Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,959 --> 00:00:04,963
[bombastic fanfare]
2
00:00:18,685 --> 00:00:23,690
[retro synth fanfare]
3
00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:38,872
[enthusiastic, goofy fanfare]
4
00:00:50,842 --> 00:00:55,889
[fanfare becomes more energetic]
5
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:09,570
[increasingly absurd
and repetitive fanfare]
6
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:37,097
[fanfare becomes more manic and intense]
7
00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:50,110
[fanfare crescendos]
8
00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:06,209
[ominous music with Gregorian chanting]
9
00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,932
[other worldly breathing]
10
00:02:22,351 --> 00:02:24,102
[other worldly breathing]
11
00:02:33,111 --> 00:02:37,074
[radio chatter]
12
00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:04,768
[radio chatter]
13
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:30,043
[sludge metal plays on stereo]
14
00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:38,927
[more sludge metal plays on stereo]
15
00:03:39,136 --> 00:03:42,597
[cell phone vibrates]
16
00:03:49,938 --> 00:03:52,357
[riffling through trash]
17
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:54,808
[woman]
I'm really hoping you pull through...
18
00:03:54,878 --> 00:03:56,458
...on Jayden's
birthday surprise this year.
19
00:03:56,528 --> 00:03:59,322
Yeah, babe, I'm working on it.
20
00:03:59,531 --> 00:04:00,837
[woman] Jayden's counting on you.
21
00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:03,201
Listen, tell Jayden
his birthday surprise is in the bag.
22
00:04:03,452 --> 00:04:04,619
I'm wrapping it as we speak.
23
00:04:04,828 --> 00:04:07,135
[woman] He can't have another
disappointment on his birthday.
24
00:04:07,205 --> 00:04:07,831
[man] It's taken care of.
25
00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:10,597
[woman] You're going to have to do
better than last year's present.
26
00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,753
As in absolutely no clowns.
27
00:04:12,961 --> 00:04:13,795
Can you relax?
28
00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:16,013
[woman] And no RC cars.
I read on goop about...
29
00:04:16,083 --> 00:04:18,717
...the latest lithium batteries
causing infertility in children.
30
00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:19,634
[man] Tell little Jadeite
31
00:04:19,843 --> 00:04:22,846
his birthday surprise is going to be
super cool and mysterious.
32
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:24,319
He's going to love it, I promise.
33
00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:25,862
[woman]
Oh, can you pick up some Baton Rouge
34
00:04:25,932 --> 00:04:28,935
buff-links from Beef man's
for Jayden's birthday surprise dinner?
35
00:04:29,186 --> 00:04:32,564
Uh, I got gross trash on my shoe.
36
00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:35,692
Buff-links, check.
37
00:04:35,901 --> 00:04:38,069
[woman] Baton Rouge buff-links.
38
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:40,322
He likes the ghost pepper flakes
that those have.
39
00:04:40,530 --> 00:04:41,707
[man] If Jayden wants
to blow out his butthole,
40
00:04:41,777 --> 00:04:42,879
that's his business.
41
00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,326
I'll get him the buff-links.
42
00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:46,454
Jayden's birthday's gonna go off
without a hitch.
43
00:04:46,578 --> 00:04:47,578
[clicks off phone]
44
00:04:48,205 --> 00:04:50,248
Without a hitch you fucking bitch.
45
00:04:53,210 --> 00:04:53,794
[doorway bell dings]
46
00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:55,962
[man] Hey, what's up?
47
00:04:56,171 --> 00:04:58,715
This place is, uh...
48
00:04:58,924 --> 00:05:01,927
this place is kind of weird.
49
00:05:02,761 --> 00:05:06,556
Hey, um,
I'm looking for toys for my son.
50
00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:08,325
Thought I'd pick him up something at...
51
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:09,059
[man] What is this place?
52
00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:10,977
Benny's Desert Fast Trip.
53
00:05:11,186 --> 00:05:12,562
[man] Yeah. What's that all about?
54
00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:14,648
I guess it's like a farting butt.
55
00:05:14,856 --> 00:05:19,653
And, like, this cactus guy over here is,
like, not liking the smell or something.
56
00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:21,780
[man] Toys.
57
00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:23,406
You got any?
58
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,951
Toys like for kids and stuff?
59
00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:27,257
[man] My kid's birthday tomorrow.
60
00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:29,222
I'd already gotten this big
freaking RC truck...
61
00:05:29,292 --> 00:05:30,761
...with lights and all sorts of things.
62
00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:31,414
But his mom read about
63
00:05:31,623 --> 00:05:33,208
some kid getting cancer from batteries.
64
00:05:33,416 --> 00:05:34,890
And now she wants me to send it back.
65
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:35,502
[cashier] Yeah, cancer.
66
00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:37,796
That looks like,
that's a really tough one.
67
00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:39,923
But, you totally came
to the right place,
68
00:05:40,131 --> 00:05:42,133
cause we got lots of stuff for that,
actually.
69
00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:45,011
Like this, will just totally cure it.
70
00:05:45,220 --> 00:05:46,860
But if you really have
a little more money,
71
00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:48,600
you could spring for one
of the bracelets over there.
72
00:05:48,670 --> 00:05:50,506
- They're like...
- [man] I need to find my kid a new toy,
73
00:05:50,576 --> 00:05:52,936
- pronto.
- [cashier] Toys.
74
00:05:53,144 --> 00:05:53,728
Yeah.
75
00:05:53,937 --> 00:05:56,189
Like, we got some of that stuff.
76
00:05:56,398 --> 00:05:57,107
Like, kids like,
77
00:05:57,315 --> 00:05:58,441
Like animal bones.
78
00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:02,070
Like pogs, guns, like, squish men.
79
00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:04,990
Back over there.
80
00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:07,659
[grunge music plays from headphones]
81
00:06:19,296 --> 00:06:23,091
[ominous music with Gregorian chanting]
82
00:06:29,222 --> 00:06:31,391
- [steam hiss]
- [other worldly moans]
83
00:06:41,484 --> 00:06:43,653
[moans continue]
84
00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:46,448
[squelching pumping]
85
00:06:55,665 --> 00:06:57,208
[viscid squish]
86
00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:59,377
[orgasmic ethereal moan]
87
00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:01,212
[quickening rhythmic clashes]
88
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,421
[bubbling breach]
89
00:07:02,631 --> 00:07:03,631
[squelch]
90
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,014
[bubbling and moist jostling]
91
00:07:11,222 --> 00:07:13,975
[man] What in the hell is this thing?
92
00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:15,769
[sweeping]
93
00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:17,103
Oh yeah, that's our Hoagie.
94
00:07:17,312 --> 00:07:21,566
It's sort of like,
maybe an alien or like a troll, I guess.
95
00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:22,775
What's its deal?
96
00:07:22,901 --> 00:07:24,986
Are you talking about Hoagie?
97
00:07:25,195 --> 00:07:26,696
Yes, Hoagie.
98
00:07:26,905 --> 00:07:27,489
What is it?
99
00:07:27,697 --> 00:07:29,824
More of a who actually than a what.
100
00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:31,576
At least that's what the legend says.
101
00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:32,785
This I gotta hear.
102
00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:35,330
[cashier] Well, so, like,
ever since I started working here,
103
00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:37,290
it's just like sitting on the shelf.
104
00:07:37,499 --> 00:07:41,252
Kind of like,
in this weird cocoon, pulsating
105
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:44,464
and, like, kind of hibernating,
I guess, but, like,
106
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:48,259
the word is, it was like,
found a really, really
107
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:51,096
hell a long ass time ago.
108
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:54,724
[cashier]
There were these, like, dirty, super
109
00:07:54,933 --> 00:07:58,436
nasty, grody ass, dirty miner guys.
110
00:07:59,396 --> 00:08:03,149
This was when people, like,
pooped in those little wooden houses.
111
00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:06,152
Like in big gross holes.
112
00:08:06,361 --> 00:08:09,030
They would wear the same clothes
113
00:08:09,239 --> 00:08:12,242
all the time,
like every day and every night.
114
00:08:13,076 --> 00:08:15,704
If you were some person
who was like a lady or a
115
00:08:15,912 --> 00:08:17,455
woman or whatever,
116
00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:21,418
you just sort of scraped beans
around in an old buckets, like...
117
00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:23,293
Or something.
118
00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:25,672
So they got their miner shovels
and stuff.
119
00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:28,675
And started doing their rock and,
like, dirt digging and stuff.
120
00:08:28,883 --> 00:08:32,178
In like a total full-on,
like, cave I guess.
121
00:08:32,387 --> 00:08:34,097
And it was like really hard.
122
00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:37,559
[steam hissing]
[squelching]
123
00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:40,103
[slime dripping]
124
00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:43,189
What the shit?
125
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:46,198
[cashier] That's when Pork Chop,
like, one of the crusty old miner guys
126
00:08:46,317 --> 00:08:48,737
He like saw something really crazy.
127
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:50,780
That's when he... it all started.
128
00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:53,074
I guess.
129
00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:55,368
[grunts]
130
00:08:56,244 --> 00:08:58,997
[excited laughter]
131
00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:01,249
Spicy Mike!
132
00:09:01,458 --> 00:09:02,667
Getcher ass over here!
133
00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:04,252
Hey man!
134
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,171
Oh, let me look at that thing. Oh,
135
00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:07,464
[Pork Chop] Hell no.
136
00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:08,965
[Spicy Mike] Damn it Pork Chop!
137
00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:11,217
[Pork Chop] What the...
138
00:09:11,426 --> 00:09:13,470
Where'd that weird
piece of meat come from?
139
00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:17,724
[Spicy Mike] This lick-spittle Judas
won't split up that damn ostrich egg!
140
00:09:17,932 --> 00:09:19,404
[Pork Chop]
This is a thing of wonderment...
141
00:09:19,474 --> 00:09:20,935
...and a fit to be worshipped!
142
00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:22,325
[Spicy Mike] Ah to hell with that!
143
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:25,398
Now you crack that egg
or I'll crack your skull.
144
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:26,941
[metal thud]
145
00:09:28,109 --> 00:09:29,486
[woman] Give him hell Spicy Mike!
146
00:09:29,694 --> 00:09:31,863
[woman] Get on your feet you peckerwood!
147
00:09:34,199 --> 00:09:36,534
[woman] Don't lie there like a coward.
148
00:09:36,951 --> 00:09:37,994
[woman] Give him a punch!
149
00:09:38,912 --> 00:09:42,040
[woman] I'm gonna wear his guts
like a feather boa!
150
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:43,749
[bone snap]
151
00:09:46,211 --> 00:09:46,753
[agonized grunt]
152
00:09:46,961 --> 00:09:47,961
[hammer click]
153
00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:48,838
[gunshot]
154
00:09:49,047 --> 00:09:50,047
[Pork Chop] Ahhh!
155
00:09:50,215 --> 00:09:54,219
[cashier] So they, like,
totally shot Pork Chop to get the egg.
156
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:58,348
And like, Spicy Mike went full
serial killer psycho on him.
157
00:09:58,556 --> 00:10:00,892
He stabbed him like, a million times.
158
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:02,490
- [woman] Stab him again!
- [Spicy Mike] Die!
159
00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:08,274
[woman] Give him hell Spicy Mike!
C'mon! Go give him hell!
160
00:10:09,192 --> 00:10:11,569
[cashier] Pork Chop wasn't dead.
161
00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:14,697
[Spicy Mike] Jeepers creepers!
162
00:10:14,906 --> 00:10:18,118
[cashier] Hoagie's power was,
like, calling to him.
163
00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:23,039
[grunting]
[ethereal moans]
164
00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:26,668
[flesh stretching]
165
00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:27,669
[flesh ripping]
166
00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:29,921
[grunting]
167
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:33,133
[cashier] Then they ripped him in half.
168
00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:36,845
[Spicy Mike] He's finally dead.
169
00:10:37,512 --> 00:10:39,722
[cashier] And after that,
his dead body farted.
170
00:10:39,931 --> 00:10:42,308
Like, the butt part, I guess.
[corpse fart]
171
00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:43,309
[cashier] Pretty normal.
172
00:10:43,518 --> 00:10:46,521
[Spicy Mike] Ahhh!
173
00:10:47,689 --> 00:10:48,731
[meaty squelch]
174
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:51,568
[Spicy Mike] Why won't you die?!
175
00:10:51,776 --> 00:10:52,776
[Pork Chop] Gaaahhhh!
176
00:10:52,944 --> 00:10:54,112
[skull splintering thud]
177
00:10:55,738 --> 00:10:58,116
[cashier] Then he was definitely dead.
178
00:10:58,324 --> 00:11:00,204
[Spicy Mike]
Now I'm gonna eat this fuckin' egg!
179
00:11:00,285 --> 00:11:03,788
[cashier] And Spicy Mike
got the egg he so desired.
180
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:04,998
[meaty squelching]
181
00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:08,793
Oh my god!
182
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:13,269
[cashier] And that ended up being
183
00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:14,507
Spicy Mike MacGruder
184
00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:16,731
He was, like,
the founder and the mayor of this town.
185
00:11:16,801 --> 00:11:19,804
He's, like, super famous and,
like, really important.
186
00:11:20,305 --> 00:11:22,140
So what's Hoagie then?
187
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:23,909
[cashier]
Nobody really knows about Hoagie,
188
00:11:23,979 --> 00:11:25,560
but I guess he sort of, like,
189
00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:30,214
makes all your wishes and, like,
fantasies into reality and stuff.
190
00:11:30,481 --> 00:11:31,504
And like,
191
00:11:31,574 --> 00:11:36,029
for some people that can be like heaven,
but for other people it's...
192
00:11:36,988 --> 00:11:37,530
hell.
193
00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:40,074
Well, I think Jayden
would really like something like this.
194
00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:41,910
He's into all sorts of weird shit.
195
00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:42,785
I'll take it.
196
00:11:42,994 --> 00:11:45,580
Well, my boss said to like,
197
00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:48,583
never, ever, ever, ever sell Hoagie.
198
00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:53,379
He says that his powers
are too great and it's too dangerous.
199
00:11:53,588 --> 00:11:56,591
And, like, man is not ready
for these forces to be unleashed
200
00:11:56,799 --> 00:11:59,844
upon the world and blah,
blah, blah, blah.
201
00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:05,975
But if you were to, like, drop,
like 200 dollars out of your wallet,
202
00:12:06,184 --> 00:12:09,854
like, on this floor,
I would like totally have to go
203
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:13,066
take a giant shit.
204
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,110
[approaching footsteps]
205
00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:17,319
[heavy thud]
206
00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:21,699
[sinister music]
207
00:12:28,957 --> 00:12:32,085
[droning music]
[children celebrating]
208
00:12:32,293 --> 00:12:35,296
[confetti clattering]
209
00:12:42,679 --> 00:12:45,682
[muffled revelry]
210
00:12:59,070 --> 00:13:00,571
[scooting trash]
211
00:13:02,115 --> 00:13:02,865
[splat]
212
00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:04,617
[joystick clicking]
213
00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:06,744
[muffled game audio]
214
00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:09,330
[game narrator] Here's your next victim.
215
00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:11,930
- [game narrator] Show no mercy.
- [npc] The heck's going on in here?
216
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,085
[game narrator] Now, murder him.
217
00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:16,587
What is this place?
218
00:13:17,964 --> 00:13:20,758
[game narrator] Hahaha! Nice kill!
219
00:13:21,009 --> 00:13:23,428
[joystick clicking]
220
00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:27,223
[game narrator] Yes! 50 points!
221
00:13:27,432 --> 00:13:28,141
Victory!
222
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,643
[ad] That's the American man's dream.
223
00:13:30,852 --> 00:13:33,646
Hi, I'm David Michael O'Malley,
224
00:13:33,855 --> 00:13:36,149
let me show you
what David Michael O'Malley's
225
00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:38,943
real estate team has in store.
226
00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:41,863
You're gonna absolutely
love this inventory.
227
00:13:42,905 --> 00:13:44,025
I hope you packed some extra
228
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:47,869
diapers, boys and girls,
because you are gonna shit your pants
229
00:13:48,077 --> 00:13:49,203
when you see this house.
230
00:13:49,454 --> 00:13:51,998
No thanks David Michael O'Malley,
no sale.
231
00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:54,000
[click] I've already got my dream home.
232
00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:56,294
[man] Isn't that right Jayden?
233
00:13:56,711 --> 00:13:57,711
Jayden.
234
00:13:57,920 --> 00:13:58,920
Whatever, Dad.
235
00:13:59,088 --> 00:14:00,381
[man] Alright birthday boy,
236
00:14:00,590 --> 00:14:01,424
it's time for bed.
237
00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:03,760
[ominous music]
[old parchment pages turning]
238
00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:05,845
[ethereal moans]
239
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:10,266
[ethereal moans]
[dripping]
240
00:14:13,227 --> 00:14:16,314
[moist squelching]
241
00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:22,278
[ominous music]
242
00:14:23,321 --> 00:14:25,114
[moist squelching]
243
00:14:26,199 --> 00:14:27,992
[ghostly moan]
244
00:14:28,951 --> 00:14:30,745
[drippy squelch]
245
00:14:35,583 --> 00:14:37,377
[moaning intensifies]
246
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:49,013
[door creaks]
247
00:14:53,684 --> 00:14:56,687
[ethereal moan]
248
00:15:07,115 --> 00:15:08,825
[penetrative squelch]
[man] Ungh!
249
00:15:09,033 --> 00:15:11,327
[grunting]
250
00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:15,915
[wet slapping and squelching]
251
00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:19,669
[ominous music intensifies]
252
00:15:21,045 --> 00:15:23,339
[grunting]
253
00:15:24,048 --> 00:15:25,174
[demonic growl]
254
00:15:25,383 --> 00:15:27,677
[explosive squishy ejection]
255
00:15:28,344 --> 00:15:30,638
[demon growl]
256
00:15:31,305 --> 00:15:32,305
[squish]
257
00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:39,480
[music intensifies]
258
00:15:45,695 --> 00:15:47,780
[demon growl]
259
00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:50,450
[possessed man] Hi honey.
260
00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:51,284
Gaahh!
261
00:15:51,492 --> 00:15:52,492
[woman] Ahhh!
262
00:15:52,660 --> 00:15:53,244
[squelch]
263
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:53,995
[woman] Ugh!
264
00:15:54,412 --> 00:15:55,412
[woman] Ahhh!
265
00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:00,793
[dryer hums]
266
00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:02,794
[metal clang]
267
00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:05,377
[cap unscrews and clatters]
268
00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:07,507
[chugging and splashing]
269
00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:10,553
[Jayden] Dad?
270
00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:13,473
Are you out here?
271
00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:15,016
[gurgling]
272
00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:19,639
[Jayden] What are you doing?
273
00:16:21,898 --> 00:16:24,400
[possessed man] Jayden, you're mine.
274
00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:25,610
[Jayden] Dad! No!
275
00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:26,818
[chop]
[squelch]
276
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:32,742
[clattering head]
277
00:16:33,701 --> 00:16:35,703
[ghostly Jayden] Dad! No!
278
00:16:35,912 --> 00:16:40,708
[morning alarm sounding]
279
00:16:40,917 --> 00:16:41,751
[man] Jayden?
280
00:16:41,959 --> 00:16:43,711
[ghostly Jayden] Daddy, it's so dark.
281
00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:45,671
Hey, Jayden.
282
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,965
[heartbeat]
283
00:16:48,216 --> 00:16:49,926
[ghostly Jayden] I'm cold daddy.
284
00:16:50,134 --> 00:16:51,636
I'm so cold.
285
00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:54,805
[music sting]
No!
286
00:16:55,139 --> 00:16:57,183
[ghostly Jayden] Help me daddy.
287
00:16:58,601 --> 00:16:59,644
Daddy!
288
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:00,937
Why'd you kill me daddy?
289
00:17:01,145 --> 00:17:02,396
[droning music]
290
00:17:02,605 --> 00:17:03,605
[wet thud]
291
00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:04,690
[thud]
292
00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:06,192
[latching]
293
00:17:06,984 --> 00:17:08,069
[chains rattling]
294
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:09,570
[steam hisses]
295
00:17:10,404 --> 00:17:12,490
[dragging and shuffling]
296
00:17:13,241 --> 00:17:14,534
[ghostly moans]
297
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,323
[chains clatter]
[dull thud]
298
00:17:16,869 --> 00:17:17,954
[thump]
299
00:17:18,162 --> 00:17:19,455
[digging]
300
00:17:25,962 --> 00:17:27,255
[rattle]
301
00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:35,721
[racking]
302
00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:40,601
[moans intensify]
303
00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:42,812
[music intensifies]
304
00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:50,695
Ahhh!
305
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:52,697
Ahhhhhhh!
306
00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:54,031
[blast]
[meaty squelch]
307
00:17:54,282 --> 00:17:56,367
[propulsive music]
308
00:17:56,701 --> 00:17:58,786
[wet squishing]
[rushing wind]
309
00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:04,375
[squelching]
310
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,669
[heartbeat]
311
00:18:11,382 --> 00:18:13,467
[heartbeat]
312
00:18:18,472 --> 00:18:20,558
[meaty squishing]
313
00:18:26,897 --> 00:18:28,566
[muffled pumping]
314
00:18:30,318 --> 00:18:31,861
[heartbeat]
315
00:18:32,069 --> 00:18:33,446
[bubbling]
316
00:18:33,654 --> 00:18:35,197
[hissing vapors]
317
00:18:35,406 --> 00:18:37,074
[pumping]
318
00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:38,826
[squishy rip]
[wet breathing]
319
00:18:42,246 --> 00:18:43,831
[bubbling and pumping]
320
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,541
[flowing liquid]
321
00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:47,835
[rhythmic breathing]
322
00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:54,467
[music continues]
323
00:19:00,056 --> 00:19:02,600
[burbling brook]
324
00:19:12,234 --> 00:19:14,320
[chirping birds]
325
00:19:21,118 --> 00:19:23,204
[shuffling boxes]
326
00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:26,749
[children laughing]
327
00:19:30,586 --> 00:19:31,796
[children] It's fun!
