Original subtitles

Your talent is what got you your scholarships at St Gilbert's.

Don't be who they expect you to be.

This...serious.

The scholarship kids need to fit in with the school,

not fit the school around them.

If you just want my attention, then just say that.

I don't want your attention.

Then what do you want?

I heard you're the weed man.

Are you embarrassed of me?

I just don't know why you always have to be the joke.

I promised my dad I would do well here.

We know you're black,

but we are struggling to figure out what you're actually excellent at.

Yeah.

Have you lot not watched Get Out?

That's how you man end up in a sunken place.

What are you waiting for?

SHE SCREAMS

Apparently there's, like, a secret society.

Brother, you've got to let this secret society thing go.

Make sure you don't forget us.

Remember, we made you right here.

You're a Rah'scal.

Smile.

We look good together.

Please welcome your acting head, Mrs Watlington-Geese.

As messed up as this place is, I think we all love it.

This programme contains some scenes of a sexual nature and some strong language.

You know we're missing this train, innit?

Leah, we've got enough time.

I'm only supposed to take four.

Big man, I beg you, relax your batty.

We're going to fit. Omar, get on Femi's lap.

Can I not? You know what?

If we just took overground, we would've got to the station quicker.

Hey, yo, hey, ring him again, please.

He's not answering. I'm not taking five.

Keep running your mouth and I'm dropping you two stars.

Hey!

VENTS IN BENGALI

BEEPS HORN

Don't forget to take your nastiness out the fridge.

It's not nastiness, Grandma.

It's a science project.

Why unu inna ye posh school can't just read book?

Want to cut up pig, cat and cow, want to play God.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And don't stress yourself about us, you hear?

Yeah.

Come give me a hug, then.

There's, like, three quid left on the metre

and Grandma doesn't get her money until next week.

Yeah, Malachi's going to come through.

Bruv, he ain't been here for time.

Just give me Mum's number, innit? Just give her a chance.

Come give me a hug, I got to go.

He's fine.

Take that nastiness and go.

Yo, I'm busy. Leave a message.

Malachi, where are you, bruv?

I need you to help Caleb out.

Call me when you get the chance.

Jaheim.

What?

I, um...

I was going to pop this through the door for you.

How many times do we have to tell you we don't want to know?

Yo, you can't read a watch now?

Missed you too, brother. Missed you too.

But look at you greeting me like this, bro. Come on, man.

My turn. Good?

Calm, still. People's good?

Come on. What you lot saying? Good?

All good, you know what the time is?

Move, bro, I don't care. What do you mean move?

Hurry up.

Ah, ah, ah!

Aarh, you're crushing my knees!

You lot comfy, yeah?

Oi, this doesn't feel safe.

Hey, to St Gilbert's, to bloodclart, bruv.

HORN BEEPS

Let's go! Here we go! We're going.

I swear these uniforms have gotten uglier.

Hmm? You sure it ain't just, like, your face? Oh!

Cheeky.

Uh, don't know about you lot, though,

but this time round feels kind of better.

We survived the first term storm.

Mm.

Endured the darkest depths.

Faced the wrath of the titans.

Mmm.

Well, I guess some things never change, huh? Always beefing.

Nah, she's just being petty. Mm.

You did get her dad fired. Suspended.

Pending an investigation.

I beg you, chat to her for me, please.

Me and her don't chat.

She called me a joke, innit?

Why are you lot always so sensitive?

OTHERS CHUCKLE

Forget all that.

I'm on the lookout for a new ting now.

Actually, there is this new girl.

Please, please, please, please be a black girl.

Devonye Green. Yeah, she's definitely a black girl.

I knew a white girl called Ebony.

No drama this time. Just good time.

Look how man's attitude's switch up

now he's getting that good-good, innit?

What? This one? This one.

Is he?

Don't worry about that.

What?

LAUGHTER

Mm, I've missed this.

We was doing it a lot over the holidays.

Now, we can do it every day.

