Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:17,318 --> 00:00:20,352
(papers shuffling)
2
00:00:52,453 --> 00:00:55,587
(school bell rings)
3
00:00:57,591 --> 00:00:58,791
- Hey!
4
00:00:58,793 --> 00:00:59,758
- Sorry.
5
00:01:07,535 --> 00:01:08,500
Hey!
6
00:01:08,502 --> 00:01:09,535
Fucking give it to me, please!
7
00:01:09,537 --> 00:01:10,369
- Just let us see it.
8
00:01:10,371 --> 00:01:11,303
- No!
9
00:01:11,305 --> 00:01:12,037
- Come on, just let us see it.
10
00:01:12,039 --> 00:01:12,971
- Give it to me!
11
00:01:12,973 --> 00:01:13,839
- Okay okay okay, fine, fine.
12
00:01:13,841 --> 00:01:15,074
Not them, just me.
13
00:01:15,076 --> 00:01:16,241
- [Student] Dude,
come on, cut it out.
14
00:01:16,243 --> 00:01:17,910
- I won't take a
picture, I swear, see?
15
00:01:17,912 --> 00:01:19,111
- Jeremy!
16
00:01:19,113 --> 00:01:19,912
- Phone's away,
just let me see it.
17
00:01:19,914 --> 00:01:20,746
- Everyone is gonna see.
18
00:01:20,748 --> 00:01:21,747
- Hold on.
19
00:01:21,749 --> 00:01:23,382
We're negotiating.
20
00:01:23,384 --> 00:01:26,351
- Seriously man, just
stop being assholes.
21
00:01:26,353 --> 00:01:27,853
Come on, this is stupid.
22
00:01:27,855 --> 00:01:28,821
- Let go!
23
00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:58,050
- No no no, I got it.
24
00:01:58,052 --> 00:02:00,018
Take what's-his-face,
the Korean kid,
25
00:02:00,020 --> 00:02:02,821
fucking Kwong Wah
Kow or one of those
26
00:02:02,823 --> 00:02:04,156
horrible names or something.
- Dude, his parents are
27
00:02:04,158 --> 00:02:05,858
loaded, I should be so lucky.
28
00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:07,292
They probably pick me up in a
29
00:02:07,294 --> 00:02:09,962
hot tub rollover or
something (mumbles).
30
00:02:09,964 --> 00:02:11,897
- The kid in PE, (mumbles).
31
00:02:11,899 --> 00:02:13,532
- His (mumbles) would
warp the corsage.
32
00:02:13,534 --> 00:02:15,367
- Oh come on, it'd be your
good deed for the year.
33
00:02:15,369 --> 00:02:17,202
Pull a Christine
and have all the
34
00:02:17,204 --> 00:02:18,604
kids vote for him for prom king.
35
00:02:18,606 --> 00:02:20,072
- Dude, the movie's
Carrie, dipshit.
36
00:02:20,074 --> 00:02:22,241
- No no no, hold on, I
got it, I totally got it.
37
00:02:22,243 --> 00:02:23,242
You know who you should go with?
38
00:02:23,244 --> 00:02:24,076
- Yeah, who?
39
00:02:24,078 --> 00:02:25,010
- (whispers) Cyclops.
40
00:02:25,012 --> 00:02:26,411
- Oh my God, you're so fucked.
41
00:02:26,413 --> 00:02:27,980
- Watch him show up with
a parrot and a peg leg.
42
00:02:27,982 --> 00:02:28,914
- He's right there.
43
00:02:28,916 --> 00:02:29,815
- So go ask him.
44
00:02:29,817 --> 00:02:31,016
- No!
45
00:02:31,018 --> 00:02:32,151
- Come on, now's
your chance, go on.
46
00:02:32,153 --> 00:02:33,886
Fine, fine, I'll do it.
47
00:02:33,888 --> 00:02:34,920
Hey.
48
00:02:34,922 --> 00:02:35,754
Hey you.
49
00:02:35,756 --> 00:02:36,855
What's his name?
50
00:02:36,857 --> 00:02:37,689
- Mike?
51
00:02:37,691 --> 00:02:38,924
- Hey, hey Mike!
52
00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:39,758
Hey!
53
00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:40,592
- Shut up!
54
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:42,127
- Jesus, come on.
55
00:02:44,231 --> 00:02:45,063
Where are you going?
56
00:02:45,065 --> 00:02:46,932
- This is ridiculous.
57
00:02:48,402 --> 00:02:49,401
- We're awful.
58
00:02:49,403 --> 00:02:51,870
(chuckling)
59
00:03:22,903 --> 00:03:24,203
- Hey eyeball!
60
00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:29,808
There's something to your right!
61
00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:31,009
Just kidding.
62
00:03:33,647 --> 00:03:37,249
Careful, watch your,
nah, just kidding.
63
00:03:37,251 --> 00:03:40,385
Goddammit Matt, would you
stop fucking walking already?
64
00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:42,421
Get in the goddamn car.
65
00:03:49,029 --> 00:03:50,662
Hurry up, come on.
66
00:03:54,101 --> 00:03:56,635
Dude, so I got this new game.
67
00:03:56,637 --> 00:03:58,837
Open world, sandbox
kind of game.
68
00:03:58,839 --> 00:04:00,138
I dunno, it doesn't even have
69
00:04:00,140 --> 00:04:01,573
a name yet, that's
how new it is.
70
00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:03,976
My aunt grabbed this advanced
71
00:04:03,978 --> 00:04:06,144
beta testing copy
in LA, oh yeah,
72
00:04:06,146 --> 00:04:08,280
she's staying with
us by the way.
73
00:04:08,282 --> 00:04:09,548
You'll meet her, she's cool.
74
00:04:09,550 --> 00:04:11,183
Anyway, it's nuts!
75
00:04:12,219 --> 00:04:13,452
Anywhere you wanna
go, you can go,
76
00:04:13,454 --> 00:04:14,720
anything you wanna
do, you can do.
77
00:04:14,722 --> 00:04:16,421
You can steal jets.
78
00:04:17,558 --> 00:04:19,558
- No, you can't just,
yeah, that's why
79
00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:21,827
they got a joint
account, douchebag
80
00:04:21,829 --> 00:04:24,263
because it's both
of ours, you can't,
81
00:04:24,265 --> 00:04:26,531
yes, yes I did, every paycheck!
82
00:04:26,533 --> 00:04:27,833
Yeah, and if I don't
see every penny
83
00:04:27,835 --> 00:04:29,001
returned by Friday
I will stick my
84
00:04:29,003 --> 00:04:30,002
lawyer in your ass so fast it'll
85
00:04:30,004 --> 00:04:31,370
make your fucking head explode!
86
00:04:31,372 --> 00:04:32,904
Hey!
87
00:04:32,906 --> 00:04:35,674
Hey, can you go get Hunter
please, he's in his crib!
88
00:04:35,676 --> 00:04:38,176
Wait wait wait
wait wait, hold on.
89
00:04:38,178 --> 00:04:40,545
What do you mean until
I give back the ring?
90
00:04:40,547 --> 00:04:41,847
(Hunter crying)
91
00:04:41,849 --> 00:04:43,181
I gave back the ring.
92
00:04:43,183 --> 00:04:44,182
Yes.
93
00:04:44,184 --> 00:04:47,319
Yes I did, when you were here!
94
00:04:47,321 --> 00:04:48,253
- I got you.
95
00:04:48,255 --> 00:04:51,089
- Are you high or just retarded?
96
00:04:51,091 --> 00:04:55,060
Yeah, yeah, that's what I
thought, that's what I thought.
97
00:04:55,062 --> 00:04:57,596
- Mr. Cahill is out
sick, but he has left me
98
00:04:57,598 --> 00:05:00,866
instructions to have you
work on group projects.
99
00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:03,602
Today you will be
dissecting fetal pigs.
100
00:05:03,604 --> 00:05:05,003
If you do not feel
comfortable dissecting
101
00:05:05,005 --> 00:05:06,305
the actual animals,
there are computers
102
00:05:06,307 --> 00:05:07,539
set up on the side
of the room that
103
00:05:07,541 --> 00:05:09,875
will take you through
the virtual process.
104
00:05:09,877 --> 00:05:13,111
Okay, split up into
groups of two and you
105
00:05:13,113 --> 00:05:16,748
can find your specimens
on the back table.
106
00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:29,961
- Okay, so it says here we need
107
00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:32,431
to insert the blade through the
108
00:05:32,433 --> 00:05:34,132
body on one side of
the umbilical cord
109
00:05:34,134 --> 00:05:38,236
and cut posteriorly to
the base of the leg.
110
00:05:38,238 --> 00:05:40,872
What do you say, you
wanna do the honors?
111
00:05:40,874 --> 00:05:42,441
Okay, I'll do it.
112
00:05:45,946 --> 00:05:47,813
Who's getting hungry?
113
00:05:49,416 --> 00:05:51,416
That was a joke.
114
00:05:51,418 --> 00:05:52,784
Well, I mean...
115
00:05:54,254 --> 00:05:55,721
I'm a vegetarian, but it's also
116
00:05:55,723 --> 00:05:57,389
because of the
whole animal rights
117
00:05:57,391 --> 00:05:58,623
thing more than
just 'cause I got a
118
00:05:58,625 --> 00:06:01,927
waistband the size of
a low-flying blimp.
119
00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:05,831
(whispers) That was a joke too.
120
00:06:05,833 --> 00:06:06,665
Kinda.
121
00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:08,233
Okay, never mind.
122
00:06:09,670 --> 00:06:12,104
Extend a single cut
along the midline
123
00:06:12,106 --> 00:06:13,372
of the ventricular
surface of the
124
00:06:13,374 --> 00:06:14,573
animal to about two centimeters
125
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:15,841
from the chain, cut completely
126
00:06:15,843 --> 00:06:17,042
through the yadda
yadda yadda yadda,
127
00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:18,543
okay, what is this,
rocket science?
128
00:06:18,545 --> 00:06:19,511
All right.
129
00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:24,683
(whistle blows)
130
00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:28,987
- Hey, what's going on?
131
00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:32,991
- I wanna suck off
Justin Langsey.
132
00:06:32,993 --> 00:06:33,959
- Who?
133
00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:35,894
- Number six.
134
00:06:38,031 --> 00:06:40,565
He's so clumsy, I love it.
135
00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:41,867
I just wanna yank
down those little
136
00:06:41,869 --> 00:06:43,869
black shorts of his
and suck his dick.
137
00:06:43,871 --> 00:06:45,504
- Okay, all right.
138
00:06:46,473 --> 00:06:49,207
- But he's got a
small dick, you know?
139
00:06:49,209 --> 00:06:50,275
You don't believe me about this,
140
00:06:50,277 --> 00:06:51,443
but I've got a sixth sense about
141
00:06:51,445 --> 00:06:53,178
these kinds of things,
I do, seriously.
142
00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:54,446
- I believe you.
143
00:06:54,448 --> 00:06:55,747
- I bet it is the size
of a dry erase marker.
144
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:57,015
- Okay, do you wanna
just get out of here?
145
00:06:57,017 --> 00:07:00,452
- I don't care you know,
I'd suck it anyway.
146
00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:01,887
Probably make it easier.
147
00:07:01,889 --> 00:07:02,854
- Hello?
148
00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:05,724
- God he's beautiful.
149
00:07:05,726 --> 00:07:07,092
- Hey, you done?
150
00:07:07,094 --> 00:07:08,660
- Yeah, yeah.
151
00:07:08,662 --> 00:07:09,728
- Let's go.
152
00:07:10,731 --> 00:07:12,063
So the kid is just
standing there
153
00:07:12,065 --> 00:07:13,632
with his harmonica in his mouth.
154
00:07:13,634 --> 00:07:14,566
- Right.
155
00:07:14,568 --> 00:07:16,001
- And his dad's on his shoulders
156
00:07:16,003 --> 00:07:17,469
with a noose around his neck--
157
00:07:17,471 --> 00:07:20,672
- Oh shit, I gotta introduce
you to Jill, hold on.
158
00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:21,907
Jill!
159
00:07:21,909 --> 00:07:23,141
- Basically he's
just left to stand
160
00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:25,677
there until, basically
until he passes out.
161
00:07:25,679 --> 00:07:26,912
- Jill!
162
00:07:26,914 --> 00:07:29,014
- And his dad hangs
to death, it's insane,
163
00:07:29,016 --> 00:07:31,349
it's such a great, great shot,
164
00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:34,553
I'll have to show
it to you sometime.
165
00:07:34,555 --> 00:07:35,520
- Yeah.
166
00:07:35,522 --> 00:07:38,190
Wait, how does he play
the harmonica if hes's--
167
00:07:38,192 --> 00:07:39,724
- He's not playing
the harmonica.
168
00:07:39,726 --> 00:07:40,692
- Jill!
169
00:07:41,728 --> 00:07:43,528
- It's like, it's
just like a simple--
170
00:07:43,530 --> 00:07:45,197
- She must've gone out.
171
00:07:45,199 --> 00:07:47,833
You wanna play video games?
172
00:07:47,835 --> 00:07:48,800
Fuck.
173
00:07:50,270 --> 00:07:51,870
Shit.
174
00:07:51,872 --> 00:07:55,407
- So there was this
new girl in bio today.
175
00:07:55,409 --> 00:07:56,241
- Oh yeah?
176
00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:57,476
Is she cute?
177
00:07:57,478 --> 00:07:58,643
Is she cute, you
gonna ask her out?
178
00:07:58,645 --> 00:07:59,611
You gonna break some hearts?
179
00:07:59,613 --> 00:08:00,846
- Pfft.
180
00:08:00,848 --> 00:08:02,047
- What pfft, what do you
say it like that for?
181
00:08:02,049 --> 00:08:02,881
Come on.
182
00:08:02,883 --> 00:08:03,815
You are a handsome--
183
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:04,983
- I just mean--
184
00:08:04,985 --> 00:08:05,984
- You're a handsome
goddamn dude,
185
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,586
seriously, I mean it, you got
186
00:08:07,588 --> 00:08:08,887
this whole monocular man thing
187
00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:10,222
going on, total secret agent,
188
00:08:10,224 --> 00:08:13,625
total Nick Fury, Nick
fucking Fury man,
189
00:08:14,628 --> 00:08:17,128
except in the comic
books, not in the movie,
190
00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:21,566
you're not Samuel L.
Jackson, you're not bald.
191
00:08:21,568 --> 00:08:22,801
Or black.
192
00:08:22,803 --> 00:08:24,536
- But dude, she is
the size of a house.
193
00:08:24,538 --> 00:08:26,905
I mean she should save time and
194
00:08:26,907 --> 00:08:28,673
shove me in a trash compactor.
195
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:30,475
This girl would crush me.
196
00:08:30,477 --> 00:08:31,710
- No no no, she's not too fat.
197
00:08:31,712 --> 00:08:32,577
- Yeah she is.
198
00:08:32,579 --> 00:08:34,246
- She's not that fat.
199
00:08:34,248 --> 00:08:36,848
Just four feet too short, fuck.
200
00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:37,816
- What?
201
00:08:39,119 --> 00:08:42,954
- What do fat women and
mopeds have in common?
202
00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:44,389
- I don't know.
203
00:08:44,391 --> 00:08:45,690
- They're both to fun to
ride, but you wouldn't
204
00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:47,459
want your friends to
see you on either one.
205
00:08:47,461 --> 00:08:50,028
(laughter)
206
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:51,429
Right?
207
00:08:51,431 --> 00:08:53,164
- Okay, I have one.
208
00:08:54,668 --> 00:08:55,901
- [Elmo] Okay.
209
00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:57,736
- How do you find a
fat girl's vagina?
210
00:08:57,738 --> 00:08:59,204
- [Elmo] How?
211
00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:02,173
- You flip through the
folds until you smell crap.
212
00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:03,375
Then you go back one.
213
00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:05,744
(laughter)
214
00:09:05,746 --> 00:09:07,445
- [Elmo] Where did
you even hear that?
215
00:09:07,447 --> 00:09:09,848
- I don't know, it was on
the internet or something.
216
00:09:09,850 --> 00:09:13,785
- Hey where were you, we were
looking all over for you.
217
00:09:13,787 --> 00:09:16,588
Oh yeah, Matt, Jill, Jill, Matt.
218
00:09:17,558 --> 00:09:18,523
- Hey.
219
00:09:31,104 --> 00:09:33,138
Is anyone sitting here?
220
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:40,345
So you're Elmo's aunt?
221
00:09:42,816 --> 00:09:45,884
I mean that's
pretty weird right?
222
00:09:45,886 --> 00:09:48,186
How does that even happen?
223
00:09:50,324 --> 00:09:54,059
- His mom is my sister
and my dad's his grandpa.
224
00:09:54,061 --> 00:09:57,195
What, do you want me to
draw you a family tree?
225
00:09:57,197 --> 00:09:58,930
- No, no, I just...
226
00:10:01,234 --> 00:10:04,369
I don't know, 'cause I
mean my sister and I,
227
00:10:04,371 --> 00:10:07,238
we're like, I don't
know, I was just trying--
228
00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:08,907
- You was just trying to
make some weird roundabout
229
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:10,942
apology for hurting my
feelings the other day.
230
00:10:10,944 --> 00:10:12,177
- What--
231
00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:13,712
- Which is fucking
lame by the way.
232
00:10:13,714 --> 00:10:17,115
You can do that with a
fucking fat joke, ugh.
233
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:20,218
So you clearly
wanna make amends or
234
00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:22,187
pacify your conscience
or weasel me
235
00:10:22,189 --> 00:10:23,521
into bed or whatever
the fuck it is
236
00:10:23,523 --> 00:10:24,723
That you're trying to do,
- Wait, what?