328
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:32,755
[laughter]
329
00:19:32,963 --> 00:19:34,632
Oh, yeah.
330
00:19:42,556 --> 00:19:44,225
[birds chirping]
331
00:19:51,315 --> 00:19:52,983
[water gently pouring]
332
00:19:55,736 --> 00:19:56,362
[cat meows loudly]
333
00:19:56,570 --> 00:19:57,697
Giorgio!
334
00:19:57,905 --> 00:20:00,157
You startled me, you little brat!
335
00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:01,450
Giorgio...
336
00:20:01,659 --> 00:20:02,243
[cat hissing]
337
00:20:02,451 --> 00:20:03,911
[ominous music]
338
00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:08,623
Yah!
339
00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:09,749
Jesus Christ,
340
00:20:09,917 --> 00:20:11,794
you fucking kids
scared the shit out of me.
341
00:20:12,002 --> 00:20:14,255
Hi, dad.
342
00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:17,425
I love you beautiful kids so much.
343
00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:18,634
You're everything to me.
344
00:20:28,185 --> 00:20:31,188
[children giggle]
345
00:20:31,814 --> 00:20:33,079
[man] Mr. O'Malley, is that you?
346
00:20:33,149 --> 00:20:34,163
Can you even hear me, bro?
347
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:35,985
You know I don't repeat myself.
348
00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:37,193
[Duncan] I hear you now.
349
00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:39,210
I got these new Raycons,
and they're sort of tricky.
350
00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:43,993
Raycons is donkey shits,
Raycons suck donkey dicks.
351
00:20:44,702 --> 00:20:46,537
Nobody on my team uses those.
352
00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:48,344
[Duncan] Yes sir. They suck, I admit it.
353
00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:48,831
They suck.
354
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:51,292
That's one of the mistakes
that Linda made.
355
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:52,168
[Duncan] Affirmative.
356
00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:55,171
Sure thing boss,
I'll shit-can these things ASAP.
357
00:20:55,379 --> 00:20:58,382
This butthead is way
the fuck out in the boonies.
358
00:20:58,591 --> 00:20:59,980
[Duncan]
This the tear-down on Blackwell Street?
359
00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:03,387
Nah. Some pencil-neck geek
named Brendan Bean.
360
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:04,221
[Duncan] That name sucks.
361
00:21:04,472 --> 00:21:05,778
[O'Malley] I know that name sucks.
362
00:21:05,848 --> 00:21:07,349
He moved like, three weeks ago.
363
00:21:07,558 --> 00:21:09,894
I'm a little bit late
bringing his shitty-ass family
364
00:21:10,102 --> 00:21:12,396
his welcome to the neighborhood
bundt cake.
365
00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:13,773
Hope it's not too dry.
366
00:21:13,981 --> 00:21:15,733
[Duncan] Fuck yeah, dude. You rule.
367
00:21:16,066 --> 00:21:17,066
[children laughing]
368
00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:18,276
[girl] Hey, wait up!
369
00:21:18,569 --> 00:21:19,653
[children] Whoa!
370
00:21:22,490 --> 00:21:23,574
[boy] An axe!
371
00:21:23,783 --> 00:21:25,242
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Get it Aiden!
372
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:26,619
[metal twang]
373
00:21:26,827 --> 00:21:28,078
[girl] Yeah!
374
00:21:28,579 --> 00:21:29,830
Tear it up!
375
00:21:30,206 --> 00:21:30,790
[wood splinters]
376
00:21:30,998 --> 00:21:31,707
[creaking lid]
[squelching]
377
00:21:31,916 --> 00:21:33,209
[children] Ewww!
378
00:21:33,417 --> 00:21:35,544
[Aiden] It looks like a lard omelette!
379
00:21:35,753 --> 00:21:37,922
[girl] It looks like a puke sandwich!
380
00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:39,130
[ethereal moan]
381
00:21:40,591 --> 00:21:41,759
[tires on asphalt]
382
00:21:46,722 --> 00:21:49,600
Lame fucking cake is the least
I could do for this poor boner.
383
00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:50,267
[Duncan] Yes!
384
00:21:50,518 --> 00:21:52,783
[O'Malley] Doesn't even know
he moved into the splatter house.
385
00:21:52,853 --> 00:21:55,815
Made him think he got the come-up
of the century. Psyche!
386
00:21:56,023 --> 00:21:56,816
[Duncan] Oh, snap.
387
00:21:57,024 --> 00:21:59,026
You saddled this loser
with the murder house?
388
00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:01,821
[O'Malley] Last owner straight up
murderized his whole family.
389
00:22:02,029 --> 00:22:04,031
Cops found his kid's head
on a silver platter.
390
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:05,699
[Duncan] Dude, that's awesome!
391
00:22:05,908 --> 00:22:07,785
I heard he killed his wife and shit too.
392
00:22:07,993 --> 00:22:09,161
Lopped her all up!
393
00:22:09,370 --> 00:22:10,663
Chopped up his wife,
394
00:22:10,871 --> 00:22:11,871
chopped up his kid,
395
00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:13,499
blew his own brains out.
396
00:22:13,707 --> 00:22:14,208
That's awesome.
397
00:22:14,416 --> 00:22:16,293
Don't be so goddamn cavalier!
398
00:22:16,544 --> 00:22:17,584
[Duncan] I'm really sorry.
399
00:22:17,670 --> 00:22:20,311
I don't give a rat's ass
what you say on your own time!
400
00:22:20,381 --> 00:22:22,438
- [Duncan] Yeah boss...
- [O'Malley] But if you're on my team,
401
00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:23,564
you better have some respect.
402
00:22:23,634 --> 00:22:25,024
- [Duncan] Yep.
- [O'Malley] Respect for me.
403
00:22:25,094 --> 00:22:25,553
[Duncan] I do.
404
00:22:25,761 --> 00:22:27,888
[O'Malley]
And respect for dead bodies and stuff.
405
00:22:28,097 --> 00:22:29,515
[Duncan] I will. For sure.
406
00:22:29,723 --> 00:22:32,101
- Linda said the same shit, dude.
- [Duncan] Sorry.
407
00:22:32,309 --> 00:22:34,200
- You better watch your attitude.
- [Duncan] I will...
408
00:22:34,270 --> 00:22:35,326
- Alright bro.
- [Duncan] Yeah boss.
409
00:22:35,396 --> 00:22:36,730
Time to work my magic.
410
00:22:36,939 --> 00:22:38,858
Gotta suck the last dick of the day.
411
00:22:39,066 --> 00:22:40,206
[Duncan] Later, Mr. O'Malley,
412
00:22:40,276 --> 00:22:41,665
when you get back
I have all your stuff that you...
413
00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:42,735
[phone clicks off]
414
00:22:44,154 --> 00:22:45,573
[Aiden] What is this!?
415
00:22:45,781 --> 00:22:46,866
Ewww!
416
00:22:47,283 --> 00:22:47,825
[groans in disgust]
417
00:22:48,033 --> 00:22:49,952
[Aiden] Hey, check it out.
418
00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:51,328
[straining]
[fleshy squelch]
419
00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:52,705
[Aiden] Check it out!
420
00:22:53,455 --> 00:22:54,455
[gooey squishing]
421
00:22:55,165 --> 00:22:56,165
Cool.
422
00:22:56,250 --> 00:22:56,834
[fart]
423
00:22:57,042 --> 00:22:57,334
Ewww!
424
00:22:57,543 --> 00:22:59,670
- That fart stinks!
- [Aiden] Gross!
425
00:23:01,297 --> 00:23:02,297
[lid clatters]
426
00:23:02,423 --> 00:23:03,423
[squeaking bundt]
427
00:23:07,303 --> 00:23:08,303
[door shutting]
428
00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:09,179
[door slams]
[car alarm arms]
429
00:23:09,388 --> 00:23:11,849
Mr. O'Malley, what a pleasant surprise.
430
00:23:12,057 --> 00:23:13,350
It's always a pleasure, Brendan.
431
00:23:13,601 --> 00:23:14,643
Welcome to my house.
432
00:23:14,852 --> 00:23:15,644
My home.
433
00:23:15,853 --> 00:23:19,023
I brought you
this freshly baked bundt cake.
434
00:23:19,273 --> 00:23:20,273
Mmmmmm.
435
00:23:20,608 --> 00:23:22,151
Looks and smells divine.
436
00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:23,736
A bundt for the Beans.
437
00:23:23,944 --> 00:23:25,154
Absolute divinity.
438
00:23:25,362 --> 00:23:30,034
[children laughing]
[ominous Latin chanting]
439
00:23:30,242 --> 00:23:30,868
As you can see,
440
00:23:31,076 --> 00:23:34,204
April and I have been hard at work
getting things settled.
441
00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:36,999
I still can't believe this place, David.
442
00:23:37,207 --> 00:23:39,293
Can I call you David?
[phone buttons clicking]
443
00:23:39,501 --> 00:23:43,213
This yard, the fruited trees,
fully fruited.
444
00:23:43,422 --> 00:23:46,425
They're swelling with fruit.
And it's all at an amazing price.
445
00:23:46,967 --> 00:23:48,844
I'm like, are you effing kidding me?
446
00:23:49,053 --> 00:23:51,055
Like, are you fucking kidding me?
447
00:23:51,263 --> 00:23:52,890
Like, what's the catch?
448
00:23:53,098 --> 00:23:55,100
But there is no catch.
449
00:23:55,309 --> 00:23:57,227
That's the catch. There is no catch.
450
00:23:57,436 --> 00:23:58,187
It's all for real.
451
00:23:58,395 --> 00:23:59,563
Right, honey?
452
00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:01,231
Yeah. Brendan.
[phone dings]
453
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,901
Yeah. This house is really amazing.
454
00:24:04,109 --> 00:24:05,109
[phone dings]
455
00:24:06,028 --> 00:24:06,779
[O'Malley] Uhhh, you know what?
456
00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:07,655
I got to take off.
457
00:24:07,863 --> 00:24:11,617
I recommend that you pair that bundt
with a chilled Zinfandel.
458
00:24:12,242 --> 00:24:13,722
You should do that on your new patio.
459
00:24:13,827 --> 00:24:15,704
David, I love that patio.
460
00:24:15,913 --> 00:24:18,207
Now, if you'll excuse me.
461
00:24:18,415 --> 00:24:19,458
[steps on gravel]
462
00:24:21,085 --> 00:24:22,907
[Brendan]
April and the kids are going away...
463
00:24:22,977 --> 00:24:24,297
...for the weekend to her mother.
464
00:24:24,421 --> 00:24:28,092
She really wants me to make
that woman-shed fully habitable.
465
00:24:28,300 --> 00:24:31,053
By the time she gets back
from her mother's place.
466
00:24:31,261 --> 00:24:32,721
No easy task.
[truck engine starts]
467
00:24:32,930 --> 00:24:35,224
[children laughing]
[ominous Latin chanting]
468
00:24:35,432 --> 00:24:36,183
[hefty kick]
469
00:24:36,392 --> 00:24:39,186
[muted other worldy screech]
470
00:24:40,396 --> 00:24:41,146
[heavy thud]
[wet squelch]
471
00:24:41,355 --> 00:24:44,358
[children] Whoa! Let's scram!
472
00:24:45,192 --> 00:24:45,567
[slam]
473
00:24:45,776 --> 00:24:46,360
[engine roars]
474
00:24:46,568 --> 00:24:46,944
Oh, yeah.
475
00:24:47,152 --> 00:24:49,113
Duty calls, duty calls.
476
00:24:49,780 --> 00:24:51,448
[children laugh]
477
00:24:51,699 --> 00:24:52,408
[tires screech]
478
00:24:52,616 --> 00:24:53,200
[children hiss]
479
00:24:53,409 --> 00:24:54,702
Fucking crazy ass kids.
480
00:24:54,910 --> 00:24:56,704
Get the fuck out of here!
[children giggle]
481
00:24:56,912 --> 00:24:58,414
Fucking beansprouts.
482
00:24:58,622 --> 00:25:01,542
Vaya con dios, amigo.
483
00:25:02,084 --> 00:25:03,084
[truck screeches away]
484
00:25:05,963 --> 00:25:07,339
[ominous synth stab]
485
00:25:14,013 --> 00:25:17,224
[intimidating guitar twanging]
486
00:25:17,433 --> 00:25:18,892
[urine spattering on the ground]
487
00:25:36,952 --> 00:25:38,245
[footsteps on gravel]
488
00:25:46,420 --> 00:25:47,420
[engine starts]
489
00:25:47,713 --> 00:25:48,713
[door slams]
490
00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:51,258
[engine roars]
[tires spit gravel]
491
00:25:56,388 --> 00:25:57,765
[papers shuffle]
492
00:26:02,311 --> 00:26:04,271
Make much money with your
493
00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:05,898
businesses out here, sir?
494
00:26:06,106 --> 00:26:07,983
[man] I got three
of my convenience stores now.
495
00:26:08,192 --> 00:26:09,985
I got a Benny's Desert Fast Rip here,
496
00:26:10,194 --> 00:26:12,780
one out in Indio,
and another one in Hesperia.
497
00:26:12,988 --> 00:26:15,032
Working on getting a few more
off the ground.
498
00:26:16,116 --> 00:26:17,451
They're all very lucrative.
499
00:26:17,659 --> 00:26:19,787
I'll have you know,
for your information.
500
00:26:19,995 --> 00:26:22,998
[man] Before you came along
I was regrouting floors at the KFC
501
00:26:23,207 --> 00:26:24,416
for ten bucks an hour.
502
00:26:24,625 --> 00:26:26,418
You really saved my ass.
503
00:26:26,627 --> 00:26:29,254
I saw you had potential, Spragg.
504
00:26:29,463 --> 00:26:31,548
You had the makings of a Promised Man.
505
00:26:32,424 --> 00:26:33,425
I'm something of a...
506
00:26:33,634 --> 00:26:36,136
Modern day alchemist.
507
00:26:36,345 --> 00:26:40,516
I can take human excreta
like you and mold you...
508
00:26:40,724 --> 00:26:42,309
Into a warrior.
509
00:26:43,018 --> 00:26:43,685
[Spragg] Fucking A.
510
00:26:43,894 --> 00:26:45,521
You're an inspiration to the men.
511
00:26:45,729 --> 00:26:47,397
You're like a father to us.
512
00:26:47,606 --> 00:26:47,856
Damn it!
513
00:26:48,065 --> 00:26:49,399
You are my son, Spragg.
514
00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:50,984
You're all my sons.
515
00:26:51,193 --> 00:26:54,154
I made you my sons.
516
00:26:54,363 --> 00:26:56,490
You got any real kids, Mr. Piazza?
517
00:26:56,698 --> 00:26:57,741
Rugrats?
518
00:26:57,950 --> 00:26:59,785
Sperm-children? Offspring?
519
00:26:59,993 --> 00:27:01,411
Yeah. You know. Affirmative.
520
00:27:01,620 --> 00:27:03,831
Sure I do.
521
00:27:04,039 --> 00:27:06,375
I'm not fond of the boy, though.
522
00:27:06,583 --> 00:27:09,169
[Spragg]
Well, they're a handful, you know,
523
00:27:09,378 --> 00:27:11,755
They said "just wait till
they start talking back," and...
524
00:27:11,964 --> 00:27:13,841
They weren't wrong.
525
00:27:15,425 --> 00:27:18,095
My favorite phase is when they're just
526
00:27:18,303 --> 00:27:19,888
little babies.
527
00:27:20,097 --> 00:27:24,184
My favorite phase was the jizz
coming out of my dick.
528
00:27:24,393 --> 00:27:26,562
It was all downhill from there.
529
00:27:26,770 --> 00:27:28,772
You really do have beef with this kid,
don't you?
530
00:27:28,981 --> 00:27:30,711
I cast the boy off
as soon as he failed me,
531
00:27:31,181 --> 00:27:32,609
like a fart in the wind.
532
00:27:32,818 --> 00:27:34,236
[Spragg] Failed you?
533
00:27:34,444 --> 00:27:35,821
How's that?
534
00:27:36,029 --> 00:27:38,490
He was a child of a 7 or 8 years old.
535
00:27:38,699 --> 00:27:40,492
Already a root of discord.
536
00:27:40,701 --> 00:27:42,619
We are en route to Sparks, Nevada.
537
00:27:42,870 --> 00:27:45,205
I needed gasoline
and had to take a slash.
538
00:27:45,414 --> 00:27:47,457
We stopped over at a Terrible's,
Chevron.
539
00:27:47,666 --> 00:27:50,805
We emptied our bladders
in the restroom side by side,
540
00:27:50,885 --> 00:27:53,706
and some castoff chewing gum
in the urinal
541
00:27:53,776 --> 00:27:55,307
caught the boy's eye.
542
00:27:56,175 --> 00:27:58,802
He picked that thing up
and he proceeded to chew it.
543
00:27:59,011 --> 00:28:00,179
The urinal-gum?
544
00:28:00,387 --> 00:28:05,350
Chewed up, discarded,
urine-tainted, toilet gum Spragg!
545
00:28:05,559 --> 00:28:06,185
God dang.
546
00:28:06,393 --> 00:28:09,521
At that moment I knew,
I was done with the boy.
547
00:28:10,772 --> 00:28:13,483
I turned around,
brought him back to his mother's.
548
00:28:13,692 --> 00:28:16,153
I've seen neither of them
since that day.
549
00:28:16,361 --> 00:28:18,322
I guess I would have done the same.
550
00:28:18,530 --> 00:28:20,449
I would have done the same thing, boss.
551
00:28:20,657 --> 00:28:22,534
Now I have my own family.
552
00:28:22,743 --> 00:28:24,870
- Yep.
- [man] A family of warriors.
553
00:28:25,078 --> 00:28:25,579
[Spragg] Warriors.
554
00:28:25,787 --> 00:28:27,787
[man] And this country's
last chance for salvation.
555
00:28:27,873 --> 00:28:30,125
And with the magnificent
metamorphosis of my homunculus
556
00:28:30,334 --> 00:28:32,336
coming to a conclusion...
557
00:28:32,544 --> 00:28:36,215
Total victory is on the horizon.
558
00:28:38,508 --> 00:28:40,802
[music intensifies]
559
00:28:41,011 --> 00:28:42,596
[truck revs]
560
00:28:52,731 --> 00:28:53,731
[mild plop]
561
00:28:56,485 --> 00:28:58,237
[garage door jangling]
562
00:29:02,532 --> 00:29:03,532
[birdsong]
563
00:29:04,284 --> 00:29:06,083
[Aiden]
Mom, I like, really gotta take a whizzy!
564
00:29:06,153 --> 00:29:07,907
[girl] Had a hamburger for breakfast...
565
00:29:07,977 --> 00:29:09,248
[Aiden] Starlynn! Shhh!
566
00:29:09,456 --> 00:29:12,007
Well honey, I'll...
I'll have that she-shed...
567
00:29:12,077 --> 00:29:14,344
...whipped into shape
by the time you get back.
568
00:29:14,711 --> 00:29:16,213
You're leaving a house...
569
00:29:16,421 --> 00:29:18,465
You'll come back to a home.
570
00:29:18,674 --> 00:29:20,717
Don't work too hard, Brendan.
571
00:29:20,968 --> 00:29:22,135
All right.
572
00:29:22,344 --> 00:29:24,471
You and the kids have a good time
at your mother's.
573
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:25,472
[Start yon] Bye bye daddy!
574
00:29:25,681 --> 00:29:26,765
See you when you get home.
575
00:29:27,516 --> 00:29:29,977
[kids] Bye dad, love you!
576
00:29:31,061 --> 00:29:32,854
Have fun guys.
[car horn honks]
577
00:29:33,647 --> 00:29:35,524
[kids weirdly groaning]
578
00:29:38,318 --> 00:29:39,987
[ominous music]
579
00:29:40,195 --> 00:29:43,031
[Brendan] What the hell
is going on with my family van?
580
00:29:45,117 --> 00:29:46,201
[steam hissing]
581
00:29:46,410 --> 00:29:48,537
Oh, no. Smoke.
582
00:29:48,745 --> 00:29:52,165
Last time I checked,
it's not a good sign.
583
00:29:52,499 --> 00:29:53,792
[steam hissing]
584
00:29:55,711 --> 00:29:57,004
[bubbling and gurgling]
585
00:29:59,256 --> 00:30:01,383
Wow.
586
00:30:02,884 --> 00:30:03,969
[meaty squelch]
587
00:30:04,177 --> 00:30:06,096
Are you for real?
588
00:30:06,305 --> 00:30:08,307
Oh my god, this is so weird.
589
00:30:08,515 --> 00:30:09,808
[ghostly whoosh]
590
00:30:14,062 --> 00:30:15,355
[ethereal steam hiss]
591
00:30:16,982 --> 00:30:18,275
[rhythmic thumping]
592
00:30:20,027 --> 00:30:22,487
[squishing and squelching]
593
00:30:22,696 --> 00:30:25,657
[demonic growl]
[rhythmic rustling]
594
00:30:25,866 --> 00:30:28,827
[sac breaching squelch]
595
00:30:30,746 --> 00:30:33,707
[ominous Latin chanting]
596
00:30:34,374 --> 00:30:35,375
Oh my god.
597
00:30:35,584 --> 00:30:38,628
[creature groaning]
[squishy egg breaching]
598
00:30:38,837 --> 00:30:40,589
[Brendan] What the fuck?
599
00:30:40,797 --> 00:30:43,091
[creature moaning]
600
00:30:43,759 --> 00:30:44,593
What are you?
601
00:30:44,801 --> 00:30:46,803
Hoag! Hoag!
602
00:30:47,054 --> 00:30:48,597
I-I can't believe this.
603
00:30:48,805 --> 00:30:50,807
- You can talk?
- [creature] Hoag! Hoag!
604
00:30:51,016 --> 00:30:53,310
Hoag!? Oh my god, he said hoag!
