Original subtitles

The fact remains he has twice robbed and twice assaulted...

an operative of the United States Secret Service and...

Well, he's not denying that.

So there's nothing to do but to remove him for trial...

to the federal court in Council Bluffs.

The prisoner will step down and, uh, face the court.

Hello, glad to see you again.

Do you remember Samantha Crawford...

the girl who played stud poker according to Hoyle?

All of you who've asked to see her again will be glad to know...

that she's co-starring with my brother Bart, Jack Kelly...

in this week's show, "The Savage Hills."

Oh, uh...

I understand you're moving up to 306, Mr. Gunnerson.

- Something wrong with this one? - Hot night.

There's more air on the third floor.

It would have been cooler in here if he opened that window.

Dinner's being served in the dining room, sir.

I'm gonna sleep first and eat later.

Boy, would you get out here and grab my bags?

Here you are.

Thanks.

See here, young fellow, you tell that room clerk...

I wouldn't have changed rooms if I wanted everybody to know.

You hear me? Mm-hm.

- Now, can you hear me? - I hear you, Mr. Gunnerson.

Don't move.

Well...

Hello.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Why, I declare, but I seem to be in the wrong room, don't I?

Yes, ma'am, ha, ha, with your hand in the wrong pocket.

Oh, ha, ha.

Oh, this is ridiculous.

Oh, well, I naturally thought you were my husband...

and I naturally go through his pockets every night, ha, ha.

Naturally.

Uh, but with a gun in your hand?

- Well, one can't be too careful, can one? - True.

One never knows who might come sneaking into one's room, does one?

Oh, now, see here.

Why, do you, by any chance think that I purposely came into your room...

- with the intent of robbing you? - Yes, ma'am.

Well, I declare this is a most humiliating experience.

I think I just better run along now before I lose my temper.

Think you better stay right here.

Really, sir, I have no intention of staying

in a strange hotel room with a strange man.

I'll tell you what.

You stay and I'll go.

Whatever for?

The sheriff, ma'am. He's right downstairs.

Oh, honestly, aren't you carrying this joke a little too far?

Well, my sense of humor does get away from me.

I wouldn't want you to do the same.

All right. We're going to settle this thing right now.

I'll go see the sheriff with you.

Oh, now, that's very generous of you, ma'am.

But, uh, if you left the room, I'd have no proof you broke in, would I?

You, sir, are no gentleman.

Why, you're finding out about me already.

I'll just lock the evidence in...

bring the sheriff up...

and, uh, your husband, he can bail you out.

- How's that? - Oh.

Um, um...

I did tell just one tiny fib.

No.

Um, I'm not married.

Uh, oh.

Does that make a difference, ha, ha?

Yes.

Means your husband can't bail you out.

By the way, that's a two-story drop out the window.

You could crush quite a few magnolia pedals if you try.

Samantha Crawford.

Thirty-one hundred dollars and 50 cents.

Samantha Crawford.

Well, I thought you were bringing the sheriff.

I see.

Uh, variations on a familiar theme, is that it?

Oh, oh, this? Oh.

I was just gonna tell him that you and me had a little old spat...

and you got in a big snit and walked out on me.

Oh, honey, you're full of fun tonight.

But why?

Samantha Crawford has $3100 in the bank.

So you don't need the money, and you've got just about everything else.

So, what did you want from me?

Oh, you're a sly one, Mr. Gunnerson, as if you didn't know.

Would it make any difference that I'm not Mr. Gunnerson?

Well, it most certainly would.

Well, I'm most certainly not.

Well, that isn't fair.

Well, then you're here under false pretenses.

Aren't we all?

Gunnerson did have this suite, but he moved out and I moved in.

- My name is Bart Maverick. - Maverick.

- Sound familiar? - Oh, no. No, no.

Oh, well, it is an odd one.

Ha, ha, I thought mavericks had four legs.

A couple of us have two each. Me and my brother, Bret.

But your name does sound familiar.

