Original subtitles

- Hey, what's up, y'all? It's Frankie Qui�ones.

Let's do this.

(upbeat music)

- [Vic] Today, we're giving this comedian

a total transformation.

- Feels crazy already.

- [Vic] They have no idea who or what

they're about to become.

Once they see themselves in the mirror,

they'll have to make up a character on the spot

and then sit down with me for an improvised interview.

This is "Very Important People."

- Oh shit! Holy- (laughing)

Holy shitballs. Homie, what the fuck, bro?

Dude, this shit's crazy!

Look at my rings and shit, what's up, homie?

Y'all see this shit? (laughing)

Hey, I'm a dragon, watch out.

Well, hello. How are you?

I'm a dragon. I like to do a lot of cocaine, huh?

Keeps the fire in my life. (laughing)

(Frankie grunting)

(crew laughing)

Hey, I'm the boss right now!

Hey, I'll fuck you up, homie! You're at the final stage.

Hey. (skilled beatboxing)

(continues beatboxing)

(makes turntable noises)

It's all love. (giggles)

(crew laughing) (Frankie laughing)

(beatboxing)

Yeah, what's up, y'all? (laughing)

(upbeat music)

- Okay, are you ready?

- Yes. - Repeat after me.

Okay.

Ah, a little...

Okay, then, you know, we're gonna put those down.

- Okay. - Repeat after me.

I. - I.

- I need my space and I need you out of my space.

It is a boundary I'm setting.

- I need my space, I need you out of my space.

It is a boundary I'm setting.

- But not to me.

Don't look at me, 'cause you're making it sound

like I'm the one.

You know what I mean?

You're making it sound like you have a problem with me.

- Got it. - And I'm helping you.

- Right. Sorry. - So just don't...

Maybe turn around.

Yeah, perfect, but don't, I can catch you in the mirror,

so maybe a quarter, quarter turn to the corner.

- Yeah.

- Little bit more turn. May I?

And sort of wrong way.

- Oh. - And perfect.

- Mm. - Okay. And I need you.

- And I need you.

- To not make eye contact with me anymore.

- To not make eye contact with me anymore.

- Because I - Because I

- Am a star. - Am a star.

- Okay, I think that was perfect.

- Okay. - Are you feeling better?

Are you feeling confident?

- Great. - [Vic] Okay.

- I'm feeling great. Thank you.

- We all have a story to tell, and sometimes

those stories need to be shared with the world.

Good evening, I'm Vic Michaelis,

back with another edition of

(upbeat music) "Very Important People."

Please. Oh.

(Frankie growling)

- (laughing) Hey, hey, hey.

- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Okay.

Oh, oh, hello.

And yes. Oh, and then I'm up.

And I'll also sort of...

Oh, look at this! Come on, this is fun!

We can be done with that.

Okay, please take a seat. Please introduce yourself.

? Well, I like to flow free, I got a EP ?

? And my homies call me Lil Huffy ?

(pensive music)

- I love that. Okay, well, I mean, that's just incredible.

We are so happy to have you here today.

Your album is called...

- "Love for the People All the People Around Every Town

Every City Let's Get With Me and Do It."

- Yeah, so it's a long title, and there's the cover art.

- I already have an aggressive look, so I want the artwork

to be like, "Hey, like, come kick it," you know?

- Sure, sure. You came out of nowhere.

All of a sudden, one day,

you just sort of appear on the scene taking it by storm.

Where did you come from?

- I came from deep, deep in the mountains.

- Oh. - My grandfather's Radimus,

which a lot of you know, on "Game of Thrones,"

the dragon on there. - [Vic] Of course.

- They depicted after my grandfather.

- Really?

- But I don't wanna live that life, you know?

I wanna live a life of (beatboxing) love.

- Okay.

- [Lil Huffy] You know what I'm saying?

Everybody always treats me like a freak show, you know?

They want me to spit fire. "Oh, you're a dragon. Spit fire."

But I spit fire in a different way.

I spit fire with my bars.

- I was hoping maybe you'd do a little bit

of live performance for us here today.

- You wanna see some of that? Let's get the lights.

(Lil Huffy beatboxes) (slow upbeat music)

? Hey, hey, from Los Angeles to Las Vegas ?

? I'll be kicking it with Vic Michaelis ?

