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"South Park: S16E06"
"I should have never gone ziplining"
Original air date 18 April, 2012
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Sync & corrections by MaxiZephyr
www.addic7ed.com
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?I'm goin' down to south park
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?Gonna have myself a time
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?Friendly faces everywhere
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?Humble folks without
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?Temptation
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?I'm goin' down to south park
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?Gonna leave my woes behind
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?Ample parking day or night,
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?People spouting, "howdy,
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?Neighbor"
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?I'm headin' down to south park
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?Gonna see if I can't unwind
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?Murpph mmmph mmph mmmph mrrr
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?Mff mrmmph! Murpph mmmph mmph
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?Mmmph mrrr mff mrmmph!
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?So come on down to south park,
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?And meet some friends of mine
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Kyle, Kyle, Kyle!
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Four young boys in Colorado,
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are on a trip from hell.
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Ahhh, I can't take it!
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Somebody help us.
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Trapped in an unforgiving
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mountain wilderness with no way out.
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Ahhh.
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The fourth graders are in a
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nightmare they can not escape.
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We were stuck,
we were completely stuck.
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Kyle, hurry!
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Kyle, wake up, you got to
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wake up, Kyle!
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The four elementary school boys,
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an ordinary day becomes
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a descent into madness
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on tonight's episode of
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"I should have never gone ziplining."
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Help, we're trap.
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We have to get out of here.
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It's the last day of spring break.
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and all over the small mountain
town of South Park
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students are trying to have
as much fun as possible.
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For 10-year-old Stan Marsh and
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his friends Kyle, Eric and Kenny,
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the last day has come too soon.
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We really spent the whole
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spring break watching TV and
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playing Xbox, you know.
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So, we wanted to go out and
do something really adventurous.
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We can go to the city pool
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they have a water slide.
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No I'm not getting into the
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pool with Kenny he has herpes.
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What?
Look at his lips.
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You've got herpes, dude.
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I don't have herpes.
It's a cold sore.
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Yeah, cold sore is what
girls call it Kenny.
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It's actually herpes.
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Come on guys, the day is wasting away.
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What would be something really cool
we can do.
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And then like, out of nowhere
somebody came up with the idea of
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ziplining.
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Yeah, ziplining that could be
really cool.
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We've definitely not done that before.
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I think, there is a place
just outside of town.
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I will see if my Uncle Jimbo
will drop us off.
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Cool, ziplining.
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Ziplining. Hell ya.
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Within 30 minutes,
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the boys are getting a ride to
the ziplining outfield
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from Stan's uncle Jimbo.
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We were in a good mood,
just joking around you know,
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mostly aking fun of Kenny's herpes.
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See Kenny, you have herpes dude.
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I almost touched it
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Did you hear that guys.
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Kenny says it's just a fever blister.
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You sound like a chick, Kenny.
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That's herpes, dude.
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You have that until you die.
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It's the ideal spring break getaway
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with friends and laughter.
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Hey, you guys here for
the 2:00 o'clock ziplining tour.
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Ya.
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Alright.
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Let me get you some helmets
and some gear and
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we'll get up there and
hit that fresh nar nar.
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And so they put us in
these harnesses and helmets.
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I-- I think that's when
we started realizing
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"Oh, wow.
This is actually pretty dangerous."
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Alright. You guys look ready to zipline.
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Ya.
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Okay, just follow me to
the waiting room
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and we'll have you take a seat
with the others.
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And we were like, "Others."
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We have to do with this other people.
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Hi, there.
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Hello.
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Hi.
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The boys have just made
a sobering discovery.
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For 10-year-old Stan Marsh,
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the realization that he will be with a
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tour group has caused his
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adrenal gland to slow down.
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The average human acts a certain
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way when surrounded by
friends and family.
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But in a tour group the brain has to
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work overtime acting nice and
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pretending to care about people
on the tour.
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Hey, how are you?
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Good, how are you?
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So, then we sit there for
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like 30 minutes.
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Because we have to wait for
this couple who is running late.
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Alright our last zipliners
are here.
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Sorry, we made you wait everybody.
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Inside Kyle's mouth
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the muscles contract to force a smile.
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Even though in his brain,
Kyle is thinking, "Dude
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**** You.
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We don't mind.
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Now everyone was there, we
thought things will start getting fun
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but that's when we had to watch this
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safety video.
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Welcome to Backcountry Adventures.
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Hey, there, Michael.
