Original subtitles

♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪

♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪

♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪

♪ The weekend comes, my cycle hums ♪

♪ Ready to race to you ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪ - ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪ - ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ Good-bye, gray sky, hello, blue ♪

♪ There's nothing can hold me when I hold you ♪

♪ It feels so right it can't be wrong ♪

♪ Rocking and rolling all week long ♪

♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪

♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪

♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪

♪ Saturday, what a day ♪

♪ Groovin' all week with you ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪ - ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪ - ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ These happy days are yours and mine ♪

♪ These happy days are yours ♪

♪ And mine, Happy Days! ♪

Happy Days is filmed before a studio audience.

Professor Garrity, I wanted to talk to you

about my grade, but I'll come back later.

Hold it, Cunningham!

Now, why are you here?

Well, sir, uh,

about my grade on my last assignment.

This is my first college journalism course,

and you gave me a "D."

Now, I have never complained about a grade before,

but I-I just honestly felt

that it deserved better than a "D."

Is that a fact?

Well, I suggest you read it over again.

Well, I did.

It's got who, what, why, where, when and how.

It's got all the information in the first paragraph.

It-it's well-written, and I just think that it

- deserves a little better. I... - Let me see that.

Oh, yeah, I remember.

Yeah, colorful, good sentence structure.

Then why did it get a "D"?

What's the name of this course?

The name, uh, Investigative Reporting 101.

That's right.

Investigative Reporting.

Cunningham, this story deals

with a stoplight that has been burned out for over a month.

Right, right.

It's a good subject.

It hasn't been fixed; people have been late to work.

There have been traffic jams. A city with no heart.

Uh-huh, where's a quote from the traffic commissioner?

- Well, uh, I tried... - What do the people

in the neighborhood think?

- The people, they... - How about the police

who cover the area?

- The police... - The school guard?

How about a motorist who's had a close call?

How about my colorful description

of the light itself?

Now, what's wrong with...

"The fiery red glow,

"which once flashed like a one-eyed giant,

now stands like a lonely, silent sentinel."

Who cares about one-eyed giants?

Investigative reporting!

If you want to write about one-eyed giants,

write for television.

Oh, well, I see your point.

Congratulations.

I guess I didn't dig enough.

That's right, Cunningham.

Dig, dig, dig!

- Dig... - Right.

Get down in the muck and wallow, hunt,

root around, ferret out.

You don't do it this time, Cunningham,

you get another "D."

A "D." A "D" in journalism.

It's embarrassing.

A "D" in my chosen field.

I-I think I should just forget it,

go to work for Dad at his hardware store.

I mean, I know nuts and bolts

and shingles and hacksaws and things. I can do that.

Oh, now, Richard, you're talking silly.

Professor Garrity is an old fuddy-duddy.

That's not what you said about my Spanish teacher

when I got a "D."

That was different.

You deserved that,

telling him that hasta la vista

means "sit on it."

Nobody understands my sense of humor.

Oh, boy, I got a "D."

How am I supposed to tell Dad that I got a "D"

when he's spending all this money on going to college?

Don't worry.

We're gonna help you find something

to investigate right here.

You're gonna show that old codger

what reporting is all about.

Yeah. Here's something for you to investigate, Rich.

Oh, what?

It says here that Desi and Lucy

bought a home in Beverly Hills.

Well, that's interesting.

I wonder where Fred and Ethel Mertz will live.

Mom, you're not helping me.

Here, give me a section of this. I'll...

I've got it.

I'll borrow Jenny Piccalo's diary.

She's got great stories.

She has four pages about the time

she got stuck in the tunnel of love.

I'm gonna call her; this is great, this is great.

No, no good.

Yellow journalism.

Good evening, dear.

How was your day?

I had a lousy day, thank you, Marion.

Better tell him about the "D" later.

Oh, I'm sorry about your day, dear, but cheer up.

I have a pot roast for dinner.

Now, does that make you feel better?

No.

With little carrots in the gravy?

Yes.

Well, it's a start.

Oh, what's the trouble, dear?

