All language subtitles for Kikoriki Legend of the Golden Drago.2016.HDRip.XviD.AC3-EVO1

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Original subtitles

Once upon a time,

there was a handsome narrator.

He opened a movie by telling

the story of a jungle tribe,

happy and carefree

and generally idiotic.

One day, a shaman predicted

that their good times

would soon come to a tragic end.

But the shaman's intern butted in

and announced that they would be saved

by a deity named The Golden Dragon.

The shaman freaked out

and revoked his intern's course credit

for contradicting him.

But it was too late,

the villagers had hope again

and went back to their ridiculous

dance routines.

The name of The Golden Dragon

was passed down from generation to generation

to, well, until it was forgotten,

but then it is remembered again

and became legend,

The Legend of The Golden Dragon,

and the handsome narrator.

Move, move, move.

Pick it up, Wally.

I've seen noses that run faster than you.

Yeah, Wally.

Come on, let's go team, onward.

Oh, shake a leg, lamb chop,

or are you waiting for me to make applesauce?

Shake a leg?

He's quivering all over.

No, I'm not quivering,

it's just chilly out here.

- Aren't you guys chilly? - Go.

Careful of the loose ones.

Oh, which ones are the loose ones?

All of them.

Hop those legs, Wally.

Don't look down.

Nobody's stupid enough to look down... oh.

Faster.

Need a little lift there, buddy?

Oh, that's it.

I just can't make it.

Go on, save yourselves.

Oh, wait for me.

Faster! Move, team, go, go, go, go, go!

Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Perfect.

Perfect? This is perfect?

What's next? A group checking the dentist?

Oh, my horoscope was right.

I should've stayed under the bed today!

Whoa.

Rock and roll, woo.

Oh, this is not good,

not good, oh.

I can't fly. Whoa.

Wally, no. What are you doing, Wally?

What are you... Oh, come on, Wally, give me a break.

No.

Oh, Wally, what are you doing up there?

Get off my head.

Huh?

What? What is it?

What's going on?

Oh, why did I have to ask?

On your right.

Oh.

Are you kidding?

No.

Oh, Wally.

- What was that, Wally? - We are dead.

- When I get my hooves on you... - Now, now, everybody.

Keep your hooves to yourselves.

I need my computer back.

This isn't fair.

I have another life left.

But you're wrong, you only have one life,

and you shouldn't waste it playing video games.

Now, please, Krash, I'm already behind schedule.

Now, we have to stop

because Wally's afraid

of a stupid 8-bit toad?

But I wasn't scared.

I was surprised

by how scary it was.

Whoa.

Oh, here we go, girl,

hop, hop,

very good, good girl.

Hop, hop.

Great. Not now.

Not yet.

Oh, ow.

Well...

Holy carrot.

Ah, our master pilot,

is this beauty ready for our big flight

overseas tomorrow?

It's an auspicious day.

Yeah, everything's ship shape,

except the couple sticky thing flips,

nothing a few whacks

with a frying pan can't fix.

- You got a frying pan? - Frying pan?

I might have a fondue pot somewhere.

Aah, close enough.

Hey, guys, open hatch, 12:00.

It looks like today won't be a complete waste after all, huh?

Yeah, what are we waiting for?

Waiting for? We all just saw that thing

crash out of the sky, and catch fire,

like a roman candle.

This is ridiculous.

Tell them, Rosa.

- Wally, hurry up... - Rosa?

Rosa? Shh.

Uh, who?

Me?

Be right there.

No, I won't.

Oh, forget it.

Stay on the ground like a wiggly worm.

Let's get airborne.

Have a good test flight.

Ha-ha, they're all aboard, baby cakes.

Clear the decks, chocks away.

Increase the power. Turbines, for speed.

What is this blinking light?

Ah, that's better.

Oh, no.

Wally? Hi, there.

Sorry, I'm a little nervous.

The big conference is tomorrow,

and I haven't practiced

my speech yet.

Imagine, the scientific luminary

like Dokko unprepared.

I could use your help if you have the time.

Oh.

Time?

I've got nothing but time,

because I'm Wally.

What did they want from me?

I'm not a professional gamer

or a test pilot.

Hmm?

Oh, klutz.

What about that loop-the-loop?

I thought my guts were gonna fly out of my ears.

Yeah, there was so much blood in my brain,

I thought my eyes were gonna pop out.

- So, Rosa... - Uh-huh?

Oh.

I could never be as athletic as Krash,

- or as strong as Berry. - Hey.

- Oh, hey, Berry. - So what's Dokko

dreamed up for us this time, do you think?

He said it was the invention of the century.

Of course, he did.

And I'm going to help him demonstrate

the latest invention of the century.

Oh, you're in for a good time.

Oh, terrific.

Ladies and gentlemen,

the greatest mind of our time,

the moose who put the I in science, Dokko.

Ta-da.

Do we clap?

- Nah. - In preparation for our big

flight to the FRED conference,

the Festival of Ranting Engineering Dweebs,

welcome to this...

Sorry, I'm late.

That fiber will sneak up

on you like a ninja.

