Original subtitles

This gentleman needs to know, will it go up a hill? Of course it will. It's

taken me and Alan and my dog for a little rampage. Yeah, but have you got

hillage in your area?

No. I'm just guessing.

Do you want to get in the back? If it'll pull you and Alan... Yeah, but it's got

to go up the hillage.

Yeah, but if it'll pull you and him on the flat, it'll go up a hill, won't it?

My name is Henry Cole, and I'm a junkaholic.

Better get wheeling and dealing.

Together with me three mates, top restorers, Alan Milliard.

Yes!

Guy Willison. I'm like a coiled spring.

And Sam Lovegrove.

We've been rummaging our way through Britain's sheds. Wow.

Farm sales, auctions and jumbles for automotive treasures.

Oh, my Lord, look at that.

To buy, do up. That's just lovely. And sell on for a tidy profit.

75 quid.

But it's time to take a look back at the best bit of our lives as the four

junketeers. Okay, that's enough of that.

Is indicating left.

Taking in the good. Now that is proper cool.

The bad and the ugly.

All for one and one for all.

This is the Junk and Disorderly retrospective.

Junk and Disorderly.

Hey, well, welcome to Junk and Disorderly Best Bits. And, well, I'm

the legend that is Skid Willison. And the icon, shall we call you that?

I think that's fair enough. I think it is. Mr.

Alan Milliard.

Do you know, I was just thinking, because we're just about to go and visit

Dave up in Birmingham area in the shed, right?

There are some rules of engagement with sheds, right?

Because, look, lots of people come into your house, don't they? You haven't

necessarily invited them.

Right? But in a shed, right, it's by invite only.

And you know they're going to be a kindred spirit.

Or you hope they are.

Yes. Now, I really do believe that a shed should not be part of the house, if

you see what I mean. I think you've got to walk out, yeah, down the gravel to

the shed. And the other thing I would say is if you put a bed in a shed, then

it's a spare room.

I've fallen asleep in my shed before. So have I. I ain't laying there pondering

on a problem. You wake up, it's four o 'clock in the morning.

Tracy was thinking, probably, thank God, he's asleep in the shed. Brilliant.

I'll have the whole bed to meself.

Yes. Hey, so today, right, we will be ending up at Sammy Miller's auto jumble

the end of the show. But first, we've got to get some trinket tree.

And what better way to start than visiting our Dave near Birmingham in,

BGU shed.

You know why we're here, obviously. We need to acquire some trinket tree. Okay.

And I think we may well have come to the right place. Yes.

You know what I mean? So how long have you been collecting? Since you were a

kid? Since I was a kid, yeah. Really? I'm 75 now.

No. Yeah, yeah. Are you? And I'm still at it.

Blimey. But you look much younger than him. Oh, thank you, Sir Henry. Yeah.

You look older than him.

Go on, mate. Shake a leg. Yeah,

cheers, Dave. All right, we'll see you in a bit. Okay, buddy. Lovely tea, by

way.

Straight away, it's obvious we've come to the right place. Talk about a

collection. This is a cornucopia. Look at it.

Oh, my God.

Cans and trinket tree gone mad.

I'm sure he won't sell his showcase items, but there's always something.

Oh, hang on.

What do you reckon on that lot?

Could his leftover be our main course?

Dave? Lucky you don't, mate. I'm in awe of all these cans, but I'm guessing this

basket may well have been set aside.

Oh, that's for sale in there, yeah.

What would you reckon for this lot plus the singer oil?

You make me an offer.

A sensible offer.

60 quid the lot?

Uh... For the tenner?

All right, then.

I think it's about right. Thank you.

So we're off to the races.

Looking round, he's got some amazing motoring ephemera.

Look at that.

Patch quick specialties. I'm in heaven.

But there are also some larger items, like this intriguing looking bike.

Is it a 350?

No, it's a 500.

TRW.

Bobber. Side valve.

Bobber, sprinter.

This one's been heavily modified and looks great.

No exhaust?

No. No, you need an exhaust system.

And what else needs finishing? A chain.

OK, well, I think that's pretty easy.

Sure, it's a work in progress. Put together by Dave and his son, Simon. But

isn't it glorious?

And so, is this the sale? Oh, yes.

Tempting, but it's not the only bike.

