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1
00:00:02,033 --> 00:00:04,747
Just the man I want.
You went to catholic school.
2
00:00:04,868 --> 00:00:06,179
St. Mary's.
12 horrible years.
3
00:00:06,300 --> 00:00:08,179
I still have limited use
of my knuckles.
4
00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:10,012
Remember
a sister Margaret ?
5
00:00:10,133 --> 00:00:13,179
She was the ringleader. Scary,
awful, monster of a woman.
6
00:00:13,300 --> 00:00:15,747
Well, she speaks
highly of you, too, Paul.
7
00:00:15,868 --> 00:00:19,546
She's coming by here later. She's
having problems with her neighborhood.
8
00:00:19,667 --> 00:00:22,113
I said you would talk
to her about them.
9
00:00:22,234 --> 00:00:24,012
Never.
Not in a million years.
10
00:00:24,133 --> 00:00:26,079
Correct answer was
"yes, I'd love to,"
11
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:28,279
and good morning,
sister.
12
00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:29,813
Good morning,
sister ?
13
00:00:29,934 --> 00:00:31,167
Hello, Paul.
14
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:37,346
Morning. What could I do
for you, sister Margaret ?
15
00:00:37,467 --> 00:00:40,113
Start by telling me why I
never see you at church anymore.
16
00:00:40,234 --> 00:00:43,380
I... I joined
a different parish.
17
00:00:43,501 --> 00:00:44,946
And who's your priest ?
18
00:00:45,067 --> 00:00:46,901
Father
o'... Connor ?
19
00:00:48,100 --> 00:00:49,747
O'Leary ?
20
00:00:49,868 --> 00:00:52,246
O'Casey ?
21
00:00:52,367 --> 00:00:53,534
Oh, my.
22
00:00:54,868 --> 00:00:55,780
You're lyin'.
23
00:00:55,901 --> 00:00:57,380
Oh, god.
24
00:00:57,501 --> 00:00:59,546
Now you've taken
the lord's name in vain.
25
00:00:59,667 --> 00:01:02,346
Oh, god, I'm sorry.
Oh, god ! I did it again.
26
00:01:02,467 --> 00:01:03,480
Oh, god...
oh ! I can't stop.
27
00:01:03,601 --> 00:01:07,279
Oh, god. I can't stop !
Oh, ga-ga-ga-god...
28
00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,834
sister, I'll take care of this for you.
29
00:01:26,834 --> 00:01:29,546
Hopefully, it's not too transparent
an attempt to attract voters.
30
00:01:29,667 --> 00:01:32,113
We got the go-ahead on that free
concert, Madison square garden.
31
00:01:32,234 --> 00:01:33,713
Maxwell, Travis
and Johns
32
00:01:33,834 --> 00:01:36,012
are going to reunite
for one night only.
33
00:01:36,133 --> 00:01:37,513
Didn't they play
at Woodstock ?
34
00:01:37,634 --> 00:01:40,346
So what ? They've gotta
be, like, 90 years old.
35
00:01:40,467 --> 00:01:43,546
Why don't we just reunite
the Andrew sisters ?
36
00:01:43,667 --> 00:01:45,667
Hey, back off, man !
M.T.J. rocks.
37
00:01:48,334 --> 00:01:50,279
When I was 15,
my mom drove me
38
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:52,179
to the concert in Madison. Let me guess.
39
00:01:52,300 --> 00:01:55,213
You went to the concert,
the band "rocked,"
40
00:01:55,334 --> 00:01:59,213
you bought a $65 t-shirt,
and screamed like an idiot
41
00:01:59,334 --> 00:02:02,046
when the band said,
"hello, Wisconsin !"
42
00:02:02,167 --> 00:02:03,701
Were you there ?
43
00:02:05,901 --> 00:02:07,534
Ok, then.
Meeting is adjourned.
44
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,946
I say, meeting
is adjourned.
45
00:02:12,067 --> 00:02:13,513
What ?
46
00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,446
Are you going to
break up with Carrie ?
47
00:02:15,567 --> 00:02:17,313
When did it become
office policy
48
00:02:17,434 --> 00:02:18,979
to review
my personal life ?
49
00:02:19,100 --> 00:02:21,113
You started it, Mike.
When you became single,
50
00:02:21,234 --> 00:02:25,246
all you wanted to do
was talk and talk and talk.
51
00:02:25,367 --> 00:02:27,313
It was kind of like
a soap opera.
52
00:02:27,434 --> 00:02:30,667
First it was really,
really irritating.
53
00:02:32,634 --> 00:02:34,513
But you listen
to enough of it,
54
00:02:34,634 --> 00:02:37,267
and all of a sudden,
boom ! You're hooked.
