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1
00:01:38,054 --> 00:01:40,488
Shit! Where are we going?
2
00:01:40,556 --> 00:01:42,820
- How did you get in my car?
- What?
3
00:01:42,892 --> 00:01:45,258
You said I could sleep here.
4
00:01:45,328 --> 00:01:47,853
- You said it was comfortable too.
- No!
5
00:01:47,930 --> 00:01:50,296
- You didn't say that?
- No. Get out.
6
00:01:50,366 --> 00:01:54,166
- This is crap. Come on!
- Get out. I'm late.
7
00:01:54,237 --> 00:01:57,070
Stop pulling.
You're hurting me.
8
00:01:57,139 --> 00:01:59,437
You know what you could do?
Eat it!
9
00:01:59,508 --> 00:02:01,738
- You lied, man.
- Yeah, yeah.
10
00:02:01,811 --> 00:02:04,075
- That's great.
- F you, pal.
11
00:02:04,146 --> 00:02:06,637
F you, buddy!
12
00:02:25,134 --> 00:02:26,761
Hey! Hey!
13
00:02:26,836 --> 00:02:28,861
I'm looking for Cheerful Place.
14
00:02:33,276 --> 00:02:35,870
- What are you looking for?
- Cheerful Place.
15
00:02:35,945 --> 00:02:37,435
Isn't it right there?
16
00:02:42,318 --> 00:02:43,580
Jesus, no.
17
00:02:43,653 --> 00:02:45,951
Christ Almighty.
18
00:02:46,022 --> 00:02:47,284
Oh, fuck.
19
00:03:02,605 --> 00:03:06,268
Don't worry, kids.
Flappy's here!
20
00:03:08,411 --> 00:03:10,743
Hurry up, we're gonna miss it.
21
00:03:10,813 --> 00:03:12,678
I'm trying!
22
00:03:15,718 --> 00:03:17,913
Get the hell off of me!
23
00:03:17,987 --> 00:03:20,979
There's no reason for all this.
We can handle this ourselves.
24
00:03:21,057 --> 00:03:23,218
It was an accident.
25
00:03:23,292 --> 00:03:25,123
It's a goddamn misunderstanding.
26
00:03:25,194 --> 00:03:29,062
Jill, would you tell them
we can handle this ourselves?
27
00:03:29,131 --> 00:03:32,191
What the fuck are you looking at?
28
00:03:32,268 --> 00:03:35,328
It's your call.
You give me the say-so, he's gone.
29
00:03:35,404 --> 00:03:37,668
Excuse me!
Perhaps you didn't hear me.
30
00:03:37,740 --> 00:03:41,471
For Christ's sakes, Jill,
open up your mouth!
31
00:03:47,316 --> 00:03:49,784
- Could you take him away?
- What?!
32
00:03:49,852 --> 00:03:53,049
- Get up!
- Just for a while, Travis.
33
00:03:53,122 --> 00:03:57,456
- Just until you cool down.
- You coerced her into saying that!
34
00:03:57,526 --> 00:04:00,893
- Simmer down, shitbag!
- Fine. Come on, you bitch!
35
00:04:00,963 --> 00:04:04,831
- Stop!
- Take him away already!
36
00:04:04,900 --> 00:04:06,094
Come on.
37
00:04:10,272 --> 00:04:12,365
Come on, get in there.
38
00:04:12,441 --> 00:04:14,204
Get in there.
39
00:04:14,276 --> 00:04:15,607
Mrs. Lee?
40
00:04:17,313 --> 00:04:19,975
- I'm so sorry.
- Oh, no. Don't be.
41
00:04:20,049 --> 00:04:21,880
If you can wait,
I'll get you your money.
42
00:04:21,951 --> 00:04:24,749
- Is he giving you a hard time?
- No.
43
00:04:24,820 --> 00:04:28,312
- Not at all.
- Call me if you need anything.
44
00:04:30,426 --> 00:04:32,553
- The money...
- No. Don't.
45
00:04:32,628 --> 00:04:36,462
I understand. You won't be too old
for a clown next year.
46
00:04:36,532 --> 00:04:39,330
- Will I, Mommy?
- No.
47
00:04:40,436 --> 00:04:43,200
There it is, then.
Same time next year, Mom?
48
00:04:43,272 --> 00:04:46,207
- Sure. Thank you, Mr...
- Flappy.
49
00:04:46,275 --> 00:04:48,436
It's the illusion.
It's for the kids.
50
00:04:50,112 --> 00:04:51,807
I almost forgot.
51
00:04:51,881 --> 00:04:53,815
They would have taken away
my clown license
52
00:04:53,883 --> 00:04:55,544
if I'd let this one slip by.
53
00:04:55,618 --> 00:04:57,609
- You wouldn't rat on me, though?
- No.
54
00:04:57,686 --> 00:04:59,119
Here!
55
00:05:00,489 --> 00:05:02,889
And eat an extra
piece of cake for Flappy.
56
00:05:02,958 --> 00:05:05,222
You need it more than I do.
57
00:05:16,539 --> 00:05:20,100
- Twice in one day, loser!
- Fuck you, bastard!
58
00:05:37,593 --> 00:05:39,925
Free refill, please!
59
00:05:39,995 --> 00:05:42,088
Aren't you supposed
to be at a gig today?
60
00:05:42,164 --> 00:05:45,691
Well, it was canceled
at the zero hour.
61
00:05:45,768 --> 00:05:48,328
No wonder you are so damned testy.
What happened?
62
00:05:48,404 --> 00:05:51,339
The abridged version goes
something like this...
63
00:05:51,407 --> 00:05:53,500
will you cut it out?!
64
00:05:53,576 --> 00:05:56,340
Husband pounds wife.
Wife screams.
65
00:05:56,412 --> 00:05:59,279
Neighbors call cops.
Cops come, bust him.
66
00:05:59,348 --> 00:06:01,407
- The party's over.
- Raw deal.
67
00:06:01,484 --> 00:06:03,748
You got the cash, though?
68
00:06:03,819 --> 00:06:06,253
She didn't pay you?
Fuck that shit.
69
00:06:06,322 --> 00:06:08,415
Time is money,
spousal abuse or not.
70
00:06:08,491 --> 00:06:11,051
I'd be in small claims court,
if I were you.
71
00:06:11,126 --> 00:06:13,856
- Humanitarian to the last.
- Never mind her.
72
00:06:13,929 --> 00:06:15,590
I almost forgot the big news.
73
00:06:15,664 --> 00:06:18,827
- My grandmother kicked me out.
- I've heard this before.
74
00:06:18,901 --> 00:06:20,391
She was pretty official
about it this time.
75
00:06:20,469 --> 00:06:24,098
Her lawyer sent me a letter saying
she doesn't want me around anymore
76
00:06:24,173 --> 00:06:27,802
because I don't pay bills
or get up before 12:00.
77
00:06:27,877 --> 00:06:29,970
- Nice.
- She can bite me anyway.
78
00:06:30,045 --> 00:06:32,775
I'll be flying solo soon.
I got a job.
79
00:06:32,848 --> 00:06:33,940
Where?
80
00:06:34,016 --> 00:06:36,814
Tuott the Basehead hooked me up
with Suds 'N' Stuff over the weekend.
81
00:06:36,886 --> 00:06:39,411
Watch yourself
on that corporate ladder.
82
00:06:39,488 --> 00:06:42,218
Listen to this bull.
Is that your limo outside?
83
00:06:42,291 --> 00:06:44,122
Driving around
in that little shitbox.
84
00:06:44,193 --> 00:06:46,821
That shitbox totes
your ass to and fro.
85
00:06:46,896 --> 00:06:51,196
You walk around with empty pockets
like some poor-ass church mouse.
86
00:06:51,267 --> 00:06:53,895
You know you need the extra cash.
Come work with me.
87
00:06:53,969 --> 00:06:56,199
- You get your own jumpsuit.
- No, thanks.
88
00:06:56,272 --> 00:06:58,706
That's how it starts.
Crappy job here, crappy job there,
89
00:06:58,774 --> 00:07:00,605
next thing you know,
you're 70 years old,
90
00:07:00,676 --> 00:07:03,338
living on the dole
wondering where your life went,
91
00:07:03,412 --> 00:07:06,347
and your best friend comes
cable-ready with a remote.
92
00:07:06,415 --> 00:07:08,815
That's beneath even you.
93
00:07:09,885 --> 00:07:12,149
- What's up your ass?
- Nothing.
94
00:07:12,221 --> 00:07:13,813
Shine bumpers if you want.
95
00:07:13,889 --> 00:07:16,050
Nobody's stopping you.
I'm sure you'll do well.
96
00:07:16,125 --> 00:07:18,753
You're right. I should hinge
my future on dancing around
97
00:07:18,827 --> 00:07:22,558
like a mongoloid on a bad acid trip
for a bunch of spoiled dick-heads.
98
00:07:22,631 --> 00:07:24,997
- You think what I do is stupid?
- All I'm saying
99
00:07:25,067 --> 00:07:28,093
is your life expectations
as far as clowning is concerned
100
00:07:28,170 --> 00:07:31,071
are far-fetched, dare I say,
totally unrealistic.
101
00:07:31,140 --> 00:07:34,268
It's what I want to do.
And I believe things will work out,
102
00:07:34,343 --> 00:07:38,040
and one day I'll make a good living
at it. Clich�, but humor me.
103
00:07:38,113 --> 00:07:40,138
How long did it take
to build Rome?
104
00:07:40,215 --> 00:07:42,945
Your problem is, zero patience.
105
00:07:43,018 --> 00:07:47,011
I can see how the rise and fall
of Rome parallel your existence.
106
00:07:47,089 --> 00:07:48,249
You're barely surviving.
107
00:07:48,324 --> 00:07:50,087
The money you make...
sporadic at best.
108
00:07:50,159 --> 00:07:52,491
How much of your monthly take
goes for that nursing home?
109
00:07:52,561 --> 00:07:56,190
$200. But I only pay half,
'cause Uncle Sam picks up the rest.
110
00:07:56,265 --> 00:07:58,028
- How much do you make?
- It depends.
111
00:07:58,100 --> 00:08:00,660
I usually bring in...
112
00:08:00,736 --> 00:08:03,603
- maybe $500-$600.
- So, in other words, four.
113
00:08:03,672 --> 00:08:06,038
How do you pay rent,
car insurance and eat
114
00:08:06,108 --> 00:08:07,837
on 200 or 300 bucks a month?
115
00:08:07,910 --> 00:08:09,844
Mosier knocks
a couple of bucks off
116
00:08:09,912 --> 00:08:12,346
if I mow the lawn
or do some maintenance.
117
00:08:12,414 --> 00:08:16,248
Plus, to be honest, I don't exactly
pay insurance on that shitbox,
118
00:08:16,318 --> 00:08:17,808
as you so fondly referred to it.
119
00:08:17,886 --> 00:08:22,050
I'm in a quandary about
the resting home deal.
120
00:08:22,124 --> 00:08:24,115
Not for nothing, but your mom...
121
00:08:24,193 --> 00:08:26,058
- she's a bitch.
- Hey!
122
00:08:26,128 --> 00:08:27,686
That's my mom!
123
00:08:27,763 --> 00:08:29,492
My mother had a hard life.
124
00:08:29,565 --> 00:08:31,362
Her mother died
when she was three,
125
00:08:31,433 --> 00:08:33,628
and her father expected her
to take on the wifely duties...
126
00:08:33,702 --> 00:08:36,432
- all of them.
- I've heard this before.
127
00:08:36,505 --> 00:08:39,303
Why should you atone
for his shortcomings?
128
00:08:39,375 --> 00:08:42,208
- Plus, you call her names all the time.
- I know.
129
00:08:42,277 --> 00:08:45,804
But she's still my mom.
And there's a difference between
130
00:08:45,881 --> 00:08:48,042
calling your mother a bitch
and someone else saying it.
131
00:08:48,117 --> 00:08:51,780
Sorry. She's such a bitch.
132
00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:06,968
William, Sam Mosier.
133
00:09:07,036 --> 00:09:09,197
I don't want to be a nut-biter,
134
00:09:09,271 --> 00:09:11,603
but I'll need
some money from you soon.
135
00:09:11,674 --> 00:09:13,938
There's just not
that much grass to mow.
136
00:09:14,009 --> 00:09:15,203
Guess what,
137
00:09:15,277 --> 00:09:17,837
Mr. Flappy-the-Jerk-Off?
Your message sucks!
138
00:09:17,913 --> 00:09:20,177
- Clowns suck too.
- Tell him to eat shit.
139
00:09:22,084 --> 00:09:23,483
Pick up the phone!
140
00:09:23,552 --> 00:09:24,985
I know you're there!
141
00:09:25,054 --> 00:09:27,386
I want to thank you
for being so goddamn worthless!
142
00:09:27,456 --> 00:09:29,788
They are asking me
for the money you owe!
143
00:09:29,858 --> 00:09:32,383
They want to know why
the rent hasn't been paid
144
00:09:32,461 --> 00:09:35,555
for this fucking cesspool
you've thrown me in!
145
00:09:35,631 --> 00:09:38,327
Bring the money today!
146
00:09:38,400 --> 00:09:40,800
Now!
147
00:09:40,869 --> 00:09:42,962
You have no more messages.
148
00:09:45,274 --> 00:09:46,832
Do you mind?
149
00:09:46,909 --> 00:09:49,139
Rumor has it
that backseat's comfortable.
150
00:09:49,211 --> 00:09:50,803
Get away!
151
00:09:50,879 --> 00:09:52,904
What is he, your boss?
152
00:09:52,981 --> 00:09:55,211
- Are you his bitch?
- No!
153
00:10:01,223 --> 00:10:03,384
Who's ready for bingo?
154
00:10:03,459 --> 00:10:05,484
Are you ready for bingo?
155
00:10:05,561 --> 00:10:09,622
The fun starts at 7:00
in the cafeteria.
156
00:10:09,698 --> 00:10:12,223
Don't forget your markers.
157
00:10:29,451 --> 00:10:31,976
Excuse me, ladies.
158
00:10:32,054 --> 00:10:33,885
How rude.
159
00:10:42,531 --> 00:10:45,193
- Get I get you anything else?
- No, not unless
160
00:10:45,267 --> 00:10:48,259
- you have a cure for my rheumatism.
- I wish.
161
00:10:53,809 --> 00:10:55,800
Hi, Mom.
162
00:10:58,180 --> 00:11:00,876
It's my nap time.