Behind Guy, there is...

What looks like a board tracker there.

That's right. Tell me about that.

It was a BSA bicycle.

I've always wanted a board racer. Obviously can't afford one. So I

make one.

It's just a bit of shed art. It doesn't run.

What's the OBIAS? It's the old bloke in the shed.

Oh, I like it. Yeah, that is cool. We need a T -shirt.

And talking of brand names, Dave's got a wonderful RAC illuminated sign,

restored by his son.

We've got our little triumphant bobber here. How much would that be?

I want you three and a half, but I'm open to offers.

And the RAC sign behind Guy?

It's 850 or near offers.

And, um, I've got to ask.

Go on.

The patch quick.

That was 1 ,500 or offers.

What about...

Three and a half for the bike and the RAC sign.

No, then enough, mate. Okay.

Three, seven, a pair?

I'll go for that. Yeah? Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Shake hands. Thank you. Well done, mate. I think that's a good deal

because everyone's happy. Are you happy?

I certainly am. As for the patch, quick.

Grand. Again, too cheap.

How much?

Twelve hundred.

Thank you, Henry.

I'm so chuffed, but I am feeling unusual. I need to go and lie down.

Can I tell you, he's not often like that.

Really? Yeah.

Dave's shed.

Man, small but perfect. It was a wonderful shed, that was. Some of the

had, that Triumph Bobber, I mean, the colour of that and the look of it, it

just right, wasn't it? Side valve, Triumph engine.

Absolutely lovely.

That RAC sign was nice.

Beautiful. That was beautiful. Quality, yes. That was good. And that patch quick

cabinet display.

I was shocked at how much money that was. I'm not saying it wasn't worth it.

I'm surprised you stumped up that much, knowing you, because you'd normally like

short arms, deep pockets. Oh, don't be like that.

Look, when you find something really good, you've got to make an allowance.

Yeah. Definitely.

There was a board tracker.

sort of hanging up in Dave's shed, Al. And it had O -B -I -A -S.

Obias.

Obias. Yeah, Obias. Do you know what that means? No idea.

Old bloke in a shed.

Well, that's three old blokes in a shed who need to restore some stuff.

Right, now, Skid, you are now administering help to the rear end. I'm

I'm happiest doing, restyling me.

You know me, I like a restyle. What I was thinking of doing is re -bending

so that the number plate is kind of here. Look.

We try out a more modern option, but it gets the thumbs down.

There's only a bit of chrome on the bike.

So Skid reworks the old one while Alan starts on the wiring.

I can feel the price of the bomb, it's just rising.

Eh?

Actually, on second thought, he might be devaluing it slightly.

He drills a new hole in the mudguard, and then, while Alan works on the

electrical spaghetti, Skid reattaches the bracket.

And finally, the light, just in time for my return.

Now then.

I've cleaned the points, found a couple of broken wires which were fixed.

I've redone the timing.

Everything seems like it should go, so hopefully it will actually start.

Right.

Excellent news. We're looking forward to it.

Can I just comment on that?

Yes, you've done a great job on that, hasn't you? I think that... It looks

nicer when I jump on the bike now. It doesn't catch my leg.

Talking of which... OK, let the dog see the rabbit.

50 -50 chance it's going to work.

All right, I'll take the 50.

Glass is half full.

Sparked? Yes.

Uh -oh.

That sounds amazing.

That is just... It's been thick.

That's fuel.

Yeah, yeah, I thought it was.

That's actually fine.

Though a leak we need to fix.

But Alan's not unduly worried.

Hey, this is fantastic news.

Alan has just tripled the value of the motorcycle.

Next morning, and the good news is the spares have just arrived.

Look what Henny's got. And also, can I point out, to go with your shiny

the beautiful mudguard that's nearly fitted.

That is an abomination.

True, it came with the bike, but that's no reason to keep it.

So am I taking it off, then, please?

Okay, so we're fixing the exhaust and taking a beautifully styled mudguard

Yes. Right, okay.

And we've also got a rather nice leak on the carburettor. And we've also got to

strip the carb. Okay, let's get on with it. Top -top job.

While I redesign the front end, Alan

starts on the leaky carburettor.

And Guy fits the chain.

As they soon discover, our Triumph does have a few eccentricities.

