Original subtitles

What the fuck?

Michael, what are you

doing here?

You guys changed the locks again. What the fuck? That's not cool. Your father

told you that if you drop out of school again, don't come home.

But... Parents always say that. They don't actually mean it. Besides, I

move in for like three months because my girlfriend kicked me out.

You didn't change my room into like a storage area, did you? I'm sorry,

but your dad was serious this time.

You dropped out again, and now you should probably just consider this a

lesson.

Great. Now I'm getting life lessons from my stepmom.

Hey, who the fuck is that?

That's Chris. We're renting out your room to him.

What? You rented out my room? I grew up there.

Michael, you are a grown man.

You moved out. We're not just keeping your crap in your old room.

You can't just have some fucking stranger living here.

He could be a serial killer.

Michael, you are being dramatic.

Do you need money for a new apartment or something?

Well, I guess I do now that I've been kicked out of my childhood home.

Just calm down. We'll figure something out. You look hungry, though. Do you

something to eat?

Have you been raving again?

I'm not starving.

And no, I haven't been raving again.

Whatever. Just introduce yourself to Chris and watch some TV. I'll make you a

sandwich.

Here, eat. It's my job.

You told them we were fucking?

Yes.

Chris is my lover now.

And it's a secret from your father.

Like you.

I can't believe this. First I lose my bedroom and now someone else is fucking

stepmom?

Maybe she likes me better.

Bro, I can fuck circles around you. Ariel, tell them who's better.

Michael, that's a hard decision. I mean, it's been so long since I've been with

you and Chris has been keeping me very happy.

You're both wonderful, though.

Let's fuck right now and you'll tell us who's better. Unless you're scared.

Skilled. Challenge accepted.

You guys are being ridiculous.

You both want to fuck and have me tell you who's better?

Yeah.

Oh, well.

All right, I'm down. This should be interesting.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Ah...

You're too fucking long.

Mwah!

It might be a close tie.

Oh, oh.

Oh, my God.

Oh, yeah.

Oh,

it's so good.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Fuck.

God, you guys work together so good.

Oh, fuck.

Oh my god.

Oh yeah.

uh um

Oh.

Oh, God.

Ugh!

ah ah ah

Your turn now. Yeah.

Yeah, why don't you boys switch?

um um

Oh, fuck.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, fuck.

Bye.

I can see why she keeps you around, Chris.

Round two.

Round two.

I'm so sorry.