605
00:30:53,518 --> 00:30:54,561
Hoag, is that your name?
606
00:30:54,770 --> 00:30:56,188
Is your name hoag?
607
00:30:56,396 --> 00:30:57,397
No!
608
00:30:57,606 --> 00:30:59,524
Hoagie.
609
00:31:00,275 --> 00:31:01,610
Hoagie.
610
00:31:02,694 --> 00:31:04,321
Hi, Hoagie.
611
00:31:04,529 --> 00:31:05,529
I'm Brendan.
612
00:31:05,614 --> 00:31:06,740
Brendan Bean.
613
00:31:06,948 --> 00:31:08,533
I don't know what you are,
614
00:31:08,742 --> 00:31:11,686
I don't know where you came from,
but Hoagie,
615
00:31:11,756 --> 00:31:14,998
you are just about the strangest
little thing I've ever seen.
616
00:31:15,207 --> 00:31:17,834
Come on, let's get you someplace safe.
617
00:31:18,210 --> 00:31:19,795
Brendan.
618
00:31:21,004 --> 00:31:22,714
[Hoagie] Brendan!
619
00:31:22,923 --> 00:31:27,969
[woman] Hi, so it says here
that these pot pies have probiotics,
620
00:31:28,178 --> 00:31:29,930
and are filled with super-foods,
621
00:31:30,138 --> 00:31:33,600
But looking at the ingredients,
I just don't see how that's possible.
622
00:31:33,809 --> 00:31:38,605
So, probiotics are actually, like,
you can't really see them in the food,
623
00:31:38,814 --> 00:31:41,691
but they're there, and they,
like, cure loads of ailments,
624
00:31:41,900 --> 00:31:45,153
and super foods are like,
there's nothing, they don't like,
625
00:31:45,362 --> 00:31:46,571
Look super anything,
626
00:31:46,780 --> 00:31:49,825
But... they're full of health.
627
00:31:50,033 --> 00:31:51,033
[woman] Uh huh.
628
00:31:51,159 --> 00:31:53,870
Well, it just looks like
a normal pot pie.
629
00:31:54,121 --> 00:31:56,748
It actually looks really bad for you.
630
00:31:56,957 --> 00:32:00,085
Like, it literally says ground beef.
631
00:32:00,710 --> 00:32:03,755
Cubed beef and... meatballs
632
00:32:03,964 --> 00:32:06,758
all separately,
which doesn't even make sense.
633
00:32:06,967 --> 00:32:10,554
And what is, squirted meat product?
634
00:32:10,762 --> 00:32:14,516
So actually, it's, like,
full of ashwagandha
635
00:32:15,809 --> 00:32:19,438
green tea powder and, like, qigong
636
00:32:19,646 --> 00:32:25,318
and Reiki mushrooms and lingen
and chai berries and stuff.
637
00:32:25,652 --> 00:32:29,573
[tires on gravel]
[threatening music]
638
00:32:35,245 --> 00:32:36,245
[door slams]
639
00:32:38,248 --> 00:32:39,291
[bolt racked on firearm]
640
00:32:46,965 --> 00:32:48,008
[hurried footsteps]
641
00:32:59,561 --> 00:33:00,604
[cage door squeaks]
642
00:33:02,814 --> 00:33:04,691
[gooey squish]
643
00:33:13,033 --> 00:33:14,075
Fuckers!
644
00:33:14,284 --> 00:33:16,286
Leave!
645
00:33:17,162 --> 00:33:18,330
[male customer clears throat]
646
00:33:19,498 --> 00:33:20,540
[exit bell chimes]
647
00:33:22,709 --> 00:33:24,127
[sweeping]
648
00:33:27,839 --> 00:33:28,840
Oh hi, Benny.
649
00:33:29,049 --> 00:33:32,093
Hi my ass, you bean-brained dildo.
650
00:33:33,512 --> 00:33:35,096
Look, Benny, I'm assisting this
651
00:33:35,305 --> 00:33:39,184
very inquisitive customer,
and it's just, like, not a good time.
652
00:33:39,392 --> 00:33:41,603
Listen, hard, you fucking mutton head.
653
00:33:41,811 --> 00:33:44,356
Where is my homunculus zygote?
654
00:33:44,564 --> 00:33:47,567
Why is my Hoagie cage empty!?
655
00:33:47,984 --> 00:33:48,610
Wait, what?
656
00:33:48,818 --> 00:33:50,779
What happened to Hoagie? Oh, my...
657
00:33:50,987 --> 00:33:51,738
I can't believe it.
658
00:33:51,947 --> 00:33:54,115
Where did he... where did it go?
659
00:33:54,324 --> 00:33:55,951
That's like strange.
660
00:33:56,159 --> 00:33:59,246
You got the IQ
of a goddamn salad bar, lady.
661
00:33:59,454 --> 00:34:00,163
And you.
662
00:34:00,372 --> 00:34:03,291
Brunt! What the hell do you do all day?
663
00:34:03,500 --> 00:34:06,253
The kitchen smells like King Kong
took a fucking dump in there!
664
00:34:06,461 --> 00:34:10,131
This entire place
has the stench of dog farts and...
665
00:34:10,340 --> 00:34:11,341
Asparagus pee.
666
00:34:11,550 --> 00:34:13,510
What the hell am I paying
you jackals for?
667
00:34:13,718 --> 00:34:14,302
Dog fart.
668
00:34:14,511 --> 00:34:15,511
[Benny] Dog fart?
669
00:34:16,388 --> 00:34:17,472
That's right, dog fart.
670
00:34:17,681 --> 00:34:19,683
You ought to have your goddamn
brains counted.
671
00:34:19,891 --> 00:34:23,228
All you do is lurk around back there
with that broom like some Spanish moss
672
00:34:23,520 --> 00:34:24,145
Dog fart.
673
00:34:24,354 --> 00:34:26,481
[Benny] Get back to work,
you flip pin dipshit.
674
00:34:26,690 --> 00:34:28,607
Where is the egg?
Speak, you dipshit,
675
00:34:28,677 --> 00:34:30,569
before I remove
your goddamn balls for you.
676
00:34:30,777 --> 00:34:32,279
Who is this psycho?
677
00:34:32,654 --> 00:34:33,947
[Benny] Your time is soon,
678
00:34:34,155 --> 00:34:36,950
And if you fuck with me
your time will be now.
679
00:34:37,158 --> 00:34:41,204
[Spragg] Hey Benny, this is Spragg.
We got the location secured.
680
00:34:41,580 --> 00:34:42,664
Speak, Trisha...
681
00:34:42,872 --> 00:34:44,262
Someone must have, like, stolen it.
682
00:34:44,332 --> 00:34:47,335
And that really, really sucks.
683
00:34:47,794 --> 00:34:50,255
I explicitly told you not to never,
ever sell it.
684
00:34:50,463 --> 00:34:53,842
I told you his powers were too great
and that it is too dangerous,
685
00:34:54,050 --> 00:34:55,809
And that man is not ready
for these forces...
686
00:34:55,879 --> 00:34:57,387
...to be unleashed upon the world.
687
00:34:57,804 --> 00:35:01,558
Do you realize that through
your stupidity and puerile greed,
688
00:35:01,766 --> 00:35:04,644
you have compromised the mission
of the Promised Men,
689
00:35:04,853 --> 00:35:08,732
and that has put my destiny as the ruler
of this nation into jeopardy.
690
00:35:08,940 --> 00:35:10,692
Now get the fuck out of my sight!
691
00:35:10,900 --> 00:35:12,444
You two get the fuck out of here!
692
00:35:13,778 --> 00:35:15,822
Your homunculus.
693
00:35:16,031 --> 00:35:18,199
He's not in the cage.
694
00:35:18,408 --> 00:35:20,744
I got to gather some intel
the old fashioned way.
695
00:35:20,952 --> 00:35:22,829
[Spragg] Hoagie, he's missing.
696
00:35:23,038 --> 00:35:25,832
I gotta ask the ancient ones.
697
00:35:26,041 --> 00:35:28,001
[ominous guitar twangs]
698
00:35:28,209 --> 00:35:29,753
I'm tapping the source.
699
00:35:29,961 --> 00:35:32,881
[Hoagie moaning]
[water spraying]
700
00:35:33,089 --> 00:35:35,467
Cold! Cold!
701
00:35:36,384 --> 00:35:39,220
Cold. Yeah, I bet you're cold.
702
00:35:39,429 --> 00:35:41,264
Let's get you warmed up, bud.
703
00:35:41,473 --> 00:35:43,516
[Hoagie whimpering]
704
00:35:46,561 --> 00:35:49,648
Gosh, you sure are something.
705
00:35:51,733 --> 00:35:53,693
Hey, cool!
706
00:35:56,529 --> 00:35:58,365
[Brendan] You can do whatever I can do.
707
00:35:58,573 --> 00:36:00,784
You're pretty smart my friend.
708
00:36:00,992 --> 00:36:03,078
Wait till April and the kids
get a load of you.
709
00:36:03,286 --> 00:36:05,205
They'll shit their Drains out!
710
00:36:05,413 --> 00:36:06,873
- April.
- Oh no!
711
00:36:07,082 --> 00:36:08,625
April.
712
00:36:08,833 --> 00:36:10,377
What is it, Brendan?
713
00:36:10,585 --> 00:36:13,630
I promised April
I'd finish her new she-shed.
714
00:36:13,838 --> 00:36:14,838
We just had a fight
715
00:36:14,923 --> 00:36:18,593
about how I never follow through
with my chores around the new house.
716
00:36:18,802 --> 00:36:20,136
Take a look at this place.
717
00:36:20,345 --> 00:36:22,055
Does this look like a she-shed to you?
718
00:36:22,263 --> 00:36:22,889
[Hoagie] Shed.
719
00:36:23,098 --> 00:36:24,724
More like a turkey shed.
720
00:36:24,933 --> 00:36:26,851
With all the excitement of finding you,
721
00:36:27,060 --> 00:36:28,937
I just completely forgot.
722
00:36:29,145 --> 00:36:31,314
[Hoagie chanting strangely]
[mystical music]
723
00:36:31,523 --> 00:36:34,150
Brendan, you really dropped
the ball on this one.
724
00:36:34,359 --> 00:36:35,151
[Hoagie chanting strangely]
725
00:36:35,402 --> 00:36:39,114
[Brendan] Oh I shat the bed this time.
Honey's gonna be pissed.
726
00:36:39,864 --> 00:36:42,867
Oh, Brendan,
you really pulled a boner this time.
727
00:36:43,743 --> 00:36:45,787
Hoagie, what are you doing?
728
00:36:45,995 --> 00:36:47,872
[magical sprinkles]
729
00:36:48,707 --> 00:36:50,125
[Hoagie chanting]
730
00:36:50,333 --> 00:36:52,168
[Hoagie chanting]
[supernatural zooms]
731
00:36:52,419 --> 00:36:54,295
[mystifying explosions]
732
00:36:54,963 --> 00:36:55,755
[Brandon] Oh my god,
733
00:36:55,964 --> 00:36:57,173
look at all this stuff!
734
00:36:57,382 --> 00:36:59,050
Look at all these great things!
735
00:37:00,343 --> 00:37:03,054
[Hoagie] Beans gather here.
736
00:37:03,263 --> 00:37:07,267
[Brendan] Hoagie, this place
looks utterly fucking amazing!
737
00:37:07,767 --> 00:37:09,352
April's gonna love it.
738
00:37:09,561 --> 00:37:11,271
She's gonna shit when she sees it.
739
00:37:11,479 --> 00:37:12,689
[Hoagie grunting]
740
00:37:12,897 --> 00:37:15,233
[magical fart]
[descending fairy dust]
741
00:37:15,984 --> 00:37:17,444
[extra-dimensional whoosh]
742
00:37:17,652 --> 00:37:19,904
[spinning pizza]
[electrical buzzing]
743
00:37:20,113 --> 00:37:21,823
[Brendan] Whoa! Is that pizza!?
744
00:37:23,366 --> 00:37:25,368
[whooshing intensifies]
745
00:37:25,577 --> 00:37:27,078
[metallic clangs]
746
00:37:27,287 --> 00:37:29,080
[steam hiss]
747
00:37:30,331 --> 00:37:31,332
[squish]
748
00:37:31,541 --> 00:37:35,420
- [Brendan] Pizza!?
- [Hoagie] More! More food!
749
00:37:35,628 --> 00:37:36,755
[Brendan] More food!?
750
00:37:36,963 --> 00:37:38,882
Houston, we have contact!
751
00:37:39,090 --> 00:37:40,300
He likes food, people!
752
00:37:40,508 --> 00:37:41,508
[Hoagie] Foooooo...
753
00:37:42,594 --> 00:37:45,597
[ominous music]
754
00:37:53,688 --> 00:37:55,106
Watch the perimeter.
755
00:37:55,315 --> 00:37:57,358
You've got my six.
756
00:38:05,241 --> 00:38:06,951
[crunchy bite]
757
00:38:08,703 --> 00:38:10,079
[chunky spit]
758
00:38:10,622 --> 00:38:12,040
[Spragg] Mr. Piazza!
759
00:38:12,248 --> 00:38:12,957
This apple,
760
00:38:13,166 --> 00:38:14,793
This apple is donkey shits,
761
00:38:15,001 --> 00:38:17,337
and it sucks donkey dicks, sir!
762
00:38:21,508 --> 00:38:24,219
[Spragg] You need... You good in there?
763
00:38:24,803 --> 00:38:27,055
[ominous guitar]
764
00:38:30,141 --> 00:38:31,142
I hate this part.
765
00:38:51,788 --> 00:38:53,373
Time to lube up Benny.
[squirt]
766
00:38:53,581 --> 00:38:55,124
This is game day.
767
00:38:55,333 --> 00:38:57,043
This is why we train.
768
00:38:57,502 --> 00:39:00,046
This is why we train.
769
00:39:00,547 --> 00:39:02,715
Oh yeah!
770
00:39:03,716 --> 00:39:06,594
This is why we train! This is why.
771
00:39:06,803 --> 00:39:07,387
Ohhhhh
772
00:39:07,595 --> 00:39:09,264
Tapping the source.
773
00:39:09,472 --> 00:39:10,974
Ahhhhhh!
774
00:39:11,224 --> 00:39:12,892
That is the way!
775
00:39:13,101 --> 00:39:14,143
[sucking in breath]
776
00:39:14,352 --> 00:39:16,980
[creaking door]
777
00:39:21,317 --> 00:39:24,320
[gust of wind]
778
00:39:30,326 --> 00:39:32,912
[fleshy vibrations]
779
00:39:37,917 --> 00:39:39,627
[gooey squish]
780
00:39:40,628 --> 00:39:43,631
[viscous dripping]
[heavy squelch]
781
00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:46,843
[ecstatic supernatural moans]
782
00:39:49,512 --> 00:39:52,181
[squishy movement]
783
00:39:52,390 --> 00:39:55,685
[moaning]
784
00:40:00,815 --> 00:40:02,525
[squelching]
785
00:40:08,865 --> 00:40:10,575
[ominous music continues]
786
00:40:16,873 --> 00:40:21,961
[ecstatic moans]
787
00:40:22,170 --> 00:40:24,172
[gooey squelching]
788
00:40:27,759 --> 00:40:29,469
[rubbery movement]
789
00:40:33,973 --> 00:40:35,683
[meaty entry]
790
00:40:51,866 --> 00:40:53,910
[gentle caresses]
791
00:41:00,458 --> 00:41:04,337
[gentle heartbeat]
792
00:41:10,385 --> 00:41:12,095
[heavy squelch]
793
00:41:15,390 --> 00:41:17,100
[squish]
794
00:41:34,659 --> 00:41:35,659
[footsteps on gravel]
795
00:41:35,827 --> 00:41:37,453
[whoosh]
796
00:41:37,662 --> 00:41:39,539
[Brendan] Hi Hoagie.
797
00:41:40,498 --> 00:41:42,625
I don't know what you are.
798
00:41:43,918 --> 00:41:46,337
I don't know where you came from.
799
00:41:47,547 --> 00:41:49,257
[music intensifies]
800
00:41:51,592 --> 00:41:52,844
[whoosh]
801
00:41:53,052 --> 00:41:54,303
[juicy squelching]
802
00:41:54,512 --> 00:41:55,013
[Brendan] I'm Brendan.
803
00:41:55,221 --> 00:41:56,723
Brendan Bean.
804
00:41:58,433 --> 00:41:59,433
Towel.
805
00:41:59,684 --> 00:42:02,103
I need to replenish my endocrine system.
806
00:42:02,478 --> 00:42:03,730
I need some lipids.
807
00:42:04,647 --> 00:42:06,065
Amino acids!
808
00:42:06,274 --> 00:42:07,650
So you, uh?
809
00:42:07,859 --> 00:42:10,486
You locate the asset, the ah,
810
00:42:10,695 --> 00:42:12,905
homunculus thing?
811
00:42:14,115 --> 00:42:15,992
Find me this Brendan Bean!
812
00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:17,285
Brendan Bean.
813
00:42:17,493 --> 00:42:19,717
- Mobilize the Promised Men.
- [Spragg] Dude, that name sucks.
814
00:42:19,787 --> 00:42:21,469
All right,
so do you want me to get all the dudes?
815
00:42:21,539 --> 00:42:23,624
All the dudes!
816
00:42:23,833 --> 00:42:24,333
Ahhhhh!
817
00:42:24,542 --> 00:42:25,542
[mellow music]
818
00:42:25,668 --> 00:42:26,668
[Hoagie] More food!
819
00:42:27,795 --> 00:42:28,795
Ah!
820
00:42:29,255 --> 00:42:31,340
Well, I figure,
821
00:42:31,549 --> 00:42:33,342
you must be hungry.
822
00:42:35,511 --> 00:42:37,221
The key to a good sandwich, Hoagie,
823
00:42:37,430 --> 00:42:39,015
is the mustard.
824
00:42:39,223 --> 00:42:40,349
Sandwich!
825
00:42:40,892 --> 00:42:42,810
I'm a mild Dijon kinda guy.
826
00:42:43,019 --> 00:42:44,103
Love the tang,
827
00:42:44,312 --> 00:42:45,354
hate the spice.
828
00:42:45,563 --> 00:42:46,563
Tang!
829
00:42:46,773 --> 00:42:48,274
That's right Hoagie, tang!
830
00:42:48,483 --> 00:42:49,650
Tang!
831
00:42:51,235 --> 00:42:53,404
[Brendan]
It's got a nice little tang to it.
832
00:42:53,613 --> 00:42:54,447
You like that?
833
00:42:54,655 --> 00:42:56,449
Wait' ll you try this.
834
00:42:56,657 --> 00:42:59,786
[Music shifts to upbeat pop]
♪ When you feel that rhythm ♪
835
00:42:59,994 --> 00:43:03,081
♪ And the feeling's right ♪
836
00:43:03,289 --> 00:43:06,000
♪ Got a love that your givin' ♪
837
00:43:06,209 --> 00:43:10,046
♪ And a chance to be alive ♪
838
00:43:10,254 --> 00:43:13,049
♪ With your feet and the rhythm ♪
839
00:43:13,257 --> 00:43:16,052
♪ And the rhythm high ♪
840
00:43:16,260 --> 00:43:19,639
♪ Got to love that your livin' ♪
841
00:43:19,747 --> 00:43:23,768
- Ow!
- ♪ Cause I'm dancin' on the sky! ♪
842
00:43:25,353 --> 00:43:27,772
♪ Wide open blue ♪
843
00:43:27,980 --> 00:43:30,983
♪ We can fly! ♪
844
00:43:31,317 --> 00:43:34,320
♪ When it's me and it's you ♪
845
00:43:34,946 --> 00:43:37,532
♪ It's fun to do ♪
846
00:43:37,740 --> 00:43:40,910
♪ These things with you ♪
847
00:43:41,494 --> 00:43:44,497
♪ You're number one ♪
848
00:43:44,914 --> 00:43:47,875
♪ It's so much fun ♪
849
00:43:48,167 --> 00:43:51,170
♪ I love to see ♪
850
00:43:51,504 --> 00:43:54,507
♪ The world with thee ♪
851
00:43:54,757 --> 00:43:57,468
♪ We're far from done ♪
852
00:43:57,677 --> 00:44:02,431
♪ Cause it's so much
goddamn fuckin' fun! ♪
853
00:44:02,807 --> 00:44:05,893
♪ Oh the look that you're givin' ♪
854
00:44:06,102 --> 00:44:08,855
♪ Dancin' in your eye! ♪
855
00:44:09,480 --> 00:44:12,483
♪ Got a feelin' like forever ♪
856
00:44:12,817 --> 00:44:17,029
♪ We are gonna be alive! ♪
857
00:44:17,947 --> 00:44:20,908
♪ They won't bring us down ♪
858
00:44:21,117 --> 00:44:24,120
♪ We can fly ♪
859
00:44:24,370 --> 00:44:27,623
♪ And I'll be your clown ♪
860
00:44:27,874 --> 00:44:30,668
♪ It's fun to do ♪
861
00:44:31,252 --> 00:44:34,297
♪ Fun things with you ♪
862
00:44:34,505 --> 00:44:37,508
♪ You're number one ♪
863
00:44:37,842 --> 00:44:40,928
♪ It's so much fun ♪
864
00:44:41,137 --> 00:44:43,973
♪ I love to see ♪
865
00:44:44,182 --> 00:44:47,185
♪ The world with thee ♪
866
00:44:47,393 --> 00:44:50,396
♪ We're far from done ♪
867
00:44:50,605 --> 00:44:54,650
♪ Because it's so much
goddamn fuckin'... ♪
868
00:44:54,859 --> 00:44:57,778
[harmonica solo]
869
00:45:02,325 --> 00:45:03,451
[splash]
870
00:45:08,206 --> 00:45:09,916
[wheels rolling]
871
00:45:14,420 --> 00:45:15,880
[music box]
872
00:45:16,088 --> 00:45:17,798
[enamored grunts]
873
00:45:19,634 --> 00:45:20,968
[machinery operating]
874
00:45:21,177 --> 00:45:23,554
♪ It's fun to do ♪
875
00:45:23,763 --> 00:45:26,432
♪ Fun things with you ♪
876
00:45:26,641 --> 00:45:30,561
♪ You're number one ♪
877
00:45:30,770 --> 00:45:33,105
♪ it's so much fun ♪
878
00:45:33,314 --> 00:45:37,026
[radio] ♪ I love to see ♪
879
00:45:37,443 --> 00:45:40,154
♪ The world with thee ♪
880
00:45:40,363 --> 00:45:42,073
[ominous guitar twangs]
881
00:45:42,949 --> 00:45:44,659
[phone dialing]
882
00:45:44,992 --> 00:45:46,702
[phone ringing]
883
00:45:47,370 --> 00:45:47,787
Hello.