You didn't miss anything,

just the greatest invention

- of all time again. - Ahem.

And now, at last,

a revolution in self-help,

a miracle of modern technology.

The wonderful, Improve-riser...

This is where you applaud madly.

Huh?

Uh-huh.

Improve-riser?

And just what is this improve-rising?

Only total co-use of cognitive

and motor skills.

Or in layman's terms,

borrowing someone's talents

by means of this slick and fashionable headgear.

For example,

some of us are excellent dancers,

or can play guitar,

or run very fast.

Now, by simply wearing this helmet,

you can trade any ability

with anyone else.

- I can learn... - Oh, yes.

Dokko?

Could Chiko weed my tulip garden?

Just as good as I can?

Hey, wait a minute.

Allow me to demonstrate

how the Improve-riser operates.

Let's observe,

if I could just be joined by my strapping,

and athletic, and daring young assistant,

right there.

- What? - He's just mad.

- No way. - Oh.

- Me? - Sorry, I meant Krash,

obviously.

That's me.

Go, Krash!

All right. Now, who out there

would like to jump like Krash?

Give it a try.

- Come on, Olga, go for it. - Come on, you can do it.

Right, it's time to make history.

Here's how it works,

with the helmet securely on the subject's head,

like so, the abilities are transferred

from the donor all the way across

to the lucky recipient.

With only a push

of a button.

Oh. Oh!

How are you feeling?

Oh, fidgety.

Go.

Whoa, whoa.

Taking a roll.

Try to catch me.

You can't catch me.

I'm truly a genius, yes, truly.

And if you want to switch over

to your original abilities,

just press the button thing one more time,

no problem.

Everything will go straight back to normal.

Look at it.

Yeah, science.

- Outstanding. - Just amazing.

Sizzling...

Just incredible.

Enough of the sheepish, sheep.

Tomorrow,

the whole world meets

a brave, new Wally.

Nice...

and gentle.

Nice... huh?

I'm so sorry. Chocks away.

* Chocks away *

* < Sleep today > < in a hammock you' ll stay > *

Okay.

There.

Yes.

Ah, okay.

I'm sure Krash will be more than happy

to lend me a little bravery,

yeah, just a bit here, he'll never miss it.

Now, while I'm here, hmm.

Oh, of course,

it wouldn't hurt to get a smidge of Berry's strength

and a little of Dokko's smarts,

Carlin's talent and Olga's...

Huh?

What?

Don't look at me like that.

Like you wouldn't do exactly the same thing.

Okay.

Now, it's time,

good-bye, old Wally.

Get ready, world,

for the new upgraded Wally.

Whoa.

Whoa.

Oh.

That can't be good.

Oh, no, you bug,

get out of here.

What happened?

Where am I?

Oh, there I am.

Wait, what?

How can I be over there

when I'm right over here?

Oh, no.

Oh, crud, oh, crud,

oh, crud!

Wait a minute.

That thing's not an Improve-riser,

it's a switcheriser.

All right, Wally, just don't panic,

you can change it back.

Whoa.

I'll put things back to the way they were,

that's all, just back to the way they were.

Okay, guy.

Just hang on.

Oh. Just.

How am I supposed to move around on these things?

Hey, you,

we need to change back, right now.

Stop eating carrots and listen to me.

You don't even like carrots!

Wait.

No, stop.

Stop, right there,

right now.

Listen, mister, do not get me angry.

There, good, good,

just like that.

Great, it'll be all be over in a minute.

We're just going to press

one incy button and... oh.

No, no, no, no, no.

Are you freaking kidding me?

Coffee.

I'll have a carrot juice on the rocks.

What's four letters

meaning ancient battle axe?

What?

Olga, that's an easy one.

Snacks.

Too bad Wally's not here.

- Tea. - You're sure you tried...

Yeah.

Yeah, I almost beat his doors out.

How could he miss this soothing flight

in the clouds?

Time to flipping the flippers.

I wonder what this one does.

Pin, let me know when you get tired.

I can take over for you, no problem.

< Fräuleins > don't fly.

That's hysterical.

What's next?

A sandwich for a president?

Coffee, please.

Oh.

Oh, no, no.

I'm never going outside again!

What gives,

you hunk of < gerümpel >,

you stupid!

Nein, nein, nein, nein!

Four letters, a call for aide.

Tea.

Thanks.

Coffee.

* My rock and roll *

* Rock and roll *

* Sex-bomb, sex bomb *

* You're a sex bomb *

* You can give it to me *

* When I need to come along... *

* My rock and roll *

* Rock and roll *

You can stop... and climb again.

Huh?

Pin, I need your help.

Who says this?

Whoa.

No.

Not that lever, not that lever.

Not that lever.

Oh, no.

Who turned off the gravity?

I don't know, but it wasn't me.

Well, somebody better turn it back on.

Oh, that's good.

But not quite, mate. Everyone, out.

Go. Go. Go.

My Improve-riser.

I forgot to lock my tray table.

Come on, slow pokes, no time to lollygag.

Well, at least this beats serving drinks.

Hey, heads up.

