Original subtitles

[opening theme music playing]

[upbeat music playing]

[Mr. Small Jr.] Like me, the joyful days of your life

will slowly bleed into a strange nothingness,

leaving you naught but a barren, desolate husk

beneath the sterile glare of a neon office light.

Your joy, your dedication, your talent,

every whisper of a dream, painfully drained out of you

by the same soulless machine that rules us all,

until nothing else is left but the ash and taste

of squandered time in your mouth. [whimpers]

[hesitates] Excuse me,

but what the what is going on here?

Oh, I just wanted to say goodbye before...

[sobbing] ...I leave this job.

You two were always my favorites.

You're fired?

Huh. That does explain the, uh, general aura.

[spooky rumbling sound]

Not fired. That's such a negative word.

Hmm. Fun-employed?

That's better.

[thuds and cries]

This job was all I had.

But we... we need a school counselor.

Who's gonna stop us the next time

we get a stupid idea like trash our home

so we don't have to do homework?

[sobbing]

-[brooding music playing] -Her name was Ms. Combs.

She came out of nowhere.

She bewitched

-the executive staff. -[gasps]

[Mr. Small Jr.] Loud, assertive, invincible.

She took our job.

[whimpers]

I'm sorry. I have to pack now.

[crying]

I think he needs a hand dealing with some, you know, issues.

There, there. [kissing]

[Mr. Small sobbing] Thank you.

[kissing] There, there, Father.

[Mr. Small sobbing]

[Mr. Small Jr.] Bye.

[both] We need to talk to our principal!

[militant drums playing]

-[slams] -Hey! Mr. Small might be

a dirty-ponytailed, flip-flop-wearing slacker,

but he's our useless, bongo-playing,

crystal-worshiping wellness wizard

that smells weird.

-[eerie music playing] -[whimpers]

[Ms. Combs] Is that the two troublemakers

that everyone talks about?

-[creaks and shuts] -[music crescendos]

[both gasp]

Well...

-[tape gun cocks] -...this is what you get.

I can't believe she labeled me as vulnerable.

And I can't believe you're not presently flipping tables

like a goat on fire.

Aren't you at least a little bit mad?

She got Mr. Small sacked,

and she labeled you as a bad kid.

[Gumball] It's straight up facts, though.

I'm as bad as they come.

No! Don't believe the labels.

[camera shutter clicking sounds]

So bad they can't ignore me.

Labeling kids limits their vision of themselves.

And how did you exactly interpret your bad kid label?

-I'm a baddy, baby. -[snapping fingers]

That's how my mommy made me.

-[electronic music playing] -[humming in tune]

Right.

Well, looks like you misinterpreted the meaning

in an unexpected, yet somewhat empowering way.

But trust me, it's bad to label kids.

Huh?

Why?

Because clearly it ends up defining who they are.

Come on. We need to rally the other kids against this.

[upbeat techno music playing]

'Sup, honey? Want to go bad places

and do bad things to people?

[humming in tune]

He means we need your help to stop the labeling.

[grunts and thuds]

I think.

[hesitates] I don't know, guys, if I should really do that,

I just... I...

I don't really feel like, uh, doing that.

[hesitates] I'm not sure I should...

Uh, I should probably just, you know...

Sorry.

Alan, uh, help us, please.

[barks]

Oh, hey, guys, I can help. I can help.

I can do that for you.

Wait, wait, wait. I forgot my locker in my phone.

[grunting and slamming]

Oh, a bird.

Did you know that a pearlfish

nests inside the backside of a sea cucumber?

Shake my booty. You guys wanna dance?

-Come dance with me. -[humming in sing-sing voice]

Ooh, this is a good dance. Maybe I can do this one.

[humming in sing-sing voice]

Oh, no, Ms. Combs already got to everyone.

-[screaming] -[tense music playing]

[sobbing]

-[gasps] -[grunting]

[both] Huh?

Yo, what's going on?

[grunting and screaming]

[both gasp]

[both] Huh?

[breathing softly]

[growling loudly]

Oh, no! This thing is getting to me too.

-[screaming] -[clangs]

I'm vulnerable. [screams]

-[thuds] -[groans]

-[gasps] -[buzzes]

[electricity crackling]

[screaming]

Hmm? Mmm.

Is this seat not taken by anyone else?

[gasps]

Alas, poor yoghurt. I knew you so well.

[crying]

Ooh, yeah.

Hey, what are you doing?

Making sure I don't choke on this mashed potato.

Throwing shade isn't gonna help you shine.

Gotta stop giving CPR to dead situations.

-Blood type BU. -[buzzing]

I can't. It's wormed its way into my brain.

Now I feel constantly vulnerable.

And unlike you, there's no weird, deluded way

of interpreting my label.

It's actually a curse to look this good.

I'm terrified of aging now.

At least your short future doesn't involve having kids

just to exploit their image

once you're too ugly for the socials. Hmm.

[groaning]

Hey, Tobias, looks like you're a little lost there.

Uh, let me help. I can, just, uh, rip this meat.

[grunting]

-[splats] -[unseen person] Ow!

That's it!

[militant drums playing]

-[music stops abruptly] -Wait, what are we doing?

Uh, angrily marching to Principal Brown's office

and demanding he put a stop to this nonsense

once and for all.

Oh, right.

[militant drums continue]

[sobbing]

Okay. What the, what the, what the, what the, what now?

[sobbing] I'm not quite sure how it happened,

but Ms. Combs convinced me to retire.

-[somber music playing] -I tried to protest,

but she labeled me "defensive."

Aw, that's tough.

I'm really sorry that you're going through this difficult--

I'm not defensive! You're defensive!

[sobbing continues]

[brooding music playing]

Ugh! This woman is evil.

Gumball, do something bad immediately.

[upbeat dance music playing]

Yeah.

I meant to her.

I'm not evil.

I just suggested Principal Brown

needed some rest in his old age.

Isn't that right?

[groaning]

[exhales]

[snoring]

You need to stop with the labels.

It's turning everyone into-- [gasps]

Wait. She's... she's doing this to take over the school.

Those are wild accusations, young man.

In fact, you both seem a little dysfunctional.

[both glitching]

[disembodied voice] Listen, the two of you. Listen.

Okay. I get this day is cursed,

but disembodied voices? No, thank you.

[Mr. Small Jr.] No, it's me, Mr. Small Jr.

I've been living inside the walls.

I know it's weird and possibly concerning,

but like I said, this job is all I have.

But also, I knew my students would need my advice.

Open your ears.

-[uplifting music playing] -Labels are bad,

unless you choose them for yourself.

You see, their power goes both ways

because we become what we believe.

[both gasp]

[both laughing]

[both] Let's get our school back.

[upbeat music playing]

I know everything!

-[gasps] -[groaning]

Even which anime villain I would marry first!

Now go.

[loud crash and rumbling]

[groaning]

[growling]

[cackling]

[electricity crackling]

[screeching]

[yelling] I have...

I've got two shoes now.

Hmm?

[upbeat music continues]

[upbeat music ends]

Well, I stopped by that school

because I really needed the bathroom,

but they said it was for staff only,

so I made up some lies

about being sent by the Academy, and...

[slurps and chuckles]

...before you know it, they made me school counselor.

And I had the label machine with me,

so, you know, I improvised to keep the kids in check,

but everyone's completely nuts in here.

[laughs] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They take everything really literally.

-[giggling] -[whirring]

You know, they got themselves into this massive spiral,

and I don't know how to get out of it. [laughs]

Yeah, yeah, I'm the school principal now.

-[knocking at door] -And apparently-- Oh.

-Ugh. Wait, hold on. -[door buzzes]

Come in.

[tense music playing]

[Gumball] Your time is up, Ms. Combs.

-Huh? -[valiant music playing]

[Gumball] You can't label us anymore.

But wait, I can't read it. What's it say?

-[beam fires] -[loud crash]

[closing theme music playing]