55
00:02:38,934 --> 00:02:39,879
So, today on
56
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:42,767
"deputy Mayor
in heat..."
57
00:02:45,234 --> 00:02:46,313
all right.
58
00:02:46,434 --> 00:02:48,513
I like Carrie a lot,
59
00:02:48,634 --> 00:02:50,780
but she walks
that fine line
60
00:02:50,901 --> 00:02:53,179
between
incredibly intense
61
00:02:53,300 --> 00:02:54,834
and borderline loopy.
62
00:02:56,300 --> 00:02:58,446
So I'm afraid tonight I'll
have to break up with her.
63
00:02:58,567 --> 00:03:01,246
Hold on a second.
Paul couldn't be here.
64
00:03:01,367 --> 00:03:02,934
He asked me
to tape it.
65
00:03:06,467 --> 00:03:08,413
Ok. One last item:
66
00:03:08,534 --> 00:03:10,012
I'm having
a secret meeting
67
00:03:10,133 --> 00:03:11,546
tomorrow morning
68
00:03:11,667 --> 00:03:13,313
without Paul.
69
00:03:13,434 --> 00:03:15,046
I'd like you all
to show up
70
00:03:15,167 --> 00:03:16,601
around 5 a.m.
71
00:03:24,300 --> 00:03:26,467
4:30 is better
for me, Mike.
72
00:03:32,434 --> 00:03:35,179
That's you and me
at the duck pond.
73
00:03:35,300 --> 00:03:37,380
Don't we look happy ?
74
00:03:37,501 --> 00:03:38,813
Oh, yeah. Very.
75
00:03:38,934 --> 00:03:40,747
Very happy. Happy.
76
00:03:40,868 --> 00:03:42,946
Happy us.
77
00:03:43,067 --> 00:03:44,513
What's going on
with you, Mike ?
78
00:03:44,634 --> 00:03:46,213
You're all nervous.
79
00:03:46,334 --> 00:03:47,213
No, no.
80
00:03:47,334 --> 00:03:48,847
Oh ! Gosh.
Boo !
81
00:03:48,968 --> 00:03:51,313
See ? Come on,
lighten up.
82
00:03:51,434 --> 00:03:52,646
I can hear
your heart beating.
83
00:03:52,767 --> 00:03:54,934
I think my heart
has stopped.
84
00:03:56,868 --> 00:03:59,546
Ok. What did you
want to say ?
85
00:03:59,667 --> 00:04:02,546
Ok. All right.
Here it goes.
86
00:04:02,667 --> 00:04:05,946
Carrie, I just,
I feel very strong...
87
00:04:06,067 --> 00:04:07,413
can we move that ?
88
00:04:07,534 --> 00:04:09,501
The glare is really
killing me.
89
00:04:11,601 --> 00:04:14,480
There, there.
All better.
90
00:04:14,601 --> 00:04:16,346
Ok. You were saying ?
91
00:04:16,467 --> 00:04:18,446
Here it goes.
I think that...
92
00:04:18,567 --> 00:04:20,033
ok, now it's just
staring at me.
93
00:04:21,634 --> 00:04:24,879
Ok. You're having trouble
with conversation starters.
94
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:25,979
I've got one !
95
00:04:26,100 --> 00:04:27,747
I'm ready
to have children,
96
00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:29,834
and I think you'd make
a great father.
97
00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:35,646
Questions ? Comments ?
98
00:04:35,767 --> 00:04:38,012
I've only known you
for 3 weeks.
99
00:04:38,133 --> 00:04:39,613
I mean, I...
100
00:04:39,734 --> 00:04:41,912
normally I don't
discuss fatherhood
101
00:04:42,033 --> 00:04:44,946
or kids until...
102
00:04:45,067 --> 00:04:46,000
never.
103
00:04:47,667 --> 00:04:50,646
I am too old to go down
a very long road with someone
104
00:04:50,767 --> 00:04:53,446
unless I am sure they're
going to the same place.
105
00:04:53,567 --> 00:04:55,234
W- w-what
if we're not ?
106
00:04:57,667 --> 00:04:59,380
Well, then I guess
107
00:04:59,501 --> 00:05:01,701
I'd have to break up
with you.
108
00:05:07,567 --> 00:05:10,413
Get outta town.
109
00:05:10,534 --> 00:05:11,813
Are you...
are you serious ?
110
00:05:11,934 --> 00:05:13,501
I am totally serious.
111
00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:18,113
Wow. Wow.
112
00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:20,012
Well, then I...
113
00:05:20,133 --> 00:05:22,113
I guess...