So what do I now...?

Alright, who doesn't have a parachute yet?

- Speak up. - I'm speaking up.

- Don't leave me here. - Geronimo.

Berry, wait for me.

No. Don't even think about it.

Berry, watch out.

This is awesome.

- This is terrifying. - Where is it?

Hey.

This isn't my parachute.

Huh?

Berry.

What the...?

I can't steer this thing.

I can't steer this thing.

Hit the brakes.

I'm going to hork.

Don't you dare.

The red cord. Where is the red cord?

Oh, here.

That wasn't so...

Chocks away.

I haven't had that much fun

since I got stuck in that buttered shirt.

Krash, never let me fly again.

Has anyone seen my glasses?

Oh, boy.

Have you seen my hat? Anybody?

The Improve-riser, did it survive?

- Anyone? - Oh, stop crying.

I want to get off.

My body.

Guys, has anybody seen my body around?

I can't find it anywhere.

Where's my hat?

I must be seeing things.

What a concussion.

I am not a concussion.

- Ew, it's a gross worm. - I'm not gross...

There's my hat, you greedy worm.

Oh, here's what we do with these.

Stop it.

I am not a worm,

I'm Wally.

What the... this stuff ought to have a warning label on it,

it may cause talking moth things.

I'm not a moth, I'm a caterpillar...

No, I'm not a caterpillar, it's me, Wally.

And I just want to find

my body.

Okay, boys.

We got to somehow find that plane

and find a way off this crazy island.

And also find a body,

thanks to Edison with antlers over here.

Yes, it's remarkable.

Truly, it is.

Not only does the thing spot the talents,

it's actually switching the bodies.

- Totally. - Wally, what possessed you

to do this? You could have died.

That might have been better.

Look at all of those pesky little feet, slimy skin.

I can't even look at you.

Thanks.

Don't be so pessimistic.

Surprises are a part of the scientific process.

Science can do anything when it puts its mind to it.

Wally, we picked you some food.

Let them dry first.

You're too kind.

Hey, come on, go ahead and try it.

Does he like it?

Oh, it's just great.

All right.

We'll bring you more later, there's lots.

He didn't die.

Looks like I lost the bet,

they're not poisonous.

- Lake time. - Finally.

Great. Time to stretch.

And you, don't you dare change yourself

into something else... or else!

Huh? Those are strange animal tracks.

What kind of animal has tires for feet?

Hmm.

Wally.

Wally, you're a caterpillar, right?

How kind of you to notice.

So, do you suppose

you're going to pupate and stuff?

That's gross.

I'll try to control myself.

Well, if I were you, Wally,

I wouldn't be quite so confident.

It's all very well to say that

you'll try to control yourself,

but pupation is involuntary.

So what does that mean?

Oh, a complete rebirth.

Though, once that happens,

I can't guarantee that the reverse body swap will work.

You're not exactly under warranty.

What? Why?

Why me?

Why am I always the punchline?

Oh, it's all because of your Improve-riser,

it made me think I could be better

like everybody else, I was fine

being just Wally.

I was used to it, can't you see?

Used to it.

I want my life back.

Grab him.

He's going down the hill.

- Wally. - I can't swim.

Someone help me.

I'm too scared to die.

Oh, wait for us.

Wally, don't worry,

we'll get you.

Hurry it up.

Whoa!

- Berry. - What?

Got it.

I'm losing it.

Krash, thank you.

Finally, it's all over.

No.

Oh, it's not easy being green,

or a caterpillar, or trapped in a jar

floating down a river.

I'm a sheep, mom.

I'm always wearing a sweater.

Just stay still, maybe he won't see me.

Maybe he'll go away.

Ah, phew.

Things are finally... aaah!

Why am I so irresistible to seafood?

Oh, no, not you again.

Man, it's all right.

Not the jar.

Oh, no, where is it?

Where?

Why am I so tasty?

Oh, that rock...

How do I get out?

Oh, I take it back.

I like the fish better.

Come on, Wally, pump those caterpillar legs.

Well, at least there's no spider...

What's that?

Oh, I don't... well, I don't know what that is.

I'm hallucinating.

You can't possibly be real, right?

Stay away. I'm extremely poisonous.

What do you mean strange?

What do you mean strange? Come see.

How far is it?

Shh. It's right...

- Huh? - ...there.

Looks like someone was sleepwalking

and cut our grass.

No.

Then, what... What is it?

There.

- It's... - A giant cotton ball?

No.

It's him.

I never thought I'd live to see this moment.

Hello? Anyone?

Anyone that doesn't wanna eat me, I mean.

Hi, there. Nice day.

No, sorry.

Terrible day.

What's happening?

Diesel,

so this is supposed to be

- the ancient Chief's crypt? - Yes.

More like the ancient Chief's dump.

Where's all the gold and the shiny stones, huh?

What was he Chief of?

The neighborhood landfill?

Oh, come on, Lara, don't start with that now, please.

Start what?

This nonsense started seven crypts ago.

Each one is empty as your rock hard cranium.