Why don't you follow suit,
163
00:11:00,949 --> 00:11:02,814
and make like that
irritating little bitch?
164
00:11:02,885 --> 00:11:05,046
What are you talking about?
I just got here.
165
00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:09,614
I'm talking about you
being a source of embarrassment,
166
00:11:09,691 --> 00:11:11,488
a colossal disappointment!
167
00:11:11,560 --> 00:11:15,656
I wish I'd had the courage to take
that trip down the back alley.
168
00:11:15,731 --> 00:11:18,131
Come on.
I paid up some of the bill,
169
00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:20,794
so please,
can we have a nice visit?
170
00:11:20,869 --> 00:11:24,828
- Don't start with that.
- I am going to start.
171
00:11:24,907 --> 00:11:27,535
This room, if that's what
you want to call it,
172
00:11:27,609 --> 00:11:30,169
isn't provided
by some divine entity.
173
00:11:30,245 --> 00:11:33,146
I've had it up to here
with that bitch of a secretary,
174
00:11:33,215 --> 00:11:35,775
reminding me daily
that you're too stupid
175
00:11:35,851 --> 00:11:38,786
to remember that
I have to pay to live here.
176
00:11:38,854 --> 00:11:40,617
It's not
that I don't remember...
177
00:11:40,689 --> 00:11:44,284
Don't interrupt me. God damn it,
don't you dare contradict me!
178
00:11:44,359 --> 00:11:46,623
You show me
the respect I deserve.
179
00:11:46,695 --> 00:11:47,923
If your father were alive,
180
00:11:47,996 --> 00:11:50,328
I'd have him slap you
in your snotty little mouth.
181
00:11:50,399 --> 00:11:52,390
- Here we go.
- What did you say?!
182
00:11:52,467 --> 00:11:55,868
- How dare you? Get over here...
- Relax. I didn't mean it.
183
00:11:55,938 --> 00:11:58,998
- Get your ass over here!
- I won't let you hit me!
184
00:11:59,074 --> 00:12:01,542
Forget it, I'll leave
before that happens.
185
00:12:02,778 --> 00:12:06,714
Well, it wouldn't be
the first time, would it?
186
00:12:06,782 --> 00:12:09,148
That's always the way
it's been with you.
187
00:12:09,218 --> 00:12:11,584
Couldn't stand on your own two feet
to defend yourself,
188
00:12:11,653 --> 00:12:13,848
if your worthless
life depended on it.
189
00:12:13,922 --> 00:12:17,050
Run away, William.
It's your answer to everything.
190
00:12:18,227 --> 00:12:20,787
You don't have to stay!
191
00:12:21,864 --> 00:12:24,890
I know you don't want
to come to see me.
192
00:12:24,967 --> 00:12:26,935
Yes, I do.
193
00:12:27,002 --> 00:12:28,697
I like to come and see you.
194
00:12:28,770 --> 00:12:32,729
I just wish you'd relax a little
and not get so short-tempered.
195
00:12:33,809 --> 00:12:37,245
I get so lonely around here.
196
00:12:37,312 --> 00:12:39,610
Nobody talks to me.
197
00:12:40,682 --> 00:12:42,616
Nobody bothers with me at all.
198
00:12:42,684 --> 00:12:44,618
They have their own
little circles.
199
00:12:44,686 --> 00:12:46,654
They don't want
to know from anyone.
200
00:12:46,722 --> 00:12:49,486
- They think they're better than me.
- Come on, Mom.
201
00:12:49,558 --> 00:12:51,583
You know that's not true.
202
00:12:51,660 --> 00:12:54,424
So, suddenly, you're
some kind of big man?
203
00:12:54,496 --> 00:12:56,828
Not so big that you can
earn a decent living,
204
00:12:56,899 --> 00:12:58,628
let alone take care
of your own mother!
205
00:12:58,700 --> 00:13:01,828
I am so happy that God showed grace
enough to take your father away,
206
00:13:04,773 --> 00:13:07,970
- The account is nearly paid up...
- You know what you are?
207
00:13:08,043 --> 00:13:10,841
- A whole lot of nothing!
- I'm trying...
208
00:13:10,913 --> 00:13:13,211
Trying won't get you
through life!
209
00:13:13,282 --> 00:13:15,477
Actions will get you through it.
210
00:13:15,550 --> 00:13:17,381
I thought you'd have
learned that by now.
211
00:13:17,452 --> 00:13:19,886
- If your father...
- Enough about him!
212
00:13:19,955 --> 00:13:22,355
What do you have to canonize
that son of a bitch?!
213
00:13:22,424 --> 00:13:26,451
I know the way he was.
I know what you went through!
214
00:13:26,528 --> 00:13:29,964
I'm sick of listening
to how fucking great he was!
215
00:13:33,402 --> 00:13:35,393
I'm sorry.
216
00:13:35,470 --> 00:13:40,066
- I shouldn't have said that.
- Get out!
217
00:13:40,142 --> 00:13:42,610
It was out of line.
I apologize.
218
00:13:43,912 --> 00:13:46,676
I said, get the hell out!
219
00:13:46,748 --> 00:13:49,046
Oh God! Somebody...
220
00:13:49,117 --> 00:13:50,846
get him out of here!
221
00:13:50,919 --> 00:13:54,548
I can't stand to look at you.
Get the fuck out!
222
00:13:58,026 --> 00:14:00,494
Don't let him get away.
223
00:14:00,595 --> 00:14:02,961
You and me, go round to round,
Jersey style.
224
00:14:03,031 --> 00:14:05,295
Take it on, you smelly bitch.
225
00:14:06,969 --> 00:14:09,130
Hey, it's clowny!
226
00:14:09,204 --> 00:14:11,434
- Give me a dollar!
- Yeah, give him a dollar.
227
00:14:11,506 --> 00:14:14,566
Those boys giving you
some trouble, Willie?
228
00:14:14,643 --> 00:14:17,544
- Nothing I can't handle.
- Bunch of roughnecks.
229
00:14:17,612 --> 00:14:19,910
- Did you get my message?
- Yeah. I'm sorry.
230
00:14:19,982 --> 00:14:22,382
I lost a couple of jobs
this past week.
231
00:14:22,451 --> 00:14:26,615
Will, I need your help.
Somebody's stealing my utilities.
232
00:14:26,688 --> 00:14:29,680
- Oh yeah?
- Maybe you overheard something?
233
00:14:29,758 --> 00:14:32,556
No, I haven't.
But I'll let you know if I do.
234
00:14:33,895 --> 00:14:35,760
I know your word, Will.
235
00:15:15,937 --> 00:15:17,837
♪ I wish I was a fry cook ♪
236
00:15:17,906 --> 00:15:20,568
♪ Hurray, hurray. ♪
237
00:15:20,642 --> 00:15:23,736
"Parking attendants. " No.
238
00:15:24,813 --> 00:15:28,476
"Recreational Center
counselor. " No.
239
00:15:28,550 --> 00:15:31,815
"Office manager. " Hell no.
240
00:15:31,887 --> 00:15:36,450
No.
241
00:15:36,525 --> 00:15:38,015
And no.
242
00:15:44,332 --> 00:15:46,766
"Let me watch you
fuck my wife"?!
243
00:15:46,835 --> 00:15:48,826
"Her, deliciously plump.
244
00:15:48,904 --> 00:15:51,464
You, big and Black
with huge set. "
245
00:15:53,675 --> 00:15:56,166
"You supply
the bathroom brownies,
246
00:15:56,244 --> 00:15:58,178
I sample them. "
247
00:16:00,082 --> 00:16:03,074
"Why settle for less when you can
have three holes going?
248
00:16:03,151 --> 00:16:06,780
Call Katlyn for an unforgettable
bachelor party. "
249
00:16:06,855 --> 00:16:09,380
Sick, sick people.
250
00:16:13,895 --> 00:16:15,385
Bachelor parties.
251
00:16:34,082 --> 00:16:37,108
What's the occasion?
This place is fucking posh.
252
00:16:37,185 --> 00:16:40,450
What took you so long?
Why is your hair wet?
253
00:16:40,522 --> 00:16:43,457
Because I took a shower.
Good thing I did.
254
00:16:43,525 --> 00:16:46,119
- Check this out.
- What's this?
255
00:16:46,194 --> 00:16:49,789
An epiphany. The single
greatest idea I've ever had.
256
00:16:53,034 --> 00:16:54,695
What do you want?
257
00:16:54,769 --> 00:16:57,203
- Hi...
- Order something.
258
00:16:57,272 --> 00:17:00,207
Oh. Could I have a burger...
charbroiled...
259
00:17:00,275 --> 00:17:02,675
with an order
of fries and a coke?
260
00:17:08,083 --> 00:17:10,847
- What are you looking at?
- Nothing.
261
00:17:10,919 --> 00:17:13,149
Can I get a coffee? Black.
262
00:17:13,221 --> 00:17:14,711
I'm buying. Order something.
263
00:17:16,958 --> 00:17:18,289
Nah.
264
00:17:21,463 --> 00:17:23,090
What?
265
00:17:23,165 --> 00:17:24,792
- What's wrong?
- You are invited.
266
00:17:24,866 --> 00:17:26,766
Come to my poop party"?
267
00:17:26,835 --> 00:17:28,826
You'll let people
take a dump on you?
268
00:17:28,904 --> 00:17:31,099
- What?
- You're sick.
269
00:17:31,173 --> 00:17:33,334
I thought I knew you, man.
270
00:17:33,408 --> 00:17:35,808
No. That's where
I got the idea from.
271
00:17:35,877 --> 00:17:39,176
- Nobody's gonna crap in your face?
- Of course not, you idiot.
272
00:17:39,247 --> 00:17:42,444
I changed my mind. Give me the same
as him, with two free refills.
273
00:17:42,517 --> 00:17:44,109
- Too late.
- Quit screwing around and listen.
274
00:17:44,186 --> 00:17:47,553
Picture this.
It's the night before your wedding,
275
00:17:47,622 --> 00:17:50,887
and your friends have gotten together
to throw you a bachelor party.
276
00:17:50,959 --> 00:17:53,359
You expect some booze
and bawdy behavior,
277
00:17:53,428 --> 00:17:56,056
and of course,
the requisite buxom babe. Standard.
278
00:17:56,131 --> 00:17:58,656
This guy will eat
your boogers free, for nothing.
279
00:17:58,733 --> 00:18:02,863
That's where I come in.
The groom-to-be is expecting a bimbo
280
00:18:02,938 --> 00:18:05,566
with tits from here till Tuesday
and a gyrating lap dance.
281
00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:10,134
Instead, it's a male clown with
fishnets and garters and a bustier,
282
00:18:19,421 --> 00:18:22,720
Did you eat crack for breakfast?
What's the matter with you?
283
00:18:22,791 --> 00:18:25,225
It's a joke. Get it?
284
00:18:25,293 --> 00:18:28,023
Instead of the stripper,
I show up to the party
285
00:18:28,096 --> 00:18:29,723
and shock the shit out
of the groom!
286
00:18:29,798 --> 00:18:31,993
You're confident
there's a calling for that?
287
00:18:32,067 --> 00:18:34,661
No one will be ripping
my door off the hinges at first,
288
00:18:34,736 --> 00:18:37,102
but word of mouth advertising.
289
00:18:37,172 --> 00:18:39,572
I could develop
a cult following.
290
00:18:39,641 --> 00:18:42,576
Admit, you've never heard
anything like this before.
291
00:18:42,644 --> 00:18:45,704
- You got me there.
- Everyone except the groom-to-be
292
00:18:45,780 --> 00:18:47,042
is in on the joke.
293
00:18:47,115 --> 00:18:49,709
I show up 20 minutes
before the real entertainment,
294
00:18:49,784 --> 00:18:53,015
put on a show, then take off.
It'll be funny!
295
00:18:53,088 --> 00:18:54,612
Will you still use
the name Flappy?
296
00:18:54,689 --> 00:18:57,624
- 'Cause that will cause confusion.
- What do you think?
297
00:18:57,692 --> 00:18:59,922
What's your stage name?
You need a moniker.
298
00:18:59,995 --> 00:19:02,190
You can help me out with that.
299
00:19:04,299 --> 00:19:08,827
I know. How about " Will,
the naked and retarded clown"?
300
00:19:08,903 --> 00:19:12,066
I won't be naked.
Think of something else.
301
00:19:12,140 --> 00:19:15,166
Call a spade a spade.
What you're proposing is vulgar.
302
00:19:17,312 --> 00:19:18,802
Vulgar.
303
00:19:20,548 --> 00:19:23,016
It has sort of
a nice ring to it.
304
00:19:24,686 --> 00:19:28,019
- That might work, actually.
- Work it.
305
00:20:07,762 --> 00:20:09,957
37.
306
00:20:10,031 --> 00:20:13,364
Well, here goes something.
307
00:20:24,045 --> 00:20:25,808
Hello, boys!
308
00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:27,745
Guess who!
309
00:20:33,955 --> 00:20:36,480
Oh. I'm sorry.
310
00:20:36,558 --> 00:20:39,584
- I must have the wrong place.
- Not if you're ready to get down.
311
00:20:41,229 --> 00:20:44,198
- Looks like you are.
- I got him!
312
00:20:46,234 --> 00:20:49,067
You and my dad,
you're going to do the dog.
313
00:20:49,137 --> 00:20:51,867
Frankie, back off!
He don't need to know that just yet.
314
00:20:51,940 --> 00:20:53,737
You don't come near him
until I give the say so.
315
00:20:53,808 --> 00:20:56,538
This is my goddamn party!
I run the show.
316
00:20:56,611 --> 00:20:58,442
Get your pajamas on.
317
00:21:00,715 --> 00:21:04,173
I didn't get to do anything!
318
00:21:04,252 --> 00:21:06,345
You promised he'd be pretty.
319
00:21:06,421 --> 00:21:09,857
- He's fucking ugly.
- Close the lips, monkey balls!
320
00:21:09,924 --> 00:21:11,824
- He's Daddy's treat!
- Shut up, Frankie!
321
00:21:11,893 --> 00:21:14,487
- You're trying to kiss up...
- You're jealous, Gino,
322
00:21:14,562 --> 00:21:16,894
because Daddy let me hit the clown.
He likes me better!
323
00:21:16,965 --> 00:21:20,401
He doesn't like you better.
324
00:21:20,468 --> 00:21:23,733
Where do you think you're going?
This party ain't over.
325
00:21:23,805 --> 00:21:26,933
There's a shitload of fun to be had
before you call this a night.