884
00:45:47,995 --> 00:45:49,664
[Brendan] Davidson Dugan?
885
00:45:49,872 --> 00:45:51,207
It's Brendan Bean.
886
00:45:51,415 --> 00:45:52,166
Ah, Brendan.
887
00:45:52,375 --> 00:45:53,472
To what do I owe the pleasure?
888
00:45:53,542 --> 00:45:55,962
[Brendan] Hoagie!
Don't make a mess over there.
889
00:45:56,170 --> 00:45:57,226
[ranch dressing squirting]
[Brendan] Hoagie?
890
00:45:57,296 --> 00:45:59,882
Haven't you had enough ranch?
891
00:46:00,091 --> 00:46:01,425
Brendan, is everything okay?
892
00:46:01,634 --> 00:46:05,263
Hoagie, you can't just eat the hot dog.
[slurping and munching]
893
00:46:05,471 --> 00:46:06,631
You gotta have the bun.
[burp]
894
00:46:06,722 --> 00:46:08,307
That's what's got all the nutrients.
895
00:46:08,516 --> 00:46:09,809
It's an enriched bun.
896
00:46:10,017 --> 00:46:12,311
It's for your growth
and your development, Hoagie.
897
00:46:12,520 --> 00:46:13,312
Hoagie!?
898
00:46:13,521 --> 00:46:16,274
Brendan, what in god's name
is going on over there?
899
00:46:16,482 --> 00:46:17,955
I'm gonna be blunt with you, Davidson.
900
00:46:18,025 --> 00:46:18,859
[Hoagie] Fooood!
901
00:46:19,068 --> 00:46:20,695
[Brendan] I found something.
902
00:46:20,945 --> 00:46:21,654
[clutching]
903
00:46:21,862 --> 00:46:24,522
And I think you're the only one
that I know...
904
00:46:24,592 --> 00:46:26,158
...that can shine some light on this.
905
00:46:26,409 --> 00:46:29,036
Brendan, I'm a simple
mammalogist for cryin' out loud.
906
00:46:29,245 --> 00:46:30,413
I study animals.
907
00:46:30,621 --> 00:46:33,291
Are you telling me
you found some sort of...
908
00:46:33,499 --> 00:46:33,874
[munching]
909
00:46:34,083 --> 00:46:34,917
Animal?
910
00:46:35,126 --> 00:46:37,420
[Brendan]
I don't know what I found, Davidson.
911
00:46:38,004 --> 00:46:40,186
I think I need you to see this.
[munching and crunching]
912
00:46:40,256 --> 00:46:40,840
Brendan,
913
00:46:41,048 --> 00:46:42,216
I'm your friend from college.
914
00:46:42,425 --> 00:46:43,522
Of course I'll help you out.
915
00:46:43,592 --> 00:46:45,094
My door is always open.
916
00:46:45,303 --> 00:46:46,303
Thank you, Davidson.
917
00:46:46,470 --> 00:46:48,264
I knew I could count on you.
918
00:46:48,472 --> 00:46:49,672
You're a great college friend.
919
00:46:49,849 --> 00:46:50,849
[Hoagie] Food.
920
00:46:52,476 --> 00:46:53,602
All right, Hoagie.
921
00:46:53,811 --> 00:46:55,493
Looks like we're going
on a little road trip.
922
00:46:55,563 --> 00:46:56,563
[Hoagie burps]
923
00:46:58,107 --> 00:46:58,733
[Hoagie making strange noises]
924
00:46:58,941 --> 00:47:01,944
[montage song plays on the radio]
925
00:47:03,654 --> 00:47:05,072
[Hoagie] Scooter!
926
00:47:06,657 --> 00:47:08,034
How ya doin' back there, Hoagie?
927
00:47:08,409 --> 00:47:09,994
Good Brendan.
928
00:47:10,202 --> 00:47:12,079
Where are we going?
929
00:47:12,538 --> 00:47:14,623
We're going to see
a very old friend of mine.
930
00:47:14,832 --> 00:47:15,916
I'm taking you to meet him.
931
00:47:17,501 --> 00:47:19,337
Friend?
932
00:47:19,754 --> 00:47:21,047
Friend?
933
00:47:21,756 --> 00:47:24,050
You know,
two people that know each other.
934
00:47:24,258 --> 00:47:26,093
Care about each other.
935
00:47:26,302 --> 00:47:28,304
Kind of like you and me, Hoagie.
936
00:47:28,512 --> 00:47:30,556
We're friends.
937
00:47:30,765 --> 00:47:32,892
Friend.
938
00:47:33,809 --> 00:47:35,394
[Montage song dominates the soundtrack]
939
00:47:35,603 --> 00:47:38,314
♪ It's fun to do ♪
940
00:47:38,522 --> 00:47:41,734
♪ Fun things with you ♪
941
00:47:41,942 --> 00:47:45,446
♪ You're number one ♪
942
00:47:45,654 --> 00:47:48,783
♪ It's so much fun ♪
943
00:47:48,991 --> 00:47:51,702
♪ I love to see ♪
944
00:47:51,911 --> 00:47:55,289
♪ The world with thee ♪
945
00:47:55,498 --> 00:47:57,833
♪ We're far from done ♪
946
00:47:58,084 --> 00:48:03,005
♪ Because it's so much
goddamn fucking fun ♪
947
00:48:03,214 --> 00:48:04,548
[Hoagie muttering]
948
00:48:06,842 --> 00:48:08,302
Fruit.
949
00:48:08,511 --> 00:48:11,222
It's good for your brain development.
950
00:48:11,430 --> 00:48:15,476
Hoagie, you're going to take a bite
of this and you're going to love it.
951
00:48:15,851 --> 00:48:17,186
It's called a banana.
952
00:48:17,395 --> 00:48:18,145
[Hoagie] Banana.
953
00:48:18,354 --> 00:48:20,398
No, no.
954
00:48:20,606 --> 00:48:23,150
Please eat the banana Hoagie.
955
00:48:23,359 --> 00:48:25,319
Fruit is good
for your brain development.
956
00:48:25,528 --> 00:48:26,612
See, it's good!
957
00:48:26,821 --> 00:48:28,280
[Hoagie groaning]
958
00:48:28,489 --> 00:48:29,115
[Brendan] Fruit is good!
959
00:48:29,323 --> 00:48:31,158
It's good for you! It's good!
960
00:48:31,367 --> 00:48:33,174
There you go. It's fruit.
[mushing and squishing]
961
00:48:33,244 --> 00:48:34,829
Fruit is good for you Hoagie.
962
00:48:35,121 --> 00:48:36,872
[charming sedate music]
963
00:48:37,164 --> 00:48:39,166
[squeaking pram]
964
00:48:45,714 --> 00:48:47,258
Here's the place Hoagie.
965
00:48:47,466 --> 00:48:50,803
I present the residence
of Dr. Davidson Dugan.
966
00:48:51,011 --> 00:48:52,680
Wow!
967
00:48:52,888 --> 00:48:54,723
Davidson.
968
00:48:56,976 --> 00:48:58,018
Brendan Bean.
969
00:48:58,227 --> 00:49:00,062
Davidson Dugan.
970
00:49:00,271 --> 00:49:01,522
[Brendan laughs]
971
00:49:01,730 --> 00:49:04,358
[synchronized grunting]
972
00:49:04,567 --> 00:49:07,570
[simultaneously]
You should see the other guy!
973
00:49:08,070 --> 00:49:09,488
Brendan Bean, it's been ages.
974
00:49:09,697 --> 00:49:10,697
How the hell are you?
975
00:49:10,781 --> 00:49:11,781
Very well Mr...
976
00:49:11,866 --> 00:49:14,243
Or should I say, Dr. Davidson?
977
00:49:14,452 --> 00:49:15,925
It's so good to see you,
but I've got to tell you,
978
00:49:15,995 --> 00:49:18,814
I'm curious as hell to figure out
what that frantic phone call was...
979
00:49:18,884 --> 00:49:19,895
Argh!
980
00:49:20,499 --> 00:49:22,001
[vigorous fecal eruptions]
981
00:49:22,543 --> 00:49:23,543
[liquid excretions]
982
00:49:23,878 --> 00:49:24,878
[continued squelching]
983
00:49:25,337 --> 00:49:26,630
No fruit!
984
00:49:26,839 --> 00:49:27,839
[shattering]
985
00:49:28,090 --> 00:49:30,551
Hi, Davidson.
[final exclamative fart]
986
00:49:31,051 --> 00:49:33,220
It knows my name.
987
00:49:33,429 --> 00:49:35,848
Dr. Davidson Dugan,
988
00:49:36,056 --> 00:49:38,309
I'd like to introduce you to Hoagie.
989
00:49:38,517 --> 00:49:39,185
Brendan,
990
00:49:39,393 --> 00:49:41,020
It's amazing.
991
00:49:41,228 --> 00:49:42,563
Davidson.
992
00:49:42,771 --> 00:49:44,815
Absolutely fascinating.
993
00:49:45,024 --> 00:49:45,649
Come.
994
00:49:45,858 --> 00:49:47,276
Both of you, come inside.
995
00:49:47,485 --> 00:49:47,943
[dripping]
996
00:49:48,194 --> 00:49:51,780
The back of your family's van
with no explanation whatsoever?
997
00:49:51,989 --> 00:49:54,617
I'm just a simple
speech language pathologist.
998
00:49:54,825 --> 00:49:56,311
I work with children,
999
00:49:56,481 --> 00:49:58,621
gooey little goblins
are not in my purview.
1000
00:49:58,829 --> 00:49:59,872
Goblins?
1001
00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:02,249
It's not like he came
with an instruction manual.
1002
00:50:02,458 --> 00:50:04,437
- [Davidson] Let's get a look.
- Whoa, hey!
1003
00:50:04,507 --> 00:50:05,641
[woman] That's an interesting specimen.
1004
00:50:05,711 --> 00:50:08,923
Wow. Claire Sinclair-Dugan.
In the flesh!
1005
00:50:09,131 --> 00:50:10,841
Long time no see.
1006
00:50:11,050 --> 00:50:13,052
[together] You should see the other guy!
1007
00:50:13,260 --> 00:50:15,721
[Claire] B.B., you son of a bitch.
1008
00:50:15,930 --> 00:50:18,516
I haven't seen you since I got hitched
to this bag of bones.
1009
00:50:18,724 --> 00:50:20,111
[Brendan] What the crap have you
been doing with yourself,
1010
00:50:20,181 --> 00:50:21,532
you old sack of shit?
1011
00:50:21,602 --> 00:50:23,979
Same shit, different day,
you lanky shitty bitch.
1012
00:50:24,230 --> 00:50:24,980
Language, please.
1013
00:50:25,189 --> 00:50:27,733
[Claire] You're looking
at the Aleister Crowley endowed chair
1014
00:50:27,942 --> 00:50:29,401
of interdisciplinary occultism.
1015
00:50:29,610 --> 00:50:30,152
Impressive.
1016
00:50:30,361 --> 00:50:31,792
[Claire]
It's not all it's cracked up to be.
1017
00:50:31,862 --> 00:50:33,404
I can only accept
a couple of grad students.
1018
00:50:33,474 --> 00:50:34,503
[Brendan] Oh, bummer.
1019
00:50:34,573 --> 00:50:36,575
My travel funding's been slashed.
1020
00:50:36,784 --> 00:50:36,992
Bummer.
1021
00:50:37,243 --> 00:50:39,370
[Claire] I go to one conference a year,
if I'm lucky.
1022
00:50:39,578 --> 00:50:40,329
[Brendan] I'm sorry to hear that.
1023
00:50:40,538 --> 00:50:43,499
The field is clogged
by these parapsychologist dildos
1024
00:50:43,707 --> 00:50:45,584
looking for a reality TV show.
1025
00:50:45,793 --> 00:50:47,836
Dildos you say?
That sounds fascinating.
1026
00:50:48,045 --> 00:50:50,285
- Don't worry Hoagie, I won't hurt you.
- [Hoagie] Dildo!
1027
00:50:50,464 --> 00:50:51,465
[Hoagie] No! Oww!
1028
00:50:51,674 --> 00:50:52,674
[Brendan] The occult?
1029
00:50:52,800 --> 00:50:56,762
That's like demons, witchcraft, goblins?
1030
00:50:56,971 --> 00:50:59,640
[Claire]
In the simplest of layman's terms, yes.
1031
00:50:59,848 --> 00:51:02,643
But you don't think Hoagie
has anything to do with that occult
1032
00:51:02,851 --> 00:51:03,936
evil stuff, right?
1033
00:51:04,144 --> 00:51:07,982
Let's see what Davidson's findings yield
before we jump to any rash conclusions.
1034
00:51:08,190 --> 00:51:08,566
All right now,
1035
00:51:08,774 --> 00:51:11,026
this might be a little bit cold.
1036
00:51:11,235 --> 00:51:13,237
[Hoagie] Uh! Oww! Oww!
1037
00:51:13,445 --> 00:51:13,737
Cold!
1038
00:51:13,946 --> 00:51:15,586
Sorry about that, buddy.
You're being so good.
1039
00:51:15,656 --> 00:51:16,656
[Hoagie] Noo!
1040
00:51:16,740 --> 00:51:18,214
[Brendan]
Hoagie's gotta be some kind of,
1041
00:51:18,284 --> 00:51:21,453
an animal, like a,
highly intelligent sloth.
1042
00:51:21,662 --> 00:51:23,219
Some kind of slow loris?
[beeping thermometer]
1043
00:51:23,289 --> 00:51:25,165
[Hoagie] Uhhhh...
1044
00:51:25,374 --> 00:51:26,584
Absolutely fascinating.
1045
00:51:26,792 --> 00:51:29,211
Hearing Hoagie speak for the first time.
1046
00:51:29,420 --> 00:51:30,909
It's like I was Liam Neeson...
1047
00:51:30,979 --> 00:51:33,257
...and he was Jodie Foster
in the movie Nell.
1048
00:51:33,465 --> 00:51:34,049
[Hoagie] Nell!
1049
00:51:34,258 --> 00:51:36,302
You should have seen the way
his language took off!
1050
00:51:36,510 --> 00:51:38,904
He was hurdling
over developmental milestone...
1051
00:51:38,974 --> 00:51:42,850
...after developmental milestone
like they were fucking breadcrumbs!
1052
00:51:43,058 --> 00:51:46,312
The taxonomy of this being
absolutely confounds me.
1053
00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:48,188
I don't know where to start.
1054
00:51:48,397 --> 00:51:50,691
Davidson, we're old college friends,
1055
00:51:50,899 --> 00:51:52,693
How 'bout you start
by telling me the truth?
1056
00:51:52,901 --> 00:51:54,708
I'll do my best.
It's like nothing I've ever seen.
1057
00:51:54,778 --> 00:51:57,364
Some features are mammalian,
others are reptilian,
1058
00:51:57,573 --> 00:52:00,034
And yet others
still downright other worldy.
1059
00:52:00,242 --> 00:52:01,327
I can say without a doubt
1060
00:52:01,535 --> 00:52:03,700
that this creature, this Hoagie,
1061
00:52:03,770 --> 00:52:05,664
does not exist
within the known fossil record.
1062
00:52:05,873 --> 00:52:08,042
What exactly are you telling us,
Davidson?
1063
00:52:08,250 --> 00:52:10,544
Brendan, I think there's some people
whom you should meet.
1064
00:52:10,753 --> 00:52:11,753
[mysterious electronic a]
1065
00:52:11,920 --> 00:52:14,006
[computer voice] Access granted.
1066
00:52:14,590 --> 00:52:17,273
Brendan, you just happened to arrive
on the day of our annual symposium.
1067
00:52:17,343 --> 00:52:20,971
An assemblage of the brightest minds
in the intersecting fields of mammalogy,
1068
00:52:21,180 --> 00:52:24,475
cryptozoology and the occult.
1069
00:52:24,683 --> 00:52:26,018
[servos and beeping machinery]
1070
00:52:26,226 --> 00:52:27,546
Let me introduce you to the team.
1071
00:52:27,645 --> 00:52:28,729
And let me warn you,
1072
00:52:28,937 --> 00:52:31,398
they're an idiosyncratic
and charming group of misfits
1073
00:52:31,607 --> 00:52:33,609
united by a shared, obscure passion.
1074
00:52:33,817 --> 00:52:34,985
Meet C.J.
1075
00:52:35,194 --> 00:52:37,905
Her field work in the distribution
of supposedly extinct
1076
00:52:38,113 --> 00:52:42,785
hominid sightings is required reading
for any self-respecting cryptozoologist.
1077
00:52:42,993 --> 00:52:44,495
[C.J.] Gun to your head, Van Halen,
1078
00:52:44,703 --> 00:52:45,537
or Van Hagar?
1079
00:52:45,746 --> 00:52:46,830
I gotta say C.J.
1080
00:52:47,039 --> 00:52:51,001
I prefer my rock with a little bit
of that authentic down home soul.
1081
00:52:51,210 --> 00:52:53,003
Bruce Hornsby, Steve Winwood,
1082
00:52:53,212 --> 00:52:57,049
Christopher Cross, Chuck Mangione,
Kenny Wayne Shepherd...
1083
00:52:57,257 --> 00:52:59,468
I can vouch for this guy C.J.
He's pretty cool.
1084
00:52:59,677 --> 00:53:02,715
Xavier Moncrief,
a theoretical zoologist,
1085
00:53:02,885 --> 00:53:04,515
who has become somewhat of a celebrity.
1086
00:53:04,723 --> 00:53:05,974
Wow, celebrity.
1087
00:53:06,183 --> 00:53:10,729
[Davidson] And vocal proponent
of his own infamous empath theory.
1088
00:53:11,605 --> 00:53:13,899
I sense urgency.
1089
00:53:14,108 --> 00:53:16,360
A newly discovered friend.
1090
00:53:16,568 --> 00:53:17,568
You're here for our help.
1091
00:53:17,736 --> 00:53:19,321
Xavier, that's amazing.
1092
00:53:19,530 --> 00:53:20,322
How did you know all that?
1093
00:53:20,531 --> 00:53:24,326
[Xavier] It's the empath theory.
Some humans and animals subconsciously
1094
00:53:24,535 --> 00:53:26,578
reflect the emotions
of those around them.
1095
00:53:26,787 --> 00:53:28,427
Don't get him started
on his bat shit theory.
1096
00:53:28,497 --> 00:53:31,834
These two sometimes forget that
I'm a distinctive individual
1097
00:53:32,042 --> 00:53:34,461
who doesn't mince words
or play by the rules.
1098
00:53:34,670 --> 00:53:35,421
Fantastic.
1099
00:53:35,629 --> 00:53:37,047
Joey Linkowski.
1100
00:53:37,256 --> 00:53:40,718
Just call me Link.
You know I prefer my hacker name.
1101
00:53:40,926 --> 00:53:43,512
Just so happens this kid
with a knack for the hack,
1102
00:53:43,721 --> 00:53:46,890
is also the world expert
in animal cyber appendages.
1103
00:53:47,391 --> 00:53:48,934
Admirable stuff.
1104
00:53:49,143 --> 00:53:50,519
What's up? I'm Link.
1105
00:53:50,728 --> 00:53:51,478
[Brendan] Hello, Links.
1106
00:53:51,687 --> 00:53:53,939
So would you say you're a hacker?
1107
00:53:54,148 --> 00:53:55,607
Basically a hacker.
1108
00:53:55,816 --> 00:53:58,318
And, who are those two guys over there?
1109
00:53:58,527 --> 00:54:01,530
Don't ask, they're total fucking losers.
1110
00:54:01,780 --> 00:54:04,116
They'll pretty much never
be a part of our symposium.
1111
00:54:06,034 --> 00:54:08,328
Why don't you show them
what you brought us, Brendan?
1112
00:54:08,537 --> 00:54:11,081
[Hoagie gurgling]
[pram rattling]
1113
00:54:11,290 --> 00:54:12,708
[Xavier] Very cool.
1114
00:54:12,916 --> 00:54:15,919
- [Hoagie] Oh yeah!
- Everyone, meet Hoagie.
1115
00:54:16,253 --> 00:54:19,256
[mysterious and badass electronic a]
1116
00:54:22,050 --> 00:54:24,887
[Brendan]
These guys didn't waste any time.
1117
00:54:25,095 --> 00:54:26,388
They got right to work.
1118
00:54:26,597 --> 00:54:31,477
Using all of their skills of science,
observation and technology.
1119
00:54:31,685 --> 00:54:33,604
Even computers.
[typing and electronic noises]
1120
00:54:35,522 --> 00:54:38,358
Hoagie wasn't always thrilled.
[fleshy ripping]
1121
00:54:38,567 --> 00:54:42,196
After all, they pricked,
prodded, and probed him,
1122
00:54:42,946 --> 00:54:46,408
In the end there wasn't
a fold of flesh left unturned,
1123
00:54:47,201 --> 00:54:50,204
nor an orifice left un-fingered.
[Hoagie moaning in pain]
1124
00:54:50,412 --> 00:54:52,956
But you couldn't argue with the results.
1125
00:54:53,165 --> 00:54:56,460
Terrific, scientific results.
