great to go on those summer nights.

Yes, I did.

Could you please excuse me for one more minute?

Sorry for that.

Uh...

what were you saying?

Central Park.

Oh, Central Park.

Yes. I...

Ooh.

I spent a lot of time at the Met.

And I love sitting on the steps...

Even in the spring.

Did you used to eat at that crazy café on Madison Avenue?

I'm sorry. I think you should go.

Well of course I'll go.

But are you all right?

It's nothing.

I mean, is there anything I can do?

- I... - All right, I just...

And I did always eat at all those coffee shops.

I love them.

Look, can I buy you a drink?

No, thank you.

You look like you can use a drink

and maybe someone to talk to from the old neighborhood.

Yes, you know, we...

we bring our troubles on ourselves.

I'm not sure that's true. Have a Kleenex.

Thank you.

Alcohol is not good for you,

but sometimes it's the only thing that works.

Can I be the doctor for a minute?

- Hmm? - Can I be the doctor?

- Sure. - Tell me your symptoms.

My...

my marriage is causing me pain....

Here.

And why is that?

Why am I telling you this?

I should never drink.

Okay, tell the truth.

Do you love your husband?

I don't know anymore.

And does he love you?

He has affairs.

And I accept that.

After all, he is an artist,

and you can't judge an artist by bourgeois standards.

He's...

he's creative and tempestuous.

Well if you had agreed to an open marriage, I...

I did.

- Oh. - Yes.

And do you also have affairs?

No, I never have.

Because?

Because I've never met anyone

I wanted to have an affair with.

But if you're unhappy,

why don't you leave him?

He needs me.

How long have you been married?

Five years.

- And you? - Oh, much more than that.

Are you faithful?

I have been.

Never looked at another woman?

Yeah, I mean, of course I look.

I look. I... I drool.

But I have been faithful.

We are both faithful.

Another coincidence.

I mean, to be absolutely honest,

my marriage has been...

you know, fraying...

for... a while now.

Paco is high-strung...

- Huh. - Dramatic...

temperamental,

hard to live with.

And if I say I'm gonna leave him,

he weeps and threatens to kill himself.

Oh, he's bluffing.

Well you said he was dramatic.

How do you know he's bluffing?

Because nobody wants to die,

not even for love.

You wouldn't die for love?

I'd frankly prefer not to die for anything,

and that includes sickness, old age,

or choking on a bagel.

My life here is not so bad.

San Sebastián is not New York, but...

you know, life here is nice and beautiful.

This is a charming city. Have you seen the city?

Well my wife knows it well,

and she's been here many times,

but she's too busy to show me around, you know?

Would you like to see some of the nice parts?

Yes, I would really love that.

Where are you staying?

At the Maria Cristina.

Okay.

So I'll pick you up tomorrow

at 10:30 in front of the hotel.

Hey. Where have you been?

Me? Where have I been?

Well I went out first

and, well, then I stopped off at the doctor's office.

Why? Did someone give you a gift certificate?

I had a little ringing in my ear.

- Huh. - But it's all gone now.

I mean, it's, like, 8:00.

My God, how long had you been there for?

There was a line and, uh,

I got fitted in at the end.

You kind of smell like alcohol.

Have you been drinking?

- Me? - Yeah, you.

You. You.

What is going on with you?

You're all, like, in a daze.

Well I had a drink with Tomás Lopez.

We-we, uh, ran into each other,

and I had a quick drink with him

and that's why I'm a little late.

Uh-huh.

I tried calling you a few times.

but you never picked up your phone.

What's this?

It-it's a-it's a book on Ingmar Bergman.

The Swedish journalist gave one to Philippe,

but he already had it.

So I know how much you love Bergman.

So there you go.

- It's stunning. - Come on, come on, come on.

We gotta go. Hurry up.

Not another screening.

No. A cocktail party.

If you hate it, you don't have to go.

Is Philippe going?

Well of course Philippe is going.

It's in his honor.

I swear, he hates parties, too.

And yet he manages never to miss one.

I know.

It's so silly.

He complains the whole time,

but he really loves all the attention.

I swear to God, he's just like a little kid.

Exactly.

He's like a little kid with a narcissistic disorder.

Yeah, she's so happy. She starts shooting in March.

Wow, that's fantastic. She's got the money?

Yeah, it's an all-female version of Lysistrata.

Huh.

- Huh. - There you two are.

Hi.