114
00:05:22,234 --> 00:05:23,334
I guess it's over.
115
00:05:24,767 --> 00:05:27,067
I can't believe
you did this to me.
116
00:05:28,767 --> 00:05:30,413
Oh, Mike, maybe we
should think about it.
117
00:05:30,534 --> 00:05:31,467
No, no, no, no...
no, no.
118
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,580
No, no, no. That
wouldn't be fair to you,
119
00:05:35,701 --> 00:05:37,646
dragging it out
like that.
120
00:05:37,767 --> 00:05:40,033
No, no, no.
No, you've got a schedule.
121
00:05:41,667 --> 00:05:43,213
This just happened
so fast.
122
00:05:43,334 --> 00:05:45,834
I know. I just never
saw it comin'.
123
00:05:48,834 --> 00:05:49,767
Well, I gotta go.
124
00:05:51,033 --> 00:05:53,400
Wait ! Mike...
125
00:05:54,834 --> 00:05:55,847
just because
we're not gonna spend
126
00:05:55,968 --> 00:05:57,480
the rest of our lives
together
127
00:05:57,601 --> 00:05:58,580
doesn't mean
we can't have
128
00:05:58,701 --> 00:06:01,567
one more night
together.
129
00:06:02,934 --> 00:06:04,246
Wait. Wait.
130
00:06:04,367 --> 00:06:05,513
You just
broke up with me,
131
00:06:05,634 --> 00:06:08,246
and now
you want to...
132
00:06:08,367 --> 00:06:09,334
what are you,
a guy ?
133
00:06:14,868 --> 00:06:16,246
Wait a minute.
134
00:06:16,367 --> 00:06:18,634
You dumped her and slept
with her on the same night ?
135
00:06:20,100 --> 00:06:21,634
I mean, you're
like James bond.
136
00:06:23,334 --> 00:06:25,279
Congratulations,
Mike.
137
00:06:25,400 --> 00:06:28,046
Yeah, we're so proud of you.
138
00:06:28,167 --> 00:06:32,747
I was in a very vulnerable
place last night, ok ?
139
00:06:32,868 --> 00:06:34,801
I'm ashamed of myself.
140
00:06:39,300 --> 00:06:41,912
You just pulled down
your own rebound, Mike.
141
00:06:42,033 --> 00:06:43,380
Very few guys
in our league
142
00:06:43,501 --> 00:06:44,813
can score on
a play like that.
143
00:06:44,934 --> 00:06:46,146
I got a question.
144
00:06:46,267 --> 00:06:49,413
Did you have sex before
or after you broke up ?
145
00:06:49,534 --> 00:06:50,413
After.
146
00:06:50,534 --> 00:06:51,780
I've got news
for you, honey.
147
00:06:51,901 --> 00:06:53,534
You didn't break up.
148
00:06:54,734 --> 00:06:55,780
What's she
talking about ?
149
00:06:55,901 --> 00:06:58,580
Any sex within 24
hours after the break-up
150
00:06:58,701 --> 00:06:59,879
is technically
make-up sex.
151
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,601
Technically,
you made up.
152
00:07:05,234 --> 00:07:06,501
No.
153
00:07:07,934 --> 00:07:10,546
Aw, I'm so glad
that I was informed.
154
00:07:10,667 --> 00:07:12,613
I wish somebody
would just write down
155
00:07:12,734 --> 00:07:14,046
all these rules for me.
156
00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:15,179
I'll give you one.
157
00:07:15,300 --> 00:07:17,213
Next time you want
to end a relationship,
158
00:07:17,334 --> 00:07:19,300
try letting the woman
shake your hand.
159
00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:26,979
Hey, Paulie. What's up ?
You look like hell.
160
00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:30,601
There was no secret
meeting, was there, Mike ?
161
00:07:36,300 --> 00:07:37,646
'Fraid not, Paulie.
162
00:07:37,767 --> 00:07:39,033
Sorry about that.
163
00:07:40,667 --> 00:07:42,100
It's tomorrow.
164
00:07:48,167 --> 00:07:50,979
Sorry to keep
you dudes waiting.
165
00:07:51,100 --> 00:07:52,646
No problem,
Mr. Mayor.
166
00:07:52,767 --> 00:07:55,046
This is wonderful tea.
167
00:07:55,167 --> 00:07:56,546
Well, thank you.
Thank you.
168
00:07:56,667 --> 00:07:59,113
That's a rock 'n roll thing ?
That's good for the voice ?
169
00:07:59,234 --> 00:08:01,934
It keeps me regular.
170
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,501
Ok. Rock on.