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Hey there, Michael.
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It was I don't know 10 maybe
15 minutes of pure hell.
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Oh, and don't forget to
take in the nar.
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Back to you, Michael.
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Thanks, Michael.
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Anybody have any questions?
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No.
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I have a question.
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Could we review the best ways to
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hold the rope again.
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Really, you're going to make
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us listen to it again, because
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you couldn't understand, really?
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Let's get out there and get zipping.
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Jesus Christ.
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Finally.
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The boys think their ordeal is over.
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But what they don't realize
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is that things are about to go
from bad to worse.
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Here we go, guys.
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Ziplining.
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Everyone just step on in the shuttle.
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Shuttle?
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How, how long do we have to
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take the shuttle.
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It's about 45 minutes.
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It's a devastating blow.
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For Kyle it's almost too much to bare.
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His brain is already lacking excitement.
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And now just the word "shuttle"
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makes Kyle's brain fire neurons
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that bring up memories of just how lame
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shuttles can be.
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Well, come on we don't have a choice.
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Alright, guys should be about
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45 minutes to the freshest nar nar.
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Why don't we go around the van
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to get to know each other a little bit.
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That's okay.
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My name is Pete Knickels and
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this is my wife Donna.
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And to make a long story short
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we came out here to see
our relatives living down in Moab.
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They have lived there about
20 years now.
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And long story short, they told us
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that as long as we're in the rockies
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we should try ziplining.
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So long story short we looked around in
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the newspapers, on the internet,
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on billboards, and you know--
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make a long story short we found this
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company and thought we'd give her a try.
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So, then we called and made a reservation
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and that's when, you know---
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long story short--
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we just--
Aah!
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It's almost 3:00 o'clock.
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and the boys are still on the shuttle.
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We're getting close.
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You guys getting psyched?
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But what the boys don't realize
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is that a massive storm is brewing.
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Last night Eric Cartman had
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Kung Pao spaghetti from California
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pizza kitchen.
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Inside his stomach the Kung Pao has
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just met with the Del Taco
he ate for breakfast.
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It has already started to
tear down the layers of
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the barbecue BK toppers that had been
building up for months.
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00:07:06,137 --> 00:07:09,615
And now, to compensate for
all the annoying tourists,
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Eric is ingesting massive amounts
of Mountain Dew.
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The caffein and sugar turns
the soupy fast food liquid
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in his stomach into a toxic gas.
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When the gas is released, it carries
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with it tiny particles into
Eric's fecal matter.
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Fecal matter which floats up and
into Kyle's nasal passage.
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Dude, did you fart?
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No.
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Alright, guys.
We're here.
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Thank God.
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Alright, here we are.
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Looks like we've got
some good nar
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to zipline through today.
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Before we climb up and start ziplining
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does anyone care to know
about these trees' biology.
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The trees' biology.
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We're running a little late but if
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anyone really wants to know --
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we can take a few minutes.
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I think we're good.
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I would like to know about
the biology of the trees.
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00:07:56,764 --> 00:07:58,847
Okay, well this is a ponderosa pine.
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It covers a more extensive area
than other Americ--
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00:08:01,704 --> 00:08:02,965
So after asshole gets his
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00:08:02,965 --> 00:08:05,308
biology lesson we finally
get to go ziplining.
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Alright, remember to keep your hands
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clear of the cable and just let your
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00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:12,206
equipment do the work.
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00:08:12,206 --> 00:08:14,424
Now when you're about half way down the
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zipline the cameras gonna take
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your picture.
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00:08:17,044 --> 00:08:19,283
So when I call out "shaka bra"
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00:08:19,283 --> 00:08:23,093
look up and give the camera
a nice shaka bra.
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00:08:23,988 --> 00:08:25,786
Alright you ready?
Ya.
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00:08:25,786 --> 00:08:28,185
Ready to do some zipping?
Ya.
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00:08:28,185 --> 00:08:30,922
Alright, let's hear you say zipline.
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00:08:30,922 --> 00:08:32,687
Zipline.
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00:08:36,482 --> 00:08:39,240
Shaka bra.
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00:08:42,317 --> 00:08:44,971
Woohhoo! Alright nice zip.
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00:08:44,971 --> 00:08:47,382
Well, how was it, Cartman.
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Totally ****ing stupid, dude,
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Oh, really.
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00:08:51,989 --> 00:08:54,759
Ya, dude it's ****ing boring as shit.