Did you hear about Philippe's movie

winning the big prize in Cologne, Germany today?

- Very exciting. Huh! - Mm-hm.

Wasn't Eichmann from there?

Well I hope you're both coming

to the Altxerri Jazz Club later on.

Of course.

I wouldn't miss it for the world.

Are you being knighted?

No.

Philippe happens to be a fabulous bongo player

and he's sitting in with the band tonight.

- Not fabulous. - Oh.

By the way, those Swedish journalists

who saw the movie this morning

loved, loved, loved, loved it.

- Yes. Cool. - Yes.

Yes, and they wanted to come and see you play tonight.

Okay, cool.

Isn't that exciting, Mort?

Not since Neil Armstrong walked onto the moon.

I never cheated on Mort...

but I came very close.

Once with a prominent architect

who fell in love with me.

And he wanted to take me away to Africa on safari.

And I really wanted to go.

But at the last minute,

I just wasn't ready to have an affair.

The silence of God

drove me crazy.

Until one day he spoke to me.

And God said, "I've seen Mort...

And if I were you

I'd definitely cheat on him."

I am lost and confused.

I believe that God punishes us for our sins...

But Sue and myself have no sins.

And Mort's only sin is -

that he likes movies with subtitles.

You know, since coming to the film festival,

I have had the strangest thoughts and dreams.

Well, you know what they say:

"Films are like celluloid dreams."

So you'll busy with all sorts of press stuff today?

Yes, Mort.

I told you when you decided to come

I was gonna be very, very busy,

and now here you are with nobody to play with.

Oh, no. I'm fine.

I thought I'd get a car driver

and look around outside the town, maybe.

That's an amazing idea.

- Hey. - Oh, hey!

How are you? Ready?

- Oh, my God. - How are you, Mort? Hi.

How divine was Philippe on those bongos last night?

Oh, thank you, thank you. I hope it wasn't too loud.

- Oh, no. - But I get carried away.

- Oh, my God. - No, no.

I got some earplugs on the plane,

and I got a chance to try them out.

- Oh, it's 10:15. - Yeah. I don't wanna...

- We gotta run. Yeah. - Ciao, Mort.

All right. See you later.

Let's get some chocolate. I love chocolate.

Oh, so do I.

And I love bread and chocolate together.

Oh, they always... yeah.

Such a beautiful combination.

What about sandwich of chocolate?

Exactly.

You ever try a sandwich of chocolate?

A sandwich of chocolate.

Okay, so I asked you this when you were drunk.

Mm-hm?

And now I'm gonna ask you while you're sober.

If you're having such difficulty with your marriage,

why don't you leave?

I know.

I guess it's a little bit of everything.

He loves me.

I can't help who he is.

The ordeal of starting over.

- A second divorce. - Mm-hm.

And then lately,

I've been tempted to give up my practice

and do something else.

And that desire scares me.

What-what would you do?

Anything. I don't know.

Write, read.

Maybe just study, take classes.

Discover what I really want, who I really am.

Maybe just be dilettante. Is that so bad?

Just to dabble with different things,

to enjoy my life,

not to have to do anything.

No more obligations to Paco,

to all my patients.

It's amazing how few people

actually take a moment, quit the rat race,

and try to learn what they want,

who they are, who they actually are,

not who they think they have to be.

Do you know who you are?

You know, I thought I did.

But, uh,

boy, since coming here,

I've had some very odd thoughts.

At home, I was totally preoccupied with my book.

Then I came to the film festival.

My mind started playing tricks on me.

Now I'm beginning to question everything,

what I want, who I am.

Who in the world am I?

I think the problem with that is

the answers are not always what you want to hear.

I think I was probably happiest in my life

when I was teaching movies.

You know, the wine has made me tired.

The wine, or...

my fascinating conversation?

Too much, right?

Yeah, that's great.

Yeah, great.

- Aw. - Look.

Ah. Well, then...

You know, I have been

so looking forward to this weekend.

Friends, countryside,

and I gotta say, it has not disappointed.

Thanks for having us up here, Paul.

Next year, Doris and I are definitely

gonna rent a place here.

Well I grew up around here.

How about you, Mort?

You're a beach or a country man?

Paris is Mort's fantasy paradise.

Doris said you teach film class.

- That's true, yeah. - Must be fun.

Well it can be.

I mean, most of the kids are just so-so,

but I can always get a small portion of them

to really appreciate the great cinema classics,

and that makes it all worthwhile.