171
00:08:05,801 --> 00:08:07,346
I hope you
don't mind me asking,
172
00:08:07,467 --> 00:08:10,079
but why did you fellas
break up in the first place ?
173
00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:12,613
That may be thin ice, sir. What ?
174
00:08:12,734 --> 00:08:14,146
That's all right.
Uh...
175
00:08:14,267 --> 00:08:16,813
we just lost sight
of why we played music.
176
00:08:16,934 --> 00:08:18,501
It became
all about money.
177
00:08:19,968 --> 00:08:21,179
So, you boys got
those contracts ?
178
00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:22,267
Yeah.
179
00:08:25,534 --> 00:08:28,646
Put your herbie
hancocks right there.
180
00:08:28,767 --> 00:08:32,046
Herbie hancocks. That's a
little rock 'n roll humor.
181
00:08:32,167 --> 00:08:33,767
Yeah.
It's a good one.
182
00:08:35,334 --> 00:08:36,912
You see, I thought
you broke up
183
00:08:37,033 --> 00:08:39,146
because you, Kevin,
write all the music
184
00:08:39,267 --> 00:08:43,446
and the lyrics, but Johnny
seems to get all the attention.
185
00:08:43,567 --> 00:08:46,580
Yeah, always did have a knack
for sticking' his face out front.
186
00:08:46,701 --> 00:08:48,747
I don't deserve
a little recognition ?
187
00:08:48,868 --> 00:08:49,879
Tell you what...
188
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:51,912
let's play "first one
to sign the contract
189
00:08:52,033 --> 00:08:56,246
gets a free picture of
the Mayor on his vacation."
190
00:08:56,367 --> 00:08:57,346
Oh, look, Johnny.
191
00:08:57,467 --> 00:08:58,580
It's the same island
192
00:08:58,701 --> 00:09:00,413
you and your bimbo
girlfriend stayed on
193
00:09:00,534 --> 00:09:03,079
while I was holed up in the
studio writing our last album.
194
00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:04,646
I should have
renamed that one
195
00:09:04,767 --> 00:09:07,300
bite me, you ungrateful,
self-centered jerk.
196
00:09:08,767 --> 00:09:09,747
Well, hey, now,
197
00:09:09,868 --> 00:09:10,747
we both know
that wouldn't sell
198
00:09:10,868 --> 00:09:12,446
a million copies.
199
00:09:12,567 --> 00:09:13,968
I'm outta here.
200
00:09:18,667 --> 00:09:20,801
Way to go with
the picture, Mike.
201
00:09:25,868 --> 00:09:27,546
Care for a cup of coffee, sister ?
202
00:09:27,667 --> 00:09:30,179
I take my strength
from the lord, Paul,
203
00:09:30,300 --> 00:09:33,100
not from some
popular narcotic.
204
00:09:36,501 --> 00:09:39,613
Now, tomorrow I'm coming
with the entire parish
205
00:09:39,734 --> 00:09:41,747
to talk about
our security issues.
206
00:09:41,868 --> 00:09:43,780
I want a plan for
keeping those hooligans
207
00:09:43,901 --> 00:09:44,879
off the property.
208
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,780
You could put
a big picture
209
00:09:46,901 --> 00:09:48,780
of yourself
out front.
210
00:09:48,901 --> 00:09:51,434
That might
do the trick.
211
00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:58,879
Carrie's here.
212
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,901
Oh ! Just a minute,
Janelle.
213
00:10:04,868 --> 00:10:06,000
Mike ?
214
00:10:08,634 --> 00:10:10,079
You look terrible.
215
00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:11,979
There are going
to be good days,
216
00:10:12,100 --> 00:10:14,580
and there are
going to be bad.
217
00:10:14,701 --> 00:10:16,346
Why did you
want to see me ?
218
00:10:16,467 --> 00:10:18,946
I guess I just...
I had to know for sure
219
00:10:19,067 --> 00:10:21,801
that it...
it was really over.
220
00:10:23,667 --> 00:10:25,067
I'm sorry, Mike.
It is.
221
00:10:28,501 --> 00:10:31,480
Well, that's ok.
I just had to know...
222
00:10:31,601 --> 00:10:32,534
for sure.
223
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:35,434
Shake ?
224
00:10:40,801 --> 00:10:43,380
You know, it's been
tough on me, too.
225
00:10:43,501 --> 00:10:45,279
I mean, I sat there
last night.
226
00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:47,079
I laid in bed
all night
227
00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:49,413
hearing nothing
but the sound of that clock
228
00:10:49,534 --> 00:10:52,813
next to my bed,
counting away my life.
229
00:10:52,934 --> 00:10:56,179
Tick, tick, tick.