It's got a condenser bolt into the carburettor.

Oh, what's that about?

I've no idea.

Hey, Al, check this out.

I know why it hasn't had a chain on it.

There's a nut stuck to the sprocket. Can you see where the chain's been rubbing

on it?

So that was jammed on the tooth?

Yeah.

So that's why it had no chain on.

And talking of nuts, can I just amuse you slightly with my new toy?

It's my latest gizmo, a magnetic sweeper. I have accidentally on purpose,

dropped a few bolts and nuts and things.

Right. So what you do, if you just run along here, the area that you thought, I

don't know how to open the pole to make it longer, because it's that new.

Here you go, so you go like that.

It's a great idea, poorly executed.

Nothing there.

Oh, thanks.

That's great. I can now do it without a hunchback.

That's funny, isn't it? The main challenge, though, is the carburettor.

Alan quickly spots something.

The float's not been put on right. The float should be on that pin here, like

that. And it wasn't.

So that's the problem.

The float is vital to regulate the flow of fuel, but it needs to be precisely

fitted.

Quite good news.

What? The float wasn't engaged with its pivot. And one pivot was engaged and one

wasn't. So the float would have worked initially, then tipped across an angle

and jammed, and that's why it flooded.

So hopefully, fingers crossed, we should be perfect.

Whilst Skid finishes the chain.

Back in the shed, Alan does the business, carefully refitting the two

hold the float in place.

Then he replums the whole carb back onto the bike before moving on to attaching

the exhaust.

And that looks quite a straightforward fit, but that's from me here with my

team.

This arrangement, with one short and one much longer pipe wrapped around the

engine, is called a Siamese exhaust system.

Ten minutes later, it's done.

Here we go.

I'm all excited.

It sounds a bit agricultural, which is not surprising, because these engines

were originally built for farm generators.

But what a thrill!

Sounds really good, doesn't it? It's not loud. They fuffle rather than spit. I

love a fuffle. You know, I've always loved a fuffle. Oh, boy, how fantastic

that?

So here we go on what may very well be this bike's maiden ride.

Oh, right.

Power delivery's pretty smooth.

But just the weight of it...

And the size of it all round, it feels kind of 350.

But within a few miles, I'm really settling into it.

Now, interestingly, you spend a lot of time with that bobber with the

carburettor. The carburettor looked brand new, so you've got to look at it

first and think of what it needs doing.

When I took off the float bowl, the float itself wasn't put in properly. It

not engaged on its pivots.

But I have to tell you, that little bobber did ride really nicely, you know?

engine's very tractable.

Sidebar engine, very tractable at low speed.

A very straightforward restoration. What was it?

Carburettor. Well, we've been there before.

Exhaust. Do the points.

Remount the rear light because it was a bit sticky -uppy. Yeah, yeah.

And then it rode beautifully.

I mean, I don't know about you, but I mean, I love bobbers because I love the

simplicity of them. Especially with no front mudguard. It's a bobber.

You can't have a mudguard on the front. Yeah, but it does rain in England.

Yeah, I know, but at the same time, if it rains in England, you're not going to

be taking that bobber out, are you? Well, I would. No, you're going to be

as pan -European. There's lots of mess on the road as well, isn't there? I

it's nice and sunny.

You run over some inclement mess with a strap in your face.

Yeah, exactly.

If there's been a horse up the lane before you, you're in big trouble. No,

so now you're saying that if you don't have a front mudguard, you're going to

get a plume of water in your face. Yes. But if you put a bandana across the

forks... Yeah.

That doesn't work. That's a wives' tale. A bandana across the forks doesn't. I'm

with you. I like a fully formed, nice mudguard on the front. Oh, yeah, OK.

Can I just draw your attention to these two chops here? They don't have front

mudguards either.

You don't ride them in the rain, though?

You don't ride them at all.

These could be wall art.

Hey, look, we're taking a break.

I'll have a go at these two. All right.

Okay, so we've got that straight.

I've ridden that one at least twice, and I've ridden that one once. I admit,

okay? I do admit it. You're right.

I'm wrong. They are garage queens.

Okay, we've got that sorted out. Yeah?

Very pretty garage queens. Good. All right. Very pretty garage queens. I

you've ridden that one more than once.

