Original subtitles

I'm a motel clerk. Oh?

What's that like?

Well, it's a pretty interesting job, you know. It's not just handing out keys

and checking people in.

If it is, that's all it is, and that's all it ever will be.

Well, you made the right choice.

I wouldn't have to put myself through this humiliation if you would come to

senses and go out with me.

I know you were doing fine for the first 20 seconds. You gotta give a lot in

that. I try, you know? I do. I mean, the gate opens. I'm fine. I come out.

I'm riding the bronc. I'm holding on.

And the next thing you know, I'm flying through the air and the rodeo clown

comes out and I'm running for the barrel.

I've got to get out of this town.

What's wrong?

I'm giving this guy my phone number and he tells me he already had it.

Do you know what this means?

What, that he's a public restroom in New England?

No. I dated him three years ago.

I'm on my second lap.

I don't know what I'm going to do, because I'm either going to have to move

start dating ugly.

I thought by this time you'd have computer printouts to track him, boy,

the legal age.

Little Joey Refugio is turning 18 today. Happy birthday, Joey. We have a special

surprise for you that I think you're going to like.

Oh, I'm just like this town.

The bay's fished out.

I'm fished out.

I am Gloucester.

You are not Gloucester.

There's nothing left but bottom feeders and trash fish.

Looking good, Cher.

Squid. Someday when I return here from I don't know.

Got that spill on 14, Ma.

Jesse, I told you not to call me that.

Sorry, I thought that was just at home.

Yoo -hoo!

Hey, Ma, should we come for lunch?

Listen, hon, I, uh... I did something for you this morning without asking. I

know how you don't like it when I do that.

You do it all the time. Yeah, but I know you don't like it.

Wait, Ma, you didn't set me up. If you set me up, that last guy... He was nice.

He whittled.

It's not a date. It's an interview for a job. Hey, Miss Donovan. Hey, hon. It's

in Parks and Recreations, and it has benefits.

I'm not looking for a job. I'll take it. I told Mr. Pasquale you'd call him.

Ma, we've been over and over this.

I know you don't want to work with me. This isn't working with me. It's way

the hall.

No, that's not the point. And around the corner. Way down the hall, around the

corner.

Ma, this isn't about geography.

It's a good job.

I'll take it. Now, look.

I've got to run.

But he's expecting your call, so just don't embarrass me. Bye, Nancy.

Bye, Ms. Donovan.

Remember the good old days when you could just kill your parents and take

land?

I don't know. What's your problem? Anything's better than working here.

It's so bad. We work with our friends. We got flexible hours, free food. Yeah,

which you can't eat.

No, I think I'm building up a resistance.

This thing with your ma, that's the real job.

No, it puts me in an impossible position.

I mean, she practically runs the place. It's like Mid -City Hall. What if I

don't like it? I can't quit. It'll reflect on her. If I screw up, it'll

on her. If I do it for ten years and I snap and I take out everyone in the

building, it'll reflect on her.

Well, I'll take it. No, I didn't say I didn't want it. I mean, it could be a

great job.

Well, make up your mind, because I'll take it.

What makes you think you're so qualified for the job?

Oh, please. I, uh, I got way better grades than you.

I scored better on all the aptitude tests, and, uh, I got way more job

experience. Oh, yeah? And who's your mom?

I got the solution.

College boys.

Fast. Dunstaff Reservoir, and there are only two exits away.

College boys. Wow, at the most they're, what, 22?

That's like 11 in guy years.

No.

Shannon, you're way too old for them. Remember those awful guys who used to

around our high school after graduation?

You mean those guys?

Can I be creepy?

I can be creepy.

Hi,

Mr. Squally.

Your mom's not coming.

No.

She's got a job.

Too bad. I was looking forward to seeing her.

Your mother's a remarkable woman. Such an up person.

She's really the straw that stirs the drink in this building.

Yeah, she's great.

So you mentioned a job opening on the phone? You bet, you bet. I was telling

your mother about it, and she jumped right on it.

Great to have somebody looking after you like that.

I just think the world of her.

Well, I know she thinks highly of you.

So I got the job description.

Really? She thinks highly of me?

Yeah. What were her exact words, if you remember them?

Her exact words?

If you remember them.

Mr. Squally, I'm sorry, I only have a half an hour lunch break. Of course.

Okay.

Essentially, it's assisting in running the day -to -day organization and

physical operations of recreation facilities in and around the Gloucester

Would I be working closely with you? I'm afraid not.

Oh?

We'd be out in the field most of the time. Oh, you mean... like going to

and beaches and stuff like that? That's what we do.

Well, that sounds kind of cool.

It is.

It is kind of cool.

Look, your mom told me all about your schooling and your work experience, and

am required to interview several other candidates, but I'd say things look

pretty promising.