326
00:21:28,009 --> 00:21:29,601
Help me.
327
00:21:29,677 --> 00:21:32,976
Get that, Gino.
This ain't no spectator sport.
328
00:21:43,525 --> 00:21:45,755
- I can do that.
- Well, do it.
329
00:21:49,197 --> 00:21:51,722
Gino, show your brother
a couple of steps over there.
330
00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:55,201
That boy has two left feet.
331
00:21:56,271 --> 00:21:58,171
Stop that kind of dancing.
332
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:16,313
- Why do you get to be the clown?
- Because I'm older.
333
00:22:16,391 --> 00:22:19,019
And I don't want
any more lip from you.
334
00:22:19,093 --> 00:22:24,156
- What is going on over there?
- He won't let me be the clown.
335
00:22:24,232 --> 00:22:28,134
I'm older.
I'm pretending I'm the clown.
336
00:22:28,203 --> 00:22:31,172
Frankie's Daddy's little boy.
That's all.
337
00:22:31,239 --> 00:22:34,333
Frankie, listen to your brother.
He is the boss.
338
00:22:34,409 --> 00:22:35,842
No!
339
00:22:37,545 --> 00:22:41,003
What the fuck are you saying?
Shut the fuck up!
340
00:22:41,082 --> 00:22:44,108
- I'll beat your ass!
- If you motherfuckers can't get along,
341
00:22:44,185 --> 00:22:46,085
I am never bringing you
with me ever again.
342
00:22:46,154 --> 00:22:47,951
Is that what you want?
343
00:22:48,022 --> 00:22:49,649
- No.
- No.
344
00:22:49,724 --> 00:22:52,056
You know it's sweet.
345
00:22:52,126 --> 00:22:55,254
Do you want to miss out
on your chance to...
346
00:22:55,330 --> 00:22:57,389
Shut your mouths!
347
00:22:58,633 --> 00:23:01,158
I want you to watch him.
Can you do that?
348
00:23:01,236 --> 00:23:03,966
- I can.
- Dad, he's getting away.
349
00:23:04,038 --> 00:23:08,134
- Will somebody stop him?
- I could have stopped him.
350
00:23:18,253 --> 00:23:20,721
Save some for us.
351
00:23:20,788 --> 00:23:23,222
Where did you put my dust pipe?
352
00:23:23,291 --> 00:23:26,590
- In the shitbag.
- Oh, the shitbag.
353
00:23:26,661 --> 00:23:29,152
I almost forgot
about the shitbag.
354
00:23:29,230 --> 00:23:32,427
Gino... get the camera.
355
00:23:32,500 --> 00:23:34,491
I want to make a record of this.
356
00:23:34,569 --> 00:23:37,697
If I'm not mistaken,
Mr. Fuckface here is...
357
00:23:37,772 --> 00:23:39,034
cherry.
358
00:23:42,744 --> 00:23:47,408
Daddy,
you want it on SP, LP or SLP?
359
00:23:47,482 --> 00:23:49,575
I don't give a fat rat's ass,
stupid bastard.
360
00:23:49,651 --> 00:23:51,846
- Just turn it on.
- It is on.
361
00:23:53,154 --> 00:23:56,146
Shut the fuck up.
I'm gonna start the show.
362
00:23:56,224 --> 00:24:00,183
What's your name?
I asked you a question, sweet ass.
363
00:24:02,297 --> 00:24:03,730
Vulgar.
364
00:24:03,798 --> 00:24:07,529
- Vulgar the Clown.
- Suck my daddy, swine fuck!
365
00:24:08,603 --> 00:24:11,265
Daddy! He's ruining everything!
366
00:24:11,339 --> 00:24:14,536
Shut the fuck up, Gino!
You fucking pussy!
367
00:24:14,609 --> 00:24:16,577
Get your sphincter
out of my frame, asshole!
368
00:24:16,644 --> 00:24:18,475
Cut it out!
369
00:24:18,546 --> 00:24:21,106
I mean, your real name,
funny man!
370
00:24:21,182 --> 00:24:24,674
Stop laughing.
Set him back up, you cocks.
371
00:24:24,752 --> 00:24:27,186
We'll just take that part out.
372
00:24:27,255 --> 00:24:29,416
All right, asshole.
Same question.
373
00:24:29,490 --> 00:24:32,789
- What the fuck is your name?
- William.
374
00:24:32,860 --> 00:24:35,090
- Why are you doing this?
- Okay, William.
375
00:24:35,163 --> 00:24:36,152
Willy. Willy Billy.
376
00:24:36,230 --> 00:24:39,961
- What is it that you do?
- I'm a party clown for kids.
377
00:24:40,034 --> 00:24:41,934
No, you're not.
You're a cocksucker!
378
00:24:42,003 --> 00:24:43,527
You want me blowing it
down your throat.
379
00:24:43,605 --> 00:24:46,267
- No.
- Liar. I know faggots like you.
380
00:24:46,341 --> 00:24:49,868
Nothing like the feeling of some
fucker's shaft down your throat?
381
00:24:49,944 --> 00:24:51,809
Could be some basehead.
What do you care?
382
00:24:51,879 --> 00:24:53,744
Probably suck down
his infected manstuff,
383
00:24:53,815 --> 00:24:55,783
smile and call it cherry pie.
384
00:24:55,850 --> 00:24:58,011
You get off on that shit,
don't you?
385
00:24:58,086 --> 00:25:01,112
- No...
- Yes, you do!
386
00:25:09,063 --> 00:25:10,963
Come on, let me go.
387
00:25:11,032 --> 00:25:12,556
I don't even know who you are.
388
00:25:12,634 --> 00:25:17,367
- My daddy's name is Edwina.
- Shut your hole, you moron!
389
00:25:17,438 --> 00:25:19,531
You always do that.
390
00:25:19,607 --> 00:25:22,167
I won't try to press charges.
391
00:25:22,243 --> 00:25:24,768
You're goddamn right you won't.
392
00:25:24,846 --> 00:25:27,781
He's afraid of Dad.
Look at him.
393
00:25:27,849 --> 00:25:30,215
He should be afraid of Dad.
Dad's tough.
394
00:25:30,284 --> 00:25:33,048
- Let me fuck his cock pouch.
- Not yet.
395
00:25:33,121 --> 00:25:35,555
- Now!
- Soon, though.
396
00:25:35,623 --> 00:25:36,851
Soon you'll taste what's good.
397
00:25:36,924 --> 00:25:39,415
But first,
I want him to say the words.
398
00:25:39,494 --> 00:25:43,191
Say, "I love to suck cock. "
399
00:25:45,099 --> 00:25:47,033
All right. All right.
400
00:25:47,101 --> 00:25:50,161
I love to suck cock.
401
00:25:50,238 --> 00:25:55,073
"My name is William,
and I love to suck cock. "
402
00:25:55,143 --> 00:25:57,611
My name is William,
403
00:25:57,679 --> 00:25:59,738
and I love to suck cock.
404
00:25:59,814 --> 00:26:02,749
- Tonight's the night.
- Please, stop.
405
00:26:02,817 --> 00:26:05,513
What we have here
is a failure to communicate.
406
00:26:05,586 --> 00:26:09,078
- Some men you just can't reach.
- Please, Edwina.
407
00:26:10,158 --> 00:26:11,648
Turn that thing off!
408
00:26:11,726 --> 00:26:13,819
What the fuck
did you say to me?
409
00:26:13,895 --> 00:26:17,387
- Tonight's the night.
- Before that.
410
00:26:17,465 --> 00:26:19,797
- You said my name.
- I'm sorry.
411
00:26:19,867 --> 00:26:23,462
- I didn't know.
- All right. Ass on the bed. Now!
412
00:26:23,538 --> 00:26:25,369
If I have to tell you again,
413
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:28,841
the wind will be whistling Dixie
through a hole in your face.
414
00:26:28,910 --> 00:26:31,276
Me and you are going to bed.
That's a fact!
415
00:26:31,345 --> 00:26:34,508
I'm going to make hate to you!
Get your ass up there!
416
00:26:43,291 --> 00:26:46,158
What do you think?
We're going to kiss?
417
00:26:46,227 --> 00:26:48,092
Get him on his fucking stomach!
418
00:26:48,162 --> 00:26:50,426
Quit holding me up, Gino.
Come on.
419
00:26:51,432 --> 00:26:53,024
Get away from me.
420
00:26:53,101 --> 00:26:54,591
No!
421
00:26:56,104 --> 00:26:58,800
- Time for the dog, Pop.
- Don't rush me.
422
00:26:58,873 --> 00:27:01,967
- Daddy's going to cock him hard.
- Damn right, I am!
423
00:27:02,043 --> 00:27:05,376
And you boys
will toss the salad!
424
00:27:05,446 --> 00:27:08,313
- You never had it so good, did you?
- He never did.
425
00:27:08,382 --> 00:27:09,974
Rim job!
426
00:27:11,152 --> 00:27:14,121
Now, the shame.
427
00:27:14,188 --> 00:27:16,452
Daddy's making his move!
428
00:27:33,841 --> 00:27:35,468
You know what you are, William?
429
00:27:35,543 --> 00:27:37,238
A whole lot of nothing.
430
00:27:40,481 --> 00:27:43,644
Do you know?
Who got the shitbag?
431
00:27:43,718 --> 00:27:46,186
You're holding it, Dad.
432
00:27:51,292 --> 00:27:53,283
He was good.
433
00:30:34,288 --> 00:30:35,915
You...
434
00:30:35,990 --> 00:30:38,481
you fucking nobody!
435
00:32:30,604 --> 00:32:33,129
Open up, Will.
436
00:32:33,207 --> 00:32:36,074
When was last time
you cleaned this place?
437
00:32:37,144 --> 00:32:38,941
What are you doing?
438
00:32:39,013 --> 00:32:41,709
Shit, what happened?
439
00:32:41,782 --> 00:32:43,773
Who did this?
440
00:32:43,851 --> 00:32:47,218
Did somebody rob you?
One of those fucks outside?
441
00:32:47,288 --> 00:32:50,621
You sit there, all right?
You'll be fine.
442
00:32:50,691 --> 00:32:53,251
- I'll call the cops.
- No!
443
00:32:53,327 --> 00:32:55,625
Don't call anyone.
444
00:32:56,697 --> 00:32:59,791
- You couldn't, even if I let you.
- Why?
445
00:33:02,570 --> 00:33:06,062
Will, tell me
what happened to you.
446
00:33:06,140 --> 00:33:07,835
I'll tell you.
447
00:33:07,908 --> 00:33:11,071
I'll tell you. Just...
448
00:33:11,145 --> 00:33:13,909
don't say a word, 'cause
once I tell you, that's it,
449
00:33:13,981 --> 00:33:16,415
it's never mentioned again.
450
00:33:16,484 --> 00:33:19,612
- I don't think...
- I don't care about what you think
451
00:33:19,687 --> 00:33:21,780
at this precise moment.
452
00:33:23,791 --> 00:33:25,622
What I'm about to tell you...
453
00:33:25,693 --> 00:33:27,786
is not to leave this room.
454
00:33:27,862 --> 00:33:30,456
It can't and it won't.
455
00:33:31,532 --> 00:33:33,591
I'll deal with it
in my own way.
456
00:33:33,667 --> 00:33:37,159
So, please, no questions or
suggestions about what I should do.
457
00:33:37,238 --> 00:33:39,729
As far as anyone else
is concerned,
458
00:33:39,807 --> 00:33:41,536
I was down by Gravely Point,
459
00:33:41,609 --> 00:33:44,237
and got jumped by some guy
with a limp and a. 44
460
00:33:44,311 --> 00:33:47,041
who pistol-whipped my ass
and took my wallet.
461
00:33:47,114 --> 00:33:48,445
All right?
462
00:33:49,884 --> 00:33:52,045
What choice do I have?
463
00:33:53,220 --> 00:33:54,551
This is what happened.
464
00:33:54,622 --> 00:33:57,523
- I must have the wrong place.
- Not if you're ready to get down.
465
00:33:59,393 --> 00:34:01,520
Now, the shame.
466
00:34:01,829 --> 00:34:05,560
What happened after that,
I don't remember so hot.
467
00:34:05,633 --> 00:34:08,932
All I know is that I woke up
this morning alive,
468
00:34:09,003 --> 00:34:12,632
and I'm still trying to decide
whether I should be thankful for that.
469
00:34:12,706 --> 00:34:15,368
I don't believe this.
470
00:34:15,442 --> 00:34:17,239
What did the doctor say?
471
00:34:18,546 --> 00:34:21,106
You didn't go to the hospital?
472
00:34:21,182 --> 00:34:24,640
- I just wanted to be home.
- Somebody has to look at you.
473
00:34:24,718 --> 00:34:26,618
No questions, no suggestions.
474
00:34:26,687 --> 00:34:29,554
One of those scumbags
could have given you a disease.
475
00:34:29,623 --> 00:34:32,592
- You agreed!
- I know what I said!
476
00:34:32,660 --> 00:34:35,458
But we have to find these guys.
They're sick!
477
00:34:35,529 --> 00:34:38,464
- You could have AIDS!
- You think I haven't thought of that?
478
00:34:38,532 --> 00:34:41,057
You don't think
that was my first thought?
479
00:34:41,135 --> 00:34:43,831
Fucking A, right, it was!
But you know what?
480
00:34:43,904 --> 00:34:47,601
If one of them did have it,
there's nothing I can do.
481
00:34:47,675 --> 00:34:50,439
- Will...
- Will you shut the fuck up?!
482
00:34:50,511 --> 00:34:52,979
You're leaving them out there
to do it to somebody else!
483
00:34:53,047 --> 00:34:55,413
- Not my problem.
- It is your problem!
484
00:34:55,482 --> 00:34:57,916
Cops can track dogshit
like these guys down.
485
00:34:57,985 --> 00:35:00,510
- You can help.
- How would that look?
486
00:35:00,588 --> 00:35:03,751
- How would what look?
- A man dressed as a perverted clown,
487
00:35:03,824 --> 00:35:06,520
shows up to a party
for three men and cries foul
488
00:35:06,594 --> 00:35:08,926
- after being roughed up a bit?
- A bit?!
489
00:35:08,996 --> 00:35:12,898
- There's more to it than that.
- Do you want to know why?
490
00:35:12,967 --> 00:35:15,197
Because that's what
a lawyer would do.
491
00:35:15,269 --> 00:35:17,362
And I won't sit in front
of a jury who thinks
492
00:35:17,438 --> 00:35:20,339
I'm some degenerate
defending my character.