My mom told me to steer clear of half-baked Indiana Jones-es,

but did I listen? No.

Hey, it's a really nice vase.

Or a chamber pot, gorgeous one though.

Get that skanky thing out of my face.

We're treasure hunters, not junk dealers.

Aye, more treasures for yours truly.

There you go.

It's time to blow this candy stand.

- Wally. - Wally.

- Wally. - Wa... huh?

Wally, hey, is that you? Hey, buddy boy.

Here you go, little pal.

Oh, easy, fella.

Ow.

Ungrateful worm. I ought to...

Hang on, gang.

Does anyone have an odd feeling at the moment?

Yeah, my tushy fell asleep.

Phew, thanks for asking.

Whoa.

Oh.

Oh, somebody help.

Help.

Let me go.

A village?

Well, I'll be a pickled pot roast.

Wisest of the rulers,

he who communes with the spirits.

Hey.

Hey, I'm talking to you, King.

Hey, everyone.

This is a pretty righteous party.

Love the beat, right? Pop.

Forgive me, but there's no time for beats.

He has come for real.

He has come? What you talking about?

The Golden Dragon.

What?

Well, that's great.

I was not expecting him yet.

Hey, guys, great news.

The Golden Dragon showed up, yeehaw.

Yes.

I never thought I'd live to see this moment.

Okay. Rock it.

Now hit us with that all hail thingy.

All hail the great

and powerful

Golden Dragon.

He who shines like the yellow sun

and whose awesome power is without limits.

- Yes. - Golden Dragon...

The prophecy is coming true.

He has come.

What am I looking at, hmm?

An aboriginal cult built around some kind of idol,

undoubtedly some strange figure,

the likes of which we've never seen.

Hail Golden Dragon.

Call me crazy, but doesn't that look a lot like...

Hail The Golden Dragon.

Hail The Golden Dragon.

Hail The Golden Dragon.

He's so charming and regal

- and handsome. - So magnificent.

The prophecy is coming true.

At last, we are saved.

Well, that's just lovely.

We got an international conflict on our hands.

Now that he's a deity, they certainly

won't just hand him over to us.

I think the potential for success

marginally outweighs the anticipated risk.

I also think I might fall out of this tree.

Look at him.

What a gorgeous couple he and my daughter

are going to make.

I've never been so proud.

- Isn't she cute? - I'm afraid, sir,

that the Golden Dragon has a higher purpose than that.

He can have his cake and eat it, too.

Go find out his marital status

and be subtle, we wouldn't wanna spook him.

As you wish, sir.

Though the Dragon may not actually speak,

or so it seems.

Huh, hmm.

Lara, we've been searching

with this contraption for hours.

It's not my fault there's no burial crypts

left in this jungle.

Keep whining, and there'll be at least one.

Now keep looking.

We're not quitting till we strike it big.

Says you. I've had it.

Let's pack up and hit the road.

No, you can't do that.

What potato was that?

Diesel, how many times have I said,

cut out the trash collecting?

Now we've got a haunted chamber pot.

I think it's Satan!

Huh?

Hello.

Kill it.

- Whoa. - No, leave it behind.

Whoa.

I'm just a bighorn sheep trapped in a bug's body.

See? Totally normal.

I have references.

- No. - What happened?

- To get to know each other. - Hey, you caught him.

Whoa. Wait a minute.

- Stop. - You got him.

Oh, boy. Is it...?

Die.

Huh?

Oh, please believe me,

I'm a sheep.

That's so funny.

I can swear that fish is talking.

And that's how I lost my body

and my friends in that order.

I can't go on like this.

It's cold without wool.

I need your help to get my body back.

Now let me ask you something,

because I was wondering,

do we look like a charity for freaks of science?

Um, no. I guess you don't.

Good, because if we were, we'd be broke.

Go find some other idiots.

Or some other body.

Oh, no. My pupation is starting.

Help me, help me.

Help.

I could use some help, too, honey, financially.

I can't control it.

Lara, he can't control it.

Hurry. We should call somebody,

the pupae brigade or NASA.

This almost makes up for not having WIFI.

Diesel.

Lara, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

When do we go in?

I knew you'd come around.

Just, can we hurry up?

I'm pupating.

I can't shake the feeling

- that we're missing something. - Forget it.

I'll tell you what we're missing.

Native moves.

Remember, you gotta blend in

with the crowd.

Flaunt it.

Come on. Jazz toe.

Oh.

It's unbelievable.

We are here sorting bugs,

and they decide they've got to go start a boy band,

but our opinion doesn't count.

We're just < fräuleins >.

Yup, that's the way they always treat us girls.

It just seem to be our fate.

Fate my tail.

This job is as disgusting as it is pointless.

Wally.

Wally.

Wally.

Dokko, what's with this makeup?

I'm itchy all over.

I really can't see why.

I didn't use that much poison ivy.

All right, guys.

It's show time.

Next load of fruit.

Keep it coming. Pick it up.

The Golden Dragon's mission will require a lot of energy.

Let's do this.

Keep moving.

Act natural.

Hmm?

That was strange.

Keep it up, guys.