- I could have heard it from him. - Oh, I doubt that.

Let's talk about Mr. Gunnerson. Do you know where he is?

Yeah.

Where?

Before I tell you, I better find out why you're so eager to pick his pockets?

I suppose I may as well tell you. I have nothing to hide.

Well, I wouldn't say that.

But go on.

All right.

Well, it just so happens, Mr. Maverick, that I'm with the Secret Service.

- Of course, undercover work. - Oh, don't be so smug.

Rip open the lining to my purse. There you'll find my credentials.

Just doesn't make sense, Samantha.

If you're a federal agent, you wouldn't be ducking a local sheriff.

Oh, fiddlesticks.

If I let him know who I am, he'd want to chisel in on the reward.

Reward?

- For what, Gunnerson? - No, no. He's not important.

Two months ago, we broke up a ring that was putting out counterfeit treasuries.

Gunnerson got away with the engraving plates.

The reward's for the recovering of the plates.

- You believe me, don't you? - No, ma'am.

But I could be convinced if we find those plates.

- We? - That's right.

And I'm even willing to share the reward fifty-fifty.

Fifty-fifty?

Should've taken your chances with the sheriff, Sam.

Well, I don't intend to split any reward money with you.

That's too bad, because I'd have to go after those plates myself...

if I wanted to check up on your story.

And I just hate putting myself in any trouble that doesn't turn a profit.

Besides, I know where Gunnerson is and you don't.

Then I'll just follow you.

Fair enough.

Of course, you're gonna look a bit peculiar traipsing through the halls, um...

out of uniform.

Seem to have me at a disadvantage, sir.

Do we have a deal?

We have a deal.

Catch.

This girl comes to your hotel room, tries to rob you...

you go for the sheriff, she hops into bed.

You come back, she tells you she's a Secret Service agent and I'm a crook.

So you team up with her to rob me to, uh, get the reward, is that the way it goes?

I wish I could say no.

She sure must have been a charmer.

Dripping honeysuckle, Mr. Gunnerson.

She didn't tell me you were a Secret Service agent.

You still say you don't know where she is.

That's right.

Well, I think you do.

And I intend to find out because I have to find out.

You'll know why when you take a look at this.

Nice.

That's not Samantha.

Didn't say it was. That's my wife.

Oh.

Name's Norah.

- Lovely girl. - Ha, ha, yes, sir.

Six months married. Still a bride, Norah is.

Uh, you're wondering why a lovely girl like

that should marry an old duffer like myself?

Well, uh, some girls prefer the mature type.

- Don't be nice. It doesn't suit you. - Sorry.

I, uh, wonder myself...

and I figured I just got lucky.

But getting lucky and staying lucky are different things.

That's right.

What I mean is, there comes a time when the honeymoon is over...

when she takes a look at what she's married...

and knows what a big mistake she made.

I don't know.

You may have endearing qualities I haven't seen.

I don't.

Besides, Norah doesn't care for endearing quality. She cares for money.

Now, that's the most endearing quality of all.

So I figure if I'm gonna hold on to her, I've gotta have money.

- The reward money, for instance. - Right.

I figure you cost me that.

Ten thousand dollars.

What's more important, I figure you may have cost me a desk job in Washington...

where I could come home every night to Norah.

And it could end up that you cost me Norah.

- What's all this gonna cost me? - Twenty years.

Or you can tell me where I can catch up

with Samantha, and I'll get you out with 10.

No.

No deal, Mr. Gunnerson.

I wanna catch up with her as much as you do, and I lied.

I do know where Samantha is.

But if I take you to her and we get those plates back...

I still want my half of the reward, $5000.

Fifty-fifty? What kind of a fool do you take me for?

It means more than 5000 to you, the desk job, Washington...

- going home to Norah every night? - Hmm.

Now, think about it, Mr. Gunnerson, but think fast.

We may still have time to catch her if we leave now.

All right. It's a deal.

If we don't get those plates, you'll get...