Multiple times a day.

Nice pants.

Doctor Who's a big man show, you know?

They've got matching earrings.

Gilbertus numquam concedat.

Gilbertus semper duret.

Welcome back, everyone...

Hey, Miss.

You may want to zip that.

As you are all aware, due to the leadership of our previous head,

St Gilbert's has been run into the ground.

This decline in admissions has created a deficit,

and the only way St Gilbert's can continue delivering its renowned,

excellent education...

..is by tightening the purse strings.

At the end of the current term, I will be reducing

Master Ashford's scholarship programme from five places to three.

I believe financial aid should be based on talent,

rather than background.

Those on such scholarships will be given report cards.

My God.

The three with the highest marks across the term

will be awarded the scholarships.

And...

Ah, that's everything.

Enjoy the new term.

Yo. Meter's run out.

There's still no sign of Malachi.

My phone's on 10%.

I can't even make toast, G. I'm going to pattern it.

Just give me Mum's number. She said she can help.

I'll sort it, bro, chill.

Jaheim.

Jaheim!

You look stressed.

Bro, we've all just been thrown into the Hunger Games,

and you want me to be happy? Mm.

This guy. Fair enough.

What, you're still on the hunt, yeah? Yes, bruv.

Honestly, I ain't pree'd this new ting yet.

But everyone else that's decent's already paired up. Mm.

You know, sometimes you have to look further afield.

All right.

Can't lie though, it's barren.

Yeah?

Dead.

Dead.

Dead.

THEY CHUCKLE

Oi, that's a bit of you, innit?

Bruv. I know you love your white tings.

You're the one preaching chop-chop, bro.

Deal with what you're dealt with.

What, the head boy and the polyglot

not too worried about getting kicked out, yeah?

Not as worried as you should be.

MOCK CHUCKLES

Anyway, by acting headmistress.

Acting.

She's pretending, she can't take away our scholarships.

Well, she's acting like she can.

Here.

I usually like my double D's.

CHUCKLING

Yeah, very funny, very funny.

It's not the time to be making jokes.

If we all get A's, maybe she won't be able to kick us all out.

OK. This is not right, and it's targeted.

Like, we have to jump through hoops.

No, we should tell her fi suck her mudder.

So, you learned absolutely nothing from last year?

You're just giving her more reasons to kick you out, eh?

Listen to me, all right? We just need to strategise.

No, no, let me land. Go on, go on.

OK.

We could, like, do a march.

Oh. No, no, no, no, let me land, let me land.

All the time. No, no, no, no.

We skip classes.

This is why my dad said I cannot be hanging around you foolish goats.

You cheeky bastard.

Listen. Good luck, suffragette.

OK. Power to the people.

All right, you lot just leave me to it, then.

You lot can suck your mudders too.

SCHOOL BELL RINGS

So, I'll come to yours or you can come to mine.

Yeah, sure.

Mine is fine, yours is fine.

Whatever is fine.

Is that you this term, yeah, Omar? Yeah?

Last term it was all weird drawings and secret societies.

Which obviously was a hoax. Is it?

I've heard nothing from the Raisinettes.

That's a good thing.

Less with that stupidness.

More time for you and Dilton to...

What? Jab our dicks together?

I don't know what you man do.

Look, he's just coming over to study.

Study, eh? Study, eh?

No, we, we haven't...

I'm-I'm bricking it.

Not surprised.

Two virgins having sex.

Just bear hands and genitals.

Shouldn't you be telling me to relax and enjoy it?

Relax? Brother, the last thing you want to do is relax.

You came in as a virgin.

You don't want to be leaving as one.

Hear me?

Hey, pretend you told me a joke. Why?

TOBY LAUGHS

Toby.

What? Can we talk?

I was wondering if you wanted to pop round later.

Why would I do that?

Right, yes.

Well, I understand that some ill-chosen words were thrown around.

Mm. But what we had was fun, right?

Let's be honest.