You have. I've ridden it twice.

let's cut this out okay yeah all right fine okay so look so we went to dave's

shed happy days got some nice gear right time now to do a bit of auctioning

it all comes from one man's collection a certain mr neville pew

look i've just walked into the room That's what I've just come up.

124, an AJS motorcycle scroll enamel sign.

The estimate was £600 to £800.

Including commissions, it's just gone for nearly £9 ,000.

Do I stand a chance today?

Not really.

This auction has been eagerly awaited.

There are bids coming in online and over the phone, and, as well as regular

punters, I've got to compete with professional dealers like my mates, Doug

Matt.

Doug, the prices today, man, are going crazy. Why is that?

It's just a good collection. It's the hype. It's the fighting.

Finding this much in one go doesn't happen that often.

I'm going to bind your hands round your chest like that, eh?

The prices really are steeper than the north face of the Eiger, but rest

assured, I didn't come here to watch the other climbers.

OK, we're going to have a go at the next lot, which is 282. My concern, though,

is that the trade is standing behind me.

Over the next 20 minutes, I raise my hand more times than the cloth. What?

I get a selection of grinding paste tins.

An RAC sign on Matt and Doug's advice.

Happy days. And another box of tins.

I think I've bought about 384 tins now.

All we need now is a petrol pump.

Not 325, it's pump time.

Starting price, 400 quid. That BP belly pump.

650 bucks.

Online bill, 650.

I'm joining, I'm joining.

How can he not see me?

I'm dancing, man.

Here we go, here we go, here we go.

Oh, yes.

That's the one I wanted, baby.

Oh, man.

Now I'm back at base, hoping that everyone will be suitably impressed.

Small items like this will go down a treat at next weekend's jumble, but the

petrol pump is just too big, so we need a plan B.

Now, they used to be called Fat Ladies.

You can see why, can't you? You can see, because there's sort of bulbous in the

middle. I'll tell you what.

I

think

you're better off calling it Fat Henry's.

Yeah. Don't you? I think so. But I actually call them belly pumps, yeah?

obviously all the mechanism was in there to pump your fuel, but you had this

long pole here which you put your glass globe on. Oh, the globe's on the top.

Yeah, to attract the punters. Yeah, got you. Now, it just so happens I have a BP

glass globe. I somehow thought you might. Yeah.

Well, look, let's get restoring the Fat Henry.

Before we can do any repainting, task number one is to strip and clean the

exterior.

Now this will have to be very carefully placed in the skid.

There's more grime on this pump than a dizzy rascal LP, but the jet wash makes

swift work of it.

Alan meanwhile starts on the gauge with a soft brass brush to avoid damaging the

surface.

Getting soaked over here.

While the belly pump is drying, Alan moves on to the brassware, using a mop

buff up the Gilbarco logo and the fittings on the gauge.

Then, after masking off the glass, he starts spraying the surround.

To cut the tape off thin, like that.

Yeah. Use that thin edge so you can bend it round the curve.

That's beautiful.

We're spraying it British Racing Green, a colour which should really be called

Irish Racing Green, because it was adopted for the 1903 Gordon Bennett Cup,

which was held on the Emerald Isle.

The British entrance chose green for their cars as a sign of respect to their

shamrock -loving hosts.

For the interior, we're going battleship grey.

Yeah, I think that's lovely. I think the contrast is great.

It's grey, isn't it?

Contrast is grey -ter.

Great.

Is that a joke?

Sort of, yeah. Oh, grey -ter.

Don't give up your day job, Alan.

Once the top's been painted, Alan refits the gauge, our beautiful brass logo,

and the doors, or so -called shelves, on the outside of the pump.

That looks proper nice. It looks like it's old.

As for the hose, I fit a new, old model.

Are you twisting as well?

Yeah. The yard is inserting, and I'm twisting.

Stiff all the way.

Stiff all the way at 61.

It's not 61 yet.

August is 61.

We've got about nine weeks to go yet.

As a finishing touch, I add a beautiful brass nozzle.

And then the icing on the cake is an original globe. That looks amazing.

Right?

With the original stickers. Now then, that's the side we want. That matches

plane perfectly, doesn't it? Right?

There we go. It does need a quick dab of soap and water, but an original glass

will definitely add value.

Once it's dry, the glass takes pole position.