I know, I know, 20 years.

Get me out of here.

Now what do we do?

Well, we might wave goodbye.

- Where's she heading? - Ticket said Grand Isle.

The next steam boat stop is Whetstone.

We can telegraph Samantha's description to the sheriff.

You'll get no description out of me.

Look, Gunnerson, we don't want some local constable cutting in on that reward.

Might even be two of them.

We'd be lucky to end up with a four-way split.

You got a better way?

Well, the Missouri swings a lot of wide loops between here and Whetstone.

Cutting cross country is 50 miles shorter, but it's a hard ride.

If we change horses at Red Cloud...

we might catch the Western Belle before she pulls out of Whetstone.

And if we don't?

Tsk, well, then I will give you Samantha's description...

and you can wire ahead to the law at Council Bluffs.

You're idea's aren't all bad, Maverick. Let's go.

Samantha.

Well, I beg your pardon, sir. Were you addressing me?

Samantha, I'd like you to meet Mr. Gunnerson.

You two have so much in common...

both being members of the Secret Service and all.

I declare, I don't have the faintest notion what you're talking about.

- Have we been formally introduced? - Ha, ha, informally.

Look, young lady, you either have those plates in your cabin or on your person.

You hand them over, or Maverick is gonna search your cabin while I search you.

It's fifty-fifty, Gunnerson.

Oh, those silly old plates, is that what you're talking about?

Have you got them on you?

Oh, well, yes, I do.

But I would have to disrobe.

Oh, not again, Sam.

And you boys wouldn't want me catching a nasty old chill, would you?

You and Mrs. Gunnerson will probably be spending Christmas in Washington.

I've never been to Washington.

I figured that.

Treasury's still there.

Samantha must have missed it too.

Samantha? Samantha?

Samantha?

Samantha! Samantha!

Gunnerson? Gunnerson, wake up!

All right, Sam!

Let's have those plates.

Let me go! I don't have the plates. I lost them in the river.

The only thing you lost is that southern accent.

You gonna hand over those plates or do we pick up where we left off...

without benefit of screen?

All right. You win.

Ooh, a lot of good they're gonna do us now.

With no food, no weapons.

The Sioux and the Cheyenne are running wild over the territory.

- Some fine mess you got us into. - Me?

I didn't tell you to jump off that boat.

Well, I wouldn't have had to if you hadn't been such a poor loser.

Well, we're both in the same boat now or not in it, if you prefer.

- So, what do we do? - Start walking.

- Walking to where? - The nearest white settlement.

You were headed for it anyway, Grand Isle.

That's over 200 miles away.

Oh, by river boat, it's less than 100 by foot.

Well, I can't go like this. I'm soaking wet.

Well, uh, stay here till sunup then.

The Indians will hang you up to dry.

Hey. Hey, wait for me.

Oh.

- What's the matter? - Ooh.

Oh, now look.

Oh.

Well, that's easy to fix.

Ah.

Oh, you are ingenious.

- Sure. Now you won't lift. - I can't walk without heels.

Well, you can walk on your toes.

That's what the Indians do.

Indians?

Bart?

Bart?

Bart?

Bart?

- Aah! - Shh.

Would you shush? It's Bart.

Where did you go?

You trying to tell the whole Sioux nation?

I went hunting, and lucky too.

- Oh, you mean we eat? - We eat.

Come on, I'll show you.

Let's get out of here.

- There it is. - That isn't Delmonico's. What is it?

It's a Sioux death lodge, a new one.

That red blanket covers a dead warrior.

Please, do you mind if we skip the picturesque customs of the natives?

- Subject under discussion was food. - It's in the bag.

The Sioux believe it's a long journey to wanagi yata.

That's their heaven.

They leave food for the dead brave, so he won't starve on the way.

- Ooh, better him than us. - Leave it, Samantha.

They catch us robbing their death lodge, it won't be any picnic.

What would they do?

Oh, stake us out in the sun, where the ants could eat us.

