Original subtitles

Yes?

I'd like a room, please.

Well...

I only got one left.

7B, down in the basement.

That sounds fine.

The air's not too good down there.

Installed a duct, but it don't blow through.

I don't mind.

Well, there's a boiler down there.

Too big to move out.

That's no problem.

Cleaning lady don't clean much.

She don't like to go down there.

She's afraid of what's growing down there.

I could clean it myself.

Well...

Go ahead and sign in, then.

Well, I hope you enjoy your stay at the Grand Hotel.

You have a nice evening.

Except for biology.

I always had a talent for that kinda jig.

And home ec.

Baking, that sort of thing.

People are just hungry to hear about it.

And my job puts me in contact with a lot of people,

but I don't really know anybody.

Yeah, it's not the most elegant line of work,

but it pays the bills.

And I'm not gonna be in the Grand Hotel forever.

No, sir.

Sooner or later, hopefully, I'll get enough money

to have my own kind of place.

Maybe get into baking professionally.

There's a lot of dough in that line of work.

Yes?

All moved in?

Uh-huh.

Did you get all your stuff moved in?

Yeah, thanks.

Do you need anything?

No, I don't think so.

Would you like me to check your duct?

My duct?

Yeah, the last party that was in there

said the air didn't blow through right.

Uh...

No, it seems fine.

How would you like to see a film, then?

A film?

Yeah, I got a pretty good one here.

Educational documentary.

The story of electromagnetic induction.

Oh, yeah.

I'm kinda tired, though.

Oh.

Maybe some other time?

Uh-huh.

Goodnight.

- Who's there? - Cleaning lady.

Oh, hi.

I need to clean.

Um, that's all right.

I'll take care of it myself.

Well, if that's the way it has to be.

Just bet you'll do it yourself.

You and that other one in 6B.

Look at this place, it's filthy.

Absolutely filthy.

Cobwebs all over the place.

Well, I'm not gonna take them down.

No, ma'am.

I wash my hands of it.

There's a limit to what I'll do.

And this place passed it a long time ago!

Oh, god!

This, what? Rocks.

Hi, there!

Oh, I'm sorry.

- That's okay. - Here, let me help you.

I guess we're neighbors.

The name's Trixie.

Trixie Turner.

Pleased to meet you.

I'm Connie Sproutz.

How's it going, Connie?

What're you doing in a dump like this?

Oh, renting a room.

Yeah, what else?

Would you like to come in for a drink or somethin'?

I can't right now.

I've gotta check on something.

Oh, sure thing.

Take a rain check, huh?

Yeah.

Catch you later, Connie.

Bye.

Hi, Connie!

Hi, Trixie.

Thought I might take you up on that rain check.

Sure thing!

Come on in.

Would you like a drink or somethin'?

Uh, yeah.

What'll you have?

Grain alcohol.

Huh?

Or maybe some vodka.

Ah, gotcha.

I'm glad you could come over.

Took that myself in the middle of the desert in Nevada.

Been interested in UFOs ever since.

You believe in them?

No, I'm afraid I don't.

There's a lot of weird things going on up there.

And down here, too.

Some of the freaks I meet

might as well be from another planet.

Here you go.

- Thank you. - Have a seat.

So...

How do you like the Grand Hotel?

Oh, it's very nice.

Yeah, right.

They oughta burn it down and get the insurance money.

You from out of town?

Um, yes. I've moved around a lot.

Yeah, me too.

Rootless is what they call it.

I was most recently in Chelsea, Idaho.

Chelsea?

Never heard of it.

It's a small place, a company town.

Hm, I don't know much about Idaho,

except that it stands for potatoes.

I read that on a license plate once.

Yes, they have lots of potatoes there.

Your folks live there?

No.

Hm, I lost mine.

They were flower children.

They came from flowers?

Yeah, right, Connie.

You never heard of flower children?

No, I've heard of flower girls.

No, flower children put flowers in their hair

and live in shacks and hang around fields chanting.

That sort of thing.

My parents owned a potato farm in Mendocino.

A Caneel type deal.

But then it caught blight and they disappeared one day.

Never saw them again.

Hit the streets pretty soon after that.

So, what line of work are you in?

Oh, I'm an inventor.

- An inventor? - Mm-hm!

I used to work for Plasmaster but now I'm out on my own.

You know somethin', Connie?

You and me are a lot alike.

I could tell, the first time I saw ya.

You could?

Yeah!

Both stuck in a sewer

but we got big plans for the future.

Not supposed to be any pets in this hotel.

Geez, I thought you were

some kind of aardvark or something!

What the fuck are you doing?

Ah, nothin'.

Just got another film here.

I thought you'd like to see it.

Another one of those damn school movies again?

Yeah, the story of electrochemical reactions.

No, I'm busy.

Oh, got a customer?

No, a friend.

Oh, 7B, eh?

How'd you gals like to come upstairs

and join me in a libation?