Look for a chance to fan out.

Now's our moment. Move it.

Oh, gosh.

Get ready to rush him.

Wait for my signal.

Itchy, so itchy.

Keep it together, Berry.

I'm trying, I'm trying.

Imposters.

Seize the strangers.

Told you.

I think they might have caught onto us.

It's starting, pupating.

I'm starting to grow a cocoon.

Well, do it quietly.

Easy for you to say.

You only ever had one body.

Oh, will you just man up,

you scaredy caterpillar.

I won't be a caterpillar for long if this continues.

Can't this thing go any faster?

Well, calm down.

Hey, what's that on your back?

- Are those wings? - What? Where?

Huh? Get them off, get them off.

Relax, I'm just kidding,

you little green hot dog.

Here we are.

See, we're not from around here.

No, but we do come in peace.

Yeah, to pay our respects

to the great and powerful

Golden Dragon.

* It is the time... *

* Pleasing just like the sun... *

* He's come at last *

* The golden one... *

* Came from the sky with the fire in his gut *

* Proven that the gecko and the grasses eat at night *

* To save this world that's why he came *

* < Burning through your heart > < like a fluffy-uffy flame > *

* Golden, Golden Dragon *

* Good God y'all *

* Can you feel me? *

* Golden Dragon, yeah, Golden Dragon, yeah *

* Golden Dragon, yeah, Golden Dragon, yeah *

* Dragon, woo *

* Dragon, woo *

Hey, you like it?

* Golden Dragon *

Release them,

true believers.

Release them.

Follow me.

What are you waiting for?

We're the ones carrying Wally's body.

What are you doing?

I'm navigating. Starboard ten degrees.

Krash, wait for us.

Everyone else's costume riding up?

Let's take a breather.

A smart move,

- very smart. - We're dead.

Decided to see the library while you're here?

Oh, the library? Oh, yeah.

You guys got good taste.

Hmm, yes, indeed.

Yeah, we can't wait.

Alec, go on and give them the whole mini tour.

- Huh? - Uh-hmm.

You know how I love your mini tour.

You're the best.

Well, if I must.

The prophecy set in stone

by our ancestors of old

speaks of the coming

of The Golden Dragon.

Notice the delicate carving work

and the striking realism

of the painting.

- Huh? - It's Wally.

Well, I mean, The Gold Dragon.

What a likeness.

No, that's where an old hunk of cheese hit the wall.

This is it.

Hmm.

Would you look at that,

it's beautiful.

I know, right?

Hey, I like you guys.

By the way, are any of you single?

Because I got a daughter, and she's as single as they come.

I have... oh, as our hearts,

belong to the Golden Dragon.

We've all taken a vow of celibacy.

Not my day.

That's right.

Shall we move on to the next exhibit?

The prophecy says the Golden Dragon's arrival

will bring great joy

followed by glee,

elation, delight, slight dizziness,

and finally, bliss,

which we are all experiencing now.

Yeah, yeah, I agree. So his work here is done,

and off he goes on his way. Congrats.

Not congrats.

For what follows next

is no less than unspeakable horror.

But the next part of the prophecy is broken off.

So, nobody knows exactly what this unspeakable horror is.

But we shall indeed be saved

from even this by the great and wise

Golden Dragon.

A comfort to know you're in good hands.

All right. This is not looking good.

First of all, the place has these high rock walls,

and the worms' carcass is right in the middle, here.

Plus, he's surrounded by insane natives

and lookouts in towers here,

here, and here, all with poison-tip spears.

Oh, great. Got it.

So, when do we all get moving?

Shut up, alien.

I am trying to convey

that this is not a two-person job

we got here.

Two person?

There are three.

You forgot Lara.

I've had enough of you, hot dog.

Why don't you just stick a pineapple in it,

and fly off, and save your own sorry body?

Huh, that could work.

This is the worst idea in the history

of terrible ideas.

Oh.

If sheep were meant to fly,

we would have big, fluffy wings.

Oh, oh, this is insane.

Oh.

Cut the screaming. Over.

Oh, this plan makes no sense.

Of course, it does.

Just take that pineapple near the body,

and it's a done deal, baby.

Oh, I'm about to be killed

by a tree, a monstrous, evil tree.

Don't do that. Just turn it.

Turn it to the side.

But how?

Actually, I have no idea.

Oh.

Oh, well, so much for that plan.

Ha. Take that, tree.

Score one, Wally.

Yeah.

Jeepers, you had us worried,

you grubby little dork.

I'm flying.

You hear me? I'm flying.

Yay.

Hot Dog to base.

No, scratch that.

From this point on, you can call me

Captain Larvo.

Settle down up there.

Yes, with purpose, he'll soar,

hear him bark, hear him roar

that amazing

Captain Larvo.

Come on, Gary, get with it.

Oh, come on.

It's the middle of the night.

I need my beauty sleep.

No kidding.

Shh, shh, quiet everyone.

All right. Now, can it.

Good, everyone's sound asleep.

Yeah. And they got the right idea.

You go, I'll just be leaning right here.

Oh.