230
00:10:56,300 --> 00:10:59,346
And then I realized
what I need to do.
231
00:10:59,467 --> 00:11:01,767
Get a digital clock ?
232
00:11:03,133 --> 00:11:05,480
I can't wait any longer,
233
00:11:05,601 --> 00:11:08,480
so I'm just gonna go ahead
and have a baby on my own.
234
00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:09,713
That's great.
235
00:11:09,834 --> 00:11:11,580
Me ? I'm gonna
go out and have
236
00:11:11,701 --> 00:11:14,346
a couple of beers with the guys, but...
237
00:11:14,467 --> 00:11:17,079
we all handle grief
in our own ways.
238
00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:22,213
See ? Your sense of humor.
That's such a wonderful trait.
239
00:11:22,334 --> 00:11:25,701
Ahh, that's why I'm so
happy I'm having your baby.
240
00:11:34,501 --> 00:11:36,546
Are you telling me
that you're pregnant ?
241
00:11:36,667 --> 00:11:40,346
Nope. But I will be,
thanks to you.
242
00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:42,346
Wait, am I missing
a step here,
243
00:11:42,467 --> 00:11:46,879
because if you're talking
about last night,
244
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,580
I took precautions...
245
00:11:48,701 --> 00:11:50,179
we took precautions.
246
00:11:50,300 --> 00:11:52,313
Let's just say
I'm the kind of girl
247
00:11:52,434 --> 00:11:55,167
that never throws
anything away.
248
00:12:01,234 --> 00:12:03,346
I put it in the freezer.
249
00:12:03,467 --> 00:12:05,968
You froze my guys ? !
250
00:12:08,100 --> 00:12:09,713
I'm just here
to get your blessing.
251
00:12:09,834 --> 00:12:12,513
What am I, the pope ? ! !
252
00:12:12,634 --> 00:12:16,279
Don't yell at me. Those are
my guys ! ! ! I want them back !
253
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:18,513
All right, look, if you're
gonna be all weird about this,
254
00:12:18,634 --> 00:12:20,801
I'm just gonna leave.
You can't do this !
255
00:12:23,534 --> 00:12:25,801
Give me back my sperm !
256
00:12:30,934 --> 00:12:32,667
How you guys doin' ?
257
00:12:39,567 --> 00:12:41,012
Crucified in the press.
258
00:12:41,133 --> 00:12:44,513
My approval ratings
have dropped overnight.
259
00:12:44,634 --> 00:12:46,646
Get that band back
together again.
260
00:12:46,767 --> 00:12:48,713
My first priority,
sir.
261
00:12:48,834 --> 00:12:52,133
Ok. Mike's fertility
clinic open for business.
262
00:12:53,801 --> 00:12:55,680
Nikki. Medical. Go.
263
00:12:55,801 --> 00:12:58,680
This particular
insemination method can work,
264
00:12:58,801 --> 00:13:02,033
although obviously it isn't
popular amongst most women.
265
00:13:03,601 --> 00:13:06,133
For one, they don't get
dinner and cab fare home.
266
00:13:07,467 --> 00:13:08,580
All right. Legal.
267
00:13:08,701 --> 00:13:11,213
Basically, the rulings
are confusing
268
00:13:11,334 --> 00:13:13,012
and arbitrary,
269
00:13:13,133 --> 00:13:17,601
referring to... lots of cases
in books I couldn't find.
270
00:13:22,167 --> 00:13:24,246
Keep in mind
I'm not a lawyer.
271
00:13:24,367 --> 00:13:26,067
Mike, that's
Carrie on line 2.
272
00:13:27,434 --> 00:13:28,446
Uh, Carrie. Hi.
273
00:13:28,567 --> 00:13:30,979
Uh, yeah.
Listen, uh... uh...
274
00:13:31,100 --> 00:13:33,012
put her on... put her...
what ? What ?
275
00:13:33,133 --> 00:13:34,513
Put her on hold !
Trust me.
276
00:13:34,634 --> 00:13:36,912
Put her on.
Put her on hold.
277
00:13:37,033 --> 00:13:39,613
Carrie, I'm just
gonna put you on hold.
278
00:13:39,734 --> 00:13:43,246
Mike, I was this close
from getting into the CIA.
279
00:13:43,367 --> 00:13:45,213
Trust me,
we gotta treat this
280
00:13:45,334 --> 00:13:47,701
like a hostage situation.
281
00:13:49,834 --> 00:13:50,767
Lassiter here.
282
00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:55,046
Yes, I am fully apprised
of the situation.