No, if you don't mind.

Ah.

The alien organism infests the human host

like a neural parasite, occupying the skull cavity

while maintaining the host's brain externally.

The body is internally altered

and several new organs are formed,

including one for disintegrating the victims

and another for secreting their brain cells,

compacted and reorganized, but still alive.

Outwardly, it resembles an enormous protoplasm or amoeba,

though it is vastly more complex

and seems to possess an almost diabolical intelligence.

It is capable of telepathic manipulation

and even psychokinetic changes in its immediate environment.

This is probably how it has avoided detection for so long.

Good god.

Are they conscious?

Able to think in there,

in some dark limbo?

The subconscious mind of the human host

is not under its control.

It is for this reason that the so-called Damp-a-Dream Machine

was designed and patented by Connie Sproutz.

It prevents the dreams of the alienated brain

from becoming physically real.

I must emphasize the importance

of destroying the creature completely.

I disagree strongly with Dr. Brainard's suggestion

that we attempt to take the creature alive

for some possible military use.

It is simply too dangerous

and the consequences could be disastrous.

The creature must be eradicated before it escapes

and finds new victims.

Who were you, Connie Sproutz?

Before that thing found you and changed you.

I could almost feel sorry for you.

Connie?

Connie, are you in there?

The tube checks out fine.

Not a darn thing wrong with it.

I wonder if it might be these thunderstorms

we've been having.

I guess I'm just going to have to stay up

until they blow over.

Hey, you want some potato salad?

No, potatoes don't agree with me.

Hey, look at that transformer.

Oh, yeah. What about it?

Well, I was just thinking

about the low-frequency radiation.

It affects people living in the vicinity of the lines.

Oh, really?

Yeah, it can even cause DNA mutations.

You know something, Connie?

That's what I like about you.

You're always thinking.

Maybe you can think of a way for us to get out of that damn hotel.

Maybe we should run away together.

Somewhere, anywhere away from that dump.

You know, it's a black hole.

Nothing that gets in ever gets out.

So, what've you got to drink around here?

What's this?

Oh, that's some shine I made.

You kidding me?

No.

Oh!

This stuff's got a kick.

It's 198 proof.

Hot creepers, you drink this stuff all the time?

Do you want some?

No, I think I'd just like some coffee.

Oh, okay.

You look like you need it.

Well, I haven't been sleeping very well.

Well, some coffee oughta wake you up.

Actually it doesn't really do much do much

for me when I drink it.

Well, what else would you do with it?

I haven't been getting my beauty rest, either, lately.

I keep having these nightmares.

Dreams are all absurd.

I don't know about that, Connie.

I believe you can interpret your dreams

and if you can interpret your dreams,

you can figure out everything.

You know exactly what to do with your life.

Dreams are nothing but random electrochemical activity

originating in the cortex.

In the what?

The brain stem.

It's the most primitive part of the mind.

Geez, Connie, where do you pick up all this stuff?

Oh, here and there.

Various people I've...

met.

Hm.

I admire that.

You know, you're a lot smarter than your average dope.

You oughta be proud of that.

You got brains.

This is an ohmmeter.

The ohmmeter measures electrical resistance in ohms,

and ohms is the unit of resistance equivalent

to the resistance of a conductor in which one volt,

the unit difference of...

Madam Kildegaard determined that the current does not flow

unobstructed without being measured twice.

On Sundays, the current tends to lessen.

However, voting is permitted.

That the potential difference between two metals

is based upon their mutual dislike.

If the current flows between them and the metals

are not in mutual harmony, a discord will erupt,

producing catastrophic effects,

especially among recourses that prefer suckers to bonbons.

The Greeks, of course, discovered electricity,

though they had types inferior to old Ben Franklin

who could not contain his flatulence during the meetings

of the Continental First Congress,

which meant every day except for Sundays,

when the current did not flow,

unless two metals which detested each other

were in mutual discord and grated loudly

like the sound of fingernails on a blackboard,

which Madam Kildegaard detested,

even though she was very well built.

Speaking of well built, the Empire State Building

was well constructed until the metals in its girder system

expanded and bloated due to excess stomach acid

and spewed several albino rhinoceros.

God, I need some coffee.

Great Scott.

Could I be having flashbacks?

The lysergic acid experiments.

You feeling lonely tonight?

I sure am.

You live at the Grand Hotel, don't you?

Oh, so you've seen me before!

A secret admirer.

Hey, love that hair!

I do admire distinguished older gentlemen like you.

Yes, I'd like to ask you a question.

Sure, if it's about money,

I'd like to get that settled right off the bat.

No, it's not about money.

There's another young woman who lives at the Grand Hotel,

- perhaps you know her? - Sure!

A lot of people live at that dump.

But who cares?

You and me are the only ones who matter tonight.

Cute coat.

It makes you look so mysterious.

That will be enough of that.

The other young woman's name is Connie Sproutz.

Fuck! A cop!

Watch your language, young lady.

I am not a police officer. I'm a scientist and an investigator.

I merely wanted to ask you a few questions about your friend.

- What friend? - Connie Sproutz.

I know all about your acquaintance with her, Miss Turner.

Hey! How do you know my name?

It's my job to know your name.

Dr. Sigmund Sylvanus.

Plasmaster Corporation Special Investigations Unit.

Plasmaster?

Yes, we first became interested in Connie Sproutz

when she applied for a job in our research department.

Showed amazing scientific ability.

You might even say superhuman.

Then after the mysterious death of Dr. Usapius Termaline,

our brilliant head of research,

we decided to launch a full investigation.

Oh, really?

That's so fascinating, I'm about to fall asleep.

Well, perhaps this would interest you.

I have learned several amazing things

about your friend, Connie Sproutz.

Who?

Oh, come, come, Miss Turner.

We know that she lives right next door to you,

or perhaps I should say, it lives right next door.

Hey!

She might not be the cutest thing under the sun,

but she sure blows your butt out of the water.

Now, listen to me, Miss Turner.

For the last three years,

I have tracked Connie Sproutz all over this nation.

Everywhere she goes, people disappear.

So what? People disappear all the time.

Why don't you do me a favor and get lost yourself?

I am warning you, Miss Turner.

Your friend, Connie Sproutz, that seemingly shy and likable girl

may actually be the result of an obscene merger

of human and extraterrestrial DNA.

What psycho ward did you check out of, huh?

I'm telling you this for your own good.

Look, I've almost completed my report.

We're finished here, bud!

But, please, I...

Miss Sproutz, what a pleasure.

Dr. Sigmund Sylvanus, Plasmaster Corporation.

I've been looking forward to meeting you for a long time.

All right, you've got me here. Now where's the brain?

Right this way.

This is my home away from home, do you like it?

Oh, it's nothing like my own lab in Chelsea,

but it's sufficient for my needs.

Here we are.

Just a moment, Miss Sproutz.

May I call you Connie?

Seems as though I know you,

after following your career for the past three years.

Why? What do you care about me?

Oh, Plasmaster cares a great deal about you, Miss Sproutz.

Plasmaster? I've never heard of it.

Oh, come, come, Miss Sproutz.

I know all about your work for Dr. Termaline

in our research and development lab.

You were his best pupil, weren't you?

Yes, you had quite a bright future ahead of you

with Plasmaster, didn't you?

Pet of Dr. Termaline, darling of the Board of Directors.

Termaline was a great scientist,

possibly the greatest of this century,

and how did you repay him for his tutelage and his kindness?

How, Miss Sproutz?

Leave me alone!

By turning him into a disgusting mass of organic sludge!

-And eating him. - I didn't mean to.

No, no, no more than you meant to disintegrate

and cannibalize those countless fringe dwellers

and transients that you murdered.

I didn't murder anyone, they're still alive.

You call that living?

Being trapped in pulpy nodule of undifferentiated cells?

Give me my brain!

What do you think you're doing?

Nothing to worry about, Miss Sproutz.

The Plasmaster Neural Vibrator merely induces

a semi-hypnotic state similar to REM stage sleep.

There's nothing to be afraid of.

I wouldn't do that, if I were you.

Connie?

Arrhythmic heartbeat.

Caustic spores regenerating.

Cycle not yet complete.

All right, you pervert. Back off!

Connie?

What did you do to her?

Miss Turner, I must insist that you leave at once.

You're interrupting a very important investigation

authorized by the Plasmaster Corporation.

Can you carry a tune?

What? Can I carry a tune?

Yes, as a matter of fact,

I happen to sing baritone with a barbershop quartet,

but I fail to see the relevance of that, I...

Well, I'll tell you.

If you don't get out of here right now, you're going to be singing soprano

with the piano boys choir.

Please, Miss Turner, I implore you.

You're dealing with a dangerous mutant.

Oh, is that what you are? Well, I had my suspicions.

Now back off, Jack!

Connie?

Connie, wake up.

We've gotta get you out.

There, you see?

Is that what you call a friend?

This thing, this aberration that calls itself Connie Sprout

is an inhuman creature that has killed hundreds,

perhaps thousands of innocent people.

I don't believe you.

That's Connie.

She's my friend.

No, she's no one's friend.

She's a disease, she's a germ that must be isolated,

studied, classified and stamped out

for the good of society.

- Connie, it's okay. - Trixie?

Ow!

Here we are.

That Sylvanus creep is out cold.

You'll be safe here for a little bit.

That's a pretty bad zit you got there, Connie.

I have a plastic surgeon friend who could take care of it for ya.

He does real good work.

Okay.

Well, I'm gonna go get packed and you wait here, okay?

I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere.

I know you're in there, 7B.

Come on!

Connie?

Connie?