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Alright Carl, give me a zipline.
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00:08:58,575 --> 00:08:59,307
Zipline.
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00:09:03,318 --> 00:09:05,817
Shaka bra.
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00:09:08,947 --> 00:09:10,485
It was like having the life
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00:09:10,485 --> 00:09:11,384
sucked out of you.
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00:09:11,452 --> 00:09:13,765
That's all it is sliding down a cable.
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00:09:13,765 --> 00:09:15,231
Maybe without a tour group it
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00:09:15,300 --> 00:09:16,899
would be kind of fun, maybe.
249
00:09:16,968 --> 00:09:21,020
But, this is just a complete disaster.
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00:09:21,020 --> 00:09:23,414
After a grueling 20 minutes
251
00:09:23,414 --> 00:09:25,150
waiting for everyone else to
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00:09:25,150 --> 00:09:27,042
ride the zipline the boys
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realize they have just wasted hours
of their time.
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And that is when the
unthinkable happens.
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00:09:33,502 --> 00:09:35,039
Alright guys let's get moving.
256
00:09:35,039 --> 00:09:37,670
Only ten minutes to our next zipline.
257
00:09:37,670 --> 00:09:39,019
Ya!
258
00:09:39,019 --> 00:09:40,937
The next zipline,
259
00:09:40,937 --> 00:09:42,435
what are you talking about?
260
00:09:42,435 --> 00:09:45,095
Excuse me, we're not going back,
are we done.
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00:09:45,095 --> 00:09:46,376
This is a zipline tour we
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00:09:46,376 --> 00:09:47,859
have sixteen more to go.
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00:09:47,859 --> 00:09:49,530
It was like, wham.
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00:09:49,530 --> 00:09:51,364
No, no, no, no!
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Everyone back in the shuttle.
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00:09:53,067 --> 00:09:56,094
The boys realize that their
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00:09:56,094 --> 00:09:57,868
ziplining nightmare has only
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00:09:57,868 --> 00:09:58,951
just begun.
269
00:09:58,951 --> 00:10:00,450
Aaahhh!
270
00:10:00,519 --> 00:10:02,669
Anyone have questions about the creek
271
00:10:02,669 --> 00:10:03,635
we're about to cross.
272
00:10:03,804 --> 00:10:04,969
Yes.
273
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:07,939
Aaahh!
274
00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:17,349
Let her rip!
275
00:10:17,418 --> 00:10:18,917
Zipline!
276
00:10:18,986 --> 00:10:20,952
Four young boys in Colorado
277
00:10:21,021 --> 00:10:22,788
are on a trip from hell.
278
00:10:22,856 --> 00:10:26,444
Zipline up here we call it the
Terminator.
279
00:10:26,460 --> 00:10:27,325
Ahh!
280
00:10:27,394 --> 00:10:29,202
Trapped in an unforgiving
281
00:10:29,202 --> 00:10:31,166
mountain wilderness with a tour group.
282
00:10:31,166 --> 00:10:33,345
But you know to make a long story short
283
00:10:33,345 --> 00:10:34,577
I woke up this morning.
284
00:10:36,319 --> 00:10:38,262
Could you get another picture
of us?
285
00:10:38,262 --> 00:10:39,595
Ahhh!
286
00:10:39,664 --> 00:10:41,609
The fourth graders are in a
287
00:10:41,609 --> 00:10:43,602
nightmare they cannot escape.
288
00:10:43,602 --> 00:10:49,672
I ****
289
00:10:52,691 --> 00:10:54,534
Woohh!
290
00:10:54,534 --> 00:10:55,885
Nice zip.
291
00:10:55,885 --> 00:10:57,484
Alright, you're going next, Ricky.
292
00:10:59,763 --> 00:11:01,496
Help, help!
293
00:11:01,565 --> 00:11:03,899
Somebody, somebody we're
294
00:11:03,967 --> 00:11:04,232
trapped!
295
00:11:04,301 --> 00:11:06,334
Somebody help us!
296
00:11:06,403 --> 00:11:07,502
It's no use.
297
00:11:07,571 --> 00:11:09,070
There is nobody around for
298
00:11:09,139 --> 00:11:09,371
miles.
299
00:11:09,439 --> 00:11:10,536
There could be a helicopter.
300
00:11:10,536 --> 00:11:11,646
Maybe one will fly over head.
301
00:11:11,646 --> 00:11:13,310
Face it, Stan, nobody is
302
00:11:13,310 --> 00:11:13,941
coming for us.