237
00:10:24,725 --> 00:10:27,959
so why don't you just
get it over with?
238
00:10:31,565 --> 00:10:32,697
"I'm sorry"?
239
00:10:35,202 --> 00:10:36,835
- Okay, I'm sorry.
240
00:10:37,571 --> 00:10:39,437
- Do you mean it?
241
00:10:39,439 --> 00:10:40,505
- Yeah.
242
00:10:40,507 --> 00:10:41,473
- Great.
243
00:10:42,643 --> 00:10:46,945
We can be friends again,
take a seat (mumbles).
244
00:10:55,722 --> 00:10:57,188
So how long have you known--
245
00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:58,990
(student making cow noises)
246
00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:01,326
(laughter)
247
00:11:14,307 --> 00:11:15,607
You know what?
248
00:11:18,412 --> 00:11:21,780
This isn't really
doing it for me.
249
00:11:21,782 --> 00:11:25,483
You wanna get out of here
and eat someplace else?
250
00:11:25,485 --> 00:11:26,651
- Sure.
251
00:11:26,653 --> 00:11:28,019
I'll call Elmo.
252
00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:30,321
- Okay.
253
00:11:36,430 --> 00:11:37,896
Where are we?
254
00:11:37,898 --> 00:11:39,130
- Yeah, where the fuck
are we going man, come on.
255
00:11:39,132 --> 00:11:41,132
- No, it's going,
we're going to this
256
00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:43,568
cool cafe, bar,
diner type, I don't
257
00:11:43,570 --> 00:11:44,869
know what it is,
but there is a bar
258
00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:46,871
inside, we don't have to be 21.
259
00:11:46,873 --> 00:11:48,406
I used to go there all
the time with my sister,
260
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:52,277
they've got great food,
great corned beef hash.
261
00:11:52,279 --> 00:11:56,581
I mean they have salads and
stuff too, so you're all set.
262
00:11:57,651 --> 00:12:00,185
- Dude, did you
just call me fat?
263
00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:02,954
- What?
264
00:12:02,956 --> 00:12:04,189
- What the fuck dude?
265
00:12:04,191 --> 00:12:05,957
- No, 'cause in class
you said that thing
266
00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:09,027
about being a vegetarian,
so I just thought...
267
00:12:09,029 --> 00:12:10,729
No no no no, hey, I didn't--
268
00:12:10,731 --> 00:12:11,996
- You're an insensitive
motherfucker.
269
00:12:11,998 --> 00:12:13,331
- I didn't mean anything by it.
270
00:12:13,333 --> 00:12:15,533
Hey, hey, I'm really, goddammit.
271
00:12:15,535 --> 00:12:16,935
- Why don't you go
for a walk, okay?
272
00:12:16,937 --> 00:12:17,769
Take a minute.
273
00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:19,471
- I, I wasn't trying--
274
00:12:19,473 --> 00:12:20,705
- Why don't you just tell her
275
00:12:20,707 --> 00:12:22,073
to go on a diet
or something, huh?
276
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,742
- I didn't mean, that's not what
277
00:12:23,744 --> 00:12:25,376
I meant at all, goddammit.
278
00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:26,778
- What if she said something
about your eye, huh?
279
00:12:26,780 --> 00:12:28,313
What if she said
something about your eye?
280
00:12:28,315 --> 00:12:30,782
Would you be okay with that?
- I don't care, ooooh shit.
281
00:12:30,784 --> 00:12:33,585
(laughter)
282
00:12:33,587 --> 00:12:34,419
- We got you!
283
00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:35,220
- Nice!
284
00:12:35,222 --> 00:12:36,888
- That was so good!
285
00:12:36,890 --> 00:12:38,456
I wish you've could've
seen your face.
286
00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:39,457
- Oh yeah, that was good.
287
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:40,892
- Did you see his face?
288
00:12:40,894 --> 00:12:42,594
You literally looked
like I was about to shoot
289
00:12:42,596 --> 00:12:44,529
your fucking puppy, man.
- That's not fucking funny.
290
00:12:44,531 --> 00:12:48,133
- Come on, I was just
fucking with you, dude!
291
00:12:48,135 --> 00:12:49,734
Do I look like a salad
type of girl to you?
292
00:12:49,736 --> 00:12:51,236
I have my own fucking
zip code, man.
293
00:12:51,238 --> 00:12:52,203
- I don't know.
294
00:12:52,205 --> 00:12:53,505
- Oh, that reminds me of a joke.
295
00:12:53,507 --> 00:12:55,807
What do fat women and
mopeds have in common?
296
00:12:55,809 --> 00:12:57,242
- Elmo already
told me that joke.
297
00:12:57,244 --> 00:12:58,910
- Oh fuck you,
you fucking thief.
298
00:12:58,912 --> 00:13:01,179
- What do you mean fucking
thief, it's a good joke.
299
00:13:01,181 --> 00:13:03,915
- No, it's a shitty goddamn
joke, but it's my joke.
300
00:13:03,917 --> 00:13:06,050
- You can't take ownership of
a joke, it's everyone's joke.
301
00:13:06,052 --> 00:13:06,885
- Whatever.
302
00:13:06,887 --> 00:13:09,020
- That's how jokes work.
303
00:13:10,857 --> 00:13:13,057
- So what about you then?
304
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:15,193
I think it's gonna be great.
305
00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:16,427
- Can you get behind that?
306
00:13:16,429 --> 00:13:17,662
- Just, I don't have
road rage, okay?
307
00:13:17,664 --> 00:13:18,863
People that have road
rage do things that
308
00:13:18,865 --> 00:13:21,466
are unnecessary, I yell
when it's necessary.
309
00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:23,368
- Yeah, I'm telling
you you still have to
310
00:13:23,370 --> 00:13:25,804
be the bigger person
in that situation.
311
00:13:25,806 --> 00:13:27,539
- Be the bigger, have
you looked at me?
312
00:13:27,541 --> 00:13:29,474
I'm never the bigger person.
313
00:13:29,476 --> 00:13:31,342
- Never, I've known him
for a very long time.
314
00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:32,844
- Okay, all right, all right.
315
00:13:32,846 --> 00:13:34,946
(text ding)
316
00:13:34,948 --> 00:13:36,915
Oh shit, I gotta go.
317
00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:38,082
Look out, look out.
318
00:13:38,084 --> 00:13:39,417
- What are you doing?
319
00:13:39,419 --> 00:13:41,619
- My mother just
texted me, I gotta go.
320
00:13:41,621 --> 00:13:43,688
I forgot, I promised her.
- Where are you going?
321
00:13:43,690 --> 00:13:45,390
- I gotta go make
lobster triangles
322
00:13:45,392 --> 00:13:46,925
with her for some benefit.
323
00:13:46,927 --> 00:13:48,159
- [Matt] Lobster triangles?
324
00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:50,428
- Kids with AIDs
thing, whatever.
325
00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:52,897
Hey, can you drive him home?
326
00:13:53,733 --> 00:13:55,033
- Yeah, I can.
327
00:13:55,035 --> 00:13:57,135
- Great, okay cool, I'll
see you guys later, bye.
328
00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:58,102
- See ya.
329
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:08,913
I'm about, oh.
330
00:14:08,915 --> 00:14:11,282
(nervous laugh)
331
00:14:11,284 --> 00:14:12,483
- He's funny.
332
00:14:12,485 --> 00:14:13,451
- Yeah.
333
00:14:17,858 --> 00:14:21,826
(soft electric guitar melody)
334
00:14:53,827 --> 00:14:55,026
- Can I have a drag?
335
00:14:55,028 --> 00:14:55,994
- Sure.
336
00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:16,547
Nice place.
337
00:15:17,684 --> 00:15:19,317
- Yeah, it's okay.
338
00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:21,452
- Just saying.
339
00:15:29,162 --> 00:15:30,128
So...
340
00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:32,897
- What?
341
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:40,939
I got so much homework to do.
342
00:15:42,776 --> 00:15:43,975
- Huh?
343
00:15:43,977 --> 00:15:46,611
- Got that calc test tomorrow.
344
00:15:47,580 --> 00:15:49,280
- Right, calc test.
345
00:15:51,384 --> 00:15:53,384
- But thanks for the ride.
346
00:15:53,386 --> 00:15:54,619
- Yeah, sure.
347
00:15:56,556 --> 00:15:57,522
- Goodbye.
348
00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:58,489
- Bye.
349
00:16:21,448 --> 00:16:24,082
(dog barking)
350
00:16:30,924 --> 00:16:31,756
- Hey.
351
00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:35,760
- Shh shh.
352
00:16:35,761 --> 00:16:37,828
(gasps) You weaselly
motherfucker.
353
00:16:40,166 --> 00:16:41,833
- Did you have your
book club tonight?
354
00:16:41,835 --> 00:16:43,301
- Yeah, where were you?
355
00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:44,736
You were supposed to
watch him, I got home at
356
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:46,137
the end of a double
expecting to drop him off.
357
00:16:46,139 --> 00:16:47,638
- Yeah, I know, I'm sorry.
358
00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:50,775
- God, this kid came in
right at the end of my shift.
359
00:16:50,777 --> 00:16:53,478
Decided to blow his head off
with his father's shotgun.
360
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:54,746
Chickened out at the
last minute trying
361
00:16:54,748 --> 00:16:55,980
to split the
difference and instead
362
00:16:55,982 --> 00:16:57,648
lost his jaw, it's
a fucking mess.
363
00:16:57,650 --> 00:17:01,452
- I know, I'm so sorry,
just some stuff came up.
364
00:17:01,454 --> 00:17:03,921
Did you end up
skipping the meeting?
365
00:17:03,923 --> 00:17:05,823
- Nah, I took him.
366
00:17:05,825 --> 00:17:07,358
Screamed his head
off half the night,
367
00:17:07,360 --> 00:17:09,360
but it was a horror
novel, so whatever.
368
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:11,362
- Yeah, how was it?
369
00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:13,097
- Oh are you kidding me?
370
00:17:13,099 --> 00:17:16,234
It was shit, they're all shit,
but whatever, they're fun.
371
00:17:16,236 --> 00:17:17,201
- Good.
372
00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:23,841
Hey, can I ask you
something, and just
373
00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:26,344
promise not to...
- You shut up.
374
00:17:26,346 --> 00:17:27,445
What?
375
00:17:27,447 --> 00:17:28,880
Shut up, what?
376
00:17:28,882 --> 00:17:30,615
- Make fun of me or whatever?
377
00:17:30,617 --> 00:17:32,850
- Come on, when I have
I ever made fun of you?
378
00:17:32,852 --> 00:17:33,951
- Like all the time?
379
00:17:33,953 --> 00:17:36,187
- Right, but lovingly.
380
00:17:36,189 --> 00:17:37,488
So what is it?
381
00:17:39,259 --> 00:17:41,059
What's the question?
382
00:17:42,295 --> 00:17:43,828
Hello!
383
00:17:43,830 --> 00:17:47,765
- Okay, it's stupid, no, just,
sorry, forget it, never mind.
384
00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:54,372
All right, how...
385
00:17:55,575 --> 00:17:58,709
How do you tell if
a girl likes you?
386
00:18:32,645 --> 00:18:34,679
- So basically they
just go over the lake
387
00:18:34,681 --> 00:18:36,314
and then I just shoot
them with my twin gauge.
388
00:18:36,316 --> 00:18:37,615
- I'm kinda scared
of you right now.
389
00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:38,850
- Oh my gosh!
390
00:18:38,852 --> 00:18:40,284
- I'm just saying, I'm
just saying, it's like--
391
00:18:40,286 --> 00:18:41,686
- Oh come on, it's really fun.
392
00:18:41,688 --> 00:18:42,687
It's like basically just--
393
00:18:42,689 --> 00:18:44,255
- I kinda wanna, oh!
394
00:18:44,257 --> 00:18:45,690
- Whoa, what the fuck?
395
00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:48,826
Watch where you're
going, you fat...
396
00:18:50,063 --> 00:18:52,096
- I'm sorry, do you have
something you wanna say to me?
397
00:18:52,098 --> 00:18:54,132
- No, it's too easy.
398
00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:56,334
You have a beautiful day.
399
00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:05,076
- Sorry about that,
I don't know what's
400
00:19:05,078 --> 00:19:06,511
going on, they're not
normally like that.
401
00:19:06,513 --> 00:19:09,380
- Yeah, I'm pretty
sure they are.
402
00:19:10,783 --> 00:19:13,551
- Oh hey, I see
someone's in AP English.
403
00:19:13,553 --> 00:19:14,752
I love this book,
have you actually got
404
00:19:14,754 --> 00:19:16,287
to the part where Sally
tells Phillip that
405
00:19:16,289 --> 00:19:18,456
she's pregnant right
before he's about to--
406
00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:20,525
- Thanks for your help!
407
00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:30,635
- Ow!
408
00:19:30,637 --> 00:19:31,469
- Hey.
409
00:19:31,471 --> 00:19:32,303
- Fuck.
410
00:19:32,305 --> 00:19:33,571
- What's going on?
411
00:19:33,573 --> 00:19:35,573
- Nothing, just waiting.
412
00:19:35,575 --> 00:19:37,642
- Yeah, for Jill?
413
00:19:37,644 --> 00:19:38,876
- No.
414
00:19:38,878 --> 00:19:40,578
- Really, 'cause it's
her car right here.
415
00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:43,548
I mean well it's my mom's
car, but she's borrowing it.
416
00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:44,382
- Is it?
417
00:19:44,384 --> 00:19:45,616
- Yeah, yeah.
418
00:19:45,618 --> 00:19:47,718
Didn't she give you
a ride last night?
419
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:50,288
- Oh yeah, yeah, no, she did.
420
00:19:50,290 --> 00:19:52,223
- That's kinda weird,
you don't remember the...
421
00:19:52,225 --> 00:19:53,424
- I guess I forgot.
422
00:19:53,426 --> 00:19:54,559
- Forgot, that's seems weird.
423
00:19:54,561 --> 00:19:55,860
Anyway, check this out.
424
00:19:55,862 --> 00:19:57,094
Folks are going
to Norway on a bit
425
00:19:57,096 --> 00:19:59,564
of a buying trip, but
what the hell, might as
426
00:19:59,566 --> 00:20:01,666
well throw a (mumbles)
while they're down there.
427
00:20:01,668 --> 00:20:02,900
- Oh.
428
00:20:02,902 --> 00:20:04,001
Neat.
429
00:20:04,003 --> 00:20:05,269
When is it?
430
00:20:05,271 --> 00:20:07,838
- Next month, during the
regular prom-type prom.
431
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:09,073
- Okay.
432
00:20:09,075 --> 00:20:10,508
- Yeah, I talked to
Tonic, we're gonna
433
00:20:10,510 --> 00:20:12,610
get three kegs, have
some pizza, dance around,
434
00:20:12,612 --> 00:20:14,011
play some games that don't suck,
435
00:20:14,013 --> 00:20:15,112
whatever, yeah,
should be a pretty
436
00:20:15,114 --> 00:20:16,714
good time, but you should come.
437
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:17,915
What am I saying,
of course you're
438
00:20:17,917 --> 00:20:19,317
gonna come, what else
do you have to do?
439
00:20:19,319 --> 00:20:20,251
Sit around your house having
440
00:20:20,253 --> 00:20:21,686
no depth perception or whatever?
441
00:20:21,688 --> 00:20:22,620
- Come on.
442
00:20:22,622 --> 00:20:23,754
- Hey, how far's my hand?
443
00:20:23,756 --> 00:20:24,555
How far's my hand?
- Stop it.
444
00:20:24,557 --> 00:20:25,223
- How far's my hand?
445
00:20:25,225 --> 00:20:26,390
- Fuck you, man.
446
00:20:26,392 --> 00:20:27,325
- Anyway, I'm
gonna go to Kinko's
447
00:20:27,327 --> 00:20:28,392
and make some copies, and I need
448
00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:29,860
you to come with me, all right?
449
00:20:29,862 --> 00:20:31,696
So let's go, let's go, come on.
450
00:20:31,698 --> 00:20:33,197
- Hey, I really can't...
451
00:20:33,199 --> 00:20:34,565
- Oh hey, what's going on?
452
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:36,033
- What's happening?
453
00:20:36,035 --> 00:20:37,235
- Trying to get one-eyed willy
454
00:20:37,237 --> 00:20:38,769
here to go to
Kinko's for copies.
455
00:20:38,771 --> 00:20:40,705
- Mmm-mmm, sorry.
456
00:20:40,707 --> 00:20:42,974
Did you tell him
about our project?
457
00:20:42,976 --> 00:20:43,808
- What?
458
00:20:43,810 --> 00:20:45,409
- What project?
459
00:20:45,411 --> 00:20:47,211
- Wait, you really didn't tell?
460
00:20:47,213 --> 00:20:51,282
(laughs) We, this is so funny.
461
00:20:52,151 --> 00:20:53,985
Yeah, no, we have a thing.
462
00:20:53,987 --> 00:20:55,386
We have to go to the beach and
463
00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:57,488
collect 20 different types of
464
00:20:57,490 --> 00:21:00,458
shells for this
thing or whatever.
465
00:21:01,461 --> 00:21:03,294
Yeah, but you didn't tell him?
466
00:21:03,296 --> 00:21:05,096
- You have to go to the beach to
467
00:21:05,098 --> 00:21:06,964
collect shells in the winter?
468
00:21:06,966 --> 00:21:08,466
- I know, right?
469
00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:09,700
What the hell is wrong with
the teachers here, right?