Are your feather dusters molting again?

No, Marion.

It's the garbagemen.

They are demanding a surcharge.

A surcharge?

How dare they.

What exactly is that?

I'll tell you what it is, Marion.

They are demanding extra money every week

to pick up the trash.

Now, Richard, they call that a surcharge.

You know what I call it? Bullying me!

- Extortion! - Extortion?

Well, you know what they say, dear.

You can't fight city hall.

Fight city hall.

City hall.

This may be it; this may be my story.

He wants me to dig.

Well, what's better to dig in than garbage?

Oh, boy.

I'm really cooking now.

I'm cooking with gas.

What is he talking about?

I'm Scoop Cunningham, Dad.

I got an important story, and you can really help me.

All right, now, uh,

who told you about this so-called surcharge?

The regular garbagemen.

Yeah, uh, what are their names?

Names?

I don't know their names.

Well, what do you call them?

Well, they're trying to get money out of me, Marion!

I call them crooks!

Well, is there anything you can tell me about them?

Well, what's to tell?

They pick up my trashcans,

they throw the trash into the trucks,

and then they run over my lids.

What a story.

Running over lids?

Richard, what is the matter with you?

Dad, I got a "D" on my journalism assignment,

but don't worry, that's not gonna happen again.

This is gonna be a great story, Dad.

He got a "D."

Only Joanie gets "D" s.

I got a "D."

♪ Ready, ready, ready, 'cause tonight's the night ♪

♪ I came here to rock and roll ♪

♪ I said I came here to rock and roll... ♪

Boy, this college stuff is hard.

You think you got troubles.

I'm doing so bad in ROTC,

they're talking firing squad.

They won't do that.

In the Navy, they walk the plank.

Good one, Malph.

I still got it.

Every year, I get better.

Hey, Pots, I missed some of the biology notes.

- Can I see yours? - Yeah.

I think I missed a few, too,

- but I'll read you what I got here. - Okay.

"The digestive system of the earthworm is..."

That's it?

Yeah, that's when Linda Shanley crossed her legs.

Hmm.

Come on, let's go find somebody we can get the notes from.

Okay.

- Hey, Rich. -Hey, Rich. - Hi, guys.

Oh, Rich, we missed some of the biology notes.

I have no time for kid stuff.

I've got big business over here.

He didn't get them, either.

Right. Let's go find Linda Shanley.

What if she doesn't have the notes?

We'll look at her legs!

Is that right?

Al, Al, please, I have to have the phone.

I'm waiting for an important call

from the Department of Sanitation.

I've got to have it.

But this is it; it's Mrs. Miller.

- Mrs. Miller... - She belongs to my parish.

Yeah, Mrs. Miller,

did you know I have a brother that's a priest?

- Uh-huh. - Al, Al, please.

- Well, look, I got to go right now. - Al, please.

Here's Richard Cunningham right now.

Boy, could you believe? Small world.

Yeah.

Hello. Yes.

Yes, this is Richie Cunningham.

Yeah, oh, well, now...

Oh, yeah, yeah, Al is a nice guy.

Right, now, about the commissioner.

Well, look, I know the commissioner

doesn't want to talk to me, but, Mrs. Miller...

Mrs. Miller, please, I would just like to talk to you.

Please, if you can't set up an appointment...

Please, Mrs. Miller, all right.

Let me take you out to dinner, lunch, anything.

I just... I just have to talk to you.

Mrs. Miller, ple...

She hung up.

As well she should.

You don't fool around with married women.

I find that personally disgraceful.

Oh, no, that's-that's not a married woman, Fonz.

- Uh-huh. - Well, yeah, she is married,

but she's from Al's parish, and she...

Well, look, don't worry about her, Fonz.

Look, I'm doing this exposé on the Sanitation Department.

Now, I've got some very good leads,

but I just can't get anybody to confirm anything.

Oh, I get it. What you need is,

uh, to know somebody down at city hall.

That's what I need!

No, what you need is to let my arm go.

Oh, I'm sorry.

But, uh, do you know anybody down at city hall?

Let's see, city hall, yeah, there's, uh...

Cecilia, Belvy, uh, Marilyn.

- Uh, Fonz, uh... - Yeah, there's, uh,

- would you step over here? - Lorraine,

- Bunny, - Not so loud, Fonz.

- Sharon, Ellen. - That's gonna be plenty.

Boy, it's great to know somebody with friends

- in the right places. - Yeah.

Sally, Rachel...

Fonz, I need somebody on the inside.

Marsha.

I need somebody in the know with all the info.

I am gonna rip the lid off city hall, Fonz.

Rip, rip, rip.

I get your drift.

Rip.

What you need is a chatty garbageman.

Right.

Let's find one and chat.

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.

This takes time.

Yes, but the assignment is due tomorrow morning.

I'll see what I can do.

This is great.

I could blow in a chick's ear without ever moving my head.

Yeah.

Come on, we'll be late for school

- and miss Parents Night. - We're coming, we're coming.

I'm so glad Lori Beth came by.

Richard needs something to help him

get his mind off this garbage business.

You want me to get Jenny Piccalo to try?

That's enough, young lady. Out.

Out.

You know her teacher's gonna tell us she's got a fresh mouth.

Richie?

Yeah, Lori Beth?

Aren't you glad I came over

to study with you, Rich?

Oh, oh, yeah.

Yeah, I really am. Yes.

Well, here we are, all alone in the house.

Hmm.

You want to play some records?

Hmm.

Romantic records?

Records!

Records, that's it!

If I can get hold of the Sanitation Department records,

I think I could really nail those guys.

Do you know what it's like

playing second fiddle to garbage?

I'm sorry, Lori Beth,

but, you see, even though this is just a class assignment,

if it's a good story,

Professor Garrity might put it in the school paper.

And if it's a really good investigative reporting job,

it might even go in the... in the Milwaukee Journal.

Wonder who that could be.

I thought we were gonna be alone.

Is this the Cunningham house?

Yeah, it is.

Here's a present for your old man.

It's from his friends at the Sanitation Department.

Okay, bucko, the joke's over.

You tell your old man the joke is gonna be on him

unless he calls off the snoops.

You're the snoops.

Yeah.

That man hurt me with his finger.

Aw!

Well, that's the best we can do.

I'll shampoo the rug in the morning.

What a mess. What a terrible thing.

- Dad? - Hmm?

Look, I didn't want to worry Mom.

But they left you a note.

Oh?

On this.

"Cunningham, keep your nose

"out of our business or...

or you'll get your can kicked."

Well.

Guess we better forget about the whole matter now.

Oh, so you think we just better

let the whole thing die, is that it?

Yeah, I don't want to see my dad getting hurt.

Richard?

Exposing an extortionist

is much more important than getting kicked.

Besides, nobody kicks Howard Cunningham's can

without getting kicked back!

Oh.

Yeah, but-but, Dad?

Dad, you didn't see this guy.

I mean, this guy was... he...

And he was... And up here, nothing.

Absolutely nothing at all.

He was wide and... what a poker he had.

It was... Who cares, Richard?!

I mean, first, it was the tea tax in Boston,

and now it's the garbage tax in Milwaukee.

Tell me something: Are you digging into this mess

just to get a good grade in school,

or are you really trying for justice?

I-I'm trying for justice.

Truth and justice.

Psst. Come here.

What's the matter with his mouth?

I got an informant.

Oh, nothing, Dad. That's just the way we talk now.

Can we trust him?

I'm his father.

Right. Besides, he already knows.

And look over there, Fonz.

Somebody threatened your can?

Let me tell you something.

We're gonna crack this case. You understand?

I got a plan.

What is it, Fonz?

All right.

Ralph and Potsie's apartment.

You be there 11:00.

I'll have the informant there.

Alone. Be there alone.

All right. Oh, Fonz?

What if Ralph and Potsie are doing something?

What are those two gonna be doing?

Okay, girls.

Señor Potsie will now sing.

Uh, someone's at the door.

- Come in. - Please!

Oh, oh, hello, everybody.

Look, I'm sorry to break up all the fun,

but I got... What are you guys doing?

Hi, Rich.

Oh, no. Not the ventriloquist bit.

Uh, okay, look. I got to talk to you.

Come on, please, Ralph, Potsie, come on.

I have to talk to you right away.

All right, all right, talk.

Don't go away, girls.

We got a big finish!

Rich, telephone operators!

Ring-a-ding-ding.

Oh, right, right. "Ring-a-ding-ding."

Look, I need a favor from you guys.

I got to have your apartment right away.

Got a hot one, huh, Rich?

Hey, Pots, look!

She lets him take pictures!

No kidding?!

Oh, yeah, it is a hot one, yeah.

P-Pictures, uh, tape recordings, the whole bit.

No!

Yeah!

Ooh!

Lori Beth!

Oh, no, it's not Lori Beth.

No. No, it's a new girl.

But I have to be alone with her, okay?

Sounds good to us.

Where you going, girls?

You haven't seen the end of the act yet.

Oh, yes, we have.

We'll see you.

Don't call us. We'll call you.

Wait a minute, wait a minute!

You're missing the best part!

I was gonna turn Señor Potsie's head completely around!

You can show us on the way home.

Completely around?

It won't hurt.

Just kidding, Pots.

Take care of the girls.

Rich, you're amazing! Tape recorders, cameras!

Who would've thought... Richie Cunningham a weirdo?

Weirdo?

Chachi, what are you doing here?

- I live in the building, remember? - Oh.

What are you doing here?

Well, I need the apartment.

I have to be alone with someone.

Say no more, Rich.

I'm a man of the world.

You know, you're lucky I got here before she did.

I got just what you need.

Chachi's You Can Make Out on the First Date Kit.

Yeah, she's gonna be here any second, Chachi.

- I don't have time to... - The kit contains

an empty wine bottle.

With a candle in it.

Very romantic.

She's not the "candle in the bottle" type.

- Now, would you go...? - And it also contains

Chachi's Special Books of Sweet Nothings

to Whisper in Her Ears.

Two volumes.

Yeah, two volumes.

One for each ear.

She's hard of hearing.

Now, would you get out of here?!

And it also contains a dime.

A dime? Why a dime?

If you get tired, call me.

Yeah, yeah.

Ralph would love that.

Come on, will you hit the road?

Hi, Fonz.

Wah, wah, wah.

Will you please get out of here?

I got some, uh, private business.

Boy, can't sell anything tonight.

Must be the recession.

So long, Fonz.

So long, lady I'm dying to meet.

Wah, wah, wah...

Uh, Fonz?

Is this, uh...?

Uh, yeah. Excuse me for a minute.

I'll be right back, my sweet.

Fonz, is this the informant?

Because if it is, I'm glad I brought my camera.

This is no informant.

And you can't take a camera.

Will you please put this down?

Don't you know anything about informing?

This is on the QT.

Oh, it's my first time. I'm sorry.

Look.

Your informant will be in the alley.

- Huh? - You won't speak to him.

You won't see him.

All you'll see is his silhouette.

Oh, that's a great idea.

Well, I got the idea from Clarice over here.

You see, I was just walking down the street,

and I look up at this shade, and there she was.

Oh.

She must cast some shadow.

I'll tell you, she barely fit on that shade.

All right, okay.

So, I'm gonna talk to him

- through the window, right? - Wrong.

There's no talking.

Get up here.

He's going to hit the garbage cans.

Once for yes, twice for no.

You got that?

Oh, that's very clever.

That way, I can't indentify his...

his voice in court or anything.

You got to protect them.

- It's import... - Cunningham?

Well, it is very clever.

All right, are you ready?

Yes, I am.

Uh, excuse me, stranger.

Be right with you.

Yeah?

Fonzie, this is Al.

That's right, it's Al.

You want somebody who knows.

Al knows.

Al? How does he know anything about the...?

Oh, you're right. I got you. Don't ask.

Okay.

I'm gonna, uh, do a little investigating myself.

However, I ain't gonna report it.

Adios, amigos.

Right.

Whoa!

Thanks, Fonz!

All right, uh, Mr. Informant?

Let's see, it's, uh, uh,

once for yes, twice for no, right?

Oh, good.

Uh, can you hear me okay?

Fine. I can hear you good, too.

All right.

Hmm.

Uh, here's the first question.

Is it someone higher up in the Sanitation Department

who's getting the kickbacks from the garbagemen?

Oh, it is. And-and everybody's afraid to talk, right?

I knew it!

What is it? Is it the mob?

Oh, what a scoop that would be.

Al Capone, Lucky Luciano.

I'm really hot now.

Oh, right. Not that hot.

Okay, uh... All right.

One, one person keeps cropping up.

The dispatcher.

Is he the one?

He is! He's the one!

I knew it! All right.

Al, how can I prove it?

There's only one thing you can do, Richie.

You knew it was me, didn't you?

- Well, yeah, I-I did. - Oh, boy.

Now my cousin the garbageman's gonna get in a lot of trouble

- for telling me about it. - No, he won't!

No, a reporter's sources are sacred.

Are you sure?

I'm positive.

All right, listen.

There's a new dispatcher on your father's route.

He worked this racket before.

Just ask him where he got his motorboat.

Motorboat?

- Yeah, the summerhouse. - Summerhouse?

And a dishwasher.

A di... Well, Al.

A lot of people have dishwashers.

One that cooks and makes beds?

No, kidding. He's got a maid, too?

Oh, boy, I tell you.

I'm gonna show him Investigative Reporting 101.

This is fantastic, Al.

Rich, wait, someone's coming. I got to get out of here!

All right, thanks a lot!

Oh, boy!

I got to write all this stuff down.

This is fantastic.

Professor Garrity?

Uh, you wanted to talk to me?

Wanted to talk to you? Ha!

I'll tell the world I wanted to talk to you!

Come over here!

You know what's been happening?

I've been on the phone for the last half hour

with the sanitation commissioner!

The commissioner? He has no reason to call you...

The district attorney's office has been yelling at me!

The Better Business Bureau! The mayor's office!

All yelling!

- I'm sorry, I... - Sorry?!

I love it!

That's newspapering.

Really?

You-you love it?

Cunningham, you murdered them!

You nailed them to the wall.

The dispatcher had to resign to avoid prosecution.

Cunningham, you took the stink out of Milwaukee's garbage.

I love it!

Oh, gee! We murdered 'em.

Think of the grade I'm gonna get now.

You got a "B."

A "B"?

For taking the stink out of Milwaukee's garbage?

Cunningham, you did a great job.

But I know you can do better.

And I don't want to ever see you relax and sit back, no.

If you keep on the way you are, you're gonna make something

there's darn few of.

A real newspaperman.

Richard?

Your mother told me what a good job you did

with that story, and I just want you to know

how proud I am of you.

Well, I'm proud of you, Dad.

There aren't too many fathers who'd put their can

on the line for their son's newspaper story.

Hmm.

You're really something special.

Ah!

Aw.

Thanks, son.

Oh, hello, Lori Beth, Richard.

Hurry, Howard. We don't want to be late.

Have fun with your homework.

We will.

Isn't it nice how they do their homework together every night?

Mm-hmm.

Leave the lights on, will you, Richard?

Okay, we'll leave the lights on.

Yeah, good night, kids.

Stop worrying about him, Howard.

Richard's a good student.

They're in there studying their little hearts out.

♪ These happy days are yours and mine ♪

♪ These happy days are yours and mine, happy days. ♪

♪ Good-bye, gray sky, hello, blue ♪

♪ There's nothing can hold me when I hold you ♪

♪ It feels so right, it can't be wrong ♪

♪ Rockin' and rollin' all week long ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪ - ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪ - ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ These happy days are yours and mine ♪

♪ These happy days are yours and mine, Happy Days! ♪