[assorted digi blips and beeps]
1126
00:55:00,881 --> 00:55:02,341
[servos and robotic noises]
1127
00:55:03,842 --> 00:55:04,842
[harsh glitch]
1128
00:55:05,219 --> 00:55:08,764
[ominous guitar and synth]
1129
00:55:16,021 --> 00:55:18,732
[muffled gunshots]
1130
00:55:20,776 --> 00:55:22,611
[fluttering]
1131
00:55:27,616 --> 00:55:29,451
[engine running]
1132
00:55:30,452 --> 00:55:33,622
[radio] Clearance at Gate 1.
1133
00:55:33,997 --> 00:55:35,833
[electric gate]
1134
00:55:37,209 --> 00:55:39,086
[muted gunshots]
[dog barks]
1135
00:55:39,294 --> 00:55:44,007
[radio chatter]
1136
00:55:44,842 --> 00:55:46,009
[Dog barks]
1137
00:55:46,218 --> 00:55:49,555
[radio chatter]
1138
00:55:52,432 --> 00:55:54,268
[gravel sliding]
1139
00:55:54,810 --> 00:55:56,520
Move your ass!
1140
00:55:56,728 --> 00:55:59,314
I was stacking slopes like cord wood
1141
00:55:59,565 --> 00:56:02,651
before you cheese-dicks were even sperm!
1142
00:56:03,402 --> 00:56:06,530
You don't deserve the name Promised Men!
1143
00:56:07,698 --> 00:56:10,158
[Man] Move your ass, you punks!
1144
00:56:10,367 --> 00:56:13,412
Let's see if you've got any gravel
in your guts!
1145
00:56:19,376 --> 00:56:20,586
[back slap]
1146
00:56:28,176 --> 00:56:31,054
- Careful there, you'll...
- [child] I have to get down...
1147
00:56:31,263 --> 00:56:34,558
- Oh my god, well that's, be careful!
- I am...
1148
00:56:34,766 --> 00:56:36,560
You don't want to hurt yourself there.
1149
00:56:38,562 --> 00:56:41,523
[Benny on recording] Breathe with me.
1150
00:56:41,732 --> 00:56:45,027
[Takes deep breath]
1151
00:56:46,862 --> 00:56:47,863
Exhale.
1152
00:56:48,071 --> 00:56:49,907
[Exhales]
1153
00:56:51,742 --> 00:56:55,746
Never forget, you are Benny Piazza,
1154
00:56:55,954 --> 00:57:00,959
A man of great power
and tremendous influence.
1155
00:57:01,168 --> 00:57:06,256
You exert a stalwart and muscular
hold on your subjects.
1156
00:57:06,465 --> 00:57:08,383
They need you.
1157
00:57:08,634 --> 00:57:13,513
Your leadership is a succor
for their weak spirits.
1158
00:57:13,722 --> 00:57:16,266
They are your wounded boys.
1159
00:57:16,475 --> 00:57:19,186
- Your strength is the balm.
- [Dog barks]
1160
00:57:19,394 --> 00:57:20,729
The unguent.
1161
00:57:20,938 --> 00:57:22,940
The poultice which mends,
1162
00:57:23,148 --> 00:57:25,275
and builds them anew.
1163
00:57:25,484 --> 00:57:27,324
- Sshhhhh!
- [Benny recording] You are the rod,
1164
00:57:27,444 --> 00:57:29,404
And the staff.
1165
00:57:29,613 --> 00:57:33,742
Spare the rod, spoil the child.
1166
00:57:33,951 --> 00:57:38,121
Spoiled milk feeds no man.
[tape ends]
1167
00:57:39,039 --> 00:57:40,874
[Benny cassette tape rewinds]
1168
00:57:42,334 --> 00:57:43,627
[Benny groans]
1169
00:57:43,835 --> 00:57:45,671
[twisting lid on mason jar]
1170
00:57:48,590 --> 00:57:49,841
[Benny farts]
1171
00:57:52,469 --> 00:57:54,304
[lid twisting on]
1172
00:58:00,143 --> 00:58:01,561
Spragg my boy,
1173
00:58:01,770 --> 00:58:04,940
find me everything there is to know
about this Brendan Bean character?
1174
00:58:05,148 --> 00:58:08,735
[Spragg] I'm pleased to report
that the guy is 100% square-john,
1175
00:58:08,944 --> 00:58:10,529
soy-boy, lib-tard.
1176
00:58:10,737 --> 00:58:13,657
Low T all the way,
estrogen levels through the roof.
1177
00:58:13,865 --> 00:58:16,952
Moved out to the sticks
with his family not too long ago.
1178
00:58:17,160 --> 00:58:20,038
He teaches simpletons for a job.
1179
00:58:23,917 --> 00:58:25,961
[Spragg] Here he is standing on a porch.
1180
00:58:27,087 --> 00:58:29,631
Here is eating an apple or something.
1181
00:58:29,840 --> 00:58:31,591
What an asshole.
1182
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:34,469
And I got one of him rollerblading.
1183
00:58:34,678 --> 00:58:36,680
Here he is eating shit.
1184
00:58:36,888 --> 00:58:37,888
Wipeout.
1185
00:58:38,015 --> 00:58:39,307
[Benny] Fucking millennials.
1186
00:58:39,516 --> 00:58:43,020
Here's a pic of him
poisoning his body with some weed.
1187
00:58:43,395 --> 00:58:46,356
What other surprises
you got in store for me, Bean?
1188
00:58:46,565 --> 00:58:49,359
[Spragg]
With... with a cat in this picture.
1189
00:58:49,568 --> 00:58:52,446
Now that is some cat.
1190
00:58:52,946 --> 00:58:54,781
Magnificent.
1191
00:58:54,990 --> 00:58:58,035
Extraction should be hell a easy.
1192
00:58:58,952 --> 00:59:00,952
You hear that Lucas?
[ominous and mysterious music]
1193
00:59:01,038 --> 00:59:02,998
We'll bring these little shits along,
too.
1194
00:59:03,206 --> 00:59:04,666
They can meet their brother.
1195
00:59:04,875 --> 00:59:06,418
Take a peek, Spragg.
[liquid gush]
1196
00:59:07,044 --> 00:59:10,922
These are Benny's bastard homunculi.
1197
00:59:11,131 --> 00:59:14,134
Failures in every way.
[homunculi coo and mumble]
1198
00:59:14,718 --> 00:59:17,846
In every respect that Hoagie
is a divine masterpiece,
1199
00:59:18,055 --> 00:59:20,849
these are abject failures.
1200
00:59:21,058 --> 00:59:23,310
Gestation period was off.
1201
00:59:23,518 --> 00:59:25,520
Some of 'em had too much jizz.
1202
00:59:25,771 --> 00:59:26,938
Others not enough.
1203
00:59:28,982 --> 00:59:31,777
Basically, a bunch of fucking retards.
1204
00:59:31,985 --> 00:59:34,321
Shut up. Shut up!
Shut the fuck up!
1205
00:59:34,529 --> 00:59:35,781
Shut up! Shut up!
1206
00:59:35,989 --> 00:59:38,992
I told you to fucking...
Shut up when I'm talkin' to you!
1207
00:59:40,702 --> 00:59:42,704
Trickster. Ohhhbh...
1208
00:59:42,913 --> 00:59:43,997
Cunning little shit.
1209
00:59:44,206 --> 00:59:47,334
And Blast-Face.
He's as ugly as he is tough.
1210
00:59:47,542 --> 00:59:48,835
And finally...
1211
00:59:49,044 --> 00:59:50,837
Female Hoagie.
1212
00:59:51,129 --> 00:59:52,923
Do not be fooled...
1213
00:59:53,131 --> 00:59:55,342
by her beauty or feminine wiles.
1214
00:59:55,550 --> 00:59:57,511
She's a bitch.
1215
00:59:57,719 --> 00:59:58,984
And the only one in the lot of them,
1216
00:59:59,054 --> 01:00:00,388
that's worth a damn thing,
1217
01:00:00,597 --> 01:00:03,141
was stolen from my clutches.
1218
01:00:03,350 --> 01:00:05,644
It's time for a family reunion.
1219
01:00:05,852 --> 01:00:07,646
[Davidson]
We've concluded our assessment.
1220
01:00:07,854 --> 01:00:09,661
Brendan, I'm sure you won't be
surprised to hear
1221
01:00:09,731 --> 01:00:12,651
that what we found
is nothing short of extraordinary.
1222
01:00:12,859 --> 01:00:14,569
First, we took a biological inventory.
1223
01:00:14,820 --> 01:00:17,280
According to my calculations,
1224
01:00:17,489 --> 01:00:20,408
Hoagie's vision is at 20/20.
1225
01:00:20,617 --> 01:00:22,744
But he has a visual acuity of, say,
1226
01:00:22,953 --> 01:00:24,329
your common house-cat.
1227
01:00:24,538 --> 01:00:27,666
[Xavier] His olfactory and gustatory
systems are highly advanced.
1228
01:00:27,874 --> 01:00:31,211
The tendons in arms and feet
have fuzed themselves to the bone,
1229
01:00:31,419 --> 01:00:34,923
giving him the strength and agility
of the world's buff est wolverine.
1230
01:00:35,132 --> 01:00:38,218
Hoagie's circulatory system
rejects raw vegetation,
1231
01:00:38,426 --> 01:00:40,734
which explains the mess
we had in the front yard this morning.
1232
01:00:40,804 --> 01:00:44,224
I'm currently analyzing a stool sample
from this morning's excretion.
1233
01:00:44,683 --> 01:00:46,226
So far it contains,
1234
01:00:46,434 --> 01:00:48,854
seven different elements
unknown to science.
1235
01:00:49,062 --> 01:00:50,062
Let me play this film.
1236
01:00:50,647 --> 01:00:52,107
[projector clicks]
[film whirring]
1237
01:00:52,649 --> 01:00:53,649
[two-pop]
1238
01:00:55,777 --> 01:00:58,196
[Narrator] What is a homunculus?
1239
01:00:58,405 --> 01:01:02,117
In the 16th century,
the alchemist known as Paracelsus,
1240
01:01:02,325 --> 01:01:06,246
explored the phenomena
and outlined it in his seminal work,
1241
01:01:06,872 --> 01:01:09,875
De Natura Rerum.
1242
01:01:10,250 --> 01:01:14,462
Had he achieved the creation
of a miniature, fully formed human?
1243
01:01:14,671 --> 01:01:20,135
One which, once imprinted on its master,
bestowed great power and abilities?
1244
01:01:20,343 --> 01:01:22,721
Paracelsus outlined it thus,
1245
01:01:22,929 --> 01:01:26,222
"That the sperm of a man
be putrefied by itself...
1246
01:01:26,292 --> 01:01:29,102
"...in a sealed cucurbit for 40 days.
1247
01:01:29,311 --> 01:01:32,772
A living, human child grows therefrom."
1248
01:01:32,981 --> 01:01:36,400
Once a homunculi
has bonded with its master...
1249
01:01:36,470 --> 01:01:39,446
...its potential knows no bounds.
1250
01:01:41,114 --> 01:01:42,114
[projector turns off]
1251
01:01:42,490 --> 01:01:45,493
It's a lot to digest.
1252
01:01:45,702 --> 01:01:46,702
[pram squeaks]
1253
01:01:46,870 --> 01:01:48,385
[Brendan] Armed with all this knowledge,
1254
01:01:48,455 --> 01:01:52,334
I knew, Hoagie and I
were well on our way to...
1255
01:01:52,542 --> 01:01:54,753
Oh, shit. What now?
1256
01:01:54,961 --> 01:01:56,351
Whoa mister, what are you doing here?
1257
01:01:56,421 --> 01:01:57,088
Hello, young lady.
1258
01:01:57,297 --> 01:02:00,133
To tell you the truth,
I'm not even sure where here is.
1259
01:02:00,342 --> 01:02:01,968
We both must look pretty lost.
1260
01:02:02,177 --> 01:02:03,511
Give me a cigarette, old man.
1261
01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:04,930
Our street, our rules.
1262
01:02:05,138 --> 01:02:07,682
I-I don't smoke
and you already have a cigarette.
1263
01:02:07,891 --> 01:02:08,971
I like having lots of them.
1264
01:02:09,059 --> 01:02:10,894
So give me a dollar
you geriatric old fossil.
1265
01:02:11,102 --> 01:02:11,895
[squelch]
1266
01:02:12,103 --> 01:02:14,356
[Hoagie grunting]
1267
01:02:14,564 --> 01:02:16,066
Your baby's weird and slimy.
1268
01:02:16,274 --> 01:02:17,274
He sucks balls.
1269
01:02:17,442 --> 01:02:19,541
- [Hoagie] Balls!?
- [teen] Ugh, like, gag me with a spoon.
1270
01:02:19,611 --> 01:02:21,446
That baby's fucking nasty, I hate it.
1271
01:02:21,655 --> 01:02:23,406
Like, what in the actual fuck?
1272
01:02:23,615 --> 01:02:25,617
Cool burn victim baby, not!
1273
01:02:25,825 --> 01:02:27,705
That baby looks like
it's been turned inside out
1274
01:02:27,869 --> 01:02:29,788
and plucked out of a boomer's ass.
1275
01:02:29,996 --> 01:02:30,330
H-How rude.
1276
01:02:30,538 --> 01:02:32,058
He looks like Freddy Krueger's weiner.
1277
01:02:32,165 --> 01:02:33,291
Weiner?
1278
01:02:35,252 --> 01:02:36,294
[Brenden] No, no!
1279
01:02:36,503 --> 01:02:36,836
[splattering liquid]
1280
01:02:37,045 --> 01:02:38,713
[teen] Oops! My bad, fucked up baby.
1281
01:02:38,964 --> 01:02:40,520
Just stay away from him you mean girls!
1282
01:02:40,590 --> 01:02:42,676
- Come on Hoagie!
- [Hoagie] Cold!
1283
01:02:43,218 --> 01:02:44,649
- [teen] Bath-time for barf-baby.
- [Hoagie] Sad!
1284
01:02:44,719 --> 01:02:46,179
[teens chortle]
1285
01:02:46,388 --> 01:02:48,848
[Hoagie] Brendan! Bean!
1286
01:02:50,225 --> 01:02:54,854
[Hoagie moaning]
1287
01:02:56,106 --> 01:02:57,774
[squishy wipe]
1288
01:02:58,024 --> 01:03:00,735
Just...
just ignore those mean girls, Hoagie.
1289
01:03:00,986 --> 01:03:02,195
They're bullies, plain as day.
1290
01:03:02,404 --> 01:03:03,571
Bullies?!
1291
01:03:03,780 --> 01:03:06,491
- Yeah, yeah, bullies, Hoagie.
- [Hoagie] Why!?
1292
01:03:06,700 --> 01:03:08,368
[Brendan] Some people...
1293
01:03:08,576 --> 01:03:10,412
How can I put this?
1294
01:03:10,620 --> 01:03:13,081
Some people are just mean
to one another,
1295
01:03:13,290 --> 01:03:16,960
but usually it's because
they don't feel good about themselves.
1296
01:03:17,168 --> 01:03:19,421
But we can't let them make us feel bad.
1297
01:03:19,629 --> 01:03:21,840
We got to show them
that our beauty's on the inside.
1298
01:03:22,048 --> 01:03:23,383
Inside!
1299
01:03:23,591 --> 01:03:25,260
There, good as new.
1300
01:03:27,387 --> 01:03:28,680
[Hoagie farts]
1301
01:03:28,888 --> 01:03:30,932
Uughh. Jeez Hoagie.
1302
01:03:31,141 --> 01:03:31,891
Sorry.
1303
01:03:32,100 --> 01:03:34,352
[automatic gunfire]
1304
01:03:34,561 --> 01:03:39,941
[Man] Let's see if you peckerwoods
got any gravel in yer fuckin' guts!
1305
01:03:40,150 --> 01:03:44,070
[gunshots]
[hits, ricochets and whizzes]
1306
01:03:45,322 --> 01:03:47,991
[gunshots]
[shell casings clatter]
1307
01:03:48,199 --> 01:03:50,452
[intense music]
1308
01:03:51,244 --> 01:03:52,287
Sprag Hun?
1309
01:03:52,495 --> 01:03:54,247
Get the Madera boys on the horn,
1310
01:03:54,456 --> 01:03:56,596
and let 'em know we're coming
with everything we've got.
1311
01:03:56,666 --> 01:03:58,626
- You've got it.
- Babcock!
1312
01:03:58,835 --> 01:04:00,712
Ease down on that fire!
1313
01:04:01,463 --> 01:04:03,214
Promised Men! To me!
1314
01:04:03,423 --> 01:04:04,966
Hennessy? Hennessy!
1315
01:04:05,175 --> 01:04:06,801
Bogardus! To me!
1316
01:04:07,010 --> 01:04:09,179
I have kicked down enough doors
and windows in my time,
1317
01:04:09,387 --> 01:04:11,264
and I do not want
to have to do it again!
1318
01:04:11,473 --> 01:04:12,474
I want to thank you all,
1319
01:04:12,682 --> 01:04:14,809
for everything you have done
to your bodies!
1320
01:04:15,060 --> 01:04:16,811
It's still real to me, dammit!
1321
01:04:17,020 --> 01:04:19,773
Lucas!
Let's go get one of our prisoners.
1322
01:04:19,981 --> 01:04:23,360
I intend to arouse us
into some form of action!
1323
01:04:23,568 --> 01:04:24,736
No matter what it takes!
1324
01:04:24,944 --> 01:04:25,944
C'm on!
1325
01:04:29,783 --> 01:04:31,201
Time to wake up, my friends!
1326
01:04:31,409 --> 01:04:33,453
We cannot be just sleeping all the day,
1327
01:04:33,661 --> 01:04:35,038
wasting this life away.
1328
01:04:35,246 --> 01:04:36,581
Come out to meet your family!
1329
01:04:36,790 --> 01:04:37,790
Oh!
1330
01:04:37,874 --> 01:04:39,084
This place smells like shit!
1331
01:04:39,292 --> 01:04:40,668
Yes, yes Lord Benny.
1332
01:04:40,777 --> 01:04:42,934
Thank you for this project
you give to me. [flies buzzing]
1333
01:04:43,004 --> 01:04:46,049
These prisoners
have become to me like family.
1334
01:04:46,257 --> 01:04:47,257
I care for them.
1335
01:04:47,384 --> 01:04:48,551
I treat them well.
1336
01:04:48,760 --> 01:04:50,929
You see,
I give them buckets to defecate.
1337
01:04:51,137 --> 01:04:52,597
This is like dream come true to me.
1338
01:04:52,806 --> 01:04:53,806
Well...
1339
01:04:54,265 --> 01:04:55,600
what do we have here, Lucas?
1340
01:04:55,809 --> 01:04:58,645
Here we have librarian from school,
1341
01:04:58,853 --> 01:05:03,149
and, bursar from the same institution,
Lord Benny.
1342
01:05:04,984 --> 01:05:07,737
The Promised Men find this one guilty.
1343
01:05:07,946 --> 01:05:10,949
Guilty as charged.
1344
01:05:12,200 --> 01:05:13,618
[captive moans]
1345
01:05:14,911 --> 01:05:17,914
[Benny] Bring him to the execution spot.
1346
01:05:18,415 --> 01:05:21,084
[Bogardus]
Yeah, serves the fucker right.
1347
01:05:21,626 --> 01:05:23,503
Time to go now, Jellybean.
1348
01:05:23,711 --> 01:05:24,711
Meet again soon.
1349
01:05:24,796 --> 01:05:25,171
Soon?
1350
01:05:25,380 --> 01:05:28,258
[Lucas] Hope to meet again soon!
1351
01:05:28,466 --> 01:05:29,008
[woman] Jellybean...
1352
01:05:29,217 --> 01:05:30,885
Good to get to know you, Jellybean.
1353
01:05:31,136 --> 01:05:31,594
[woman] Jellybean.
1354
01:05:31,803 --> 01:05:34,347
This is you. Yes, Jellybean.
1355
01:05:34,556 --> 01:05:36,474
Time to go now.
1356
01:05:36,724 --> 01:05:37,767
[shuffling footsteps]
1357
01:05:37,976 --> 01:05:40,979
[Lucas] Go now.
1358
01:05:41,396 --> 01:05:44,399
[intense music]
[radio chatter]
1359
01:06:07,547 --> 01:06:08,547
[light thwacking]
1360
01:06:08,673 --> 01:06:09,799
[muted splashes]
1361
01:06:11,176 --> 01:06:11,926
[thud]
1362
01:06:12,135 --> 01:06:13,135
What's your name?
1363
01:06:13,261 --> 01:06:14,261
Lloyd.
1364
01:06:14,429 --> 01:06:16,055
Is that short for "mongoloid?"
1365
01:06:16,264 --> 01:06:16,931
[laughter]
1366
01:06:17,140 --> 01:06:18,349
[Lloyd] My name is Lloyd Gray.
1367
01:06:18,558 --> 01:06:19,726
I'm a Christian man.
1368
01:06:19,934 --> 01:06:20,934
I got a family,
1369
01:06:21,019 --> 01:06:22,103
and I got a soul...
1370
01:06:22,312 --> 01:06:23,312
[metallic impact]
Urgh!
1371
01:06:25,565 --> 01:06:28,026
Eh!
Jeez look at that pumpkin head swell!
1372
01:06:28,234 --> 01:06:30,236
- [Promised Man] Nice one!
- [Benny] Okay...
1373
01:06:30,445 --> 01:06:32,906
Who wants to finish
this leftist piece of shit?
1374
01:06:33,114 --> 01:06:34,240
- Me!
- I got him!
1375
01:06:34,449 --> 01:06:36,951
No, no, no. You've all had your turn.
1376
01:06:37,202 --> 01:06:38,495
Where's Walter?
1377
01:06:38,703 --> 01:06:40,830
He's not yet been blooded.
1378
01:06:41,039 --> 01:06:43,639
- [Benny] Go fetch the boy.