470
00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:11,769
We're all of a sudden
in the third grade, man?
471
00:21:11,771 --> 00:21:13,738
It's like no, you won't
weasel out of this,
472
00:21:13,740 --> 00:21:15,840
I am not doing this shit
on my own, I'm savvy
473
00:21:15,842 --> 00:21:17,608
like a motherfucking
toothpick, so let's go.
474
00:21:17,610 --> 00:21:18,843
- Okay.
475
00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:20,111
- Yeah, no, I mean
I'm good to go too.
476
00:21:20,113 --> 00:21:21,212
- We'll see you at the house.
477
00:21:21,214 --> 00:21:22,480
- I'll call you.
478
00:21:22,482 --> 00:21:23,514
- [Jill] I'll just
see you, I'll see
479
00:21:23,516 --> 00:21:25,016
you tonight at the house.
480
00:21:25,018 --> 00:21:26,651
- Well give me an hour, I
can do the shells thing.
481
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:28,486
- [Jill] Yeah, I'll
see you later, bye!
482
00:21:28,488 --> 00:21:29,754
- Okay, well let me know
where you're going 'cause
483
00:21:29,756 --> 00:21:33,457
I can meet you later
if you want to, right?
484
00:21:37,096 --> 00:21:40,598
- You didn't have to
do that, you know.
485
00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:42,600
- I'm sorry, I just...
486
00:21:42,602 --> 00:21:43,901
I get to see him
all the time, I hang
487
00:21:43,903 --> 00:21:46,103
out with him every
day, and he's great,
488
00:21:46,105 --> 00:21:49,240
he's great, I just
know him so well.
489
00:21:51,110 --> 00:21:53,577
I want to get to know you.
490
00:21:53,579 --> 00:21:55,313
More than I do now.
491
00:21:57,183 --> 00:21:58,449
Is that weird?
492
00:21:58,451 --> 00:22:00,284
- Hey, are we going to
the beach right now?
493
00:22:00,286 --> 00:22:01,218
To collect shells?
(chuckles)
494
00:22:01,220 --> 00:22:02,820
- No, fuck that.
495
00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:04,689
What am I, a personal ad?
496
00:22:04,691 --> 00:22:06,724
No, let's go to the dump.
497
00:22:06,726 --> 00:22:10,695
(slow electric guitar melody)
498
00:23:02,382 --> 00:23:03,948
- Anti-prom?
499
00:23:03,950 --> 00:23:05,549
That's wicked cool.
500
00:23:05,551 --> 00:23:06,884
- Thank you.
501
00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:08,486
- Yeah, you did this
all by yourself?
502
00:23:08,488 --> 00:23:09,720
- Yeah, yeah yeah.
503
00:23:09,722 --> 00:23:13,290
- God, you're really
talented, that's cool.
504
00:23:13,292 --> 00:23:15,259
You go to Ben Frank?
505
00:23:15,261 --> 00:23:16,527
- Yeah.
506
00:23:16,529 --> 00:23:18,896
- Oh my God, me too,
I mean I went there.
507
00:23:18,898 --> 00:23:20,197
- How much is it, by the way?
508
00:23:20,199 --> 00:23:21,198
- It's pretty brutal.
509
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:22,166
- (mumbles).
510
00:23:22,168 --> 00:23:23,534
- Yeah.
511
00:23:23,536 --> 00:23:25,936
Hey, so where is it?
512
00:23:25,938 --> 00:23:26,904
The party?
513
00:23:32,812 --> 00:23:34,044
- It's in Laramie.
514
00:23:34,046 --> 00:23:36,914
So yeah, you should come.
515
00:23:36,916 --> 00:23:38,182
- Excuse me?
516
00:23:38,184 --> 00:23:40,117
- It's like shit, you
fucking faggots, man.
517
00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:43,354
It's unbelievable,
really, seriously.
518
00:23:46,759 --> 00:23:49,460
(music swells)
519
00:24:02,275 --> 00:24:03,107
- Bye.
520
00:24:03,109 --> 00:24:04,074
- Bye.
521
00:24:13,386 --> 00:24:16,754
(easy listening music)
522
00:24:29,535 --> 00:24:32,069
Hi, hey, is Matt right there?
523
00:24:32,071 --> 00:24:34,338
I just, I have his phone, I
wanted to return it to him.
524
00:24:34,340 --> 00:24:35,973
- I'm sorry, who
are you looking for?
525
00:24:35,975 --> 00:24:37,007
- Hey Jill!
526
00:24:47,220 --> 00:24:51,522
I just need the restroom quick,
just stay here for a second.
527
00:24:59,932 --> 00:25:01,432
- How old is she?
528
00:25:02,235 --> 00:25:03,367
- It's a he.
529
00:25:12,144 --> 00:25:15,045
(toilet flushes)
530
00:25:16,549 --> 00:25:17,681
- All right.
531
00:25:20,119 --> 00:25:21,085
Okay.
532
00:25:22,054 --> 00:25:23,020
- Yeah.
533
00:25:31,264 --> 00:25:32,363
- [Matt] Shut that behind you.
534
00:25:32,365 --> 00:25:33,330
- Yeah.
535
00:26:00,393 --> 00:26:02,459
Is this your idea?
536
00:26:02,461 --> 00:26:04,795
- Oh, no, it was like
that when we moved in.
537
00:26:04,797 --> 00:26:08,198
I just never got
around to changing it.
538
00:26:36,562 --> 00:26:37,828
- You play?
539
00:26:37,830 --> 00:26:41,465
- No, I used to, but
my hands are clumsy.
540
00:26:41,467 --> 00:26:43,801
Can't really keep a beat either.
541
00:26:43,803 --> 00:26:45,536
(piano music)
My mom got it for me
542
00:26:45,538 --> 00:26:47,237
right after the whole eye thing.
543
00:26:47,239 --> 00:26:49,073
I guess she thought
'cause my vision
544
00:26:49,075 --> 00:26:50,374
was messed up that
I should focus
545
00:26:50,376 --> 00:26:53,344
on something
auditory or whatever,
546
00:26:54,680 --> 00:26:57,815
but yeah, never got
past Chopsticks.
547
00:26:59,151 --> 00:27:01,185
� You risk it all for something
548
00:27:01,187 --> 00:27:05,489
� But baby, it's
never what it seems
549
00:27:08,928 --> 00:27:11,228
(humming)
550
00:27:17,470 --> 00:27:18,836
You sing, Matt?
551
00:27:20,339 --> 00:27:21,305
- No.
552
00:27:22,174 --> 00:27:24,174
- You never sang before?
553
00:27:24,176 --> 00:27:26,910
- I mean I'm not a good singer.
554
00:27:26,912 --> 00:27:29,346
- Will you sing with me?
555
00:27:29,348 --> 00:27:30,280
- I don't know it.
556
00:27:30,282 --> 00:27:32,182
- Come on, okay.
557
00:27:32,184 --> 00:27:34,752
We'll start with something easy.
558
00:27:34,754 --> 00:27:35,586
Right?
559
00:27:35,588 --> 00:27:36,720
Chorus is...
560
00:27:37,490 --> 00:27:39,790
� My fingertips are freezing
561
00:27:39,792 --> 00:27:42,493
� But I'll keep on believing
562
00:27:42,495 --> 00:27:47,097
� You'll feel these hands again
563
00:27:47,099 --> 00:27:49,466
Think you can do that part?
564
00:27:50,302 --> 00:27:53,771
� My fingertips are freezing
565
00:27:53,773 --> 00:27:57,107
� But I'll keep on believing
566
00:27:57,109 --> 00:28:00,978
� You'll feel my hands again
567
00:28:02,381 --> 00:28:04,982
� But something
warmer's always near
568
00:28:04,984 --> 00:28:08,118
� Found nothing yet
and I'll always fear
569
00:28:08,120 --> 00:28:12,022
� This cold world never ends
570
00:28:18,330 --> 00:28:20,264
- You're kind of amazing.
571
00:28:20,266 --> 00:28:23,167
- (scoffs) Yeah.
572
00:28:46,358 --> 00:28:47,324
Okay.
573
00:28:52,131 --> 00:28:55,766
I won't lie to you if
you don't lie to me.
574
00:28:56,802 --> 00:28:58,335
How's that sound?
575
00:28:59,371 --> 00:29:01,205
Just be real with me.
576
00:29:04,143 --> 00:29:05,275
Shake on it?
577
00:29:29,702 --> 00:29:31,268
- Oh God.
578
00:29:31,270 --> 00:29:32,236
All right.
579
00:29:36,575 --> 00:29:37,541
Oh shit.
580
00:29:39,645 --> 00:29:42,613
(heavy breathing)
581
00:29:54,727 --> 00:29:57,027
(moaning)
582
00:30:21,987 --> 00:30:23,053
How was it?
583
00:30:26,592 --> 00:30:29,893
- Like, you mean
like how did it--
584
00:30:29,895 --> 00:30:32,696
- Like was it okay, or...
585
00:30:32,698 --> 00:30:33,697
- I don't know, you tell me.
586
00:30:33,699 --> 00:30:35,632
- Oh God.
(laughs)
587
00:30:35,634 --> 00:30:36,600
Jesus.
588
00:30:40,873 --> 00:30:43,173
Have you done that before?
589
00:30:44,643 --> 00:30:48,445
Oh, sorry, don't answer
that, that's stupid.
590
00:30:53,185 --> 00:30:57,154
- Well I should probably
get going, so...
591
00:30:57,156 --> 00:31:00,858
- Hey, I just, can
I ask you something?
592
00:31:00,860 --> 00:31:02,359
- Sure, yeah.
593
00:31:02,361 --> 00:31:05,162
- You can totally say no if
you want, there's no pressure.
594
00:31:05,164 --> 00:31:06,363
- What is it?
595
00:31:11,537 --> 00:31:14,504
- Do you wanna go
to prom with me?
596
00:31:15,207 --> 00:31:18,609
(dramatic piano music)
597
00:31:58,884 --> 00:32:00,284
Are you wearing makeup?
598
00:32:00,286 --> 00:32:01,852
- (scoffs) No.
599
00:32:01,854 --> 00:32:03,453
Chicks walking around
with paint slathered on
600
00:32:03,455 --> 00:32:06,590
their faces, they look
like fucking Oompa Loompas.
601
00:32:06,592 --> 00:32:07,557
Seriously.
602
00:32:08,394 --> 00:32:09,927
Why, do you care?
603
00:32:10,963 --> 00:32:14,898
- Oh no, I just thought
most girls did is all.
604
00:32:15,734 --> 00:32:18,035
- Well I'm not most girls.
605
00:32:21,807 --> 00:32:24,274
(R&B music)
606
00:32:34,620 --> 00:32:36,053
What the?
607
00:32:36,055 --> 00:32:37,654
Oh no fucking way, dude!
608
00:32:37,656 --> 00:32:39,723
- Are you okay?
609
00:32:39,725 --> 00:32:41,124
Oh shit.
610
00:32:41,126 --> 00:32:43,794
Maybe I can get some...
611
00:32:43,796 --> 00:32:48,098
Can try and find some shoes
around here somewhere.
612
00:32:52,938 --> 00:32:55,906
- Wanna go to Elmo's thing?
613
00:32:55,908 --> 00:32:57,107
- You mean do I
wanna play cleanup
614
00:32:57,109 --> 00:32:58,709
crew for party of the year?
615
00:32:58,711 --> 00:33:00,110
Nah.
616
00:33:00,112 --> 00:33:01,745
- Yeah, me neither.
617
00:33:04,049 --> 00:33:06,516
- So what should we do then?
618
00:33:11,724 --> 00:33:14,257
(rock music)
619
00:34:01,607 --> 00:34:05,409
Who did you imagine
yourself ending up with?
620
00:34:06,145 --> 00:34:07,944
- [Matt] What do you mean?
621
00:34:07,946 --> 00:34:09,713
- [Jill] You know,
when you lie around
622
00:34:09,715 --> 00:34:12,682
and think about
girls or whatever.
623
00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:17,421
What do you think she'd be like?
624
00:34:17,423 --> 00:34:19,556
Is she anything like me?
625
00:34:23,529 --> 00:34:24,561
- Honestly?
626
00:34:27,933 --> 00:34:32,235
I just spent so much time
trying to get through each day.
627
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:37,707
Girls never really
crossed my mind.
628
00:34:39,745 --> 00:34:43,046
I know that sounds
so pathetic, but...
629
00:34:47,386 --> 00:34:49,753
What about you, what'd
you think of me?
630
00:34:49,755 --> 00:34:51,221
- Of you?
631
00:34:51,223 --> 00:34:52,689
- You can be honest you know,
632
00:34:52,691 --> 00:34:54,558
I don't care, I'm just curious.
633
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:55,525
- I...
634
00:34:56,962 --> 00:34:59,429
I thought you were handsome.
635
00:35:09,541 --> 00:35:10,774
Can I see it?
636
00:35:32,598 --> 00:35:35,732
(school bell rings)
637
00:35:36,802 --> 00:35:38,201
- [Matt] Sorry.
638
00:35:44,109 --> 00:35:45,108
- Check it out.
639
00:35:45,110 --> 00:35:46,810
Cyclops has a lady.
640
00:35:46,812 --> 00:35:48,411
(chuckles) If ever
there were two
641
00:35:48,413 --> 00:35:51,915
people who shouldn't be
allowed to procreate.
642
00:35:51,917 --> 00:35:53,216
- Maybe they're free.
643
00:35:53,218 --> 00:35:54,184
- Right?
644
00:35:56,355 --> 00:36:00,023
Fuck it, models
don't need to talk.
645
00:36:00,025 --> 00:36:01,358
Talking to you.
646
00:36:10,536 --> 00:36:11,735
- What happened?
647
00:36:11,737 --> 00:36:13,136
Okay, so you know
that list they posted
648
00:36:13,138 --> 00:36:16,106
in the hallway, the
one on the school list,
649
00:36:16,108 --> 00:36:18,108
which schools people
have gotten into?
650
00:36:18,110 --> 00:36:19,543
- Yeah.
651
00:36:19,545 --> 00:36:22,579
- Okay, well Justin Langsey
got into Pilgrim Mass.
652
00:36:22,581 --> 00:36:25,115
- Oh yeah, that's the school
you're going to right?
653
00:36:25,117 --> 00:36:26,416
- I mean at first I was
like I'll think about it,
654
00:36:26,418 --> 00:36:28,285
but now I'm like fuck
yeah, why not right?
655
00:36:28,287 --> 00:36:29,786
But that's not
even the best part.
656
00:36:29,788 --> 00:36:31,321
That's not even the best part.
657
00:36:31,323 --> 00:36:32,556
I'm standing there
and I'm scanning
658
00:36:32,558 --> 00:36:34,891
the list and all
of a sudden Justin
659
00:36:34,893 --> 00:36:37,527
comes up and he
looks at the list,
660
00:36:37,529 --> 00:36:41,264
so I point to my
name and I go hey,
661
00:36:41,266 --> 00:36:44,034
looks like we're going
to the same school.
662
00:36:44,036 --> 00:36:45,035
- All right.
663
00:36:45,037 --> 00:36:45,869
- Smooth.
664
00:36:45,871 --> 00:36:47,370
- Right, right?
665
00:36:47,372 --> 00:36:51,041
Okay, so then he says nice,
I'll see you there, right?
666
00:36:52,344 --> 00:36:54,144
Like he wants to
hang out, he thinks
667
00:36:54,146 --> 00:36:57,080
it's nice or something,
you know what I mean?
668
00:36:57,082 --> 00:36:58,315
- [Matt] It's something.
669
00:36:58,317 --> 00:36:59,783
- You know who I'm
talking about, Jill?
670
00:36:59,785 --> 00:37:01,284
Number six, basketball team,
(mumbles) the nice ass?
671
00:37:01,286 --> 00:37:02,552
- Yeah, we know.
672
00:37:02,554 --> 00:37:04,521
- Oh my God, the things
I wanna do to that ass.
673
00:37:04,523 --> 00:37:05,522
- We know.
674
00:37:05,524 --> 00:37:06,756
- I wish I could
tell you, I mean
675
00:37:06,758 --> 00:37:08,225
I've told you, but
oh God, I actually,
676
00:37:08,227 --> 00:37:09,492
and this is great, I had a dream
677
00:37:09,494 --> 00:37:10,860
the other night that
he came on my face--
678
00:37:10,862 --> 00:37:13,396
- Would you shut the fuck up?
679
00:37:14,333 --> 00:37:15,632
- What?
680
00:37:15,634 --> 00:37:18,401
- I just don't wanna
hear about it is all.
681
00:37:18,403 --> 00:37:19,603
- What are you talking about?
682
00:37:19,605 --> 00:37:20,870
- I get that you
wanna have sex with
683
00:37:20,872 --> 00:37:22,339
Justin, and that's
great, but I don't
684
00:37:22,341 --> 00:37:24,574
know why I hear about ever
single fucking detail.
685
00:37:24,576 --> 00:37:26,409
- 'Cause it's guy talk.
686
00:37:26,411 --> 00:37:27,577
- What?
687
00:37:27,579 --> 00:37:28,812
- I mean we're
guys, we're talking,
688
00:37:28,814 --> 00:37:30,013
I mean you tell me
about the girls.
689
00:37:30,015 --> 00:37:31,581
- No, I don't though,
when do I do that?
690
00:37:31,583 --> 00:37:33,350
- Right, you could
if you wanted to,
691
00:37:33,352 --> 00:37:34,818
and I would listen
to you right because
692
00:37:34,820 --> 00:37:36,186
that's how it goes,
that's what friendship is,
693
00:37:36,188 --> 00:37:38,388
we talk, that's what
it is, I'd listen.