303
00:11:16,526 --> 00:11:18,041
We should've never listened
to you, Cal.
304
00:11:18,041 --> 00:11:19,461
Me.
305
00:11:19,461 --> 00:11:21,125
Ya you, in the park this morning.
306
00:11:21,125 --> 00:11:22,925
Let's go ziplining we haven't
307
00:11:22,994 --> 00:11:23,893
done that before.
308
00:11:23,962 --> 00:11:25,494
Oh no, don't try to pin this on me.
309
00:11:25,563 --> 00:11:26,581
You're the one who brought it up.
310
00:11:26,581 --> 00:11:27,681
I brought it up because you
311
00:11:27,681 --> 00:11:28,508
already brought it up.
312
00:11:28,508 --> 00:11:30,512
That's when I realized
nobody remembered,
313
00:11:30,512 --> 00:11:32,667
nobody remembered it was me
who came up
314
00:11:32,667 --> 00:11:33,737
with the idea to go ziplining.
315
00:11:33,880 --> 00:11:34,915
Me.
316
00:11:34,915 --> 00:11:36,260
You fat piece of shit.
317
00:11:36,786 --> 00:11:39,673
Guys, does it really matter
whose idea it was?
318
00:11:39,673 --> 00:11:40,322
Yes.
319
00:11:40,322 --> 00:11:42,007
Alright we can make it, you guys.
320
00:11:42,007 --> 00:11:42,959
we can't panic.
321
00:11:42,959 --> 00:11:45,516
If the four of us don't zipline
the tour will move faster.
322
00:11:45,516 --> 00:11:47,924
We are gonna make it out of here,
okay.
323
00:11:49,692 --> 00:11:51,389
But what the boys don't realize
324
00:11:51,389 --> 00:11:53,832
is that Eric's body is already
shutting down
325
00:11:53,832 --> 00:11:55,709
from stage four diarrhoea.
326
00:11:55,709 --> 00:12:00,427
Inside his stomach, bile has just
dislodged in arbie's ultimate angus.
327
00:12:00,427 --> 00:12:02,394
In the average human this
328
00:12:02,394 --> 00:12:04,218
would only have caused mild diarrhoea.
329
00:12:04,218 --> 00:12:06,268
But Eric cartman is now drinking
330
00:12:06,268 --> 00:12:07,232
Double Dew.
331
00:12:07,232 --> 00:12:08,497
A Mountain Dew product with
332
00:12:08,497 --> 00:12:09,871
twice the sugar and caffeine
333
00:12:09,871 --> 00:12:10,996
of regular Mountain Dew.
334
00:12:11,194 --> 00:12:14,584
His **** feces is now rapidly
converting to a thick paste.
335
00:12:14,933 --> 00:12:16,089
The diarrhoea shoots out of
336
00:12:16,089 --> 00:12:18,226
Eric's anus and into his underwear.
337
00:12:18,226 --> 00:12:21,111
Eric Cartmen is a ticking time bomb.
338
00:12:21,111 --> 00:12:23,995
Dude, did you just shit your pants.
339
00:12:23,995 --> 00:12:25,766
No.
340
00:12:25,766 --> 00:12:28,083
So, I just tried to keep the tour
341
00:12:28,083 --> 00:12:30,298
group moving as fast as possible.
342
00:12:31,414 --> 00:12:32,735
Alright guy this is is where
343
00:12:32,735 --> 00:12:34,133
we're gonna break for lunch.
344
00:12:34,133 --> 00:12:36,292
Come in by the waterfall gang.
345
00:12:36,292 --> 00:12:39,778
Oh, no.
Could we skip lunch and keep going.
346
00:12:39,778 --> 00:12:41,311
Skip a free lunch?
347
00:12:41,380 --> 00:12:42,112
Not me.
348
00:12:44,459 --> 00:12:45,820
Who wants sandwiches.
349
00:12:45,820 --> 00:12:47,405
We got turkey.
350
00:12:47,405 --> 00:12:50,406
Ham.
351
00:12:50,474 --> 00:12:51,574
Turkey ham.
352
00:12:51,642 --> 00:12:54,376
Long story short --
353
00:12:54,445 --> 00:12:57,245
Oh, you guys seriously,
354
00:12:57,245 --> 00:12:58,526
something is wrong in my tummy.