493
00:35:20,407 --> 00:35:24,503
- You're not honest with yourself.
- Will you stop reacting,
494
00:35:24,578 --> 00:35:28,776
and think about it?!
They held me down and raped me!
495
00:35:28,849 --> 00:35:31,750
Exactly! That's why you shouldn't
let them walk!
496
00:35:31,819 --> 00:35:35,585
- You should...
- Syd, I don't want anyone to know!
497
00:35:35,656 --> 00:35:37,590
That's why.
498
00:35:39,093 --> 00:35:41,459
I don't want anyone to know.
499
00:35:41,528 --> 00:35:44,622
I just don't want anyone to know.
500
00:35:44,698 --> 00:35:48,190
- I don't want anyone to know!
- All right. It's okay.
501
00:35:48,269 --> 00:35:49,600
No one else, right?
502
00:35:49,670 --> 00:35:53,898
Nobody else.
503
00:37:08,015 --> 00:37:11,178
Mrs. Affleck?
This is Will Carlson,
504
00:37:11,251 --> 00:37:14,084
the party clown.
I know it's short notice,
505
00:37:14,154 --> 00:37:15,917
I won't be able to make it.
506
00:37:15,989 --> 00:37:18,184
I'm sorry, something came up.
507
00:37:18,258 --> 00:37:21,694
No, I can't. I can't.
508
00:37:24,998 --> 00:37:28,024
Yes, this is really Flappy.
509
00:37:28,102 --> 00:37:30,468
No, it really is.
510
00:37:30,537 --> 00:37:32,004
L...
511
00:37:32,072 --> 00:37:33,801
I'll be there, Benny.
512
00:37:33,874 --> 00:37:35,899
See you soon.
513
00:37:48,555 --> 00:37:50,580
Hold up!
514
00:37:52,559 --> 00:37:56,222
Watch where you're going, fuckstick!
515
00:37:56,296 --> 00:37:57,957
Sorry!
516
00:37:58,031 --> 00:37:59,555
- Hurry up!
- What's going on?
517
00:37:59,633 --> 00:38:02,261
Some dickhead got
his walking papers.
518
00:38:02,336 --> 00:38:05,066
That thing friggin' rules!
Let's go!
519
00:38:05,139 --> 00:38:07,505
- Walking papers?
- Divorce papers, dumbass!
520
00:38:09,443 --> 00:38:11,741
Where do you think
you're going?
521
00:38:11,812 --> 00:38:14,576
I'll have that shitbox
towed right out of here!
522
00:38:18,886 --> 00:38:21,286
Don't you people
have jobs? Let's go.
523
00:38:21,355 --> 00:38:22,913
Move it back. Let's go.
524
00:38:22,990 --> 00:38:25,117
I repeat, put the weapon down.
525
00:38:25,192 --> 00:38:26,887
Let Ashley go, Travis.
526
00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:29,793
I repeat, go fuck yourself!
527
00:38:29,863 --> 00:38:31,922
She's in charge here, not me!
528
00:38:31,999 --> 00:38:34,968
Not you, her!
Jill started all this shit!
529
00:38:35,035 --> 00:38:37,026
Ashley knows it too!
530
00:38:37,104 --> 00:38:38,594
You hear that?! She knows!
531
00:38:40,140 --> 00:38:43,200
You think you can sneak around
on me and get a divorce?
532
00:38:43,277 --> 00:38:46,678
I want what's rightfully mine!
I want what's coming to me.
533
00:38:46,747 --> 00:38:49,011
I know you don't
want to hurt your daughter.
534
00:38:49,082 --> 00:38:52,176
We both know that.
This is about something else.
535
00:38:52,252 --> 00:38:55,278
Just talk to me.
Maybe we can figure something out.
536
00:38:55,355 --> 00:38:58,085
- It'd be better...
- I'll tell you what'd be better.
537
00:38:58,158 --> 00:38:59,785
Send that bitch in here!
538
00:38:59,860 --> 00:39:02,055
She comes in, Ashley comes out.
539
00:39:02,129 --> 00:39:04,461
Get your damn hands off me!
I have to go!
540
00:39:04,531 --> 00:39:07,898
If your mother would listen,
we wouldn't have to go through this.
541
00:39:13,106 --> 00:39:14,630
You think I'm fucking with you?
542
00:39:14,708 --> 00:39:16,437
You're talking about
clearing this shit up,
543
00:39:16,510 --> 00:39:18,068
you've got cops skulking around!
544
00:39:18,145 --> 00:39:20,045
Don't jerk me off, Captain!
545
00:39:29,256 --> 00:39:31,247
It doesn't have to be this way.
546
00:39:31,325 --> 00:39:33,316
That's the way it's gotta be!
547
00:39:33,393 --> 00:39:35,691
If I go out,
I ain't going out alone!
548
00:39:35,762 --> 00:39:38,253
I'll take a few
of you fucks with me!
549
00:39:38,332 --> 00:39:41,995
No one's been hurt.
Walk away with a clean conscience.
550
00:39:42,069 --> 00:39:44,970
- It'll be better for us both.
- I'm better than you!
551
00:39:45,038 --> 00:39:47,563
- Better than all of you!
- Talk to me, Travis.
552
00:39:47,641 --> 00:39:49,734
I need to know
everything's okay in there.
553
00:39:49,810 --> 00:39:51,903
We're going to arrange
a meeting with your wife.
554
00:39:51,979 --> 00:39:53,674
Nobody else, just her!
555
00:39:53,747 --> 00:39:55,612
You know I can't promise that.
556
00:39:55,682 --> 00:39:58,207
You think
I'm some kind of asshole?!
557
00:39:58,285 --> 00:40:01,948
You think I don't know I'm fucked?
You're fucked too!
558
00:40:02,022 --> 00:40:03,250
No matter what you think,
559
00:40:03,323 --> 00:40:05,757
you're not walking away
from this a winner. No way!
560
00:40:05,826 --> 00:40:08,158
Is there anything you'd like?
561
00:40:08,228 --> 00:40:09,627
Some sandwiches, coffee maybe?
562
00:40:09,696 --> 00:40:11,823
- Something for Ashley?
- No!
563
00:40:11,899 --> 00:40:14,265
There's only one thing
on my mind.
564
00:40:14,334 --> 00:40:16,962
You have the power
to grant me one request?
565
00:40:17,037 --> 00:40:18,800
Within reason.
What do you want?
566
00:40:18,872 --> 00:40:21,397
Bitch's head on a stake.
567
00:40:36,557 --> 00:40:38,582
A deranged father.
568
00:40:38,659 --> 00:40:40,854
An innocent young girl.
569
00:40:40,928 --> 00:40:43,590
It could have ended up yet
another statistic
570
00:40:43,664 --> 00:40:47,225
in the growing holocaust
of violent domestic unrest
571
00:40:47,301 --> 00:40:49,667
that plagues this country.
572
00:40:49,736 --> 00:40:52,136
But a hometown hero
got involved.
573
00:40:52,205 --> 00:40:55,072
Or rather, a hometown clown.
574
00:40:55,142 --> 00:40:58,236
A clown who's got something
to smile about,
575
00:40:58,312 --> 00:41:01,611
one eternally grateful
little girl.
576
00:41:01,682 --> 00:41:04,480
Let's please welcome
Will Carlson,
577
00:41:04,551 --> 00:41:08,419
better known as Flappy the Clown.
Welcome to the show.
578
00:41:20,267 --> 00:41:21,427
Will...
579
00:41:21,501 --> 00:41:23,628
what I'd like you to do now
580
00:41:23,704 --> 00:41:25,672
is to take us back.
581
00:41:25,739 --> 00:41:28,003
Tell me what was going
through your mind,
582
00:41:28,075 --> 00:41:30,669
what the catalyst,
one might say,
583
00:41:30,744 --> 00:41:34,874
was that led you
to confront this maniac?
584
00:41:34,948 --> 00:41:38,884
I've given this some thought
over the past few days.
585
00:41:38,952 --> 00:41:40,977
To be totally honest,
586
00:41:41,054 --> 00:41:43,147
I still don't know.
587
00:41:43,223 --> 00:41:45,623
There was a little girl
that you saved.
588
00:41:45,692 --> 00:41:48,160
- A little eight-year-old girl.
- Yeah.
589
00:41:48,228 --> 00:41:50,321
Then the fact
that it was a child,
590
00:41:50,397 --> 00:41:52,729
perhaps, that moved you
in some way?
591
00:41:52,799 --> 00:41:56,860
Call me old-fashioned,
but I've always had a soft spot
592
00:41:56,937 --> 00:41:59,167
for kids with guns
pointed at their heads.
593
00:42:00,841 --> 00:42:02,536
But seriously,
594
00:42:02,609 --> 00:42:04,907
you could have easily
have been killed.
595
00:42:04,978 --> 00:42:08,880
I can't tell you how many times
I've been told that,
596
00:42:08,949 --> 00:42:12,248
- but here I am.
- And here you are.
597
00:42:12,319 --> 00:42:14,583
Let's take a few questions
from the audience.
598
00:42:14,655 --> 00:42:16,282
Yes, ma'am.
599
00:42:17,357 --> 00:42:19,291
Hi, Flappy.
600
00:42:19,359 --> 00:42:21,156
Hi.
601
00:42:21,228 --> 00:42:25,028
I'm glad you killed that
worthless piece of trash.
602
00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:28,934
I didn't kill him.
603
00:42:29,002 --> 00:42:32,494
- I didn't kill him.
- You're no hero.
604
00:42:32,572 --> 00:42:35,234
Now, is there a ceiling
on how much crap
605
00:42:35,308 --> 00:42:38,038
we, as Americans, have to tolerate
from like this?
606
00:42:39,546 --> 00:42:41,912
Also, I was wondering
607
00:42:41,982 --> 00:42:45,679
if you'd consider doing
another kind of party?
608
00:42:45,752 --> 00:42:49,745
Umm... I didn't quite catch
the first part of that question.
609
00:42:49,823 --> 00:42:52,883
And as for the latter...
I didn't get that either.
610
00:42:52,959 --> 00:42:55,393
I still do parties for kids!
611
00:42:59,866 --> 00:43:02,334
Only humans
can he heroes, right?
612
00:43:02,402 --> 00:43:04,893
Tell that
to Walt Flannigan's dog,
613
00:43:04,971 --> 00:43:07,599
a gutsy pooch who pulled
his screaming master
614
00:43:07,674 --> 00:43:09,574
from a burning
comic book store.
615
00:43:09,643 --> 00:43:12,441
That story and
other hometown heroes...
616
00:43:18,485 --> 00:43:19,679
Don't.
617
00:43:27,227 --> 00:43:28,319
Flappy.
618
00:43:29,696 --> 00:43:33,427
- May I suggest a sandwich, sir?
- You may suggest nothing.
619
00:43:33,500 --> 00:43:36,230
Please... he's a fucking party clown.
There's not too many of them.
620
00:43:36,303 --> 00:43:38,237
Now find him and get back to me.
621
00:43:38,305 --> 00:43:41,069
Jesus H. Christ, are you still
out here from last week?
622
00:43:41,141 --> 00:43:43,769
- Well, if it isn't Mr. Funny Pants.
- It's not his fault.
623
00:43:43,844 --> 00:43:45,607
There's been a horrible
wind shear all morning.
624
00:43:45,679 --> 00:43:47,670
Relax.
625
00:43:47,748 --> 00:43:49,739
Where have you been?
You're an hour late.
626
00:43:49,816 --> 00:43:51,545
Somebody's got
to secure our positions
627
00:43:51,618 --> 00:43:53,586
at the top of
the entertainment biz.
628
00:43:53,653 --> 00:43:54,585
Damn.
629
00:43:54,654 --> 00:43:56,622
You're not even fucking listening.
630
00:43:57,958 --> 00:43:59,425
All right, Marty,
what's on your mind?
631
00:43:59,493 --> 00:44:02,985
Well, Gil, how would you like
to be responsible for programming
632
00:44:03,063 --> 00:44:06,089
one of the most popular
kiddie shows of all time?
633
00:44:06,166 --> 00:44:07,565
Well, Marty, I'd love it.
634
00:44:07,634 --> 00:44:09,499
Kind of missed
my window, though.
635
00:44:09,569 --> 00:44:12,003
Sesame Street's been on
for quite some time.
636
00:44:12,072 --> 00:44:15,701
I'm talking about now,
about a new show.
637
00:44:15,776 --> 00:44:16,765
Gil?
638
00:44:17,944 --> 00:44:19,673
I'm talking about Flappy.
639
00:44:19,746 --> 00:44:21,373
- Who?
- He said Flappy.
640
00:44:21,448 --> 00:44:24,417
I know what he said.
Stand over there, please.
641
00:44:24,484 --> 00:44:27,044
You've got to tell me
what you're talking about
642
00:44:27,120 --> 00:44:30,988
- before I can give you an appraisal.
- First off, it's not a what.
643
00:44:31,057 --> 00:44:34,857
It's a who. And he's making
a big splash, Orca-style.
644
00:44:34,928 --> 00:44:37,795
It's the hero clown.
The one who saved the little girl.
645
00:44:37,864 --> 00:44:40,355
- The father and guns and everything.
- Boring.
646
00:44:40,433 --> 00:44:42,401
He's become a media darling.
647
00:44:42,469 --> 00:44:44,596
It's already transcended
the local networks.
648
00:44:44,671 --> 00:44:47,265
This guy has been on
two nationwide tabloid shows.
649
00:44:47,340 --> 00:44:49,308
And he's scheduled
for prime time tonight.
650
00:44:49,376 --> 00:44:52,311
And what did you say
his name is again?
651
00:44:52,379 --> 00:44:54,176
Flappy.
652
00:44:54,247 --> 00:44:56,181
How can you not love that?
653
00:44:56,249 --> 00:44:57,944
Not loving it.
654
00:44:58,018 --> 00:44:59,178
Fine.
655
00:44:59,252 --> 00:45:01,914
It's all right.
Just work on your...
656
00:45:01,988 --> 00:45:05,219
let me tell you about this one time
I brought this other kid's show
657
00:45:05,292 --> 00:45:07,157
- to Gil's attention.
- Hey! Hey!
658
00:45:07,227 --> 00:45:09,559
We agreed never
to bring that up again.
659
00:45:09,629 --> 00:45:11,324
Not even in jest.