694
00:37:38,390 --> 00:37:39,823
- All right, okay, yeah yeah,
695
00:37:39,825 --> 00:37:43,560
you're in love with
a homophobic asshole!
696
00:37:43,562 --> 00:37:47,197
- Yeah, well you're in
love with a fucking slut.
697
00:37:47,199 --> 00:37:48,031
- What?
698
00:37:48,033 --> 00:37:49,299
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
699
00:37:49,301 --> 00:37:50,600
- [Jill] Since when
was I in this fight?
700
00:37:50,602 --> 00:37:52,636
- Hold on, did
she ever tell you?
701
00:37:52,638 --> 00:37:54,804
She ever really
told you why she got
702
00:37:54,806 --> 00:37:56,006
shipped across the country?
703
00:37:56,008 --> 00:37:57,207
Has she really
gone into it, huh?
704
00:37:57,209 --> 00:37:58,942
- Can we not do this right now?
705
00:37:58,944 --> 00:38:01,478
- Jill, I'm sorry, has
she ever gone into it?
706
00:38:01,480 --> 00:38:03,680
All the 40 year old fucking men,
707
00:38:03,682 --> 00:38:05,815
skeezy, middle-aged
dudes that just
708
00:38:05,817 --> 00:38:07,484
wanna fuck some
big-titted teenager.
709
00:38:07,486 --> 00:38:09,152
- Fuck you!
710
00:38:09,154 --> 00:38:10,387
Seriously!
711
00:38:10,389 --> 00:38:11,588
- And they still call
her too, you know that?
712
00:38:11,590 --> 00:38:13,189
From 3,000 miles away,
and you know why?
713
00:38:13,191 --> 00:38:14,691
- You're a piece of shit.
714
00:38:14,693 --> 00:38:18,061
- 'Cause they know that
she's just that desperate.
715
00:38:18,063 --> 00:38:19,129
- Fuck you!
716
00:38:19,898 --> 00:38:22,098
- Hey guys, stop, come on!
717
00:38:22,100 --> 00:38:23,066
Come on!
718
00:38:30,142 --> 00:38:31,608
- Soon as my parents
get back from Norway,
719
00:38:31,610 --> 00:38:34,411
I am telling them everything
you've been up to.
720
00:38:34,413 --> 00:38:38,715
Running around, leaving
class (mumbles) to fuck this.
721
00:38:39,751 --> 00:38:40,917
They're gonna have you
back on a plane home
722
00:38:40,919 --> 00:38:44,487
so fuck it'll make
your fucking head spin.
723
00:38:48,593 --> 00:38:50,060
- Fucking idiot!
724
00:39:01,640 --> 00:39:03,606
- He's right you know.
725
00:39:05,344 --> 00:39:06,643
- What do you mean, about what?
726
00:39:06,645 --> 00:39:08,178
- I mean if I don't go home now,
727
00:39:08,180 --> 00:39:10,714
I have to go home eventually.
728
00:39:11,817 --> 00:39:12,782
- Why?
729
00:39:14,252 --> 00:39:17,187
- My stuff's there,
my friends are there.
730
00:39:17,189 --> 00:39:18,555
- Your friends?
731
00:39:20,192 --> 00:39:22,492
- I got into school there.
732
00:39:27,232 --> 00:39:28,465
- Wait, what?
733
00:39:29,234 --> 00:39:31,701
When were you gonna tell me?
734
00:39:32,771 --> 00:39:34,471
- Dad called today.
735
00:39:36,341 --> 00:39:38,475
The plane leaves Friday.
736
00:39:40,212 --> 00:39:41,678
- I mean what about graduation,
737
00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:43,847
you're just gonna,
just not gonna go?
738
00:39:43,849 --> 00:39:44,681
- I can't.
739
00:39:44,683 --> 00:39:46,716
- I mean what the fuck?
740
00:39:47,686 --> 00:39:48,718
I mean wow.
741
00:39:53,692 --> 00:39:55,175
Okay.
742
00:39:55,176 --> 00:39:56,659
So what, I mean
now what do we do?
743
00:39:58,330 --> 00:39:59,996
- Realistically
or ideally because
744
00:39:59,998 --> 00:40:01,564
I mean in a perfect world I want
745
00:40:01,566 --> 00:40:03,233
you to move out there with me
746
00:40:03,235 --> 00:40:04,701
and just pack your
shit and grab a
747
00:40:04,703 --> 00:40:05,869
plane ticket, but you wouldn't
748
00:40:05,871 --> 00:40:09,172
do that, that's crazy,
so I don't know.
749
00:40:10,842 --> 00:40:12,041
I don't know.
750
00:40:20,018 --> 00:40:20,984
- Okay.
751
00:40:23,722 --> 00:40:25,155
Let's do it.
752
00:40:25,157 --> 00:40:26,356
- Do what?
753
00:40:26,358 --> 00:40:27,724
- Let's go, I wanna
move with you.
754
00:40:27,726 --> 00:40:28,858
- Wait, are you serious?
755
00:40:28,860 --> 00:40:29,692
- Yeah.
756
00:40:29,694 --> 00:40:30,593
- No.
757
00:40:30,595 --> 00:40:31,961
You wanna move?
758
00:40:33,899 --> 00:40:35,698
You'd do that for me?
759
00:40:35,700 --> 00:40:36,766
Yeah, okay.
760
00:40:38,236 --> 00:40:39,702
- Yeah, I would.
761
00:40:41,440 --> 00:40:43,473
Come on, let's just go.
762
00:40:46,344 --> 00:40:47,310
Why not?
763
00:40:57,722 --> 00:40:59,122
- Better hurry.
764
00:41:00,792 --> 00:41:02,258
- [Georgia] Jill?
765
00:41:02,260 --> 00:41:03,493
That girl you met a couple
months ago, that Jill?
766
00:41:03,495 --> 00:41:05,161
- It was 12 weeks ago,
so that's three months.
767
00:41:05,163 --> 00:41:08,364
- Oh excuse me, three
months, that's a lifetime.
768
00:41:08,366 --> 00:41:09,799
- [Matt] Yup, I'm going.
769
00:41:09,801 --> 00:41:11,267
- Yeah, it certainly
looks that way doesn't it?
770
00:41:11,269 --> 00:41:14,003
- Mmmhm, we're going this
Friday and that's it,
771
00:41:14,005 --> 00:41:15,238
so if you have anything to say
772
00:41:15,240 --> 00:41:16,473
you can just keep
it to yourself.
773
00:41:16,475 --> 00:41:17,540
- So this, you're
just gonna, hey,
774
00:41:17,542 --> 00:41:19,209
this, you're just gonna skip it?
775
00:41:19,211 --> 00:41:20,610
One of the most
important days of
776
00:41:20,612 --> 00:41:22,946
your life and you're
just gonna flat out--
777
00:41:22,948 --> 00:41:24,781
- Yeah, I met someone, okay?
778
00:41:24,783 --> 00:41:26,483
I met a girl that
actually likes me.
779
00:41:26,485 --> 00:41:27,717
- You'll meet others!
780
00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:28,885
- Someone who makes
my heart feel like
781
00:41:28,887 --> 00:41:30,186
I'm not alone in
this world, who makes
782
00:41:30,188 --> 00:41:33,323
me feel like I
matter, like I'm sexy.
783
00:41:33,325 --> 00:41:34,624
Yeah, I know that sounds fucking
784
00:41:34,626 --> 00:41:37,260
stupid to you,
okay, but it's true!
785
00:41:37,262 --> 00:41:38,495
Fuck it!
786
00:41:38,497 --> 00:41:40,230
Okay, I'm going, and
you can't stop me.
787
00:41:40,232 --> 00:41:42,765
- You're in love with this girl?
788
00:41:42,767 --> 00:41:43,733
Go for it.
789
00:41:44,903 --> 00:41:47,837
Haul anchor, head
across the country.
790
00:41:47,839 --> 00:41:51,274
No plan, no money,
no safety net.
791
00:41:51,276 --> 00:41:52,709
That's what I did when mom died.
792
00:41:52,711 --> 00:41:54,844
I'd be a hypocrite
if I told you not to.
793
00:41:54,846 --> 00:41:56,713
Quick question for
you, how are you
794
00:41:56,715 --> 00:41:59,816
gonna pay for rent
when you're out there?
795
00:41:59,818 --> 00:42:02,085
First, last month's
rent, security deposit,
transportation?
796
00:42:02,087 --> 00:42:03,019
- I'll get a job.
797
00:42:03,021 --> 00:42:04,721
- Oh, of course.
798
00:42:04,723 --> 00:42:06,789
I'm sure that you will,
the economy's just kicking.
799
00:42:06,791 --> 00:42:08,057
- Just leave me
alone, okay, please.
800
00:42:08,059 --> 00:42:08,992
- Just on the off
chance you don't,
801
00:42:08,994 --> 00:42:10,226
what are you gonna do then?
802
00:42:10,228 --> 00:42:13,029
- Just get the fuck out of here!
803
00:42:21,039 --> 00:42:22,005
Jesus.
804
00:42:23,275 --> 00:42:24,240
Goddammit.
805
00:42:34,853 --> 00:42:37,654
(alarm ringing)
806
00:42:39,724 --> 00:42:43,593
(dramatic synthesizer music)
807
00:43:44,522 --> 00:43:46,456
- [Jill] Oh my God, I
can't wait to see you,
808
00:43:46,458 --> 00:43:47,824
it's been so frigging
long, I feel like
809
00:43:47,826 --> 00:43:51,060
I'm gonna die if I don't
get to fuck you soon.
810
00:43:51,062 --> 00:43:55,098
- Yeah, no, I'm looking
forward to that too.
811
00:43:55,100 --> 00:43:56,899
- [Jill] I hope so
because I've got a
812
00:43:56,901 --> 00:43:59,235
special surprise for
you when you get here.
813
00:43:59,237 --> 00:44:00,203
- Oh yeah?
814
00:44:00,872 --> 00:44:02,372
What is it?
815
00:44:02,374 --> 00:44:05,441
- [Jill] If I told you, it
wouldn't be a surprise, dummy.
816
00:44:05,443 --> 00:44:06,743
Trust me, you'll like it.
817
00:44:06,745 --> 00:44:07,710
- Okay.
818
00:44:08,413 --> 00:44:09,646
- [Jill] What about you?
819
00:44:09,648 --> 00:44:11,447
Bringing anything for me?
820
00:44:11,449 --> 00:44:13,416
- I don't know, maybe.
821
00:44:16,454 --> 00:44:17,887
- So are we just
gonna ignore the fact
822
00:44:17,889 --> 00:44:20,023
that you've got a
second eye now, or...
823
00:44:20,025 --> 00:44:21,758
- I kept waiting for
you to ask about it.
824
00:44:21,760 --> 00:44:23,026
- I mean I didn't
wanna just bring it,
825
00:44:23,028 --> 00:44:25,828
I mean it seems
like it'd be rude.
826
00:44:25,830 --> 00:44:26,763
- No.
827
00:44:26,765 --> 00:44:28,931
- So what, was it surgery or...
828
00:44:28,933 --> 00:44:32,001
- No no no no, it's
just a prosthetic.
829
00:44:32,003 --> 00:44:34,070
- Oh, so like glass?
830
00:44:34,072 --> 00:44:37,473
- Plastic acrylic is
what they call it.
831
00:44:39,277 --> 00:44:40,243
- Cool.
832
00:44:40,979 --> 00:44:42,145
- I mean how does it look?
833
00:44:42,147 --> 00:44:43,713
- No, yeah, no, it
looks, yeah, it's good.
834
00:44:43,715 --> 00:44:45,181
Yeah, it's cool.
835
00:44:46,284 --> 00:44:47,250
- Good.
836
00:44:49,254 --> 00:44:53,022
- So how long you
gonna be gone for?
837
00:44:53,024 --> 00:44:54,323
- Just a week.
838
00:44:57,295 --> 00:45:01,064
This is part one of our
two part plan, so...
839
00:45:02,033 --> 00:45:03,666
- What's part two?
840
00:45:05,136 --> 00:45:06,936
- To move out there.
841
00:45:22,287 --> 00:45:25,855
All right, well
thanks for the ride.
842
00:45:25,857 --> 00:45:27,523
- Hey man, have a safe trip.
843
00:45:27,525 --> 00:45:28,491
- Okay.
844
00:45:29,728 --> 00:45:30,693
See ya.
845
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:38,468
- Hey Matt, wait a minute.
846
00:45:38,470 --> 00:45:39,435
- Hmm?
847
00:45:43,308 --> 00:45:45,274
- When you see Jill...
848
00:45:47,445 --> 00:45:49,178
Tell her I'm sorry?
849
00:46:25,383 --> 00:46:28,584
(gentle piano music)
850
00:46:52,177 --> 00:46:53,543
- Hey stranger.
851
00:47:04,355 --> 00:47:05,288
Surprise.
852
00:47:28,346 --> 00:47:30,713
So I'm liking the new look.
853
00:47:31,749 --> 00:47:32,882
Is it glass?
854
00:47:34,352 --> 00:47:36,152
- Plastic acrylic.
855
00:47:36,154 --> 00:47:37,119
- Mmmm.
856
00:47:38,122 --> 00:47:39,689
It looks really good.
857
00:47:39,691 --> 00:47:40,990
Very lifelike.
858
00:47:50,034 --> 00:47:51,734
I took a bunch of
pictures before I
859
00:47:51,736 --> 00:47:55,404
started and been
sending you those.
860
00:47:55,406 --> 00:47:58,741
In case you were wondering
why doesn't it match.
861
00:47:58,743 --> 00:48:01,077
(chuckles)
862
00:48:04,015 --> 00:48:04,981
So...
863
00:48:07,619 --> 00:48:08,551
What do you think?
864
00:48:08,553 --> 00:48:11,120
- You're gonna miss your turn.
865
00:48:13,658 --> 00:48:14,624
- Thanks.
866
00:48:16,261 --> 00:48:19,462
Science building, math
building, art studio
867
00:48:19,464 --> 00:48:22,098
is back there as well
as the music studio.
868
00:48:22,100 --> 00:48:23,332
That's where I've been spending
869
00:48:23,334 --> 00:48:25,601
most of my time, where
all my classes are.
870
00:48:25,603 --> 00:48:27,136
I'm all stocked up
on music electives,
871
00:48:27,138 --> 00:48:29,372
but I'm gonna be
fucked senior year
872
00:48:29,374 --> 00:48:30,640
when I have to fulfill the ones
873
00:48:30,642 --> 00:48:33,476
I'm supposed to, but
living in the moment.
874
00:48:33,478 --> 00:48:35,478
- [Frat Boy] Spin man,
spin spin spin spin spin!
875
00:48:35,480 --> 00:48:36,712
- Come on Pat, you got this guy!
876
00:48:36,714 --> 00:48:38,080
- [Frat Boy] Come on
man, you got this!
877
00:48:38,082 --> 00:48:39,615
Come on, come on!
878
00:48:40,785 --> 00:48:43,152
Go baby, come on, come on!
879
00:48:43,154 --> 00:48:45,388
You got him, you got him!
880
00:48:47,725 --> 00:48:49,926
Come on, come on, go, go!
881
00:48:51,562 --> 00:48:52,828
- [Frat Boy 2] Go baby, come on!
882
00:48:52,830 --> 00:48:53,829
- [Frat Boy] All right
man, chug it, chug it!
883
00:48:53,831 --> 00:48:55,197
- [Frat Boy 2] Come on!
884
00:48:55,199 --> 00:48:56,032
Man, you got it!
885
00:48:56,034 --> 00:48:57,099
- [Frat Boy] Come on!
886
00:48:57,101 --> 00:48:58,634
Come on, jabroni!
887
00:48:59,737 --> 00:49:01,637
You got it, you
got it, swing it.
888
00:49:01,639 --> 00:49:02,738
Bam!
889
00:49:02,740 --> 00:49:05,374
(cheering)
890
00:49:05,376 --> 00:49:06,776
- In your face!
891
00:49:07,512 --> 00:49:10,279
Oh my God, that's some goodness.
892
00:49:12,183 --> 00:49:14,183
- You see something you like?
893
00:49:14,185 --> 00:49:15,584
- What?
894
00:49:15,586 --> 00:49:18,754
No no, I just, I know that girl.
895
00:49:18,756 --> 00:49:20,790
She went to my high
school for a little bit.
896
00:49:20,792 --> 00:49:22,425
- You should've brought
her to the Cattle Call.
897
00:49:22,427 --> 00:49:25,895
That ass alone will
put us over the top.
898
00:49:32,603 --> 00:49:33,836
- Hey!
899
00:49:33,838 --> 00:49:34,837
- [Rachel] Hi!
900
00:49:34,839 --> 00:49:37,373
(cheers and laughter)
901
00:49:37,375 --> 00:49:39,375
- [Jill] Okay everyone,
everyone, okay, this is Matt.
902
00:49:39,377 --> 00:49:40,209
- Hi Matt.
903
00:49:40,211 --> 00:49:41,143
- Hi.
904
00:49:41,145 --> 00:49:43,612
- James, Sarah, Rachel, Andy.
905
00:49:44,882 --> 00:49:46,482
- [Matt] James, Rachel, Andy?
906
00:49:46,484 --> 00:49:47,583
- Rachel, yes.
907
00:49:47,585 --> 00:49:48,517
- [Matt] Got it.
908
00:49:48,519 --> 00:49:49,418
I'm Matt, nice to meet you.
909
00:49:49,420 --> 00:49:50,519
- Nice to meet you.