- [Promised Man] Hey, where's Walter!?
1379
01:06:43,750 --> 01:06:45,168
Fuck's going on?
1380
01:06:45,376 --> 01:06:47,128
[Promised Man] There's the little guy.
1381
01:06:47,337 --> 01:06:50,340
[Spragg] That's like, a little kid.
1382
01:06:51,341 --> 01:06:52,967
Oh, there you are, young man.
1383
01:06:53,176 --> 01:06:54,706
Step forward, boy,
1384
01:06:54,776 --> 01:06:57,388
time for you to nut up
and get some hair on that sack.
1385
01:06:57,639 --> 01:06:58,973
Hey there, young man.
1386
01:06:59,224 --> 01:07:00,224
Lucas!
1387
01:07:00,308 --> 01:07:03,686
Come bring us one of those gizmos
you're so proud of!
1388
01:07:04,145 --> 01:07:04,896
[Promised Man] Here comes Lucas.
1389
01:07:05,104 --> 01:07:09,025
Damn Lucas, all tactical and practical.
1390
01:07:09,275 --> 01:07:10,275
[Funlatching]
1391
01:07:10,485 --> 01:07:11,925
[Promised Men exclaim in admiration]
1392
01:07:12,111 --> 01:07:13,738
It's time to have a big day here.
1393
01:07:13,947 --> 01:07:17,617
[radio]
Lucas has arrived at the execution spot.
1394
01:07:17,825 --> 01:07:19,728
[Lucas]
This is part, is, not my favorite.
1395
01:07:19,798 --> 01:07:20,967
[Promised Men chortle and guffaw]
1396
01:07:21,037 --> 01:07:23,665
This part, disgusting to me.
1397
01:07:23,873 --> 01:07:26,167
Homosexual. Why do I do this?
1398
01:07:26,376 --> 01:07:27,627
I explain.
[squelching]
1399
01:07:27,835 --> 01:07:30,004
Dildo-bomb, as designed,
1400
01:07:30,213 --> 01:07:31,673
to explode anal cavity...
1401
01:07:31,881 --> 01:07:32,882
[Lucas grunting]
1402
01:07:33,091 --> 01:07:35,343
Must be inserted rectally.
1403
01:07:35,552 --> 01:07:37,011
There is no other way.
1404
01:07:37,220 --> 01:07:39,722
Sodomy, an abomination, yes?
1405
01:07:39,931 --> 01:07:41,641
Not my preference.
1406
01:07:41,849 --> 01:07:44,644
There is no other way.
1407
01:07:44,852 --> 01:07:46,020
[Spragg] Oh, Lord.
1408
01:07:46,271 --> 01:07:48,408
[Promised Man] Lucas is one sick puppy.
1409
01:07:48,478 --> 01:07:49,999
[Spragg] I didn't sign up for that.
1410
01:07:50,108 --> 01:07:51,651
Okay, young squit.
1411
01:07:51,859 --> 01:07:54,699
Walter,
my state of the art dildo-bomb...
1412
01:07:54,779 --> 01:07:57,699
...is fully inserted
and ready for detonation.
1413
01:07:57,907 --> 01:07:59,547
- [Walter] Cool!
- And you push that little trigger.
1414
01:07:59,617 --> 01:08:02,787
It's gonna make Lucas'
state-of-the-art dildo-bomb explode.
1415
01:08:02,996 --> 01:08:04,956
[Spragg]
Kid's like three years old dude.
1416
01:08:05,164 --> 01:08:07,375
[Promised Man] Way to man up, Walter!
1417
01:08:08,126 --> 01:08:09,126
[powerful explosion]
1418
01:08:09,294 --> 01:08:09,794
[squishy slap]
1419
01:08:10,003 --> 01:08:11,754
[Promised Men cheer]
1420
01:08:11,963 --> 01:08:13,590
[intense music]
1421
01:08:13,923 --> 01:08:16,342
- [Promised Man] He ain't laughin' now!
- [Cheering]
1422
01:08:16,551 --> 01:08:18,191
[Promised Man]
That's gonna leave a mark!
1423
01:08:19,304 --> 01:08:20,304
[chambering round]
1424
01:08:20,597 --> 01:08:21,597
[gunshot]
[yelp]
1425
01:08:22,307 --> 01:08:24,726
The revolution starts here!
1426
01:08:25,393 --> 01:08:26,393
Move with purpose!
1427
01:08:26,477 --> 01:08:27,312
It's go time, ladies.
1428
01:08:27,520 --> 01:08:28,980
Pack your shit!
1429
01:08:29,188 --> 01:08:31,024
We will move on Brendan Bean,
1430
01:08:31,232 --> 01:08:32,632
and then we will collect my Hoagie,
1431
01:08:32,734 --> 01:08:35,236
and your names
will be written in history!
1432
01:08:35,737 --> 01:08:37,447
[radio] Viking Six and Saber Team,
1433
01:08:37,655 --> 01:08:39,282
We are moving out.
1434
01:08:40,408 --> 01:08:43,411
We're going on a little
road trip, ladies.
1435
01:08:47,457 --> 01:08:49,125
[checking and loading guns]
1436
01:08:51,127 --> 01:08:51,919
[Radio] Benny!
1437
01:08:52,128 --> 01:08:53,796
Benny, this is Benteen.
1438
01:08:54,005 --> 01:08:55,089
Get back to me!
1439
01:08:55,298 --> 01:08:59,093
This old cowboy desperado
has seen his last rodeo.
1440
01:08:59,344 --> 01:09:00,887
I wish I could ride with you again.
1441
01:09:01,095 --> 01:09:03,056
But it's time to hang up my spurs.
1442
01:09:03,264 --> 01:09:04,807
Vaya con dios, Blanco.
1443
01:09:05,016 --> 01:09:06,809
Benteen...
1444
01:09:07,268 --> 01:09:10,897
You are a gleaming testament
to the white race,
1445
01:09:11,105 --> 01:09:13,024
A great killer of men,
1446
01:09:13,232 --> 01:09:18,488
and a towering force of devastation,
this world has not seen since Attila
1447
01:09:18,696 --> 01:09:24,369
and his unruly Huns
held dominion over Central Asia.
1448
01:09:24,827 --> 01:09:27,330
Take care of the compound.
1449
01:09:27,538 --> 01:09:30,416
You have the con, my old friend.
1450
01:09:30,625 --> 01:09:31,292
Benny!
1451
01:09:31,501 --> 01:09:32,877
Benny, are you there?
1452
01:09:33,086 --> 01:09:34,086
Losing you god dammit!
1453
01:09:34,253 --> 01:09:36,089
Benny, where the hell are you?
1454
01:09:36,297 --> 01:09:36,714
Answer!
1455
01:09:36,923 --> 01:09:37,965
[Benteen] Pick up!
1456
01:09:39,384 --> 01:09:40,384
[engine]
1457
01:09:40,760 --> 01:09:42,470
I know you!
1458
01:09:42,679 --> 01:09:45,014
This is nice woman I talk to!
1459
01:09:45,223 --> 01:09:47,308
[Benny] Lucas,
what are you harpin' on about?!
1460
01:09:49,143 --> 01:09:50,937
[Woman] Jelly... Jellybean...
1461
01:09:51,479 --> 01:09:53,064
Hello!
1462
01:09:53,272 --> 01:09:56,067
It's good to see you again so soon!
1463
01:09:56,275 --> 01:09:58,528
You remember me!?
1464
01:09:58,736 --> 01:10:00,655
It was nice to be meeting you!
1465
01:10:00,863 --> 01:10:01,863
Ahhhh!
1466
01:10:02,865 --> 01:10:03,865
[squelching thud]
1467
01:10:05,660 --> 01:10:06,869
[van engine]
1468
01:10:07,495 --> 01:10:10,665
[radio chatter]
1469
01:10:12,834 --> 01:10:14,252
[radio] Copy that Viking One.
1470
01:10:14,460 --> 01:10:17,130
We are collecting the bastard homunculi.
1471
01:10:17,338 --> 01:10:19,674
Preparing them for transportation.
1472
01:10:22,218 --> 01:10:24,762
[Hoagie cooing]
1473
01:10:24,971 --> 01:10:26,139
Go!
1474
01:10:26,723 --> 01:10:28,141
[Brendan] All righty, Hoagie.
1475
01:10:28,349 --> 01:10:29,016
Here we are.
1476
01:10:29,225 --> 01:10:31,310
Home sweet home.
1477
01:10:32,228 --> 01:10:32,895
[teapot whistle]
1478
01:10:33,104 --> 01:10:34,104
[pouring]
1479
01:10:34,480 --> 01:10:36,733
[Brendan]
This hot tea is just what I need.
1480
01:10:36,941 --> 01:10:38,021
[Hoagie] Hot tea! Yum yum.
1481
01:10:38,192 --> 01:10:41,070
[Brendan]
Sorry, Hoagie, it's got caffeine.
1482
01:10:42,572 --> 01:10:43,197
[Hoagie grumbling]
1483
01:10:43,406 --> 01:10:46,242
[Brendan] Oh,
I got a voicemail from Davidson Dugan.
1484
01:10:47,577 --> 01:10:49,871
[Hoagie] Davidson Dugan?
1485
01:10:50,288 --> 01:10:52,623
[Davidson] Boy, I sure hope
you get this message in time.
1486
01:10:52,832 --> 01:10:54,417
Link just filled the team in.
1487
01:10:54,625 --> 01:10:58,296
There's been lots of chatter
on several subreddits about homunculi,
1488
01:10:58,504 --> 01:11:00,965
Matching the very same
physical makeup as our Hoagie.
1489
01:11:01,174 --> 01:11:03,100
A group calling themselves
the Promised Men...
1490
01:11:03,180 --> 01:11:04,469
...have been raving about it.
1491
01:11:04,677 --> 01:11:06,107
They're led by a foul,
1492
01:11:06,177 --> 01:11:09,599
nasty man who calls himself
Benny Piazza.
1493
01:11:09,807 --> 01:11:12,226
Here, I forwarded you
the latest video postings.
1494
01:11:12,477 --> 01:11:14,207
Brendan, I must warn you,
1495
01:11:14,277 --> 01:11:17,857
he seems dangerous
and completely irrational.
1496
01:11:18,065 --> 01:11:22,278
[commercial] Tired of those
other guys burgers with no sauce?
1497
01:11:23,237 --> 01:11:26,991
The fatty patty six-stack
is back in big way.
1498
01:11:27,200 --> 01:11:30,077
Go to town with our signature
brown sauce.
1499
01:11:30,286 --> 01:11:31,662
More brown sauce.
1500
01:11:31,871 --> 01:11:35,041
You only live once, don't hold back.
1501
01:11:35,249 --> 01:11:37,752
You didn't forget the beans-can,
didja boys?
1502
01:11:37,960 --> 01:11:42,006
Anderson Valley Ranch, it is so good.
1503
01:11:42,215 --> 01:11:45,676
[Benny] A lot of people ask me,
Benny, how are you so strong?
1504
01:11:45,885 --> 01:11:46,594
[man grunts in pain]
1505
01:11:46,803 --> 01:11:48,721
[Brendan] Benny Piazza?
1506
01:11:48,930 --> 01:11:51,516
[Benny] Health is an essential
tenant of the Promised Men.
1507
01:11:51,724 --> 01:11:53,559
And with the Promised Men's
protein power,
1508
01:11:53,768 --> 01:11:58,922
with BCAAs, electrolyte amino acids,
triglycerides, and adaptogens...
1509
01:11:58,992 --> 01:12:00,691
Grow strong!
1510
01:12:01,651 --> 01:12:02,707
Our protein is on a hundred percent...
1511
01:12:02,777 --> 01:12:05,279
[Brendan] Okay, this guy's weird.
1512
01:12:05,488 --> 01:12:07,615
[Benny] Pure whey. No way. You got it.
1513
01:12:07,824 --> 01:12:10,076
We got amino branch...
1514
01:12:10,284 --> 01:12:12,314
I don't care if you use full stem
or non-stem pre,
1515
01:12:12,384 --> 01:12:14,038
but you gotta get that pump.
1516
01:12:14,247 --> 01:12:16,457
The pursuit of the pump
with the mind-muscle connection,
1517
01:12:16,666 --> 01:12:19,001
ls what the Promised Men are all about.
1518
01:12:19,210 --> 01:12:21,295
We don't use roids around here.
But we...
1519
01:12:21,504 --> 01:12:23,548
[Hoagie] It's fun.
1520
01:12:24,257 --> 01:12:27,134
Well, this guy seems
like a complete lunatic.
1521
01:12:27,343 --> 01:12:31,389
Lucky thing he has no idea where we are,
who I am, or how to find us.
1522
01:12:31,597 --> 01:12:32,974
Come on, Hoagie.
1523
01:12:33,182 --> 01:12:33,933
Let's get to bed.
1524
01:12:34,141 --> 01:12:34,892
[Hoagie] Bedtime?
1525
01:12:35,101 --> 01:12:37,854
I have located the homunculus,
Brendan Bean.
1526
01:12:38,062 --> 01:12:40,439
I know who you are.
1527
01:12:40,648 --> 01:12:42,316
I know where you hide.
1528
01:12:42,567 --> 01:12:44,720
And while you cower in fear
have no doubt...
1529
01:12:44,790 --> 01:12:46,320
...that my forces are gathering.
1530
01:12:46,529 --> 01:12:48,500
And we will fall upon you,
1531
01:12:48,570 --> 01:12:51,868
with all of our fury
and all of our arsenal.
1532
01:12:52,076 --> 01:12:54,745
I will wipe you and your seed
from this earth,
1533
01:12:54,954 --> 01:12:56,873
and reclaim what is rightfully mine.
1534
01:12:57,081 --> 01:12:59,041
Your days are numbered, Bean.
1535
01:12:59,250 --> 01:12:59,750
Get it?
1536
01:12:59,959 --> 01:13:01,878
[ominous guitar twangs]
1537
01:13:04,046 --> 01:13:05,923
[man sighs]
[gasoline glugs]
1538
01:13:06,841 --> 01:13:08,301
Takes forever.
1539
01:13:08,676 --> 01:13:10,845
[birds chatter]
1540
01:13:12,346 --> 01:13:14,515
Mmmm, breakfast.
1541
01:13:14,724 --> 01:13:15,933
[ignition]
1542
01:13:16,142 --> 01:13:17,852
[lawnmower]
1543
01:13:21,856 --> 01:13:23,399
[peeling]
1544
01:13:24,233 --> 01:13:24,692
Mmmm.
1545
01:13:25,067 --> 01:13:26,611
[ominous guitar twangs]
1546
01:13:31,324 --> 01:13:32,658
You ready over there, Lucas?
1547
01:13:32,867 --> 01:13:34,160
Yes, Lord Benny.
1548
01:13:34,368 --> 01:13:37,330
You know this man eat egg for breakfast?
[moist egg bite]
1549
01:13:41,667 --> 01:13:43,461
We may have underestimated this one.
1550
01:13:44,420 --> 01:13:45,620
We're gonna move on my signal.
1551
01:13:45,713 --> 01:13:48,674
Stay focused, no theatrics.
1552
01:13:50,384 --> 01:13:51,928
[babbling brook]
1553
01:13:54,639 --> 01:13:56,265
[man] Didn't get my 40 winks last night.
1554
01:13:56,474 --> 01:13:58,309
My sciatica's giving me hell.
1555
01:13:58,893 --> 01:14:00,561
Sounds like a herniated disc.
1556
01:14:00,770 --> 01:14:03,356
Any time I eat too much,
my nose gets a little runny.
1557
01:14:03,564 --> 01:14:04,982
Okay. Let's move, Lucas.
1558
01:14:05,191 --> 01:14:06,191
Staggered formation.
1559
01:14:06,275 --> 01:14:09,487
Steak dinner to the man
that brings me Bean alive.
1560
01:14:10,571 --> 01:14:12,698
[badass assault music]
1561
01:14:15,534 --> 01:14:17,536
[Benny] Saber team on my mark, go.
1562
01:14:17,745 --> 01:14:20,039
Go! Move, move, move.
1563
01:14:21,248 --> 01:14:23,292
[grass rustling]
[footsteps]
1564
01:14:25,670 --> 01:14:27,213
[Benny] Saber Team, converge on Bean.
1565
01:14:27,421 --> 01:14:29,131
Move, move, move!
1566
01:14:32,718 --> 01:14:33,970
Lucas, no witnesses.
1567
01:14:34,178 --> 01:14:36,514
Take the neighbor
out of commission ASAP.
1568
01:14:37,807 --> 01:14:39,225
[gunshot]
[grunt]
1569
01:14:41,310 --> 01:14:42,812
[lawnmower]
1570
01:14:45,773 --> 01:14:46,773
[moist bite]
1571
01:14:48,776 --> 01:14:49,443
[Benny] Shoot to maim.
1572
01:14:49,694 --> 01:14:50,945
Bring him to me.
1573
01:14:53,906 --> 01:14:55,491
[rustling footsteps]
1574
01:15:08,462 --> 01:15:09,462
[gunshot]
1575
01:15:12,717 --> 01:15:14,427
[Brendan moaning]
1576
01:15:15,386 --> 01:15:16,887
[radio chatter]
1577
01:15:17,096 --> 01:15:19,265
The tango is down.
1578
01:15:19,473 --> 01:15:21,434
Benny tagged him in one shot.
1579
01:15:21,642 --> 01:15:23,894
Operation is a success.
1580
01:15:32,319 --> 01:15:34,196
[Benny] It's Miller time, ladies.
1581
01:15:34,405 --> 01:15:36,073
You boys owe yourself a beer.
1582
01:15:36,282 --> 01:15:38,563
[Promised Man] I don't know
what's going to happen to you.
1583
01:15:38,743 --> 01:15:40,536
But it's not gonna be pretty.
1584
01:15:41,037 --> 01:15:43,397
[Promised Man] What do you think
Benny's gonna do with him?
1585
01:15:45,124 --> 01:15:47,877
[Benny] We got a problem, Bean.
1586
01:15:48,085 --> 01:15:49,295
Big problem.
1587
01:15:49,503 --> 01:15:52,590
The creature was incubated
and brooded on my watch,
1588
01:15:52,798 --> 01:15:54,216
Benny... Bad.
1589
01:15:54,425 --> 01:15:56,385
The fruit of my labor and of my loins.
1590
01:15:56,594 --> 01:15:57,094
[Hoagie] Bad!
1591
01:15:57,303 --> 01:15:59,180
But he went and hatched in your lap.
1592
01:15:59,388 --> 01:16:04,226
This life form thinks you're his friend
and mayhaps the paterfamilias.
1593
01:16:04,435 --> 01:16:05,435
[Hoagie] Brendan...
1594
01:16:05,603 --> 01:16:08,147
I will not allow this...
1595
01:16:09,065 --> 01:16:10,107
violation.
1596
01:16:10,316 --> 01:16:12,526
He has imprinted with you,
1597
01:16:12,735 --> 01:16:14,779
and now you must surrender him.
1598
01:16:14,987 --> 01:16:17,698
Body and spirit.
1599
01:16:17,907 --> 01:16:19,700
You're a vampire, Benny.
1600
01:16:19,909 --> 01:16:21,452
You prey on weak people's blood.
1601
01:16:21,660 --> 01:16:23,303
You're talking to the man
who wrestled down the devil...
1602
01:16:23,373 --> 01:16:24,820
...and fucked him in the ass.
1603
01:16:24,955 --> 01:16:26,832
Let me make this shit-simple.
1604
01:16:27,041 --> 01:16:30,044
My man Spragg is going to go
to work on that homunculus.
1605
01:16:30,252 --> 01:16:33,339
Undo the damage that you have caused.
1606
01:16:33,547 --> 01:16:37,134
And then my ever loyal servant Lucas
is going to allow you to marinate
1607
01:16:37,343 --> 01:16:40,638
all night long
in one of his creations...
1608
01:16:40,846 --> 01:16:41,889
The Shit Box.
1609
01:16:42,473 --> 01:16:44,225
[Lucas] Here we have box.
1610
01:16:44,433 --> 01:16:45,810
Strong, made of metal.
1611
01:16:46,018 --> 01:16:48,187
Also, we have shit saved up.
1612
01:16:48,395 --> 01:16:50,106
This my design here simple.
1613
01:16:50,314 --> 01:16:51,816
Shit go in.
1614
01:16:52,191 --> 01:16:53,191
You go in.
1615
01:16:53,275 --> 01:16:53,859
Not the box.
1616
01:16:54,068 --> 01:16:55,152
Then we wait.
1617
01:16:55,361 --> 01:16:56,737
Maybe long time we wait.
1618
01:16:56,946 --> 01:16:59,198
This is like, experiment.
1619
01:16:59,406 --> 01:17:02,660
You go in box, then we see what happens.
1620
01:17:02,868 --> 01:17:03,869
What's going to happen?
1621
01:17:04,078 --> 01:17:06,122
These turds smell like shit!
1622
01:17:06,330 --> 01:17:08,332
Use this elixir with caution soldier.
1623
01:17:08,541 --> 01:17:09,583
Lucas' blend.
1624
01:17:09,792 --> 01:17:13,462
A consecrated and divine potion,
anathema to homunculi.
1625
01:17:13,671 --> 01:17:15,464
[Promised Man]
Huh, it's that magic juice.
1626
01:17:15,673 --> 01:17:17,216
- [Brendan] Hoagie!
- [Hoagie] Brendan!
1627
01:17:17,424 --> 01:17:17,800
Hoagie!
1628
01:17:18,008 --> 01:17:19,260
[Hoagie] Brendan! Help me!
1629
01:17:19,468 --> 01:17:22,596
Whenever your wife and kids
get home from wherever the fuck,
1630
01:17:22,847 --> 01:17:24,765
I will haul you out of that shit box,
1631
01:17:24,974 --> 01:17:26,225
and allow you to observe,
1632
01:17:26,433 --> 01:17:30,271
as I put a round in each
and every one of their cerebellums.