When I first started dating Mort,

he took me to see Red Desert, and I was bored;

and then he took me to see Last Year at Marienbad,

and I was bored;

and then he took me to see Claire's Knee,

and I was bored.

So I married his brother.

Mort regards any movie that entertains

or shows a profit as suspect.

Okay, Mr. Big Film Maven.

Tell us what we should rent to watch up here.

Chushingura by Inagaki.

- Mm. - Oh.

Who's in it?

Uh, Yuzo Kayama and Tatsuya Mihashi.

Yasumi wrote the screenplay. Toshio Yasumi.

There's also Kagemusha

with Tatsuya Nakadai

and music by Shinichiro Ikebe.

- I love you. - I love you.

Mm.

I think your brother still has a little crush on me.

It's understandable.

But it's his hard luck, you know?

He met you first, you guys had a few dates,

and he had his shot.

Mm-mm. He wasn't for me.

All that highfalutin bullshit.

"The big questions."

Give me a break.

He'll never write this alleged novel

he struggles with year after year.

I agree.

If it's not on the level with Dostoevsky,

it's beneath him.

Did you hear him in there,

talking about those Japanese movies?

Was he kidding?

- He's a pedant. - I know.

He writes and then he tears up the pages in frustration.

I predict he'll never finish writing that book

because it prevents him from facing an unpleasant truth

that maybe literary greatness isn't for him.

He's afraid of failing. He always was.

He equates failing with dying.

And you notice his wife didn't come this weekend.

Yeah. She had to be in Hollywood for some press,

and he doesn't like Hollywood.

I don't know how she puts up with him.

He's like a walking smorgasbord of neurosis.

She fell in love with his mind.

I called that one from the start.

She was coming out of a bad marriage

to some slick advertising hotshot,

and she found Mort brilliant.

I don't know if the glow has worn off, but...

I get the feeling she's very unsettled.

She's hot. She's ambitious.

Oy.

I never thought she'd be happy forever

with a cranky little introvert

who's searching for an answer

to why there's something rather than nothing.

Who knows?

All I know is that he was too cerebral for me,

not like his sexy brother.

- Aw. - Mm.

- I love you. - Mm, I love you, too.

The day has passed awfully fast.

Yes.

Can we stop by at the market?

I need to buy Paco a gift for his birthday.

Oh, that's very nice of you.

Do you like flea markets?

Well if you, uh, take me to a flea market...

- You'll come with me? - I'm gonna like it.

What do you think about this old cigarette case?

It's so deco.

Yeah. Does he smoke?

No. But it's pretty, no?

Yeah, it really is,

but what about getting him something he can actually use?

Like, uh, pajamas.

Oh, he doesn't sleep in pajamas.

And I don't think he'd appreciate a practical present.

He-he's too theatrical.

I always wanted an electric toothbrush.

What are you thinking?

I'm thinking that it's so pretty here.

And I've never traveled much.

I've never seen the pyramids or the Taj Mahal

or the Grand Canyon.

I really don't have any interest in seeing them,

but...

the Boulevard Saint-Michel in the rain

is a sight that would make me very happy.

- What was that? - Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

I have no idea.

Do you think it's a flat tire?

It could be, yeah.

Let me see if I can stop here.

- Um, all right. - Okay.

Oh, no.

I don't know.

Okay. Let me just look, okay?

Can you change a tire?

Me?

Okay.

Do you have any idea how to use

one of those automobile jack?

- No, but I can type. - Oh, my goodness.

We have to be very careful, you know?

One of us is gonna be under the car,

and it could be dangerous.

Well let's get the tire first.

Yes.

I don't wanna be under a car

that's gonna fall on me.

I mean, that would put a crimp in the afternoon.

- Can you believe it? - What?

There is no spare.

What do you mean there's no spare?

There is no spare tire!

Paco must've used it and never replaced it.

Mm.

- And you never noticed it? - No.

Well, normally, I don't check the trunk.

- No. - Well, what can we do?

Okay, I'll call the garage,

but it will take forever for them to come here.

So we can walk. I have another car at my house.

We are not far from where I live.

Oh, also, we could hitch a ride.

- All right. - It's that direction.

It's, like, 30 kilometers or so.

It's not very far.

- Thirty... - Twenty miles.

Twenty miles?

I had a great time today.

Me too.

Here.

I, uh, I got you something.