Yeah, it was decent. Decent?

Fine. It was lit. You happy now?

Yes, well...

Um, I'm not saying that we get back together or anything.

I do have principles, you know.

As do I.

But I also enjoy...fun.

As do you.

Thank you, Abby, for your kind offer.

But, um, respectfully, imma decline.

Babe.

What?

I just think you should apologise.

For what?

For calling him a joke.

Yes, but to, to apologise is to...

..admit I was wrong.

You were wrong.

Exactly!

Uh.

Hey, I love those locks on you.

You're black!

THEY CHUCKLE

Oh, my gosh. Wait, sorry.

What are you even doing here? Oh, I'm just...

I'm on, like, an exchange student sort of thing.

Although I didn't...

I didn't really realise it was going to be this melanin deficient,

you know.

Um, sorry, I'm Devonye.

I'm Leah. Um, so, what,

do you normally go to, like, private schools, like, back in the US?

Yeah, yeah, but just on scholarships like you.

Oh, nice. I've never, I've never been anywhere this fancy before.

Yeah, no, I'm still getting used to that.

MABEL CLEARS THROAT Like, it's mad. Oh, this is Mabel.

Hi.

Hi. Hi. Oh, my God, I love your freckles.

Oh.

Yeah, like, I could just,

like, pick 'em off and wear 'em as sequins, you know.

OK.

OK, weird.

AWKWARD LAUGHTER

SCHOOL BELL RINGS

Oh, that's the school bell,

which means that you should probably take your seat.

MABEL CHUCKLES

Um, I think there's some empty seats over there,

on the other side of the room.

Oh, cool, yeah.

Awesome, well, I'll see y'all around then.

I'll see you around, babe.

See ya.

See y'all later.

I'm American. So American...

OK, Mabel, stop it.

Oh, my God, she's nice, like, what?

MABEL SUCKS THROUGH HER TEETH

What was that? Did you just...?

Don't, don't do that again.

But I had it that time. No, mm, no.

Mm-mm.

Mm.

Also, we need to talk about the black emojis thing.

Oh, is that a no? No.

Should I just use the yellow ones?

Exactly.

Not getting that many likes?

You really like to think you're the only person with problems,

don't you? Only the real ones.

Just because my houses are bigger than yours

doesn't mean everything's perfect, Jaheim.

Oh, more money, more problems, right? Hmm.

And how are your problems?

Shouldn't you be kissing arse to save your scholarship?

Ha-ha! So, you got jokes now, huh? Mm.

Speaking of jokes, where's, uh, where's Rupert?

On work experience.

During term time?

In term time.

OK.

Well, got to find something to do for free period, do you?

I've got to study. So...

Have fun.

WHISPERS TO HIMSELF

LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CONVERSATION

Right, right, right, you get those.

Yes, check the supplies.

You shall be bestowed...

What's with all the condoms?

It's for tomorrow night.

It's this, um, new society that we signed up for.

Aah. Mm. The bumming society?

Ah, ah, au contraire, mon ami, non.

We shall be dabbling in a spot of the...

..dramatics.

I didn't take you lot for thespians.

Darling, I just want to climb upon these racks.

Have a look at this, Femi.

Yeah.

This is the new dramaturg, OK.

She's a writer-in-residence and she's,

like, at St Gilbert's to inspire her next theatrical piece.

And the Guardian said she's Britain's most urgent playwright.

And guess what?

I most urgently need to get into her panties.

THEY CHUCKLE

Come on, you should come.

Oh, I can't do that kind of stuff right now.

Don't be a killjoy, mate.

I thought you guys would have been used to leaving me behind anyway.

Kind of like how you did over the holidays.

That's where you got the matching jewellery, right?

Well, you were invited skiing.

Yeah, don't be narked with us because you couldn't afford it.

OK, Graham, that's, that's enough.

No, all you had to pay for was the flight and you couldn't.

You're poor, mate.

Get over it.

We have.

God, no!

Hm.