1633
01:17:30,479 --> 01:17:32,982
Extinguishing their trivial lives.
1634
01:17:33,190 --> 01:17:35,520
And only then will I do you
the courtesy...
1635
01:17:35,590 --> 01:17:38,863
...of sending you
into the bosom of Abraham.
1636
01:17:40,531 --> 01:17:42,992
[Hoagie grunting]
1637
01:17:43,200 --> 01:17:44,520
[Spragg] Shut up you little turd!
1638
01:17:44,702 --> 01:17:47,079
[Hoagie grunts]
1639
01:17:48,330 --> 01:17:49,762
[Promised Man] I hope you like shit.
1640
01:17:49,832 --> 01:17:51,667
Time for a shitty dip.
1641
01:17:57,464 --> 01:17:59,133
[Promised Man] That smells awful.
1642
01:17:59,341 --> 01:18:00,467
[Brendan moaning]
1643
01:18:01,760 --> 01:18:03,387
[Brendan] Ahhhh!
1644
01:18:03,596 --> 01:18:04,596
Unggh!
1645
01:18:07,016 --> 01:18:10,019
[Brendan moans in disgust and fear]
1646
01:18:11,020 --> 01:18:12,020
[Brendan whimpering]
1647
01:18:12,521 --> 01:18:17,484
[foreboding and mysterious music]
1648
01:19:13,749 --> 01:19:18,796
[Benny] You got your casein protein,
your whey protein, my collagen protein.
1649
01:19:19,004 --> 01:19:20,297
Stacked and jacked.
1650
01:19:21,757 --> 01:19:25,386
[promised men chattering]
1651
01:19:26,845 --> 01:19:27,638
[foil bubbling]
1652
01:19:27,846 --> 01:19:30,307
You stay away from that linseed oil.
1653
01:19:32,351 --> 01:19:33,352
[mysterious music]
1654
01:19:33,936 --> 01:19:35,646
[Blast-Face moans and grunts]
1655
01:19:38,774 --> 01:19:40,985
[podcast chatter]
1656
01:19:44,154 --> 01:19:47,157
[commercial] Mmm, wanna fuck a duck?
1657
01:19:47,908 --> 01:19:50,244
How about now?
1658
01:19:53,831 --> 01:19:55,249
[birdsong]
1659
01:19:56,417 --> 01:19:58,600
[radio] Hi, uh, Commander Piazza...
1660
01:19:58,770 --> 01:20:01,547
...says that chow is ready
at the command center.
1661
01:20:01,755 --> 01:20:04,591
Umm, we got flapjacks
and breakfast burritos.
1662
01:20:05,175 --> 01:20:08,929
[interrogative music]
1663
01:20:10,264 --> 01:20:12,766
[Lucas] Did not lock it the shit box.
1664
01:20:12,975 --> 01:20:14,226
Brendan!
1665
01:20:15,602 --> 01:20:17,146
Why do you hide from me?
1666
01:20:17,354 --> 01:20:17,896
You know me!
1667
01:20:18,105 --> 01:20:20,065
That's right Lucas, you fucking prick,
1668
01:20:20,274 --> 01:20:21,984
You forgot to lock the shit box.
1669
01:20:22,192 --> 01:20:24,987
You know who I am! I'm inside you!
1670
01:20:25,195 --> 01:20:25,779
[squelch]
1671
01:20:26,030 --> 01:20:28,532
It's like I'm controlling
inside of your mind right now.
1672
01:20:28,741 --> 01:20:30,326
Brendan Bean.
1673
01:20:30,534 --> 01:20:32,911
This is you, this is me too!
1674
01:20:33,120 --> 01:20:34,872
I'm Brendan Bean.
1675
01:20:35,080 --> 01:20:38,083
I would want go back into shit box.
1676
01:20:39,418 --> 01:20:41,337
You see, I don't have a weapon.
1677
01:20:41,545 --> 01:20:44,548
I don't want to hurt my friend.
1678
01:20:45,841 --> 01:20:48,177
You play this game good.
1679
01:20:48,385 --> 01:20:50,095
When you play the game,
1680
01:20:50,304 --> 01:20:52,681
you have your two choices
1681
01:20:52,890 --> 01:20:54,350
to win
1682
01:20:54,558 --> 01:20:56,435
or to lose.
1683
01:20:56,643 --> 01:20:59,188
Why would you choose to lose?
1684
01:20:59,396 --> 01:21:01,982
You lose this game you play Brendan.
1685
01:21:04,485 --> 01:21:05,944
My name is Brendan Bean.
1686
01:21:06,153 --> 01:21:06,987
[Lucas] Brendan Bean?
1687
01:21:07,196 --> 01:21:08,530
And I'm a winner!
1688
01:21:08,739 --> 01:21:09,448
[heavy thud]
1689
01:21:09,782 --> 01:21:11,241
[grunting]
1690
01:21:11,700 --> 01:21:13,994
[bluesy guitar music]
1691
01:21:14,203 --> 01:21:15,203
[shattering]
1692
01:21:15,954 --> 01:21:16,954
[smack]
[grunts of pain]
1693
01:21:19,875 --> 01:21:20,875
[dirt scattering]
1694
01:21:21,752 --> 01:21:22,752
[smashing]
1695
01:21:24,296 --> 01:21:25,339
[snapping wood and debris]
1696
01:21:29,259 --> 01:21:30,259
[heavy thud]
1697
01:21:34,098 --> 01:21:35,265
[flesh chop]
[Lucas screams]
1698
01:21:37,267 --> 01:21:38,267
[shattering glass]
1699
01:21:39,186 --> 01:21:41,188
[shuffling bodies]
[grunting]
1700
01:21:41,855 --> 01:21:42,856
[lawnmower starts]
1701
01:21:44,024 --> 01:21:45,150
[Hoagie moaning]
1702
01:21:45,359 --> 01:21:48,153
Don't you look at me like that
you little freak.
1703
01:21:48,362 --> 01:21:51,073
I don't like this any more than you do.
1704
01:21:51,281 --> 01:21:52,711
I should be at the Indian casino...
1705
01:21:52,781 --> 01:21:54,993
...checking out Chris Angel
with my old lady.
1706
01:21:55,202 --> 01:21:56,202
[squishy bite]
1707
01:21:56,370 --> 01:21:59,289
Instead I'm stuck here
wiping your nose you little mole!
1708
01:21:59,498 --> 01:22:00,874
- No!
- Shut up!
1709
01:22:01,083 --> 01:22:02,126
[heavy thud]
1710
01:22:02,543 --> 01:22:05,129
Fuck you!
1711
01:22:05,337 --> 01:22:06,630
[Spragg] Fuck me?
1712
01:22:06,839 --> 01:22:08,340
Fuck you.
1713
01:22:09,883 --> 01:22:10,883
[bottle shattering]
1714
01:22:15,305 --> 01:22:16,305
[bottle shattering]
1715
01:22:19,560 --> 01:22:20,602
[shuffling wood]
1716
01:22:22,146 --> 01:22:23,480
[fleshy stab]
[grunting]
1717
01:22:23,689 --> 01:22:24,689
[sucking wound]
1718
01:22:28,652 --> 01:22:29,652
[bottle shattering]
1719
01:22:32,406 --> 01:22:33,486
[wood clattering to ground]
1720
01:22:33,574 --> 01:22:37,244
You... eat egg...
1721
01:22:38,245 --> 01:22:40,247
For breakfast?
1722
01:22:40,664 --> 01:22:43,500
Egg, for breakfast?
1723
01:22:45,711 --> 01:22:47,880
Lucas.
1724
01:22:48,088 --> 01:22:51,091
You're a very bad man.
[hammer click]
1725
01:22:51,300 --> 01:22:54,136
But I didn't want to have to hurt you.
1726
01:22:54,344 --> 01:22:55,095
[tremendous boom]
1727
01:22:55,304 --> 01:22:56,902
[agonized moan]
[body sliding across ground]
1728
01:22:56,972 --> 01:22:57,723
[corpse plop]
1729
01:22:57,931 --> 01:23:00,142
[gentle patter of blood dripping]
1730
01:23:01,018 --> 01:23:01,727
[lawnmower turns off]
1731
01:23:01,935 --> 01:23:03,979
[instrumental music]
1732
01:23:04,855 --> 01:23:06,940
[Spragg] Benny, we got, uh...
1733
01:23:07,149 --> 01:23:08,609
We got gunfire out here.
1734
01:23:08,817 --> 01:23:10,666
[Benny] I'm sure some of the boys
are just fucking around.
1735
01:23:10,736 --> 01:23:12,488
You keep working on that little shit.
1736
01:23:12,696 --> 01:23:14,281
Kiss my ass!
1737
01:23:14,490 --> 01:23:15,490
[Spragg] Affirmative.
1738
01:23:15,574 --> 01:23:17,493
Well...
1739
01:23:18,285 --> 01:23:19,953
Here goes nuthin' shit bird.
1740
01:23:20,162 --> 01:23:24,458
[Hoagie moans in pain]
[flesh dissolving sizzle]
1741
01:23:24,666 --> 01:23:26,919
[Hoagie] Pain! Pain!
1742
01:23:27,127 --> 01:23:28,295
[water splashing]
1743
01:23:32,716 --> 01:23:35,260
[music picks up in intensity]
1744
01:23:41,558 --> 01:23:43,936
[Brendan] This looks like a nice gun.
1745
01:23:47,731 --> 01:23:50,067
[Promised Man] Heads up, soy boy.
1746
01:23:50,275 --> 01:23:51,652
You're fixing to use that puppy?
1747
01:23:51,860 --> 01:23:53,570
Have to flip the safety.
1748
01:23:53,779 --> 01:23:56,198
Little doohickey on the side.
1749
01:23:56,406 --> 01:23:57,406
[click]
1750
01:23:57,616 --> 01:23:58,630
- Oh shit!
- Ahhhhh!
1751
01:23:58,700 --> 01:23:59,743
[gunfire]
[flesh ripping]
1752
01:24:00,369 --> 01:24:01,578
[gunfire]
1753
01:24:02,246 --> 01:24:03,246
Argh!
1754
01:24:03,622 --> 01:24:04,706
[Promised Man moaning]
1755
01:24:06,208 --> 01:24:07,208
[radio] Gunfire reported.
1756
01:24:07,292 --> 01:24:09,253
Hostile is on the loose.
1757
01:24:12,256 --> 01:24:12,756
[gunfire]
1758
01:24:12,965 --> 01:24:13,965
It's Brendan Bean!
1759
01:24:14,132 --> 01:24:15,175
[gunfire]
[debris]
1760
01:24:16,760 --> 01:24:17,302
[gunfire]
1761
01:24:17,511 --> 01:24:18,095
[body plop]
1762
01:24:18,303 --> 01:24:19,680
[gunfire]
[debris]
1763
01:24:19,888 --> 01:24:20,973
[scream]
[corpse slam]
1764
01:24:21,682 --> 01:24:23,225
[Brendan] Die, motherfucker!
1765
01:24:23,433 --> 01:24:24,768
[gunfire]
[debris]
1766
01:24:25,602 --> 01:24:26,937
[gunfire]
[debris]
1767
01:24:28,605 --> 01:24:30,023
[gunfire]
[debris]
1768
01:24:30,232 --> 01:24:31,632
[grunts of death]
[plopping corpses]
1769
01:24:32,067 --> 01:24:33,749
[Brendan]
I'm actually killing these guys!
1770
01:24:33,819 --> 01:24:34,861
[Hoagie] Pain!
1771
01:24:35,070 --> 01:24:38,865
- [Spragg] Oh shit!
- I melted the little guy!
1772
01:24:39,074 --> 01:24:42,035
[radio] The fire team is down!
1773
01:24:42,244 --> 01:24:44,134
- [radio] Reporting several casualties.
- [melty squelches]
1774
01:24:44,204 --> 01:24:44,788
We need backup!
1775
01:24:44,997 --> 01:24:47,165
This dude's a fuckin' killing machine!
[gunfire]
1776
01:24:47,374 --> 01:24:49,167
Benny, do you hear me!?
[gunfire]
1777
01:24:49,751 --> 01:24:50,586
Benny!
[gunshot]
1778
01:24:50,794 --> 01:24:51,336
[death-grunt]
1779
01:24:51,545 --> 01:24:52,963
Benny, where are you!?
1780
01:24:53,171 --> 01:24:54,923
[gunshot]
Show yourself!
1781
01:24:55,132 --> 01:24:56,883
Benny, this is my house!
1782
01:24:57,092 --> 01:24:59,052
And the house always wins!
1783
01:24:59,261 --> 01:25:01,179
What the hell is going on out there?
1784
01:25:01,388 --> 01:25:03,148
[Bogardus]
Benny, it's a fucking bloodbath!
1785
01:25:03,265 --> 01:25:04,266
Gimme a SITREP!
1786
01:25:04,474 --> 01:25:05,559
He's a total badass.
1787
01:25:05,767 --> 01:25:06,935
Guy is a ghost.
1788
01:25:07,144 --> 01:25:07,603
Bogardus!?
1789
01:25:07,811 --> 01:25:09,896
Ex-special forces or something.
1790
01:25:10,105 --> 01:25:11,105
Bogardus!?
1791
01:25:11,732 --> 01:25:14,026
This guy must have a doctorate
in shredding ass.
1792
01:25:14,234 --> 01:25:15,332
[Promised Man] Ready to rock!
1793
01:25:15,402 --> 01:25:17,571
[Benny muttering]
1794
01:25:17,779 --> 01:25:19,253
Get out there and check the perimeter!
1795
01:25:19,323 --> 01:25:19,990
You got it Benny!
1796
01:25:20,198 --> 01:25:22,618
Anybody sees Bogardus
you let me know ASAP!
1797
01:25:22,826 --> 01:25:24,119
I need a SITREP!
1798
01:25:24,661 --> 01:25:26,538
Benny's gonna barbecue my ass!
[squelch]
1799
01:25:26,747 --> 01:25:28,248
Benny Piazza!
1800
01:25:28,457 --> 01:25:29,833
You trying to hide!?
1801
01:25:30,500 --> 01:25:30,834
Shit.
1802
01:25:31,043 --> 01:25:32,294
[Brendan] Ah shut up!
1803
01:25:32,502 --> 01:25:35,505
Ahhhhhh! Ahhhhhh!
[gunfire]
1804
01:25:35,714 --> 01:25:36,923
[shell casings tinkling]
1805
01:25:37,132 --> 01:25:38,467
[wet thud]
1806
01:25:38,884 --> 01:25:39,884
Ahhhhhh!
1807
01:25:40,552 --> 01:25:41,219
- [Promised Man] I got him!
- [Brendan] Benny!?
1808
01:25:41,428 --> 01:25:42,429
[gunfire]
Yahh!
1809
01:25:43,430 --> 01:25:44,640
[Brendan] Yes! More guns!
1810
01:25:44,848 --> 01:25:46,183
[music gets more badass]
1811
01:25:46,391 --> 01:25:47,517
It's Bean!
1812
01:25:49,019 --> 01:25:49,811
Go, go, go!
1813
01:25:50,020 --> 01:25:51,897
[Promised Man moaning in pain]
1814
01:25:52,230 --> 01:25:53,231
Hi! How you doin?
1815
01:25:53,440 --> 01:25:54,274
[gunfire]
1816
01:25:54,483 --> 01:25:56,276
Psycho sack of maggot bag of puke!
1817
01:25:56,485 --> 01:25:57,833
[gunfire]
[meaty chunks splattering]
1818
01:25:57,903 --> 01:25:58,737
[gun clicks]
1819
01:25:58,945 --> 01:25:59,946
Uh!
1820
01:26:01,281 --> 01:26:02,366
Light him up!
[gunfire]
1821
01:26:03,533 --> 01:26:06,703
[gunfire]
1822
01:26:08,538 --> 01:26:11,124
[gunfire]
[debris]
1823
01:26:11,375 --> 01:26:14,002
[epic guitar music]
1824
01:26:14,628 --> 01:26:16,213
[Promised Man] We got him pinned down!
1825
01:26:16,421 --> 01:26:17,519
[Sheriff] Here, Beanie Beanie!
1826
01:26:17,589 --> 01:26:19,800
[gunfire]
[debris]
1827
01:26:20,008 --> 01:26:21,760
[Promised Man] Sheriff guy's got him.
1828
01:26:22,761 --> 01:26:24,221
[Sheriff] Come on out.
1829
01:26:24,638 --> 01:26:25,806
Ahhhh!
[meaty bite]
1830
01:26:26,056 --> 01:26:27,056
[revolver fires]
1831
01:26:27,766 --> 01:26:28,809
[Grunting]
1832
01:26:29,017 --> 01:26:30,435
[gunfire]
1833
01:26:30,644 --> 01:26:31,436
[Promised Man] Shit!
1834
01:26:31,645 --> 01:26:36,483
[gunfire]
[meaty explosions]
1835
01:26:38,652 --> 01:26:39,986
[Promised Man] Re-loading!
1836
01:26:40,195 --> 01:26:41,488
Suck on this!
1837
01:26:41,697 --> 01:26:43,573
[pistol shot]
[brains and chunks expel]
1838
01:26:44,533 --> 01:26:46,076
[shotgun blast]
[debris]
1839
01:26:47,160 --> 01:26:48,578
[pistol shot]
1840
01:26:49,204 --> 01:26:50,288
[Brendan] Die!
1841
01:26:51,581 --> 01:26:52,749
Haha! Gotcha!
1842
01:26:52,958 --> 01:26:57,963
[radio] We have lost sight of the target
and are proceeding with extreme caution.
1843
01:26:58,171 --> 01:26:59,171
Over.
1844
01:27:00,424 --> 01:27:02,592
[distant gunfire]
1845
01:27:02,801 --> 01:27:06,805
Benny, we just assumed he was harmless.
1846
01:27:07,431 --> 01:27:11,393
Assumption is mother and midwife
to all fuck ups, hermano.
1847
01:27:11,935 --> 01:27:14,187
[Promised Man] No. Please.
1848
01:27:14,438 --> 01:27:16,648
[Benny] Now, go to sleep.
1849
01:27:16,857 --> 01:27:18,233
[neck snapping]
[grunt]
1850
01:27:18,483 --> 01:27:21,363
[mysterious and mischievous music]
[Bastard Homunculi chortle and giggle]
1851
01:27:21,486 --> 01:27:24,406
[Blast-Face] Hey Benny,
what happened to your Promised Men!?
1852
01:27:24,614 --> 01:27:26,380
- He's all alone!
- [Trickster] They're all dead!
1853
01:27:26,450 --> 01:27:27,547
[Female Hoagie]
All of your buddies are dead!
1854
01:27:27,617 --> 01:27:28,994
[Bastard Homunculi laugh and jeer]
1855
01:27:29,202 --> 01:27:30,370
You little monsters.
1856
01:27:30,579 --> 01:27:32,748
I curse the day I created you.
1857
01:27:32,956 --> 01:27:34,666
Gaaaahhhh!
[gunfire]
1858
01:27:34,875 --> 01:27:37,794
[gunfire]
[exploding homunculi]
1859
01:27:38,003 --> 01:27:39,629
Gahhhh!
1860
01:27:47,763 --> 01:27:50,140
[radio chatter]
1861
01:27:52,684 --> 01:27:54,044
[shotgun blast]
[Promised Man] Gah!
1862
01:27:54,227 --> 01:27:55,228
[body plop]
Ahhh!
1863
01:27:55,437 --> 01:27:57,105
[gunfire]
[debris]
1864
01:27:57,314 --> 01:27:58,453
[Promised Man] He took my leg!
1865
01:27:58,523 --> 01:27:59,608
[gunfire]
[debris]
1866
01:27:59,816 --> 01:28:00,400
[shotgun racks]
1867
01:28:00,609 --> 01:28:01,359
He took my leg!
1868
01:28:01,568 --> 01:28:02,666
[shotgun blast]
[genital shredding squelch]
1869
01:28:02,736 --> 01:28:03,736
[gunfire]
[body thud]
1870
01:28:03,862 --> 01:28:05,001
[Brendan] Good night, shithead!
1871
01:28:05,071 --> 01:28:07,282
My nards! My jewels!
[shotgun racks]
1872
01:28:07,699 --> 01:28:08,755
[Promised Man] No, no, no, no, no...
1873
01:28:08,825 --> 01:28:10,025
[shotgun blast]
[squishy splat]
1874
01:28:10,410 --> 01:28:11,925
[Brendan] Bye bye bubble-butt!
[shotgun racks]
1875
01:28:11,995 --> 01:28:14,395
[Promised Man] Hey asshole!
Gimme an ambulance you sick fuck!
1876
01:28:14,581 --> 01:28:15,749
Dirty prick!
1877
01:28:16,374 --> 01:28:17,734
[shotgun blast]
[explosive squelch]
1878
01:28:18,502 --> 01:28:20,462
[gurgling skull]
[Brendan] Say please, asshole!
1879
01:28:22,672 --> 01:28:24,632
- [Brendan] Cuckoo!
- [Promised Man] Oh god, Jeez!
1880
01:28:24,758 --> 01:28:25,838
[shotgun blast]
[heavy thud]
1881
01:28:26,009 --> 01:28:27,511
[Brendan] Sorry!
1882
01:28:27,719 --> 01:28:28,970
[radio] Target acquired.
1883
01:28:29,262 --> 01:28:30,430
[gunfire]
[shattering glass]
1884
01:28:30,639 --> 01:28:33,600
[gunfire]
[metal impacts and ricochets]
1885
01:28:33,934 --> 01:28:35,602
[Benny] Spragg, this is Benny!
1886
01:28:35,811 --> 01:28:37,270
Spragg, where the hell are you!?
1887
01:28:37,479 --> 01:28:40,148
I need you out here soldier.
I need every swingin' dick we got!
