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All language subtitles for Trump Will End Iran War When He ＂Feels It in His Bones,＂ Says Iran May Be Hit Again ＂Just for Fun＂ [JIFkZkiexPM]

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,880 Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself. Welcome, everybody. 2 00:00:02,100 --> 00:00:04,880 Welcome, welcome, welcome to The Tonight Show. 3 00:00:05,200 --> 00:00:07,960 This is it. You're here. You made it. Thank you for watching. 4 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:12,640 Guys, this is one of the best times of the year. It's spring break. 5 00:00:15,580 --> 00:00:16,740 Tomorrow is St. 6 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:17,960 Patrick's Day. 7 00:00:19,780 --> 00:00:21,900 And it's officially March Madness. 8 00:00:22,240 --> 00:00:26,840 Or as your liver calls it, one battle after another. 9 00:00:29,070 --> 00:00:33,070 That's right. March Madness kicks off this week, and I read that 100 million 10 00:00:33,070 --> 00:00:35,330 brackets are expected to be filled out. Ooh. 11 00:00:35,650 --> 00:00:38,430 Yeah, we actually have an office pool here, and the stakes are pretty high. 12 00:00:38,430 --> 00:00:40,030 year, the winner gets one gallon of gas. 13 00:00:42,210 --> 00:00:46,090 Yeah, everyone loves filling out a bracket. Even President Trump did one. 14 00:00:46,090 --> 00:00:47,069 see it? 15 00:00:47,070 --> 00:00:48,730 Even that's redacted. Oh, wow. 16 00:00:49,770 --> 00:00:51,410 Even that's redacted. Wow. That's crazy. 17 00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:57,980 Let's get to some news. Well, guys, today is day 17 of the war in Iran, and 18 00:00:57,980 --> 00:01:01,720 Trump just said that the war will end when he, quote, feels it in his bones. 19 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:04,240 That's reassuring. 20 00:01:05,420 --> 00:01:08,680 Can't wait till Trump goes on social media and posts, feeling cute might 21 00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:09,680 Sweden later. 22 00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:15,240 Today, Trump claimed that a former U .S. president recently told him that he 23 00:01:15,240 --> 00:01:18,240 wished he had taken action against Iran, but didn't say which one. 24 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:22,420 Trump was like, I won't say who, but we had a great conversation in my bathroom 25 00:01:22,420 --> 00:01:23,420 mirror. 26 00:01:26,050 --> 00:01:29,550 In an interview over the weekend, Trump said that U .S. strikes have totally 27 00:01:29,550 --> 00:01:34,410 demolished Iran's Karg Island, but we may hit it a few more times, quote, just 28 00:01:34,410 --> 00:01:35,410 for fun. 29 00:01:36,690 --> 00:01:39,610 Jeez, I can't believe the Nobel Peace Prize committee just keeps snuffing this 30 00:01:39,610 --> 00:01:41,530 guy. I don't know. I don't understand what the problem is. 31 00:01:42,470 --> 00:01:45,510 Yeah, Trump has continued to escalate the war in the Middle East, and you 32 00:01:45,510 --> 00:01:48,910 not think that's what his voters elected him to do, but check out this interview 33 00:01:48,910 --> 00:01:52,470 we did with a Trump supporter right before he began his second term. Look at 34 00:01:52,470 --> 00:01:55,700 this. Sir, you voted for President Trump. What are you hoping to see from a 35 00:01:55,700 --> 00:01:56,700 second Trump administration? 36 00:01:57,280 --> 00:02:00,980 Well, I'm a working class guy with three kids, so it's pretty simple. 37 00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:05,480 I hope he attacks Iran without any particular goal in mind and sends gas 38 00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:06,399 through the roof. 39 00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:10,180 And I want to be specific here. I don't want him to know why he's starting a war 40 00:02:10,180 --> 00:02:15,020 or when it'll end, but I do want it to cost $82 to fill up my Kia Sorento. 