355
00:12:58,526 --> 00:13:01,811
Then stop drinking
Double Dew, fat ass.
356
00:13:01,811 --> 00:13:03,326
This is diet Double Dew, Kyle
357
00:13:03,326 --> 00:13:04,799
it only has half the caffeine and
358
00:13:04,799 --> 00:13:05,647
sugar of Double Dew.
359
00:13:05,647 --> 00:13:10,435
I have to get to the bathroom fast.
360
00:13:10,435 --> 00:13:12,478
You're in the forest.
Go take a crap.
361
00:13:12,478 --> 00:13:14,902
If I crap in the woods,
the blood will attract beavers, Kyle.
362
00:13:14,902 --> 00:13:17,603
Hey, I'm so sorry but
we have an emergency.
363
00:13:17,672 --> 00:13:20,077
Our friend is really, really sick.
364
00:13:20,077 --> 00:13:22,142
Oh you mean the little kid
with the herpes?
365
00:13:22,142 --> 00:13:23,755
Ya.
366
00:13:23,755 --> 00:13:25,660
That's not herpes, it's cold sore.
367
00:13:25,660 --> 00:13:26,958
Right, sorry.
368
00:13:26,958 --> 00:13:30,592
Yeah, his cold sore is really bad
and he's losing blood. So, we gotta go.
369
00:13:30,592 --> 00:13:32,778
Geez sorry dude,
But we're at the summit.
370
00:13:32,778 --> 00:13:34,574
The only way down is to zip down.
371
00:13:36,753 --> 00:13:37,796
What about the stables.
372
00:13:37,796 --> 00:13:40,052
The stables there is a ranch
373
00:13:40,052 --> 00:13:41,869
past the hill that rents horses.
374
00:13:41,869 --> 00:13:43,240
I think they can get you back.
375
00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:46,285
Suddenly, Stan says he knows
about some horse stables.
376
00:13:46,285 --> 00:13:47,942
It seemed too good to be true.
377
00:13:47,942 --> 00:13:50,049
Let me get this straight.
378
00:13:50,049 --> 00:13:51,448
You want four horses one for
379
00:13:51,517 --> 00:13:52,316
each of you.
380
00:13:52,385 --> 00:13:53,017
Yes, please.
381
00:13:53,085 --> 00:13:55,152
I think we can set you up.
382
00:13:55,221 --> 00:13:57,054
Thank God.
383
00:13:57,123 --> 00:13:58,728
See, guys this is gonna
be sweet after all.
384
00:13:58,958 --> 00:13:59,723
Step out here.
385
00:13:59,792 --> 00:14:01,192
We will get you going.
386
00:14:01,260 --> 00:14:04,095
Got four more for you,
387
00:14:04,095 --> 00:14:04,826
Duncan.
388
00:14:04,826 --> 00:14:06,437
Hi.
389
00:14:06,437 --> 00:14:08,245
No!
390
00:14:08,245 --> 00:14:10,812
Four young boys in Colorado
391
00:14:10,881 --> 00:14:12,714
are on a trip from hell.
392
00:14:12,783 --> 00:14:17,052
Ahh!
393
00:14:17,121 --> 00:14:18,528
Trapped in a tour group on
394
00:14:18,528 --> 00:14:20,127
horseback that is only allowed
395
00:14:20,196 --> 00:14:22,574
to travel four miles an hour.
396
00:14:22,574 --> 00:14:24,374
Can we please, please,
397
00:14:24,443 --> 00:14:24,708
please.
398
00:14:24,777 --> 00:14:26,710
Go faster.
399
00:14:26,779 --> 00:14:29,030
We got some lunch set up for
400
00:14:29,030 --> 00:14:29,747
you up ahead.
401
00:14:29,747 --> 00:14:31,955
Some turkey sandwichs
and diet Double Dew.
402
00:14:33,384 --> 00:14:34,250
Oh, no.
403
00:14:36,130 --> 00:14:38,368
So, long story short I was born
404
00:14:38,368 --> 00:14:40,234
in 1953 at 6:00 in the morning.
405
00:14:40,303 --> 00:14:41,700
An attempt to make a bad day
406
00:14:41,700 --> 00:14:43,600
better becomes a descent into
407
00:14:43,669 --> 00:14:45,766
madness on "I should have never
408
00:14:45,766 --> 00:14:47,186
thought horseback riding would be
409
00:14:47,186 --> 00:14:48,783
any better than ziplining."