283
00:13:55,167 --> 00:13:57,213
Now, before we can even
begin to talk,
284
00:13:57,334 --> 00:13:59,046
as a show
of good faith,
285
00:13:59,167 --> 00:14:00,513
you have to release 1,
286
00:14:00,634 --> 00:14:02,901
maybe 2 million
of the hostages.
287
00:14:13,934 --> 00:14:15,946
Kevin, I was hoping it
wouldn't have to come to this,
288
00:14:16,067 --> 00:14:19,701
but I got some photographs
of you and Elton John.
289
00:14:21,067 --> 00:14:23,313
I think you might
want them back.
290
00:14:23,434 --> 00:14:26,200
I used those as
Christmas cards in '84.
291
00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:30,346
All right. That
was my best shot.
292
00:14:30,467 --> 00:14:31,879
Look, you gotta
understand.
293
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:34,646
I got a lot
going on right now.
294
00:14:34,767 --> 00:14:36,413
I...
295
00:14:36,534 --> 00:14:41,012
I had sex with
this woman... Kevin...
296
00:14:41,133 --> 00:14:42,667
and she wants
to get pregnant.
297
00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:45,634
She kidnapped my guys.
298
00:14:47,334 --> 00:14:49,613
And she put 'em
in the freezer.
299
00:14:49,734 --> 00:14:51,033
That old story.
300
00:14:52,501 --> 00:14:56,946
Oh, uh, James. Kevin
Travis, this is James Hobert.
301
00:14:57,067 --> 00:14:58,580
He's the Mayor's
speech writer.
302
00:14:58,701 --> 00:14:59,613
Hi.
303
00:14:59,734 --> 00:15:01,167
I'm your... uh...
304
00:15:02,434 --> 00:15:05,167
yours... all your albums... I...
305
00:15:06,234 --> 00:15:08,113
anyway, if you're
going to say no,
306
00:15:08,234 --> 00:15:10,100
I dare ya.
Say no to him.
307
00:15:12,434 --> 00:15:14,146
* baby, baby *
308
00:15:14,267 --> 00:15:16,000
* I love ya, baby **
309
00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:19,446
that song
changed my life.
310
00:15:19,567 --> 00:15:20,713
Mine, too.
311
00:15:20,834 --> 00:15:22,701
Went double platinum.
I bought an island.
312
00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,346
I'm your biggest fan.
I bought the vest
313
00:15:27,467 --> 00:15:29,246
you wore on your
first tour for $1,000.
314
00:15:29,367 --> 00:15:31,534
Never worn a vest
in my life.
315
00:15:33,834 --> 00:15:35,100
Oh, god.
316
00:15:39,834 --> 00:15:42,279
You're meeting with the
lesbian activists tonight.
317
00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:45,380
I've got sister Margaret,
so I was wondering,
318
00:15:45,501 --> 00:15:48,413
what do you say
we trade ? Ok ?
319
00:15:48,534 --> 00:15:51,113
My nuns
for your lesbians.
320
00:15:51,234 --> 00:15:53,680
They're not baseball
cards, Paul.
321
00:15:53,801 --> 00:15:56,413
And besides, what do
you know about lesbians ?
322
00:15:56,534 --> 00:15:58,680
What do lesbians
know about me ?
323
00:15:58,801 --> 00:16:01,946
This could be
a fabulous opportunity.
324
00:16:02,067 --> 00:16:04,067
To remind them
why they're lesbians ?
325
00:16:07,868 --> 00:16:11,046
Carrie's on her way. I gotta go.
You all know your assignments.
326
00:16:11,167 --> 00:16:13,780
Carter, Stuart, you're with me.
While I break into her apartment,
327
00:16:13,901 --> 00:16:15,380
you hold the cab,
you the elevator.
328
00:16:15,501 --> 00:16:19,246
Nikki, you are plan "b."
Distract Carrie with these.
329
00:16:19,367 --> 00:16:20,912
Sperm bank
pamphlets ?
330
00:16:21,033 --> 00:16:23,079
Yeah. It's a list
of donors.
331
00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:25,580
A fool's errand, but see
if you can find somebody
332
00:16:25,701 --> 00:16:27,667
who's got
somethin' I don't.
333
00:16:28,934 --> 00:16:30,446
Mike, I didn't get
an assignment.
334
00:16:30,567 --> 00:16:33,346
Yours is the most
important job of all.
335
00:16:33,467 --> 00:16:35,567
You stay here
and look busy. Ok ?
336
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,046
I gotta get going.
By my precise calculations,
337
00:16:39,167 --> 00:16:40,713
she should be here
in 5 minutes.
338
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:41,979
HI, dad.
339
00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:43,501
Damn this watch.
340
00:16:44,701 --> 00:16:47,713
Hi. Carrie, please,
right this way.
