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1
00:00:26,730 --> 00:00:27,730
You're a virgin, aren't you?
2
00:00:28,090 --> 00:00:29,090
Come on, Alice.
3
00:00:29,670 --> 00:00:32,509
You're 18 today, and you're supposed to
be my wife soon.
4
00:00:33,950 --> 00:00:36,210
At least let me try out the goods first.
5
00:00:37,550 --> 00:00:39,430
Why should I become your wife?
6
00:00:39,710 --> 00:00:44,370
You are as charming as a plug, and
there's nothing about you that impresses
7
00:00:44,830 --> 00:00:47,090
Well, let me show you what I can do with
my tongue.
8
00:00:47,810 --> 00:00:49,490
Maybe that will impress you.
9
00:01:16,339 --> 00:01:20,180
Oh. Oh my.
10
00:01:20,660 --> 00:01:27,200
Oh yes.
11
00:07:15,050 --> 00:07:16,050
ever seen this.
12
00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:56,430
Could it be? I can't tell. Just watch.
13
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:19,180
Guess I should put this on.
14
00:11:20,060 --> 00:11:22,020
Maybe this will help me get out of here.
15
00:11:42,040 --> 00:11:45,460
Where the hell am I?
16
00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:47,300
I think it is home.
17
00:11:55,820 --> 00:11:56,820
Who's there?
18
00:11:57,540 --> 00:11:58,940
Oh, my God.
19
00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:00,520
Who's there?
20
00:12:01,820 --> 00:12:02,820
Show yourself.
21
00:12:05,520 --> 00:12:07,240
Are you the Alice?
22
00:12:08,340 --> 00:12:10,040
Now, how would I know?
23
00:12:12,280 --> 00:12:15,460
You see, I just knew that wouldn't work.
24
00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:21,060
Well, there's one way we can definitely
find out. How's that?
25
00:12:21,380 --> 00:12:22,380
The Hatter!
26
00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:24,980
The Hatter! The Hatter! Follow us!
27
00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:26,960
Where are we going?
28
00:12:27,260 --> 00:12:28,440
Who's this Hatter?
29
00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:33,500
You're late.
30
00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:36,400
You're all very late for the party.
31
00:12:37,020 --> 00:12:42,000
What took you so long, harebrained? We
got here as fast as we could.
32
00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:44,360
And I take it you're Alice.
33
00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:50,080
Well, that, apparently, is the subject
up for debate, Mr. Hatter.
34
00:12:50,420 --> 00:12:51,420
I see.
35
00:12:51,760 --> 00:12:53,600
I'll know the Alice when I see her.
36
00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:56,120
And I'm feeling you just might be her.
37
00:12:56,860 --> 00:13:00,980
Excuse me? A bit taller than I remember,
and of course a little fuller of breath
38
00:13:00,980 --> 00:13:02,260
with kind features, soft skin.
39
00:13:02,680 --> 00:13:04,360
Regrettably, you're still headless,
unfortunately.
40
00:13:05,220 --> 00:13:09,680
Excuse me? Based on Copperfieldology,
you are undeniably, unequivocally the
41
00:13:09,680 --> 00:13:14,440
Alice. How can you be sure? How can I be
sure of those tits? Uh, thank you, I
42
00:13:14,440 --> 00:13:17,120
think. I think it's time to go.
43
00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:23,620
I hate to spoil you, Alice, but it is
your birthday, so I got you a present.
44
00:13:23,620 --> 00:13:28,740
me? I do love presents. I have a feeling
you'll love this one especially.
45
00:13:29,140 --> 00:13:30,140
Oh.
46
00:13:31,220 --> 00:13:32,220
Oh, yes.
47
00:13:32,620 --> 00:13:33,620
Oh.
48
00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:35,640
Oh.
49
00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:37,400
Oh, Mr.
50
00:13:37,620 --> 00:13:39,320
Potter. Oh.
51
00:13:40,380 --> 00:13:41,680
Oh. Oh.
52
00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:43,280
Oh.
53
00:13:47,340 --> 00:13:52,780
Tweet, twat. How about that? While I'm
fucking you, I'm thinking of hats.
54
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:56,300
Oh, yes.
55
00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:02,040
You're turning my seven and an eight
into a nine and three quarters.
56
00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:09,300
I'll give you a place to hang your hat.
57
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:01,060
And in my hat you'll go.
58
00:23:02,140 --> 00:23:03,140
Night, yes.
59
00:23:03,380 --> 00:23:04,380
What's happening?
60
00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:06,240
Oh. Where is she?