410
00:14:50,022 --> 00:14:54,837
This here waterfall is called
411
00:14:54,837 --> 00:14:56,049
Heartbreak Falls.
412
00:14:56,049 --> 00:14:58,258
Would you like to know why it's
413
00:14:58,258 --> 00:14:59,357
called Heartbreak Falls.
414
00:14:59,426 --> 00:15:00,659
I certainly would.
415
00:15:00,727 --> 00:15:01,226
Ya.
416
00:15:01,295 --> 00:15:04,029
Kyle, Kyle, Kyle.
417
00:15:04,097 --> 00:15:04,763
Come on wake up.
418
00:15:04,831 --> 00:15:06,097
Just go, go without me.
419
00:15:06,166 --> 00:15:08,257
No, we're not leaving you here, Kyle.
420
00:15:08,257 --> 00:15:09,901
I can't take it anymore.
421
00:15:09,901 --> 00:15:12,407
Why do people say "long story short."
422
00:15:12,407 --> 00:15:14,467
They're not making it short, Stan.
423
00:15:14,467 --> 00:15:18,075
I just sat there watching Kyle die.
424
00:15:18,075 --> 00:15:21,859
I wanted to tell him the truth
right then and there but then
425
00:15:21,859 --> 00:15:23,656
a fire rose up inside of me.
426
00:15:23,656 --> 00:15:25,597
I thought I can find us a way out.
427
00:15:25,597 --> 00:15:27,386
I ran off and went searching for
428
00:15:27,386 --> 00:15:28,948
I don't know how long, 12 minutes.
429
00:15:28,948 --> 00:15:32,293
and that's when I found it.
You guys, get up.
430
00:15:32,385 --> 00:15:33,295
Listen to me.
431
00:15:33,295 --> 00:15:34,544
There is a lake a hundred yards
432
00:15:34,544 --> 00:15:35,234
down that way.
433
00:15:35,234 --> 00:15:37,151
There is a marina with boats
just sitting there.
434
00:15:37,151 --> 00:15:37,893
A marina.
435
00:15:37,893 --> 00:15:39,294
We can take a boat, you guys.
436
00:15:39,294 --> 00:15:41,308
We can probably take it all the way
back to Fairplay.
437
00:15:41,308 --> 00:15:42,219
What's the point?
438
00:15:42,219 --> 00:15:44,208
Come on, you guys.
A boat all to ourselves.
439
00:15:44,208 --> 00:15:44,929
It could be fun.
440
00:15:44,929 --> 00:15:46,300
What could possibly go wrong.
441
00:15:46,300 --> 00:15:48,086
The following program
442
00:15:48,086 --> 00:15:49,858
contains graphic re-enactments
443
00:15:49,858 --> 00:15:51,180
that maybe disturbing to some
444
00:15:51,180 --> 00:15:52,023
audience members.
445
00:15:55,176 --> 00:15:57,186
Four young boys in Colorado
446
00:15:57,186 --> 00:15:59,233
are on a trip from hell.
447
00:16:01,678 --> 00:16:03,526
Trapped on a 42-foot power
448
00:16:03,526 --> 00:16:06,987
boat which is only allowed to go
5 miles an hour.
449
00:16:06,987 --> 00:16:09,881
Because we keep getting
screwed over by your diarrhoea.
450
00:16:09,881 --> 00:16:11,297
It's not my diarrhoea's fault
451
00:16:11,297 --> 00:16:12,914
you took us all ziplining.
452
00:16:12,914 --> 00:16:13,993
You ****ing jew.
453
00:16:13,993 --> 00:16:16,305
Ziplining was your idea, fat ass.
454
00:16:16,511 --> 00:16:19,697
The fourth graders are in a
nightmare they can't escape.
455
00:16:19,697 --> 00:16:21,640
Kenny whose idea was it to
456
00:16:21,640 --> 00:16:24,026
go ziplining mine or Kyle's.
457
00:16:24,026 --> 00:16:27,141
I don't know, I don't give a shit.
458
00:16:27,141 --> 00:16:29,010
For four elementary school
459
00:16:29,010 --> 00:16:32,085
boys an already tragic day becomes a
460
00:16:32,085 --> 00:16:33,839
descent into madness on
461
00:16:33,839 --> 00:16:36,067
"I should have never gotten on a
462
00:16:36,067 --> 00:16:37,131
God damn boat."
463
00:16:38,557 --> 00:16:40,196
Boat!