Me? When?

Well when you were browsing, I noticed this,

and I thought you'd like it.

I love it.

It's so beautiful. How sweet of you.

Thank you.

It was fun, though.

Sorry about this. I'm sorry.

Is it safe to leave you with him?

Of course it's safe!

Who are you?

Just a friend.

What do you mean, "is it safe"?

What kind of stupid question is that?

I can drive her back.

Maybe we could both share a cab back to town.

Don't worry. I can drop you, okay?

I was drawing her, and I couldn't resist.

I'm human.

There is nothing more beautiful than a woman

with no clothes on.

And she has a perfect form. Look, look.

I really should be saying toodle-oo.

We-we... we have an arrangement!

- Did she tell you that? - Paco...

Well, basically, um, uh,

we were sightseeing and then we had a flat tire.

There was no spare tire.

Sometimes she thinks she's my moral judge.

Don't you agree?

No, don't-don't-don't... Stop.

Stop. No.

- Don't get him into this. - All right, now...

Excuse me.

Sorry. I'm sorry I said that.

Forgive me.

Forgive me.

Well I'm sorry about that.

It was inexcusable.

Well it's not your fault.

It's okay. Just don't...

don't let it spoil the day.

Excuse me, I... my English is very bad.

Pero, Paco loves you so much. Okay?

Ciao.

Are you gonna be all right?

Yeah.

Sure.

Oh, hi. Uh, Mort, right?

- Right. - Tomás introduced us.

- Yes, exactly. - I'm Gil.

- Hi, hi. - Yeah, hi.

So how's... how's your health?

- How's my health? - Well, yeah.

Weren't you seeing Dr. Rojas?

Oh, yeah. Oh, yes. Much better.

- I'm much better. - Yeah, Joanna is so great.

She's just great.

I know.

But have you ever met her husband?

Oh, yeah. He's a... he's a millstone.

I mean, I just can't believe that she stays with that guy.

I know. You know, he's kind of, um...

he's so crazy.

I mean, you know, he's a wild... you think,

you know, he could pick her up and throw her through a window.

I know. I know.

I mean, she rationalizes staying with him.

I mean, she says that if-if she left him,

he'd be totally lost.

You're a writer, right?

Since when did relationships become rational?

The heart has its reasons.

How did the press conference go,

by the way?

What press conference?

That big press thing this afternoon.

Oh, there was nothing this afternoon.

I mean, unless you mean the thing

with the local government and Philippe.

The Spaniards are initiating a Luis Buñuel Award

to honor filmmakers,

and Philippe's gonna kick it off.

But not this afternoon. That's-that's tonight.

There was no action today.

You should come. It's gonna be a lot of fun.

Are you gonna come to this dinner thing with me?

I mean, we better hurry.

So the press conference went well?

Yeah, it was fine.

I mean, it's, you know, a press conference.

They ask the same questions over and over and over again.

Must've taken all day, with all those journalists.

Yeah, it did.

- You and Philippe? - Uh-huh.

You know, you don't have to come with us

if you don't want to.

I mean, I know you hate these things.

Oh, no. That's okay.

Philippe was being honored with a Buñuel Award.

I went out of respect for Buñuel,

a director I loved.

But my mind was on Joanna.

Talk about picking the wrong men.

I left the dinner

while they were singing Philippe's praises.

I remember my dream vividly.

Dinner was wonderful,

while the truffles were exquisite.

My dear friends,

there is no food greater than the food at San Sebastián.

To the film festival.

And to all the films that make cinema an art.

Yes.

To the European cinema and its golden years.

And to Philippe's film, a work of art

and, let's also hope, a work of commerce.

And...

to Mort's novel,

a work of neither art nor commerce,

as it remains, thus far, unfinished.

A work in no progress.

I predict, if he does finish this novel,

it would be mired with thoughts.

All foreplay, and no orgasm.

Well it's been a wonderful evening

honoring the talent and the genius of Philippe.

Here, here.

And I wanna thank you all for coming.

Wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait.

Don't go. Let's have another nightcap.

And Mort, will you do me a favor

and stop mentally undressing my wife?

I lift my glass. It's been a great festival.

And I have to thank Mort for the use of his wife.

- Here, here. - I seem to have lost my shoe.

Would you a darling and look under the table for it?

You know what I have here?

A hip flask?

Ah!

Why-why do you carry that?

If ever she leave me,

I put it to my head and pull the trigger.