660
00:45:11,398 --> 00:45:13,958
Nobody knew
that big, fat purple bastard
661
00:45:14,034 --> 00:45:15,899
would have such staying power.
662
00:45:15,969 --> 00:45:17,800
Who is this Flappy guy?
663
00:45:17,871 --> 00:45:21,500
People save kids
every day of the week.
664
00:45:21,575 --> 00:45:23,634
I heard some flea-footed dog
saved his master.
665
00:45:23,710 --> 00:45:27,373
- You want to give him a TV show too?
- People love him.
666
00:45:27,447 --> 00:45:29,244
If you're a parent and you haven't
secured him
667
00:45:29,316 --> 00:45:31,250
for your kids' party, forget it.
668
00:45:31,318 --> 00:45:33,411
You're meat. They hate you.
669
00:45:33,486 --> 00:45:36,387
This guy's gonna be big!
I can feel it.
670
00:45:36,456 --> 00:45:38,583
That prehistoric
shitbag, dude, he's scrapnel.
671
00:45:38,658 --> 00:45:40,751
This Flappy
is prime fucking rib!
672
00:45:40,827 --> 00:45:44,092
- Strike while the iron's hot!
- All right. Listen.
673
00:45:44,164 --> 00:45:46,962
We've got two months
until our contracts are re-upped.
674
00:45:47,033 --> 00:45:49,399
- If he's still as hot then...
- Listen.
675
00:45:49,469 --> 00:45:53,030
- ♪ I love you, you love me... ♪
- All right!
676
00:45:53,106 --> 00:45:56,735
All right, you pushy bastard.
Get this Flappy guy on board.
677
00:45:56,810 --> 00:45:58,869
- Yes!
- No... and I repeat...
678
00:45:58,945 --> 00:46:01,880
no long-term deal,
standard contract only.
679
00:46:01,948 --> 00:46:04,644
I'm not marrying some
wet-behind-the-ears rookie.
680
00:46:04,718 --> 00:46:06,481
Gil?
681
00:46:06,553 --> 00:46:08,783
Flappy's the word.
682
00:46:08,855 --> 00:46:11,346
♪ Flappy's the word,
is the word ♪
683
00:46:11,424 --> 00:46:13,119
- ♪ Have you heard... ♪
- Marty, do you mind?
684
00:46:13,193 --> 00:46:14,125
It's cool.
685
00:46:18,331 --> 00:46:19,559
Flappy...
686
00:46:19,633 --> 00:46:21,430
you had better have me golfing
687
00:46:21,501 --> 00:46:24,061
with some players
in Hawaii by year's end.
688
00:46:25,272 --> 00:46:27,433
He will, sir. He will.
689
00:46:27,507 --> 00:46:30,340
- The wedge!
- Wise choice, sir.
690
00:46:45,525 --> 00:46:48,050
Look, I don't know
who you're collecting for,
691
00:46:48,128 --> 00:46:51,154
but they can save a cell for me
down in debtors prison.
692
00:46:51,231 --> 00:46:52,789
Oh. Mr. Carlson.
693
00:46:52,866 --> 00:46:55,357
Hi. No, I'm Martan Ingram.
694
00:46:55,435 --> 00:46:56,959
Jayram Television.
695
00:46:57,037 --> 00:46:58,937
You know, out at the highlands.
696
00:46:59,005 --> 00:47:01,872
- Oh. I'm sorry. Come in.
- Thank you.
697
00:47:01,942 --> 00:47:03,466
Come in.
698
00:47:05,011 --> 00:47:07,571
You know how
those bill collectors can be,
699
00:47:07,647 --> 00:47:10,741
wanting payment on goods
and services, the nerve.
700
00:47:10,817 --> 00:47:13,308
They can be trying. Ummm...
701
00:47:13,386 --> 00:47:15,877
let me cut right to the chase.
702
00:47:15,956 --> 00:47:18,186
Have you ever done
any television before?
703
00:47:18,258 --> 00:47:20,226
A ton in the past few weeks.
704
00:47:20,293 --> 00:47:23,490
Oh, the news, but I'm talking
about before that.
705
00:47:23,563 --> 00:47:26,555
Well, once I was eating
at Ray's Ribtip Grill,
706
00:47:26,633 --> 00:47:28,430
and this old dude
smashed through the window
707
00:47:28,501 --> 00:47:30,992
and killed this retarded kid,
and they asked me for a comment
708
00:47:31,071 --> 00:47:32,265
on the 11:00 news.
709
00:47:33,340 --> 00:47:34,671
Well... I...
710
00:47:37,410 --> 00:47:40,208
I meant, have you thought
of hosting your own show?
711
00:47:40,280 --> 00:47:44,148
Well, I was trying to set up
something on cable access,
712
00:47:44,217 --> 00:47:48,779
- but air time doesn't come cheap.
- It can be pricey.
713
00:47:48,855 --> 00:47:52,985
I was thinking that I...
we, at Jayram...
714
00:47:53,059 --> 00:47:56,495
we're extremely enthusiastic
about you hosting your own show.
715
00:47:56,563 --> 00:47:58,793
Yeah, right.
Where's the camera?
716
00:47:58,865 --> 00:48:00,890
Who are you,
Allen Funt's evil twin?
717
00:48:03,269 --> 00:48:06,067
- You're serious?
- As a heart attack.
718
00:48:07,374 --> 00:48:10,468
I always wanted to say that.
You'd be syndicated,
719
00:48:10,543 --> 00:48:12,909
which means that every kid,
from Portland, Oregon
720
00:48:12,979 --> 00:48:15,607
to Portland, Maine,
would be watching your show,
721
00:48:15,682 --> 00:48:17,877
or more specifically,
you, the Flappy.
722
00:48:19,352 --> 00:48:23,254
- I don't know what to think.
- I brought a contract along,
723
00:48:23,323 --> 00:48:27,259
and it's spelled out fairly clearly.
I was hoping we could...
724
00:48:28,495 --> 00:48:29,655
jeez...
725
00:48:29,729 --> 00:48:31,924
I'm rushing you, aren't I?
726
00:48:31,998 --> 00:48:34,831
God, I'm not even thinking
this is sudden for you.
727
00:48:36,069 --> 00:48:38,833
That's one way of putting it.
Surreal might be another.
728
00:48:38,905 --> 00:48:41,066
Why don't we do this
like real people?
729
00:48:41,141 --> 00:48:42,904
Do you want to have
dinner tonight?
730
00:48:42,976 --> 00:48:46,468
If you want, feel free
to bring your agent along.
731
00:48:46,546 --> 00:48:50,004
- That's fine with me.
- I don't exactly have an agent.
732
00:48:51,785 --> 00:48:54,777
Well... if we had to,
we could wait.
733
00:48:54,854 --> 00:48:57,448
No! I mean, no.
734
00:48:57,524 --> 00:48:59,992
Why give those guys 10%?
735
00:49:00,060 --> 00:49:03,723
It's just that my car
is a bit on the fritz.
736
00:49:03,797 --> 00:49:06,322
Not a problem. We'll send
a car to pick you up.
737
00:49:06,399 --> 00:49:09,732
- 7:00?
- That would be great.
738
00:49:09,803 --> 00:49:11,930
Ummm... why, though?
739
00:49:12,005 --> 00:49:14,337
If you're partial
to public transportation,
740
00:49:14,407 --> 00:49:18,468
- by all means, take the bus.
- No, no. Why the show?
741
00:49:18,545 --> 00:49:21,480
Why me?
I know I helped a little girl...
742
00:49:21,548 --> 00:49:23,106
Helped her?
743
00:49:23,183 --> 00:49:25,708
You saved her.
744
00:49:25,785 --> 00:49:28,049
People remember
things like that.
745
00:49:30,190 --> 00:49:31,953
Have you ever heard of karma?
746
00:49:32,025 --> 00:49:34,960
- Yeah.
- Okay, then.
747
00:49:42,068 --> 00:49:44,298
Hi, Mom.
748
00:49:44,370 --> 00:49:46,838
Visiting hours are over.
You have to leave.
749
00:49:46,906 --> 00:49:49,739
The secretary said
I could drop by.
750
00:49:49,809 --> 00:49:52,471
I'm sorry I haven't been by
in a few days. I've been busy.
751
00:49:52,545 --> 00:49:55,070
- I saw you on the television.
- You did?
752
00:49:55,148 --> 00:49:56,877
That's what I'm here
to talk about.
753
00:49:56,950 --> 00:49:59,680
Of course, I was watching it
in the community room.
754
00:49:59,752 --> 00:50:02,721
I don't have a TV of my own,
like everyone else here.
755
00:50:02,789 --> 00:50:05,690
You will soon.
I have some pretty good news.
756
00:50:05,758 --> 00:50:08,090
- Sure.
- No, I do.
757
00:50:08,161 --> 00:50:11,358
Someone from one of the networks
saw what I did.
758
00:50:11,431 --> 00:50:13,729
It was a very stupid thing to do.
759
00:50:13,800 --> 00:50:15,859
Some people think that.
760
00:50:15,935 --> 00:50:18,335
It might not have been
one of my smartest moves...
761
00:50:18,404 --> 00:50:20,497
I don't know that you've
ever made a smart move
762
00:50:20,573 --> 00:50:22,871
in your whole miserable existence.
763
00:50:22,942 --> 00:50:26,105
I'm sorry about what I said.
When you talk about him...
764
00:50:26,179 --> 00:50:29,706
I didn't mean it.
I got a little mad.
765
00:50:29,782 --> 00:50:33,013
Can we forget it happened
and start fresh?
766
00:50:33,086 --> 00:50:35,179
I don't have to stand for that.
767
00:50:35,255 --> 00:50:38,156
I know. I said I'm sorry.
I didn't come here to fight.
768
00:50:38,224 --> 00:50:41,057
I came to tell you
that I got a job.
769
00:50:41,127 --> 00:50:42,651
On television!
770
00:50:42,729 --> 00:50:44,754
Television?
771
00:50:44,831 --> 00:50:48,198
They must have put you
on as a maintenance man.
772
00:50:48,268 --> 00:50:49,997
You have no skills.
773
00:50:50,069 --> 00:50:52,196
What could you be qualified for?
774
00:50:52,272 --> 00:50:56,106
I'm a clown, just like
I've always wanted to be.
775
00:50:56,176 --> 00:50:57,871
It finally worked out.
776
00:50:57,944 --> 00:50:59,741
For a while, it looked bleak,
777
00:50:59,812 --> 00:51:02,280
and I thought I might have
to give it up, but I'm glad I didn't!
778
00:51:02,348 --> 00:51:05,317
Still with the clown business?
779
00:51:05,385 --> 00:51:07,285
You'll go nowhere with that.
780
00:51:07,353 --> 00:51:11,722
I've tried to drum some sense
into that skull of yours for years...
781
00:51:11,791 --> 00:51:13,918
Mom, you're not listening.
782
00:51:13,993 --> 00:51:17,053
I have my own show,
my own regular TV show.
783
00:51:17,130 --> 00:51:20,190
It will be called, Flappy's Fun House.
784
00:51:20,266 --> 00:51:22,200
That's an absurd name.
785
00:51:22,268 --> 00:51:25,431
They thought of the name.
But it'll be pretty good.
786
00:51:25,505 --> 00:51:28,133
It has some positive messages,
and no violence.
787
00:51:28,208 --> 00:51:31,507
The idea is that it teaches
and entertains at the same time.
788
00:51:31,578 --> 00:51:33,978
What parent in their right mind
789
00:51:34,047 --> 00:51:37,016
would let their child
watch such foolishness?
790
00:51:37,083 --> 00:51:39,381
It won't last.
Even I can see that.
791
00:51:39,452 --> 00:51:42,546
You'll end up right back
where you started.
792
00:51:42,622 --> 00:51:45,352
Seems you were born
to be a bumbling idiot.
793
00:51:46,526 --> 00:51:50,257
What is so hard
about being happy for me?
794
00:51:50,330 --> 00:51:54,323
Why can't you say anything nice?
795
00:51:54,400 --> 00:51:56,425
Why bother telling you?
796
00:51:56,502 --> 00:51:58,060
I'd just as soon
you didn't annoy me
797
00:51:58,137 --> 00:52:00,332
with such asinine fairy tales.
798
00:52:00,406 --> 00:52:03,637
- Television!
- Want me to show you the contracts?
799
00:52:03,710 --> 00:52:07,305
- What do you need? Written proof?
- Maven on the move.
800
00:52:07,380 --> 00:52:12,909
What you need to learn is what you do
is nothing more than a hobby.
801
00:52:12,986 --> 00:52:15,546
It's a job, not a hobby.
802
00:52:15,622 --> 00:52:19,080
Yes, well, you've overstayed
your welcome.
803
00:52:20,593 --> 00:52:22,493
Go on, get out!
804
00:52:22,562 --> 00:52:24,462
Bring some good news back
with you next time,
805
00:52:24,530 --> 00:52:26,930
not some bullshit
about having a real job!
806
00:52:27,000 --> 00:52:30,766
I'll believe you have a real job
the day you can walk in,
807
00:52:30,837 --> 00:52:33,362
and your hands aren't softer
than a newborn's ass.
808
00:52:33,439 --> 00:52:37,170
Out! I don't want to hear it.
You make me ill.
809
00:52:54,761 --> 00:52:57,594
Well, kids,
you won't believe this,
810
00:52:57,664 --> 00:53:00,690
but that's all the time
we have for today.
811
00:53:03,002 --> 00:53:05,869
Have no fear. We'll do it
all again tomorrow,
812
00:53:05,938 --> 00:53:09,465
with more fun and excitement
on Flappy's Fun House!
813
00:53:09,542 --> 00:53:11,407
Yeah!
814
00:53:12,478 --> 00:53:15,140
Now, I want to thank you,
815
00:53:15,214 --> 00:53:18,307
and you,
816
00:53:18,384 --> 00:53:22,218
for helping me make
this first show a big success.
817
00:53:22,288 --> 00:53:24,518
I want you
to do what Flappy did.
818
00:53:24,590 --> 00:53:27,354
Stay in school and
take care of yourself,
819
00:53:27,427 --> 00:53:31,659
because you know what?
You're the only you you've got.
820
00:53:31,731 --> 00:53:34,256
And I'm not clowning around!
821
00:53:38,705 --> 00:53:41,765
- Excuse me.
- You are a natural.
822
00:53:41,841 --> 00:53:44,867
- You realize that, don't you?
- Hello, Flappy. Martan
823
00:53:44,944 --> 00:53:47,708
Cinnamon, get the door.
These kids, they just...