And then, after a little fiddle, we stand back.

Shall I spark it? Do it, let's see if it works.

Against that black cloud.

Are you ready?

Yeah, push it in, let's see.

Wow! That is proper cool.

Now that is proper cool.

Show it against the black cloud, it's brilliant.

Oh gosh, that's fantastic!

Now, you may be wondering what is behind Guy's head.

And yes, it is the pump that we restored and sold for 1 ,500 quid.

But can I discuss Guy's wiring?

Because... Hang on, don't blame me for this. I am. For the loss of the sale.

no, I'm going to. Sometimes sales just go wrong. Yeah. It's not always related

to my wiring. This was.

We have this philosophy, don't we, of a 10 -minute warranty.

So consequently, if you buy a drive bomber from us or whatever, you've got

minutes to bring it back. But actually, in reality, we'll kind of look after

you, won't we? Yeah. Especially kindred spirits.

Of course. We always will. If someone comes back to you and says, can I have

money back?

You have to do that.

And you were quite glad to see it come back. You weren't sure about selling it

in the first place. Absolutely.

I mean, look at all the pumps.

You know? I just love them. I live for petrol pumps.

That's a bit odd, isn't it? I know. You'd think you'd grow out of it,

you, Al? You know, I get really, really excited by petrol pumps. Why?

Because, like, look at that National Benzol there. Do you know what I mean?

just looks great, man.

Just sets off your collection of motorbikes or e -cars.

Absolutely. I mean, look at this place. It's fantastic.

Hey, look, okay, so this is the time in a show, always, where we have an item or

items that we don't know what they are, right? Or one of us does, and the other

two have to guess.

So, here we go, then.

I have here a pair of, they are called rabbit ears.

Not a movie projector.

No, it's not a movie projector. I know exactly what they are because I've hung

out with you for too long. Okay, when we come back, Guy will enlighten us.

Hey, welcome back to Junk and Disorderly Best Pits. Now, before the break, I

asked you to guess what these two little babies are for.

They're called rabbit ears, but Guy reckons he knows what they're for. Guy.

I know what they're for, because when you're restoring stuff, you always get

challenges, and the challenge you set was to do a helicopter, and they're off

the helicopter.

I don't quite understand what they do, but they're on the bit that goes round

with the blade.

Okay, so basically they are on top of the helicopter blades, right, right in

middle of the main shaft, right, on top of the main shaft.

But these are on springs.

And so consequently, when the helicopter is at rest, they're up like this and

they stop the blades wobbling around. Harmonic vibration. So imagine the wind

and all that kind of stuff. That's what it's for, isn't it? Yeah. And then when

the blades start, they go down like that.

on springs just because of the i guess kinetic energy centrifugal centrifugal

force yeah so they are obsolete in flight but when it comes down lands and

you're worried about perhaps the blades catching wind or something these things

like that and they stop with their weights on is that the lesson over well

thought you might be quite interested he looks interesting harmonics they have

them on power transmission cables as well to talk the wind Fretting the

There you go, you see. You'll see them on transmission cables as well. I'm not

restoring transmission cables.

Quite a lot of voltage through there. No, look. Can I just... Wait a second.

right. This is what happens in a shed. You start dribbling on about nothing for

hours. I know.

Pop calling the kettle noir.

Yeah, yeah. Now, we were going to go to Sammy Miller's for our auto jumble, but

because it's an important show and Sammy Miller himself is a very important

person, we had to prepare properly.

We're still short of smaller items for the jumble, but fear ye not, help is at

hand.

Matt? Hi, Henry, you all right?

Have you come with accoutrement?

Well, I was just passing, so I thought I'd pop in. Right, let's have a look.

Oh, yeah.

So we've got some nice pieces.

Are you interested in these two signs?

And an old castle service sign.

OK, right, well, look, what's that big red thing in there?

That is an oil dispenser or paraffin dispenser.

It's missing the little top piece, but I'm sure you could do something with

that. So, look, how much for the lot?

How about the whole lot?

£320.

£300.

Done. Shake it by the hand.

I think that's great. You've got a bargain there.

Next day, the sun is shining, so in preparation for Saturday's jumble, I

all our recent acquisitions, plus the stuff left from last time.