910
00:49:50,521 --> 00:49:52,421
(crosstalk)
911
00:49:52,423 --> 00:49:54,323
- [Sarah] I have to run,
so I'll see you guys later.
912
00:49:54,325 --> 00:49:55,291
- Okay, I'll see you later.
913
00:49:55,293 --> 00:49:56,525
- See you later!
914
00:49:56,527 --> 00:49:57,994
- I have a good one if
nobody else gets it.
915
00:49:57,996 --> 00:49:59,061
- The graveyard.
916
00:49:59,063 --> 00:50:00,396
- Ewww!
917
00:50:00,398 --> 00:50:01,497
- That is bullshit.
918
00:50:01,499 --> 00:50:03,032
- No, that is
absolutely true, in fact
919
00:50:03,034 --> 00:50:05,534
my first kiss was
in a graveyard.
920
00:50:05,536 --> 00:50:07,069
- On whose grave?
921
00:50:08,172 --> 00:50:09,605
- Priscilla Sears.
922
00:50:09,607 --> 00:50:11,040
- [James] Okay, I
have a better one,
923
00:50:11,042 --> 00:50:12,908
I have a better one,
I have a better one.
924
00:50:12,910 --> 00:50:14,477
Okay, it wasn't sex, but I did
925
00:50:14,479 --> 00:50:16,445
get a handjob in a
grandfather clock.
926
00:50:16,447 --> 00:50:17,580
- Oh my God.
927
00:50:18,516 --> 00:50:20,049
How is that possible?
928
00:50:20,051 --> 00:50:21,450
- [James] It was a
large grandfather clock.
929
00:50:21,452 --> 00:50:22,651
- [Andy] A large
grandfather clock.
930
00:50:22,653 --> 00:50:24,153
- [James] It was like
imagine the size--
931
00:50:24,155 --> 00:50:25,321
- [Andy] Can I just tell you
what I'm imagining right now?
932
00:50:25,323 --> 00:50:26,922
- [James] Please, yeah.
933
00:50:26,924 --> 00:50:28,324
- [Andy] So it's
just like here's this
934
00:50:28,326 --> 00:50:30,292
grandfather clock
and you're inside it?
935
00:50:30,294 --> 00:50:31,227
- [James] Yeah.
936
00:50:31,229 --> 00:50:32,428
- [Andy] She's just outside it?
937
00:50:32,430 --> 00:50:33,095
- [James] No, we're
both inside it!
938
00:50:33,097 --> 00:50:33,929
I'm a gentleman.
939
00:50:33,931 --> 00:50:35,798
(laughter)
940
00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:38,801
- [Andy] That's some bullshit.
941
00:50:38,803 --> 00:50:40,369
- [Rachel] Grandfather
clock though.
942
00:50:40,371 --> 00:50:41,771
- [James] Do I win, do I win?
943
00:50:41,773 --> 00:50:43,939
- [Andy] I don't know,
does grandfather clock.
944
00:50:43,941 --> 00:50:45,541
- Hey, hey, how about her?
945
00:50:45,543 --> 00:50:46,509
- Which one?
946
00:50:46,511 --> 00:50:48,110
- The blonde girl, white shirt.
947
00:50:48,112 --> 00:50:49,612
- Nah, too thing.
948
00:50:49,614 --> 00:50:50,746
- All right.
949
00:50:51,949 --> 00:50:54,016
Oh, oh, what about her?
950
00:50:55,086 --> 00:50:58,554
In the, what you call
them, the jeggings.
951
00:50:58,556 --> 00:50:59,889
- Are you kidding me?
952
00:50:59,891 --> 00:51:01,323
- What?
953
00:51:01,325 --> 00:51:03,492
- Seriously, she's
completely normal.
954
00:51:03,494 --> 00:51:04,660
- That's normal?
955
00:51:04,662 --> 00:51:05,728
- Yeah.
956
00:51:05,730 --> 00:51:06,929
- That's normal?
957
00:51:06,931 --> 00:51:08,431
- Yes it is.
958
00:51:08,433 --> 00:51:11,033
- Okay, maybe back in
Wisconsin with the farm girls--
959
00:51:11,035 --> 00:51:13,002
- Dude, I'm from Rhode Island.
960
00:51:13,004 --> 00:51:15,304
- All right, well whatever, man.
961
00:51:15,306 --> 00:51:17,039
You tell me then.
962
00:51:17,041 --> 00:51:19,475
What are we looking for, huh?
963
00:51:19,477 --> 00:51:20,443
What?
964
00:51:30,955 --> 00:51:33,289
- It's so nice, is it
like this every day?
965
00:51:33,291 --> 00:51:34,457
- Yes.
966
00:51:34,459 --> 00:51:37,126
That's why I love it here.
967
00:51:37,128 --> 00:51:39,829
(guy whistles)
968
00:51:44,402 --> 00:51:45,367
- Thanks.
969
00:51:48,473 --> 00:51:50,940
- Okay, so I have
no way to prove it,
970
00:51:50,942 --> 00:51:52,608
but I'm pretty sure
the mirror in the
971
00:51:52,610 --> 00:51:54,577
bathroom is one
of those two-sided
972
00:51:54,579 --> 00:51:56,112
mirrors you see in cop shows.
973
00:51:56,114 --> 00:51:57,346
- [Matt] No way.
974
00:51:57,348 --> 00:52:00,082
- Yes, because I
could see a figure.
975
00:52:01,786 --> 00:52:02,651
- Thank you.
976
00:52:02,653 --> 00:52:04,019
You could what?
977
00:52:04,822 --> 00:52:06,088
- What is this?
978
00:52:06,090 --> 00:52:07,022
- Hmm?
979
00:52:08,693 --> 00:52:10,292
- When did you order these?
980
00:52:10,294 --> 00:52:12,995
- While you were
in the restroom.
981
00:52:12,997 --> 00:52:15,131
- I told you I
didn't want dessert.
982
00:52:15,133 --> 00:52:17,333
- Yeah, I know, I just thought
983
00:52:17,335 --> 00:52:18,801
I haven't seen you in a while,
984
00:52:18,803 --> 00:52:20,669
so I thought we
should celebrate.
985
00:52:20,671 --> 00:52:24,206
- Right, but I told
you I didn't want any.
986
00:52:24,208 --> 00:52:26,142
- Oh come on, just have
some ice cream with me.
987
00:52:26,144 --> 00:52:26,976
- I'm good.
988
00:52:26,978 --> 00:52:28,210
- I'm paying.
989
00:52:29,347 --> 00:52:30,379
- I'm good.
990
00:52:35,153 --> 00:52:36,385
- You know that's all I could
991
00:52:36,387 --> 00:52:37,586
think about on the
plane down here?
992
00:52:37,588 --> 00:52:39,088
- What, taking a
baseball bat to the
993
00:52:39,090 --> 00:52:41,123
tiny shred of willpower
I've developed?
994
00:52:41,125 --> 00:52:44,426
- No, just buying
you meals and stuff.
995
00:52:46,164 --> 00:52:47,730
'Cause you always did
the buying before.
996
00:52:47,732 --> 00:52:50,566
- My parents did the buying,
it was their credit card.
997
00:52:50,568 --> 00:52:52,067
- Well I finally
saved up some money
998
00:52:52,069 --> 00:52:54,336
and I've been working
like you wouldn't believe.
999
00:52:54,338 --> 00:52:55,638
I just thought it would be nice
1000
00:52:55,640 --> 00:52:56,906
to take you out for a meal and--
1001
00:52:56,908 --> 00:52:58,574
- Hey, you can pay
for the dinner.
1002
00:52:58,576 --> 00:52:59,808
- A salad?
1003
00:52:59,810 --> 00:53:01,277
What is that, come
on, that's not a meal.
1004
00:53:01,279 --> 00:53:02,945
- It had chicken on
it, that's protein.
1005
00:53:02,947 --> 00:53:04,146
That makes it a meal.
1006
00:53:04,148 --> 00:53:05,848
- Wow, you actually
just said that.
1007
00:53:05,850 --> 00:53:08,317
- What is so horrible
about having a salad?
1008
00:53:08,319 --> 00:53:09,552
- Nothing, it's fine.
1009
00:53:09,554 --> 00:53:10,686
You know what, don't
eat it, I don't care.
1010
00:53:10,688 --> 00:53:11,620
Watch it melt.
1011
00:53:11,622 --> 00:53:12,454
- Jill.
1012
00:53:12,456 --> 00:53:13,889
(chuckles)
1013
00:53:13,891 --> 00:53:14,757
- Hi.
1014
00:53:14,759 --> 00:53:16,058
- Hi.
1015
00:53:16,060 --> 00:53:17,193
How are you?
1016
00:53:19,730 --> 00:53:20,663
- Pretty good.
1017
00:53:20,665 --> 00:53:22,998
- Yeah, I'd say pretty good.
1018
00:53:23,000 --> 00:53:24,333
- Thank you.
1019
00:53:24,335 --> 00:53:25,701
Thanks.
1020
00:53:25,703 --> 00:53:27,236
- You look great.
1021
00:53:28,673 --> 00:53:29,505
- [Jill] Thank you.
1022
00:53:29,507 --> 00:53:30,839
- You look really good.
1023
00:53:30,841 --> 00:53:32,741
- Carl, this is
my boyfriend Matt.
1024
00:53:32,743 --> 00:53:33,576
- Hi.
1025
00:53:33,578 --> 00:53:34,410
- How you doing?
1026
00:53:34,412 --> 00:53:35,611
- Nice to meet you.
1027
00:53:35,613 --> 00:53:37,513
- So wow, wow.
1028
00:53:37,515 --> 00:53:38,447
- Yeah.
1029
00:53:38,449 --> 00:53:40,249
- We should get together.
1030
00:53:40,251 --> 00:53:42,117
Get some coffee or...
1031
00:53:43,654 --> 00:53:44,486
Something.
1032
00:53:44,488 --> 00:53:45,654
- Possibly, yeah.
1033
00:53:45,656 --> 00:53:46,789
- You got my number?
1034
00:53:46,791 --> 00:53:47,623
- I must.
1035
00:53:47,625 --> 00:53:48,624
- I want you to call me.
1036
00:53:48,626 --> 00:53:49,458
- Okay.
1037
00:53:49,460 --> 00:53:50,292
- Okay?
1038
00:53:50,294 --> 00:53:51,126
- Okay.
1039
00:53:51,128 --> 00:53:53,963
(laughter)
1040
00:53:53,965 --> 00:53:55,197
- Wow, you look great.
1041
00:53:55,199 --> 00:53:57,733
- Thank you, thanks,
I appreciate that.
1042
00:53:57,735 --> 00:53:58,934
- Yeah, okay.
1043
00:53:58,936 --> 00:54:00,970
Nice to meet you, Mark.
1044
00:54:20,358 --> 00:54:21,490
- It's good.
1045
00:54:21,492 --> 00:54:22,891
Good ice cream.
1046
00:54:24,495 --> 00:54:25,461
Happy?
1047
00:54:47,685 --> 00:54:49,118
- [Female Student]
Oh my God, I cannot
1048
00:54:49,120 --> 00:54:50,419
believe that she
looks like that.
1049
00:54:50,421 --> 00:54:51,720
- [Female Student 2]
I know, I really--
1050
00:54:51,722 --> 00:54:52,988
- [Female Student
3] Guys, I'm just
1051
00:54:52,990 --> 00:54:54,423
saying her ass is
the size of Texas.
1052
00:54:54,425 --> 00:54:56,892
- [Female Student] Well
it's the size (mumbles).
1053
00:54:56,894 --> 00:54:59,361
(crosstalk)
1054
00:55:01,265 --> 00:55:02,931
I'm doing this thing where I eat
1055
00:55:02,933 --> 00:55:05,701
cheese and have
a piece of salad.
1056
00:55:05,703 --> 00:55:06,902
Then I run--
1057
00:55:06,904 --> 00:55:08,170
- I just wanna
burn the calories,
1058
00:55:08,172 --> 00:55:09,538
I don't wanna do it,
I don't wanna do it.
1059
00:55:09,540 --> 00:55:10,773
Okay, okay, hold on.
1060
00:55:10,775 --> 00:55:12,408
So what did he say when
you found the condoms,
1061
00:55:12,410 --> 00:55:15,411
or I should say the
dearth of condoms?
1062
00:55:15,413 --> 00:55:16,912
They broke up for three
days and when they got
1063
00:55:16,914 --> 00:55:19,214
back together, four
of them were missing.
1064
00:55:19,216 --> 00:55:20,616
- [Female Student] Woof.
1065
00:55:20,618 --> 00:55:21,750
- [Female Student
3] He said he likes
1066
00:55:21,752 --> 00:55:23,018
to jerk off into them.
1067
00:55:23,020 --> 00:55:24,420
(laughter)
1068
00:55:24,422 --> 00:55:25,621
- [Female Student 2]
Please tell me you did
1069
00:55:25,623 --> 00:55:26,955
not fuck him after
you got back together.
1070
00:55:26,957 --> 00:55:29,825
- I mean I saw him and things...
1071
00:55:29,827 --> 00:55:31,627
- [Female Student 2] All
right, look, we're going
1072
00:55:31,629 --> 00:55:33,262
to a party ad Bel Air's tonight.
1073
00:55:33,264 --> 00:55:34,463
Join us, we'll find you a guy.
1074
00:55:34,465 --> 00:55:35,397
- [Female Student 3] Ben says he
1075
00:55:35,399 --> 00:55:36,932
thinks we can make this work.
1076
00:55:36,934 --> 00:55:38,667
- [Female Student 2] Fuck
that Psion-driving douche.
1077
00:55:38,669 --> 00:55:40,202
You're young and
hot, what the fuck
1078
00:55:40,204 --> 00:55:41,837
do you wanna be tied
down to a guy for?
1079
00:55:41,839 --> 00:55:43,072
This is college.
1080
00:55:43,074 --> 00:55:44,540
- [Female Student
3] I know, I just--
1081
00:55:44,542 --> 00:55:46,842
- [Female Student 2] All right,
you think you love this guy?
1082
00:55:46,844 --> 00:55:48,811
Okay, let's say
he's being honest,
1083
00:55:48,813 --> 00:55:51,013
let's say he's turned
over a new leaf and
1084
00:55:51,015 --> 00:55:53,716
you guys find a way to
make it work or whatever.
1085
00:55:53,718 --> 00:55:55,484
Ask yourself this one question.
1086
00:55:55,486 --> 00:55:56,885
Do you really wanna
go the rest of your
1087
00:55:56,887 --> 00:55:59,588
life wondering if you
could've done better?
1088
00:55:59,590 --> 00:56:02,925
(dramatic piano music)
1089
00:56:21,846 --> 00:56:23,045
- Hey.
1090
00:56:23,047 --> 00:56:24,413
- What's this?
1091
00:56:24,415 --> 00:56:25,881
You made dinner?
1092
00:56:27,651 --> 00:56:28,617
- Yeah.
1093
00:56:29,887 --> 00:56:32,154
It's a special recipe I
picked up at the restaurant.
1094
00:56:32,156 --> 00:56:33,689
I figured it's our
last night here,
1095
00:56:33,691 --> 00:56:35,891
and we've been eating
out all week, so...
1096
00:56:35,893 --> 00:56:38,494
- Uh-huh, and what's in it?
1097
00:56:38,496 --> 00:56:39,728
You know I've been--
1098
00:56:39,730 --> 00:56:41,330
- Well it's gluten
free and dairy free.
1099
00:56:41,332 --> 00:56:43,165
It's all appropriate.
1100
00:56:43,167 --> 00:56:44,466
- All right.
1101
00:56:44,468 --> 00:56:46,001
Let me just take out the trash.
1102
00:56:46,003 --> 00:56:46,835
I got it.
1103
00:56:46,837 --> 00:56:48,036
- I can get it.
1104
00:56:48,038 --> 00:56:49,271
- You made dinner, I'll
take out the trash.
1105
00:56:49,273 --> 00:56:50,072
- Jill, come on,
just let me do it.
1106
00:56:50,074 --> 00:56:51,206
Really, let me do it.
1107
00:56:51,208 --> 00:56:52,441
- No, it's a habit.
1108
00:56:52,443 --> 00:56:53,675
Can you not?
1109
00:56:53,677 --> 00:56:56,311
- It's the least
I can do, come on.
1110
00:56:57,782 --> 00:56:59,047
- Dairy free huh?
1111
00:56:59,049 --> 00:57:00,582
- Here, just let me...
1112
00:57:00,584 --> 00:57:03,385
- What part of "I'm on a
diet" do you not understand?
1113
00:57:03,387 --> 00:57:06,021
Okay, seriously
dude, heavy cream?
1114
00:57:06,023 --> 00:57:07,256
Are you kidding me?
1115
00:57:07,258 --> 00:57:08,490
- [Matt] Those are the
ingredients, that's what
1116
00:57:08,492 --> 00:57:10,626
goes into it, it's
not a big deal.
1117
00:57:10,628 --> 00:57:11,727
- Oh really?
1118
00:57:11,729 --> 00:57:12,795
- [Matt] It's no big deal.
1119
00:57:12,797 --> 00:57:13,862
- No big deal, huh?
1120
00:57:13,864 --> 00:57:15,063
Okay, do you realize this is one
1121
00:57:15,065 --> 00:57:17,166
of the hardest things
I've ever done?
1122
00:57:17,168 --> 00:57:18,767
Do you even realize how--
1123
00:57:18,769 --> 00:57:20,002
- Oh my God, you run around in
1124
00:57:20,004 --> 00:57:21,603
circles once a day,
how hard can that be?
1125
00:57:21,605 --> 00:57:22,571
- What?