No, no, no, no, no.

Killer drum solo, dude.

Rock on.

Okay. Now I'm awake.

All right, guys.

Let's get us a Golden Dragon.

Hmm.

Captain Larvo to base.

This place is a lot darker at night for some reason.

- Over. - < Quit the whining >.

- < Over >. - Quitting the whining.

- Over. - < Roger that >.

Over.

Can I say something other than over?

Over.

- Oh. - Shh, quiet.

Don't step on the zealots.

- Grab it and run. - No running.

You'll drop it. Stroll.

Sound the alarm.

Do we have an alarm?

Build an alarm.

Sorry about that.

Oh, oh, green alert.

The natives are taking him away.

I mean, me... I mean, help.

When in doubt, blow things up.

You crazy?

We need that body.

Listen, Captain Lard for Brains,

do not wimp out now!

Okay, fine. I guess I'll try.

Oh.

Go, go, go, go, go. Come on, let's move it, move it.

Now pick it up with scamper.

I prefer a trot.

Pineapple away.

Feel the wrath of my mighty pineapple.

Hey.

Oh, heading back victorious

from a dangerous mission.

Oh, that's a good feeling.

Yeah, Wally just feels lighter and lighter.

Unless we got stronger.

Me manly.

What is this strange object?

Huh?

Well, I'll be.

Uh-oh, that pineapple is trying to steal Wally.

Oh, after it.

- Go. - Go.

Trey, can you make it?

- Follow that fruit. - I've been spotted.

- What should I do? - Find a back way out.

Roger, you got it.

No, this way.

Sorry.

Track practice.

Thanks.

Base, come in base.

Huh? Oh, great.

Just what I needed. A dropped call.

All right, Captain Larvo.

You're on your own.

Stop.

Son of a sheep.

Attention, passenger.

We are ready for take-off.

Oh, after all that...

Oh, he...

No.

All right.

What did you do with the Golden Dragon,

hmm?

You wouldn't believe us if we told you, bub.

Huh?

Hi, honeys. I'm home.

I'm telling you, something's gone wrong.

All they had to do was steal Wally's body

from a tribe of savage natives.

How long can that take?

Patience, my dear.

Patience. It's a woman's finest virtue.

Three years ago, I asked Berry

to hammer a nail to hang my pot holder.

Think he's gotten around to it?

That's what I'm saying.

How long are we supposed to wait? Sister...

it's time to hammer some nails.

Hmm?

Oh, yeah,

we're gonna hammer some nails, alright.

Look at it, it's so beautiful.

- Yeah. - And, oh...

I love antiques,

especially the ones worth a butt-load.

I'll tell you, spirits are flying.

I bank left, they're there.

I bank right. They're still there.

So I climb,

climbing, and climbing,

and, I did it.

I did it all by myself without any Improve-riser at all,

just me, just Wally.

Huh? Huh?

And I even got my body.

Woohoo.

Okay. Let's do this, you guys.

It's time to fire it up.

What do you say?

Aha, cool. So, how do you work this thing?

First, you pull the little lever there,

then you turn the knob till the power's at maximum,

- and then you're all set. - < Uh-hmm, uh-hmm >.

Just press that button on top.

Okay, got it. Hang on.

Good-bye, old Wally.

Hello, new and improved Wally.

Bullseye.

How was it?

Strange

and woozy.

But I'm still a caterpillar.

You worked the machine wrong.

But, no, no, wait. You were supposed to focus

the beam at me.

Oh, oh,

I have this horrible compunction to go

and make these natives give me all their gold.

All of it.

How could they refuse the needs

of their very own god?

Yeah. They can never deny you,

now that you're such a beautiful deity.

Oh, are you saying I look better as a sheep?

No, no. Totally not saying that at all.

Oh, you are so sleeping in the garbage can tonight.

- You're unbelievable. - You used me.

But I got to admit,

that loser caterpillar bought it all.

Hold it right there.

I won't let you use my body for criminal activities,

except cheating at board games.

Do you understand me?

Huh? Do you?

- He ain't fooling. - So, hear me roar, darn it.

Aah. Aaaah!

Got him!

We don't negotiate with terrorists,

especially those that have been brainwashed!

And you're telling us all,

the Golden Dragon

is a caterpillar?

Yeah, yeah. A squishy, little caterpillar.

- Uh-hmm. - Right.

Yeah. And flying pineapples.

But the caterpillar was totally into it.

What? I've never heard more obnoxious blasphemy.

You have defiled our god,

the memory of our greatest ancestors,

our very culture.

Huh? Huh?

Oh.

He has returned.

All hail the Golden Dragon.

He has returned.

What are you waiting for?

Get over there and start pampering him.

Helper.

Somebody give him a pineapple.

We are saved.

The greedy worm has returned.

Yeah, I guess, there's no need to execute all of us now.

Oh, I was dreaming about pudding.

I was a good party guest, I think.

Your worshipfulness Golden Dragon.

Allow us to present you

with a token of our worthiness and respect.

The Golden, Golden Dragon.

Now, that's what I'm talking about.

Come to mama, golden boy.