41 00:02:15,460 --> 00:02:19,540 Of course, my true dream is that it'll make Marco Rubio wear shoes that are way 42 00:02:19,540 --> 00:02:22,420 too big for him, but I don't want to push my luck. 43 00:02:23,630 --> 00:02:24,730 Wow, isn't that amazing? 44 00:02:26,210 --> 00:02:27,950 Exactly what they want. 45 00:02:28,890 --> 00:02:31,170 This guy's got to be feeling pretty good right now. Yeah. 46 00:02:31,790 --> 00:02:34,690 Yeah, well, this is big. Trump has been complaining that the headlines about the 47 00:02:34,690 --> 00:02:36,010 war in Iran are too negative. 48 00:02:36,510 --> 00:02:39,370 Trump is always saying the media is against him, so he actually started 49 00:02:39,370 --> 00:02:40,610 some headlines of his own. 50 00:02:40,930 --> 00:02:41,930 I'll show you what I mean. 51 00:02:42,290 --> 00:02:46,630 The original headline says, War in Iran stretches into third week with no exit 52 00:02:46,630 --> 00:02:52,520 plan. But Trump's headline is, Trump geniusly keeps military plans top 53 00:02:52,620 --> 00:02:53,640 even from himself. 54 00:02:56,440 --> 00:02:57,440 Next up. 55 00:02:59,100 --> 00:03:05,200 Gas prices skyrocket to $3 .70 per gallon, but Trump's headline says, 56 00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:07,180 never been a better time to buy a Tesla. 57 00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:11,240 Next up. 58 00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:12,600 Wow. 59 00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:15,720 Kim Jong -un oversees nuclear tests. 60 00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:20,020 Bestie acting cray -cray and I'm seated. 61 00:03:22,460 --> 00:03:27,900 And finally, Popeye's chicken closing dozens of locations. 62 00:03:28,820 --> 00:03:32,780 Trump barricades self -insituation room to deal with national emergency. 63 00:03:37,900 --> 00:03:39,140 Oh, I didn't have the head. 64 00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:43,440 Switching gears to some entertainment news. Last night was the 98th Academy 65 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:45,200 Awards. Oh, yeah. 66 00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:52,160 It was a historic night for the first time the Oscars modeled their stage 67 00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:53,460 a P .F. Chang. Oh. 68 00:03:57,800 --> 00:04:01,480 This is wild. There was a tie for best live action short film. 69 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:03,020 And here's one of the winners. 70 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:17,820 Well, people are talking about this. One of the stars of Marty's Supreme Shark 71 00:04:17,820 --> 00:04:20,720 Tank, Kevin O 'Leary, had a very interesting outfit. Look at this. 72 00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:22,200 Oh. 73 00:04:23,320 --> 00:04:25,620 Looks like a karate instructor who won Powerball. 74 00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:31,060 Well, some business news. BuzzFeed says that they have substantial doubt that 75 00:04:31,060 --> 00:04:32,060 they can stay in business. 76 00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:36,480 Here to tell us more about this is BuzzFeed spokesman Peter McNally. Peter, 77 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:37,600 welcome. 78 00:04:39,020 --> 00:04:40,460 Thanks for having me. 79 00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:44,140 So what exactly is causing the decline of BuzzFeed? 80 00:04:44,680 --> 00:04:50,240 Want to feel old? These 17 BuzzFeed articles haven't been clicked on in 12 81 00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:51,240 years. 