464
00:16:40,196 --> 00:16:43,227
Oh no. You're not thinking
of the entire boat.
465
00:16:43,227 --> 00:16:44,307
you're taking the crap off
466
00:16:44,307 --> 00:16:45,718
the side into the water.
467
00:16:49,209 --> 00:16:53,645
Ahh!
468
00:17:05,459 --> 00:17:06,777
After cleaning Cartman's
469
00:17:06,777 --> 00:17:08,637
diarrhea and fightings off
470
00:17:08,637 --> 00:17:10,555
beavers the boys have made a
471
00:17:10,555 --> 00:17:12,495
terrifying discovery that
472
00:17:12,495 --> 00:17:15,561
boating is just as boring as ziplining.
473
00:17:15,561 --> 00:17:17,471
The boat went really slow and
474
00:17:17,471 --> 00:17:18,755
it just went around and around.
475
00:17:18,755 --> 00:17:21,528
Ahh!
476
00:17:21,528 --> 00:17:23,098
If the boys fall asleep now
477
00:17:23,098 --> 00:17:24,523
from the lack of excitement.
478
00:17:24,523 --> 00:17:25,559
They could die.
479
00:17:26,899 --> 00:17:28,532
Here, everyone drink some
480
00:17:28,532 --> 00:17:29,237
Mountain Dew.
481
00:17:29,237 --> 00:17:30,403
I don't know.
482
00:17:30,403 --> 00:17:31,422
I thought if we all drank the
483
00:17:31,422 --> 00:17:32,645
Mountain Dew the caffeine and
484
00:17:32,645 --> 00:17:33,955
sugar would help us stay awake.
485
00:17:33,955 --> 00:17:35,725
I told Cartman "You've to share it."
486
00:17:35,725 --> 00:17:37,572
I'm not sharing with Kenny.
487
00:17:37,572 --> 00:17:38,761
He has herpes.
488
00:17:48,463 --> 00:17:50,393
Four young boys in Colorado
489
00:17:50,393 --> 00:17:52,254
are on a trip from hell.
490
00:17:52,254 --> 00:17:54,988
And just when it seems it can't get
491
00:17:55,057 --> 00:17:57,291
any worse--
492
00:17:59,640 --> 00:18:02,441
Kenny.
493
00:18:02,510 --> 00:18:02,742
Kenny!
494
00:18:02,810 --> 00:18:05,522
Kenny McCormick has died of boredom.
495
00:18:05,522 --> 00:18:08,828
Oh my God they killed Kenny.
496
00:18:08,828 --> 00:18:10,398
Bastards.
497
00:18:10,398 --> 00:18:11,714
No, not they. You.
498
00:18:11,714 --> 00:18:12,899
Look what your ziplining has
499
00:18:12,899 --> 00:18:13,164
done.
500
00:18:13,233 --> 00:18:15,233
You killed Kenny you're the bastard.
501
00:18:15,301 --> 00:18:17,501
It wasn't my idea. It was yours.
You killed Kenny, you
502
00:18:17,570 --> 00:18:18,584
bastard.
503
00:18:18,584 --> 00:18:22,575
Finally I couldn't hold it in anymore.
504
00:18:22,575 --> 00:18:23,831
I said, stop it.
505
00:18:23,831 --> 00:18:26,332
Stop it!
506
00:18:26,401 --> 00:18:27,466
It was me.
507
00:18:27,535 --> 00:18:31,637
My idea.
508
00:18:31,706 --> 00:18:34,373
You?
509
00:18:34,442 --> 00:18:38,360
Four days ago I came across a
510
00:18:38,360 --> 00:18:39,875
brochure for ziplining.
511
00:18:45,849 --> 00:18:49,017
I thought it would be fun.
512
00:18:49,086 --> 00:18:51,119
I only acted like it was an idea
513
00:18:51,188 --> 00:18:55,257
we all came up with together.
514
00:18:56,728 --> 00:18:59,020
So, you intended for us to go
515
00:18:59,020 --> 00:19:00,701
ziplining all along.
516
00:19:00,701 --> 00:19:05,471
Why, Stan?
517
00:19:05,540 --> 00:19:08,073
If you sign up three friends
518
00:19:08,142 --> 00:19:13,245
you get a free iPod Nano.
519
00:19:13,314 --> 00:19:17,650
You sold us out for an iPod
520
00:19:17,718 --> 00:19:19,155
Nano?