You know, you remind me a lot of your mother.

Actually, people say I look like my father. Oh, him.

Maybe I should ask you some kind of question.

Oh, yeah, sure. Fire away.

Okay. What is your theory of leisure?

My theory of leisure?

Yes. You know, everyone has a theory of leisure.

Let's see. Where do I start?

My theory of leisure.

Where do I start?

My mom says you have kind eyes.

Hey, you gotta come over to my house for dinner. I need a deflector between me

and my mom.

Can't. Sorry, I'm going out.

You can hang here as long as you want.

She still asked you to take that job?

Yep. I tried rolling up like a possum, but she never lost interest.

Now, why did I have to figure out my life like right now?

I mean, that's the beauty of working at the Pelican. It doesn't make a

statement.

More of a muffled sob.

Who are you going out with?

Shannon. You see my homework?

You've got to go with me over there. The fish are biting again.

They're practically jumping into the boat.

Wait, aren't you supposed to throw them back when they're that little?

I'm going too.

I just want to play with them first.

Hi.

Hi.

I love her.

I was a nihilist until I met her.

I used to be a brownie.

You mocking me?

Yes.

What year are you in?

Oh, it doesn't matter. I'm quitting school. I'm going to spend the rest of

life making Shannon happy.

It's been done.

Okay, we're out of here. Okay. I need to get my backpack.

Okay.

Isn't he sweet?

He's a little intense.

I know.

We have a conversation, and then we talk about the conversation, and then we

talk about talking about the conversation, and then I put a pill over

till he stops.

When are you going to go out in a boat with me, Kurt?

Um, well, that's a good question, Mr. Darman.

Kurt's not real good on boats.

You don't love to see?

No, I do.

Of course I do. I love everything about the sea. The freedom, the fresh air, the

adventure.

It's just the one thing. The water. The water.

So, you like the brisket?

Yeah. Are you going to take this job or what?

No. What?

What? You keep acting like I'm trying to punish you. I don't know where you get

this attitude.

It's just I don't like you intruding in my life, okay? I'm an adult.

Don't use that tone with your mother.

I know you're an adult. That's why I'm trying to help you get a good job.

But I can get a job if I need a job.

Listen, I know what the problem is here. You're afraid if you take this job that

you're not going to make any friends.

But, honey, after you're there a couple of weeks, you're a very likable person.

You've got to get in there and... I didn't take the job.

What? I didn't take... You didn't take the job. I got here.

Listen, maybe I should just... Sit down, Kurt. Maybe I should sit down.

How could you not take this job? I don't know. I just decided it wasn't what I

wanted. You just decided.

Carrie, we're not in an ice cream parlor. We can just pick any flavor you

You see, you're doing it again.

What? You're treating me like a kid. That's exactly why I don't want to work

with you. I don't, Kurt. Do I treat Carrie like a kid? Oh, listen, I

Stay out of this, Kurt.

Am I that much of a burden? Oh, cut the crap, Mom.

Language.

You've got to stop... You keep pushing me, and your choices for me are never my

choices. I mean, when you buy me tap shoes for my birthday, it's not like

asking me if I want to take tap lessons.

Well, excuse me for wanting you to be popular at parties.

Ma, I've been to parties.

People don't tap dance at parties. Well, maybe they should.

You know, the real problem is I shouldn't be living here. Oh, well,

stop you. I won't.

Listen. I really should just... I just want to be alone now, Kurt.

Okay.

Hey, you know, my family's just a... You're not going to hurt me, are you?

So I made this big stand, told them I was moving out.

Guess it would have been better if I'd had a place to go.

I don't have enough money to move out on my own.

You can stay here as long as you want.

Thanks. That should be cool to be roommates.

They get kind of lonely sometimes.

Shannon, when are you coming to bed?

Are you going to make him stay in the bedroom all night?

He's got water and treats. If he starts scratching on the door, I'll let him

out.

I don't know why I went out for my mom like that.

But she's not being any more annoying than usual.

Why am I so freaked out about this?

What's going on with me?

Why can't I say anything that isn't a question?

See, I think your problem is that you're still trying to figure out what to do

with your life.

Oh, and you don't care what you do with your life. Of course I do. I think about

my future all the time.

But I'm not trying to figure it out.

You lost me.

Okay. See, I know that I will achieve greatness one day.

Doing what?

I don't know.

You don't know.

So what are you doing to achieve this greatness?

Nothing.

That was always your best subject.

Here's how I see it, okay?

It's like a big graph, okay?

Here's my life over here.

Here's my greatness over here.

And they both rise independently of the other.

Neither have knowledge of the other.

Here comes my life. Here comes my greatness.

Rising, rising until one day at the perfect time they converge.