82 00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:54,160 I'm sorry, why are you talking like that? 83 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:59,000 Only 90s kids will remember why I'm talking like this. 84 00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:02,560 BuzzFeed didn't even exist in the 90s. 85 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:06,780 23 signs you're the know -it -all in your friend group. 86 00:05:07,880 --> 00:05:11,240 I see what you're doing, but I'm pretty sure clickbait doesn't work if you're 87 00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:12,240 just saying it out loud. 88 00:05:12,390 --> 00:05:18,190 You sure, Jimmy? Because this next sentence might be the craziest thing you 89 00:05:18,190 --> 00:05:19,190 today. 90 00:05:20,150 --> 00:05:21,390 Okay, what is it? 91 00:05:22,190 --> 00:05:25,950 I'd tell you, but only 90s kids would understand. 92 00:05:26,810 --> 00:05:30,870 Stop talking about 90s kids. Do you have any ideas for ways to save BuzzFeed? 93 00:05:31,550 --> 00:05:36,570 No, but this one simple trick will change the way you cook eggs forever. 94 00:05:37,090 --> 00:05:39,150 Look, I don't think we're getting anywhere here. 95 00:05:39,350 --> 00:05:41,310 Wait, I have something to say. 96 00:05:41,870 --> 00:05:43,290 And I promise it's not clickbait. 97 00:05:43,630 --> 00:05:45,410 It's just a true statement of fact. 98 00:05:45,930 --> 00:05:48,370 Great. Finally, what is it? 99 00:05:49,190 --> 00:05:53,090 You won't believe what Jimmy Fallon looks like now. All right, we got to 100 00:05:53,090 --> 00:05:54,550 on. We got to move on. 101 00:05:54,870 --> 00:05:58,930 Thank you. Only 90s kids have to move on. Sorry, thank you, but thank you very 102 00:05:58,930 --> 00:05:59,930 much. 103 00:06:01,490 --> 00:06:05,830 Well, this made me laugh. I feel like Kevin Hart is asking a museum to redo a 104 00:06:05,830 --> 00:06:09,470 wax statue of him because it doesn't look anything like it. Do you see this? 105 00:06:09,950 --> 00:06:11,630 This is real. Can we see the statue? 106 00:06:12,610 --> 00:06:13,610 Wow. 107 00:06:16,090 --> 00:06:18,730 I don't know who that is. 108 00:06:18,970 --> 00:06:20,530 I don't know who that is. That's not Kevin Hart. 109 00:06:21,410 --> 00:06:22,410 Kevin Hart, man. 110 00:06:23,290 --> 00:06:24,290 Dude, 111 00:06:25,330 --> 00:06:28,210 that looks like Jake from State Farm. 112 00:06:30,450 --> 00:06:35,690 It's interesting. But now I guess other statues are speaking out about that. Oh, 113 00:06:35,710 --> 00:06:36,639 good. 114 00:06:36,640 --> 00:06:40,080 For example, this statue of soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo said, And 115 00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:46,360 this statue of Lucille Ball said, 116 00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:54,060 And this plaque of Elvis Presley 117 00:06:54,060 --> 00:07:00,960 said, Then this 118 00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:02,280 wax figure of Prince William said, 119 00:07:07,429 --> 00:07:14,230 And finally, this wax figure of Leonardo DiCaprio said, And 120 00:07:14,230 --> 00:07:29,790 finally, 121 00:07:30,810 --> 00:07:33,910 I read that Taco Bell is introducing an edible sauce packet. 122 00:07:35,340 --> 00:07:39,600 Edible sauce packets talk about customers like, wait, were we not 123 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:41,940 eating the sauce packets? We have a great show. 124 00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:43,820 Give it up for The Roots right there. 125 00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:47,180 Hey 126 00:07:47,180 --> 00:07:57,500 guys, 127 00:07:57,720 --> 00:08:01,760 St. Patrick's Day is tomorrow and we wanted to do something special for that. 128 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,420 So we had some of these made. 129 00:08:11,400 --> 00:08:12,099 That's right. 130 00:08:12,100 --> 00:08:14,380 That's right. A great quality cotton. 131 00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:16,800 Love it. It's a great quality cotton. 132 00:08:17,100 --> 00:08:19,200 And it makes a great scarf. 