1126
00:57:25,443 --> 00:57:28,277
- Hold on, just,
here, just taste it.
1127
00:57:28,279 --> 00:57:29,778
Here, just try it, just try it.
1128
00:57:29,780 --> 00:57:30,913
Just have a taste.
1129
00:57:30,915 --> 00:57:31,847
- Oh my God, no.
1130
00:57:31,849 --> 00:57:32,848
- Please, then we'll talk.
1131
00:57:32,850 --> 00:57:34,116
- Just try it, just taste it!
1132
00:57:34,118 --> 00:57:35,117
- Fuck you!
1133
00:57:35,119 --> 00:57:36,084
Seriously!
1134
00:57:38,422 --> 00:57:40,656
- Fucking eat it, eat it!
1135
00:57:53,737 --> 00:57:55,304
- Jill, hey Jill!
1136
00:57:56,407 --> 00:57:57,372
Jill!
1137
00:58:01,912 --> 00:58:02,878
Jill!
1138
00:58:03,647 --> 00:58:05,047
Jill, Jill, listen!
1139
00:58:05,049 --> 00:58:07,249
- Get out of here, go!
1140
00:58:07,251 --> 00:58:10,719
- Please just tell me
what you want, Jill!
1141
00:58:10,721 --> 00:58:11,954
- What I want?
1142
00:58:11,956 --> 00:58:13,789
You want me to tell
you what I want?
1143
00:58:13,791 --> 00:58:15,157
I want you to get
your ass on a fucking
1144
00:58:15,159 --> 00:58:16,592
plane and go back to
Rhode Island and never
1145
00:58:16,594 --> 00:58:20,462
fucking talk to me again,
that's what I want!
1146
00:58:20,464 --> 00:58:22,731
- You know, you'll
never be one of them.
1147
00:58:22,733 --> 00:58:23,565
- What?
1148
00:58:23,567 --> 00:58:24,766
- You know that right?
1149
00:58:24,768 --> 00:58:27,069
Even if you wanted to be.
1150
00:58:27,071 --> 00:58:29,037
Even if they want you
to be, which they don't.
1151
00:58:29,039 --> 00:58:30,973
- Said the guy
with the glass eye!
1152
00:58:30,975 --> 00:58:34,443
Oh, my bad, sorry,
"plastic acrylic".
1153
00:58:34,445 --> 00:58:35,911
- Hey fuck you!
1154
00:58:35,913 --> 00:58:38,013
- You know what, actually, stop
me if you've heard this one.
1155
00:58:38,015 --> 00:58:39,715
Some bitch walks up
Winston Churchill at a
1156
00:58:39,717 --> 00:58:43,352
party and says Mr.
Churchill, you're drunk.
1157
00:58:43,354 --> 00:58:47,122
To which Churchill replies
yes, but in the morning
1158
00:58:47,124 --> 00:58:50,526
I'll be sober and
you'll still be ugly.
1159
00:58:52,062 --> 00:58:56,298
I keep doing what I'm doing,
and eventually I'll be thin.
1160
00:58:56,300 --> 00:59:00,602
And at the end of the day,
you'll still be deformed.
1161
00:59:02,139 --> 00:59:04,106
It's a great word, isn't it?
1162
00:59:04,108 --> 00:59:05,774
Deformed?
1163
00:59:05,776 --> 00:59:07,242
Such a you word.
1164
00:59:08,612 --> 00:59:11,547
You know, you'll also
still be an idiot
1165
00:59:11,549 --> 00:59:14,383
by the way, I mean wow,
great plan, Patton!
1166
00:59:14,385 --> 00:59:16,618
(laughs) One fatty
meal, 50 pounds
1167
00:59:16,620 --> 00:59:19,187
is gonna leap back on me, wow!
1168
00:59:19,189 --> 00:59:20,656
- You lied to me.
1169
00:59:20,658 --> 00:59:23,325
- I didn't lie to you, I just
didn't tell you about it.
1170
00:59:23,327 --> 00:59:24,726
I wanted it to be a surprise.
1171
00:59:24,728 --> 00:59:26,929
- That's a lie, that's,
what's the word,
1172
00:59:26,931 --> 00:59:29,565
equivocating, which is basically
exactly the same thing!
1173
00:59:29,567 --> 00:59:31,567
- Actually no, it's not
because this doesn't
1174
00:59:31,569 --> 00:59:33,902
negatively impact you
in any way, okay?
1175
00:59:33,904 --> 00:59:35,604
Tell me what's wrong
with what I'm doing.
1176
00:59:35,606 --> 00:59:39,174
- 'Cause you're a
fucking fatass, okay?
1177
00:59:39,176 --> 00:59:41,944
And I like that about you.
1178
00:59:41,946 --> 00:59:43,445
I like that the only
guys I'm competing
1179
00:59:43,447 --> 00:59:45,380
against are elderly
degenerates and
1180
00:59:45,382 --> 00:59:47,482
guys that sickens me
to think of you with,
1181
00:59:47,484 --> 00:59:48,717
but the rest of
the world wouldn't
1182
00:59:48,719 --> 00:59:50,085
touch with a 10
foot pole, and you
1183
00:59:50,087 --> 00:59:51,186
shouldn't be able to change all
1184
00:59:51,188 --> 00:59:53,989
that without fucking telling me!
1185
01:00:00,531 --> 01:00:02,931
- You have a beautiful day.
1186
01:00:11,909 --> 01:00:12,874
- Fuck!
1187
01:00:15,412 --> 01:00:19,381
(dramatic church organ music)
1188
01:00:56,920 --> 01:00:57,786
- Hey.
1189
01:00:57,788 --> 01:00:59,421
- Hey.
1190
01:00:59,423 --> 01:01:02,424
- I'm just looking
for a jump rope.
1191
01:01:03,460 --> 01:01:05,394
- They're over there.
1192
01:01:05,396 --> 01:01:06,628
- Oh, thanks.
1193
01:01:21,612 --> 01:01:23,578
Hey, don't I know you?
1194
01:01:25,849 --> 01:01:29,151
I mean were you a student
at Benjamin Frank High?
1195
01:01:29,153 --> 01:01:31,620
A transfer student or whatever?
1196
01:01:31,622 --> 01:01:32,921
- Yeah, I was.
1197
01:01:34,525 --> 01:01:36,024
- Yeah.
1198
01:01:36,026 --> 01:01:38,927
Yeah, I helped you with
your books that one time.
1199
01:01:38,929 --> 01:01:40,362
You dropped them.
1200
01:01:40,364 --> 01:01:41,463
- Uh-huh.
1201
01:01:41,465 --> 01:01:42,898
- Yeah.
1202
01:01:42,900 --> 01:01:47,035
- After your friends knocked
them out of my hands?
1203
01:01:53,077 --> 01:01:56,211
- So you like working
out down here?
1204
01:01:57,114 --> 01:01:59,314
- It's all right.
1205
01:01:59,316 --> 01:02:00,849
- Yeah.
1206
01:02:00,851 --> 01:02:04,486
I mean it can get pretty busy
upstairs sometimes, you know.
1207
01:02:04,488 --> 01:02:05,887
I've had to wait 10
minutes to get on
1208
01:02:05,889 --> 01:02:08,323
a treadmill before,
it's crazy right?
1209
01:02:08,325 --> 01:02:09,791
- If you say so.
1210
01:02:13,430 --> 01:02:17,566
- Hey, look, I don't know
what your plans are tonight.
1211
01:02:17,568 --> 01:02:18,867
Me and some buddies
were thinking of
1212
01:02:18,869 --> 01:02:21,803
throwing a little party
over the frat house.
1213
01:02:21,805 --> 01:02:23,071
I don't know what you
got going on, but I
1214
01:02:23,073 --> 01:02:26,908
was thinking that maybe
you'd like to join us.
1215
01:02:26,910 --> 01:02:28,243
I mean I know we
don't know each other
1216
01:02:28,245 --> 01:02:29,277
very well or
anything, but it could
1217
01:02:29,279 --> 01:02:32,447
be nice to see a familiar face.
1218
01:02:32,449 --> 01:02:33,648
Hey, wait up.
1219
01:02:38,956 --> 01:02:39,921
Just, hey.
1220
01:02:41,492 --> 01:02:42,457
Hey.
1221
01:02:43,761 --> 01:02:46,828
So which dorm are you in,
O'Malley's, or I mean--
1222
01:02:46,830 --> 01:02:49,431
- Don't fucking touch me!
1223
01:02:49,433 --> 01:02:50,732
Okay, whatever it
is you're doing
1224
01:02:50,734 --> 01:02:52,267
you can just stop right now.
1225
01:02:52,269 --> 01:02:53,735
- I'm not, I don't
know what you're--
1226
01:02:53,737 --> 01:02:55,036
- I don't know what
you're up to, and I don't
1227
01:02:55,038 --> 01:02:57,739
wanna find out, so just
leave me the fuck alone.
1228
01:02:57,741 --> 01:03:01,076
- Okay, what makes you think
that I'm up to anything?
1229
01:03:01,078 --> 01:03:03,044
- Is that a joke?
1230
01:03:03,046 --> 01:03:04,479
- No.
1231
01:03:04,481 --> 01:03:05,714
- Some Abercrombie and
Fitch cover boy just strolls
1232
01:03:05,716 --> 01:03:06,915
up to the chubby
girl doing laps in
1233
01:03:06,917 --> 01:03:09,417
the basement and
asks her on a date?
1234
01:03:09,419 --> 01:03:10,786
Yeah, fuck that shit.
1235
01:03:10,788 --> 01:03:14,589
- Whoa, okay, first of
all, it's not a date.
1236
01:03:15,526 --> 01:03:16,491
I mean...
1237
01:03:19,363 --> 01:03:20,762
Okay, I was just asking if you
1238
01:03:20,764 --> 01:03:22,264
wanted to check out
a really cool party.
1239
01:03:22,266 --> 01:03:23,198
- And I said no.
1240
01:03:23,200 --> 01:03:24,099
- But why?
1241
01:03:24,101 --> 01:03:25,033
I mean--
1242
01:03:25,035 --> 01:03:26,535
- Because I don't want to.
1243
01:03:26,537 --> 01:03:27,702
- That's not an answer though.
1244
01:03:27,704 --> 01:03:29,538
- I don't have to give you one.
1245
01:03:29,540 --> 01:03:30,772
- All right, but
still, don't you
1246
01:03:30,774 --> 01:03:32,741
think it would be the
polite thing to do?
1247
01:03:32,743 --> 01:03:34,009
Just to show a little courtesy
1248
01:03:34,011 --> 01:03:35,477
to a guy who's going
out on a limb here?
1249
01:03:35,479 --> 01:03:37,813
I mean be candor with me and--
1250
01:03:37,815 --> 01:03:40,115
- You want candor, fine.
1251
01:03:40,117 --> 01:03:41,349
You bore me.
1252
01:03:41,351 --> 01:03:42,551
- Okay.
1253
01:03:42,553 --> 01:03:43,752
- From your fucking
pretty boy smile
1254
01:03:43,754 --> 01:03:45,220
to your shoes to your
innermost thoughts
1255
01:03:45,222 --> 01:03:47,489
and feelings, have you
listened to yourself talk?
1256
01:03:47,491 --> 01:03:50,692
"Oh I gotta wait 10 minutes
for a treadmill," come on.
1257
01:03:50,694 --> 01:03:52,027
You know, I guess I just
have better things to
1258
01:03:52,029 --> 01:03:53,829
do on a Friday night
than play beer pong
1259
01:03:53,831 --> 01:03:57,365
with a bunch of date
rapists in training.
1260
01:03:59,503 --> 01:04:00,468
- Wow.
1261
01:04:02,739 --> 01:04:05,941
Yeah, you have got
me all wrong here.
1262
01:04:09,546 --> 01:04:11,413
I'm a nice guy, okay?
1263
01:04:13,717 --> 01:04:15,083
- I don't care.
1264
01:04:19,156 --> 01:04:20,121
- Okay.
1265
01:04:31,702 --> 01:04:34,836
(rhythmic drumming)
1266
01:05:11,441 --> 01:05:14,075
(phone rings)
1267
01:05:16,146 --> 01:05:18,146
- Hey, it's me.
1268
01:05:18,148 --> 01:05:20,916
Yeah, what are
you doing tonight?
1269
01:05:20,918 --> 01:05:22,083
- Is he going out?
1270
01:05:22,085 --> 01:05:24,019
I don't know where he's going.
1271
01:05:24,021 --> 01:05:27,055
I don't know where he's going.
1272
01:05:27,057 --> 01:05:28,857
Where are you going?
1273
01:05:30,560 --> 01:05:32,928
I said where are you going.
1274
01:05:34,598 --> 01:05:36,431
Hello, am I talking
to a brick wall here?
1275
01:05:36,433 --> 01:05:37,265
Say something.
1276
01:05:37,267 --> 01:05:38,099
- Out, okay?
1277
01:05:38,101 --> 01:05:38,934
I'm going out.
1278
01:05:38,936 --> 01:05:40,402
- Where?
1279
01:05:40,404 --> 01:05:42,904
- Elmo's gonna pick me up,
we're just gonna drive around.
1280
01:05:42,906 --> 01:05:45,807
It's not a big deal, okay?
1281
01:05:45,809 --> 01:05:47,275
Have you seen my
wallet anywhere?
1282
01:05:47,277 --> 01:05:48,310
- One second.
1283
01:05:48,312 --> 01:05:49,544
I'll be right back, honey.
1284
01:05:52,916 --> 01:05:54,766
- Huh?
1285
01:05:54,767 --> 01:05:56,617
- I'd rather you
stay home tonight.
1286
01:05:56,620 --> 01:05:58,820
Look, it sucks what
you're going through.
1287
01:05:58,822 --> 01:06:00,055
I know that, I
know it's the worst
1288
01:06:00,057 --> 01:06:01,256
feeling in the
world and anything
1289
01:06:01,258 --> 01:06:02,524
I say is gonna sound
like (mumbles)--
1290
01:06:02,526 --> 01:06:03,892
- Damn it, where's
my fucking wallet?
1291
01:06:03,894 --> 01:06:05,026
- Hey, are you listening to me?
1292
01:06:05,028 --> 01:06:06,494
- Yeah, I'm listening!
1293
01:06:06,496 --> 01:06:07,629
- I'm telling you I think
you should stay home!
1294
01:06:07,631 --> 01:06:08,830
- That was astoundingly
like the advice
1295
01:06:08,832 --> 01:06:09,764
you gave me six
months ago, and look
1296
01:06:09,766 --> 01:06:10,999
where that fucking got me, okay?
1297
01:06:11,001 --> 01:06:12,100
- I'm trying to help you.
1298
01:06:12,102 --> 01:06:13,234
- Help me?
1299
01:06:13,236 --> 01:06:14,602
Are you kidding me?
1300
01:06:14,604 --> 01:06:15,870
You're a single mother looking
1301
01:06:15,872 --> 01:06:17,205
around for her
deadbeat ex-husband
1302
01:06:17,207 --> 01:06:18,506
trying to get child
support, okay,
1303
01:06:18,508 --> 01:06:21,710
so don't help me,
help yourself okay?
1304
01:06:23,246 --> 01:06:24,546
- All right, do what you want.
1305
01:06:24,548 --> 01:06:25,513
I'm done.
1306
01:06:28,185 --> 01:06:29,851
Hey honey.
1307
01:06:29,853 --> 01:06:32,821
(Hunter babbling)
1308
01:06:33,590 --> 01:06:34,422
- Hey.
1309
01:06:34,424 --> 01:06:35,390
- Hey.
1310
01:06:48,305 --> 01:06:49,804
Oh hey, a letter came for you,
1311
01:06:49,806 --> 01:06:51,573
somebody slipped
it under the door.
1312
01:06:51,575 --> 01:06:54,642
It was on the floor
when I came in.
1313
01:07:26,009 --> 01:07:27,609
- [Andy] That one
there, that's him.
1314
01:07:27,611 --> 01:07:28,743
Click on it.
1315
01:07:29,679 --> 01:07:30,879
Nice.
1316
01:07:30,881 --> 01:07:32,113
- [Rachel] He's handsome.
1317
01:07:32,115 --> 01:07:35,483
- He's too handsome,
I wouldn't trust him.
1318
01:07:37,087 --> 01:07:39,587
- See, now why
would you say that?
1319
01:07:39,589 --> 01:07:40,755
- Maybe he's a nice guy.
1320
01:07:40,757 --> 01:07:41,990
- Or maybe he really likes her.
1321
01:07:41,992 --> 01:07:43,258
- Based on what, he
doesn't know her.
1322
01:07:43,260 --> 01:07:45,627
- [Rachel] I don't
know, how should I know?
1323
01:07:45,629 --> 01:07:47,062
I'm just saying it's possible.
1324
01:07:47,064 --> 01:07:48,530
- Yeah, you say it's
possible, and it's usually
1325
01:07:48,532 --> 01:07:51,833
not possible, do you even
know what tonight is?
1326
01:07:51,835 --> 01:07:53,968
- [Jill] What's tonight?
1327
01:07:55,605 --> 01:07:57,338
- It's nothing.
1328
01:07:57,340 --> 01:07:58,273
Never mind.
1329
01:07:58,275 --> 01:08:00,041
- No, tell me, what's tonight?
1330
01:08:00,043 --> 01:08:04,679
- It's nothing, I mean I'm just
saying I wouldn't call him.
1331
01:08:04,681 --> 01:08:06,581
- Is it something...
1332
01:08:06,583 --> 01:08:07,415
- No.
1333
01:08:07,417 --> 01:08:08,683
No, no.