I've laid it all out, right? Our recent purchase, because I think we need to gee

things up. Now, also, talking about geeing things up, Rupert... Oh, he's

now.

Rupert's an old biking chum. He says he's got some more items for us.

So... Is that it?

Excuse me, are you Henry?

Oh, shush. I heard you could sell anything.

What's that?

I've got a beautiful Acroprovic exhaust.

Off of what?

Well, KTM LT4.

100 quid?

Fine, fine. Is that all right? Yeah, yeah, clears the shed.

We'll take a tenner on it, so it'll be 90.

And what's this tyre?

This is an old hipster tyre. I mean, who puts one of those on the back of their

bike? I do.

It's square.

That was on the back of your BMW Cafe Racer, wasn't it? The Scrambler.

20 quid? 20 quid, yeah. 20 quid. They're about 80 quid new. I won't charge

commission. Whatever.

I'm happy.

Do you want to swap anything? Do you want anything from me? No, look, Rupert.

What? You just walked straight past it. That's you.

Rupert could be perfect to pre -sell the Triumph.

I did see it on the way and it looks quite nice, doesn't it? Have a look. My

last, isn't it? Yes. Of course you are. You're going to own it in a minute.

It suits him, doesn't it? Well, it fits.

I mean, even your Colliber. It's quite nice.

I mean, it suits you, doesn't it?

I think you're old enough for that. We all need a bit of timber.

Yeah, of course, mate. It's a TRW500.

It's very cheap. I think I'm interested.

It's very, very cheap. It's 4 ,250.

You're going to have to wire that up.

You need a real light. No, Chuck. I'll give you three and a half.

No, no, no, three and a half's not enough. You've got to up that.

All you've got to do is rewire, and it's on, mate.

If you ask Alan nicely.

Yeah, I will ask Alan nicely. Come on, four grand, it's a fair price.

Got no oil leaks, no fuel leaks. The battery's charged.

Well, someone sensible said something good about it. Yeah, shake him by the

then. Four grand. Four grand.

Hey, look, this is a result, man.

So even after buying those spares, that's nearly a grand in profit.

Not bad.

Time for a revamp.

I think we need the stall to be more colourful.

Please keep looking at me in the eye.

I think I can definitely improve on those with an airline.

What? It's going to get the dents out?

Put the airline in there and blow the dents out. It'll either blow the dents

or explode it. Or explode the cab. Well, look, it's amazing, isn't it?

Like, 20 years ago, straight in the bin.

Now, on the sale.

Ten quid.

Look, Al, you go off and see what you can do with your exploding cans.

Okay? And then, Gid, you get on the mop and I'll reside here in the sunshine.

First things first, Skid collects his caps and heads back to the polishing

Like birds, we humans are attracted to shiny things, and there's no better way

to get a punter to hand over the cash for a rusty old can than to polish the

cap. It also has the added advantage of keeping Skid occupied while we get on

with the fun stuff.

Is it going to be as easy as just shoving that in?

Well, I've never done this before. It's just sort of a guess. It might work.

Do you want some goggles on?

If you do it very gently, it should be okay.

Look at that!

That's coming.

That's it.

Yeah, Alan!

Look at that!

That's just basically usable, isn't it? Yeah, that's almost there, isn't it? I

mean, it's not 100%, but I mean, whatever is.

It works, doesn't it?

Oh great, we've just got to try that one.

Okay, but look, I'll tell you what though, I'll give that a clean up and we

well be in clover, straight up for a tenner each.

That is how to add value, isn't it? A bit of hot air. A bit of hot air, never

goes amiss.

All I've got left now is to give everything a bit of spit and polish.

A little bit of wood polish, right, on the rag, just there like that, dusting

over the top there.

It's amazing how people will go straight for something that looks polished, get

rid of the dust, and you're halfway there.

And then we'll just give Alan's cans a little squirtage, just to hopefully

up just a little bit.

I mean, I do remember seeing these sort of in bomb sites and things, just

litter. So to actually be cleaning them is really weird.

There you go.

25 quid for the set of three.

Look at it.

It's all about presentation.

So, I think we are ready to jumble.

Nice to see Matt always with a few little trinkets, hey?

Yeah, because he's always got quality stuff. He's always got quality gear.

Yeah. He knows what you want, doesn't he, as well?