Just, I—I need to go catch up with the boys,

so I should probably do that, yeah?

See you later, yeah? Yeah, yeah.

OK, I got some croissants

and some nuts.

You're not allergic to nuts, are you?

Mabel, it's a protest, not a picnic.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, look. Here comes little Miss Beg Friend.

Hey, thank you for coming.

Yeah, anything to support.

Nice.

So, where's everyone else?

This is it.

Oh.

Miss Dulverton.

Acting headmistress.

The Afro-Caribbean Society.

Problem? Absolutely not.

However, St Gilbert's is a community

and it's vital everyone feels included.

As much as I'd love for us

to all sing Kumbaya, I ain't really feeling what you're feeling.

If you could all pack up your belongings,

today's event is cancelled.

Mm.

Shutting down the one society that looks different to the status quo

seems pretty divisive to me.

Not the society, just whatever this event is.

And until you can prove yourself to be a true team player,

you will be stepping down as chair.

Oh, and I may be acting head now,

but I have several board members in favour of my permanent appointment.

Just something to bear in mind.

Have a lovely evening.

Shit.

No. No, no, no.

You need to chill.

I'm just going to talk to her.

No, you're not, OK, you're angry.

Do I look angry? Yes.

And it's fine. We just need to... just channel that anger.

Channel it into what? She just shut down my whole thing.

Does it matter? There's no-one here, anyway.

What you got going on is cute.

Cute? Cute.

Which is not the vibe when she's trying to stop you from saying

and doing shit.

I mean, she's fighting dirty.

So, you need to show her that petty is a two-player game.

Look, you can take her down, but you need an army.

And the only way to get that army is if you show them

that you's a fucking leader, girl.

I'm listening.

RING TONE

PHONE RINGS

What you saying?

Oh, so now you care.

Watch your tone, bro.

Where are you? Bro, why aren't you at school?

Lights are out.

Couldn't do my homework.

I ain't trying to get shouted at at school.

Listen, I'm going to sort it out with Malachi, yeah.

I promise.

Now, you do something for me and go to school, please.

Yeah, when you get the lights on.

Caleb.

HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYS

KNOCK AT DOOR

Hey.

So...

So.

So, so...

So.

So, so, so, so...

..so.

It's OK.

Are you OK? Um...

Uh, I'm nervous.

Oh.

That wasn't the reaction I was expecting.

No. Um...

..I was gonna say the same thing.

I'm...

..scared as hell.

I guess we can be scared together.

Yeah.

Um...

I...I need to use the bathroom real quickly.

Yep. OK. OK. Um...

Yeah, I'll...I'll see you in a minute.

Please, please, please, please, please. Oh...!

This is what I have to do.

Sweet Jesus, baby.

Phew.

DOOR CREAKS

Hello?

KNOCK AT DOOR Yeah?

What you doing? Uh, working.

Well, aren't you the goody two-shoes?

Ooh, how about we don't touch that?

It's for biology, and if Carol has her way,

then I won't be here next term, so...

I know that feeling.

I think my dad has stopped giving my mum money.

She says that he hasn't, but now the finance department

is emailing me, asking why she's stopped responding to their letters.

I think I am well and truly screwed.

PHONE CHIMES

Jaheim? What? You could say something.

Mm.

What's this? Who's it from?

You're a bit nosy today, aren't you?

I'm not nosy, I'm just curious.

You OK? Good.

Are you sure? What's up?

Just wanted to hang.

Sorry, Xiang's coming back in a bit, so...

Well, we don't have to shag.

Well, what are you doing here, then?

Look, um, I didn't mean that. I think I'm just gonna go.

HE GRUNTS

HE SIGHS

Hello?

This is weird.

Drop your pants and assume the position against the wall.

Sorry, what? Every new Raisinette must receive the initiation paddles.

I've come too far to back out now.

Oh, God no, sorry, I was, I was just fucking with you.

Wow, you really want to be a Raisinette.