Sounds a little bit like a picnic at that.

Oh...

Stay right here.

Come on, let's go.

Well, here's where we eat.

- You sure it's all right? - Of course.

The head waiter is a friend of mine.

Now, we can start on this while the champagne's cooling.

- It's delicious. What is it? - Pemmican.

Buffalo meat.

Well, what's for breakfast?

Oh, I have all your favorites.

- Scrambled eggs... - Ah...

- baked ham and pineapple... - Mm.

Blueberry muffins, apple fritters.

And guess what.

- Oh, not pemmican. - Pemmican.

- Oh, you thought of everything. - Ha, ha.

I knew you'd be pleased.

- It's not a wolf, is it? - No.

What's he saying?

He's picked up our trail.

He's alone, and he's looking for the others.

You all right?

Do you think we threw them off our trail, Bart?

We'll never do that unless we stop leaving one.

What's the use? Only birds do that.

Or fish.

More water?

Well, the Niobrara River can't be far from here.

We might find a log, float downstream a couple of miles...

and cross to the other side.

Hey, do you think you can make it?

Do I have any choice?

At least they're dry again. I can't think of anything nicer.

I'll settle for a good cigar.

Oh, that reminds me. What did you do with your matches?

They're in the coat.

They're no good. I don't know why I kept them.

I'm going to spread them out here very carefully.

Oh, don't bother, Sam, they're dead.

There might be enough sulfur left to strike once they dry off.

Still no cigar.

Hemlock leaves rolled tight.

You'll think you're in Havana.

Hey, you haven't spent all your life indoors.

No. No, my parents moved west with a wagon train out of Springfield.

We settled in Dakota when I was 5...

and they were killed by Arapaho when I was 12.

If there's one thing I've learned, it's survival.

That explains a lot of things, Sam.

Heh, what about you? How did you learn about Indians?

Oh, I had to.

My brother and I were galvanized Yankees.

We volunteered to be Indian fighters to get out of the Yankee prison.

In two years, if didn't learn about Indians, you were dead.

- Where's your brother now? - Oh, he's around St. Louis somewhere...

trying to pick up an honest dollar playing poker and such, heh.

Oh, Bret, he sure...

Poker.

That's it. That's where I heard your name.

I heard it from Bret.

You took him at poker with a pair of nines against his straight.

Oh, that's right, because according to Hoyle...

I know. Straights are not played in five-card stud...

unless it's agreed to at the start of the game.

And you took Bret for 20,000 with that little stunt.

- Ha, ha, you're not mad? - Mad?

I think it's wonderful beating Bret at his own game.

Samantha, if your name registered at that hotel, I'd have run for cover.

I'm glad you didn't.

They're here.

Duck into those bushes, I'll draw them off.

- No. - Shh.

Stay there till you hear them howling...

then start running and keep on running straight south.

- Now, get going. - Oh!

What are you saving me for? Sacrifice?

No English.

Sam.

I thought I told you to clear out. Why did you do a fool thing like this?

The plates, you still have them.

Thanks, Sam.

Thanks a lot.

That other one will be back.

He knows we've got the rifle now.

He's after those horses. We need them.

Stick close.

Take it easy. We don't wanna scare them.

I'm gonna try for the horses.

I couldn't shoot. He was on top of you.

You did all right for one night.

That third brave is probably out after the rest of the war party.

We gotta get out of here.

I wanna take that Indian's leather britches.

- What for? - For you.

You don't think I'll wear those filthy things?

No saddles. We'd be riding bareback. You'll be glad you did.

Well, I won't, that's final.

Bullet just parted the hair.

There, that looks better.

It's long, but it isn't deep. How does it feel?

Like a war dance inside.

Here, let me help.

Feel better?

Mm-hm.

- Samantha. - Mm-hm.

What were you gonna do with those plates?

Turn them over to the federal agent for the reward, what else?

Your ticket said Grand Isle...

and that's way out in the middle of nowhere.

What's the attraction out there?

Now, come on, Samantha, no secrets.

- Not after all we've been through. - I can't tell you, Bart.

Why not?

Because I can't lie to you.

- Since when? - It's true. Don't ask me when.

Lot of things have changed the past few days.

Isn't it possible I may have changed too?

I'd like to believe that.

Even harder for me to believe.

Lately I find myself wanting things I never really wanted before.

Like a rose-covered cottage, patter of tiny feet?

Sounds pretty foolish, doesn't it?

I don't know.

It might be cheaper for the Mavericks if they had you in the family.

Good night, Bart.

Good night.

Brother Bret...

shake hands with Brother Bart.

Evening.

You got a Miss Samantha Crawford staying here?

No, sir. We don't cater to single females unless their folks are with them.

This is a respectable hotel, mister.

You, uh, might try the Red Dog Saloon

across the square, they ain't so particular.

No. She's not here, she's not there.

She'd only stay at the best hotel.

Well, I'll take a room and a tub full of hot water.

That'll be three dollars for the room, six bits for the hot water...

in advance.

All right, but send up some food, coffee, bread and butter...

some potatoes, and a big, thick, juicy steak.

Buffalo or steer meat?

Anything but buffalo.

You can cancel that order.

Well, Gunnerson, ha, ha, fancy running into you.

Here's your man, marshal. Take him away.

Your Honor, it's just a little, general, all-around misunderstanding.

When I first broke in on Mr. Gunnerson, I thought he was a crook, a counterfeiter.

As a matter of fact, Your Honor...

I thought I was performing a service for my country.

Yes, yes, yes.

But you do admit to Mr. Gunnerson's charge...

of armed entry, robbery and assault in the hotel in Pierre?

Yes, Your Honor.

But when I explained to Mr. Gunnerson, he understood.

The fact remains he has twice robbed and twice assaulted...

an operative of the United States Secret Service...

Well, he's not denying that.

So there's nothing to do but to remove him for trial...

to the federal court in Council Bluffs.

The prisoner will step down and face the court.

Order.

Order in the court.

Order. Order in the court.

Young lady, what's the meaning of this intrusion?

Well, Your Honor, I wish to testify on behalf of the prisoner.

Well.

Well, and what is your name, little lady?

Samantha Crawford.

Well.

Well, Ms. Crawford...

from what I've been told by Mr. Gunnerson...

um, I'm mighty interested to hear your story.

If you'll, uh, take a chair in the witness stand...

the clerk can swear you in.

You're so kind, judge.

You're a southern gentleman, aren't you?

Yes. Atlanta, ma'am.

- And you? - Savannah, judge.

Swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but?

I do indeed.

Your Honor, this is the young woman who stole the plates.

Hold your tongue, sir.

The court will do the questioning here.

And now, my dear, you understand that this not a trial.

It's just a preliminary hearing.

So you just feel free to tell the story in your own way.

Thank you, judge.

Well, I admit Mr. Maverick is a little mischievous.

But he certainly isn't guilty of any old crime.

I did talk him into helping me steal the engraving plates from Mr. Gunnerson.

And when and Mr. Gunnerson found me on that boat...

well, he just had two thoughts in his pretty little old head.

One was to make me give the plates back to Mr. Gunnerson...

the other was to take half the reward.

So when I jumped overboard, he just naturally followed.

Oh, naturally, ha, ha.

Any man would have done the same.

- Ha-ha-ha. - Thank you, judge.

Well, he did catch up with me, and he made me give him back the plates...

but I got them back again.

Your Honor, she admits robbing a member of the U.S. Secret Service.

Furthermore...

I'm sorry.

My dear, you had no business doing that, little lady...

that, I must tell you, is a criminal offense.

Fiddle-dee-dee, how did I know he was a member of the Secret Service?

Why, I thought he was a crook.

Tell me, son...

would this little lady have any way of knowing that you weren't a crook?

Well, no.

Uh, I was posing as a member of the counterfeit gang.

Well, then you can't very well blame her for thinking you were one, can you?

Well, no.

I knew he had those plates. I'd been following him for weeks.

Sit down, Gunnerson.

I did need that reward money...

and I did mean to turn the plates over to the right people.

Of course, you did, my dear.

It was an honest mistake.

She couldn't make an honest mistake.

Silent, sir.

One more outburst from you, I'll find you in contempt of court, sir.

Thank you, my dear. You may step down now, ha, ha.

Are you letting her walk out of here with the plates?

Well, I think you better turn the plates over to Mr. Gunnerson.

Your Honor, I'm afraid I lost the plates in the Elkhorn River.

My horse threw me. I almost drowned.

Hey, now, now. No, my dear, there's no need to cry.

None at all.

The engraving plates are at the bottom of the river...

so that puts an end to counterfeit, hmm?

And more than that, it saves the government $10,000 in reward money.

You are a very brave and forthright little lady, Ms. Crawford.

And it's been an honor to make your acquaintance.

Thank you, judge.

You're a real gentleman.

Yes, Atlanta, ma'am.

Mr. Maverick...

it's the opinion of this court, considering the lack of evidence...

that no United States attorney could make these charges stand.

So I'm dismissing.

- Uh, you are free to go, sir. - Thank you, Your Honor.

Well, don't give up yet, Gunnerson.

You may still get that desk job.

You think she's still got the plates?

I don't know.

But if I was a gambling man, and I am, I'd call her bluff.

Oh, Samantha.

I'm sorry I wasn't here when you called yesterday afternoon.

- I arrived only last night. - Heh.

Mr. Palmer, you didn't tell me that Mr. Gunnerson was a Secret Service agent.

I didn't want to alarm you.

- Did you get the plates? - Do you have the 15,000?

Ah, first, the plates.

Of course, excuse me.

If you don't mind, Mr. Palmer, I'm in a hurry.

Mr. Gunnerson's in town and looking for me.

I'm aware of that.

But first, I like to see what I'm buying.

It's an old habit of mine.

Samantha.

It's your own fault for hiring me under false pretenses.

I hired you because nobody in the world is more successfully dishonest than you.

But trying to palm off blank plates on me...

that isn't very clever.

The plates, Samantha.

The real ones.

I'm turning the real plates in for the reward.

Then what was the purpose of this?

Mr. Palmer, you promised me $15,000 to do a job.

You lied to me. But I earned that money.

This was my way of collecting it.

- Search her, George. - I wouldn't try that, George.

I'll take that 15,000, Mr. Palmer.

Drop it, Samantha.

- I can explain everything. - Sure you can.

Well, well, well, if it isn't my old friend, Bogus Benson.

Why, we thought you'd escaped to South America, ha, ha.

This'll give me that desk job, Maverick, thanks.

What happened, Sam, thieves fall out?

Of course not. This man promised to pay me 15,000 to recover the plates.

Incredible as it may seem, she's telling the truth.

I told her I knew how to boost that reward to 50,000.

And was willing to gamble 15,000 on her efforts.

Now, Sam, surely you couldn't still think he was after the reward...

- when you brought the plates here. - No.

I came to collect what he owes me for my trouble.

I'd have done it if you hadn't butted in.

Ha, ha, that's a likely story.

All right. The plates are right here. Have a look.

Keep them covered, Gunnerson. She's gone again.

Well, now, I...

Oh.

I'm so tired of getting wet.

I'm so tired of chasing after those plates, Sam.

Sure you won't change your mind, come to St. Louis with me?

St. Louis has troubles enough without the both of us.

What are you gonna do with all that reward money?

Oh, um...

Invest it.

Small game of whist here, maybe some cribbage there.

All aboard.

Goodbye, Samantha.

Goodbye, darling.

Don't forget me.

Samantha, how could you?

Bye, darling.

Oh, say hello to Brother Bret for me.

He'll remember me too.