1334
01:08:08,685 --> 01:08:10,118
- [Jill] Why can't you tell me?
1335
01:08:10,120 --> 01:08:13,588
- It's just, it's this
stupid thing fraternities do.
1336
01:08:13,590 --> 01:08:15,890
- All right, well I guess if
it's nothing I can call him.
1337
01:08:15,892 --> 01:08:17,192
- It's just...
1338
01:08:24,101 --> 01:08:28,103
Have you ever heard
of the Cattle Call?
1339
01:08:28,105 --> 01:08:32,340
(dramatic acoustic guitar music)
1340
01:08:55,765 --> 01:08:56,598
- What?
1341
01:08:56,600 --> 01:08:57,665
What, what is it?
1342
01:08:57,667 --> 01:08:58,867
What did I do?
1343
01:08:58,869 --> 01:09:01,102
- I don't know, it's...
1344
01:09:01,104 --> 01:09:02,470
I don't feel like
this is necessary.
1345
01:09:02,472 --> 01:09:04,806
- [Frat Girl] Necessary?
1346
01:09:04,808 --> 01:09:07,008
- Yeah, I mean...
1347
01:09:07,010 --> 01:09:08,977
You're here, I'm here.
1348
01:09:09,779 --> 01:09:10,712
What's the hurry?
1349
01:09:10,714 --> 01:09:12,213
- I'm not in a hurry.
1350
01:09:12,215 --> 01:09:14,549
- Why do you keep doing it?
1351
01:09:14,551 --> 01:09:15,717
I just mean it's like every time
1352
01:09:15,719 --> 01:09:18,386
that we're together
it's always...
1353
01:09:18,388 --> 01:09:20,288
- Because I like you.
1354
01:09:21,391 --> 01:09:23,691
I mean what do you
want me to say?
1355
01:09:23,693 --> 01:09:25,059
- [Patrick] You
don't even know me.
1356
01:09:25,061 --> 01:09:26,094
- [Frat Girl] Yeah I do.
1357
01:09:26,096 --> 01:09:27,228
- Really?
1358
01:09:27,230 --> 01:09:28,863
What do you know about me?
1359
01:09:28,865 --> 01:09:31,099
- Okay, I'm not doing this.
1360
01:09:31,101 --> 01:09:33,067
- Okay, fine, I don't care.
1361
01:09:33,069 --> 01:09:34,402
- You're a fucking asshole.
1362
01:09:34,404 --> 01:09:36,871
- No, no I'm not, okay?
1363
01:09:36,873 --> 01:09:40,875
This is the kind of
shit I'm talking about.
1364
01:09:40,877 --> 01:09:42,410
I read.
1365
01:09:42,412 --> 01:09:44,312
I have thoughts, I...
1366
01:09:46,183 --> 01:09:49,117
I have an imagination, I go to
1367
01:09:49,119 --> 01:09:51,586
places that you don't even know.
1368
01:09:51,588 --> 01:09:53,054
I do things for people.
1369
01:09:53,056 --> 01:09:55,490
- Oh my God, you've gotta
be fucking kidding me.
1370
01:09:55,492 --> 01:09:57,058
- Because I care.
1371
01:09:59,696 --> 01:10:02,197
That's the kind of shit
that I want you to want
1372
01:10:02,199 --> 01:10:06,334
me for, that's what I
want you to know about me.
1373
01:10:10,006 --> 01:10:11,573
I'm a decent guy.
1374
01:10:24,721 --> 01:10:25,687
Wow.
1375
01:10:27,991 --> 01:10:29,057
You look...
1376
01:10:30,093 --> 01:10:31,059
Wow.
1377
01:10:32,829 --> 01:10:34,262
You ready to go?
1378
01:10:36,800 --> 01:10:37,765
Okay.
1379
01:10:39,436 --> 01:10:40,835
- Okay, you're gonna like them,
1380
01:10:40,837 --> 01:10:42,170
they're super cool,
trust me, it's gonna be,
1381
01:10:42,172 --> 01:10:43,638
how much cash do
you have on you?
1382
01:10:43,640 --> 01:10:44,672
- Not a lot, why?
1383
01:10:44,674 --> 01:10:46,174
- Here, just take this.
1384
01:10:46,176 --> 01:10:47,675
Take that.
1385
01:10:47,677 --> 01:10:50,178
All right, the beer is
free, but the liquor costs
1386
01:10:50,180 --> 01:10:51,746
money okay, so when
you offer to buy a girl
1387
01:10:51,748 --> 01:10:54,582
a drink, make sure you
pull out the whole wad.
1388
01:10:54,584 --> 01:10:55,850
Okay, let her see it.
1389
01:10:55,852 --> 01:10:57,151
- Why?
1390
01:10:57,153 --> 01:10:58,620
- So she knows you
have deep pockets.
1391
01:10:58,622 --> 01:11:00,154
- Yeah, but I don't.
1392
01:11:00,156 --> 01:11:02,156
- Right, but she doesn't
even know that, all right?
1393
01:11:02,158 --> 01:11:05,326
They only see what
you want them to see.
1394
01:11:05,328 --> 01:11:08,196
(pop rock music)
1395
01:11:47,937 --> 01:11:49,270
Hey!
1396
01:11:49,272 --> 01:11:52,173
I got someone I
need you to meet!
1397
01:11:54,144 --> 01:11:55,943
Hey, hey, Toni!
1398
01:11:55,945 --> 01:11:59,147
Toni, Toni, this is
Matt, Matt, this is Toni.
1399
01:11:59,149 --> 01:12:02,050
Toni is in my Women's Studies
class and she's insane.
1400
01:12:02,052 --> 01:12:03,284
- Hi.
1401
01:12:03,286 --> 01:12:04,986
- So what's with
the weird outfit?
1402
01:12:04,988 --> 01:12:06,688
- What, what do you mean?
1403
01:12:06,690 --> 01:12:09,490
- Yeah, sorry, I forgot to
tell him about the theme.
1404
01:12:09,492 --> 01:12:10,525
- What?
1405
01:12:10,527 --> 01:12:11,926
What theme?
1406
01:12:11,928 --> 01:12:13,461
- Boys Will Be Girls Night.
1407
01:12:13,463 --> 01:12:14,996
Yeah, I should've told you
man, I'm sorry about that.
1408
01:12:14,998 --> 01:12:16,497
- How come you're
not dressed up?
1409
01:12:16,499 --> 01:12:18,566
- Me, oh, I'm
waiting for someone.
1410
01:12:18,568 --> 01:12:19,400
- Oooo!
1411
01:12:19,402 --> 01:12:20,535
- Shut up, shut up.
1412
01:12:20,537 --> 01:12:22,070
- Who?
1413
01:12:22,072 --> 01:12:24,539
- Just a friend, don't worry
about it, it's gonna be fine.
1414
01:12:24,541 --> 01:12:25,840
- Hey, just...
1415
01:12:26,643 --> 01:12:28,042
Be careful.
1416
01:12:28,044 --> 01:12:30,011
- All right, have fun!
1417
01:12:31,281 --> 01:12:33,081
- Hey, I think there's
some extra boas upstairs.
1418
01:12:33,083 --> 01:12:36,384
Come with me, I'll
get you in uniform.
1419
01:12:36,386 --> 01:12:39,187
(hip hop music)
1420
01:12:42,625 --> 01:12:44,892
- [Frat Boy] 236,
ladies and gentlemen!
1421
01:12:44,894 --> 01:12:48,296
(cheering)
(cowbell rings)
1422
01:12:48,298 --> 01:12:49,597
Who we got next?
1423
01:12:49,599 --> 01:12:51,399
Got you, come on up.
1424
01:12:53,470 --> 01:12:55,536
Aww, sweetie, don't
be a sourpuss.
1425
01:12:55,538 --> 01:12:57,338
All right, who's up?
1426
01:13:02,846 --> 01:13:03,811
195, 195!
1427
01:13:05,148 --> 01:13:07,148
(cheering)
(cowbell rings)
1428
01:13:07,150 --> 01:13:08,483
- Jill?
1429
01:13:10,487 --> 01:13:12,170
- Huh?
1430
01:13:12,171 --> 01:13:13,854
- Do you want a
beer or something?
1431
01:13:13,857 --> 01:13:14,822
- Yeah.
1432
01:13:17,660 --> 01:13:19,394
- What do you want?
1433
01:13:21,030 --> 01:13:22,397
- I don't care.
1434
01:13:24,567 --> 01:13:25,500
- What is it?
1435
01:13:25,502 --> 01:13:27,034
- For you.
1436
01:13:27,036 --> 01:13:28,870
(giggles)
1437
01:13:28,872 --> 01:13:29,837
Let's see.
1438
01:13:31,174 --> 01:13:32,473
- No, that's it.
1439
01:13:32,475 --> 01:13:33,674
No no no.
1440
01:13:33,676 --> 01:13:34,709
No, I don't want
any of that please.
1441
01:13:34,711 --> 01:13:35,643
- Oh yes you do.
1442
01:13:35,645 --> 01:13:36,878
- No, I'm really, I'm all set.
1443
01:13:36,880 --> 01:13:38,246
- Hey, just shut up
and let me do it.
1444
01:13:38,248 --> 01:13:39,547
You will look so good,
you've already got
1445
01:13:39,549 --> 01:13:42,517
that semi-feminine
thing going on anyway.
1446
01:13:42,519 --> 01:13:44,886
High cheek bones, you
have big full lips.
1447
01:13:44,888 --> 01:13:46,287
This will be a cinch.
1448
01:13:46,289 --> 01:13:47,722
- No, I don't want that.
1449
01:13:47,724 --> 01:13:48,990
- Just trust me!
1450
01:13:48,992 --> 01:13:51,726
- Listen to me, I said
I don't wanna do that!
1451
01:13:51,728 --> 01:13:53,361
- All right.
1452
01:13:53,363 --> 01:13:56,063
So what do you want to do then?
1453
01:13:57,133 --> 01:14:00,001
(pop rock music)
1454
01:14:10,046 --> 01:14:11,712
- Hey, Justin.
1455
01:14:11,714 --> 01:14:12,613
You made it, man.
1456
01:14:12,615 --> 01:14:14,248
- Hey there, uh...
1457
01:14:15,151 --> 01:14:15,983
- Elmo.
1458
01:14:15,985 --> 01:14:17,218
- Elmo, Elmo.
1459
01:14:18,254 --> 01:14:20,421
- So did you find
the place okay?
1460
01:14:20,423 --> 01:14:23,424
- Yeah, yeah, it was kinda...
1461
01:14:23,426 --> 01:14:25,593
What kind of party did
you say this was again?
1462
01:14:25,595 --> 01:14:28,996
- Oh, it's like a
stupid costume party.
1463
01:14:30,633 --> 01:14:32,099
Normally I wouldn't
be caught dead
1464
01:14:32,101 --> 01:14:35,236
in a place like
this, too many fags.
1465
01:14:36,806 --> 01:14:39,373
But a boatload of theater
chicks though right?
1466
01:14:39,375 --> 01:14:40,608
Tell you what, why don't I grab
1467
01:14:40,610 --> 01:14:43,444
your coat and get
you some Goose.
1468
01:14:43,446 --> 01:14:45,446
- You know, I think I'm just,
1469
01:14:45,448 --> 01:14:47,648
I think I'm gonna head out.
1470
01:14:47,650 --> 01:14:51,986
This place is just a little
too wild for my tastes.
1471
01:14:51,988 --> 01:14:54,188
- Oh, yeah, no, I get it.
1472
01:14:55,258 --> 01:14:57,258
Tell you what, get you a drink--
1473
01:14:57,260 --> 01:14:58,092
- It's all right.
1474
01:14:58,094 --> 01:14:59,193
- You sure?
1475
01:14:59,195 --> 01:15:00,962
You all right?
- Yeah, I'll just, yeah.
1476
01:15:00,964 --> 01:15:03,130
- Okay, yeah, drive safe.
1477
01:15:11,875 --> 01:15:13,040
Justin!
1478
01:15:13,042 --> 01:15:15,843
(hip hop music)
1479
01:15:20,583 --> 01:15:22,450
- Hey, do you know
where the bathroom is?
1480
01:15:22,452 --> 01:15:23,918
- Oh shit, it's you.
1481
01:15:23,920 --> 01:15:25,419
Patrick Keever huh?
1482
01:15:25,421 --> 01:15:26,621
- What?
1483
01:15:26,623 --> 01:15:28,389
- I heard dude,
he's a fucking stud.
1484
01:15:28,391 --> 01:15:29,524
I'm jealous.
1485
01:15:30,527 --> 01:15:31,993
- Who are you with?
1486
01:15:31,995 --> 01:15:34,228
- Fabio, he's the sexy Latin
dude taking the photos.
1487
01:15:34,230 --> 01:15:35,563
He's got his own
name tattooed on
1488
01:15:35,565 --> 01:15:36,931
his back and he's
already misused the
1489
01:15:36,933 --> 01:15:39,634
word pedantic twice in
conversation tonight.
1490
01:15:39,636 --> 01:15:41,135
But fuck it, he's
on the rowing team
1491
01:15:41,137 --> 01:15:43,838
and he's got biceps
like softballs.
1492
01:15:43,840 --> 01:15:45,439
So who gives a shit right?
1493
01:15:45,441 --> 01:15:47,408
But yeah, Patrick.
1494
01:15:47,410 --> 01:15:48,543
You're a lucky girl.
1495
01:15:48,545 --> 01:15:51,078
Got a fun night ahead of you.
1496
01:15:53,216 --> 01:15:55,983
- Look, I gotta talk
to you about something.
1497
01:15:55,985 --> 01:15:57,818
- Why do they all
wear solid black?
1498
01:15:57,820 --> 01:15:59,887
I mean whatever happened
to vertical stripes right?
1499
01:15:59,889 --> 01:16:02,023
(chuckles)
1500
01:16:02,025 --> 01:16:04,492
- I don't think I can do this.
1501
01:16:04,494 --> 01:16:06,060
- What?
1502
01:16:06,062 --> 01:16:07,862
What are you talking about?
1503
01:16:07,864 --> 01:16:09,630
You're one of my best pledges.
1504
01:16:09,632 --> 01:16:11,098
- Isn't there any other way?
1505
01:16:11,100 --> 01:16:13,100
- You wanna leave, no one's
forcing you to be here.
1506
01:16:13,102 --> 01:16:14,569
- No, I know, it's just--
1507
01:16:14,571 --> 01:16:16,237
- More importantly, no one's
forcing her to be here.
1508
01:16:16,239 --> 01:16:18,306
She's not stupid, she
knows what's going on.
1509
01:16:18,308 --> 01:16:20,107
Why do you think she
hasn't stormed out by now?
1510
01:16:20,109 --> 01:16:23,244
Why haven't all of
them stormed out?
1511
01:16:25,281 --> 01:16:26,814
- I don't know.
1512
01:16:26,816 --> 01:16:29,951
- Because they wanna fuck a
bunch of good looking dudes.
1513
01:16:29,953 --> 01:16:31,719
Are we exploiting them?
1514
01:16:31,721 --> 01:16:33,187
Obviously.
1515
01:16:33,189 --> 01:16:35,389
Are they exploiting
us right back?
1516
01:16:35,391 --> 01:16:36,624
You better believe it.
1517
01:16:36,626 --> 01:16:37,592
- Cheers.
1518
01:16:41,164 --> 01:16:43,898
- I'm not gonna fuck you.
1519
01:16:43,900 --> 01:16:45,733
- Wow, that's a relief.
1520
01:16:45,735 --> 01:16:48,903
- I'm just saying,
you're not my type.
1521
01:16:48,905 --> 01:16:51,706
I figured we should get that
out of the way up front.
1522
01:16:51,708 --> 01:16:54,575
- Up front, you mean like
after I pay for your drink?
1523
01:16:54,577 --> 01:16:56,043
- It's nothing personal.
1524
01:16:56,045 --> 01:16:57,678
You're just too...
1525
01:16:58,915 --> 01:17:00,314
Normal.
1526
01:17:00,316 --> 01:17:01,248
- Normal.
1527
01:17:02,518 --> 01:17:03,718
Oh God, okay.
1528
01:17:04,754 --> 01:17:06,821
Of course, of course
that's the reason.
1529
01:17:06,823 --> 01:17:07,788
- What?
1530
01:17:16,199 --> 01:17:17,164
Whoa.
1531
01:17:19,702 --> 01:17:22,336
- You want different,
huh, you want weird?
1532
01:17:22,338 --> 01:17:24,005
There you go, it's all yours.
1533
01:17:24,007 --> 01:17:25,940
You know what, the funny
thing is I actually
1534
01:17:25,942 --> 01:17:27,942
don't disagree with
you, I really don't.
1535
01:17:27,944 --> 01:17:29,410
I don't care what
the fuck you call me.
1536
01:17:29,412 --> 01:17:30,978
I just wish that you
guys, all you guys
1537
01:17:30,980 --> 01:17:33,047
would just get together
and agree on it
1538
01:17:33,049 --> 01:17:35,316
'cause I don't know
what the fuck I am.
1539
01:17:35,318 --> 01:17:38,386
And all these guys,
they seem to know.
1540
01:17:38,388 --> 01:17:39,787
I mean they're here, they put on
1541
01:17:39,789 --> 01:17:41,222
this little uniform,
and the only
1542
01:17:41,224 --> 01:17:42,923
reason I don't have
mine on is because
1543
01:17:42,925 --> 01:17:45,393
this thing doesn't,
it doesn't fit me.
1544
01:17:45,395 --> 01:17:46,627
And if it did, if
there was something
1545
01:17:46,629 --> 01:17:49,930
I could wear or
say or do, then...
