Original subtitles

What's up?

You forgot to take out the trash, by the way. And clean the garage, so.

Holy shit, wife.

Bro, I can't. I'm busy. Look, Max. Like, okay, I can't. I can't be doing all

this stuff that you forget to do. Like, just do your fucking chores. It's not

that hard.

Why can't mom hire somebody?

Because you're not rich. What do you mean? Why can't she hire somebody?

Girl. I.

Depressed, okay? I shouldn't have to do manual labor around the house. Manual,

it's taking out the garbage.

Okay, I don't want to do this either, okay? I'm watching my look smashers. I'm

watching Cookie King. I'm watching Clav. Like, I'm bone smashing.

I have things to do.

I have orbits to tilt.

Like, you can't, you can't be doing all this. You gotta, you gotta do your shit

so I can do my stuff in peace.

You're such a lorper.

Dude, shut up. You're an incel. You're literally an incel, dude. Like, I bet.

I bet you're still obsessed with Asmongold and Nick Florentes. Like,

an incel.

Yeah, well, why?

Yeah, of course I am. Of course I am. I'm 28 and I live in your mom's house.

the fuck out of here. Hey!

Dude, seriously?

Really?

Dude.

I'm going to bone smash you.

Bone smash you?

You want to see?

Listen, my... Listen.

My life is not a joke, okay? I'm a true self freak.

all right you know what you have no idea your looks max and what a what a joke

okay you're a point you're already high you're already you already won yeah i

wasn't always a light i wasn't always a true eve you think i was born like this

no we have the same like no no i became true

stacy and like eve through hard labor and work okay you wouldn't get

it i if cookie king can go from being incel to fucking

gorgeous man of the year, love Cookie King, then so can you. Like, just get

shit together. Like, it's not that hard. You just lost some weight.

Like, where is it? You have to... Okay, but... It's all brain rot. It's all

nonsense. It's stupid. Okay, so who's your star? I am... I'm cooked.

I'm trying.

It's not over, though.

It's been over. It never began.

Your candle tilt isn't that bad, bro. Bro, it could be worse, okay? I think if

you just do some plastic surgery maxing and get your, like, candle tilt.

What is that? I think you'll be fine.

What do you mean candle tilt? What are you talking about? It's your eyeball

tilt.

Like, what?

What do you mean? Like.

It's your all brown tilt.

It's your eyes tilt.

It's you have hunter eyes, not prey.

I have hunter eyes?

Yeah. It could be over, but it's not. You just have to apply yourself, I

What else do I have to know?

Well, there's a lot of stuff that you can max.

Testosterone maxing, Adderall maxing. Like, bro, there's so much stuff you can

do to fix yourself.

Plastic surgery waxing? Like clav?

Where am I supposed to get money to do plastic surgery? You just have to start

screaming or something. I don't know. Get OnlyFans.

Everybody has some money.

I need to do plastic surgery and do drugs and I'll have a good life. Yeah,

exactly. Basically.

You have to bone smash.

You're such a virgin, dude.

Yes, I am. You need to get your shit together. I'm a true soul.

I've never held a girl's hand.

I've never kissed a girl. You're not even a real incel.

A real incel would never call us girls. He would call us foids. You're literally

such a faker. I just called you a foid a second ago.

Well, you're a faker.

Like, there, you're touching a foid.

A foid has touched you.

Excuse me. You can't get violent, okay? That's not cool.

Don't do that.

You freaking weirdo.

Gosh. It doesn't even count. You're my stepsister.

holding hands with my stepsisters i mean what a pathetic sick twisted joke that

is my life dude you just literally need to clean the garage like i'm in the

middle of watching cookie king edits like dude look okay i know that you're

hopeless and sad but if cookie king can go from grotesque and horrific looking

to like chad light so can you like look at these edits bro

Look, look.

That's Cookie King.

Yeah, but wait, wait, look.

He gets really hot.

Like, this is him in not his best shape, okay?

This is Cookie King.

But look, he transforms.

Can you see this?

Look, he's gorgeous now.

He looks fat in that video.

I mean, he's got good genetics. He's like a handsome guy.

Yeah, but he was, he was looks maxing. That's how he got gorgeous.

That's why I'm busy with my thing. So you just need to get your shit together.

Maybe start looks maxing instead of, instead of Nick Fuentes maxing or

the fuck. Yeah, well, looking better is not enough.

It's not, it's not enough to. It will though. It literally will save you. It

saved me.

It saved me, bro. Looks maxing saved us.

You giggle, but it's true. It's truth. Truth nuke.

Benjamin and Yahoo, what you think?

You think he's looks maxing? No, he's killing maxing.

That's why he's ugly.

And his life is bad. Because he's not a looks maxer. Because he's not watching

Clav and Jenny Popach, his girlfriend.

And Cookie King.

Gorgeous Cookie King.

Beautiful, amazing, splendid Cookie King. I like him. He's the soulmate of

life. The internet was a mistake.

Without the internet, you wouldn't know what incel is.

You're like Chris Champ. I'd have a good life. I'd probably have a wife and kids

and stuff.

No, you wouldn't have a child life. You would be the wife.

Be serious.

Be serious. No.

Whatever. Just look to Max. Well, they don't make... Even if I looked better,

I still don't know how to talk to girls.

I'm still a weird incel freak. You think Cookie King is a Rizdog, bro? He's so

awkward. My penis is tiny.

It can't be that tiny.

I mean, I've seen your dads for unrelated purposes, but, like, genetics,

can't be that fat.

Well, it's not that, it's not great.

It's not fucking... Well, I mean, have you even, like, had sex before?

I'm a trousseau! I'm fucking, no!

No, absolutely not. You're a trousseau? Yes. Okay, well, I was a fucking cell,

and I have an incel... I have a sick, twisted, fucked life, okay?

I don't have a job.

You're 28, you're living in my mom's house.

Okay, but with all this free time, you should be slinging dick. Like, what else

are you doing? You're just rotting in your room.

Yeah, that's not, yeah, it's not that easy.

Do you think if I could, if I had an option?

Do you think Asmongold is a person? Do you not understand what insult means? It

means I am involuntary celibate. Yes. I'm aware. I can't. I'm locked in. I

cannot have sex. I'm not allowed by society.

Allowed? Fools will not touch me.

I just touched you. I'm a void.

Like, girl, you're so dramatic.

You're literally so dramatic.

Like, if Asmongold can swing dick, then so can you. Be serious.

I love Asmongold.

What are you doing? I'm sure it's fine.

What are you doing?

Just penis smacks. Like, it'll be fine.

See, it's not bad.

Look, it looks horrific.

You're so dramatic.

I've seen so much worse.

It looks horrible.

No, it doesn't. You just need to have penis smacks.

You're touching it. Why are you touching it?

Because I'm helping you. I'm being a good stepsister. This is what we're

okay? I'm helping you.

Like, you just need to penis max it. Like, it's not that hard.

Look, okay, this will help me anyway for my jaw maxing, because I'm trying to

bring my jaw forward.

So I'm going to use it as, like, an exercise, and you can, like, benefit

that. I don't fucking know. You're a weirdo. Oh,

this is really scary.

Scary? You friggin', dude, it's fine.

There's nothing scary about this. Be serious.

The only scary thing here is Asmongold.

I saw you watching him earlier on your friggin' laptop, you weirdo.

What are you, like, secretly in love with him or something? Who cares?

A lot of people watch Asmongold.

A lot of incels do. You need to switch up your content and start watching Clav

and Cookie King.

The Cookieverse, bro. 19 -year -old drug addicts?

Doing street interviews in Miami?

It's Del Rey, actually, not Miami.

Just shut up.

not even that big it's literally average it might be a little bit bigger than

normal actually like it's a normal dick like i don't know why you're complaining

so much it's literally fine like

you don't think it's like fucking you don't think it's like disgusting

why would i think that it's literally normal like i mean sure it's missing a

hoodie but that's okay oh happens to the best of us

Yeah, unfortunate.

Whatever. It's fine. It's normal. I think you're just being really dramatic,

what I think.

Oh, fuck.

Here we come.

Already? It's been like five seconds.

What?

I'm jaw training, okay? I'm literally just chipping the way my tongue moves.

Like, stop it. Okay, sorry. I just never... I'm using this as a look

exercise. You need to stop being so friggin' black -pilled, bro. Just be

Gosh. Okay, I just never got a blowjob before, so...

it's not even for like blowjob purposes it's literally for my looks maxing like

don't even say that you weirdo this is literally for looks maxing okay like

don't make it weird okay

This is like low -key turning me on a little bit. I'm not gonna lie.

Just a little bit though.

I'm tired of you just, like, sitting around and not doing anything all day,

we're changing your life now. You're not going to be, like, incel -pilled

anymore, okay? No black pill in here.

Right?

No, I can't lose my actual virginity to my stepsister. Why? That's, like, a porn

thing, right?

That's not normal. That's a normal thing in my culture.

Yeah, that's, like, every guy wants to lose their virginity to their friggin'

hot stepsister. Like, be serious.

See, you don't seem to be processing it all that much.

This is probably the only shot I got.

Yeah, really.

From now on, you're going to be a look smacker, okay? I'm going to fix you.

not over yet, okay? We're going to have surgery, Max.

Okay. It's going to be fine. Trust.

I just, like, I don't know what I'm doing.

Yeah, that's okay. That's why I'm here, okay?

Not only am I a looks matcher, but I've had so much sex.

Like, I'm a professional at this, basically.

You're in good hands.

And good pussies.

See,

I know you've been, like, curious to what my boobs look like. I've seen you

stare at them before.

I can squeeze them, right? Yeah.

Yes, of course you can.

Oh, shit.

See? You're amazing.

You think so?

Yeah, I think so.

You could get to, like, cookie king status.

Licks maxing is just one of the many forms of licks maxing.

Hey, you're the expert.

Trust whatever you say.

Exactly. I'm basically Cookie King, but with boobs.

Okay. Yeah.

Can I do a doggy style?

You can try that, yeah.

Okay. Do you think you're up for it? Yeah, I'm up for it.

Okay.

Am I doing okay?

Yeah, you're doing fine. You're doing great.

I don't think you can really fuck this one up.

Okay.

Even though I mean, I was just an insult freak.

Okay, but you're not anymore. You should be card.

Okay.

See?

Shut up. Shut up.

Whatever. I've seen your search history. I'm not a gooner, okay?

You're not a gooner.

I just... Appreciate the arts.

Yeah. Yeah. From time to time.

For sure.

Right, like that time I saw your search history. All born.

And it was weird shit, too. It was like Elmo.

Like, what?

There's a lot of stuff. Yeah, World 34.

Sometimes... Paul McCartney, Femboy. Bro.

It's like people... Like, I watch stuff that's like a joke. Yeah, I get it. Paul

McCartney's hot.

I bet you would say that.

Really?

Oh my

gosh,

I can use this as a face cream, actually, in the lip smacking community.

that sometimes.

So this is actually going to be really useful. Thank you for this.

You're just making shit up now. No, I'm not. It's literally good for your skin.

It's like a face mask.

Besides protein.

It's like literally the most purest form of protein. Whatever. I have so much to

teach you about lip smacking.

Let's go watch Cookie King. Alright, you're the boss.