341
00:16:47,834 --> 00:16:49,847
Carter, Stuart, I have
to take this meeting,
342
00:16:49,968 --> 00:16:52,046
so I can't take
the other meeting.
343
00:16:52,167 --> 00:16:55,113
Could you take
that meeting for me ?
344
00:16:55,234 --> 00:16:57,780
What meeting ? I thought you
were breaking into the apartment.
345
00:16:57,901 --> 00:16:59,747
Now you understand why
your role in the mission
346
00:16:59,868 --> 00:17:01,879
is to stay here
and look busy.
347
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:04,513
Carter, before you go,
348
00:17:04,634 --> 00:17:08,100
I'm begging you, switch with
me. Please ! I'll do anything.
349
00:17:10,133 --> 00:17:11,847
I can't believe
you'd rather commit a felony
350
00:17:11,968 --> 00:17:13,513
than talk to some nuns.
351
00:17:13,634 --> 00:17:15,413
Just stand there
while I get my bearings.
352
00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:17,012
I have a very keen
night vision.
353
00:17:17,133 --> 00:17:18,813
In few moments,
it's going to seem
354
00:17:18,934 --> 00:17:20,446
like broad daylight
in here.
355
00:17:20,567 --> 00:17:21,613
Does this help ?
356
00:17:21,734 --> 00:17:23,446
Ow. Ow.
357
00:17:23,567 --> 00:17:27,012
Ouch. No, my pupils
were fully dilated.
358
00:17:27,133 --> 00:17:29,613
I still can't get over
that outfit.
359
00:17:29,734 --> 00:17:32,279
You can stand and laugh, but when
we're fleeing from the police,
360
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:34,747
which one of us
will they notice first ?
361
00:17:34,868 --> 00:17:37,634
I'm guessin' the guy that
looks like Catwoman on steroids.
362
00:17:40,367 --> 00:17:43,546
Come on. Let's get going.
Watch out for your fingerprints.
363
00:17:43,667 --> 00:17:46,380
Don't touch anything.
Just unplug the refrigerator.
364
00:17:46,501 --> 00:17:48,680
When she figures out what
happened, it'll be too late.
365
00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:50,133
I think I got it.
I got it.
366
00:17:53,067 --> 00:17:54,646
Oh. That's not it.
367
00:17:54,767 --> 00:17:55,946
Grab the stuff
and let's go.
368
00:17:56,067 --> 00:17:57,813
You grab the stuff.
I paid for the cab.
369
00:17:57,934 --> 00:17:58,813
I picked the lock.
370
00:17:58,934 --> 00:18:00,580
I broke the toaster !
371
00:18:00,701 --> 00:18:02,879
Oh, my god.
We're gonna get caught.
372
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:05,646
Oh, god. I'll never see
the light of day again.
373
00:18:05,767 --> 00:18:06,713
Get the package.
374
00:18:06,834 --> 00:18:07,912
What package ?
375
00:18:08,033 --> 00:18:09,912
Aaah ! I'm panicking !
376
00:18:10,033 --> 00:18:11,367
Every man for himself !
377
00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:22,912
How'd it go, guys ?
378
00:18:23,033 --> 00:18:23,912
Tell him, Paul.
379
00:18:24,033 --> 00:18:25,446
Tell him how
you saved the day.
380
00:18:25,567 --> 00:18:27,113
Is this it ?
381
00:18:27,234 --> 00:18:29,346
Welcome home, fellas.
382
00:18:29,467 --> 00:18:32,033
Mike, that's
frozen yogurt.
383
00:18:33,934 --> 00:18:35,413
Mike, you gotta
understand.
384
00:18:35,534 --> 00:18:38,067
Mike, the bad news is
you're going to be a father.
385
00:18:39,834 --> 00:18:42,046
The good news is
we saved you a teaspoon
386
00:18:42,167 --> 00:18:44,367
of this fat-free
frozen dessert treat.
387
00:18:45,701 --> 00:18:46,780
Mike, please.
388
00:18:46,901 --> 00:18:47,979
Understand.
There were sirens
389
00:18:48,100 --> 00:18:50,380
and they kept getting
closer and closer...
390
00:18:50,501 --> 00:18:51,813
and then
what happened, Paul ?
391
00:18:51,934 --> 00:18:54,946
They kept getting
farther and farther away.
392
00:18:55,067 --> 00:18:58,413
All of you failed
at your assignments.
393
00:18:58,534 --> 00:19:00,467
No, no, no, Mike. Not
me. I'm busy. Busy-busy.