61
00:23:08,420 --> 00:23:12,660
I beg your pardon, but I haven't been
with your mother in quite a while.
62
00:23:13,740 --> 00:23:17,660
Where is the girl they call Alice
Hatter? Alice? I haven't seen her.
63
00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:21,460
Perhaps if I brought you before Her
Majesty the Queen, it might serve to jog
64
00:23:21,460 --> 00:23:22,460
your memory.
65
00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:24,060
There's an interesting idea.
66
00:23:24,420 --> 00:23:28,520
From what I... heard, she's more apt to
remove someone's memory than to jog it,
67
00:23:28,580 --> 00:23:32,060
but if you think that will work, I'm
willing to try it on a strictly part
68
00:23:32,060 --> 00:23:33,700
basis. Enough of this!
69
00:24:27,660 --> 00:24:30,740
I mean, where's the girl, you imbecile?
70
00:24:31,220 --> 00:24:34,520
If I knew I'd be there, have you seen
those tits?
71
00:24:35,020 --> 00:24:40,540
Shut up! You've got no information, and
you're too crazy to fuck. So what use
72
00:24:40,540 --> 00:24:41,540
are you to me?
73
00:24:41,600 --> 00:24:44,840
Guards, off with his head! Your Majesty,
I beseech you!
74
00:24:45,120 --> 00:24:46,120
What?
75
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,600
Your head, it's so large, sexy, and
beautiful.
76
00:24:50,300 --> 00:24:52,240
It begs to be hatted.
77
00:24:53,740 --> 00:24:56,920
Hatted? Of course, you deserve to be
hatted!
78
00:24:58,070 --> 00:25:01,930
Your Majesty, you're beautiful. When was
the last time you treated yourself to a
79
00:25:01,930 --> 00:25:04,790
new crown, some new jewels, something
slimming, perhaps?
80
00:25:06,150 --> 00:25:07,150
Go on.
81
00:25:07,810 --> 00:25:09,010
Well, that's about it.
82
00:25:09,210 --> 00:25:11,830
If you don't kill me, then I'll make you
a hat or two.
83
00:25:12,830 --> 00:25:13,830
Fine with me.
84
00:25:14,090 --> 00:25:15,090
Take him away.
85
00:25:16,170 --> 00:25:17,170
Not again.
86
00:25:17,230 --> 00:25:18,490
What a drag.
87
00:25:20,350 --> 00:25:21,970
Oh, what do I do now?
88
00:25:22,970 --> 00:25:24,830
Oh, the chalk.
89
00:25:28,740 --> 00:25:34,080
Jen! How did you get in here? What are
you? Tell me now!
90
00:25:34,380 --> 00:25:35,380
I'm not a what.
91
00:25:36,220 --> 00:25:37,220
I'm a who.
92
00:25:37,420 --> 00:25:38,660
That's a strange name.
93
00:25:39,100 --> 00:25:40,100
A who?
94
00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:44,000
It's a good thing you're so beautiful.
Come here, young lady.
95
00:25:44,420 --> 00:25:48,780
Yes, your majesty? I don't know what
you're doing here, but I'm glad you are,
96
00:25:48,940 --> 00:25:50,880
because I need someone to fuck.
97
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:54,180
Oh, who, me?
98
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,180
So tell me, have you ever been fucked by
a queen before?
99
00:26:10,360 --> 00:26:12,860
Oh, your neck!
100
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:56,460
He doesn't like my choice of hats.
101
00:34:57,180 --> 00:34:58,580
We've got to get out of here.
102
00:34:59,100 --> 00:35:00,098
Here, here.
103
00:35:00,100 --> 00:35:02,980
I haven't gotten it right yet. Give me a
week.
104
00:35:03,420 --> 00:35:04,420
A week?
105
00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:08,320
We have to leave now or they'll kill us.
Kill us?
106
00:35:08,580 --> 00:35:10,460
I thought they were starting to like me.
107
00:35:11,040 --> 00:35:15,440
What do I have to do to make you leave,
Hatter? The only way for us to get out
108
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:18,820
is for us to acquire the Vorpal Dildo.
It's our only chance.
109
00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:21,660
What? The Vorpal Dildo.
110
00:35:22,060 --> 00:35:25,070
Huh? You don't know about the Vorpal
Dildo?
111
00:35:25,410 --> 00:35:29,610
Why, it's the enchanted sexual device
that will bring harmony to Wonderland.
112
00:35:29,810 --> 00:35:32,190
You're crazy. It's hidden somewhere in
the castle.
113
00:35:32,410 --> 00:35:33,890
It's the only way to escape.
114
00:35:34,170 --> 00:35:35,290
It's your destiny.