133 00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:21,100 As well as a shirt. 134 00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:23,920 When you're eating your soda bread. 135 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:25,820 And you're splitting the G. 136 00:08:27,060 --> 00:08:28,060 Split the G. 137 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:31,700 Don't split the G. You split my G instead of splitting your own G. 138 00:08:32,960 --> 00:08:36,480 Well, it is the Fallon four -leaf clover, which no one knows about. 139 00:08:37,640 --> 00:08:40,620 It actually is there. It's the monologue mark that I walk out to every night. 140 00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:44,100 Oh. I stand on, instead of a star, I stand on a four -leaf clover. Oh. 141 00:08:44,360 --> 00:08:50,420 Yeah. So anyways, these are available. They're very decent price. How much? 142 00:08:50,420 --> 00:08:51,920 $700? $89 .95. 143 00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:55,380 Anyways, these are available online. 144 00:08:55,580 --> 00:08:57,280 Everyone can pick these up. They're cheap. 145 00:08:57,720 --> 00:08:58,960 $87 each. 146 00:08:59,680 --> 00:09:00,680 You can go online. 147 00:09:00,940 --> 00:09:01,940 The NBC Store. 148 00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:03,580 Who? The website. 149 00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:05,780 Is that what it's called? The NBC Store? 150 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:07,320 It can't be. 151 00:09:08,740 --> 00:09:11,720 You want me to Google what it is? Yeah, could you do that right now? Thank you. 152 00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:13,460 I love my producers. Yeah. Amazing. 153 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:16,580 Can you Google it? Google it. Google it. 154 00:09:17,060 --> 00:09:18,060 Google it. 155 00:09:18,560 --> 00:09:20,720 It's got to be NBCstore .com. One would think. 156 00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:22,280 It's not the NBCstore. 157 00:09:23,720 --> 00:09:24,720 NBCstore. 158 00:09:25,900 --> 00:09:27,000 It says coffee mug. 159 00:09:27,220 --> 00:09:28,220 Oh, okay. 160 00:09:28,420 --> 00:09:29,420 It really does. 161 00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:32,440 NBCstore .com. 162 00:09:35,500 --> 00:09:39,520 You can save 15 % if you just type in your birthday in your email. Is there a 163 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:40,359 coupon? 164 00:09:40,360 --> 00:09:41,360 Yeah. 165 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:42,480 Look. 166 00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:45,080 Oh, wow, you can get any kind of coffee mug you want. 167 00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:47,200 That's the homepage. 168 00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:51,100 Yeah. Are they like show coffee mugs? Yeah, you like the office? 169 00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:56,300 Sure, love it. Yeah, they got a bunch of old office coffee mugs. Oh, so stuff 170 00:09:56,300 --> 00:09:57,420 that's currently on NBC. 171 00:10:00,540 --> 00:10:01,540 No, that's great. 172 00:10:02,540 --> 00:10:05,740 Kelly Clarkson show. That's on everything. That's across the hall, 173 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:08,120 Features. Oh, love that. Love watching that. 174 00:10:08,680 --> 00:10:09,840 It's a film production. 175 00:10:10,060 --> 00:10:11,060 Sure. 176 00:10:12,700 --> 00:10:14,760 Late Night with Seth Meyers corrections mug. 177 00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:16,080 Oh. 178 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:19,600 For the bit he does during a show. 179 00:10:19,940 --> 00:10:22,280 Yeah. Do you like that bit? Yeah, I love that bit. There's a mug for it. So I 180 00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:23,280 get a mug for it. That's great. 