Original subtitles

Now, billy, I sure hate to do this.

I believe in givin' folks a chance.

But you leave me no alternative,

'less you apologize to my lovely bride...

Clarence! You still in the back?

Be right with you, miss millie.

No hurry, just wonderin' if you'd left.

I accept your apology, billy.

Now, I will let you go, this time.

You got time to run a quick mop over this floor, too?

Sure I do, miss millie, I better put some fresh water in the

Bucket first, before I get more dirt on the floor

Than I take off.

Fine.

Don't tell me you're starting to wear a gun?

Shucks no, miss millie. I get 25 cents for cleanin' 'em,

An' I just wear 'em, 'til folks pick 'em up.

Oh, well, I'm mighty glad of that. Be pretty silly for

Clarence bibs to start carryin' a gun.

Sure would be silly. Imagine that, a mop boy, wearin' a gun.

Longden.

Don't crack a smile at those fancy clothes he wears

Be your last one.

I'd sooner rile a rattlesnake.

I... I didn't mean it, mister.

I sure didn't mean to throw that water on you.

Now, mister, I wouldn't do that.

See anythin'?

Clarence, the mop boy, killin' pretty man longden?

Clarence?

Clarence, how'd this get started?

Well, mr. Mccain, now, I was just comin' out with this bucket

See, an' I've been wearin' this gun belt. I've been cleanin'

This gun, see. It's a- one of these triggerless fannin' jobs-

Now, just not thinkin', he's shot.

He's shot and then some.

George tanner sure gonna ride in when he hears about the killin'.

Now it's too bad that clarence don't wear a gun.

We'd have ourselves a show today.

With the marshal outta town,

Maybe we can get ourselves a show.

That's when I threw the slop water, and I...

I seen the whole thing, mr. Mccain. Clarence, just beat 'im

To the trigger pull.

'bout the fastest holster snapshot, I've ever seen.

Well, I wouldn't say that, I...

It seems to me, clarence, here has been doin' some

Practicin' on the side, with those guns he's been cleanin',

Eh, clarence?

Reade, what are you tryin' to pull?

Oh, I'm just givin' credit, where credit's due, mr. Mccain.

Hey, wicks? Get longden's gun.

As a gun fight winner, he's got certain rights. Well, I guess

Clarence here has got a right to that fancy gun o' longden's,

Huh? Oh, I'll leave it up to you, mr. Mccain, since you're

Takin' marshal micah's place today. Clarence's got a right to

Longden's gun or don't he?

All right, reade, I never heard you open your mouth except to

Bum a drink or use somebody's misfortune.

Now, why don't you just keep out of this?

I'm just protectin' clarence's rights.

Protectin' the right of the fastest gun

North fork's ever seen.

Well, I'm getting' more credit-

There it is. Couldn't be worn by a better man, clarence.

I'm glad to call you my friend.

Clarence, you don't know anythin' about guns,

Why don't you take it off?

I know all about guns, mr. Mccain. I mean, I've been

Practicin', you know, fast draw,

Kinda make believe, with the guns I get to clean.

I knew it.

I knew he'd been practicin' his slick draw for years.

Come on, clarence, we'll buy

You a drink, an' you'll tell us all about it.

Let's go, clarence.

He shouldn't be wearin' that gun, but he looked so proud,

I didn't have the heart to take it away from him.

What are those two loafers up to, lucas?

Well, I'm tryin' to decide whether they are just leadin'

Clarence along for the drinks he can buy them, or if...

If they're settin' 'im up for george tanner.

George tanner?

Longden's partner. He's over at slag creek. He's bound to

Come ridin' in here sooner, or later.

Lookin' for clarence?

No, I don't think so. When tanner finds out it was an

Accident, he'd be pretty stupid to go lookin' for trouble.

And I'm sure clarence, doesn't want any.

I better get back to work.

Hello, son. How was school today?

Oh, same as usual, waitin' to get out.

Somethin' happened in town?

An accidental shootin', man named longden.

George tanner's partner?

Well, from the last grade you brought home on current events,

I would have never guessed you were so well informed.

Everybody in school was talkin' about george tanner

Being so near by, over in slag creek. You know he used to ride

With billy the kid? Saved wyatt earp's life.

And in one day, he shot four outlaws that were tryin' to-

Mark, micah sent word he'd be late. So I guess tonight

You're gonna be bunk mates with bobby hamilton.

Oh, that's great! Bobby's good in arithmetic.

But you're not. So you'll

Do your homework alone, in micah's office.

Oh, now, pa, who said bobby

Was gonna help me with my homework?

You did.

I was your age once, son.

You'd never know it.

Oh.

Come on, second one goes down easier, slides like-

Two or three'll give you

A steadier hand when george tanner comes to town.

George tanner?

Yeah, longden's gun partner.

Oh, george tanner, I heard o' him.

I'm bettin' folks are gonna change their mind about you

When you take tanner on. Folks are sayin' your killin'

Longden was an accident.