It's... Um... ..it's OK, I won't tell anyone.

Pop on your cloak and mask and follow me.

But what is this place?

It was a munitions storage during the Second World War.

Now, it's the Walls of Smut.

Every secret, every private conversation,

every truth that is scared to be uttered

that takes place at St Gilbert's is etched onto these walls.

What secret will you add to the wall?

Oh, I don't think I will.

Everyone has to add to the wall.

But I don't know any secrets.

I wouldn't let anyone else hear you say that.

You'd better find some out soon or you're screwed.

Wait, what, what do you mean by that?

You don't want to know.

Trust me.

Wait, is...

..is that Dilton?

Yeah. Hilarious, right?

But it's not true, though, right?

Of course it's true. It's the Wall of Truth.

Yelena, I need to change to a forward.

I have my forwards. Change me out for Parker.

She was dogshit last term, and you know it. Hmm?

No offence, Parker.

Why? The sports bursary is up for grabs, right?

Forwards score goals, goals get attention.

I'll think about it.

Wh...what is there to think about? Yelena!

One less eardrum, thank you, Beatrix.

What's wrong with Bea?

Jaheim, ooh-ooh.

But they were so cute together.

Oh, my God, I have other problems aside from Jaheim.

Of course, but you were cute together,

and now I am really sad for you.

Aw. There's nothing to be sad about.

There was a spark and now there's not.

No love lost.

What are you girls yapping on about?

Jaheim couldn't get Beatrix to spark.

THEY LAUGH

We have a game.

I know, Yelena.

If you want the bursary, take your mind off of genitals

and keep it on the game.

Everyone, kit up.

Come on!

I'll be your boyfriend, Beatrix.

Sorry. Oops, don't mind me.

Just heading from class to class.

I like to see how everything is running.

Ooh, full hands, shall I take that for you?

Thank you.

Good luck.

Sorry, mate. I think you dropped something.

CLASS GIGGLES

Anybody want to tell me what's going on?

Um, nothing.

Well, not nothing.

People are saying you couldn't get it up with Beatrix.

Uh...

Minor though, innit?

Fuck my life.

Right, presentation day.

Who shall start? Um...

OK, um, Marsham comma Jaheim.

Give him a round of applause.

Woo!

Lungs do more than just the simple intake of oxygen

and expelling of carbon dioxide.

They also are a filtration system.

The mucus in the lungs, they, um...

PHONE BUZZES, PUPILS LAUGH

Sorry. Sorry, sir.

All right, everyone, settle down. Quiet.

Turn it off.

We're waiting.

Yeah, Marsham. It's really not that...hard.

HE COUGHS, OTHERS LAUGH

All right, all right, settle down.

You're going to have to... Sorry, this is really important, sir.

Hello. Marsham. Marsham? I'll call you back.

Marsham! Just keep your phone on and just wait, yeah? Please.

Uh, do you know what, sir? I think I'll go next.

Yeah, I've been using a virtual dissection software,

basically, to help me study the anatomy of rodents.

So, uh, hope no-one's scared of rats!

Undumpable by Moonchild Sanelly

Ew.

Ew!

Ew.

Ew.

Just apologise, Abby.

MESSAGE SENDS

A, um...

A major religious movement in the...

..17th century?

16th. 16th. 16th century.

That led to, um...

Ah! Ah.

The divide of Christianity in Western Europe.

We've gone over this, my brother. I know, and I know it.

It's the same crap we did in the exams to get in here.

I'm, uh, I'm just...

I'm always just... Ugh!

Stop panicking.

You're so uptight.

I can hear your bum cheeks clenching from here.

Yeah, I know. I can't help it.

I'm always feeling like people are surprised that I'm here.

Yeah. We are, bro.

Cos of how you move, innit?

And stop caring about what other people think, I've told you this.

The sooner you do that, the sooner I get to go back to my rahtid room.

You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right.

OK, um...

Next one. Yeah.