824
00:53:47,780 --> 00:53:50,613
- they love you.
- They do, don't they?
825
00:53:50,683 --> 00:53:52,617
Absolutely.
I'm no psychic friend,
826
00:53:52,685 --> 00:53:55,950
but I'll bet that within a year,
you'll be more popular
827
00:53:56,022 --> 00:53:59,389
than "It's Scotty"
and those powerful Rangers.
828
00:53:59,459 --> 00:54:01,927
- Really?
- Yes.
829
00:54:05,498 --> 00:54:07,056
Fuck.
830
00:55:12,932 --> 00:55:14,729
It came, Mommy!
831
00:55:14,801 --> 00:55:17,361
- Flappy sent the video!
- So he did.
832
00:55:17,437 --> 00:55:19,769
- Want me to open it for you?
- "Want me to open it for you?"
833
00:55:19,839 --> 00:55:22,433
Would you two shut up?
I'm trying to watch a picture here.
834
00:55:22,508 --> 00:55:25,671
- Shut up, you old fool.
- Shut up, old fool.
835
00:55:25,745 --> 00:55:29,181
Hey, I don't want her
talking to me like that.
836
00:55:29,248 --> 00:55:32,183
- Can I watch it now?
- You certainly can.
837
00:55:32,251 --> 00:55:35,345
What? I was watching something.
838
00:55:35,421 --> 00:55:37,685
I noticed.
839
00:55:37,757 --> 00:55:39,691
It's just that I don't care.
840
00:55:41,160 --> 00:55:45,529
- What? I pay the damn rent!
- Watch your English around her.
841
00:55:45,598 --> 00:55:47,361
What does that say?
Volume eight?
842
00:55:47,433 --> 00:55:50,163
Have you been buying that crap
and not telling me?
843
00:55:51,938 --> 00:55:54,338
- What is it?
- It's Flappy's Funhouse!
844
00:55:54,407 --> 00:55:56,432
I can read. What's a Flappy?
845
00:55:56,509 --> 00:55:58,500
I like and love Flappy.
846
00:56:00,446 --> 00:56:02,710
- That tells me nothing...
- Leave her alone.
847
00:56:02,782 --> 00:56:06,115
Leave me alone. He's mad
'cause Flappy's better than him.
848
00:56:06,185 --> 00:56:08,949
All right, that's it.
I'm going out with my boys.
849
00:56:09,021 --> 00:56:10,750
We're bowling tonight.
850
00:56:10,823 --> 00:56:13,451
- League champs, I might add.
- Oh, I care.
851
00:56:13,526 --> 00:56:16,120
Do they have social lives?
852
00:56:16,195 --> 00:56:17,787
I have never seen two grown men
853
00:56:17,864 --> 00:56:20,492
who'd rather hang out
with their father constantly
854
00:56:20,566 --> 00:56:24,332
instead of going on dates, or
at least attempting to meet women.
855
00:56:24,403 --> 00:56:26,496
Oh yeah?
Maybe that's what we're doing.
856
00:56:26,572 --> 00:56:29,132
- Have you considered that?
- Who in their right mind
857
00:56:29,208 --> 00:56:30,698
would be interested in you?
858
00:56:30,776 --> 00:56:33,244
I can't believe I was
for that fleeting moment.
859
00:56:33,312 --> 00:56:35,746
You know,
that front door hasn't moved.
860
00:56:38,885 --> 00:56:41,513
Look at this. A clown.
861
00:56:41,587 --> 00:56:42,679
How unique.
862
00:56:42,755 --> 00:56:45,315
No one has ever thought
of putting a clown on TV before.
863
00:56:45,391 --> 00:56:48,656
You people are so easily taken,
864
00:56:48,728 --> 00:56:50,320
especially you.
865
00:57:13,019 --> 00:57:14,577
My name's William,
866
00:57:14,654 --> 00:57:18,317
and I love to suck cocks.
I love...
867
00:57:18,391 --> 00:57:20,325
to suck cock.
868
00:57:21,594 --> 00:57:22,891
For kids.
869
00:57:33,873 --> 00:57:36,967
Gee, Ed, if I had known
you were gonna develop
870
00:57:37,043 --> 00:57:38,271
such an affinity for it,
871
00:57:38,344 --> 00:57:41,006
I'd have signed you up
for his fan club.
872
00:57:45,818 --> 00:57:48,082
- Mom!
- What's the matter, jackass?!
873
00:57:48,154 --> 00:57:50,349
He sure is one.
874
00:58:01,834 --> 00:58:05,668
I was like, " 10 grand
for a store opening?"
875
00:58:05,738 --> 00:58:07,729
I felt like
I was robbing the guy.
876
00:58:07,807 --> 00:58:10,207
I half expected him
to ask me for help trafficking
877
00:58:10,276 --> 00:58:12,301
black market babies to Mexico.
878
00:58:12,378 --> 00:58:15,814
I'd do it for 10 grand.
Which way to the border?
879
00:58:15,881 --> 00:58:18,475
I'm getting another call.
880
00:58:18,551 --> 00:58:21,577
Don't forget we're having dinner
with Phil at Raskin's tonight.
881
00:58:21,654 --> 00:58:23,781
I'll give you a call
around 8:00.
882
00:58:23,856 --> 00:58:25,619
Talk to you then.
883
00:58:25,691 --> 00:58:27,124
Hello?
884
00:58:27,193 --> 00:58:29,957
Hello, fuckface!
885
00:58:30,029 --> 00:58:32,759
- Who is this?
- Say it isn't so.
886
00:58:32,832 --> 00:58:34,322
You've forgotten me already.
887
00:58:37,136 --> 00:58:39,570
And after we were so...
888
00:58:39,639 --> 00:58:41,266
familiar.
889
00:58:47,747 --> 00:58:51,080
- What the hell do you want?
- It's all coming back to you now?
890
00:58:51,117 --> 00:58:54,245
I thought it might.
What do I want?
891
00:58:54,320 --> 00:58:56,515
That's a good question.
892
00:58:56,589 --> 00:58:59,990
Immortality? Legendary status?
893
00:59:00,059 --> 00:59:03,085
Wait! I've got it! $50,000!
894
00:59:03,162 --> 00:59:07,599
For what?! Count yourself fortunate
your ass isn't in jail.
895
00:59:07,667 --> 00:59:10,397
I should have called the cops
on you, you sick fuck!
896
00:59:10,469 --> 00:59:12,801
Who the fuck do you think
you're talking to?
897
00:59:12,872 --> 00:59:16,137
I'll show them the goddamn tape.
I'll bury you!
898
00:59:16,208 --> 00:59:18,176
What tape?
899
00:59:18,244 --> 00:59:20,542
You put on a good performance
that night.
900
00:59:20,613 --> 00:59:22,581
You took off
the clown garments...
901
00:59:22,648 --> 00:59:24,377
did it all.
902
00:59:24,450 --> 00:59:27,283
The show was good.
Worth the money.
903
00:59:27,353 --> 00:59:29,981
I didn't put on any show.
You know it.
904
00:59:30,056 --> 00:59:32,581
What does your tape show?
What you did to me?
905
00:59:32,658 --> 00:59:35,525
Go ahead, shoot yourself
in the foot, by all means.
906
00:59:35,594 --> 00:59:37,619
You're trying to call my bluff.
907
00:59:37,697 --> 00:59:39,927
That's not all the tape
shows, handsome.
908
00:59:39,999 --> 00:59:41,830
It shows you getting down,
909
00:59:41,901 --> 00:59:44,961
but it seems you like talking
about what you do.
910
00:59:45,037 --> 00:59:47,699
- I don't believe you.
- That's fine.
911
00:59:47,773 --> 00:59:49,707
It's just that my boy Gino,
912
00:59:49,775 --> 00:59:52,972
if there's one thing he likes
it's fooling around with that camera,
913
00:59:53,045 --> 00:59:56,276
making little movies, editing...
914
00:59:57,349 --> 01:00:01,479
I knew it. Give me my video.
915
01:00:02,621 --> 01:00:05,488
Now listen. You'll want
to work with me on this.
916
01:00:05,558 --> 01:00:07,822
If I show that tape
to a few people...
917
01:00:07,893 --> 01:00:11,056
the right people or the wrong people,
depending on how you look at it...
918
01:00:11,130 --> 01:00:13,928
Flappy's in for a world of trouble,
wouldn't you say?
919
01:00:13,999 --> 01:00:17,162
What assurance do I have
that this tape even exists?
920
01:00:17,236 --> 01:00:20,034
- Once you get the money, then what?
- You get the tape.
921
01:00:20,106 --> 01:00:21,164
This is the only one?
922
01:00:21,240 --> 01:00:24,573
How can I be certain another one
won't mysteriously pop up?
923
01:00:24,643 --> 01:00:27,635
- You can't be.
- Then why would I agree?
924
01:00:27,713 --> 01:00:29,943
Because you have no choice,
Mr. Fuck-face!
925
01:00:30,015 --> 01:00:32,381
Stop calling me that!
926
01:00:34,186 --> 01:00:35,949
- When?
- Tomorrow.
927
01:00:36,021 --> 01:00:37,921
How about the corner phone
at Snub and Cornwall?
928
01:00:37,990 --> 01:00:41,187
- I suggest you be there and wait.
- I want to know now.
929
01:00:41,260 --> 01:00:43,785
I'd let you know right now,
but I have my eye...
930
01:00:43,863 --> 01:00:46,058
on the most delicious
young gentleman.
931
01:00:46,132 --> 01:00:50,296
Couldn't be more than seven.
So supple at that age, so...
932
01:00:50,369 --> 01:00:52,360
goodbye, fuck-face!
933
01:01:02,948 --> 01:01:04,415
What?
934
01:01:06,685 --> 01:01:08,710
When you told me
what happened that night,
935
01:01:08,788 --> 01:01:11,348
you didn't mention a video camera.
936
01:01:11,423 --> 01:01:14,722
Think hard.
Are you sure you don't remember?
937
01:01:14,794 --> 01:01:16,887
I'm sure.
938
01:01:16,962 --> 01:01:19,123
I could barely remember
anything the next day,
939
01:01:19,198 --> 01:01:21,132
let alone a year later.
940
01:01:23,269 --> 01:01:25,897
What are the chances he would
hold on to something like that?
941
01:01:25,971 --> 01:01:27,962
I think he's bullshitting you.
942
01:01:28,040 --> 01:01:31,601
That's the thing. I don't know.
943
01:01:31,677 --> 01:01:34,043
I'd like to believe he is...
944
01:01:35,114 --> 01:01:36,945
but I'm not sure.
945
01:01:38,184 --> 01:01:39,947
I don't think he is.
946
01:01:41,253 --> 01:01:43,414
What are you going to do?
947
01:01:43,489 --> 01:01:46,185
I'll pay him the money.
What do you think?
948
01:01:46,258 --> 01:01:48,249
- Why?
- Why?
949
01:01:48,327 --> 01:01:51,819
Take a look around you.
I worked hard to get where I am,
950
01:01:51,897 --> 01:01:53,489
and I won't let
some puissant take it away.
951
01:01:53,566 --> 01:01:57,434
- $50,000 is a lot of money.
- It's a gamble.
952
01:01:57,503 --> 01:01:59,767
I just hope
this is it after this.
953
01:01:59,839 --> 01:02:03,138
Then we can threaten him
with extortion after paying him.
954
01:02:03,209 --> 01:02:06,838
That's insane! Why should we give him
anything after what he did?!
955
01:02:06,912 --> 01:02:09,437
- "We" aren't giving him anything.
- Fine.
956
01:02:09,515 --> 01:02:12,450
Then what you should do
is use the money
957
01:02:12,518 --> 01:02:14,679
to hire somebody
to storm into his shitty house,
958
01:02:14,753 --> 01:02:18,018
beat his ass, get the video
and then we'd be done with him.
959
01:02:18,090 --> 01:02:20,854
He's a crazy old fuck.
How much of a threat can he be?
960
01:02:20,926 --> 01:02:21,893
Are these yours?
961
01:02:24,830 --> 01:02:28,322
You should never have
cut school today, young man.
962
01:02:28,400 --> 01:02:32,530
See what happens when you're truant?
963
01:02:37,977 --> 01:02:40,912
Dad, he don't look so good.
964
01:02:40,980 --> 01:02:43,210
And you do?
965
01:02:43,282 --> 01:02:45,978
- Right now, let's go!
- Dad!
966
01:02:46,051 --> 01:02:47,951
He smells like shit again.
967
01:02:48,020 --> 01:02:50,318
- I do not!
- Stop.
968
01:02:50,389 --> 01:02:54,223
Gino, do you plan
on fucking it sometime today?
969
01:02:55,828 --> 01:02:57,887
Well, I was thinking,
970
01:02:57,963 --> 01:03:01,660
since he doesn't
look so great...
971
01:03:02,968 --> 01:03:06,631
- what if I just finger-fuck it?
- Oh God.
972
01:03:06,705 --> 01:03:10,505
Dad, Gino's scared of
the little man's tiny hole.
973
01:03:12,912 --> 01:03:14,641
I wish you would, fecal freak!
974
01:03:14,713 --> 01:03:16,738
Did you ever see that movie?
975
01:03:16,815 --> 01:03:19,215
This little guy around his age...
976
01:03:19,285 --> 01:03:21,344
he's walking to school
and gets kidnapped.
977
01:03:21,420 --> 01:03:23,012
Next thing you know,
978
01:03:23,088 --> 01:03:25,818
some psychic sticks her nose
where it doesn't belong.
979
01:03:25,891 --> 01:03:27,756
In the end, the kid gets saved,
980
01:03:27,826 --> 01:03:30,260
lives to see the light
of another day.
981
01:03:30,329 --> 01:03:32,160
Damned her clairvoyant ass anyway.
982
01:03:32,231 --> 01:03:34,222
No fortuneteller will come
busting through that door
983
01:03:34,300 --> 01:03:36,427
to save your sweet little hide.
984
01:03:36,502 --> 01:03:38,436
I'll tell you what will happen.
985
01:03:38,504 --> 01:03:40,768
You will take my man-size cock
986
01:03:40,839 --> 01:03:42,704
between your pretty little lips.
987
01:03:42,775 --> 01:03:44,675
Then, it's time
to give up the ghost.
988
01:03:44,743 --> 01:03:47,109
I'm not sure you know
what that means.
989
01:03:47,179 --> 01:03:49,579
It's pain. It's darkness...
990
01:03:49,648 --> 01:03:50,945
forever.