And? I achieve greatness.

Wow.

That's the stupidest idea I've ever heard in my whole life.

Well, time will tell.

Who's this guy?

I don't know. He must have followed me from school.

Oh.

Shem, this has got to stop. I mean, I'm sick of these guys following you around.

I met you.

You know who you love?

any kids wake up oh thank god because in my dream they were made entirely of

cotton candy and it was so beautiful and i loved them and i felt so guilty

because i kept eating them anyway sir i can't talk you down right now i just

need a place to stay tonight okay but i don't want to get in trouble with your

parents hey i do what i please around here what was that noise cat you have

a girl

long humilathon.

Let's just try to go to sleep, okay?

Sure.

Are you asleep?

Actually, I'm in a heightened state of awareness.

Will you see yourself in five years?

I don't know.

I might go back to school, I guess.

You know, Shannon has her whole life figured out.

Yeah. Are you writing this graph?

Is that ridiculous or what?

I don't know. You know, I sort of have the same model for myself.

You do not.

No, I do.

Mine's a little different. See, on this side of the graph, my life rises. Well,

on the other side, descending slowly and inevitably, is my doom.

Well, at least you're realistic.

Yeah.

Let's go to sleep.

Okay.

Okay, this isn't going to work.

I'm going to go check on Connor.

Don't wake him up.

I won't.

Hey, what's going on?

It's a long story. Can I sleep here tonight?

Oh, sure.

Doing laundry at 1 .30 in the morning?

Well, I should really be vacuuming, but I'm behind schedule.

All right, tuber ball. Ball.

Do you ever think about your future?

No.

I think about folding.

Then I think about the bills. And then I think about the dishes. And then I

think about running off alone to an island. And by then, it's usually time

think about folding again.

What? Nothing.

I couldn't do what you do.

I mean, I guess I have fantasies about getting married and having a kid, but...

I don't know. My fantasy's better than that. Yeah, so's mine.

Oh, man. I'll be right back.

See? Now he doesn't want to eat, and he's fussy. I'll walk with him. No, no,

forget it. You've done enough already.

Keep it down. Keep it down. Carrie's in the background. Carrie can handle it. If

she can't, that's really not my problem.

Hey, she's your friend. Well, she's your friend, too.

I have a shotgun, and I'm real cranky.

You've got two seconds to get the hell out of here before I decorate the wall

with you.

Oh, God.

Why does this happen to me?

Mom, are you praying?

No, I dropped some pie.

Well, look what the cat dragged in.

Is there more pie?

No, I just dropped the last piece on the floor.

You're kidding.

Where is it?

I threw it out.

I'm sorry.

For what?

For leaving like that.

You were gone?

I know I don't talk to you guys enough about it, but I'm just going through a

real rough time right now.

I don't know, the decision's turning into a big issue, and I guess I was just

feeling overwhelmed.

You're throwing the sinker in the garbage.

Garbage? I'll get some more tomorrow.

All right.

Don't worry, honey, you'll be fine.

Really bothers you that much to work in the same building as me? No, it's not

working. Then what is it? I don't know. No, I think you do. Just forget it. No,

just tell me.

I don't want to turn into you.

Well, I got some news for you. I didn't want to turn into my mother either, but

guess what I did to get over it.

Look, we all turn into our parents. It's just one of God's little jokes.

It's worse than you thought. It's not just my thighs.

You're afraid if you take this job, you're going to be stuck in it for the

of your life, aren't you?

Hey, when I was your age, I felt the same way. I almost take my first job

interview because of it. You did?

Yeah, I know how it feels. Every job looks like a life sentence.

Exactly.

Honey, life is bigger than that. It's full of possibilities.

And it's never what you think it's going to be.

You're going to change a hundred times before you're my age.

You think so?

Oh, yeah.

Your life is going to be great.

I know it is.

Thanks, Mom.

What was that job?

What job?

The one that you thought you were going to get stuck in.

Your job at City Hall. Not everybody's life turns out the same.

Okay.

Hon, if you don't want to take this job, don't. I just don't want you turning it

down out of fear.

Thanks, Mom.

Good night. Good night, hon.

So, um, are you going to take the job?

Why? Are you? Mom, are you? No. Honey, it's a good job.

How's campus life?

I've been banned.

Banned. The dean feels I'm a disruptive element.

Oh, the kid who climbed the clock tower.

Denise, I'm the one who helped lock him down. I know.

Maybe you should just give it a rest for a while.

I thought about that. Then I realized there's still yet another untapped pool.

Married guys.

be the young ones you know let me tell you if i see you within a hundred yards

of ryan i will gut you like a blue fish look at your face i'm kidding look at my

face i'm not oh i'd probably never do it with ryan

unless of course the population was decimated by the plague or a war shut up

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