Oh, it's, uh, 16th century, you was...

CAMERA SNAPS

MESSAGE TONE

I'm going to teach you some breathing exercises

when I get back, yeah? You just keep reading.

I'll be back in ten.

Who am I kidding? Five.

Look, we've got a whole term together,

we can't keep on living like this.

Listen, yeah, did I like your dad? No.

Was he a prick? Yeah.

Probably still is. Well, this is a great start.

Let me land.

When I trashed the portrait last time,

I genuinely thought I'd be the one going home.

Not your dad.

I swear.

And I wanted to send "hey" so many times.

Well, I was hoping you would.

Come here. I'm so sorry!

Oh, what's with the balaclavas?

If Carol's planning to stay,

I need to figure out a way to force her to leave.

No. My dad will be back.

This is all just a formality. I don't think so.

Carol's saying that she's got board members on side and everything.

Bullshit.

She sounded pretty confident to me.

Dad...

Weh Bruk A Go by Mr Vegas

TEXT MESSAGE

Close the door, bruv!

Yo, it's Toby here.

Don't leave a message cause I get charged for voicemails.

You said you'll be ten minutes.

If you think I'm a lost cause,

it would be nice if you just were honest about it.

Hello. My name is Miss Bradshaw,

but you can call me Jude.

Uh, "Ms" Bradshaw, so you're not, you're not married?

No, why?

It's just very good to know, Jude.

SNIGGERING

Yeah.

Would you like to come in?

The reason we can drop the airs and graces is because I'm not a teacher.

I am a writer in residence and I am hoping to create

stories from your experiences that we will stage together.

Whatever those experiences may be.

Why don't we start with a game? A bit of improv.

Any volunteers?

Do you know what? Toes actually loves improv. I'll be gentle!

What's your name? Femi.

Femi, would you like to come up here?

OK, can someone give me a location?

A bedroom!

And, um, our relationship?

Uh, husband and wife.

And a scenario?

Oh, um, it's your wedding night.

THEY SNIGGER

OK.

What a night.

It was great.

So much dancing.

What was your favourite part?

The first dance.

I'm glad to be back in our room.

I was thinking about us starting a family.

Me too.

Can you help me with my dress?

What now?

Now...

..we fuck.

SHOCKED LAUGHTER

Oh, my God!

Do you want to say that a bit louder?

No.

Thanks for joining us. You can go now.

Yeah, maybe you lot should join him?

Yep, yeah, that's OK.

Pleasure.

Love your work, big fan. Thank you very much.

Femi, what the hell was that?

I love this new Femi.

Mwah! Let's go! Let's go!

LAUGHTER

Let's get smashed!

Didn't see you at dinner so I brought you this.

Thank you.

Just so you know,

I didn't spread those rumours.

Everybody thinks I can't get it up now, so...

Couldn't be further from the truth.

Look, all I said to the girls is that we aren't...

..vibing.

I thought we were.

Take away us sleeping together and what is there?

I didn't know we were there.

I didn't say we were.

It's just...

I want to spend time with somebody who wants to do more than just shag.

All I know about you is that your name is Jaheim

and you love black pepper.

Well, um...

I'm just, I'm just going through some shit.

You can talk to me. I'm here.

OK.

Damn, damn, damn, I forgot the balaclavas.

Too late, come on. OK.

Graham. Oh.

Is it going to hurt?

Of course it's going to hurt,

we're going to jab a safety pin through your ear.

Come on.

You ready?

I was born ready.

I got this from Annabel.

You...you guys have studs.

Darling, we'll get you a stud.

It's just, um, temp.

Yeah? OK.

Oh, that is good.

Ready?

Turn this on...

Bite down on this. Trust me.

One, two, three...!

FEMI GROANS

OK, Femi, relax.

Calm down, calm down.

Relax. Shit.

Shit! Shit, shit, fuck!

Sh-sh-sh-sh, sh-sh, OK, we can't be too loud.

OK, good job. Is it supposed to sting like this?