521
00:19:19,155 --> 00:19:21,555
I had no idea ziplining would
522
00:19:21,624 --> 00:19:23,123
be so boring.
523
00:19:23,192 --> 00:19:28,462
You, you killed Kenny.
524
00:19:28,531 --> 00:19:31,165
You bastard!
525
00:19:31,233 --> 00:19:34,702
You bastard, Stan!
526
00:19:45,181 --> 00:19:47,938
How many iPod Nanos is
527
00:19:47,938 --> 00:19:48,763
friendship worth?
528
00:19:48,763 --> 00:19:50,843
I guess one.
529
00:19:50,843 --> 00:19:53,867
The hardest part about it is
530
00:19:53,867 --> 00:19:55,875
knowing you can't take it back.
531
00:19:55,875 --> 00:19:58,762
I mean it was a fifth generation nano
532
00:19:58,762 --> 00:20:00,371
so I can't trade it in any where.
533
00:20:00,371 --> 00:20:03,688
But then miraculously the boys
534
00:20:03,688 --> 00:20:05,468
prayers are finally answered.
535
00:20:05,468 --> 00:20:07,395
It was a miracle he came to
536
00:20:07,395 --> 00:20:09,027
save us and take us back home.
537
00:20:09,027 --> 00:20:10,193
You came for us.
538
00:20:10,261 --> 00:20:12,462
Mr. Hankey.
Thank you.
539
00:20:12,530 --> 00:20:17,207
Howdy hoe, boys, let's get
540
00:20:17,207 --> 00:20:20,442
you back home.
541
00:20:23,273 --> 00:20:23,933
We were saved.
542
00:20:23,933 --> 00:20:24,799
It was over.
543
00:20:24,868 --> 00:20:27,321
After nearly four hours in
544
00:20:27,321 --> 00:20:29,360
the Colorado wilderness the boys
545
00:20:29,360 --> 00:20:31,011
are finally going home.
546
00:20:31,011 --> 00:20:33,544
From the boat, the boys were
547
00:20:33,544 --> 00:20:34,879
airlifted aboard Mr. Hankey's
548
00:20:34,879 --> 00:20:36,427
magical helicraptor.
549
00:20:36,427 --> 00:20:39,586
In the four hours since they
have left home the boys had
550
00:20:39,586 --> 00:20:40,633
travelled so far
551
00:20:40,633 --> 00:20:44,160
that Mr. Hankey then had to fly
them on the 7 turdy 7.
552
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:48,942
From there it was only an hour ride
back home on the Poochoo express.
553
00:20:48,942 --> 00:20:53,538
Four friends torn apart by tragedy
would now start the long
554
00:20:53,538 --> 00:20:55,515
journey back to forgiveness,
555
00:20:55,515 --> 00:20:57,351
Kenny McCormicks remains were
556
00:20:57,351 --> 00:21:00,350
finally brought home to his parents and
557
00:21:00,350 --> 00:21:02,250
the boys received treatment for
558
00:21:02,318 --> 00:21:02,950
their herpes.
559
00:21:03,019 --> 00:21:04,485
No, I didn't get herpes.
560
00:21:04,554 --> 00:21:05,622
I just had a cold sore.
561
00:21:05,622 --> 00:21:08,861
Kyle Bratkowski spent 27 days in the
562
00:21:08,861 --> 00:21:10,716
hospital having fecal matter removed
563
00:21:10,716 --> 00:21:12,261
from his nasal passages.
564
00:21:12,261 --> 00:21:15,399
Stan Marsh dedicated himself to raise an
565
00:21:15,399 --> 00:21:19,639
awareness about the boredom risks
of ziplining. His awareness videos became
566
00:21:19,639 --> 00:21:23,364
so popular that Stan once
again ended up jacking it in
567
00:21:23,364 --> 00:21:23,963
San Diego.
568
00:21:24,031 --> 00:21:28,930
As for Eric Cartman, he refused to let the
tragedy stop him from doing
569
00:21:28,930 --> 00:21:29,800
what he loves most.
570
00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:33,763
In just two weeks, he was back to
drinking diet Double Dew.
571
00:21:33,763 --> 00:21:36,539
Defiant to do the math.
572
00:21:36,539 --> 00:21:39,698
It's diet dude.
Diet soda doesn't give you diarrhoea.
573
00:21:39,698 --> 00:21:44,679
Sync & crrections by MaxiZephyr
www.addic7ed.com
36795
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