- Okay! (laughing)

(Lil Huffy beatboxes) (slow upbeat music)

? Oh, get 'em out the steeple ?

? We put it down for Very Important People ?

? People ?

Okay. - See.

- Hey, whoa. - We live.

- Oh my God, wow. That was absolutely incredible.

- Off the top of the dome, how they say.

- Can you do that with anything?

- Yeah.

- Let's go with, oh, oh, blue carpet.

? Once a long time ago, when it all started ?

? My dad blew flames on a blue carpet and he killed it ?

? And now he's dead and it made me angry ?

? But now I spread love and people thank me ?

? See, I reversed the path that I was supposed to be on ?

? But now I spray 'em, I freeze 'em up like Freon ?

- Okay. Wow!

- Sorry, I got a little,

I reflected some of my inner child trauma.

Sometimes I get open like that in my bars.

- What about water fountain door hinge?

? That reminds me of another memory from when I was a kid ?

? There was a fountain water door hinge ?

? And my father closed it on me ?

? He said, "you ain't got no fire, I'ma put you out" ?

? Like the franchise of "Spenser: For Hire" ?

? But that's okay because I'm gonna do what I do ?

? They can't take nothing from me no more ?

? 'Cause I'm Lil Huffy and I'm opening doors ?

Ah, fire love.

- Fire love. That was unbelievable.

Hey, I mean, just incredible. - Fuck, fuck. I'm sorry, Vic.

- Don't you apologize.

- I have to wipe this eye too.

- [Vic] Oh. - He cried too.

Will you wipe it? - [Vic] He cried?

- Would you wipe it? (whimpering)

- Is this eye someone you know?

- It's my grandpa.

- So this is the "Game of Thrones" dragon grandpa.

We actually have your beat machine.

Do you mind if we bring that in?

- [Lil Huffy] Yeah, yeah, bring it on in. Bring it on in.

- [Vic] Okay, so this is your beat machine,

and this is really where the magic is made.

- Hey, hey. (beatboxing)

(Lil Huffy beatboxing a complex rhythm)

? Push that, push that button, Vic ?

? (beatboxing) Vic, Vic, Vic, Vic ?

- It's not working.

? Vic, Vic, Vic, ? - It's not working.

- The buttons. ? Vic, Vic. Vic, Vic. ?

- [Vic] Okay.

(beatboxing) Michaelis.

That's your name and shit.

- That is my name!

- [Lil Huffy] I threw that shit in there.

- Incredible. Oh, okay.

- Yeah. - And you're all right?

- Yeah, yeah. - I'm sorry.

- Yo, I attack. - (screams) No, don't! Don't!

- (laughing) It's love, it's love.

- I was wondering if I could ask you

some rapid fire questions.

(gentle music)

What was your first job? - I worked at Taco Bell.

- Doing what there?

- Well, first I wash dishes,

then they found out I could blow fire.

- Sure.

- So I would heat up all the food on the line.

- And how'd that make you feel?

- Like I was just a piece of equipment.

- Sure.

- Well, I got a heart, I got a soul, I let 'em know.

? I never try to lose control ?

? I try to stay focused, locked in ?

? When people tell me Lil Huffy do it again ?

? They want to be my friend until the very end ?

? Earthbound with my sounds ?

? Got 'em spinning like a merry-go-round ?

? Like a prophet, I stay on top of it ?

? With my rings and my bling bling, don't mean nothing ?

? It's what's inside the heart, what's in the soul ?

? I get signals from telephone poles, from satellites ?

? I take a bite, (grunting) ?

? I don't spit fire, I found where it is ?

? I found where my desires lay when I play ?

? And I freestyle on the spot ?

? Like two cups of coffee, keeping it hot, sizzle ?

? But I don't spit fire no more, it's metaphorical ?

? Hey, we hear the hands clap ?

? Hey, Vic, why don't you gimme daps ?

(Vic trills)

Boom, right on my grandpa's eye. (laughing)

- [Vic] Ah, okay.

What is a book or film that left an impact on you?

- "The Notebook," "Garden State."

And don't even bring up,

don't bring that bullshit ass "Jurassic Park"

or fucking that bullshit ass shit.

- I didn't say that. You said that.

- [Lil Huffy] The CGI bullshit.

- I wouldn't bring that up.

We can cut that part.

You were the one that brought up "Jurassic Park-"

- No, hey, come on. What the fuck?