It worked.

He speaks.

- He speaks. - He speaks?

He speaks.

- He speaks. - The Golden Dragon speaks.

Oh, oh.

Oh, who was I kidding?

Captain Larvo?

More like Captain Blunder

or Can't Man, except, you know, sheep.

No, caterpillar, whatever.

Now, you can just call me The Incredible Suck.

Come now, caterpillar,

one more bitey-witey.

Gotta keep up our strength.

Can this get any weirder?

Here comes the choo-choo

into the face-face.

- Diesel. - Huh?

- Diesel. - Huh? Hello?

Guess what these mental midgets have done.

They melted all the gold into a giant chunk.

This thing is so big, we're gonna have to use the crane.

And hurry up.

This body smells terrible.

We've always believed in the Golden Dragon.

Unlike some trash talking weirdies.

And now,

could you save us from the deathly terror?

Yeah. What's that thing,

two tons, closer to three?

Now, the worm is talking. Am I hearing things?

- Maybe it's Wally again. - Huh?

Wally? Is it you?

Wally, Wally, Wally.

- It's us. - Hey. Can you hear us?

Wally. Wally.

What the huh?

It's my friends.

All right, Wally, enough.

Time for you to stop joking

and tell these folks you're not the Golden Dragon.

Do it. Go.

Huh?

* < Gold, gold >, < goldy gold > *

* < Lot s of gold > *

Looks like the execution's back on.

Hey, let's get this blasphemer barbecue going.

Your Golden Dragon loves you

and you, and you, and you,

and your gold.

Oh, yeah.

Bring it. Boom-shaka-shaka- shaka-boom.

Huh? I'm free.

Hey. Hey, don't eat that.

Ready? And snatch.

Oh, no.

- Whoa. - Bad idea.

Well, bless my bullion.

Would you look at that.

What's going on?

Reverse!

Forward!

Lara, help me!

This must stop. This must stop.

Diesel. Diesel.

You stop.

I'm right here.

Don't ignore me.

I can hear you ignoring me.

Lara?

Whoa.

I'm coming. I'm coming.

I'm coming.

Almost there. Oh, sorry.

I'm so sorry.

Back off. Hey.

Get off of there.

Whoa.

I thought they were just going to burn us.

This is the appetizer.

Diesel.

Lara.

Lara? Huh?

It's not my fault, Lara.

It was Hotdog. I swear.

Look, those balls of blasphemy

are about to steal the Golden Dragon.

It wasn't us this time, huh?

- Let's move on out. - Get the defilers.

Don't let them get away.

We hit the jackpot.

- Stop. - Huh?

Hey, I said stop.

Huh, here's your stop, Hotdog.

No.

This is the best party ever.

I love you, guys.

Hop, nice friend giant, hop!

Is there a seatbelt around here?

Let's go.

Yee-hah.

Ride it, ribbit. Yeah.

Whoa.

It is...

the deathly terror.

Please save us.

Please, Golden Dragon.

Hey, did you feed my body?

You know it.

There's nothing to fear but the spear itself.

With this treasure,

we can live a life of leisure for like, uh,

- three months. - You're thinking small.

With that body swapper doohickey,

we can steal all the gold in the world.

Banzai.

Huh?

Yes, finally.

Diesel.

- Lara? - Wally.

Oh, no.

No.

That's for my throwing my friends around, buddy.

The defilers are trying to throw off their tracks.

Now, what do we do?

Quit staring at me and stop that Hotdog, dingbat.

Right, right.

Do it.

Down right here.

No.

What happened now?

I'm coming back for you, guys.

Diesel, you're not just a dingbat,

you're the king of the dingbats.

What a lovely,

whoa, thing to say.

My body.

You're beautiful as always.

I like that.

- That's cheese. - Stop him.

You got it.

Take that.

Wait. Now who am I?

Hands off my curly carcass.

Diesel, where are you?

Over here. Hey, Hotdog.

And Captain Larvo's driving.

Diesel, which one are you?

Sheep, and bang!

Looks like the worst part

of the ancient prophecy

is starting to happen.

- Lara. - Oh, geez,

I'm a bug again.

You kids, stop fighting.

No, not a thing. Get away.

Keep driving.

Don't give up.

Berry doesn't give up.

I got this.

Help us, please.

Just hold the wheel.

You mean this big bango?

Hey, hey,

we're losing cargo.

Whoa, whoa.

Whoa, whoa.

Help.

Somebody.

Son of a gun.

Why is it only in ancient legends

that the lifesaving dragon actually appear?

Hang in there, guys.

What?

No. No, no, no.

Not now.

Oh, please, please not now.

Oh.

No, not now.

Not now.

No, no, not now.

No.

Help.

- Hot, hot, hot, hot. - Oh, somebody.

My friends, it's seems it's time

for the final curtain to fall.

Hold on tight.

I'm coming.

- What? - It's Wally.

I'm coming.

I'll try to jimmy the the lock.

It's all over.

Got to keep it, Berry.

Oh.

Wally, you'll never get it.

A bug just doesn't have the necessary strength.