George tanner? Well, guess

It's gonna be either him or me, eh, boys?

Yeah, my money is on you, clarence.

When that george tanner

Comes into town, I'm gonna chase him right out o' here!

Come on, drink up now. Sure sad we didn't bring our money

With us, but the next time the drinks are on us.

Well, I better not have any more, boys. I wanna have a

Steady hand, when I face this george tanner. But you boys

Go ahead, I've got two more whole dollars

-Right here in my pocket. -Well, all right.

Clarence: Here we are.

Oh, yeah.

Well, rushin' things a bit, aren't you, son?

Well, by the time I grow up, everythin' will be all over.

Outlaws, renegade indians, be nothing excitin' left to do.

That's what I felt when I was a boy. The past seems more

Excitin'. But when you're a full grown man, you'll see there's

Still lots of things to do.

Railroads to be built, cities, bridges.

I'd rather hunt buffalo.

Oh, some things do pass, includin' mark mccain,

If he studies his homework.

Well, here's the way it happened, gentlemen.

I knew he was gonna be riled, when that water hit 'im, see.

An' I knew that I didn't have time to draw

An' take careful aim.

Son, tell mrs. Hamilton that I'll try get an' get over

For supper, if micah get's back on time.

All right.

Sorry to disturb you, I was lookin' for some information.

The name's tanner, george tanner.

The gunfighter!

Well, it's mostly gun totin' son. And mostly in the

Hire o' folks who need some law where there isn't any real law.

It's a dyin' profession.

Oh, li...Like buffalo huntin'.

Yeah, like buffalo huntin'.

Uh, bye.

Bye.

Are you the marshal?

No, I'm lucas mccain. The marshal's over at burtonville,

Testifyin' at a trial. I'm, uh, watchin' the store.

This, er, shootin' you had here today, er, pretty well

Straightened out?

Mr. Tanner, that shootin' was completely accidental.

That's good enough for me.

Well, you just took a load off my mind.

Mr. Mccain, I'm too old a hand to engage in theatrics.

I rode with longden, we worked

As a team. But if the law's satisfied it wasn't murder,

I'm satisfied, I owe 'im nothin'.

Well, the man who shot longden, clarence bibs,

He handles a mop better than he does a gun. Odd cleanin' jobs

Around town. Some stores, the saloon. He was throwin' out

A dirty pail of wash water, and it hit longden. Longden drew his

Gun, clarence stumbled back,

He fell an' h- his gun went off accidentally.

-That's how it was? -That's how it was.

They never know who or when.

Is there such a thing as cold beer in north fork?

Right across the way.

Join me?

Now, I'll be glad too if you let me buy. Ah, mr. Tanner,

This clarence bibs, he's a harmless fella. Matter of fact,

He'd give you the shirt off his back. But right now, he's, well

He's kind of enjoyin' the limelight.

Town hero.

Saloon hero is more like it.

He's over there now.

Clarence's baskin' in the limelight, doesn't bother me

One bit. What does bother me is goin' without that cold

Beer because somebody in that saloon might ruffle my feathers.

Well, then, let's go wet down that road dust you picked up.

I just- well it's kinda hard

To explain, but you get off a much faster shot that way.

Maybe you'll get a chance

To show us, clarence, when george tanner gets here.

Yeah, maybe get to show

George tanner, too. Learn 'im a thing or two.

Well, I'm not sayin' I don't feel a mite sorry for

That mr. Tanner. Longden might have been a good friend of his,

Nobody don't like to lose a good friend.

Hanson, two beers please.

That's an insult if I ever saw one. Just walks in an' makes

Out like he don't even see you.

Who don't see me?

That's him, tanner. Sizin' you up.

Anybody looked at me like that, I'd do somethin' fast.

Don't look like much to me, not much at all!

I take it your name is george tanner.

And I have the pleasure of talkin' to clarence bibs.

You heard about me?

From mr. Mccain.

I even let longden draw first.

Mr. Bibs, men like longden are destined for a short life.

If it hadn't been you, it would have been someone else.

It don't rile you that your partner is dead?

It was a fair fight, wasn't it?

Mr. Tanner, there ain't enough room in this town

For both of us.

Clarence-

It's all right. Just what was

The point you were goin' to make?

I mean, I'm tellin' you to get outta town right now.

And if I don't get outta town, now?

Well, I guess we got some

More grave room alongside longden.

Would you, er, be courteous

Enough to let me finish my beer?

I want you to get outta town now, right now.

Clarence? Count your blessings.

Well, I gotta hand it to you,

Clarence, the way you hold your temper in the face of insult.

You sure showed a lot of self control.

Chased him out. Chased him right out.

He's out there jawin' with mccain. An' after you told 'im

To get right o' town.

Be all over town. Tanner, an'

Lucas mccain treatin' clarence like a mop boy.

Been a pleasure, mr. Mccain.

Ever ride by again, stop out at my ranch. Won't say my

Cooking's the best, but mark an' I get by on it.

I'd like that. I'm glad I

Stopped by to see you before I went to that saloon.

Bye.

Tanner!

My friend had been gunned down,

I wouldn't turn tail and run outta town!

Mr. Bibs, a word of advice,

Sell that gun for what it'll bring, an' go back to your mop.

You'll lead a far happier life, and a fuller one.

Lucas: Clarence!

Hey, clarence? You can do better than one mop for that fancy gun.

Get a dozen, at least.

What'd you tell him about me, mr. Mccain?

The truth, that longden's death was accidental.

That I was only a mop boy.

Clarence, you're no gun hand,

You never fired a gun in your life.

Who asked you to interfere?

Well, if I didn't, you would have been facin' tanner's gun.

Now, wake up, clarence. He could have emptied his gun into you,

Before you cleared your holster.

I think it's time that you,

Came down to earth. Time that you stopped wearin' that gun.

Time to be a mop boy again!

Time to laugh at people jokin' me! Time to laugh out loud,

Cuz if I don't, I'll bust out cryin'!

Mr. Mccain!

I'm drawin' on you.

I wouldn't advise that, clarence.

I'm not askin' for advice, I'm tellin' you, I'm drawin' on

You, an' I expect you to be ready!

Clarence: Are you ready, mr. Mccain?

Don't do it, clarence.

Clarence: I'm ready, mr. Mccain!

What's the matter, clarence?

Gun too heavy?

Heavier than a mop handle?

Maybe it's a good thing you couldn't draw it, clarence.

You might have blowed your toes off

With that famous fast holster snapshot you got.

You'd sure be a sight.

Hobblin' around on one foot, moppin' a floor.

Say, clarence, come on, I see

You're real disappointed. Let's you an' us play draw, huh?

Shoulder shots, clarence.

Draw an' nick.

Are you ready, clarence?

You've been lookin' for a fight.

We sure don't wanna disappoint you.

Aren't you, boys, takin' quite a chance?

Nobody's askin' you to interfere, mr. Mccain.

We're just playin' a little draw an' nick.

Hmm, you sure have confidence. More than I had

When clarence said he was gonna draw. You notice I never did

Give 'im a chance to get his hand near that holster. You see,

With all the years of make believe drawin' clarence has

Done, I gotta sneakin' hunch,

He's more of an expert, than we give him credit for.

Who's leg are you pullin', mccain?

No, I just been wonderin' about clarence. Shootin' that

Straight when longden drew his gun.

His killin' longden was accident, I saw it.

Accident or trick shootin'?

Now, don't forget, it's a game, clarence. No shootin' to kill.

I'm ready, I'm sure enough ready!

You know, george tanner's a smart man, he never gambles.

But then I guess you fellas got

More sportin' blood than he has, huh?

Guess it's only fair, for you boys to draw first. I sure don't

Wanna take no mean advantage with my slick draw practicin.'

It...It don't seem right,

Clarence, us facin' you like this after drinkin' your liquor.

Oh, that's all right, boys. I sure don't wanna disappoint

Anybody that wants to draw against me.

Lucas: Watch his eyes, boys.

When they narrow, that's when his hand starts movin'.

You sure take things serious, clarence.

Can't you tell... We was only... Spoofin'?

Mr. Mccain, I've been thinkin',

Maybe this fancy gun oughta be sold for proper burial money

For longden. Maybe for a fancy

Headstone, like the clothes he liked to wear.

I'll take care of it for you, clarence.

Mr. Mccain, I want you to know that, all the time I was in

That saloon, I was only thinkin' about one thing,

How tomorrow I'll be a mop boy again, an' people'll be lookin'

At me without seein' me.

If george tanner killed me, I'd be somebody. Even dead.

Well, I'm glad you feel different about it now. So how

About joinin' me for a drink,

A... Cup o' coffee, in micah's office?

Sure glad you don't wanna drink anythin' stronger than

Coffee, mr. Mccain. Redeye whiskey an' me don't agree.

Come on.

About mr. Tanner, pa. Says here

He killed his first man when he was only 12 years old.

Whether he did or not, mark, I don't know. He's a very famous

Man, that's true. But he's also an unhappy one. He'd trade

Everythin', his reputation, his ability with a gun, everythin'

He has, if he could change places with clarence.

Or for that matter, with you.

Well, I'd sure like to trade places with him.

I guess most boys would.

Think he'll ever come back to north fork?

That's hard to say, son.

Sure hope he does.

Any particular reason?

Oh, I don' know, he just

Makes me think of buffalo an' prairie wagons, indians.

Mark, your dreams will supply all the buffalo, prairie

Wagons, an' indians you'll ever need.

How did you know I dream about those things?

Son, you keep forgettin' I used to be your age.

Yeah, I guess that doesn't seem too long ago to you, huh?

Only yesterday, mark, only yesterday.