1888
01:28:40,357 --> 01:28:42,609
[fleshy constriction]
[heavy squelching]
1889
01:28:42,818 --> 01:28:44,736
[orifice squishing]
[Spragg moaning]
1890
01:28:44,945 --> 01:28:47,405
[flesh-dissolving sizzle]
[sustained squelching]
1891
01:28:47,614 --> 01:28:49,157
[flesh crunching]
[splattering liquid]
1892
01:28:49,366 --> 01:28:49,991
Ahhhhhhhh!
1893
01:28:50,200 --> 01:28:50,992
[bubbling]
[steaming]
1894
01:28:51,201 --> 01:28:52,369
[thud]
1895
01:28:52,869 --> 01:28:54,162
[gunfire]
1896
01:28:54,371 --> 01:28:57,123
[eerie music with Gregorian chanting]
1897
01:28:57,332 --> 01:29:00,919
[ripping flesh]
[demonic growls]
1898
01:29:02,212 --> 01:29:03,338
[demonic moans]
1899
01:29:04,089 --> 01:29:04,756
[whooshing]
1900
01:29:04,965 --> 01:29:06,508
[instrumental music intensifies]
1901
01:29:07,634 --> 01:29:08,634
[demonic growl]
1902
01:29:08,760 --> 01:29:09,803
[radio chatter]
1903
01:29:10,011 --> 01:29:11,179
Gahhh!
1904
01:29:13,014 --> 01:29:14,808
[Demonic growling]
[stabbing]
1905
01:29:15,016 --> 01:29:16,059
[gut-ripping squelch]
1906
01:29:17,394 --> 01:29:18,228
[gut-ripping squelch]
1907
01:29:18,436 --> 01:29:19,437
[dying wheeze]
1908
01:29:19,646 --> 01:29:21,481
[demonic huffing]
1909
01:29:25,694 --> 01:29:26,694
[demonic growling]
1910
01:29:26,778 --> 01:29:27,946
[gunshot]
1911
01:29:28,154 --> 01:29:30,905
I'm offering two steak dinners
to any swinging dick...
1912
01:29:30,975 --> 01:29:32,826
...that can deep six that asshole!
1913
01:29:33,034 --> 01:29:35,078
- Go!
- [Bogardus] Let's get him you guys!
1914
01:29:35,287 --> 01:29:38,290
I'm gonna give your head
to Salome mortherfucker.
1915
01:29:41,167 --> 01:29:42,794
[Benny] Tarkowski and Jones,
1916
01:29:43,003 --> 01:29:44,212
You two sweep the house.
1917
01:29:44,421 --> 01:29:45,255
Locate Bean,
1918
01:29:45,463 --> 01:29:48,174
and exterminate that motherfucker!
1919
01:29:50,468 --> 01:29:51,468
Who's got eyes on me!?
1920
01:29:51,595 --> 01:29:53,889
Who's got eyes on me? Anybody?
1921
01:29:58,768 --> 01:30:02,230
Can somebody get me a goddamn SITREP?
1922
01:30:02,439 --> 01:30:04,232
What the fuck is going on?
1923
01:30:07,694 --> 01:30:09,112
[instrumental music]
1924
01:30:20,040 --> 01:30:22,250
Hey Benny, this is Tarkowski.
1925
01:30:22,459 --> 01:30:23,668
I'm checkin' out the basement.
1926
01:30:24,544 --> 01:30:25,295
Check.
1927
01:30:25,503 --> 01:30:27,631
Keep your head on a swivel
and mind your six.
1928
01:30:27,839 --> 01:30:29,716
SITREP when cleared.
1929
01:30:32,469 --> 01:30:34,387
[Demon Brendan] Tarkowski...
1930
01:30:34,638 --> 01:30:36,264
You're mine.
1931
01:30:36,514 --> 01:30:37,766
[gunfire]
1932
01:30:37,974 --> 01:30:39,476
Tarkowskiiiii...
1933
01:30:43,271 --> 01:30:45,690
Tarkowski, I'm over here.
1934
01:30:48,902 --> 01:30:50,102
[meaty stab]
[Tarkowski grunts]
1935
01:30:50,654 --> 01:30:52,155
[stabbing]
1936
01:30:55,158 --> 01:30:56,993
[demonic grunting]
1937
01:30:58,662 --> 01:31:00,330
[demonic grunts]
[gurgling blood]
1938
01:31:00,538 --> 01:31:03,333
[Tarkowski screaming]
1939
01:31:03,541 --> 01:31:06,544
[Demon Brendan] Nice face...
1940
01:31:07,045 --> 01:31:08,213
[blade clatters to floor]
1941
01:31:09,089 --> 01:31:10,548
[flesh stretching]
1942
01:31:11,466 --> 01:31:12,300
[face peeling flesh-squelch]
1943
01:31:12,509 --> 01:31:14,052
I'll take it.
1944
01:31:16,221 --> 01:31:18,431
Somebody check on Tarkowski, dammit!
1945
01:31:19,641 --> 01:31:21,393
[music intensifies]
1946
01:31:23,061 --> 01:31:24,980
[demonic muttering]
1947
01:31:30,068 --> 01:31:31,444
[footsteps]
1948
01:31:37,117 --> 01:31:37,450
Tarkowski...
1949
01:31:37,701 --> 01:31:39,494
[Tarkowski gargling]
1950
01:31:39,953 --> 01:31:41,204
He took his fuckin' face.
1951
01:31:41,413 --> 01:31:42,956
[chainsaw roaring]
1952
01:31:43,164 --> 01:31:45,125
[scrotum pulping squelching]
[screaming]
1953
01:31:45,333 --> 01:31:48,545
[chainsaw whirring]
[blood and meat splattering]
1954
01:31:51,715 --> 01:31:53,133
[chainsaw buzzing]
[thud]
1955
01:31:57,512 --> 01:31:59,097
[muted chainsaw buzzing]
1956
01:32:05,311 --> 01:32:07,313
[Demon Brendan] Pretty face...
1957
01:32:10,233 --> 01:32:11,276
[squishing]
1958
01:32:15,155 --> 01:32:16,406
[squishing]
1959
01:32:25,081 --> 01:32:26,541
[demonic grunting]
1960
01:32:29,210 --> 01:32:31,546
[radio chatter]
1961
01:32:33,006 --> 01:32:34,215
[sizzling]
1962
01:32:40,930 --> 01:32:42,223
[glass smashing]
[grunt]
1963
01:32:43,975 --> 01:32:45,310
[bone crunching snap]
1964
01:32:47,103 --> 01:32:48,271
[stab]
[grunt]
1965
01:32:54,277 --> 01:32:56,654
[Brendan]
I love you beautiful kids so much.
1966
01:32:56,863 --> 01:32:58,990
You're everything to me.
1967
01:33:03,995 --> 01:33:05,205
[thundering whoosh]
1968
01:33:11,753 --> 01:33:13,922
[Benny] Uh, can I get an update?
1969
01:33:14,130 --> 01:33:16,674
Can I get an update? Over.
1970
01:33:17,217 --> 01:33:19,344
[growing pressure]
[fleshy pumping]
1971
01:33:20,720 --> 01:33:21,930
[moist bubbling]
1972
01:33:23,848 --> 01:33:24,682
[powerful explosion]
1973
01:33:24,891 --> 01:33:26,976
[intense instrumental synth music]
1974
01:33:27,185 --> 01:33:28,228
[steam hisses]
1975
01:33:30,647 --> 01:33:32,649
[fleshy breaching]
[monstrous moaning]
1976
01:33:32,857 --> 01:33:35,026
[squishes and squelches]
1977
01:33:35,318 --> 01:33:37,737
[wet slapping]
1978
01:33:39,781 --> 01:33:41,991
[steam hiss]
[squishes]
1979
01:33:42,200 --> 01:33:47,747
[Mega-Hoagie grunting]
1980
01:33:50,041 --> 01:33:53,002
[fleshy rips]
1981
01:33:59,217 --> 01:34:00,802
[footsteps]
1982
01:34:03,346 --> 01:34:04,639
[ejecting clip]
1983
01:34:07,267 --> 01:34:08,476
[reloading]
1984
01:34:08,685 --> 01:34:10,353
[wood splintering]
1985
01:34:11,187 --> 01:34:12,230
[Mega-Hoagie moaning]
1986
01:34:13,064 --> 01:34:14,691
Hoagie has metamorphosed.
1987
01:34:15,692 --> 01:34:16,693
[Mega-Hoagie growls]
1988
01:34:16,901 --> 01:34:18,278
Wow!
1989
01:34:18,820 --> 01:34:21,114
He's huge.
1990
01:34:21,322 --> 01:34:22,991
Get a hold of that beast!
1991
01:34:23,199 --> 01:34:25,493
Oh Lord, what have I wrought?
1992
01:34:26,327 --> 01:34:27,036
[Bogardus] Come on guys!
1993
01:34:27,245 --> 01:34:27,996
Let's defend ourselves!
1994
01:34:28,204 --> 01:34:30,498
Eat it, you bitch!
1995
01:34:31,166 --> 01:34:32,347
[Brendan] Yeah, that's it Hoagie!
1996
01:34:32,417 --> 01:34:33,877
Rip 'em a new one!
1997
01:34:34,085 --> 01:34:35,128
[Brendan laughing]
1998
01:34:35,879 --> 01:34:37,547
[Benny] Don't all stand in the circle.
1999
01:34:37,755 --> 01:34:39,007
Attack him all at once!
2000
01:34:39,424 --> 01:34:40,091
[thud]
2001
01:34:40,300 --> 01:34:41,342
[Bogardus yells in fear]
2002
01:34:43,178 --> 01:34:44,178
[skull-bashing squelch]
2003
01:34:44,637 --> 01:34:45,637
Bogardus!
2004
01:34:45,805 --> 01:34:46,805
[thud]
2005
01:34:46,931 --> 01:34:48,725
I got $100 gift card to Claim Jumpers
2006
01:34:48,933 --> 01:34:51,269
to whoever captures that beast!
2007
01:34:51,519 --> 01:34:52,519
[thud]
2008
01:34:54,105 --> 01:34:55,203
[thwack]
[Promised Man yelps]
2009
01:34:55,273 --> 01:34:55,857
[Brendan] Yeah, yeah!
2010
01:34:56,065 --> 01:34:58,568
There you go Hoagie,
rip 'em a new asshole!
2011
01:34:58,776 --> 01:34:59,444
[Promised Man screams in fear]
2012
01:34:59,652 --> 01:35:01,209
[Brendan]
Yeah! Give him the ole one-two!
2013
01:35:01,279 --> 01:35:02,279
Yeah, get him!
2014
01:35:02,405 --> 01:35:03,406
[head crushing squish]
2015
01:35:04,365 --> 01:35:05,617
[Mega-Hoagie muttering]
2016
01:35:07,076 --> 01:35:08,369
I wanted to spare your life.
2017
01:35:08,578 --> 01:35:10,079
You were my creation.
2018
01:35:10,288 --> 01:35:11,581
But I see you now, Hoagie.
2019
01:35:11,789 --> 01:35:13,555
[Brendan]
Watch out Hoagie, he's got a knife.
2020
01:35:13,625 --> 01:35:15,210
No, he's my friend!
2021
01:35:15,418 --> 01:35:16,628
[Mega-Hoagie grunting in pain]
2022
01:35:16,920 --> 01:35:17,921
[juicy stab]
2023
01:35:18,838 --> 01:35:20,548
Noooo!
2024
01:35:23,801 --> 01:35:26,012
[dramatic music]
2025
01:35:26,930 --> 01:35:28,556
[Brendan] No, stop! Benny!
2026
01:35:28,765 --> 01:35:30,683
You're hurting him! You're hurting him!
2027
01:35:30,934 --> 01:35:33,228
Can't you see that he's hurt!?
2028
01:35:37,315 --> 01:35:43,821
♪ Hoagie ♪
2029
01:35:44,447 --> 01:35:48,868
♪ Hoagie ♪
2030
01:35:49,494 --> 01:35:52,080
♪ Hoagie ♪
2031
01:35:54,249 --> 01:35:57,752
♪ Hoagie ♪
2032
01:35:58,962 --> 01:36:00,964
[Brendan] Hoagie...
2033
01:36:01,172 --> 01:36:03,967
You're my very best friend.
2034
01:36:04,175 --> 01:36:06,135
And friends never say goodbye.
2035
01:36:07,262 --> 01:36:10,390
♪ Hoagie ♪
2036
01:36:11,808 --> 01:36:14,644
♪ Hoagie ♪
2037
01:36:14,852 --> 01:36:16,396
[gunshot]
[brain splattering]
2038
01:36:21,943 --> 01:36:24,237
[running footsteps]
2039
01:36:24,445 --> 01:36:25,446
[gunshot]
[ricochet]
2040
01:36:27,240 --> 01:36:29,325
[gunshot]
[Benny] Take a bite out of me!?
2041
01:36:29,617 --> 01:36:33,037
[gunshot]
You wanna take a bite out of Benny!?
2042
01:36:34,289 --> 01:36:36,082
[gunshot]
Take a bite out of Benny!?
2043
01:36:38,459 --> 01:36:40,295
You wanna take a bite out of me?
2044
01:36:40,503 --> 01:36:41,811
You'll be licking your asshole
for a month...
2045
01:36:41,881 --> 01:36:43,478
...trying to get the taste
out of yer mouth.
2046
01:36:43,548 --> 01:36:44,549
Kiss my ass, Benny.
2047
01:36:44,757 --> 01:36:46,957
And I'll lay a lil dookie
in there for ya! [kick impact]
2048
01:36:47,176 --> 01:36:49,762
[Brendan roars]
[body crashing]
2049
01:36:53,266 --> 01:36:54,434
[blade unsheathing]
2050
01:36:55,184 --> 01:36:55,935
[blade unsheathing]
2051
01:36:56,144 --> 01:36:58,896
I'm gonna drop you like a hot turd.
2052
01:36:59,105 --> 01:37:01,482
[blades striking]
[whooshing of knives]
2053
01:37:01,691 --> 01:37:03,234
[instrumental music]
2054
01:37:03,443 --> 01:37:05,778
[grunting]
[clang of metal]
2055
01:37:06,362 --> 01:37:07,530
[slicing flesh]
2056
01:37:07,905 --> 01:37:11,701
[blades striking]
[whooshing of knives]
2057
01:37:15,371 --> 01:37:18,166
[grunting]
[smashing and clattering]
2058
01:37:20,501 --> 01:37:22,337
[fleshy slice]
2059
01:37:24,297 --> 01:37:28,092
[struggling grunts]
2060
01:37:31,137 --> 01:37:35,558
[dull thuds]
[grunts of pain]
2061
01:37:36,517 --> 01:37:38,436
[blade whoosh]
[squishy slash]
2062
01:37:38,644 --> 01:37:40,063
[heavy thud]
[grunt of pain]
2063
01:37:40,772 --> 01:37:41,189
[struggling]
2064
01:37:41,397 --> 01:37:42,397
[heavy impact]
2065
01:37:43,941 --> 01:37:46,527
[struggling]
2066
01:37:49,197 --> 01:37:50,740
[slicing]
[Brendan grunts]
2067
01:37:51,741 --> 01:37:52,992
[struggling]
2068
01:37:53,201 --> 01:37:54,327
[slicing]
2069
01:37:54,535 --> 01:37:55,535
[thud]
2070
01:37:57,747 --> 01:38:01,501
[struggling]
2071
01:38:01,709 --> 01:38:03,836
[meaty stab]
[gushing blood]
2072
01:38:05,880 --> 01:38:07,715
[squish]
[Benny grunts in pain]
2073
01:38:09,300 --> 01:38:10,635
[moist pull]
2074
01:38:10,843 --> 01:38:12,303
[heavy wet impact]
[Benny grunts]
2075
01:38:12,762 --> 01:38:17,308
[Benny in agony]
[blood squirting]
2076
01:38:21,312 --> 01:38:22,772
[wet pull]
2077
01:38:23,481 --> 01:38:25,483
[dripping blood]
2078
01:38:33,241 --> 01:38:36,202
[Benny moaning]
2079
01:38:39,622 --> 01:38:41,082
[Benny grunting]
2080
01:38:43,960 --> 01:38:46,295
[heavy machinery whirring]
2081
01:38:47,672 --> 01:38:51,259
[Benny screams]
[bone crushing squelches]
2082
01:38:51,467 --> 01:38:52,969
[wood splitting]
2083
01:38:56,722 --> 01:38:59,058
[heavy machinery whirring]
2084
01:38:59,809 --> 01:39:03,229
[blood dripping]
[Benny moaning]
2085
01:39:08,234 --> 01:39:13,322
[Benny grunting]
2086
01:39:16,826 --> 01:39:19,620
I guess I cut off a plug of tobacco
2087
01:39:19,829 --> 01:39:22,832
bigger than I could chew.
2088
01:39:25,209 --> 01:39:27,420
You're pretty good, Bean...
2089
01:39:29,672 --> 01:39:31,257
I never knew
2090
01:39:31,466 --> 01:39:34,469
what a warrior you could be.
2091
01:39:41,934 --> 01:39:44,270
[dramatic music]
2092
01:39:44,979 --> 01:39:47,190
My son.
2093
01:39:47,398 --> 01:39:49,650
My boy.
2094
01:39:49,859 --> 01:39:52,028
I forgive you,
2095
01:39:52,236 --> 01:39:55,156
I forgive you your transgressions.
2096
01:39:56,115 --> 01:39:59,494
Come give your father a hug!
2097
01:40:01,370 --> 01:40:03,206
[flesh rending rip]
2098
01:40:05,750 --> 01:40:07,210
[blood dripping]
2099
01:40:17,178 --> 01:40:18,554
[thud]
2100
01:40:18,763 --> 01:40:21,766
♪ Into the water ♪
2101
01:40:23,226 --> 01:40:25,937
♪ I wade out and see ♪
2102
01:40:26,938 --> 01:40:32,235
♪ The reflection of a man
looking back at me ♪
2103
01:40:35,738 --> 01:40:38,741
♪ A man we knew ♪
2104
01:40:39,700 --> 01:40:42,703
♪ Who brought only grief ♪
2105
01:40:43,538 --> 01:40:48,251
♪ A liar, a cheater,
a heartbreaking lonesome thief ♪
2106
01:40:48,459 --> 01:40:49,919
[car horn honks]
2107
01:40:52,088 --> 01:40:55,091
♪ He wore my name ♪
2108
01:40:56,467 --> 01:40:59,720
♪ For I was he ♪
2109
01:40:59,929 --> 01:41:05,101
♪ But he vanished away
when I banished him out to sea ♪
2110
01:41:05,351 --> 01:41:07,645
[childen yammer]
2111
01:41:08,688 --> 01:41:11,315
♪ Every now and then ♪
2112
01:41:12,984 --> 01:41:16,195
♪ He comes back to shore ♪
2113
01:41:17,905 --> 01:41:23,953
♪ And I find myself trapped
with that man behind a locked door ♪
2114
01:41:24,620 --> 01:41:27,623
♪ In a cell called my soul ♪
2115
01:41:29,125 --> 01:41:31,961
♪ I found a way ♪
2116
01:41:33,212 --> 01:41:36,048
♪ To break free ♪
2117
01:41:36,966 --> 01:41:44,473
♪ To give up the ghost and be more
of the man you need me to be ♪
2118
01:41:45,474 --> 01:41:48,311
♪ I found a way ♪
2119
01:41:49,937 --> 01:41:52,773
♪ I found a way ♪
2120
01:41:53,482 --> 01:42:00,656
♪ To move from my past and grow
into the man that you see here today ♪
2121
01:42:02,408 --> 01:42:05,244
♪ I found a way ♪
2122
01:43:34,333 --> 01:43:39,255
[diegetic nu-metal]
2123
01:43:40,214 --> 01:43:44,343
[door squeaks]
2124
01:43:44,552 --> 01:43:49,932
[shoveling dirt]
2125
01:43:50,141 --> 01:43:53,644
[mysterious music]
2126
01:43:53,853 --> 01:43:56,230
[shoveling dirt]
2127
01:43:57,398 --> 01:44:00,609
[footsteps approach]
2128
01:44:14,832 --> 01:44:16,208
What is that thing?
2129
01:44:16,417 --> 01:44:18,085
That's a Hoagie.
2130
01:44:18,294 --> 01:44:20,463
It's kind of like an alien, maybe.
2131
01:44:20,671 --> 01:44:23,174
Or like a troll.
2132
01:44:23,382 --> 01:44:25,718
It could be dead, but it could be alive.
2133
01:44:25,926 --> 01:44:27,970
What does that thing do?
2134
01:44:28,179 --> 01:44:30,055
Well, it holds all kinds of, like,
2135
01:44:30,264 --> 01:44:33,225
arcane powers and stuff, like,
2136
01:44:33,476 --> 01:44:36,479
if you got, like, osteoporosis or,
2137
01:44:36,687 --> 01:44:42,026
like, problems with your boner,
or like, plantar fasciitis,
2138
01:44:42,234 --> 01:44:45,571
like, Hoagie can fix all of that,
I mean, easy.
2139
01:44:45,780 --> 01:44:47,198
Where did that thing come from?
2140
01:44:47,406 --> 01:44:49,950
Brunt had to dig though
so many garbages,
2141
01:44:50,159 --> 01:44:52,119
and, like, he chopped it off with a saw
2142
01:44:52,328 --> 01:44:56,248
and put it in that jar so we can
sell it on Facebook Marketplace.
2143
01:44:56,457 --> 01:44:57,972
Because, you know, it does grant, like,
2144
01:44:58,042 --> 01:45:01,337
your darkest desires
and your deepest wishes.
2145
01:45:02,129 --> 01:45:04,507
But where did it come from?
2146
01:45:04,715 --> 01:45:06,717
Well, it all started
2147
01:45:06,926 --> 01:45:10,471
a hell a, hell a long ass time ago...
2148
01:45:10,805 --> 01:45:12,264
There were these, like,
2149
01:45:12,473 --> 01:45:17,812
dirty, super nasty,
grody ass, dirty miner guys...
2150
01:45:18,020 --> 01:45:20,439
[meaty squelching]
139400
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof