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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,613 --> 00:00:09,682 -* wistful music -[crying] 2 00:00:09,782 --> 00:00:10,783 [Liliana] He wanted to be 3 00:00:10,883 --> 00:00:12,118 buried here. 4 00:00:12,185 --> 00:00:13,519 There's a spot, marked on a map. 5 00:00:13,652 --> 00:00:14,720 I know the spot. 6 00:00:15,854 --> 00:00:17,556 I can't remember his face. 7 00:00:18,291 --> 00:00:20,093 If I were you, I wouldn't listen. 8 00:00:20,193 --> 00:00:21,194 Play it. 9 00:00:21,294 --> 00:00:22,328 [metal straining, clattering] 10 00:00:22,428 --> 00:00:23,862 [Preston] Jesus! Fuck, Paul! 11 00:00:23,996 --> 00:00:25,764 -[Paul] Just hold on. -[Preston] Christ. 12 00:00:26,665 --> 00:00:27,800 Stacy! 13 00:00:27,900 --> 00:00:29,368 Oh, my God. 14 00:00:29,468 --> 00:00:31,737 I heard him die. 15 00:00:32,405 --> 00:00:34,073 [Van] As much as I like sitting here, 16 00:00:34,173 --> 00:00:35,908 it hurts more than you'll ever know. 17 00:00:36,008 --> 00:00:37,910 So, if you're wondering how I feel about you, 18 00:00:38,043 --> 00:00:39,645 I feel enough to sit here and take it. 19 00:00:39,712 --> 00:00:40,913 [Stacy] Abby, 20 00:00:41,046 --> 00:00:42,781 if I were you, I would 21 00:00:42,881 --> 00:00:44,950 set my hooks pretty deep in that one. 22 00:00:45,050 --> 00:00:47,253 They're not making any more men like him. 23 00:00:48,721 --> 00:00:50,223 [laughing] 24 00:00:52,591 --> 00:00:56,562 I wonder if you know how happy this would make him. 25 00:00:57,596 --> 00:00:59,398 It would fill his heart. 26 00:00:59,532 --> 00:01:02,335 Tomorrow, we bury them. 27 00:01:05,871 --> 00:01:09,074 * slow, haunting music * 28 00:01:33,865 --> 00:01:36,001 * music swells * 29 00:01:55,888 --> 00:01:58,023 *** 30 00:02:32,057 --> 00:02:34,159 [Macy] That's an elk track right there. 31 00:02:34,260 --> 00:02:35,294 [Stacy] Oh. 32 00:02:35,394 --> 00:02:37,996 Oh. Look, there's another one. 33 00:02:38,096 --> 00:02:40,533 No, that's moose. 34 00:02:41,334 --> 00:02:42,701 How can you tell the difference? 35 00:02:42,801 --> 00:02:44,002 [sighs] 36 00:02:44,102 --> 00:02:46,839 If you spend enough time tracking, you just know. 37 00:02:46,971 --> 00:02:48,407 Ah. 38 00:02:50,608 --> 00:02:54,747 So, do you have any questions about today? 39 00:02:55,648 --> 00:02:56,615 Like what? 40 00:02:56,715 --> 00:02:57,816 I don't know. 41 00:02:57,916 --> 00:02:59,017 Asking you. 42 00:02:59,117 --> 00:03:01,754 Well, you're gonna bury 'em. 43 00:03:01,854 --> 00:03:03,622 We are, mm-hmm. 44 00:03:03,689 --> 00:03:05,758 Then what happens? 45 00:03:05,858 --> 00:03:07,560 Uh, then 46 00:03:07,660 --> 00:03:10,095 they return to the land. 47 00:03:11,330 --> 00:03:13,499 And their bodies become... 48 00:03:13,599 --> 00:03:15,200 a part of it, 49 00:03:15,301 --> 00:03:18,337 um, and their souls, too, 50 00:03:18,404 --> 00:03:19,238 I guess. 51 00:03:19,372 --> 00:03:21,206 They don't go to heaven? 52 00:03:22,007 --> 00:03:24,610 I think this is their heaven. 53 00:03:25,878 --> 00:03:27,713 Heaven is... 54 00:03:28,881 --> 00:03:30,483 Oh, how do I explain this? 55 00:03:30,549 --> 00:03:31,517 -Um... -Our teacher says 56 00:03:31,617 --> 00:03:33,151 there is no heaven. 57 00:03:33,218 --> 00:03:34,987 You know, I don't know if you've already figured this out, 58 00:03:35,087 --> 00:03:37,221 but do not believe everything your teacher says. 59 00:03:38,056 --> 00:03:39,492 Heaven is 60 00:03:39,592 --> 00:03:43,396 your... perfect place. 61 00:03:43,496 --> 00:03:45,364 For some, it's 62 00:03:45,431 --> 00:03:48,166 ice cream oceans and marshmallow mountains. 63 00:03:48,233 --> 00:03:50,235 -[chuckles softly] -And... 64 00:03:50,336 --> 00:03:53,839 others, it's these mountains. 65 00:03:54,707 --> 00:03:56,141 Does that make sense? 66 00:03:57,242 --> 00:03:59,478 And Grandpa's heaven is here. 67 00:04:00,746 --> 00:04:02,548 I think so. 68 00:04:02,615 --> 00:04:06,452 But if you think he's here, why is everyone so sad he's gone? 69 00:04:06,552 --> 00:04:09,187 Well, his heaven isn't mine, 70 00:04:09,288 --> 00:04:10,856 and... 71 00:04:12,090 --> 00:04:13,426 ...you know, I can't see him 72 00:04:13,526 --> 00:04:16,928 and I can't talk to him and can't hug him, 73 00:04:17,029 --> 00:04:20,433 and he can't hug me, and I... I miss that. 74 00:04:20,533 --> 00:04:22,234 Yeah. 75 00:04:22,301 --> 00:04:23,936 I miss it, too. 76 00:04:24,770 --> 00:04:27,205 But that's why we have memories. 77 00:04:27,272 --> 00:04:29,608 We can revisit all those times 78 00:04:29,742 --> 00:04:31,677 that we did have. 79 00:04:31,777 --> 00:04:34,246 All the talks, all the laughs, 80 00:04:34,347 --> 00:04:36,148 all the hugs, and... 81 00:04:36,248 --> 00:04:39,318 You know, it's like a movie. We can... 82 00:04:40,285 --> 00:04:43,221 We can play it over and over 83 00:04:43,322 --> 00:04:46,291 as many times as we want, 84 00:04:46,392 --> 00:04:48,293 you know, in our minds. 85 00:04:48,394 --> 00:04:49,628 You know what I mean? 86 00:04:49,728 --> 00:04:50,863 I do. 87 00:04:51,797 --> 00:04:55,334 Not the same, though, as a real hug. 88 00:04:55,434 --> 00:04:58,404 No, it's not the same. 89 00:05:00,573 --> 00:05:02,841 * sentimental music * 90 00:05:18,857 --> 00:05:20,359 [Cade] Right here, huh? 91 00:05:21,193 --> 00:05:22,861 [Van] She marked it on a map. 92 00:05:22,961 --> 00:05:24,162 [Cade] All right. 93 00:05:24,296 --> 00:05:26,765 Well, we ain't getting a backhoe down here. 94 00:05:26,832 --> 00:05:30,035 Might be able to get a tractor up from the river, but... 95 00:05:30,836 --> 00:05:32,337 ...not sure what good that'll do us. 96 00:05:32,438 --> 00:05:35,841 No, these holes are getting dug the old Irish way. 97 00:05:35,941 --> 00:05:38,176 Yep. 98 00:05:38,276 --> 00:05:40,345 How the hell we gonna get the caskets here? 99 00:05:40,446 --> 00:05:43,048 Swensons still feed off a wagon, don't they? 100 00:05:43,181 --> 00:05:44,717 That's a good idea. 101 00:05:45,818 --> 00:05:47,553 You want to call or run for shovels? 102 00:05:47,686 --> 00:05:49,955 Ah, you call, I'll run. 103 00:05:50,055 --> 00:05:52,525 [Van] My gelding's just gonna follow you. 104 00:05:53,291 --> 00:05:55,093 Yank off that bridle. 105 00:05:55,193 --> 00:05:56,094 Yeah. 106 00:05:56,194 --> 00:05:58,397 * gentle music * 107 00:06:16,148 --> 00:06:17,883 [Abigail] I am aware. 108 00:06:17,983 --> 00:06:20,218 Yes, I am aware. 109 00:06:20,352 --> 00:06:22,120 We have had a death in the family. 110 00:06:22,220 --> 00:06:24,457 I'm pretty sure the world of girls' volleyball 111 00:06:24,557 --> 00:06:26,559 will survive the week without her. 112 00:06:27,426 --> 00:06:28,961 Yes, you are correct. 113 00:06:29,061 --> 00:06:30,996 I am not factoring how this affects anyone else 114 00:06:31,096 --> 00:06:32,731 even a little. 115 00:06:32,831 --> 00:06:34,467 Fucking school. 116 00:06:35,468 --> 00:06:37,770 Is this gonna be okay? 117 00:06:37,870 --> 00:06:40,405 It's gonna have to do, honey, it's all you got. 118 00:06:41,306 --> 00:06:42,941 Hey. 119 00:06:45,377 --> 00:06:46,612 It's just us. 120 00:06:46,712 --> 00:06:49,181 Okay? There's nobody to be offended. 121 00:06:49,247 --> 00:06:50,949 What did school say? 122 00:06:51,083 --> 00:06:53,285 You're missing a volleyball tournament. 123 00:06:53,385 --> 00:06:55,253 It's okay. 124 00:06:55,353 --> 00:06:56,421 -It's okay. -[sobbing] 125 00:06:56,555 --> 00:06:58,491 Hey. 126 00:07:02,060 --> 00:07:03,829 It's okay. 127 00:07:04,697 --> 00:07:07,365 [crying] 128 00:07:19,044 --> 00:07:20,579 -Hey. -Hey. 129 00:07:27,986 --> 00:07:29,254 Where'd you find cream? 130 00:07:29,321 --> 00:07:32,124 Same shopping center where I found the dress. 131 00:07:32,925 --> 00:07:35,027 I got to say, Bozeman impressed me. 132 00:07:35,127 --> 00:07:38,531 I wasn't expecting to find Donna Karan in the mountains. 133 00:07:38,631 --> 00:07:40,132 -[chuckles] -Found a little something 134 00:07:40,232 --> 00:07:41,967 -for you, too. -Yeah, 135 00:07:42,100 --> 00:07:43,936 Preston would prefer me in jeans. 136 00:07:44,036 --> 00:07:46,672 I think he would find a certain 137 00:07:46,805 --> 00:07:48,641 victory in that. 138 00:07:48,774 --> 00:07:49,975 He deserves a little black dress, 139 00:07:50,108 --> 00:07:51,844 and that's exactly what I got you. 140 00:07:51,977 --> 00:07:54,446 Did the boys say when they would be ready? 141 00:07:54,513 --> 00:07:56,348 They said to walk over at noon. 142 00:07:56,481 --> 00:07:58,016 How are they gonna get them out there? 143 00:07:58,116 --> 00:08:01,153 I didn't ask, and they didn't say. 144 00:08:01,253 --> 00:08:03,055 They just said it was handled. 145 00:08:05,023 --> 00:08:06,559 About two hours. 146 00:08:07,325 --> 00:08:09,327 Preston wrote a chapter on... 147 00:08:09,427 --> 00:08:12,831 telling time from the sun's position. 148 00:08:12,931 --> 00:08:16,769 It's... alarmingly accurate. 149 00:08:17,903 --> 00:08:20,072 The girls asked me to arrange a plane. 150 00:08:22,107 --> 00:08:23,508 When? 151 00:08:23,609 --> 00:08:24,843 Tonight. 152 00:08:24,977 --> 00:08:26,511 Oh... 153 00:08:26,612 --> 00:08:27,680 Okay. 154 00:08:27,780 --> 00:08:29,181 They need closure, honey. 155 00:08:29,281 --> 00:08:31,116 They won't get it here. 156 00:08:31,183 --> 00:08:34,119 They have lives, and they need to go live them. 157 00:08:34,218 --> 00:08:37,155 I would very much like to plan a memorial service. 158 00:08:37,222 --> 00:08:39,424 He has a lot of friends that deserve a way to say goodbye. 159 00:08:39,524 --> 00:08:40,626 Does he? 160 00:08:40,693 --> 00:08:43,227 He does. And you know that. 161 00:08:43,328 --> 00:08:45,664 We could do it at the Explorers Club. 162 00:08:45,731 --> 00:08:47,733 Okay, just... 163 00:08:47,833 --> 00:08:49,501 How about the apartment? 164 00:08:49,602 --> 00:08:53,238 Have Carbone cater. 165 00:08:53,371 --> 00:08:54,707 He loved that place. 166 00:08:54,807 --> 00:08:56,842 I already called. 167 00:08:56,942 --> 00:08:58,543 You flying back, too? 168 00:09:01,947 --> 00:09:03,548 I have a very worried husband. 169 00:09:03,649 --> 00:09:06,518 He's convinced some distant cousin of the Unabomber 170 00:09:06,619 --> 00:09:07,886 is going to abduct me 171 00:09:07,986 --> 00:09:10,723 and hold me in his basement for ransom. 172 00:09:10,856 --> 00:09:12,891 Depending on the cousin, I'm not completely opposed. 173 00:09:12,991 --> 00:09:14,559 -Oh, stop. -Of course, that's my 174 00:09:14,660 --> 00:09:17,195 warped romance novel version of abduction. 175 00:09:17,295 --> 00:09:19,397 I doubt that's how it would play out, Lili. 176 00:09:19,497 --> 00:09:22,000 That is how it'd play out in my mind after two Percocets, 177 00:09:22,067 --> 00:09:23,535 -so... -[laughs] 178 00:09:23,636 --> 00:09:24,770 You think I'm joking? 179 00:09:24,903 --> 00:09:26,471 -No. -No? 180 00:09:30,909 --> 00:09:32,778 I love you. 181 00:09:37,449 --> 00:09:38,617 There is nowhere I would rather be 182 00:09:38,751 --> 00:09:40,686 than with you when you need me. 183 00:09:40,753 --> 00:09:42,154 I know. 184 00:09:45,824 --> 00:09:47,092 I have a little bottle of Kahlรบa 185 00:09:47,192 --> 00:09:48,961 if you would like some lead in that coffee. 186 00:09:49,061 --> 00:09:52,064 Oh. Well, now you're talking. 187 00:09:56,935 --> 00:09:59,104 [door opens] 188 00:10:00,072 --> 00:10:02,174 [bottle clinks] 189 00:10:04,442 --> 00:10:07,279 * contemplative music * 190 00:10:13,051 --> 00:10:15,888 Little more, more. 191 00:10:15,988 --> 00:10:17,690 -Okay. -[chuckles] 192 00:10:17,790 --> 00:10:19,658 Okay. 193 00:10:47,920 --> 00:10:50,122 *** 194 00:11:03,969 --> 00:11:06,538 Of course you packed the perfect dress. 195 00:11:10,408 --> 00:11:11,810 [door opens] 196 00:11:13,278 --> 00:11:16,048 Is there some little black dress tree 197 00:11:16,148 --> 00:11:19,084 by the river that I am unaware of? 198 00:11:20,252 --> 00:11:21,686 Okay, girls. 199 00:11:24,222 --> 00:11:25,423 And Russell. 200 00:11:35,533 --> 00:11:37,770 * mournful music * 201 00:12:06,731 --> 00:12:09,802 -Where are they? -Uh, coming. 202 00:12:09,902 --> 00:12:11,569 Okay. 203 00:12:12,570 --> 00:12:13,505 I'm sorry. 204 00:12:13,571 --> 00:12:15,440 Thank you. 205 00:12:15,540 --> 00:12:16,975 Sorry for your loss. 206 00:12:17,742 --> 00:12:20,612 -Sorry for the snot. -No, it's fine. 207 00:12:26,351 --> 00:12:28,987 I'm sorrier than you'll ever know. 208 00:12:29,922 --> 00:12:30,856 Thank you. 209 00:12:30,956 --> 00:12:33,125 [sniffling] 210 00:12:44,870 --> 00:12:47,005 [crying] 211 00:13:10,462 --> 00:13:12,464 [Swenson] Okay, boys. 212 00:13:26,912 --> 00:13:28,313 Watch your hand. 213 00:13:54,439 --> 00:13:56,408 *** 214 00:14:07,285 --> 00:14:08,786 [grunting softly] 215 00:14:21,133 --> 00:14:22,367 Mrs. Clyburn, 216 00:14:22,467 --> 00:14:24,903 -I'm very sorry for your loss. -Thank you. 217 00:14:27,105 --> 00:14:28,573 Is a preacher coming? 218 00:14:32,077 --> 00:14:33,979 I forgot. I-I didn't-- I-- 219 00:14:34,079 --> 00:14:36,081 Uh... 220 00:14:36,214 --> 00:14:38,050 this one'll be sans preacher. 221 00:14:38,183 --> 00:14:39,251 What's that mean? 222 00:14:39,384 --> 00:14:42,287 -Means we don't have one. -Oh. 223 00:14:42,387 --> 00:14:46,091 Do you have someone to govern the proceedings? 224 00:14:46,191 --> 00:14:47,559 [Stacy] We, um... 225 00:14:49,061 --> 00:14:50,762 This is my first funeral here, 226 00:14:50,862 --> 00:14:54,099 so we're sort of winging it. 227 00:14:54,232 --> 00:14:57,335 Well, this is far from my first rodeo. 228 00:14:57,435 --> 00:15:00,372 Um, do you mind if I say something first 229 00:15:00,438 --> 00:15:02,374 and then give you all a chance to speak? 230 00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:06,278 I don't think my group has many speeches in them. 231 00:15:08,646 --> 00:15:10,248 Do you mind a prayer? 232 00:15:10,348 --> 00:15:12,550 I do not. 233 00:15:17,289 --> 00:15:19,324 [Swenson clears throat] 234 00:15:22,094 --> 00:15:25,197 Lord, we stand before You with heavy hearts. 235 00:15:25,263 --> 00:15:28,800 With the glory of love comes the pain of loss, 236 00:15:28,900 --> 00:15:31,403 and we look to You for comfort. 237 00:15:31,469 --> 00:15:33,038 Remind us that 238 00:15:33,105 --> 00:15:35,307 it is a selfish pain 239 00:15:35,407 --> 00:15:37,942 because You have promised a place called Heaven 240 00:15:38,043 --> 00:15:41,779 where our departed bask in the glow of Your grace. 241 00:15:41,913 --> 00:15:44,216 They are no longer men. 242 00:15:44,316 --> 00:15:45,984 They are angels 243 00:15:46,118 --> 00:15:48,086 who guide us through darkness, 244 00:15:48,153 --> 00:15:51,123 lift us when we are weak 245 00:15:51,223 --> 00:15:53,491 and nourish our souls and spirits. 246 00:15:54,326 --> 00:15:56,128 Our pain is a selfish pain 247 00:15:56,228 --> 00:15:59,131 because we do not know this place, Heaven. 248 00:15:59,231 --> 00:16:01,633 We lean on our faith 249 00:16:01,766 --> 00:16:03,301 that it exists, 250 00:16:03,401 --> 00:16:05,637 and on Your mercy 251 00:16:05,737 --> 00:16:07,472 that it holds a place for us 252 00:16:07,605 --> 00:16:11,309 where we may sit in Your light beside our loved ones 253 00:16:11,443 --> 00:16:15,213 and know only joy forever. 254 00:16:17,315 --> 00:16:19,017 Amen. 255 00:16:19,884 --> 00:16:22,287 Uh, if anyone would like a word. 256 00:16:23,688 --> 00:16:24,956 Stacy. 257 00:16:25,023 --> 00:16:27,725 It's not the first time you've given that speech. 258 00:16:28,626 --> 00:16:30,328 No, ma'am. 259 00:16:30,428 --> 00:16:32,064 [Stacy] It's a good one. 260 00:16:33,798 --> 00:16:35,700 You care to say something? 261 00:16:37,302 --> 00:16:41,039 I have plenty to say, but I won't be saying it today. 262 00:16:49,847 --> 00:16:51,483 Guess that's it, then. 263 00:16:53,285 --> 00:16:54,386 Um... 264 00:16:54,486 --> 00:16:56,121 [sniffles] 265 00:16:56,221 --> 00:16:57,855 So, what happens now? 266 00:16:58,656 --> 00:17:00,158 We'll take care of everything. 267 00:17:00,225 --> 00:17:01,826 [mouths] 268 00:17:04,462 --> 00:17:06,631 Wait, that's it? That's-that's it? 269 00:17:06,731 --> 00:17:08,600 If you have something to say, then say it, Paige. 270 00:17:08,699 --> 00:17:10,368 I-I don't know what to say. 271 00:17:10,468 --> 00:17:12,304 Wh-What are you supposed to say? 272 00:17:12,403 --> 00:17:14,238 I think that's her point. 273 00:17:18,410 --> 00:17:19,576 Which one's Paul? 274 00:17:29,521 --> 00:17:32,157 Goddamn you for taking him from us. 275 00:17:45,403 --> 00:17:47,239 I love you. 276 00:18:00,852 --> 00:18:04,189 [Swenson] Everyone deals with it different, don't they, boys? 277 00:18:05,357 --> 00:18:08,293 [Van] I don't think they're dealing with it at all. 278 00:18:08,426 --> 00:18:10,528 Not yet, anyway. 279 00:18:10,595 --> 00:18:12,330 Who can blame 'em? 280 00:18:17,469 --> 00:18:20,372 * somber music * 281 00:18:24,976 --> 00:18:27,145 [grunting softly] 282 00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:29,947 Thank you. 283 00:18:54,138 --> 00:18:56,941 [indistinct chatter] 284 00:19:11,589 --> 00:19:15,327 Pretty sneaky, trying to have a funeral and not tell anybody. 285 00:19:15,427 --> 00:19:16,794 Oh, I... 286 00:19:16,861 --> 00:19:20,498 I-I didn't know anyone would care. I-- 287 00:19:20,598 --> 00:19:21,933 We let you have the funeral. 288 00:19:21,999 --> 00:19:24,101 We will not be denied our feast. 289 00:19:24,168 --> 00:19:25,670 [chuckles] 290 00:19:26,471 --> 00:19:27,539 [Bill] When they decided 291 00:19:27,672 --> 00:19:28,906 to build these cabins, 292 00:19:29,006 --> 00:19:30,708 they wanted to do it all themselves. 293 00:19:30,808 --> 00:19:32,644 Mill the wood, frame it, 294 00:19:32,710 --> 00:19:34,446 rough in the electric, the whole deal. 295 00:19:34,512 --> 00:19:36,681 Look at the bottom of 'em there. 296 00:19:36,781 --> 00:19:38,783 They're sitting on railroad ties, 297 00:19:38,850 --> 00:19:40,051 and I could not figure out 298 00:19:40,184 --> 00:19:42,119 what in the hell purpose that would serve. 299 00:19:42,186 --> 00:19:44,856 And I told 'em they're gonna be colder than the devil in winter, 300 00:19:44,989 --> 00:19:47,559 and every skunk and raccoon and God knows what else 301 00:19:47,659 --> 00:19:49,494 is gonna set up shop underneath them. 302 00:19:49,594 --> 00:19:52,196 Well, Preston just looked at me and nodded. 303 00:19:52,297 --> 00:19:53,498 Didn't say a word. 304 00:19:53,565 --> 00:19:55,633 About six months later, 305 00:19:55,733 --> 00:19:57,469 tax assessor comes by my place and says, 306 00:19:57,569 --> 00:20:00,171 "Have you seen these cabins they built next door?" 307 00:20:00,238 --> 00:20:01,539 I said I had. 308 00:20:01,639 --> 00:20:04,041 And he asked me if I'd ever seen 'em move. 309 00:20:04,175 --> 00:20:06,711 I said, "Move? What do-what do you mean, move?" 310 00:20:06,844 --> 00:20:10,582 Tax assessor says, when he tried to put a value on 'em, 311 00:20:10,682 --> 00:20:13,117 your husband said they was mobile homes. 312 00:20:13,217 --> 00:20:14,986 -[laughing] -You pick 'em up with a forklift 313 00:20:15,086 --> 00:20:16,288 and move 'em. 314 00:20:16,388 --> 00:20:18,656 And asked me if I'd ever seen 'em be mobile. 315 00:20:18,723 --> 00:20:20,091 Well, I told him, 316 00:20:20,224 --> 00:20:22,159 "Well, yeah, they haul 'em all over the place." 317 00:20:23,027 --> 00:20:25,430 And if you look at the back of that outhouse, 318 00:20:25,530 --> 00:20:28,232 your husband nailed tires from a shopping cart 319 00:20:28,333 --> 00:20:30,535 and said that son of a bitch was mobile, too. 320 00:20:30,602 --> 00:20:32,737 [Bill laughs] 321 00:20:32,837 --> 00:20:34,772 He did not want to pay any taxes. 322 00:20:34,872 --> 00:20:36,207 I wondered what those were for. 323 00:20:36,274 --> 00:20:39,243 Preston always had issues with authority. 324 00:20:39,377 --> 00:20:41,913 Wheels on the outhouse. Never seen anything like it. 325 00:20:42,013 --> 00:20:44,115 -No. -[Bill chuckling] 326 00:20:44,215 --> 00:20:47,785 Indian tacos. Good stuff. 327 00:20:47,885 --> 00:20:49,186 Want some? 328 00:20:49,253 --> 00:20:51,289 Mm, how about some of those cookies? 329 00:20:51,423 --> 00:20:53,925 Ah. Good choice. 330 00:20:54,025 --> 00:20:56,894 I was thinking, like, three. 331 00:20:57,762 --> 00:20:59,797 What's your mom gonna say about that? 332 00:20:59,931 --> 00:21:01,299 My mom's not gonna say anything 333 00:21:01,433 --> 00:21:02,934 'cause she's not gonna see me eat 'em. 334 00:21:03,034 --> 00:21:04,702 Let's keep this between us. 335 00:21:04,769 --> 00:21:06,037 [chuckles] 336 00:21:06,103 --> 00:21:07,872 I think that's a good idea. 337 00:21:07,972 --> 00:21:10,141 * gentle music * 338 00:21:19,817 --> 00:21:21,819 -[Abigail] Thank you for today. -[Van] Mm. 339 00:21:21,919 --> 00:21:23,788 [Abigail] It means more than you know. 340 00:21:23,888 --> 00:21:26,858 Someone had to do it for me. I know what it means. 341 00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:31,095 I'm sorry it had to be done. 342 00:21:31,896 --> 00:21:33,197 We're flying out tonight. 343 00:21:33,297 --> 00:21:34,632 Girls have missed enough school, 344 00:21:34,732 --> 00:21:36,133 and I have exhausted my wardrobe. 345 00:21:36,233 --> 00:21:38,403 -Mm. -But... 346 00:21:41,339 --> 00:21:42,974 ...I'd like to come back. 347 00:21:43,074 --> 00:21:44,742 Or... 348 00:21:44,809 --> 00:21:46,944 dare I invite you to New York? 349 00:21:47,044 --> 00:21:48,646 [chuckles] Well, the only way 350 00:21:48,780 --> 00:21:51,416 you get me to New York is if it seceded from the Union 351 00:21:51,483 --> 00:21:53,250 and I was drafted into the army to take it back. 352 00:21:53,351 --> 00:21:55,152 Okay, you got to go a little easier 353 00:21:55,252 --> 00:21:57,021 -on my city, buddy. -[chuckles softly] I'm-I'm... 354 00:21:57,154 --> 00:21:58,122 I'm not knocking it. 355 00:21:58,189 --> 00:21:59,591 I'm just not going there. 356 00:21:59,691 --> 00:22:01,859 Fair enough. 357 00:22:01,993 --> 00:22:03,595 Then I'll come visit. 358 00:22:04,529 --> 00:22:05,597 Sure. 359 00:22:05,663 --> 00:22:08,065 I mean it. 360 00:22:09,434 --> 00:22:11,068 Okay. 361 00:22:12,136 --> 00:22:13,805 I mean it. 362 00:22:16,608 --> 00:22:18,743 Hmm. 363 00:22:20,177 --> 00:22:23,381 I'm a sheriff's deputy who makes $52,000 a year. 364 00:22:23,481 --> 00:22:26,884 I have $12,000 in the bank, and I'm about to spend six of it 365 00:22:27,018 --> 00:22:28,520 on a pretty average rope horse. 366 00:22:28,620 --> 00:22:30,655 Three nights a week, I'm gonna load him in a trailer 367 00:22:30,755 --> 00:22:32,223 and drag him all over Montana 368 00:22:32,356 --> 00:22:33,858 trying to win back what I spent on him. 369 00:22:33,958 --> 00:22:36,027 In October, I'm gonna take my boys in the mountains 370 00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:38,195 for a month and fill our freezer with elk. 371 00:22:38,329 --> 00:22:40,331 I ain't never laying on no beach. 372 00:22:40,398 --> 00:22:42,867 I'm never going to Europe, 373 00:22:42,967 --> 00:22:45,470 or San Francisco or any city bigger than Billings. 374 00:22:45,570 --> 00:22:47,905 Ever. 375 00:22:48,039 --> 00:22:49,874 What part of that sounds good to you? 376 00:22:49,974 --> 00:22:52,209 -None of it. -Now, walk me through your life. 377 00:22:52,309 --> 00:22:53,377 What won't you change? 378 00:22:53,511 --> 00:22:54,712 I don't have those kind of obstacles. 379 00:22:54,812 --> 00:22:56,948 I-- Just walk me through it. 380 00:23:00,017 --> 00:23:02,554 Macy has gymnastics every morning. 381 00:23:03,588 --> 00:23:06,223 From there, I go to Pilates. From Pilates, 382 00:23:06,323 --> 00:23:08,526 I go to my therapist. From my therapist, I go to coffee 383 00:23:08,626 --> 00:23:10,428 with my girlfriends to talk about all the bullshit advice 384 00:23:10,528 --> 00:23:12,229 my therapist gave me. 385 00:23:12,329 --> 00:23:15,266 Then I pick up Macy and I get Bridgett and we go to ballet. 386 00:23:15,366 --> 00:23:16,768 We have recitals every Friday night. 387 00:23:16,901 --> 00:23:18,603 Saturday morning, we have competitions. 388 00:23:18,703 --> 00:23:20,071 -Mm. -I take the girls to St. Barts 389 00:23:20,171 --> 00:23:22,006 for Christmas, Italy for the month of July, 390 00:23:22,106 --> 00:23:24,275 which you would love, 391 00:23:24,375 --> 00:23:26,578 I will point out. 392 00:23:30,515 --> 00:23:32,183 Who feeds the horses? 393 00:23:33,017 --> 00:23:34,686 Isn't there a service for that? 394 00:23:34,786 --> 00:23:36,888 You have to do it every day? 395 00:23:37,755 --> 00:23:39,056 Okay. 396 00:23:39,156 --> 00:23:40,725 Okay, there is no future in this, 397 00:23:40,825 --> 00:23:42,660 but you are tall 398 00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:45,497 and kind and fucking beautiful. 399 00:23:45,630 --> 00:23:47,264 You are tall and kind and beautiful. 400 00:23:47,364 --> 00:23:50,134 Okay. So can we just agree to fuck this up together 401 00:23:50,234 --> 00:23:51,836 and have as much sex 402 00:23:51,936 --> 00:23:53,304 -as possible until... -[laughs] Jesus. 403 00:23:53,437 --> 00:23:55,306 -until we can't? -Yeah, 404 00:23:55,406 --> 00:23:57,208 you city girls do spell it out, don't you? 405 00:23:57,308 --> 00:23:59,176 Yeah, we-we... we get to the point. 406 00:23:59,310 --> 00:24:00,678 -Yup, we do. -I go 407 00:24:00,778 --> 00:24:02,079 from wondering when we're gonna see each other 408 00:24:02,179 --> 00:24:04,516 to wondering when you're gonna leave. I... 409 00:24:04,616 --> 00:24:06,150 [sighs] 410 00:24:06,283 --> 00:24:08,352 I think I'd rather just miss you. 411 00:24:10,021 --> 00:24:12,690 -I'm not gone yet. -You know what I mean. 412 00:24:12,824 --> 00:24:14,892 So is this goodbye? 413 00:24:16,961 --> 00:24:18,395 -[scoffs] -I think it's best. 414 00:24:18,496 --> 00:24:19,997 Oh, wow. 415 00:24:21,833 --> 00:24:24,268 Let me just clarify 416 00:24:24,335 --> 00:24:27,872 that you are breaking up with me at my father's funeral. 417 00:24:28,005 --> 00:24:29,774 We-we aren't together to break up. We-- 418 00:24:29,874 --> 00:24:31,275 No, no, no, we seemed pretty together yesterday when 419 00:24:31,375 --> 00:24:32,777 -you were lying on top of me. -Abby, I-- 420 00:24:32,877 --> 00:24:34,879 Don't fucking "Abby" me now. 421 00:24:34,979 --> 00:24:36,280 You want to miss me? 422 00:24:36,380 --> 00:24:38,282 Is that what you want? 423 00:24:38,349 --> 00:24:39,984 Here's your fucking chance. 424 00:24:40,084 --> 00:24:42,554 * melancholy music * 425 00:24:57,869 --> 00:24:59,537 [door closes] 426 00:25:03,908 --> 00:25:05,543 Oh. 427 00:25:09,647 --> 00:25:11,415 It's time to go home, isn't it? 428 00:25:12,850 --> 00:25:14,952 It's been time, honey. 429 00:25:42,179 --> 00:25:44,882 [paper rustling] 430 00:25:49,253 --> 00:25:52,356 When did your father die, Russell? 431 00:25:53,758 --> 00:25:56,594 Um, it'll be, uh, six years in April. 432 00:25:56,694 --> 00:25:57,962 Where is he buried? 433 00:25:58,062 --> 00:25:59,296 Uh, my mother had him cremated. 434 00:25:59,396 --> 00:26:01,198 Yeah, the plan was 435 00:26:01,265 --> 00:26:03,400 to spread his ashes at our place in Montauk, 436 00:26:03,500 --> 00:26:06,771 but... never did it. 437 00:26:06,904 --> 00:26:08,372 I don't know why. 438 00:26:08,472 --> 00:26:11,943 So, he's sitting in a jar on our mantle, 439 00:26:12,076 --> 00:26:14,979 which is an odd custom. [chuckles] 440 00:26:15,079 --> 00:26:17,381 Putting ashes in a jar 441 00:26:17,448 --> 00:26:19,651 above a fireplace full of ashes. 442 00:26:19,784 --> 00:26:22,486 What do you miss most 443 00:26:22,586 --> 00:26:24,722 about him? 444 00:26:27,424 --> 00:26:30,762 He used to call me every Monday and, uh, tell me a joke. 445 00:26:30,828 --> 00:26:33,030 -Really? -Mm. 446 00:26:33,831 --> 00:26:35,166 You still remember them? 447 00:26:35,266 --> 00:26:36,567 Oh, yeah. [chuckles] 448 00:26:36,668 --> 00:26:37,601 Tell me one. 449 00:26:37,669 --> 00:26:39,070 -Oh, no, no, no. -Come on. 450 00:26:39,170 --> 00:26:40,404 Uh, they, um... 451 00:26:40,471 --> 00:26:42,073 Yeah, my father had a, uh, 452 00:26:42,139 --> 00:26:44,075 rather warped sense of humor. 453 00:26:44,141 --> 00:26:47,578 Yeah, well, at this point, I'm pretty hard to offend. 454 00:26:49,013 --> 00:26:49,947 Mm. 455 00:26:50,014 --> 00:26:51,983 [chuckles softly] 456 00:26:52,083 --> 00:26:53,450 Okay. [inhales sharply] 457 00:26:53,517 --> 00:26:54,986 Um... 458 00:26:55,920 --> 00:26:57,789 Okay. 459 00:26:57,855 --> 00:27:00,391 So there are four nuns driving in a van. 460 00:27:00,491 --> 00:27:02,760 And the van goes off a cliff, and they all die. 461 00:27:02,860 --> 00:27:04,962 -Funny. -No, no, no, that's... 462 00:27:05,029 --> 00:27:07,164 I'm-I'm getting to the story. This is all just the setup. 463 00:27:07,264 --> 00:27:09,166 -Yeah, I got-I got it, yeah. -Okay. 464 00:27:09,266 --> 00:27:11,135 So they're standing at the pearly gates, 465 00:27:11,202 --> 00:27:14,338 and St. Peter looks them over, and he says to the first nun, 466 00:27:14,438 --> 00:27:16,373 "This is your last chance to confess 467 00:27:16,473 --> 00:27:18,710 before you enter the gates of Heaven, 468 00:27:18,810 --> 00:27:21,278 and your conscience must be cleansed before you enter." 469 00:27:21,378 --> 00:27:24,348 So the first nun thinks about it, and she says, 470 00:27:24,481 --> 00:27:25,950 "Well... 471 00:27:26,017 --> 00:27:29,020 I used to sneak peeks at Father Riley in the shower." 472 00:27:29,120 --> 00:27:30,421 -Mm-hmm. -St. Peter says, 473 00:27:30,521 --> 00:27:31,856 "Well, you're a naughty one, sister. 474 00:27:31,989 --> 00:27:33,825 Wash your eyes in this bowl of holy water 475 00:27:33,925 --> 00:27:35,292 and say five Hail Marys." 476 00:27:35,392 --> 00:27:37,829 She does. Sends her off to Heaven. 477 00:27:37,895 --> 00:27:40,631 So he looks at the second nun, asks her the same thing. 478 00:27:40,698 --> 00:27:42,867 She says, "Well, on occasion, 479 00:27:42,967 --> 00:27:46,403 I would stroke Father Riley's member with my hand." 480 00:27:46,537 --> 00:27:49,273 St. Peter just shakes his head, 481 00:27:49,373 --> 00:27:51,408 tells her to wash her hand in the bowl of holy water, 482 00:27:51,542 --> 00:27:52,877 say ten Hail Marys. 483 00:27:52,977 --> 00:27:55,546 So, she does, lets her into Heaven. 484 00:27:55,646 --> 00:27:57,314 Now the third nun steps up, 485 00:27:57,414 --> 00:28:00,084 but the fourth nun grabs her, throws her to the ground 486 00:28:00,217 --> 00:28:01,719 and steps up to the bowl of holy water. 487 00:28:01,853 --> 00:28:04,856 St. Peter says, "What on earth are you doing, Sister?" 488 00:28:04,922 --> 00:28:07,524 And the nun says, "I'm gonna wash my mouth out in this bowl 489 00:28:07,624 --> 00:28:10,494 before that bitch puts her ass in it." [chuckles] 490 00:28:14,398 --> 00:28:16,367 I stand corrected, Russell. 491 00:28:16,467 --> 00:28:18,002 I can still be offended. 492 00:28:18,069 --> 00:28:20,071 That was very poorly chosen. 493 00:28:20,204 --> 00:28:22,006 I'm sorry. It was the first one that came to my mind. 494 00:28:22,073 --> 00:28:23,975 I am so sorry. I... 495 00:28:24,075 --> 00:28:27,244 -It's terrible. -Common denominator 496 00:28:27,344 --> 00:28:29,113 for their problem seems to be Father Riley. 497 00:28:29,213 --> 00:28:31,983 Yeah, he, uh, did get around. 498 00:28:32,083 --> 00:28:33,951 Ah. What's in it? 499 00:28:34,051 --> 00:28:36,620 Vodka soda, easy on the soda. 500 00:28:37,454 --> 00:28:38,522 God bless you. 501 00:28:38,589 --> 00:28:40,191 I'm meeting Stefan at the gym 502 00:28:40,257 --> 00:28:42,426 at 9:00, if you're up for it. 503 00:28:42,526 --> 00:28:43,861 Oh, yeah. 504 00:28:43,928 --> 00:28:46,297 Exercise is exactly what I need. 505 00:28:49,366 --> 00:28:53,304 I see things didn't end well with the cowboy? 506 00:28:54,138 --> 00:28:56,073 Has that look about it. 507 00:28:57,674 --> 00:28:59,476 Paige has been quiet. 508 00:28:59,576 --> 00:29:01,378 [Stacy] I think this is going to be hardest 509 00:29:01,445 --> 00:29:04,515 on her, I'm afraid. 510 00:29:05,282 --> 00:29:07,484 -How so? -When you've dedicated 511 00:29:07,618 --> 00:29:11,555 your entire life to gaining the attention of one person... 512 00:29:12,990 --> 00:29:15,559 ...what is your purpose when that person is gone? 513 00:29:16,327 --> 00:29:17,962 The girls are handling it well, at least. 514 00:29:18,062 --> 00:29:20,832 Yeah, well, they're too young to know the difference. 515 00:29:20,932 --> 00:29:24,101 Just one less present at Christmas. 516 00:29:27,771 --> 00:29:31,275 I know an excellent therapist, Stacy. 517 00:29:31,375 --> 00:29:32,910 You are my therapist. 518 00:29:34,045 --> 00:29:36,047 You're my best friend. 519 00:29:36,147 --> 00:29:37,949 I'm incapable of being impartial. 520 00:29:38,049 --> 00:29:40,351 Speaking to someone who can look at the situation 521 00:29:40,484 --> 00:29:43,654 with clarity and with zero opinion-- 522 00:29:43,754 --> 00:29:45,156 What I need is opinion. 523 00:29:45,256 --> 00:29:48,059 If I want to know what the book on death says, 524 00:29:48,159 --> 00:29:50,127 I'll buy the fucking book. 525 00:29:52,529 --> 00:29:54,765 * thoughtful music * 526 00:30:14,618 --> 00:30:16,854 [keys jingling] 527 00:30:42,279 --> 00:30:44,515 [speaking indistinctly] 528 00:30:57,528 --> 00:30:59,763 [man speaking indistinctly] 529 00:31:21,919 --> 00:31:24,221 [TV narrator speaking indistinctly] 530 00:31:26,190 --> 00:31:28,425 [remote clatters softly] 531 00:31:46,610 --> 00:31:49,413 [Stacy] I ordered a charcuterie board from Eataly. 532 00:31:49,480 --> 00:31:51,315 And the pizzas from Joe's? 533 00:31:51,415 --> 00:31:53,650 One of us is thinking about your cholesterol. 534 00:31:53,784 --> 00:31:55,519 Pizzas are for Paul. It's the one thing 535 00:31:55,619 --> 00:31:57,921 he misses about this city. 536 00:32:00,357 --> 00:32:01,558 Look at you. 537 00:32:02,326 --> 00:32:05,129 -Look at me, what? -[sighs] Men are such children. 538 00:32:05,262 --> 00:32:07,031 Well, this should be interesting. 539 00:32:07,131 --> 00:32:09,733 You are. You have the same look on your face 540 00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:11,335 pulling out those nasty boots 541 00:32:11,435 --> 00:32:13,437 as an 11-year-old pulling out his baseball cleats. 542 00:32:13,537 --> 00:32:16,307 [chuckles] It's the same look you get when Gucci has a sale. 543 00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:18,942 That's different. That's me saving you money. 544 00:32:19,043 --> 00:32:20,277 [chuckles] You know, 545 00:32:20,377 --> 00:32:22,013 this is proof of the genetic distinction 546 00:32:22,146 --> 00:32:24,248 between men and women. 547 00:32:24,315 --> 00:32:26,350 Tell me, oh, love of my life, 548 00:32:26,483 --> 00:32:29,486 all the ways how when you buy something on sale, 549 00:32:29,586 --> 00:32:31,688 it saves me money. 550 00:32:31,788 --> 00:32:33,390 I'm gonna buy the damn thing no matter what. 551 00:32:33,490 --> 00:32:36,660 Waiting for the sale is how much I love you. 552 00:32:36,793 --> 00:32:38,095 [laughs] 553 00:32:38,195 --> 00:32:40,464 -That almost makes sense. -It makes perfect sense 554 00:32:40,531 --> 00:32:43,600 once you accept the inevitability of the purchase. 555 00:32:43,700 --> 00:32:45,102 [laughs] 556 00:32:46,037 --> 00:32:47,504 Okay. 557 00:32:47,604 --> 00:32:49,506 Why do you do that? 558 00:32:49,606 --> 00:32:51,008 What? 559 00:32:51,108 --> 00:32:53,010 [Stacy] Is your little 560 00:32:53,110 --> 00:32:56,013 mountain mistress the jealous type? 561 00:32:56,880 --> 00:32:58,182 You want to know? 562 00:32:58,282 --> 00:33:01,152 I do want to know. I really want to know. 563 00:33:01,218 --> 00:33:03,720 Because I lost it once. 564 00:33:03,854 --> 00:33:05,322 Fell off in the river. 565 00:33:05,422 --> 00:33:06,757 I spent two days looking for it. 566 00:33:06,857 --> 00:33:08,259 I'm not going through that shit again. 567 00:33:08,359 --> 00:33:09,993 So if I put it right there, 568 00:33:10,094 --> 00:33:11,995 I can't lose it. 569 00:33:12,096 --> 00:33:14,431 Hmm. Panicked, were you? 570 00:33:15,532 --> 00:33:17,401 -Terrified. -Mm. 571 00:33:17,501 --> 00:33:19,136 It's nice to see I still have that effect. 572 00:33:19,203 --> 00:33:22,306 Oh, boy. Do you ever, baby. 573 00:33:27,678 --> 00:33:29,880 * pensive music * 574 00:33:47,731 --> 00:33:49,933 *** 575 00:34:14,157 --> 00:34:16,860 [Stacy] Oh, Madison Avenue. 576 00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:19,463 How did they get the name, do you think? 577 00:34:21,898 --> 00:34:24,268 -I always assumed James Madison. -Oh. 578 00:34:24,367 --> 00:34:25,536 -The president. -Yeah. 579 00:34:25,602 --> 00:34:27,238 Of course. That would make sense. 580 00:34:27,304 --> 00:34:28,805 Yeah. 581 00:34:28,905 --> 00:34:30,173 [sighs] 582 00:34:30,273 --> 00:34:31,708 I suppose they named the Madison River 583 00:34:31,775 --> 00:34:33,443 after him, as well. 584 00:34:34,244 --> 00:34:35,846 Where's the Madison River? 585 00:34:35,945 --> 00:34:37,780 Montana. 586 00:34:39,450 --> 00:34:41,117 Where your husband spent time? 587 00:34:41,952 --> 00:34:43,686 Mm-hmm. 588 00:34:45,956 --> 00:34:48,058 Is that where he died? 589 00:34:48,159 --> 00:34:50,026 No. He died on another river. 590 00:34:50,126 --> 00:34:54,198 Actually, no, he died on a mountain. 591 00:34:55,266 --> 00:34:57,734 No-no river involved at all. 592 00:35:03,707 --> 00:35:06,343 How do you feel when you tell me that? 593 00:35:06,477 --> 00:35:08,011 How do you think I feel? 594 00:35:08,145 --> 00:35:11,482 I don't presume to know. It's why I asked. 595 00:35:11,582 --> 00:35:14,251 Isn't that your job? 596 00:35:14,351 --> 00:35:16,187 To tell me how I feel? 597 00:35:17,254 --> 00:35:19,756 My job is to help you understand how you feel. 598 00:35:19,823 --> 00:35:22,693 -Hmm. -More so, 599 00:35:22,793 --> 00:35:24,728 my job is to help you understand the behaviors 600 00:35:24,828 --> 00:35:26,863 that those feelings elicit. 601 00:35:29,032 --> 00:35:31,202 Hmm. 602 00:35:33,804 --> 00:35:38,074 And how would you describe my present behavior? 603 00:35:38,975 --> 00:35:40,311 Hostile. 604 00:35:40,377 --> 00:35:42,279 [short chuckle] 605 00:35:42,379 --> 00:35:43,647 Hostile? 606 00:35:43,747 --> 00:35:45,216 Mistrusting. 607 00:35:46,149 --> 00:35:48,185 Which I understand. 608 00:35:48,285 --> 00:35:50,221 You don't know me. 609 00:35:51,455 --> 00:35:54,024 And yet, here you are, in theory, 610 00:35:54,124 --> 00:35:56,593 willing to expose 611 00:35:56,693 --> 00:35:58,729 your most personal thoughts 612 00:35:58,829 --> 00:36:00,697 and intimate feelings. 613 00:36:01,532 --> 00:36:04,235 Trust me in my interpretation 614 00:36:04,368 --> 00:36:07,538 of those feelings and behaviors... 615 00:36:09,039 --> 00:36:11,242 ...to guide your decision-making in the future. 616 00:36:11,375 --> 00:36:13,210 My decision-making? What... 617 00:36:13,344 --> 00:36:15,246 what-what decisions are we questioning? 618 00:36:15,346 --> 00:36:17,180 -I'm not questioning any. -No, you are the one 619 00:36:17,281 --> 00:36:19,250 who said it. My husband died. 620 00:36:19,383 --> 00:36:21,885 The love of my life, 621 00:36:21,985 --> 00:36:24,221 the father of my children, 622 00:36:24,321 --> 00:36:27,724 my center, my soul is gone. 623 00:36:29,125 --> 00:36:31,027 If you, by chance, have 624 00:36:31,127 --> 00:36:33,397 happened upon any information 625 00:36:33,497 --> 00:36:36,833 that might assist me in mitigating the desire 626 00:36:36,933 --> 00:36:40,170 to claw my eyes out with a fucking spoon 627 00:36:40,271 --> 00:36:41,672 to get rid of the pain, 628 00:36:41,738 --> 00:36:45,309 I sure would appreciate that. 629 00:36:46,142 --> 00:36:48,211 But I do not need you staring at me 630 00:36:48,312 --> 00:36:50,046 like I'm some bored housewife 631 00:36:50,146 --> 00:36:53,950 trying to justify her affair with her fucking tennis coach. 632 00:36:54,050 --> 00:36:56,420 I know those women, plenty of them. 633 00:36:56,520 --> 00:36:59,623 I am not one of them. 634 00:36:59,756 --> 00:37:01,892 I... 635 00:37:01,992 --> 00:37:03,627 am hurting. 636 00:37:03,727 --> 00:37:07,364 And I would like some help with that. 637 00:37:07,464 --> 00:37:09,199 If you can. 638 00:37:09,300 --> 00:37:11,468 If you can't... 639 00:37:13,169 --> 00:37:14,838 ...then I'll leave early. 640 00:37:15,939 --> 00:37:18,809 And you can keep the fucking change. 641 00:37:24,815 --> 00:37:26,450 You care for a drink? 642 00:37:29,286 --> 00:37:31,087 I would love one. 643 00:37:37,728 --> 00:37:39,896 Don't normally do this. 644 00:37:40,664 --> 00:37:44,501 Spend most of my time convincing my clients not to self-medicate. 645 00:37:46,403 --> 00:37:47,638 Don't mind whiskey? 646 00:37:47,738 --> 00:37:50,774 I don't give a shit what it is. 647 00:38:10,794 --> 00:38:12,963 What you need is this. 648 00:38:13,029 --> 00:38:15,332 A lot of this. 649 00:38:15,466 --> 00:38:16,767 Not this. 650 00:38:16,867 --> 00:38:19,002 A lot of talking. 651 00:38:19,903 --> 00:38:21,338 And yelling and crying. 652 00:38:21,438 --> 00:38:24,375 A lot of it, and often. 653 00:38:25,208 --> 00:38:26,910 And in time... 654 00:38:28,545 --> 00:38:30,814 ...those memories will become fond again. 655 00:38:31,748 --> 00:38:34,150 They won't hurt to recall them. 656 00:38:35,151 --> 00:38:37,187 And you'll... 657 00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:38,789 laugh. 658 00:38:40,857 --> 00:38:43,293 Will you love again? 659 00:38:43,394 --> 00:38:45,028 Maybe. 660 00:38:45,128 --> 00:38:47,998 I don't have any idea if that's something you want. 661 00:38:50,467 --> 00:38:52,035 Will you ever be whole again? 662 00:38:52,168 --> 00:38:55,539 Will you feel like you did before he died? 663 00:38:58,575 --> 00:38:59,976 No. 664 00:39:00,877 --> 00:39:02,546 But you know that. 665 00:39:03,346 --> 00:39:06,883 But you will heal if you let yourself. 666 00:39:07,017 --> 00:39:10,086 You will have as much life to live 667 00:39:10,220 --> 00:39:12,489 as you allow yourself. 668 00:39:16,059 --> 00:39:18,261 Or you'll have none. 669 00:39:20,363 --> 00:39:21,998 You'll have no life. 670 00:39:26,002 --> 00:39:28,238 Does that make sense? 671 00:39:30,373 --> 00:39:31,908 Yeah. 672 00:39:32,776 --> 00:39:34,411 Okay. 673 00:39:38,515 --> 00:39:40,951 Why don't you finish your drink and let me have it? 674 00:39:41,051 --> 00:39:42,553 Seriously. 675 00:39:42,653 --> 00:39:44,955 Come on. Give it your best shot. 676 00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:53,229 You're a terrible therapist, you know that? 677 00:39:53,296 --> 00:39:56,199 Yeah. With that smug fucking sweater. 678 00:39:56,299 --> 00:39:58,068 [chuckles softly] 679 00:39:58,168 --> 00:39:59,770 You really like saying "fuck," don't you? 680 00:39:59,870 --> 00:40:02,005 I know. 681 00:40:02,105 --> 00:40:04,174 I find it quite... 682 00:40:05,709 --> 00:40:07,444 ...liberating, at the moment. 683 00:40:07,544 --> 00:40:09,079 Good. 684 00:40:09,145 --> 00:40:10,380 -Say it again. -[laughs] 685 00:40:10,447 --> 00:40:11,882 Fuck you. 686 00:40:11,982 --> 00:40:15,285 Are we gonna do trust falls next, you fucking quack? 687 00:40:15,418 --> 00:40:17,320 [laughs] 688 00:40:17,454 --> 00:40:19,222 It's a really good place to start. Come on. 689 00:40:19,289 --> 00:40:21,224 Keep it coming. Let's go. 690 00:40:21,324 --> 00:40:22,626 -Mm? -I'm serious. 691 00:40:22,759 --> 00:40:24,961 [Stacy laughs] 692 00:40:27,030 --> 00:40:29,165 I'm thinking about it. 693 00:40:29,299 --> 00:40:31,635 I'm considering it. 694 00:40:31,735 --> 00:40:33,403 I know, I know, I know. 695 00:40:33,470 --> 00:40:34,805 I'm running away, 696 00:40:34,905 --> 00:40:36,673 running away from my problems. 697 00:40:36,807 --> 00:40:38,909 But this problem goes with me, so 698 00:40:38,975 --> 00:40:41,512 I'm not running from anything. 699 00:40:43,413 --> 00:40:45,482 Would I miss my daughters? Uh... 700 00:40:45,616 --> 00:40:48,819 Honestly, I don't... I don't know. 701 00:40:48,952 --> 00:40:51,855 And part of me thinks it would be better for them. 702 00:40:51,988 --> 00:40:53,990 You know, live their own lives. 703 00:40:54,825 --> 00:40:56,827 Maybe they could move with you. 704 00:40:56,960 --> 00:40:58,595 I mean, it doesn't sound like either of them are bound 705 00:40:58,662 --> 00:41:01,197 -to the city. -That's what I said. 706 00:41:01,297 --> 00:41:02,999 My oldest daughter needs it. 707 00:41:03,099 --> 00:41:04,334 I... 708 00:41:05,101 --> 00:41:07,804 ...actually threatened to cut her off if she didn't. 709 00:41:07,904 --> 00:41:09,773 That's not very nice. 710 00:41:09,873 --> 00:41:13,043 Oh, what, do they teach sarcasm 711 00:41:13,143 --> 00:41:15,211 in therapy school these days? 712 00:41:16,012 --> 00:41:18,549 Well, if by "therapy school" you mean Dartmouth, 713 00:41:18,649 --> 00:41:21,685 then, yeah, they kind of invented it there. 714 00:41:26,189 --> 00:41:27,891 You think I should? 715 00:41:30,293 --> 00:41:32,863 Not my place to say, but... 716 00:41:34,631 --> 00:41:37,067 ...I think you should consider it, 717 00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:38,702 and I'll tell you why. 718 00:41:38,835 --> 00:41:41,304 Because you are actively weighing your future 719 00:41:41,404 --> 00:41:44,107 and the consequences of your choices in that future, 720 00:41:44,207 --> 00:41:45,709 and that's healthy. That's good for your soul. 721 00:41:45,809 --> 00:41:48,812 So whether you actually do it is irrelevant. 722 00:41:48,879 --> 00:41:51,682 But you should seriously consider it. 723 00:41:51,782 --> 00:41:53,884 You should consider 724 00:41:53,984 --> 00:41:55,652 moving to Europe, 725 00:41:55,752 --> 00:41:57,153 spend a year traveling. 726 00:41:57,253 --> 00:41:58,789 You've got the financial means, 727 00:41:58,889 --> 00:42:00,891 no responsibilities here preventing it. 728 00:42:00,991 --> 00:42:04,194 You should consider everything. 729 00:42:06,096 --> 00:42:08,231 Wish I could have met him. 730 00:42:08,331 --> 00:42:10,233 Must have been a hell of a man. 731 00:42:10,333 --> 00:42:11,868 Because you are a hell of a woman. 732 00:42:11,935 --> 00:42:14,370 You know who you are and you're not ashamed of it. 733 00:42:14,437 --> 00:42:17,708 And this-- the yelling, and crying and pondering-- 734 00:42:17,808 --> 00:42:20,376 this is what you're supposed to be doing. 735 00:42:20,443 --> 00:42:22,212 This is grieving. 736 00:42:22,312 --> 00:42:25,348 This is accepting an immeasurable loss in your life 737 00:42:25,448 --> 00:42:28,418 and racking your brain to try to find a way to survive it. 738 00:42:29,686 --> 00:42:31,287 And you will. 739 00:42:32,589 --> 00:42:34,858 [sighs] 740 00:42:34,958 --> 00:42:37,127 Thank you, Phil. 741 00:42:37,928 --> 00:42:39,796 Wow. This has been... 742 00:42:41,264 --> 00:42:42,933 ...pleasantly cathartic. 743 00:42:43,033 --> 00:42:44,935 [sniffles] I took one look at that sweater, 744 00:42:45,035 --> 00:42:48,371 and I had very little faith in you, but you-- 745 00:42:48,471 --> 00:42:49,806 you overcame it. 746 00:42:49,906 --> 00:42:53,376 Turns out you don't suck at your job. 747 00:42:53,476 --> 00:42:56,747 Well, that is wildly offensive. 748 00:42:56,847 --> 00:42:58,148 Thank you. 749 00:42:58,248 --> 00:43:00,116 Same time tomorrow? 750 00:43:00,216 --> 00:43:02,152 I'm thinking afternoon. 751 00:43:02,285 --> 00:43:04,554 I still got five clients, and I'm pretty drunk. 752 00:43:04,655 --> 00:43:08,258 I think you are a client to end the day with, not begin one. 753 00:43:08,324 --> 00:43:10,761 Fine. See you at happy hour. 754 00:43:10,827 --> 00:43:13,396 * serene music * 755 00:43:15,598 --> 00:43:17,801 [keys clatter] 756 00:43:20,837 --> 00:43:22,839 [indistinct chatter on TV] 757 00:43:27,678 --> 00:43:29,312 [weatherwoman] Across the northern plains and into 758 00:43:29,445 --> 00:43:32,816 the upper Midwest, a colder air mass is settling in. 759 00:43:32,916 --> 00:43:35,618 [overlapping, indistinct chatter continues on TVs] 760 00:43:40,824 --> 00:43:42,158 Who's your realtor? 761 00:43:42,258 --> 00:43:45,328 Yeah. No matter what I do, I can't stay here. 762 00:43:45,428 --> 00:43:48,164 Lili, I can smell him. 763 00:43:48,264 --> 00:43:50,100 Hold on, hold on. 764 00:43:52,168 --> 00:43:53,536 Is everything okay? 765 00:43:53,670 --> 00:43:56,873 -So, um, Paige is-is-is in bed, -[Paige crying] 766 00:43:57,007 --> 00:43:58,341 and she won't talk, 767 00:43:58,441 --> 00:44:00,711 and she can't stop crying, and she's... 768 00:44:00,811 --> 00:44:02,512 Well, she's hyperventilating, and I feel like 769 00:44:02,645 --> 00:44:04,314 I should call an ambulance, but I don't... 770 00:44:04,380 --> 00:44:06,116 Like, I feel like that might make her worse. 771 00:44:06,216 --> 00:44:07,684 No, you're right, you're right. It would. 772 00:44:07,784 --> 00:44:09,119 I'll be there in 15 minutes. 773 00:44:09,185 --> 00:44:12,022 -Call Abby. -Okay, okay. Calling her now. 774 00:44:31,574 --> 00:44:33,209 -[door buzzes] -[lock clicks] 775 00:44:34,878 --> 00:44:35,879 [doorbell rings] 776 00:44:35,979 --> 00:44:37,480 [Paige crying] 777 00:44:37,547 --> 00:44:38,815 [sighs] 778 00:44:38,915 --> 00:44:40,784 -Is she in the bedroom? -Yeah. 779 00:44:40,884 --> 00:44:43,186 [sighs] 780 00:44:44,554 --> 00:44:46,256 Uh... 781 00:44:46,389 --> 00:44:47,724 do you have any sweets? 782 00:44:47,824 --> 00:44:50,693 -Sweets? -Okay, get some ice cream-- 783 00:44:50,761 --> 00:44:53,563 rocky road-- and buy some chocolate chips. 784 00:44:53,696 --> 00:44:55,698 Put three scoops in a glass of milk, 785 00:44:55,766 --> 00:44:57,133 put the chocolate chips on top, 786 00:44:57,233 --> 00:44:59,302 and-and then just bring it to me with a spoon. 787 00:44:59,402 --> 00:45:01,237 That sounds, uh, disgusting, to start. 788 00:45:01,371 --> 00:45:03,406 I wasn't asking your opinion of it, Russell. 789 00:45:03,506 --> 00:45:05,708 [doorbell ringing] 790 00:45:09,913 --> 00:45:11,247 I got rocky road. 791 00:45:11,347 --> 00:45:13,016 Desperate times call for desperate measures. 792 00:45:13,116 --> 00:45:16,152 -Grabbed the chocolate chips? -The shitty ones like she likes. 793 00:45:16,252 --> 00:45:17,287 Well, looks like all we need 794 00:45:17,387 --> 00:45:18,755 from you is a cup, Russell. 795 00:45:18,889 --> 00:45:20,090 Give it to her. 796 00:45:20,223 --> 00:45:22,492 -She knows how to make it. -Got it. Okay. 797 00:45:23,726 --> 00:45:25,762 -[crying] -Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 798 00:45:25,862 --> 00:45:28,098 -Hey, it's okay. It's okay. -I... I'm sorry. 799 00:45:28,198 --> 00:45:30,934 It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. You know what this is? 800 00:45:31,034 --> 00:45:32,235 Wha-What? 801 00:45:32,335 --> 00:45:34,004 This is how much you loved him. 802 00:45:34,104 --> 00:45:37,040 And your body just doesn't know where to put all that love now. 803 00:45:37,140 --> 00:45:38,775 Okay? But you don't have to put it anywhere. 804 00:45:38,875 --> 00:45:41,111 And you don't have to stop loving someone 805 00:45:41,211 --> 00:45:42,412 when they're gone, honey. 806 00:45:42,478 --> 00:45:44,414 In fact, one could argue 807 00:45:44,514 --> 00:45:46,382 that you should love them more. 808 00:45:46,449 --> 00:45:49,552 And here's a sad fact of life. 809 00:45:51,454 --> 00:45:52,923 You will feel this way again. 810 00:45:52,989 --> 00:45:55,125 -No. -Yeah, when I die. 811 00:45:55,225 --> 00:45:57,794 When your husband dies and your friends. 812 00:45:57,928 --> 00:45:59,462 And-and someday, 813 00:45:59,595 --> 00:46:02,332 your children will feel this way about you. 814 00:46:03,099 --> 00:46:05,802 Thanks, Mom. I feel so much better. 815 00:46:05,902 --> 00:46:07,637 [Abigail] I come bearing gifts. 816 00:46:07,737 --> 00:46:09,339 [Paige] I'm not hungry. 817 00:46:09,472 --> 00:46:12,008 It's not food. It is a drug. 818 00:46:12,142 --> 00:46:15,178 It is sugar and chocolate in a mixture 819 00:46:15,278 --> 00:46:16,646 that only your metabolism can process in a way 820 00:46:16,779 --> 00:46:18,448 that doesn't end up on your hips. 821 00:46:18,514 --> 00:46:20,483 And I hate you for it. 822 00:46:23,153 --> 00:46:25,355 I used to eat this when I was, like, five. 823 00:46:25,488 --> 00:46:28,058 Well, you still act five, so... 824 00:46:28,925 --> 00:46:30,560 Mmm. 825 00:46:31,427 --> 00:46:32,762 Fuck you and your bad roots. 826 00:46:32,863 --> 00:46:34,530 Now she's back. 827 00:46:34,664 --> 00:46:37,067 I don't understand it. 828 00:46:37,167 --> 00:46:39,802 It's the crunch with the cold 829 00:46:39,903 --> 00:46:41,437 and the mushy of the ice cream. 830 00:46:41,504 --> 00:46:42,805 Right. 831 00:46:42,906 --> 00:46:45,675 The explanation doesn't sell it, Paige. 832 00:46:45,775 --> 00:46:46,776 Well... 833 00:46:46,877 --> 00:46:48,211 You got her? 834 00:46:49,045 --> 00:46:50,480 I got her, but I cannot stay the night. 835 00:46:50,546 --> 00:46:51,982 [Stacy] I can stay the night. 836 00:46:52,082 --> 00:46:53,917 [shaky breaths, sniffles] 837 00:46:55,485 --> 00:46:57,653 [sniffles] 838 00:46:59,890 --> 00:47:01,391 Mmm. 839 00:47:02,325 --> 00:47:05,095 -This is my favorite thing ever. -I know. 840 00:47:13,870 --> 00:47:16,539 [sighs] 841 00:47:16,639 --> 00:47:18,608 She okay? 842 00:47:20,210 --> 00:47:21,878 Yeah, she will be. 843 00:47:22,778 --> 00:47:24,280 Mm. 844 00:47:24,380 --> 00:47:27,250 Is there a decent bar near here? 845 00:47:27,383 --> 00:47:29,285 Um, there's a... 846 00:47:29,385 --> 00:47:31,922 there's a dive bar around the corner. 847 00:47:32,022 --> 00:47:35,892 Well, SoHo's version of a dive bar. 848 00:47:37,293 --> 00:47:39,062 Hmm. 849 00:47:45,068 --> 00:47:47,303 [indistinct chatter] 850 00:47:50,606 --> 00:47:53,176 Hmm. What's this place called? 851 00:47:53,243 --> 00:47:55,111 Um, I don't know. 852 00:47:55,245 --> 00:47:57,480 I'm-I'm not sure it has a name. 853 00:47:58,915 --> 00:48:01,117 [mutters] 854 00:48:02,718 --> 00:48:04,487 [Stacy] Hmm. 855 00:48:08,858 --> 00:48:10,560 Hi. 856 00:48:10,660 --> 00:48:12,395 What's the name of this place? 857 00:48:12,495 --> 00:48:15,231 Name? Uh, people just call it the bar. 858 00:48:15,331 --> 00:48:17,600 Or the bar down the street. Something like that. 859 00:48:17,700 --> 00:48:19,970 -No name? -Not that I'm aware of, no. 860 00:48:20,070 --> 00:48:21,704 What does your paycheck say? 861 00:48:21,804 --> 00:48:24,274 Uh, XT Enterprises LLC 862 00:48:24,374 --> 00:48:26,109 or some shit. 863 00:48:26,209 --> 00:48:28,078 [short chuckle] 864 00:48:28,178 --> 00:48:30,046 Okay, so... 865 00:48:30,113 --> 00:48:32,815 Bar just doesn't have a name. 866 00:48:32,915 --> 00:48:34,584 No name. What can I get you? 867 00:48:34,684 --> 00:48:36,119 Oh, God. I'm, uh... 868 00:48:36,252 --> 00:48:38,688 I am not in the mood to make any decisions. 869 00:48:38,788 --> 00:48:40,590 Mm-hmm. Martini? 870 00:48:40,656 --> 00:48:42,492 Oh, that is a cocktail, 871 00:48:42,625 --> 00:48:45,261 and this is the furthest place from a cocktail bar, so... 872 00:48:45,328 --> 00:48:48,331 True that. Uh, how about a Irish car bomb? 873 00:48:48,431 --> 00:48:50,366 I have no idea what that is. 874 00:48:50,466 --> 00:48:52,235 -Trust me. -[Stacy] Okay. 875 00:48:52,302 --> 00:48:53,503 What about you? 876 00:48:53,636 --> 00:48:54,837 What kind of amber ales do you have? 877 00:48:54,937 --> 00:48:56,539 That'll be two Irish car bombs. 878 00:48:56,639 --> 00:48:58,841 Hey, I like your style. Two Irish car bombs. 879 00:48:58,975 --> 00:49:00,243 I have to work in the morning. 880 00:49:00,343 --> 00:49:02,545 It's one drink, Russell. 881 00:49:07,317 --> 00:49:09,185 Ooh, I didn't see that coming. 882 00:49:09,319 --> 00:49:12,655 -Um... -Oh, gosh. Apologies, Russell. 883 00:49:13,489 --> 00:49:16,492 This is gonna hurt. 884 00:49:17,293 --> 00:49:19,129 Uh, y-- 885 00:49:19,195 --> 00:49:21,564 Great. [clears throat] 886 00:49:21,664 --> 00:49:23,966 -You got to... Yeah. -[Stacy] Yeah. 887 00:49:31,341 --> 00:49:33,976 -[Stacy laughing] -It went down the wrong pipe. 888 00:49:34,077 --> 00:49:35,811 -[coughs] -[laughs] 889 00:49:35,911 --> 00:49:37,880 I have a bad gag reflex. 890 00:49:38,014 --> 00:49:39,215 -[coughs] -No, no. I'm not... 891 00:49:39,315 --> 00:49:41,284 I'm-I'm not laughing at that. 892 00:49:41,384 --> 00:49:43,853 What, then? 893 00:49:43,953 --> 00:49:46,522 Oh, life. 894 00:49:47,357 --> 00:49:48,891 And the choices people make. 895 00:49:49,025 --> 00:49:50,593 Don't get me wrong. 896 00:49:50,693 --> 00:49:52,728 She made a good one with you. 897 00:49:54,964 --> 00:49:56,566 What are your dreams? 898 00:49:58,868 --> 00:50:00,670 -Dreams? -Or... 899 00:50:00,770 --> 00:50:04,540 you know, "aspirations" might be a better word. 900 00:50:04,640 --> 00:50:06,209 For your life. 901 00:50:06,342 --> 00:50:08,078 For my daughter. 902 00:50:08,211 --> 00:50:09,645 I mean, what-- Uh, you know, 903 00:50:09,745 --> 00:50:11,047 we-we just got the town house, so we-- 904 00:50:11,181 --> 00:50:14,684 Yeah, well, that's a purchase, not a dream. 905 00:50:14,784 --> 00:50:18,054 -[weak chuckle] -Have you two 906 00:50:18,154 --> 00:50:21,391 -talked about starting a family? -Uh, 907 00:50:21,524 --> 00:50:22,725 you know Paige. 908 00:50:22,858 --> 00:50:24,160 She just got down to a size zero, 909 00:50:24,260 --> 00:50:25,661 and she worked really hard for it, so-- 910 00:50:25,728 --> 00:50:27,530 Okay, Russell, Russell, independent thoughts. 911 00:50:27,630 --> 00:50:29,599 Do you have any? 912 00:50:31,434 --> 00:50:34,036 Yeah, I mean, I guess I want-I want to have kids. 913 00:50:34,137 --> 00:50:35,905 -Mm-hmm. Okay. -And I want to raise them, 914 00:50:36,038 --> 00:50:37,407 and I want to... 915 00:50:37,540 --> 00:50:39,109 I want to move out of town, 916 00:50:39,242 --> 00:50:40,943 you know, where they can have a normal-- 917 00:50:41,043 --> 00:50:42,578 You know, tr-- you know, trick-or-treat 918 00:50:42,678 --> 00:50:45,181 and-and play baseball 919 00:50:45,248 --> 00:50:46,949 and run out on the street, you know? 920 00:50:47,083 --> 00:50:48,418 Mm. No, I don't know. 921 00:50:48,518 --> 00:50:50,653 No, I don't know. I raised mine here. 922 00:50:50,753 --> 00:50:52,021 Right. 923 00:50:52,088 --> 00:50:54,790 Well, that would be my dream. [clears throat] 924 00:50:54,890 --> 00:50:57,127 What about when they're grown? 925 00:50:58,528 --> 00:50:59,862 -What's the dream then? -[laughs] 926 00:50:59,929 --> 00:51:01,764 I don't know. I don't know. 927 00:51:01,864 --> 00:51:03,065 I-I haven't gotten that far. 928 00:51:03,166 --> 00:51:05,501 Yeah, well, then you need a new dream. 929 00:51:07,903 --> 00:51:11,174 Honestly, I always thought of you and Preston as the dream. 930 00:51:14,910 --> 00:51:16,746 So did I, Russell. 931 00:51:16,846 --> 00:51:19,115 * thoughtful music * 932 00:51:20,550 --> 00:51:22,818 But that dream is over. 933 00:51:23,953 --> 00:51:25,955 Then I guess we both need a new one. 934 00:51:26,055 --> 00:51:28,258 [chuckles softly] 935 00:51:29,125 --> 00:51:30,793 Yeah. 936 00:51:49,078 --> 00:51:51,214 *** 60464

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