I don't know, mate, we got ours done professionally, so...

Oh, you wallads.

No regrets.

Ha!

CAR ALARM

Brrap, braap!

Can we go somewhere next holiday, like, the four of us?

Yeah, look, right, I'll pay.

Or we'll do something cheap, like Alton Towers or something.

Look, look, but we've got to promise.

Earrings together, tattoos together, mates forever.

Whoo!

Go, go!

I got my fucking ear pierced, man.

HE CACKLES

Femi, what are you doing, bruv?

Oh, calm down, Dad. I'm just having fun.

Oh, fun? Fun.

Brother, you're worried about getting kicked out, yeah?

This is how you do it, you know. Yeah, well, I'm already out.

You don't know that yet. Of course I do.

I'm the weakest out of the lot of us.

I'm, I'm fucked.

I might as well enjoy my time whilst I'm here.

You know, go out like a legend.

Have something for my friends to remember me by.

Brother, they ain't your friends.

And you are?

Big man, I'm sorry I bailed on you, innit?

It's fine, it's fine, it's fine... Bro, listen, I went to link Abby...

I'm not surprised.

Everyone hates me.

It's my fault.

I pushed you all away.

Lay in the bed that you made, right?

Tobes, Tobe...

Femi.

I'll see you later. Let me chat to you. Toby!

Femi. Don't chat to me, man.

What do I pay you for?

I'm going to get it cleaned up.

And as we speak,

I'm having the CCTV footage downloaded onto a USB.

So, uh, we're going to get it cleaned straight away, Carol.

And, um, I'm going to get it sorted.

I'm going to get to the bottom of it, Carol.

I can promise you that much, I...

I love you, Carol.

Toby, hey. Hello.

You seen what's happened to Carol's car? Yeah, LOL.

Look, I'm sorry about yesterday.

Something important came up.

Yeah, well, we've all got important stuff going on, Abby.

Wow, someone's sensitive.

Maybe because I let people down

so I could be stood up in the toilet like a dickhead.

Well, it's simple, don't let people down for a quickie.

Well, I thought it was more than just a quick...

I mean, yeah.

I guess I did.

I don't know why.

Not like it would have been worth it.

KNOCKING Yeah? Ah.

Settling in to your new office?

Mistress. Oh, stop it.

You can call me Carol.

We missed you over the holidays.

Not so much as a phone call.

I know. We got stuck in a tiny, tiny village north of Bordeaux.

Terrible phone signals.

Just a bit of homework to take to Rupert.

Carol...

Rupert and I are not really...

Rupert is struggling, Florence.

He's not doing particularly well at the moment and...

..I just need you to be there for him.

What have you been saying to people?

He's on work experience.

Oh, my star head girl.

Mwah!

You still thinking about Cambridge summer school?

Yes, mistress. Carol.

Well, do come and find me when you need a reference.

That's an order.

Next time, I won't be giving it back.

PHONE BUZZES

Man like J. Bro, where have you been?

Now, look, man, you know I wouldn't have disappeared unless I had to.

I'll explain everything when I get to you.

You're mad right now.

Wait, what? You're coming here?

Right, look, J, I've got to go, yeah?

In a bit.

Malachi.

Hi, J. Sorry for rocking up like this, bro.

It's calm.

You good? Always.

What are you doing here?

Let's talk about it inside, innit?

Welcome, everyone.

Places, places, big smiles!

Less teeth. Much less teeth.

They are on to me, man.

I've just got to lay low elsewhere, you hear me?

Move, bruv!

Cryyyy.

Dev is cool. I just don't think she's being completely honest.

You know it's OK just to tell her you like her. Who?

You lot just love playing games with each other.

Aaah!

I thought you were so over him.

I think he still likes me.

Well, this is exciting.

I'll tell your father to book you a ticket to Lagos.

I'm trying, Jaheim. Mother's intuition finally kicked in?

Can anybody help me?

This was a warning.