Original subtitles

Morning. Oh, morning.

You off to work?

Yeah, big date station today.

Really? Yeah.

Bigger than the day that you interviewed the lady with an extra thumb?

Possibly.

Hopefully.

Well, just be careful.

Those people are crazy.

Not to worry. They're more surreal crazy than dangerous crazy.

Well, they have to be some kind of dangerous.

You've been there for six months, and you still haven't unpacked a thing.

Yeah, I kind of get tired of packing and unpacking, you know?

Well, maybe it's time for this cowboy to hang up the old spurs and six -shooter

and settle down on this ranch.

Maybe I should.

Giddy up.

It's a little tight.

Give it to me.

Oh, Mr. Carlson?

Oh, no, he's not available right now.

Where is he?

At the doctor.

And what is he doing there?

He's getting penile implants.

Yeah, sure, thanks.

Good morning, Mr. Carlson.

Call your mother when you get a chance.

Thank you, Jennifer. Could you please send Andy into my office when he gets

here? Sure thing, Mr. Carlson.

Good morning, Jennifer. How are you doing?

Well, there's something kind of big I need to get off my chest, Andy.

I can see that.

So tell me, what's been eating you out? I mean, eating at you, Jennifer.

Well, you know, I usually only answer three phone calls a day. Since this

contest, I've been doing like ten.

If this keeps up, I'm going to have to ask for a raise.

I understood, Jennifer, about that.

I have no fear. The contest is over as of today.

The finals will be in shortly, and Johnny's going to decide who's won those

front row tickets to be super tramp tonight.

Hey, what a relief.

All that extra lifting? It's a strain on my body.

Yeah, a phone receiver can be a terribly heavy thing.

Morning,

Andy. Jennifer.

Oh, my God.

It's Howard Cosell.

Somehow you don't look quite as hip in person.

Hardy har har, Johnny.

Check this out.

My feet match my belt.

And that's all class, Steven.

You look like something the Grateful Dead left in Omaha.

It was Albuquerque.

Forget about me. I just ran out of drugs.

Johnny, shouldn't you be on the air?

It's Supertrap day today.

Supertrap.

Day. Today.

Oh, well, let's not forget about Supertrap and all they did for those

people. Then, it's a good shot.

Wait, that's Martin Luther King Jr.

Supertramp. Oh, the band. It's on.

Yeah, well, they deserve a holiday, too.

Johnny. Hey.

Just kidding, just kidding.

I'll take care of the finalists right now.

Venus is in the booth taking care of it. I'm getting prepped.

It's a good thing.

You got a new sponsor for this ad tonight.

And you're paying mutual bucks for this.

Who is it, Herb?

Steve's Used Coffees.

And their slogan is fantastic.

Don't worry. We've cleaned them out already.

Isn't that great?

Wonderful, Herb.

Best sales guy we have.

Hey, wait a minute, Andy. I'm the only sales guy.

Hello there, Cincinnati.

Venus Flatrap here to set the mood and insert his big,

meaty music deep inside your soul.

It's Super Trap Day here at WKRP, when it will be announced shortly upon the

return of Johnny Fever, who will hopefully be back in about 25 minutes or

Until then, here's a couple from the super group, Funky Ass Frankenstein.

Oh, Venus, that was so sexy.

Your voice is like hot chocolate mixed with butter, and it's making me hungry

and turning me on, honey.

Let me ask you a question, baby. Have you ever flown up to Venus?

Because Venus is about to go down on you.

See y 'all fucking slobbery.

Oh, yeah.

It's like you're digging my face.

That just beat my pussy through.

It's good.

That's what you feel so fucking good.

You look so good inside this little pink pussy.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah? Oh, fuck yeah.

Oh, you have such a perfect fucking cut.

Catch anything yet?

Just crabs and a phone call from Mama.

Reminds me of how she owns this station. If we don't turn a profit soon, she's

going to turn this into an all -new station.

Les would like that.

Les would like nothing better than the United States to dig up in Rihanna and

make McCarthy so he could protect us from the communist threat at home.

Les is a dingbat.

Les is the best newsman we've got.

Rock and roll is the best chance the station's got of making a profit.

I know, I know.

Is that true?

Yes, sir, Mr. Carlson.

You should call Mother up.

Oh, dear.

Just let Mother know we've got everything here under control. Oh, my.

Let her know it's a super tramp competition.

There's a real moneymaker on our hands.

Super tramp? Sounds explicit.

I promise you, it's going to penetrate our market share issues and enlarge our

revenues. That sounds really explicit.

You handle Mama, and I'll handle making WKRP profitable.

Hello, Mama?

I'd like to talk to you about penetrating a super tramp and making

enlarged.

Yep, yep, yeah, no worries. We got you covered. Oh, hey, I gotta go.

Andy!

I got a new sale for today's contestant. Well, that's great. Who is it?

Geek Goat Cat Insurance.

We got your cat covered.

Except for fires, dogs, and Koreans.

Wonderful. It's like we never had a sales guy before you.

Wait a minute.

There wasn't a sales guy before me.

Hey, Andy.

How you doing, Bailey?

I'm great, Andy. How are you doing? I'm doing fantastic, thanks to you.

That ticket promotion giveaway I did, yours was brilliant.

Shucks, Andy. It was nothing.

Nothing? And Bailey, you're just too modest.

Tell you what, that's the biggest promotion we've had at WKRP since...

since we dropped those turkeys out of the helicopter for Thanksgiving.

Who does guess that turkeys can't fly?

Big disaster there, but, you know... It was big, and that's the point.

Those poor turkeys, gobbling their way down to Earth.

Until, gobble, gobble... Bailey, you're doing a good job.

I feel a certain promotion coming on for a junior employee.

Les?

Les?

Yes, who is it?

It's Andy, Les. Can I come in?

Andy? Of course you can.

So, what can I do for you, Andy?

Well, Les, I just wanted to come by and tell you what a great job you did with

the ticket promotion giveaway on the news.

I didn't see what any good newsman would do.

Report the news.

And that's why I may even get another Buckeye News Hawk Award.

Or maybe even a silver cow.

Or possibly a real office.

The point is, you did a great job. Now listen, could you help get those tickets

ready with Bailey for this afternoon's giveaway?

I sure can, Andy.

Well, that's great. Thank you very much, Les.

Oh.

You should not spur yourself on those tickets now.

They are hot.

It was a joke, Les.

Oh.

Sure was. That was funny, Andy.

Oh, and Andy?

Yes? You will be replacing that door that you just walked through, right?

Yes, sir.

In fact, I'll get the men's guy on it right now. I don't think I can even

convince him to do it for free.

So, Bailey, what did you do with the concert tickets?

I gave them to you, Lex.

No, Bailey, I never got concert tickets from you. That's why I just asked for

them now, so I can see whether the musician...

Buffer T. Rant is going to perform.

So how's it hanging, Jennifer?

Standing, actually.

Can I take you out to dinner, beautiful?

I don't date a man who thinks plaid is a color.

How about a man who's about to be rich?

I'm about ready to get paid for those two big accounts.

Do you know how much steak I can buy you with that?

Herb, I only dine on Kobe beef.

You're more of a hamburger helper, cheeseburger macaroni casserole.

Meat is meat, Jennifer.

Ah, what the hell. I don't have anything better to do.

Wanna fuck, baby?

Yeah, you wanna fuck me now? Mm -hmm.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. This is so good right there.

Oh, yeah.

It feels really good.

So good.

They stayed for a long time.

I said, I love you.

So good.

Oh, my God.

Tighter. Oh, God.

She is so good. Yeah.

Love it.

Yeah, why don't you get up here so I can fucking ride your cock? Yeah. Yeah,

whatever.

Ugh.

Yes.

Oh my god, yeah

Fucking good.

Oh, God. No, no, no. Let me like that.

I'm gonna make you cum.

Oh my god, I want you to cum so bad.

God, come on. I'm gonna make you cum bad.

Yeah, yeah.

That was so bad.

I want you to cum all over my dirty little asshole.

Yeah, cum all over my fucking ass.

Oh my god, yeah.

Fucking dirty little asshole.

Oh, yeah, I can feel it.

Wow.

What's so important? Less than I really... Bailey lost the concert

What?