1546
01:17:49,932 --> 01:17:53,467
Are you even listening
to me right now?
1547
01:17:53,469 --> 01:17:55,736
I'm saying something to you.
1548
01:17:55,738 --> 01:17:58,172
- Shit, that is so fucking cool.
1549
01:17:58,174 --> 01:17:59,140
- Unbelievable.
1550
01:17:59,142 --> 01:18:00,141
- No, how did it happen?
1551
01:18:00,143 --> 01:18:01,075
You gotta tell me.
1552
01:18:01,077 --> 01:18:02,576
Actually wait, before you start.
1553
01:18:02,578 --> 01:18:03,878
Hey Andy!
1554
01:18:03,880 --> 01:18:05,813
Get over here, you've
gotta see this!
1555
01:18:05,815 --> 01:18:06,781
- 204...
1556
01:18:08,551 --> 01:18:11,152
205, ladies and gentlemen, 205!
1557
01:18:11,154 --> 01:18:14,388
(cheering)
(cowbell rings)
1558
01:18:14,390 --> 01:18:16,123
All right, last up.
1559
01:18:17,627 --> 01:18:19,493
Hey tons of fun, come on.
1560
01:18:19,495 --> 01:18:21,629
Come on sweetie, it'll just
take a second, let's go.
1561
01:18:21,631 --> 01:18:23,831
- Don't fucking touch me.
1562
01:18:25,334 --> 01:18:26,500
- Come on, it's not gonna hurt.
1563
01:18:26,502 --> 01:18:27,334
Just get up.
1564
01:18:27,336 --> 01:18:28,269
- I said I didn't--
1565
01:18:28,271 --> 01:18:29,203
- Just get on the scale.
1566
01:18:29,205 --> 01:18:30,404
- I'm not doing this, I don't--
1567
01:18:30,406 --> 01:18:32,773
- Get your fucking
hands off her!
1568
01:18:32,775 --> 01:18:33,607
You okay?
1569
01:18:33,609 --> 01:18:34,809
- Yeah.
1570
01:18:34,811 --> 01:18:36,077
- Dude, what the
fuck are you doing?
1571
01:18:36,079 --> 01:18:37,578
I was just taking
her on the scale.
1572
01:18:37,580 --> 01:18:39,513
- She doesn't wanna get on the
scale, so do not touch her!
1573
01:18:39,515 --> 01:18:41,248
- She doesn't wanna
get on the scale?
1574
01:18:41,250 --> 01:18:42,883
What are you, her
bodyguard all of a sudden?
1575
01:18:42,885 --> 01:18:44,518
- What's going on?
1576
01:18:45,555 --> 01:18:47,254
- She doesn't wanna
get on the scale.
1577
01:18:47,256 --> 01:18:48,422
- So?
1578
01:18:48,424 --> 01:18:50,491
- So everyone else
has, so she has to now.
1579
01:18:50,493 --> 01:18:52,460
- She doesn't have to do
anything she doesn't wanna do.
1580
01:18:52,462 --> 01:18:54,628
This is supposed to be fun.
1581
01:18:54,630 --> 01:18:55,896
- [Frat Boy] Yeah, but
everyone else has--
1582
01:18:55,898 --> 01:18:57,732
- I don't give a shit
about everyone else.
1583
01:18:57,734 --> 01:19:00,367
Only person I care about is...
1584
01:19:01,137 --> 01:19:01,969
What's your name?
1585
01:19:01,971 --> 01:19:03,437
- Jill.
1586
01:19:03,439 --> 01:19:05,005
- Beautiful name.
1587
01:19:07,076 --> 01:19:08,709
All that's important
is that you have
1588
01:19:08,711 --> 01:19:12,012
a good time, isn't
that right Patrick?
1589
01:19:13,282 --> 01:19:14,248
- Yeah.
1590
01:19:15,284 --> 01:19:16,317
- Upstairs.
1591
01:19:19,822 --> 01:19:21,789
Last door on the left.
1592
01:19:23,025 --> 01:19:24,925
- How did you know I played
basketball back then?
1593
01:19:24,927 --> 01:19:28,095
- Well we went to the
same high school remember?
1594
01:19:28,097 --> 01:19:29,964
- You went to Ben Frank?
1595
01:19:29,966 --> 01:19:30,931
- Yeah.
1596
01:19:34,003 --> 01:19:35,136
Don't you remember
there was that
1597
01:19:35,138 --> 01:19:36,971
one time we were in the hallway,
1598
01:19:36,973 --> 01:19:39,140
I was looking at the
college placement board,
1599
01:19:39,142 --> 01:19:42,176
and you came up and I was like
1600
01:19:42,178 --> 01:19:43,944
hey look, we're going
to the same school
1601
01:19:43,946 --> 01:19:47,248
and you said nice,
I'll see you there.
1602
01:19:51,154 --> 01:19:54,555
(gentle acoustic guitar music)
1603
01:19:54,557 --> 01:19:56,524
You want another beer?
1604
01:20:38,000 --> 01:20:39,300
- No, that...
1605
01:20:39,302 --> 01:20:40,534
- Who is she?
1606
01:20:41,771 --> 01:20:43,904
- She's, we were dating.
1607
01:20:47,043 --> 01:20:50,411
- Were dating, as in
you guys broke up?
1608
01:20:54,083 --> 01:20:55,382
- Not exactly.
1609
01:20:57,587 --> 01:20:58,552
- Right.
1610
01:20:59,488 --> 01:21:00,621
Not exactly.
1611
01:21:03,826 --> 01:21:06,627
How long have you been together?
1612
01:21:07,897 --> 01:21:09,530
- Year and a half.
1613
01:21:10,533 --> 01:21:14,101
We were trying the whole
long distance thing.
1614
01:21:14,103 --> 01:21:15,102
- Oh really?
1615
01:21:15,104 --> 01:21:17,805
How's that working out for you?
1616
01:21:22,078 --> 01:21:23,711
That was another joke.
1617
01:21:23,713 --> 01:21:25,012
- Right, yeah.
1618
01:21:27,316 --> 01:21:30,150
� Hole in the boat
1619
01:21:30,152 --> 01:21:34,221
� And now we can never go home
1620
01:21:35,157 --> 01:21:38,259
� There's a hole in the boat
1621
01:21:38,261 --> 01:21:42,329
� And now we can never go home
1622
01:21:46,936 --> 01:21:48,269
- Oh God.
1623
01:21:48,271 --> 01:21:50,204
- (mumbles).
1624
01:21:50,206 --> 01:21:52,106
I'm such a shitty singer.
1625
01:21:52,108 --> 01:21:53,841
- Oh fuck, were
you even listening?
1626
01:21:53,843 --> 01:21:55,509
Come on man, no, you're good.
- You got a good voice.
1627
01:21:55,511 --> 01:21:57,678
- No, no, shut up, that's wrong.
1628
01:21:57,680 --> 01:21:59,046
- Fuck that, it's true.
1629
01:21:59,048 --> 01:22:01,415
- No man, it's not, I'm
not gonna (mumbles).
1630
01:22:01,417 --> 01:22:02,650
- Oh come on.
1631
01:22:03,586 --> 01:22:05,552
- Watch it, jeez.
1632
01:22:05,554 --> 01:22:06,620
Outta here.
1633
01:22:07,390 --> 01:22:09,790
(laughter)
1634
01:22:26,442 --> 01:22:27,474
Roker, huh?
1635
01:22:28,611 --> 01:22:31,578
You read him yet, he's good.
1636
01:22:31,580 --> 01:22:33,213
He's kinda like...
1637
01:22:34,750 --> 01:22:36,216
What's his name?
1638
01:22:38,487 --> 01:22:39,453
Whatever.
1639
01:22:43,926 --> 01:22:47,127
There was this poet
that my dad knew,
1640
01:22:48,230 --> 01:22:50,664
or knew someone
who, I don't know,
1641
01:22:50,666 --> 01:22:53,901
but this guy, he
was like, not famous
1642
01:22:56,138 --> 01:22:59,707
or anything, he was
just unbearably ugly.
1643
01:23:02,278 --> 01:23:03,510
Like hideous.
1644
01:23:06,916 --> 01:23:10,217
And no woman would
touch him, so he...
1645
01:23:16,892 --> 01:23:18,192
He tried guys.
1646
01:23:25,101 --> 01:23:27,234
No guys would touch him.
1647
01:23:31,907 --> 01:23:34,174
So he tried hookers.
1648
01:23:34,176 --> 01:23:36,377
(laughs)
1649
01:23:47,123 --> 01:23:50,591
But none of them would
touch him either.
1650
01:23:51,427 --> 01:23:53,127
- Take off your pants.
1651
01:23:53,129 --> 01:23:56,296
- Don't you wanna just
wait a little bit?
1652
01:23:56,298 --> 01:23:57,364
- For what?
1653
01:23:59,035 --> 01:24:00,634
- I don't know, just...
1654
01:24:00,636 --> 01:24:03,103
- Just take them off.
1655
01:24:03,105 --> 01:24:06,040
- Okay, just give me a minute.
1656
01:24:06,042 --> 01:24:09,176
- So one day he
went out to a store.
1657
01:24:13,282 --> 01:24:15,649
(cheering)
1658
01:24:16,652 --> 01:24:20,054
He bought one of those
plastic revolvers.
1659
01:24:23,559 --> 01:24:25,726
And he took the
little orange tip off,
1660
01:24:25,728 --> 01:24:29,096
the one that makes
you know it's a toy.
1661
01:24:31,434 --> 01:24:35,135
And he ran out into
traffic just waving it.
1662
01:24:39,241 --> 01:24:41,475
And the police came
out and tackled him
1663
01:24:41,477 --> 01:24:43,110
and threw him on
the hood of the car.
1664
01:24:43,112 --> 01:24:44,845
- Is everything okay?
1665
01:24:44,847 --> 01:24:46,814
- Just a second, okay?
1666
01:24:50,086 --> 01:24:51,718
- I can help with something--
1667
01:24:51,720 --> 01:24:55,289
- No, I just, just
give me a minute okay?
1668
01:25:01,764 --> 01:25:04,231
- He said it felt wonderful.
1669
01:25:06,268 --> 01:25:08,402
Fuck, what was his name?
1670
01:25:12,575 --> 01:25:13,540
Justin?
1671
01:25:16,479 --> 01:25:17,444
Justin?
1672
01:25:18,614 --> 01:25:20,347
Yo dude, you awake?
1673
01:25:23,719 --> 01:25:26,353
- So still too normal to fuck?
1674
01:25:28,557 --> 01:25:29,523
- No.
1675
01:25:30,392 --> 01:25:31,458
Not normal.
1676
01:25:32,962 --> 01:25:33,927
Just...
1677
01:25:36,866 --> 01:25:37,831
Pathetic.
1678
01:25:47,243 --> 01:25:48,208
- Fucker.
1679
01:26:16,539 --> 01:26:17,504
- Hey.
1680
01:26:19,608 --> 01:26:22,242
Have a good night, sweetheart.
1681
01:26:45,367 --> 01:26:49,603
(dramatic electric guitar music)
1682
01:27:50,633 --> 01:27:51,598
- Hey.
1683
01:27:52,601 --> 01:27:54,067
Wait, no no, hey, no, I'm sorry,
1684
01:27:54,069 --> 01:27:55,902
I thought you knew,
I thought, you were
1685
01:27:55,904 --> 01:27:59,506
touching me, I just
thought that you knew.
1686
01:27:59,508 --> 01:28:02,009
Oh God, please don't hate me.
1687
01:28:02,811 --> 01:28:03,844
I love you.
1688
01:28:13,689 --> 01:28:16,390
(phone buzzes)
1689
01:28:23,365 --> 01:28:24,765
- [Jill] Hello?
1690
01:28:26,368 --> 01:28:27,567
What?
1691
01:28:27,569 --> 01:28:31,872
(suspenseful acoustic
guitar music)
1692
01:28:50,192 --> 01:28:51,258
- This way?
1693
01:28:53,228 --> 01:28:56,229
Hi, hey, excuse me,
can you help me?
1694
01:28:56,231 --> 01:28:57,731
Excuse me?
1695
01:28:57,733 --> 01:28:58,699
Shit.
1696
01:28:59,702 --> 01:29:00,667
Excuse me!
1697
01:29:00,669 --> 01:29:01,768
Excuse me!
1698
01:29:01,770 --> 01:29:02,703
- Sir?
1699
01:29:02,705 --> 01:29:03,904
- Hi, I have a friend here,
1700
01:29:03,906 --> 01:29:04,838
can you tell me
where exactly he is?
1701
01:29:04,840 --> 01:29:06,039
- All right, I understand.
1702
01:29:06,041 --> 01:29:07,307
I'll be with you in
just a second, for right
1703
01:29:07,309 --> 01:29:09,609
now though, please stand
behind the yellow line.
1704
01:29:09,611 --> 01:29:10,844
- No no no, you don't
understand, please,
1705
01:29:10,846 --> 01:29:12,446
can you just tell me
which room he's in and--
1706
01:29:12,448 --> 01:29:14,381
- Sir, behind the
yellow line now.
1707
01:29:14,383 --> 01:29:15,315
- Please, just--
1708
01:29:15,317 --> 01:29:16,483
- [Receptionist] I'm so sorry.
1709
01:29:16,485 --> 01:29:17,784
- God, get off the
fucking phone, help me!
1710
01:29:17,786 --> 01:29:19,286
- Security!
1711
01:29:19,288 --> 01:29:21,788
- Okay, okay, okay, no,
it's fine, I'm over here.
1712
01:29:21,790 --> 01:29:22,823
- Just sit.
1713
01:29:27,663 --> 01:29:28,628
- Fuck.
1714
01:29:56,458 --> 01:29:58,725
- [Jill] Elmo Moss?
1715
01:29:58,727 --> 01:30:03,029
- [Receptionist] He's
in critical care,
please take a seat.
1716
01:30:38,333 --> 01:30:39,633
- How are you?
1717
01:30:43,071 --> 01:30:44,971
Did you take a red eye, or how--
1718
01:30:44,973 --> 01:30:49,176
- Look, just do me a favor
and don't talk to me.
1719
01:30:49,178 --> 01:30:51,077
- Do you want me to
sit somewhere else?
1720
01:30:51,079 --> 01:30:52,345
- I don't care.
1721
01:30:52,347 --> 01:30:53,480
- [Matt] You don't
care, or you--
1722
01:30:53,482 --> 01:30:54,314
- Just don't talk to me.
1723
01:30:54,316 --> 01:30:55,148
- Okay.
1724
01:30:55,150 --> 01:30:55,982
- [Jill] Don't talk--
1725
01:30:55,984 --> 01:30:56,950
- Okay.
1726
01:31:33,789 --> 01:31:37,858
(gentle acoustic guitar music)
1727
01:32:15,964 --> 01:32:18,665
(music swells)
1728
01:33:15,924 --> 01:33:19,726
(dramatic orchestral music)
1729
01:33:27,869 --> 01:33:32,072
� Hide me beneath your white sky
1730
01:33:39,281 --> 01:33:43,083
� Write me a freakin' alibi
1731
01:33:50,325 --> 01:33:54,628
� Something like the
Bonnie and Clyde scheme
1732
01:34:00,802 --> 01:34:04,004
� We risk it all
for something better
1733
01:34:04,006 --> 01:34:08,141
� Baby is it ever what it seems
1734
01:34:34,569 --> 01:34:37,404
� My fingertips are freezing
1735
01:34:37,406 --> 01:34:40,273
� But I'll keep on believing
1736
01:34:40,275 --> 01:34:44,411
� You'll feel these hands again
1737
01:34:45,881 --> 01:34:48,748
� But something
warmer's always near
1738
01:34:48,750 --> 01:34:51,551
� Found nothing yet
and I'll always fear
1739
01:34:51,553 --> 01:34:55,422
� This cold world never ends
1740
01:35:20,415 --> 01:35:24,718
� Something about the
way I catch your eye
1741
01:35:31,727 --> 01:35:36,029
� Wait too long
just to make you try
1742
01:35:42,337 --> 01:35:46,639
� I'll wait as long as it
takes To settle the tides
1743
01:35:53,048 --> 01:35:56,416
� You say I gotta get
some sleep tonight
1744
01:35:56,418 --> 01:36:00,720
� Say oh baby if (mumbles)
1745
01:36:04,960 --> 01:36:07,494
� My fingertips are freezing
1746
01:36:07,496 --> 01:36:10,296
� But I'll keep on believing
1747
01:36:10,298 --> 01:36:14,434
� You'll feel these hands again
1748
01:36:16,171 --> 01:36:18,805
� But something
warmer's always near
1749
01:36:18,807 --> 01:36:21,775
� Found nothing yet
and I'll always fear
1750
01:36:21,777 --> 01:36:25,245
� This cold world never
1751
01:36:27,482 --> 01:36:30,116
� My fingertips are freezing
1752
01:36:30,118 --> 01:36:32,986
� But I'll keep on believing
1753
01:36:32,988 --> 01:36:37,123
� You'll feel these hands again
1754
01:36:38,727 --> 01:36:41,494
� But something
warmer's always near
1755
01:36:41,496 --> 01:36:44,297
� Found nothing yet
and I'll always fear
1756
01:36:44,299 --> 01:36:48,201
� This cold would never ends
1757
01:36:50,972 --> 01:36:53,640
� Call me crazy, (mumbles)
1758
01:36:53,642 --> 01:36:56,576
� Come on baby, do your thing
1759
01:36:56,578 --> 01:37:00,880
� Hold me like (mumbles)
151328
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.