115
00:35:36,010 --> 00:35:37,830
Right. All this needs is a feather.
116
00:35:38,450 --> 00:35:39,550
I'll be back later.
117
00:35:39,890 --> 00:35:41,690
Or maybe some blue sequins.
118
00:35:42,010 --> 00:35:43,070
Are you still here?
119
00:35:43,630 --> 00:35:44,630
You're crazy.
120
00:35:45,110 --> 00:35:46,610
Right then. Let's review.
121
00:35:47,240 --> 00:35:51,620
Without the Vorpal Dildo, there will
never be harmony in Wonderland, so no VD
122
00:35:51,620 --> 00:35:52,700
means no harmony.
123
00:35:53,040 --> 00:35:54,700
Okay, I'll go find it.
124
00:35:55,540 --> 00:35:56,540
Mm -hmm.
125
00:35:58,600 --> 00:36:00,580
Where was I? Oh, yes.
126
00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:04,480
Hmm. Sequence of patterns.
127
00:36:05,140 --> 00:36:07,980
Wait, I've got a great idea. How about
neon instead?
128
00:36:08,580 --> 00:36:10,260
Yes! That's it.
129
00:36:10,660 --> 00:36:14,380
Now I just need to get some neon gas and
get it excited.
130
00:36:15,840 --> 00:36:18,480
Yes. That'll be lovely, won't it?
131
00:36:20,180 --> 00:36:26,400
Earl Grey, eat your heart out. Speaking
of Earl Grey, how about a little tea?
132
00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:28,400
That would be nice. Oh, yes.
133
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:34,180
I'll never get out of this place.
134
00:36:35,040 --> 00:36:37,900
Why can't I just wake up from this
terrible dream?
135
00:36:51,279 --> 00:36:54,680
Tell me, why are you so anxious to get
back to the waking world?
136
00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:59,160
Oh, you scared me. Don't be afraid, my
dear. I assure you I can be very gentle.
137
00:36:59,980 --> 00:37:03,040
I'm sure the Queen will be pleased. Oh,
my poor dear, what the Queen doesn't
138
00:37:03,040 --> 00:37:04,040
know could fill a book.
139
00:37:04,340 --> 00:37:05,680
Excuse me, I need to go to the bathroom.
140
00:37:05,900 --> 00:37:08,780
Of course, it's just at the end of the
hall. You can't miss it.
141
00:37:09,740 --> 00:37:11,020
Oh, you wanker.
142
00:37:11,620 --> 00:37:12,740
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
143
00:37:33,070 --> 00:37:35,490
Think. Hmm. About everything.
144
00:37:39,730 --> 00:37:41,050
Oh?
145
00:37:43,450 --> 00:37:44,690
Oh.
146
00:37:46,950 --> 00:37:49,410
Ah. Huh.
147
00:37:50,150 --> 00:37:51,470
Oh.
148
00:38:16,610 --> 00:38:17,610
Yum, yum.
149
00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:15,680
I love you.
150
00:39:57,140 --> 00:40:01,280
I don't know.
151
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:07,280
What?
152
00:41:07,420 --> 00:41:08,820
What?
153
00:41:11,920 --> 00:41:13,280
What? What?
154
00:42:16,170 --> 00:42:18,010
way to be wakened in the morning, my
queen.
155
00:43:08,330 --> 00:43:09,330
It's just a tip.
156
00:44:52,430 --> 00:44:53,430
Can you be so sure, Michael?
157
00:51:40,140 --> 00:51:43,200
The guards are right behind her. We must
protect her.
158
00:51:48,680 --> 00:51:49,700
We're trapped!
159
00:51:56,800 --> 00:52:03,720
Oh, good morning,
160
00:52:03,840 --> 00:52:04,840
my little...
161
00:52:07,950 --> 00:52:09,410
And good morning to you, my dear sister.
162
00:52:09,630 --> 00:52:10,970
Hopefully you come in peace.
163
00:52:11,230 --> 00:52:15,450
May I ask you, what brings you and your
army here to my castle today?
164
00:52:15,670 --> 00:52:20,230
Give me my dildo! I'm the older sister,
and it's mine!
165
00:52:20,510 --> 00:52:22,890
Oh, dear sister, it is Alice's destiny.
166
00:52:23,210 --> 00:52:28,190
It is her fate to awaken the enchanted
vorpal dildo. It always has been.
167
00:52:32,710 --> 00:52:33,710
Wait!
168
00:52:34,430 --> 00:52:35,430
What?
169
00:54:59,950 --> 00:55:00,970
It wasn't just a dream.
11508
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