That's a little extreme, isn't it?

Wouldn't a couple of Xanax do the trick?

A man who cannot see himself dying for love

is not a man.

Look at these people,

talking and exchanging trivial opinions

and foolish insincerities.

Let's leave together now,

put our whole complicated life situation behind us

for once and for all and start over.

That's the nicest offer I've ever had.

You can't spend your life a hostage to Paco.

He's impossible to live with.

I've been waiting... waiting all my life

for someone to come and rescue me.

Let's go.

What's wrong?

I can't.

- You can't what? - I can't leave.

I want to go with you, but I c... I just can't.

I'm not sure what you mean.

- See? - That's funny.

I-I don't feel that I can leave.

What's wrong?

Well we're trying

to walk through the door, but, uh, it...

- Just can't. - It doesn't seem possible.

- Just walk through the door. - Uh...

What's going on?

Can't leave.

We're... we're trying to leave, but...

Well I have to go home. I think I left the oven on.

- Huh? What? - Hey!

- Wait, wait. - Mort, wake up.

- No! No! - Hey, hey, hey, hey.

- What? - Wake up.

- You're having a nightmare. - I am?

- Yeah. - What time is it?

Jesus. 4:00 a.m.?

- Where have you been? - I was dancing.

- At 4:00 a.m.? - Mm.

With who? Let me guess.

With Philippe. He's a divine dancer.

You smell from diluted ethanol.

"Diluted ethanol."

Yeah, I'm a little drunk.

I've had a couple of vodkas.

So, you know,

this is the perfect time to have this conversation...

uh, yes, I'm a little drunk,

and so I have the courage of the vodka.

Listen.

Mort, I think we should break up.

What do you mean?

Come on.

It's like we've been hanging on the side of a sinking ship.

It...

our marriage doomed.

We both know it.

It just... it's gonna take one of us to make the first move.

Have you been sleeping with Philippe?

Never.

Except once.

Well, twice.

You know, if you count the stuck elevator and...

I mean, if we're gonna be honest,

you know, three times.

The beach, that...

you know, but the most important thing is

is that I think that we lay all of our cards on the table.

How many cards do you have? 52?

Listen, I'm not a cheater, Mort.

Okay?

I mean, the thought that I was a married woman

almost ruined all the sex for me.

I think you're probably right to...

call a halt

to what obviously has become a kind of charade.

But, um...

I'm upset.

Yeah.

It's upsetting.

I mean, we've been together for so long.

And it's just... it's hard, you know,

when you get used to someone,

even though it's kind of obvious

that this has been over for a long time.

We just don't share anything anymore, right?

And lately,

it just seems like we get on each other's nerves

at the drop of a hat and...

I don't know.

I'm sure it was amazing with Philippe.

Well, you know,

I mean, with us, there's just no surprises,

and... with Philippe,

God, it was just like...

I just felt like a woman again.

You know, just full of, like, passion and lust

and kind of a feral animal,

just willing to try and do anything.

Well so much for the missionary position.

Mm.

I really think it's better that,

when we get back...

you know, that I move out.

Well it's a big apartment.

It'll be empty without you.

I'm not gonna take the furniture, you know?

I'm just gonna take my books and-and my clothes.

Philippe's got a place. So...

I'll move in with him.

Oh, you know, I am gonna wanna keep

that Andy Warhol silk screen

and that little Rauschenberg print.

But I want you to keep that caricature

that the guy made for us in Washington Square Park.

"Orange juice for one."

Larry Hart got it right.

No matter how screwed up and unpleasant

our marriage had become,

you don't just wash away a relationship

that once had such promise

without a little melancholy.

What are you doing? Taxi. T for taxi.

Oh, hi, Mort.

I'm so sorry.

Do you happen to have Dr. Rojas's home phone?

I do. Are-are you not feeling well?

Not perfect.

Oh, I'm very sorry.

Does anybody have a pen?

You know, I gotta say,

I'm... I feel so sad that the festival's ending.

You know, it's just been so great here.

I just love it.

Yes.

It's been a very enlightening experience.

There you go, and I hope you feel better.

Thank you.

Sí?

Hi. It's Mort.

Oh, hi. Hi, Mort.

In case you were wondering,

I got your number from Gil Brenner.

I don't want to bother you at home,

but I just wanted to make sure you're okay.

Yes, I'm fine.

How about you?

Me?

I'm okay.