181 00:10:23,580 --> 00:10:25,500 We're not even on this. Why? 182 00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:27,500 I'm not kidding. 183 00:10:28,020 --> 00:10:30,080 We're not even on. See, we don't have one mug. 184 00:10:31,889 --> 00:10:34,610 Yeah, there you go. We used to have like a video with it. Did you see it? 185 00:10:35,250 --> 00:10:38,590 Yeah, you went past it. Oh, I went past it? Yeah. Up, up, up. 186 00:10:39,570 --> 00:10:40,870 That's me. But where's the mug? 187 00:10:41,930 --> 00:10:45,170 Is that my face is the mug? Move the cursor. That's your mug shot. 188 00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:48,730 Thank you. 189 00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:52,290 Oh, there it is. Thank you. Yeah, this is the one I use. 190 00:10:53,150 --> 00:10:54,650 These are probably for sale as well. 191 00:10:54,910 --> 00:10:56,450 There you go. I got one. These are cheap. 192 00:10:57,210 --> 00:10:58,210 I just went and bought one. 193 00:10:58,430 --> 00:10:59,650 Mine is discounted. 194 00:11:01,030 --> 00:11:04,230 Yours is in the discount bin. Mine's discounted. 195 00:11:04,490 --> 00:11:05,490 Let me see. 196 00:11:05,630 --> 00:11:07,150 Can we zoom in? Oh, it's on sale. 197 00:11:07,610 --> 00:11:08,810 Why is mine on sale? 198 00:11:10,270 --> 00:11:14,970 Why is the office isn't even on television anymore? And my show airs 199 00:11:14,970 --> 00:11:18,290 night. I'm 15 % off? No, because look at everyone. They're trying to tell me 200 00:11:18,290 --> 00:11:19,990 something? Guys, I'm getting canceled. 201 00:11:20,750 --> 00:11:22,190 This is how I find out? 202 00:11:22,830 --> 00:11:23,830 I blame Trump. 203 00:11:26,190 --> 00:11:29,850 This is how I find that? No, look at the price. This is ridiculous to me. Every 204 00:11:29,850 --> 00:11:33,590 other price is the same price as yours, but yours says it's discounted. $15 .95, 205 00:11:33,830 --> 00:11:35,430 every single one. No, no, $18 .95. 206 00:11:35,650 --> 00:11:38,090 What? That's a corrections bid. 207 00:11:38,610 --> 00:11:39,870 No, $16 .95. 208 00:11:40,270 --> 00:11:41,270 I'm a dollar less. 209 00:11:41,450 --> 00:11:43,510 Oh. Wait, I have two mugs in mine. 210 00:11:43,710 --> 00:11:45,850 Oh, wait. You get $16 for two mugs? 211 00:11:46,330 --> 00:11:48,670 So that's half price, yeah. False advertising. 212 00:11:48,890 --> 00:11:53,610 Yeah. I better get two mugs for that price. You get two mugs for $18 .95? 213 00:11:53,610 --> 00:11:55,050 way, you get this beautiful seat. 214 00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:00,140 Tomorrow's St. Paddy's Day. Better wear some green on St. Patrick's Day. So you 215 00:12:00,140 --> 00:12:02,760 can go to the NBC store online. They'll FedEx it to you overnight. 216 00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:05,680 They'll run it to your house. It'll be there before St. Patrick's Day. There's 217 00:12:05,680 --> 00:12:08,260 no way it will be at your house before St. Patrick's Day. 218 00:12:08,620 --> 00:12:10,840 Ever. Well, there's no way. 219 00:12:11,740 --> 00:12:13,080 Why are we telling people to buy these? 220 00:12:15,020 --> 00:12:17,320 There's no way it will get to your house before St. Patrick's Day. It's for next 221 00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:19,660 St. Patrick's Day. For next year? Yeah. Oh, okay. 222 00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:22,520 Yeah, so for next St. Patrick's Day, you want to plan ahead? 223 00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:24,480 Plan ahead. 224 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:26,040 2027, baby! 225 00:12:29,420 --> 00:12:30,420 You know what? 226 00:12:31,660 --> 00:12:35,460 No one in this crowd has to worry about it. Because everyone's going home with 227 00:12:35,460 --> 00:12:36,419 their shirt tonight. 228 00:12:36,420 --> 00:12:37,420 Come on. 17696