991
01:03:51,016 --> 01:03:52,984
You're gonna die,
you dainty little fuck!
992
01:04:01,060 --> 01:04:04,359
This is how I kiss.
993
01:04:09,301 --> 01:04:12,634
And I'm gonna kiss you all over.
994
01:04:15,841 --> 01:04:18,401
If there was a way
to be certain...
995
01:04:19,645 --> 01:04:22,842
You should have done
something at the time.
996
01:04:22,915 --> 01:04:24,849
It's fucking ironic
is what it is.
997
01:04:24,917 --> 01:04:27,750
A year ago, we could have
nailed his ass to the wall.
998
01:04:29,188 --> 01:04:32,521
It's a little too late for
"should haves" and "could haves. "
999
01:04:33,826 --> 01:04:37,387
What I have to worry about now
is how to get the money to him
1000
01:04:37,463 --> 01:04:39,795
without any traces back to me.
1001
01:04:41,033 --> 01:04:43,593
This is unreal.
1002
01:04:43,669 --> 01:04:45,796
He's going to get away with it.
1003
01:04:57,616 --> 01:04:59,743
Clean it up.
1004
01:05:04,556 --> 01:05:08,048
- He means you too, genius.
- Go on and clean.
1005
01:05:08,127 --> 01:05:09,389
Quit it, Frankie.
1006
01:05:24,543 --> 01:05:25,908
Hello?
1007
01:05:25,978 --> 01:05:29,436
I know you have it.
You would never let me down.
1008
01:05:29,515 --> 01:05:32,109
- No.
- Your mama didn't raise no fool.
1009
01:05:32,184 --> 01:05:34,414
Cut the shit!
This ain't no tea party!
1010
01:05:34,486 --> 01:05:37,284
Feisty. Don't get wise
with me, Mr. Fuckface!
1011
01:05:37,356 --> 01:05:40,814
You're fucking with the bull.
You know where I'll stick those horns.
1012
01:05:40,893 --> 01:05:45,853
Here's the news.
You'll be looking for a '64 Skylark.
1013
01:05:45,931 --> 01:05:47,865
Damn, that was a good year.
1014
01:05:47,933 --> 01:05:50,902
My Frankie had his first piece
of dick in a car like that.
1015
01:05:50,969 --> 01:05:54,097
Anyway, pull up the back-seat
and put the case in.
1016
01:05:54,173 --> 01:05:56,835
After that,
tell that old bastard Barron
1017
01:05:56,909 --> 01:06:00,572
that's not quite what you wanted.
Can he suggest something else?
1018
01:06:00,646 --> 01:06:04,377
When he does, that's where
you'll find your end of the deal.
1019
01:06:04,450 --> 01:06:08,147
That yard has ears, boy.
So don't try pulling any slick shit.
1020
01:06:08,220 --> 01:06:09,949
Money, then the tape.
1021
01:06:10,022 --> 01:06:13,082
Anything else would be
a tragic fucking mistake.
1022
01:06:13,158 --> 01:06:14,785
Capice?
1023
01:06:15,894 --> 01:06:18,055
"Do not enter. "
That's what you read.
1024
01:06:18,130 --> 01:06:19,461
Back it up.
1025
01:06:30,309 --> 01:06:33,301
Skylark? I've got one. A '64.
1026
01:06:33,378 --> 01:06:36,870
I got to shoot straight shit with you.
She's an ugly old whore.
1027
01:06:36,949 --> 01:06:39,281
- Ain't much to look at it.
- That's fine.
1028
01:06:45,591 --> 01:06:48,424
Joe-Joe, run to the pharmacy
and get me some eye douche.
1029
01:06:48,494 --> 01:06:51,258
- You do it!
- Chop! Chop!
1030
01:06:51,330 --> 01:06:53,730
Got to keep these monkeys dancing.
1031
01:06:54,800 --> 01:06:56,461
What's with the case?
Are you a stockbroker?
1032
01:06:56,535 --> 01:06:57,627
No.
1033
01:06:57,703 --> 01:07:01,605
Holy shit!
You're not in the syndicate, are you?
1034
01:07:01,673 --> 01:07:03,903
One of those La Costra Nostra?
1035
01:07:03,976 --> 01:07:05,841
You got a machine gun in there?
1036
01:07:07,980 --> 01:07:09,845
No, I sell pools.
1037
01:07:09,915 --> 01:07:12,145
- Where's the car?
- You might as well be in the mob.
1038
01:07:12,217 --> 01:07:14,344
The prices you charge ain't
nothing but a shakedown anyway.
1039
01:07:14,419 --> 01:07:16,444
I sell them,
I don't own the company.
1040
01:07:16,522 --> 01:07:18,353
I heard that before.
1041
01:07:19,791 --> 01:07:21,053
Well...
1042
01:07:22,494 --> 01:07:24,621
here she is. What do you think?
1043
01:07:27,232 --> 01:07:28,824
Last one in the yard.
1044
01:07:28,901 --> 01:07:30,368
At least in this yard.
1045
01:07:30,435 --> 01:07:33,768
Yo, Pops, you got a problem
with one of Tony's aftermarkets.
1046
01:07:33,839 --> 01:07:36,603
Tell him to hold his water.
I'm with a customer.
1047
01:07:36,675 --> 01:07:39,542
He said, " Go to hell and get
your wrinkled ass on the phone. "
1048
01:07:40,812 --> 01:07:43,679
Kick the tires.
Look it over, do something.
1049
01:07:43,749 --> 01:07:45,808
I'll be right back.
1050
01:08:07,039 --> 01:08:09,303
So what do you think?
Want me to gift-wrap her?
1051
01:08:09,374 --> 01:08:12,172
I was hoping you could suggest
something else.
1052
01:08:12,244 --> 01:08:14,940
Listen, Mr. Pool,
I have hundreds of cars.
1053
01:08:15,013 --> 01:08:16,947
You have to tell me
what you're looking for.
1054
01:08:17,015 --> 01:08:19,506
I'm not the Kreskin of the junkyard.
1055
01:08:19,585 --> 01:08:21,553
You are Mr. Barron, right?
1056
01:08:21,620 --> 01:08:23,645
I sure as shit
ain't jolly Saint Nick.
1057
01:08:27,292 --> 01:08:28,691
Shit.
1058
01:08:28,760 --> 01:08:30,591
I'd hate to be that guy.
1059
01:08:48,814 --> 01:08:51,009
Shit!
1060
01:08:51,083 --> 01:08:52,311
Fuck!
1061
01:08:52,384 --> 01:08:54,011
Damn!
1062
01:08:58,056 --> 01:09:00,547
What I'm saying is
he fucking ripped me off!
1063
01:09:00,626 --> 01:09:02,685
There still could be a tape.
1064
01:09:02,761 --> 01:09:04,626
Why wouldn't he at least
give you a copy,
1065
01:09:04,696 --> 01:09:06,823
just to let you know
he has one?
1066
01:09:06,898 --> 01:09:09,196
I think he's full of shit.
It doesn't make sense.
1067
01:09:09,268 --> 01:09:12,203
The fact that you think this guy deals
with anything on a rational level
1068
01:09:12,271 --> 01:09:15,263
speaks volumes
of how stupid you can be!
1069
01:09:17,709 --> 01:09:20,234
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have said that.
1070
01:09:21,513 --> 01:09:24,175
I know you're not used to me
being the voice of reason,
1071
01:09:24,249 --> 01:09:26,240
but you have to do something.
1072
01:09:26,318 --> 01:09:29,048
You gave him a chance,
you didn't get the tape.
1073
01:09:29,121 --> 01:09:30,952
You don't want to hear this,
1074
01:09:31,023 --> 01:09:34,288
- but you should go to the cops.
- Let's get something straight.
1075
01:09:34,359 --> 01:09:36,384
Calling the cops
is not an option.
1076
01:09:36,461 --> 01:09:38,691
Not until I decide it is.
1077
01:09:38,764 --> 01:09:41,961
He won't go away by himself.
You haven't given him a reason.
1078
01:09:43,402 --> 01:09:45,029
I know.
1079
01:09:46,672 --> 01:09:48,663
I'll be right back.
1080
01:09:56,315 --> 01:09:58,510
- Hey!
- Shitting with the common man?
1081
01:09:58,583 --> 01:10:00,813
I thought they built a throne
for your golden asshole?
1082
01:10:00,886 --> 01:10:03,286
- What do you want?
- An autograph!
1083
01:10:03,355 --> 01:10:06,119
We got your money.
We spent some already.
1084
01:10:06,191 --> 01:10:10,525
We were talking over dinner
on how you were a sweet boy,
1085
01:10:10,595 --> 01:10:12,859
so beautiful
before the consummation.
1086
01:10:12,931 --> 01:10:16,128
We want an encore performance,
1087
01:10:16,201 --> 01:10:18,829
- where you get fucked hard.
- Fuck this shit!
1088
01:10:18,904 --> 01:10:22,203
Easy. I wouldn't recommend
declining the invite.
1089
01:10:22,274 --> 01:10:25,209
If I show that tape, you go back
to being a party whore.
1090
01:10:25,277 --> 01:10:28,212
You don't show up, you get fucked
in more ways than one.
1091
01:10:28,280 --> 01:10:30,908
I want to taste you again.
1092
01:10:30,982 --> 01:10:33,473
- Get your hands off me!
- Oooh...
1093
01:10:33,552 --> 01:10:36,953
that's how I like it.
I'll be in touch, Vulgar...
1094
01:10:38,123 --> 01:10:42,856
to let you know about the party.
Make sure your tits hang out.
1095
01:10:42,928 --> 01:10:44,589
If you don't follow my rules,
1096
01:10:44,663 --> 01:10:47,962
people might see things that could get
a corn-holler like yourself
1097
01:10:48,033 --> 01:10:50,558
into some pretty hot water.
1098
01:10:50,635 --> 01:10:52,899
I'm going to fuck you again!
1099
01:11:13,592 --> 01:11:16,026
Shit! What happened?
1100
01:11:16,094 --> 01:11:17,721
What happened?
1101
01:11:17,796 --> 01:11:19,263
He was waiting
for me in the bathroom.
1102
01:11:19,331 --> 01:11:20,491
Shit!
1103
01:11:20,565 --> 01:11:23,329
- Did you call security?
- They're gone.
1104
01:11:23,402 --> 01:11:24,767
Fuck.
1105
01:11:24,836 --> 01:11:26,497
What did he say?
1106
01:11:26,571 --> 01:11:28,038
He said...
1107
01:11:30,308 --> 01:11:33,004
he said he wants us
to kill him.
1108
01:11:40,152 --> 01:11:42,120
Hey, man!
1109
01:11:42,187 --> 01:11:45,281
- Have you seen my shirt?
- You're wearing a shirt.
1110
01:11:45,357 --> 01:11:47,086
Get back inside.
1111
01:11:48,160 --> 01:11:51,687
Good to see you. Haven't been down
at the car wash in a while.
1112
01:11:51,763 --> 01:11:53,287
You know that tall jigger Lamont,
1113
01:11:53,365 --> 01:11:55,196
started working there
about a month ago?
1114
01:11:55,267 --> 01:11:57,565
No. Can we go inside?
1115
01:11:57,636 --> 01:12:00,833
He's this big jerk-off claims
I owe him 20 bucks.
1116
01:12:00,906 --> 01:12:02,464
"Fuck that shit," I said.
1117
01:12:02,541 --> 01:12:05,009
That's when... bam!...
he hits me in the mouth!
1118
01:12:05,076 --> 01:12:07,271
Like I said, he's pretty tall,
1119
01:12:07,345 --> 01:12:11,179
so I'm going to stay away
till he cools down.
1120
01:12:11,249 --> 01:12:12,807
Sounds like a good idea.
1121
01:12:12,884 --> 01:12:14,681
Yeah, Lamont, he's...
1122
01:12:14,753 --> 01:12:19,053
as tall as Jay James, but he's got
the muscles of James, Sr.
1123
01:12:19,124 --> 01:12:21,888
He walks around
like he owns the place,
1124
01:12:21,960 --> 01:12:25,225
slapping people in the mouth,
taking people's jumpsuits.
1125
01:12:25,297 --> 01:12:28,266
I fucking hate it
when that fuck's there.
1126
01:12:28,333 --> 01:12:30,563
Anybody around?
1127
01:12:37,809 --> 01:12:39,777
Don't mind the mess.
1128
01:12:39,845 --> 01:12:41,540
Hey, boy.
1129
01:12:42,814 --> 01:12:44,475
This is Larry.
1130
01:12:44,549 --> 01:12:46,642
I'm thinking of changing it
to something else.
1131
01:12:46,718 --> 01:12:49,152
That name reminds me
too much of Lamont.
1132
01:12:49,221 --> 01:12:52,213
- If only you were Lamont.
- Tuott.
1133
01:12:52,290 --> 01:12:53,621
Sorry.
1134
01:12:53,692 --> 01:12:55,717
Can you give me
a hand over here?
1135
01:12:59,531 --> 01:13:01,556
Can you believe I found this?
1136
01:13:01,633 --> 01:13:05,125
Right near the garbage
just waiting for pick-up day.
1137
01:13:06,471 --> 01:13:09,963
Between you and me,
I found it in some guy's garage.
1138
01:13:10,041 --> 01:13:12,066
I'm sure he would have
thrown them out.
1139
01:13:12,143 --> 01:13:14,043
What an idiot.
1140
01:13:14,112 --> 01:13:17,104
These two
don't have any bullets.
1141
01:13:17,182 --> 01:13:18,843
That's a BB gun.
1142
01:13:18,917 --> 01:13:19,884
Oh.
1143
01:13:19,951 --> 01:13:23,352
These two do have bullets.
1144
01:13:23,421 --> 01:13:26,151
And they come with these things
that go on the end.
1145
01:13:26,224 --> 01:13:28,215
- Silencers?
- Yeah.
1146
01:13:28,293 --> 01:13:30,386
They make the gunshots...
1147
01:13:30,462 --> 01:13:32,760
My friend told me that.
1148
01:13:32,831 --> 01:13:36,631
He said it's good because
they don't have serial numbers.
1149
01:13:36,701 --> 01:13:38,760
You need any skag?
1150
01:13:38,837 --> 01:13:40,361
No, I'm good.
1151
01:13:46,211 --> 01:13:48,441
Do you feel like
you're going to throw up?
1152
01:13:48,513 --> 01:13:50,811
I do.
1153
01:13:50,882 --> 01:13:53,373
Where did you get this car?