Unlike... Rupert. Why do I want an Akrapovic exhaust?

We did sell that. I'm not sure it was at the next jumble, but it did go.

Hey, but he did buy the Triumph, OK? Yeah.

It's all very fine to just put a load of detritus in your van, turn up an auto

jumble... Throw it all out on the ground. And throw it all out on the

But we've learnt, and I've learnt from you guys as well, to prep it.

First impressions when I see it. First impressions.

Well, it just adds value, doesn't it? It's like polishing the caps on the

cans. It doesn't take me long to do one of those. And it just gives it that

little bit of bling and it's got that magpie effect that's shiny.

Of course, it's a flame of me. I mean, I do that.

at jumbles.

You know, if it's shiny and blingy, I'll have a look. And also, like taking out

dents. Taking out dents, yeah. Yeah, yeah. With an air compressor.

Yeah. Which you're really good at and I'm not very good at. It's down to first

impressions. It feels nice and feels smooth. It's good. Absolutely. It's very

easy to do. And enjoyable because you're chatting while you're doing it. Have a

cup of tea.

If the weather's nice, you're outside on a trestled table. I mean, there are

benefits and there are negatives about having you to talk to. Yes, well, you'd

have to talk to me all day. Yeah, I know.

So, well, we're well prepared. up we've got a banging stall all ready for our

Sammy's Auto Jumble.

Hey welcome

back to Junk and Disorderly Best Bits and well we're about to embark on a

trip down to the new forest.

Now, Sammy Miller's auto jumble is always a corker, isn't it? And Sammy

himself is a quite exceptional person. You introduced me to him. I did. He does

press -ups every day. He swims in the sea four days a week. He also rides his

trials bike very regularly, almost every day. Five days a week on the course.

Can I just tell you, Sammy is, I think, the most decorated British sportsman.

I think it's about 1 ,500 trophies.

I mean, the man, as a motorcyclist, was a legend. Yeah, absolutely.

He's a legend. He used to ride his bike from Belfast to Glasgow, Francis

Barnett, then go on a six -day Scottish trial and then ride it back home again.

Newspaper stuff down his jacket, keep warm.

Keep warm. Yeah.

Nice. They don't make them like that. No, they don't make them like that. And

can beat you at press -ups.

Yeah, I've had a couple of goes at press competitions.

I don't say that. I've had a couple of competitions with Sammy on the press up

front, one of which was in the pit lane at Goodwood, actually, in front of about

1 ,000 people.

And yet again, I lost.

But let's hope we're winning at the Jumble.

So the day has finally come to show off our revitalised stall to the world.

We've come to Sammy Miller's place in New Milton.

He's got a fabulous museum full of bikes that he's restored and ridden. And

three times every year, he stages an auto jumble outside to help raise funds.

Very quickly, our stall's looking more jam -packed than a prize -winning

doughnut.

Welcome to the Sammy Miller Museum auto jumble. The sun is shining on the

righteous, and I actually think we might be receiving some wedge.

Straight away, I launch into a ferocious haggle. Love it. It's a pound. No,

what?

Yes.

140 quid.

140? With a whole family of bidders.

80?

I like your style.

That is the way to do it. Haggle like crazy, but 80's a little bit low.

110.

Come on then.

100.

Alright.

After that auspicious opening, things start flying off the stall faster than a

Honda Fireblade.

So 40 it is, mate.

Oh, go on then. Go on then, it's nine.

The big success of the day is, you guessed it, our petrol cans.

50 quid.

I've seen them for 100, you know.

Great. All right.

35.

Yeah, go on then.

35 it is.

Happy days.

Oh, mate, yeah, they're 40 and I will take 35.

I'll pay 40 if you sign it. You've got a deal, I'll get a pen.

We sign them, sell them and shift them by the crate load.

And even more gratifying, the work Skid put into polishing those caps... You've

been polishing them, haven't you? Yeah, I did them yesterday.

It does pay off. Thank you, enjoy.

All righty.

Well, everything's sort of happening pretty quickly, which is fantastic.

The sun is out, the punters are here, lovely people, and it just keeps on

coming, man.

We do also shift some of the bigger items.

£65 a lot. No, no, £60 a lot.

All right.

£55 a lot. No, £60.

£60 a lot.

Yeah, great. All right, lad. Top job.