Hey. - [Vic] You just said that.

- I'm serious, you're gonna make-

- I don't know why you'd bring up "Jurassic Park"

if you didn't wanna talk about Jur...

Hey, no, and it's okay.

And we're taking a breath and we're taking a deep breath.

Yeah, let's do a lap.

Honestly, this is a really good way

to sort of cut off some steam.

We do a lap, we walk around, we count to 10.

One, two, three, four, five,

six, seven, eight, nine, 10.

And then we're sitting down

because that is what we do when we're feeling angry.

How about you?

(Lil Huffy vocalizing)

When we're feeling sad, when we're feeling down,

I like my body to turn around.

There's something happened back there.

They're missing some lighting cues. That's okay.

- (beatboxing) Love.

- Oh what? Whoa, whoa.

Okay, why "The Notebook" though.

- Just, you know, everybody wants to be in love

and go through some shit.

- Have you ever been in love?

(emotionally) - Yeah.

- Who?

- She works at the cookie spot.

- Which one? - Can I say it? I don't know.

- I guess we don't need to promote them.

- It's Crumble. - Okay, so-

- Yeah, she knows I like the strawberry shortcake

and I feel like when she looks at me, she's not like, "Ah."

- Scared.

- She don't ever ask me to breathe fire.

She never asked me to touch my spikes, but I wish she would.

- It sounds like not a lot of people are asking you

to breathe fire, except for maybe the employees

at that Taco Bell you were working at.

It seems like you think people

are gonna ask you to breathe fire.

And so, you're building a wall.

It's like we're building a shell all over.

(Lil Huffy cries) Hey, come on.

No need to be shy here.

We're opening up, we're moving on up,

we're opening the door.

? Well, peep, peep. That's what those laps are for ?

That one wasn't great and I apologize.

- You see me. You're right.

- Last question that I ask each and every one of my guests,

what is the meaning of life?

- Oh, that's easy for me.

(Lil Huffy beatboxing)

? Yo, when I spit it about the life ?

? I'ma make sure I do the shit right ?

? Don't creep up on my spikes like that ?

? People to my right and just relax me ?

- Oh, it's me.

? Yeah, and be in my vision ?

? 'Cause I don't know when you're gonna be switching ?

? You might make a decision to start hittin' on me ?

? And I don't like that ?

? Oh shit, there you go ?

? You're quick witted, with the guns ?

? Shaking our booties just for fun ?

? Then we turned around erase the frown ?

? You thought it was a gun ?

? But it's just upside down with love ?

(Lil Huffy beatboxing)

(Vic beatboxing badly)

- Meaning of life is music, is what I got from that.

Lil Huffy, we know that you are promoting your album.

And so, we thought it would be fun to help by

trying to have a viral moment.

So if we could please fly in the wheel.

(gentle music)

So Lil Huff, here's the deal.

We're gonna perform a viral challenge in the hopes

that people will see this and buy your album.

Okay, here we go.

- Lil Huffy going viral. (laughing)

- [Vic] Oh, okay. - [Lil Huffy] Planking.

- [Vic] Okay, and then for me, I guess it'll be like,

well, okay.

Well, this is kind of fun. Okay.

- [Lil Huffy] (groans) Did we do, are we planking?

- And I think we got it! Okay.

That's a viral moment presented by Chompsky's potato chips.

America's tastiest, heartiest, crispiest chip.

Okay, so, and here we go. Okay.

Okay, help.

- Are you okay?

- Up, oh, and I'm great and I'm perfect.

Here we go. And now, I got a shell, look at that.

- [Lil Huffy] Oh look, you got a shell. Hold on, hold on.

- And now, we got two, two shells.

- We're like twins. - And we're like twins. Okay.

- Lil Huffy and Vic, y'all.

- Okay. - Hey, say I got a shell.

- I got a shell.

- I'm safe in my shell. - I'm safe in my shell.

- (beatboxing) In my shell.

? I got a shell and it's clear to see ?

? Why I am you and you are me ?

Okay, so we'll work on it, we'll work on it.

- But you see how much burden it is

to carry the shell around.

- It's heavy. - It's heavy, right?

- It's heavy and I hear that. So you know what?

Let's get a PA to fly out the wheel, so-

- Well, y'all, were going viral.

- [Vic] Yeah.

- Planking! - Okay.