Whose is it?
1154
01:13:53,451 --> 01:13:56,648
Would you calm down?
You're making me nervous.
1155
01:13:56,721 --> 01:13:59,815
I bought it for cash.
It's untraceable.
1156
01:13:59,891 --> 01:14:02,985
One of Tuott's associates
helped me a little.
1157
01:14:03,061 --> 01:14:05,325
I can't believe
so much of our faith
1158
01:14:05,397 --> 01:14:07,661
is placed in an arch-junkie.
1159
01:14:07,732 --> 01:14:10,326
We wouldn't have gotten this far
if it weren't for him.
1160
01:14:10,402 --> 01:14:12,427
Thank God for Tuott.
1161
01:14:13,672 --> 01:14:16,505
I want to be certain of one thing.
1162
01:14:16,575 --> 01:14:18,372
Are you still 100% on this?
1163
01:14:18,443 --> 01:14:21,276
Yes. I told you that already.
1164
01:14:21,346 --> 01:14:23,906
I'm not going in there
to have you pussy on me.
1165
01:14:23,982 --> 01:14:27,145
- We have to be in and out.
- I know.
1166
01:14:27,218 --> 01:14:30,381
The longer we stay, the better chance
we have of getting caught.
1167
01:14:30,455 --> 01:14:32,616
And if we get caught,
we go to jail.
1168
01:14:32,691 --> 01:14:34,682
And what they did to you
will seem like
1169
01:14:34,759 --> 01:14:37,057
a church social compared to
what goes on in prison.
1170
01:14:37,128 --> 01:14:39,153
You've never even gotten
a speeding ticket.
1171
01:14:39,230 --> 01:14:40,663
How would you know?
1172
01:14:40,732 --> 01:14:43,701
Did you ever see "Caged Heat"?
It is the same thing,
1173
01:14:43,768 --> 01:14:46,635
except totally different,
because you're with guys.
1174
01:14:49,341 --> 01:14:52,105
- Got some coffee change?
- Sure don't.
1175
01:14:52,177 --> 01:14:55,374
Come on, just a quarter.
It won't break your bank.
1176
01:14:55,447 --> 01:14:57,745
Fuck you, tightfist!
1177
01:15:00,785 --> 01:15:02,980
My legs feel like rubber.
1178
01:15:03,054 --> 01:15:05,454
Maybe they thought
we called the cops.
1179
01:15:05,523 --> 01:15:08,287
- I doubt they're even in there.
- They're in there.
1180
01:15:08,360 --> 01:15:11,488
- I'm scared.
- So am I.
1181
01:15:11,563 --> 01:15:15,431
All right. Just walk in,
do what you have to do...
1182
01:15:15,500 --> 01:15:18,333
in and out. Can't be
any more dramatic than that.
1183
01:15:18,403 --> 01:15:21,998
- I'll be right behind you.
- I sure hope so.
1184
01:15:38,356 --> 01:15:40,051
Hold on.
1185
01:15:40,125 --> 01:15:41,922
Is it him, Dad?
1186
01:15:41,993 --> 01:15:44,359
- Please God, let it be him.
- Hold on.
1187
01:15:48,466 --> 01:15:52,027
Gentlemen,
the hole has arrived.
1188
01:15:54,372 --> 01:15:56,772
Calm down!
1189
01:15:56,841 --> 01:15:58,536
Don't go blowing
your loads yet.
1190
01:16:01,112 --> 01:16:03,580
Boom-boom, in and out.
1191
01:16:10,655 --> 01:16:13,283
- Are you alone?
- What do you think?
1192
01:16:15,960 --> 01:16:18,258
Get your candy ass
in here, then!
1193
01:16:26,371 --> 01:16:28,931
You must think your shit
smells like a spring rain.
1194
01:16:29,007 --> 01:16:31,066
Walk right by me
like I wasn't a person.
1195
01:16:31,142 --> 01:16:34,077
Next time I ask you a question,
answer me.
1196
01:16:34,145 --> 01:16:36,045
- Got it?
- Yeah.
1197
01:16:40,385 --> 01:16:42,979
It's mine now, motherfucker!
1198
01:16:47,459 --> 01:16:50,917
What do we have here?
1199
01:16:50,995 --> 01:16:54,226
Look at you
and all your finery.
1200
01:16:54,299 --> 01:16:56,995
Isn't he easy on the eyes?
1201
01:16:57,068 --> 01:17:00,265
Not really, Pop.
1202
01:17:03,975 --> 01:17:06,068
Give me a hand, buttercup.
1203
01:17:06,144 --> 01:17:08,704
Let me lead you on a trip
down on memory lane.
1204
01:17:08,780 --> 01:17:10,907
Do him like
you did last time, Dad.
1205
01:17:10,982 --> 01:17:13,450
Gino, last time,
Daddy had him...
1206
01:17:13,518 --> 01:17:18,080
- I know, because I was there.
- No, you weren't, liar!
1207
01:17:18,156 --> 01:17:20,818
You're such an idiot!
You know what I'm going to do?
1208
01:17:20,892 --> 01:17:23,224
I'll take you
to court for slander.
1209
01:17:23,294 --> 01:17:27,492
- You're a law-breaking freak.
- What are you talking about?
1210
01:17:31,236 --> 01:17:33,329
Shut up! You're scaring him!
1211
01:17:40,612 --> 01:17:43,206
Show us what you got hiding
under there.
1212
01:17:54,192 --> 01:17:57,684
- Gino, are you getting this?
- Yes. I'm not stupid.
1213
01:17:58,763 --> 01:18:00,731
A little more.
1214
01:18:10,241 --> 01:18:12,072
Shut that goddamn thing off!
1215
01:18:13,778 --> 01:18:16,872
I think somebody was fuzzy
with the instructions.
1216
01:18:16,948 --> 01:18:18,939
What were you thinking
when you got dressed?
1217
01:18:19,017 --> 01:18:21,042
You're here for me tonight.
1218
01:18:21,119 --> 01:18:24,919
Did that slip by you?
Are you brain damaged?
1219
01:18:27,192 --> 01:18:30,218
Turn it on. Don't miss
one second of this.
1220
01:18:30,295 --> 01:18:32,490
High and hard until we beat
the shit out of him.
1221
01:18:32,564 --> 01:18:35,328
High and hard. No other way
with a fuck like this.
1222
01:18:35,400 --> 01:18:36,662
You treat him...
1223
01:18:37,635 --> 01:18:39,364
Don't shoot.
1224
01:18:39,437 --> 01:18:41,462
We're sorry.
1225
01:18:41,539 --> 01:18:43,029
Oh God.
1226
01:18:44,876 --> 01:18:46,434
Is that the game we're playing?
1227
01:18:46,511 --> 01:18:49,036
You try to kill my boys,
my flesh and blood?
1228
01:18:49,113 --> 01:18:52,241
As it stands, you've got the hardest
night of your life ahead of you.
1229
01:18:52,317 --> 01:18:54,683
I hope you watched
the sun rise this morning,
1230
01:18:54,752 --> 01:18:57,186
- 'cause it was your last chance.
- Suck it!
1231
01:18:57,255 --> 01:18:58,347
Want me to shoot him?
1232
01:18:58,423 --> 01:19:00,220
Let me fucking shoot him,
Daddy!
1233
01:19:00,291 --> 01:19:03,260
How does it feel?
You know what's coming?
1234
01:19:04,429 --> 01:19:07,592
Don't fool with that thing.
Dad, tell him to put it down.
1235
01:19:07,665 --> 01:19:09,633
Shut up, chicken-shit!
1236
01:19:09,701 --> 01:19:12,363
Cut it out!
Dad, he's gonna hurt somebody.
1237
01:19:12,437 --> 01:19:15,270
Frankie, listen to your brother
and put the gun away!
1238
01:19:19,544 --> 01:19:21,205
Frankie?
1239
01:19:22,280 --> 01:19:23,338
Frankie?
1240
01:19:23,414 --> 01:19:25,245
Frankie! You'll be all right.
1241
01:19:25,316 --> 01:19:26,908
Just a couple
of stitches you'll need.
1242
01:19:27,986 --> 01:19:29,886
Frankie.
1243
01:19:29,954 --> 01:19:31,888
Listen to your dad!
1244
01:19:31,956 --> 01:19:34,424
Why did you do that
to my brother?
1245
01:19:35,894 --> 01:19:39,125
My brother!
You fucking, fuckhead!
1246
01:19:39,197 --> 01:19:40,425
You fucking pervert!
1247
01:19:45,703 --> 01:19:47,796
I got your man.
I want some money!
1248
01:19:55,580 --> 01:19:58,140
Syd, get up!
1249
01:19:58,216 --> 01:19:59,911
I fucked up.
We're going to get caught.
1250
01:19:59,984 --> 01:20:02,544
- What were we thinking?
- Stop it. You didn't fuck up.
1251
01:20:02,620 --> 01:20:06,215
- Yes, I did!
- You didn't! We won't get caught!
1252
01:20:11,362 --> 01:20:14,923
Get into the car and
out of here, all right?
1253
01:20:14,999 --> 01:20:17,194
- Get out of here!
- What about you?
1254
01:20:17,268 --> 01:20:20,362
I'll meet you back
at the house. Go!
1255
01:21:09,988 --> 01:21:11,546
All right. You caught me.
1256
01:21:11,622 --> 01:21:13,453
Now what are you gonna do?
Shoot me?
1257
01:21:13,524 --> 01:21:16,493
Go ahead,
you piece of shit. Do it.
1258
01:21:16,561 --> 01:21:19,724
It doesn't matter anyway.
You're finished, fuck-face!
1259
01:21:19,797 --> 01:21:21,731
Finished!
You're a murderer now.
1260
01:21:21,799 --> 01:21:25,257
You killed my boys.
You're going to prison. I have proof.
1261
01:21:26,337 --> 01:21:28,601
You don't have it
in you anyway.
1262
01:21:30,608 --> 01:21:33,202
You're shaking.
Even in this light I can see it.
1263
01:21:33,277 --> 01:21:36,144
You're scared.
Just lie down and take it.
1264
01:21:36,214 --> 01:21:38,341
I know you haven't got the guts.
1265
01:21:38,416 --> 01:21:39,781
So do you.
1266
01:21:45,456 --> 01:21:47,219
Not like this.
1267
01:21:47,291 --> 01:21:49,851
By this fuck.
1268
01:21:53,831 --> 01:21:56,425
Goddamn you, fuck-face!
1269
01:22:48,953 --> 01:22:51,080
Fuck you!
1270
01:23:24,255 --> 01:23:26,723
Flappy! Flappy!
1271
01:23:31,395 --> 01:23:33,590
Get down!
1272
01:23:50,214 --> 01:23:54,207
Well, once again,
injustice KO'd by Flappy,
1273
01:23:54,285 --> 01:23:58,949
of Flappy Funhouse fame
and our Special Girl Friday, Bella.
1274
01:23:59,023 --> 01:24:02,151
Let's have a big round of applause!
1275
01:24:02,226 --> 01:24:05,252
And let's have a bigger round
of good-natured boos
1276
01:24:05,329 --> 01:24:07,490
for our purveyors of
quite a bit of nastiness
1277
01:24:07,565 --> 01:24:09,192
around Flappy's Funhouse.
1278
01:24:09,267 --> 01:24:11,633
Our criminal clown brigade!
1279
01:24:16,474 --> 01:24:18,772
Thanks, Bella.
1280
01:24:20,711 --> 01:24:24,010
Now, that's all the time
we have for today, kids.
1281
01:24:26,484 --> 01:24:29,214
Don't be like these guys.
Stay in school,
1282
01:24:29,287 --> 01:24:32,654
and take care of yourselves.
'Cause you know what?
1283
01:24:32,723 --> 01:24:36,124
You're the only you you've got.
1284
01:24:36,194 --> 01:24:38,685
And I'm not clowning around.
1285
01:24:44,535 --> 01:24:47,561
♪ Kids, don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? ♪
1286
01:24:47,638 --> 01:24:50,539
♪ You know who's around?
Flappy the clown ♪
1287
01:24:50,608 --> 01:24:53,441
♪ If you feel blue,
he'll smile for you ♪
1288
01:24:53,511 --> 01:24:56,446
♪ He knows what to do,
flappin' at you ♪
1289
01:24:56,514 --> 01:24:59,415
♪ When you're not sure
if you'll see the light of day ♪
1290
01:24:59,483 --> 01:25:03,385
♪ He'll make you smile and play
with you, he does it every day ♪
1291
01:25:03,454 --> 01:25:06,719
♪ Hey! Kids, don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? ♪
1292
01:25:06,791 --> 01:25:10,283
♪ You know who's around?
Flappy the clown ♪
1293
01:25:34,952 --> 01:25:37,853
♪ Kids, don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? ♪
1294
01:25:37,922 --> 01:25:40,982
♪ You know who's around?
Flappy the clown ♪
1295
01:25:41,058 --> 01:25:43,856
♪ If you feel blue
he'll smile for you ♪
1296
01:25:43,928 --> 01:25:46,829
♪ He knows what to do,
flappin' at you ♪
1297
01:25:46,897 --> 01:25:49,991
♪ When you're not sure
if you'll see the light of day ♪
1298
01:25:50,067 --> 01:25:53,434
♪ He'll make you smile and play
with you, he does it every day ♪
1299
01:25:55,306 --> 01:25:56,933
♪ Hey! ♪
1300
01:26:03,347 --> 01:26:06,248
♪ Kids, don't feel down,
guess who's in town? ♪
1301
01:26:06,317 --> 01:26:09,650
♪ You know who's around?
Flappy the clown ♪
1302
01:26:09,720 --> 01:26:12,052
♪ If you feel blue,
he'll smile for you ♪
1303
01:26:12,123 --> 01:26:15,320
♪ He knows what to do,
flappin' at you ♪
1304
01:26:15,393 --> 01:26:18,362
♪ So when you're not sure
if you'll see the light of day ♪
1305
01:26:18,429 --> 01:26:23,560
♪ He'll make you smile and play
with you, he does it every day ♪
1306
01:26:23,634 --> 01:26:27,126
♪ Hey! Kids, don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? ♪
1307
01:26:27,204 --> 01:26:30,435
♪ You know who's around?
Flappy the clown ♪
1308
01:26:41,352 --> 01:26:44,651
♪ Hey! Kids don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? ♪
1309
01:26:44,722 --> 01:26:48,522
♪ You know who's around?
Flappy the clown. ♪
100898
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