The Royal Daylight Oil Dispenser, with the missing tab.

That's why the lid was closed.

The great thing about buying something like this is that you now can go round

auto jumble for years looking for the spout thing.

That's part of it. Okay,

so look.

Okay, look.

140?

120? 120?

120 and buy us a cup of tea.

Oh, all right.

Happy days.

Can I just show you something?

Don't, don't... Can I show you something? What a change from the other

Yeah. This is a revelation. It is. I'm going to move into the Fanny Miller

Museum. And me too as well. Oh, yeah. We get repeat customers.

That. Yeah, great, OK.

All right, five of the pair then.

Sell more petrol cans and spread the love.

My missus is obsessed with you.

Oh, my God.

Is she deranged? Yeah, sadly.

She married me, so that's... Oh, yeah, well, she must be, then.

Yeah? Happy days?

Could you sign my letter?

Oh, it'll just devalue it.

Are you sure you want me to do that? Yeah. Things are going so well that when

Sammy turns up at the stall... You'd better have a look round the museum

you go. No, no, I know, but look, it's all hectic at the moment, mate. He still

motorbikes every day.

Over in these woods, yeah.

Do you? Every day?

We obey his command.

Sammy, do you want to sell a grey Fergie? No.

You have to understand, if you don't know or you've never seen Mr Sammy

right, he is a legend. He is the most decorated sportsman in the UK with 1

trophies. He also just happens to be 91 years of age. And also... Nothing.

He restores not one...

Not two, but three motorcycles at a time.

Unbelievable. Come on then, show us. Right.

He's got an aerial square four stripped down to the frame.

We've got all the hubs painted and bearings in them, all faced up,

all ready to go.

A hand -built bike from the 1950s with an early three -cylinder engine.

Three cylinders seem to be a good, smooth...

Compromise for an engine.

But best of all, this Francis Barnett race bike, which ran at Brooklands in

1929. Got no clutch. No clutch.

They didn't use clutches in the early days. No, no.

Just bump start and go.

Out back, there are more bikes waiting to be restored.

But though we could be here all day, business beckons.

Right, OK, look, we'd better get back to the stall. Come on. Right. Honestly. On

the case.

On the case.

On the case.

Well done.

Thank you so much for the little whiz around.

Blimey, he's like a whirling dervish.

And talking about whirling dervishes, back on the stall, Skid's been chalking

the sales.

There you go. Thank you very much.

By the time we come back, it's looking a lot more bare, and the bargain hunters

have descended.

Henry! Oi!

Yeah. He wants to pay two quid. I said a tenner. He wants two quid. No, it's a

fiver. Come on, split the difference.

We don't do change, man. Let's have a look.

That's all he's got. Mate, you're going to have to go and sell your phone. Oh,

go on, then. Give it in for two quid. Go on. Two quid. Oh, he said yes.

You're lucky he's taking a load of money, because he wouldn't normally have

that. He is tight.

I do a quick sale of a cheap and cheerful Mark III chopper to another

stallholder, Vince.

Oh, it's 100 quid.

No.

80. That's all I've got, sir.

Otherwise I'm going to go off and make some money on my stuff.

Go on then, off you go. Thank you.

I would say you're going to ride it off. Well, that's what I'm going to give a

go. Try it, mate, but I have never ridden it.

This might be the last thing you do. Does it start? Yeah, it does.

You're going to be fine. It fits you like a dream, Vince.

Honestly.

I think your tyre's a bit flat.

Keep pedalling, though. Can I have a refund? No!

You've got a ten -minute guarantee and you've just had it.

Got to tell you, I mean, I'm just trying to think now, but that probably was one

of the best.

jumbles we've done recently.

How much did we turn over? 2 ,000 what?

365.

And I know we made 850 quid profit. That's a good margin.

It's more polishing the caps it makes a difference. Oh yes.

And I remember Vince picked up that Mark 3 chopper bicycle.

The main thing is it was a proper auto jumble. Yeah, it's a proper auto jumble

with proper buyers there. They're hardcore punters who want to buy stuff.

You know what I mean? So it's the perfect perfect storm.

850 quid, eh?

Profit. Let's hope we can better that next time. Join us again very soon for

another Junk and Disorderly Best Bits.

It's so early.