Well, hopefully I don't go viral for yelling

'cause it's taking a long time

to get the wheel out of here.

Okay, sorry. - Wait, what?

Hold up, hold up. It was like seven seconds.

You on some negative shit. - Here he is. Okay.

- Hey. - And thank you.

- No, no. Hey, hold up. - [Vic] Okay.

- Hold on. - Oh, he doesn't wanna stay.

- [Lil Huffy] Hold on. Hey. - Look, he's out of here.

- What's up, man? Lil Huffy, probably see me on my videos.

- [Vic] Okay. - I got bars.

- Lovely.

- One thing I'm allergic to is negative vibes.

- Same.

- I don't fuck with that shit. - Same.

? It's about (beatboxing) love ?

? I don't wanna hear no negative shit ?

? No push and shove, no bossing people around ?

? That puts a frown on my face ?

- Same.

? When I see somebody mean to somebody else ?

? That's a disgrace ?

? I'm about that (beatboxing) love ?

- Love. ? Love ?

? no negative vibes, I'm allergic to that shit ?

? Get off me, get off me ?

- Same, same. ? Get off me negative vibes ?

- When there's a negative vibe I'm like, "Get off my set!

Get off my set, negative." - [Lil Huffy] Hey, hey!

Hold up, that's the negative vibes.

Do they talk to you like that?

- No. - No.

- Are you lying? You're lying.

Because I feel like you're just trying to keep your job

from all these negative vibes.

- [Vic] I don't- - You're angry.

And for what? - [Vic] I don't-

- Look at you, you have a nice blue carpet.

My dad burnt mine. - Right.

- You have a lot to be grateful for, Vic.

- You're right.

- Including him. What's his name?

- My

My PA.

- Mahpeeay. - That's not my name.

- It is...

Your name is, let's say it on the count of three.

One, two, three.

- Ed.

- Wes. - [Vic] Wes.

- My name is Wes. - Wes.

- I guess Ed, but yeah, it's Wes.

- [Vic] His name is Wes.

- Wes is the best. He's appreciated.

? Wes is the best, he's appreciated ?

? My PA, my PA, Wes, Wes ?

? He's appreciated ?

? Appreciated ?

? My PA, my PA, Wes, Wes ?

? He's appreciated ?

? My PA, my PA, Wes, Wes, appreciated ?

? Appreciated ? ? My PA, Wes, Wes ?

? Appreciated ?

? Appreciated ? ? My PA, Wes, Wes ?

? Appreciated ?

? Appreciated ? ? My PA, Wes, Wes ?

? And hey, now, I'm not porous ?

? Here comes Vic with the chorus ?

? Mm, okay, and this ?

? Heartbreak feels good in a place like this ?

? We're hanging out and we're having fun ?

? Three friends, wow ?

? There's one, me, and I'm here 'cause I'm the host ?

? And everybody thinks I'm the most ?

? Wonderful host in the world ?

? And that's why I'm here from Hungary to California ?

(music fades)

Right? Oh, okay.

We're getting outta here, so-

- Hey, hey, buy my new EP, y'all,

dropping next month, Lil Huffy.

(beatboxing) Love.

(Lil Huffy beatboxing)

- Love. It's all, it's all love.

Okay. (door thuds)

(door thudding) (doorknob clicking)

Locked.

(pensive music)

I'm Vic Michaelis reminding you to be true to yourself

unless you'd rather be somebody else.

Goodnight.

(door thudding) Very funny, guys.

(doorknob clicking)

Not gonna use the door. I'll go around.

Okay, and the lights are off. That's very funny, everyone.

Guys, guys. Went out the back door.

That's fun, that's fun. I'll catch up with them later.

(phone beeps)

Cody, hello, it's Vic Michaelis,

host of "Very Important People."

And I am calling to inform you, you are the winner

of the Chompsky's Heartiest Heart to Heart contest.

And so, I'm here to give you a piece of advice.

And that advice is follow your dreams

unless it's to be a talk show host, it's too crowded.

You should do what you're doing.

Don't try and encroach on anybody else's territory.

You know what I'm saying? It's rude.

And I just simply think you should

sort of stay in your lane.

My advice is stay in your lane.

And this is crazy that you would call me for advice.

I'm so what?

I'm successful and all of a sudden

everybody wants a piece of me.

So you know what, Cody, go fuck yourself.

(phone beeps)

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