That's a theory worth testing, Dokko.

Help us, Golden Dragon.

Come on, from the diaphragm.

Help us, Golden Dragon.

Help us, Golden Dragon.

Help us Golden Dragon.

Help us...

Oh.

Guys, I think Chiko's on fire.

Just my feet.

Astonishing.

Wally did it.

Did I get something right?

Yes, Wally.

You saved us all.

Sweet little disgusting slumped worth.

- Well, now. - Huh?

You boys look like you can use a lift.

If you're all finished with your sonnet, that is.

I tweak my beak.

< Fräuleins > do fly.

Nice going there, ladies.

That's even nuttier than the flying pineapple incident.

Hey, hey.

You boys,

you better hold on to your metaphorical acts.

Because this is what it sounds like when pigs fly.

Well, I did not see this coming.

What on earth are they doing down there?

Our only hope of surviving this is the Golden Dragon.

So come on and let him really hear you.

That is not going to work.

Why are they just sitting there? Why aren't they running?

Because they're waiting to be saved

by the Golden Dragon.

Are they all completely deranged?

Hey, hey,

primitive villagers,

you can't just sit there

and wait for the Golden Dragon

to come and save you.

That's not how it works.

He only helps those who help themselves.

So get yourselves up off the ground

and save yourselves.

It's what the Golden Dragon would want.

Can anybody make out what the blasphemers are saying?

Listen to Wally.

I think they're telling us it's the finale.

Wowzers, the spirits just sent me

one humdinger of a dream,

oh, my goodness.

I was dreaming of eating pudding,

of course, but the pudding looked like the Golden Dragon.

And you know what that Golden Pudding Dragon said?

He said, "Just listen to Wally

and fend for yourselves,

and then eat me, I'm a yummy pudding"

or something like that, yeah.

Ah, can I take one teensy-eensy

little catnap without the world ending?

Fend for yourselves,

like the Golden Pudding Dragon said.

I don't need a driving lesson right now.

But you're driving like a cub scout.

Move it, brothers. Hurry up, move it.

The gold, protect the gold.

I'm driving, you protect the gold.

You can't just sit there and wait.

Move it, move it.

Ah, keep it moving, sweet cakes.

What is it?

You guys.

My mother warned me.

Oh.

Look up in the sky, it's a bird.

It's some kind of man-made flying device.

It's the Golden Dragon.

The dragon saved us.

We've just witnessed an ancient prophecy come true.

Wow.

Heads up, guys, there's some kind

of object at 12:00.

There you are, you greedy worm.

Wally, it's your body.

Yeah. Ain't that something?

Hey, Wally?

Can you hear me?

Wally.

Stay with us, buddy, hurry, hurry, hurry.

Stop, hold it, oh.

Quick, run, run, run, run,

come on, come on, come on.

Hang in there, Wally, okay,

- we're coming. - Coming up on your body, buddy.

Activate.

Now, back everyone, back.

I don't understand.

It should be activating.

- What happens? - Maybe it's the battery.

The battery's fine.

It just isn't working.

Wally, we'll be right with you.

Don't move.

Nobody panic, just nobody panic.

Just one minute.

- God, we don't have a minute. - Everything is fine.

Doohickey's intact. Phase widget.

- Beam gizmo? - Ah, for the love of peace,

just fix it.

Get the heating pad.

They got us for the day.

Attach this to that... Oh...

It's...

There's no time left,

this is it, guys.

Holy carrot, come on.

He's passing out.

- Carlin, do something. - Oh, I can't even watch this.

What have we done wrong?

Coming through.

Look at you, guys.

What, is the sky falling?

What, you act like you've never seen

a body-jacking butterfly before?

It's just like I could still hear his voice.

Can somebody tell me

why I feel like I just got smacked

on the head really hard by a bear?

Boy, if that don't take the cake.

Wally.

We thought that you had flown away forever.

Oh, no way. Flying's for the birds.

Son of a sheep.

Look, I'm really sorry

I caused all this trouble.

Which is never going to stop.

Are you referring to this worthless hunk of junk?

The improve-riser?

Oh, stop it.

I thought that I had invented something unique.

But it turns out that there is a little improve-riser

inside every last one of us.

So Chiko can weed my tulip garden

just as good as me?

Hallelujah.

So, yeah, I'm just Wally,

and I'll never be as clever

and nimble as Krash,

or strong as Berry,

or as smart as Dokko,

but watch out world,

machine or not,

Wally the sheep has been improve-rised

and mutton's never gonna be

the same again.

Nein, nein, nein,

not now, you stupid wreck of metal.

Relax, this hunk of metal is fine.

< Thank you all >, < for choosing > Fräulein < air >.

Now, Pin, get to work.

Ja, ja, tea, coffee, tea, coffee?

Ugh, my mother warned me

that you were the biggest dingbat

in the long sad history of dingbats.

How could you call me that?

I'm the pretty one now.

Thank you for making me hate my own face.

And that's mine,

King Dingbat.

Why didn't I listen to my mother?

Huh?

Well, technically, at this point,

she's my mother.

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