394
00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:08,780
Ok. Now, I know
395
00:19:08,901 --> 00:19:10,946
that you really want to
have a baby with someone,
396
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:13,847
and I know that you're afraid
you won't find that person.
397
00:19:13,968 --> 00:19:16,946
Hey, I'm afraid, too, but
believe me when I tell you
398
00:19:17,067 --> 00:19:18,747
one day you will,
and you're gonna be
399
00:19:18,868 --> 00:19:22,601
so, so happy
that you waited.
400
00:19:28,434 --> 00:19:30,480
Blah, blah, blah.
401
00:19:30,601 --> 00:19:32,079
Blah, blah,
blah, blah.
402
00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:33,801
Ok, you're nuts.
403
00:19:40,501 --> 00:19:43,346
You padlocked
the freezer.
404
00:19:43,467 --> 00:19:47,133
Fine. I'm taking the
whole thing with me.
405
00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:55,334
Could you hold
the door for me ?
406
00:20:00,434 --> 00:20:03,046
Well, we did it.
407
00:20:03,167 --> 00:20:04,780
How'd we do it ?
408
00:20:04,901 --> 00:20:07,513
Sir, he's got a daughter
applying to colleges,
409
00:20:07,634 --> 00:20:09,847
and once he found out my
father was president of Yale,
410
00:20:09,968 --> 00:20:11,847
things just
fell into place.
411
00:20:11,968 --> 00:20:14,346
I thought your father
was a pharmacist.
412
00:20:14,467 --> 00:20:16,734
Sir, with all due respect,
do you wanna rock, or what ?
413
00:20:19,634 --> 00:20:21,279
Hey, Mike, how'd it go ?
414
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:23,334
Just call me pops.
415
00:20:24,467 --> 00:20:26,279
Can't you feel
the excitement, Mike ?
416
00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:29,613
Oh, yeah, sir. A couple of
hippies stumble out of retirement
417
00:20:29,734 --> 00:20:32,179
and pad their investment portfolios.
418
00:20:32,300 --> 00:20:33,912
Whoopee, sir.
419
00:20:34,033 --> 00:20:36,046
This is more than
some old hippies, Mike.
420
00:20:36,167 --> 00:20:37,680
This is Clark,
Prado, and Conrad !
421
00:20:37,801 --> 00:20:41,234
No. Those are
your attorneys, sir.
422
00:20:42,934 --> 00:20:46,413
New York city knows
how to rock 'n roll !
423
00:20:46,534 --> 00:20:47,946
And as a thank-you
to our fans,
424
00:20:48,067 --> 00:20:50,313
get ready for the biggest
rock band in history
425
00:20:50,434 --> 00:20:53,580
to give you the biggest light
show in the history of rockdom !
426
00:20:53,701 --> 00:20:55,046
Let's rock !
427
00:20:55,167 --> 00:20:56,567
***
428
00:21:05,133 --> 00:21:08,946
You're not supposed to hold the
lighter up till the end of the show.
429
00:21:09,067 --> 00:21:10,813
That is the end
of the show, sir.
430
00:21:10,934 --> 00:21:12,747
Power's out
all over the city.
431
00:21:12,868 --> 00:21:15,079
Everywhere ?
It's a tragedy.
432
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:16,613
I mean, the city
can't exist
433
00:21:16,734 --> 00:21:19,446
without its subways and
its traffic lights, its...
434
00:21:19,567 --> 00:21:20,501
refrigerators.
435
00:21:31,601 --> 00:21:34,334
We've got bigger problems
than melting ice cream, Mike.
436
00:21:35,667 --> 00:21:37,033
I don't, sir.
437
00:21:43,968 --> 00:21:45,713
The power
will be off for a while,
438
00:21:45,834 --> 00:21:47,213
so we should get started.
439
00:21:47,334 --> 00:21:49,513
This administration
is very proud
440
00:21:49,634 --> 00:21:52,580
of its open attitude
towards alternative lifestyles.
441
00:21:52,701 --> 00:21:54,613
Who you choose to share
your bed with
442
00:21:54,734 --> 00:21:56,847
or who you choose
to shower with
443
00:21:56,968 --> 00:22:00,246
or whatever
is entirely your choice.
444
00:22:00,367 --> 00:22:02,713
Consensual sex
is entirely that.
445
00:22:02,834 --> 00:22:05,133
Consensual.
So, enjoy.
446
00:22:07,901 --> 00:22:08,834
Uhh.
447
00:22:10,968 --> 00:22:12,613
I'm sorry.
448
00:22:12,734 --> 00:22:14,946
It's the wrong room.
449
00:22:15,067 --> 00:22:17,634
Sit, Ubu, sit.
Good dog.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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