I just want to say I had a very nice time yesterday.

And I did, too.

I'm sorry it had to end that way.

Yes, well-well, that-that's okay.

Um...

are you free today?

I'm just gonna stay home

and-and get some things done around the house.

Catch up.

That's important.

Um, I'm a bit of a neat freak myself.

Well...

the festival is just about over,

and I'll be heading back to New York.

Wow. I'm-I'm jealous.

Throw a penny in the sailboat pond for me.

Right.

And I-I-I so enjoyed

seeing all those sights that you showed me.

The time passes so amazingly quickly here.

Yes.

I mean, it's...

it's hard to believe it's fall already.

Fall's my favorite time of year.

Autumn in Paris.

But you're feeling okay?

No reflux? No...

No bumps? No ringing in the ears?

I just love the way you say, "reflux."

Are you sure you don't have any free time today?

Mm. No.

I don't think it would be a great idea.

No, I understand.

Okay.

Well if you ever wanna have a hamburger

at the Minetta Tavern...

Who knows?

So, uh...

take care.

Bye.

I was feeling low and tired

from my encounter with Sue,

which left me sleepless.

Whenever I get depressed,

I always think

of my parents' friend Rose Budnick.

She finally gave up.

Why are you here?

To have our final chess game.

I don't have a chess set.

I never leave home without mine!

Why are you doing this?

To give you a chance to get to know me.

To come to terms with me.

I'll never come to terms with you.

Then you'll never be able to relax and enjoy your life.

Why are you suddenly being so kind?

You're usually ruthless.

I'm not ruthless. I'm indifferent.

I just hate to see a poor schmuck ruin his life

over the inevitable.

Well the way I feel this morning,

you could take me right now for all I care.

What's this morning?

Well I've had a chance to look at my life

over the last few weeks,

and...

I realize I've made a lot of bad decisions.

Like what?

Like maybe I really was a snob,

the sort of pedantic ass who puts people off

with my so-called highbrow taste.

All I know is my wife and I have split

and my life has come up empty.

Your life isn't empty. It's meaningless.

Don't confuse the two.

It has no meaning for everybody,

but that doesn't mean it has to be empty.

You're a human being. You can make it full.

How?

There's work, family, love,

the usual bullshit.

But it's reasonably effective.

Look, even if you strike out, trying is good for you.

Did you ever read Sisyphus, the Camus thing?

Yes, and it gave me a bad dream.

I mean,

I'm pushing that rock up the hill over and over,

and it keeps falling back.

And then I finally get the rock up to the top of the hill,

and then what the hell do I have?

A rock on a hill.

You're starting to get me depressed.

Should I just chuck my book

and go back to teaching movies?

I would.

Unless you want to end up with 500 pages

of turgid whining.

And maybe I'm just not a book writer.

Maybe I'm a book reader, a person who likes to think,

a teacher.

My movie class was fun,

only...

maybe I was a little too rigid in my approach.

I have to go.

I got a million house calls to make.

No, wait! Wait!

Well don't worry.

I'll be back one day,

and then you'll think it's too soon.

You'll be back? When?

Depends. Do you smoke?

No.

Oh.

The trick is to eat lots of fruits and vegetables

and lay off the saturated fats.

Oh, I do. I'm very careful.

Good, good.

Make sure to exercise.

It doesn't have to be intense as long as it's every day.

You're fading out.

No processed foods,

and don't forget your colonoscopy.

So it was quite a festival.

I finished with a marriage that was running on empty

and I had time to think about myself

and examine my own life.

And then there was Joanna,

a lovely dream that didn't quite come true,

but, for a while there, it got my adrenaline going.

So maybe Sisyphus was right.

♪ When skies Are cloudy and gray ♪

♪ They're only gray For a day ♪

♪ So wrap your troubles In dreams ♪

♪ And dream Your troubles away ♪

♪ Till that sunshine Peeps through ♪

♪ There's only One thing to do ♪

♪ Just wrap your troubles In dreams ♪

♪ And dream Your troubles away ♪

♪ Castles may tumble ♪

♪ Fate, after all ♪

♪ Life's really funny That way ♪

♪ No need to grumble... ♪

So...

do you have anything to say to me

after everything that I've told you?

♪ Just remember That sunshine ♪

♪ Always follows the rain ♪

♪ Come on and wrap Your troubles in dreams ♪

♪ And dream Our troubles away ♪

Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull