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Synchro: arrow, mpm
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www.sub-way.fr / www.seriessub.com
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00:00:34,413 --> 00:00:38,329
Mkay, so now the computer
will type a command bar.
4
00:00:39,114 --> 00:00:40,737
Mkay, and we type in
5
00:00:40,862 --> 00:00:43,584
"x" equal "y" plus one.
6
00:00:44,417 --> 00:00:47,430
Mkay, and then it says
we hit command "y"
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00:00:47,555 --> 00:00:49,840
to bring up the menu screen.
8
00:00:50,665 --> 00:00:52,635
Oh, man.
You've got to be kidding me.
9
00:00:53,899 --> 00:00:55,766
Goddamn japs are everywhere.
10
00:00:56,807 --> 00:01:00,351
Mkay, now, right click
on menu item "equate all"
11
00:01:00,614 --> 00:01:03,279
and type in input "y".
12
00:01:03,695 --> 00:01:06,941
- Dude. Are you on America's side?
- No, I'm on the Japanese side.
13
00:01:07,491 --> 00:01:09,018
Who just shot me?
14
00:01:09,456 --> 00:01:13,406
Mkay, let's see.
A right click in the upper right...
15
00:01:14,845 --> 00:01:16,618
But then what the hell...
16
00:01:17,230 --> 00:01:19,923
Mkay, kids. I'm gonna need to get
some clarification on this.
17
00:01:20,048 --> 00:01:23,042
Just keep entering the calculations.
I'll be right back.
18
00:01:24,332 --> 00:01:26,454
Oh, dude!
I wish I had a real flame-thrower.
19
00:01:26,579 --> 00:01:28,173
It works awesome on japs!
20
00:01:29,303 --> 00:01:31,018
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
21
00:01:32,446 --> 00:01:34,685
Stan, we have got a big problem!
22
00:01:34,810 --> 00:01:37,314
- Dude, what?
- There's vampires in the school!
23
00:01:37,439 --> 00:01:39,247
- What?
- Vampires! I seen 'em!
24
00:01:39,372 --> 00:01:41,434
Dude!
Who's using the flak jacket cheat?
25
00:01:42,039 --> 00:01:43,707
Not a cheat if you rank up!
26
00:01:45,112 --> 00:01:47,004
There's a vampire on the loose.
27
00:01:47,129 --> 00:01:50,191
Then Katie Gelson was hanging out
with him. And now she's a vampire, too!
28
00:01:50,541 --> 00:01:52,236
There's no such thing as vampires.
29
00:01:52,722 --> 00:01:54,721
But there is!
You guys gotta believe me!
30
00:01:54,846 --> 00:01:56,952
First, there was{\ just} a couple,
but now{\ it's like} they're growing.
31
00:01:57,077 --> 00:01:59,033
They have fangs
and drink blood and everything!
32
00:01:59,216 --> 00:02:01,367
All right. You go document
the vampires' movements
33
00:02:01,492 --> 00:02:04,914
- so we know what their intentions are.
- Really? You think that's best?
34
00:02:05,269 --> 00:02:07,376
- Yeah, now get outta here.
- All right!
35
00:02:08,442 --> 00:02:11,530
If I don't make it back,
tell my mom what happened to me.
36
00:02:13,940 --> 00:02:16,066
You got powned, bébé. You jap bitch!
37
00:02:19,995 --> 00:02:22,798
Isn't this cool?
This time of day nobody's in the gym.
38
00:02:22,923 --> 00:02:26,174
We should make this one of our official
South Park vampire's club hangouts.
39
00:02:26,299 --> 00:02:28,920
That's an awesome new coat, Mike.
Looks totally badass.
40
00:02:29,045 --> 00:02:30,928
Don't call me Mike.
My name is Vampir now.
41
00:02:31,053 --> 00:02:33,787
- Oh, that's cool.
- I'm gonna change my name to Vladimir.
42
00:02:33,912 --> 00:02:35,779
You can't. It's too close to Vampir.
43
00:02:39,026 --> 00:02:40,262
12:32 p.m.
44
00:02:40,512 --> 00:02:42,663
Vampires meeting
in the school gymnasium.
45
00:02:42,788 --> 00:02:44,913
Leader appears to be a fifth grader.
46
00:02:45,265 --> 00:02:48,036
You know that girl Bella in "twilight"?
I think I'm like her.
47
00:02:48,161 --> 00:02:50,669
I'm a psi vampire.
Do you like these sparkles I got?
48
00:02:51,507 --> 00:02:53,657
Annie Bartlett is a psi vampire.
49
00:02:54,092 --> 00:02:56,000
I'm more a sanguinarian vampire.
50
00:02:56,125 --> 00:02:58,739
In that I rely more on the life
force energy, per se.
51
00:02:58,864 --> 00:03:00,904
I'm gonna be a hybrid vampire.
52
00:03:01,029 --> 00:03:03,140
Both psi and sanguinarian.
53
00:03:03,736 --> 00:03:06,476
That's Ryan Ellis.
Looks like they've gotten to him, too.
54
00:03:06,794 --> 00:03:09,133
Lunchtime's almost over.
Should we drink some more blood?
55
00:03:09,258 --> 00:03:10,102
Cool!
56
00:03:10,227 --> 00:03:12,398
In that I think it's time
for us to feed, per se.
57
00:03:15,404 --> 00:03:17,530
Oh, God. I think
they're gonna drink blood now!
58
00:03:17,901 --> 00:03:20,543
They've got some kind of chalice
and they're...
59
00:03:24,103 --> 00:03:26,169
It's the Big Texas Butters show!
60
00:03:26,294 --> 00:03:28,935
And now here is Big Texas Butters!
61
00:03:29,170 --> 00:03:30,525
Why howdy there, partners!
62
00:03:30,650 --> 00:03:33,939
I'm Big Texas Butters
and this here's my horse toast.
63
00:03:34,253 --> 00:03:35,649
Happy trails
64
00:03:35,899 --> 00:03:37,202
to you!
65
00:03:40,774 --> 00:03:42,136
What are you doing?
66
00:03:42,692 --> 00:03:44,425
Get back! You stay back!
67
00:03:45,594 --> 00:03:49,185
The body of Christ compels you!
The body of Christ compels you!
68
00:03:55,025 --> 00:03:57,832
That kid was really scared of us.
That's true, Bloodrayne.
69
00:03:57,957 --> 00:04:00,683
People are going to be frightened of us
because they don't understand
70
00:04:00,808 --> 00:04:03,533
- our ways, per se.
- Yeah, we're cool!
71
00:04:07,472 --> 00:04:09,985
What the hell are those kids doing?
72
00:04:10,220 --> 00:04:12,369
Why are they dressing
like that all of a sudden?
73
00:04:12,494 --> 00:04:14,240
Are they trying to be goth?
74
00:04:14,471 --> 00:04:15,821
They're vamp.
75
00:04:16,266 --> 00:04:19,307
They wear plastic fangs
and drink freakin' clamato juice.
76
00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:23,387
But they can't dress like that.
That's our style!
77
00:04:23,841 --> 00:04:26,972
Tommy Petros is thinking
he might wanna be a vamp kid, too.
78
00:04:27,097 --> 00:04:29,590
- Tommy Petros, is he cool?
- Yeah, he's cool enough.
79
00:04:29,715 --> 00:04:30,715
All right.
80
00:04:31,450 --> 00:04:34,331
So all of a sudden you
Justin and Britney wannabes think
81
00:04:34,456 --> 00:04:36,191
it's cool to dress like us?
82
00:04:37,239 --> 00:04:40,875
We dress the way our souls feel.
To express the darkness, per se.
83
00:04:41,471 --> 00:04:43,031
Aren't you Mike Mckowski?
84
00:04:43,743 --> 00:04:46,035
That's Vampir Mckowski now.
85
00:04:46,791 --> 00:04:49,998
You kids need to all go put
your freaking banana republic clothes
86
00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:51,371
back on right now.
87
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,584
We're just as dark as you guys.
Maybe darker.
88
00:04:54,355 --> 00:04:56,819
Really. Do you guys even smoke?
89
00:04:57,249 --> 00:04:59,168
Of course not.
Smoking's bad for you.
90
00:04:59,293 --> 00:05:00,256
Yeah!
91
00:05:00,665 --> 00:05:01,999
Oh, my God.
92
00:05:02,463 --> 00:05:05,346
You know, you guys are really
giving off a negative human energy.
93
00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:07,848
We prefer to take our darkness
somewhere else, per se.
94
00:05:08,216 --> 00:05:10,267
All right, count fagula.
You go do that.
95
00:05:17,662 --> 00:05:20,636
Mom! Mom, I gotta tell you something!
You're not gonna believe it!
96
00:05:20,761 --> 00:05:23,694
Not now. Your father wants to have
a talk with you in the kitchen.
97
00:05:23,819 --> 00:05:25,153
He is not happy.
98
00:05:25,685 --> 00:05:27,500
What I'd do this time?
99
00:05:27,625 --> 00:05:29,307
You just march on in there.
100
00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:30,798
Oh, jeez.
101
00:05:35,617 --> 00:05:37,170
You see this, Butters.
102
00:05:37,295 --> 00:05:39,779
It's a glass of milk
I poured for myself.
103
00:05:40,363 --> 00:05:41,620
And you see this?
104
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,526
It's hamburger helper.
105
00:05:45,570 --> 00:05:48,592
Now, would you mind telling me
what hamburger helper is doing
106
00:05:48,717 --> 00:05:49,931
in this glass of milk?
107
00:05:50,746 --> 00:05:53,769
Why is hamburger helper
in a glass of milk, Butters?
108
00:05:54,517 --> 00:05:55,967
I have no idea, sir.
109
00:05:56,404 --> 00:05:57,576
I'll tell you why!
110
00:05:57,701 --> 00:06:00,881
Our pantry is always kept
organized alphabetically.
111
00:06:01,225 --> 00:06:03,698
But somebody put
the hamburger helper
112
00:06:03,823 --> 00:06:06,176
where the nestle quick
is supposed to go!
113
00:06:07,364 --> 00:06:10,409
I'm sorry, dad. It's just I've been
really preoccupied lately.
114
00:06:10,534 --> 00:06:14,163
- See, there's these kids at school...
- What keeps a family together?
115
00:06:14,893 --> 00:06:16,290
A well-organized pantry.
116
00:06:16,642 --> 00:06:17,550
That's right!
117
00:06:17,675 --> 00:06:20,212
If you keep putting food back
under the wrong letter,
118
00:06:20,563 --> 00:06:22,006
it all goes wrong!
119
00:06:22,348 --> 00:06:25,967
Now you will reorganize this entire
pantry and you will do it right.
120
00:06:26,300 --> 00:06:28,102
Okay, but dad,
you gotta listen to me.
121
00:06:28,227 --> 00:06:30,055
Kids at school
are starting to change.
122
00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,833
You do it right now
or you're going to be grounded.
123
00:06:32,958 --> 00:06:34,010
You got that?
124
00:06:34,245 --> 00:06:35,300
Yes, sir.
125
00:06:38,285 --> 00:06:39,196
Jeez.
126
00:06:39,321 --> 00:06:41,141
Nobody will even listen to me.
127
00:06:41,593 --> 00:06:44,446
It's like nobody even cares
there's vampires at the school.
128
00:06:44,869 --> 00:06:47,504
I try to help and all I ever do
is get hollered at.
129
00:06:48,495 --> 00:06:50,841
I'll bet vampires
never get hollered at.
130
00:06:51,242 --> 00:06:53,694
Vampires just get to do
whatever they want.
131
00:06:58,828 --> 00:07:00,752
All mortals share a soft repose.
132
00:07:01,055 --> 00:07:02,985
My soul doth dreadful vigils keep,
133
00:07:03,110 --> 00:07:05,745
more keen than
which hell scarcely knows.
134
00:07:06,174 --> 00:07:07,508
What is that kid doing?
135
00:07:09,138 --> 00:07:12,431
Oh, Jesus. Oh, God.
Butters, what are you doing?
136
00:07:24,126 --> 00:07:25,253
I'm Butters.
137
00:07:26,897 --> 00:07:27,821
So?
138
00:07:29,258 --> 00:07:31,895
Oh, creatures of the night,
I seek audience to engage with thee
139
00:07:32,020 --> 00:07:34,068
in unholy darkness and thus do,
140
00:07:34,193 --> 00:07:36,604
and thus do unto your bidding.
141
00:07:38,673 --> 00:07:39,706
What?
142
00:07:40,782 --> 00:07:42,355
I wanna be a vampire.
143
00:07:43,612 --> 00:07:45,421
You're not cool enough
to be one of us.
144
00:07:45,898 --> 00:07:46,959
Yeah, I know.
145
00:07:47,084 --> 00:07:50,417
But... I think I would make
a really good vampire if you just...
146
00:07:50,898 --> 00:07:52,471
just give me the opportunity.
147
00:07:53,458 --> 00:07:54,590
We'll think about it.
148
00:07:54,715 --> 00:07:56,933
Go get us some sodas out of the
pop machine in the commons.
149
00:07:58,026 --> 00:08:00,478
- Anything else?
- I want some cheetos.
150
00:08:00,895 --> 00:08:03,232
Sodas and cheetos!
I'll be right back.
151
00:08:10,519 --> 00:08:11,572
Where'd it go?
152
00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:15,077
- You see where it went?
- It's {\right }over there by those vampire kids.
153
00:08:17,979 --> 00:08:18,979
What?
154
00:08:20,627 --> 00:08:23,421
We aren't vampire kids,
we're freaking goth!
155
00:08:24,195 --> 00:08:26,963
Whatever, Dracula. Why don't you turn
into a bat or something?
156
00:08:27,657 --> 00:08:28,772
So lame.
157
00:08:29,347 --> 00:08:31,359
So... lame.
158
00:08:31,484 --> 00:08:33,582
You guys, I do not want
to be grouped in
159
00:08:33,707 --> 00:08:36,209
with the douchy little vampire kids.
160
00:08:36,334 --> 00:08:38,318
So lame.
161
00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:42,441
See? Isn't it cool back here?
It's all dark and isolated.
162
00:08:42,566 --> 00:08:44,709
This would be a great place
for a vampire meeting!
163
00:08:44,834 --> 00:08:47,424
Get out of our space,
you little twerps!
164
00:08:48,417 --> 00:08:51,238
More preppy straight-a
students turning into vampires.
165
00:08:51,363 --> 00:08:53,167
What the hell is going on?
166
00:09:08,798 --> 00:09:10,375
I've done what you asked.
167
00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:12,853
A case of Dr. Pepper
and cherry twizzlers.
168
00:09:12,978 --> 00:09:16,137
Who are you gonna give this to?
I mean, vampires can't eat people food.
169
00:09:16,544 --> 00:09:17,629
You have done well.
170
00:09:17,754 --> 00:09:20,371
Are you ready to become
one of us, per se?
171
00:09:21,234 --> 00:09:22,420
Yeah, I guess.
172
00:09:22,776 --> 00:09:25,919
Are you sure? Because once you're
in south park vampire society,
173
00:09:26,044 --> 00:09:27,543
you can't ever leave.
174
00:09:30,098 --> 00:09:32,172
I'm sick of being pushed around.
175
00:09:32,297 --> 00:09:34,740
By my dad, by kids at school.
176
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:37,868
Then it is time
for your transformation, per se.
177
00:09:38,654 --> 00:09:39,840
Let it begin!
178
00:09:43,305 --> 00:09:45,303
This way.
Prepare thyself.
179
00:10:12,796 --> 00:10:14,825
And now you shall drink
vampire blood
180
00:10:14,950 --> 00:10:17,744
and your transformation
will be complete, per se.
181
00:10:19,935 --> 00:10:22,285
With this thy transformation
is done!
182
00:10:24,931 --> 00:10:26,157
That tastes awful!
183
00:10:27,866 --> 00:10:28,880
It is finished!
184
00:10:29,169 --> 00:10:32,519
Welcome, Butters,
to the South Park society of vampires.
185
00:10:44,799 --> 00:10:47,132
There you are!
Do you know what time it is?
186
00:10:47,257 --> 00:10:48,448
Where have you been?
187
00:10:48,856 --> 00:10:50,415
What have you done to your hair?
188
00:10:51,884 --> 00:10:53,446
We are talking to you!
189
00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:55,698
Explain yourself, mister.
190
00:10:56,283 --> 00:10:59,433
I no longer need to explain
anything to you, father.
191
00:10:59,587 --> 00:11:01,524
- What on earth...
- That does it!
192
00:11:01,649 --> 00:11:03,915
You are grounded for two weeks,
you got that?
193
00:11:04,561 --> 00:11:06,140
You can't ground me.
194
00:11:06,265 --> 00:11:08,326
For I am neither living nor dead.
195
00:11:08,451 --> 00:11:11,301
How can they ground
that which is ungroundable?
196
00:11:15,222 --> 00:11:18,308
All right. It don't know what's gotten
into you, mister, but you're gonna...
197
00:11:23,086 --> 00:11:24,742
I am going to my room now.
198
00:11:24,867 --> 00:11:26,799
For I must slumber, per se.
199
00:11:34,468 --> 00:11:38,276
Now kids, I understand that you are
very into this vampire thing,
200
00:11:38,401 --> 00:11:40,461
but I don't want to see
it get out of hand.
201
00:11:40,586 --> 00:11:42,034
You kids need to understand
202
00:11:42,159 --> 00:11:44,769
that your new little fad
is scary to some.
203
00:11:47,014 --> 00:11:48,447
Oh, my God.
204
00:11:48,572 --> 00:11:50,640
You've got
the wrong flippin' people!
205
00:11:50,765 --> 00:11:53,132
We aren't vampires.
206
00:11:53,351 --> 00:11:55,561
I know that you aren't
really vampires.
207
00:11:55,686 --> 00:11:57,687
And I appreciate
that you want to be cool
208
00:11:57,812 --> 00:12:00,388
because vampires are
the "in" thing right now.
209
00:12:00,550 --> 00:12:01,973
We aren't trying to be popular!
210
00:12:02,134 --> 00:12:03,977
But just make sure
that this new little trend
211
00:12:04,102 --> 00:12:05,483
doesn't become a distraction.
212
00:12:05,608 --> 00:12:07,980
Here's a couple more,
principal Victoria, mkay.
213
00:12:08,534 --> 00:12:09,940
Oh, no, are we in trouble?
214
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:12,902
I was just telling your friends
about what I expect...
215
00:12:13,062 --> 00:12:15,279
We aren't friends.
216
00:12:15,812 --> 00:12:16,966
Don't worry, ma'am.
217
00:12:17,091 --> 00:12:19,247
As I was just explaining
to my new minions,
218
00:12:19,372 --> 00:12:22,660
vampires are actually very spiritual
and deep beings, per se.
219
00:12:25,685 --> 00:12:28,077
Allison Mertz is a vampire kid, now?
220
00:12:28,259 --> 00:12:30,126
This thing isn't going to stop.
221
00:12:30,318 --> 00:12:31,630
Let's just face it.
222
00:12:31,755 --> 00:12:33,251
They bogarted our style.
223
00:12:33,376 --> 00:12:35,929
Everyone's gonna think we're
trying to be butthole vampires.
224
00:12:36,054 --> 00:12:39,261
Now we might go to the frickin' Gap
and buy normal clothes.
225
00:12:44,376 --> 00:12:48,309
Well, at least nobody can
refer to us as vampire kids now.
226
00:12:50,830 --> 00:12:52,143
It went this way?
227
00:12:52,268 --> 00:12:54,830
Yeah, it's over there by the fat girl,
the big nose kid, the
228
00:12:54,955 --> 00:12:56,945
the midget and the kid
with pock marks on his face.
229
00:13:00,114 --> 00:13:02,010
So we're back to that, are we?
230
00:13:03,998 --> 00:13:06,608
Let's get out
of these freakin' gap clothes.
231
00:13:14,155 --> 00:13:15,257
Sorry, Eric.
232
00:13:15,568 --> 00:13:19,696
But I'm a vampire now, and I can
no longer survive on human food.
233
00:13:20,346 --> 00:13:23,699
And if someone must die so that
I can feed, I choose thee.
234
00:13:32,146 --> 00:13:35,435
Wonder what side I'm supposed
to do it on. Probably doesn't matter.
235
00:13:42,729 --> 00:13:43,898
I can't do it!
236
00:13:44,439 --> 00:13:45,773
I can't do it!
237
00:13:46,144 --> 00:13:48,638
Dude, gross. You got spit
all over my neck. Mom!
238
00:13:48,763 --> 00:13:51,053
- Butters just gave me a hickey!
- I'm so hungry,
239
00:13:51,178 --> 00:13:53,860
but just remembering
about how that blood tasted before...
240
00:13:53,985 --> 00:13:55,743
Blood is all clammy and tomatoey.
241
00:13:55,868 --> 00:13:57,459
It makes me want to...
242
00:13:59,016 --> 00:14:01,135
- Dude!
- Are you all right, sweetie?
243
00:14:08,302 --> 00:14:09,608
What's going on?
244
00:14:10,043 --> 00:14:12,912
Well, Mom, apparently Butters is gay,
finds me very attractive
245
00:14:13,037 --> 00:14:16,157
and confused about his sexual identity.
Puked on my floor.
246
00:14:16,395 --> 00:14:17,395
Oh, dear.
247
00:14:23,537 --> 00:14:27,514
I walked into the cafeteria today,
Rebeca Miller and Phillip Rust
248
00:14:27,639 --> 00:14:29,932
were dressed like vampires
drinking clamato juice
249
00:14:30,057 --> 00:14:31,944
with four kids
from the football team.
250
00:14:32,069 --> 00:14:32,999
Jesus.
251
00:14:33,391 --> 00:14:36,688
It's like there's more vampire kids
every freakin' day.
252
00:14:36,813 --> 00:14:39,215
Why is this happening?
I mean, why now?
253
00:14:39,566 --> 00:14:40,708
Doesn't matter why.
254
00:14:40,833 --> 00:14:42,182
Pretty soon the whole school
255
00:14:42,307 --> 00:14:45,512
is going to be an endless hive of
conformist {\happy-go-lucky }vampire wannabes.
256
00:14:45,940 --> 00:14:49,480
It seems like that preppy
Mike McKowski kid started all this.
257
00:14:49,605 --> 00:14:51,559
Maybe he's the way to stopping it.
258
00:14:51,813 --> 00:14:52,977
What do you mean?
259
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,205
I mean,
260
00:14:54,330 --> 00:14:58,344
what do you do when you want to change
vampires back to normal?
261
00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:01,310
You get rid of the head vampire.
262
00:15:08,782 --> 00:15:10,856
Does your mom know you took her car?
263
00:15:11,124 --> 00:15:12,273
Do I care?
264
00:15:13,602 --> 00:15:15,250
Okay. This is probably good enough.
265
00:15:15,578 --> 00:15:17,128
Yeah, pull over here.
266
00:15:23,613 --> 00:15:25,064
Please!
What do you want?
267
00:15:25,189 --> 00:15:26,052
Let me go!
268
00:15:28,058 --> 00:15:29,481
What should we do with him?
269
00:15:29,994 --> 00:15:31,288
If he's a vampire,
270
00:15:31,413 --> 00:15:33,601
I guess we should drive
a stake through his heart.
271
00:15:35,048 --> 00:15:36,296
No, I'm not a vampire.
272
00:15:36,421 --> 00:15:38,065
I'm not a vampire!
273
00:15:38,793 --> 00:15:41,289
- What's that?
- I'm not really a vampire!
274
00:15:41,414 --> 00:15:43,222
You're not really a vampire?
275
00:15:43,347 --> 00:15:44,282
Really?
276
00:15:44,407 --> 00:15:45,947
I'm so freaking shocked.
277
00:15:47,914 --> 00:15:49,280
If we get the right packaging,
278
00:15:49,405 --> 00:15:51,834
we can just fedex him
somewhere far away.
279
00:15:51,959 --> 00:15:54,032
How about we send him to
transylvania?
280
00:15:54,499 --> 00:15:55,665
He'd probably see it
281
00:15:55,790 --> 00:15:58,459
as something to brag about some day
to his little vampire buddies.
282
00:15:58,948 --> 00:16:00,569
If we're gonna send him somewhere
283
00:16:00,694 --> 00:16:04,199
it should be the most horrible,
most miserable place on Earth.
284
00:16:06,158 --> 00:16:07,318
Scottsdale!
285
00:16:12,739 --> 00:16:15,089
We just got a call
from Mrs. Cartman!
286
00:16:16,793 --> 00:16:18,915
Unbelievable!
He's locked the door!
287
00:16:20,331 --> 00:16:21,974
Butters! This is your father!
288
00:16:22,099 --> 00:16:25,696
Explain why you snuck into another boy's
bedroom and gave him a hickey!
289
00:16:28,652 --> 00:16:31,302
Butters, you will open this door
right now!
290
00:16:32,082 --> 00:16:33,932
What have I done to myself?
291
00:16:34,390 --> 00:16:37,540
I should have known I wouldn't have
the stomach to be a vampire.
292
00:16:38,369 --> 00:16:39,752
I'm so hungry.
293
00:16:40,006 --> 00:16:42,876
Butters, you have five seconds
to unlock this door.
294
00:16:43,001 --> 00:16:44,001
One.
295
00:16:44,311 --> 00:16:45,311
Two.
296
00:16:58,022 --> 00:16:59,022
Hey, Dad.
297
00:17:00,225 --> 00:17:03,149
Butters, did you get gay
with one of your schoolmates tonight?
298
00:17:03,531 --> 00:17:04,656
I have to eat.
299
00:17:04,781 --> 00:17:07,111
But I can't do it.
I'm getting weak.
300
00:17:07,463 --> 00:17:10,085
All right. Now you listen
and you listen good.
301
00:17:10,333 --> 00:17:14,889
Until you stop behaving this way,
you are not going the leave this room!
302
00:17:15,014 --> 00:17:16,497
Do you understand?
303
00:17:23,249 --> 00:17:24,945
I know now what I have to do.
304
00:17:28,502 --> 00:17:30,954
Steven, what has happened
to our boy?
305
00:17:31,863 --> 00:17:33,813
He's become something, Linda.
306
00:17:34,481 --> 00:17:35,538
Something
307
00:17:36,050 --> 00:17:37,709
that we cannot ground.
308
00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:48,623
I just don't get it
309
00:17:48,748 --> 00:17:51,322
We sent the head vampire
to Scotsdale.
310
00:17:51,447 --> 00:17:55,180
But still more and more kids
are dressing up like vampires.
311
00:17:55,305 --> 00:17:58,789
It must not have been what causing it.
It must be something else.
312
00:17:59,056 --> 00:18:00,448
You're gonna order any food
313
00:18:00,573 --> 00:18:02,555
or just sit there
and drink coffee all night.
314
00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:04,169
Leave us alone.
315
00:18:04,330 --> 00:18:06,767
Bad enough if I always get stuck
with you goth kids.
316
00:18:06,892 --> 00:18:09,174
Now I've goth kids
in my entire section.
317
00:18:12,190 --> 00:18:15,179
They aren't goth,
they are douches little vampire kids.
318
00:18:15,669 --> 00:18:17,141
Looks the same to me.
319
00:18:17,266 --> 00:18:19,528
I bet they aren't even drinking
coffee.
320
00:18:19,653 --> 00:18:21,841
No, they said they were
to young to drink caffeine,
321
00:18:21,966 --> 00:18:23,460
so they have an orange juice.
322
00:18:27,049 --> 00:18:28,156
Let's go over there
323
00:18:28,281 --> 00:18:31,238
and tell them they are not taking
their legend from us too.
324
00:18:31,644 --> 00:18:32,582
Forget it!
325
00:18:32,707 --> 00:18:34,017
It's over, all right?
326
00:18:34,142 --> 00:18:36,964
There's too many of them now.
We can't stop them.
327
00:18:37,198 --> 00:18:38,510
Let's just face it.
328
00:18:38,635 --> 00:18:40,585
The freakin' vampires beat us.
329
00:18:41,384 --> 00:18:42,499
Maybe not.
330
00:18:44,188 --> 00:18:47,338
Did you say you're trying
to get rid of the vampires?
331
00:18:47,957 --> 00:18:49,282
I want to help you.
332
00:18:49,592 --> 00:18:51,006
Get away, douchebag.
333
00:18:51,215 --> 00:18:55,012
Some legends say that if you
destroy the vampire's lair,
334
00:18:55,172 --> 00:18:57,355
the vampires will go back to being
human again.
335
00:18:57,480 --> 00:18:58,865
What are you talking about?
336
00:18:58,990 --> 00:19:00,173
I can take you
337
00:19:00,298 --> 00:19:03,721
to the place where kids
are being transformed into vampires.
338
00:19:09,274 --> 00:19:11,527
Hot Topic?
When did this open?
339
00:19:11,958 --> 00:19:15,790
Two weeks ago.
It used to be a banana republic.
340
00:19:16,513 --> 00:19:17,447
Of course.
341
00:19:17,572 --> 00:19:20,244
Freakin' Hot Topic.
That explains everything.
342
00:19:20,501 --> 00:19:22,003
How did we not figure that out?
343
00:19:22,128 --> 00:19:24,861
Of course a new hot topic
must have come to town.
344
00:19:25,873 --> 00:19:28,723
Well, I think we all know
what has to be done.
345
00:19:30,051 --> 00:19:31,301
Let's get to it.
346
00:19:45,976 --> 00:19:47,737
What the hell are you doing?
347
00:19:47,862 --> 00:19:49,774
You should probably get out of here.
348
00:19:58,511 --> 00:20:01,858
- What the hell are they doing?
- They're putting an end it to.
349
00:20:14,329 --> 00:20:15,509
Mom!
Dad!
350
00:20:16,023 --> 00:20:18,095
- I've changed back!
- What?
351
00:20:18,425 --> 00:20:20,984
Goth kids burnt down the Hot Topic
and sure enough!
352
00:20:21,109 --> 00:20:23,979
Soon as they did, I tried eating
a hot dog and it tasted good!
353
00:20:24,104 --> 00:20:26,650
My vampire teeth even fell out
when I bit into it!
354
00:20:26,775 --> 00:20:28,164
I'm human again!
355
00:20:28,289 --> 00:20:30,606
We have no idea
what you're talking about,
356
00:20:30,768 --> 00:20:32,090
but we're glad you're home!
357
00:20:32,215 --> 00:20:35,025
That's right, son.
There's only one thing I care about.
358
00:20:35,150 --> 00:20:36,270
What's that, Dad?
359
00:20:36,395 --> 00:20:40,655
Would you mind telling me
why there is rice-a-roni in my coffee?
360
00:20:42,758 --> 00:20:44,573
Butters, are you grounded!
361
00:20:45,748 --> 00:20:46,953
Dangit!
362
00:20:48,773 --> 00:20:50,229
It worked, Linda.
363
00:20:50,602 --> 00:20:52,737
Our son is groundable once more.
364
00:20:56,609 --> 00:21:00,249
Fellow students, over the past weeks
there's been a lot of confusion
365
00:21:00,374 --> 00:21:02,152
and so we have asked
for this assembly
366
00:21:02,277 --> 00:21:06,310
to clarify the difference
between goth kids and vampire kids.
367
00:21:06,737 --> 00:21:08,644
Let us now, make it
abundantly clear...
368
00:21:09,032 --> 00:21:13,387
If you hate life, truly hate the sun,
and need to smoke and drink coffee,
369
00:21:13,512 --> 00:21:14,744
you are goth.
370
00:21:15,546 --> 00:21:18,493
If, however, you like dressing
in black because it's fun,
371
00:21:19,067 --> 00:21:21,603
enjoy putting sparkles on your cheeks
and following the occult
372
00:21:21,728 --> 00:21:23,929
while avoiding things
that are bad for your health,
373
00:21:24,054 --> 00:21:27,816
then you are most likely
a douchebag vampire-wannabe boner.
374
00:21:27,949 --> 00:21:30,518
Because anybody who thinks
they are actually a vampire
375
00:21:30,643 --> 00:21:32,345
is freaking retarded.
376
00:21:37,627 --> 00:21:38,685
All of you.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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