Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:02:56,221 --> 00:02:59,457
I thought aboutstarting at the beginning.
2
00:03:02,864 --> 00:03:04,895
But that's nothow I remember it.
3
00:03:12,936 --> 00:03:14,205
It's all a series of
4
00:03:15,206 --> 00:03:16,207
fragments.
5
00:03:18,743 --> 00:03:20,345
Repetitions.
6
00:03:22,781 --> 00:03:25,082
Pattern formations.
7
00:03:47,071 --> 00:03:49,374
When there are nowords for the pain...
8
00:03:54,446 --> 00:03:57,248
let your imaginationchange what you know.
9
00:03:59,484 --> 00:04:01,186
Conglomerates.
10
00:04:01,219 --> 00:04:03,121
Movement of landin the freedom of water.
11
00:04:06,056 --> 00:04:07,991
A ring around a rock is luck.
12
00:04:09,194 --> 00:04:11,028
Smoothedinto a small thing.
13
00:04:12,831 --> 00:04:14,898
Sandstone is soothing and lucid.
14
00:04:14,932 --> 00:04:17,402
Shale, of course, is rational.
15
00:04:17,435 --> 00:04:18,902
Red rock is earth blood.
16
00:04:21,106 --> 00:04:23,006
You believe in blue.
17
00:04:47,432 --> 00:04:51,935
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
18
00:04:52,837 --> 00:04:54,272
Memories...
19
00:04:56,741 --> 00:04:58,075
are stories.
20
00:05:00,512 --> 00:05:03,214
So you better come upwith one you can live with.
21
00:05:22,734 --> 00:05:24,102
Smiley face.
22
00:05:31,342 --> 00:05:32,477
Flower.
23
00:05:44,756 --> 00:05:46,089
Christmas tree.
24
00:06:09,614 --> 00:06:10,615
Stop.
25
00:06:11,783 --> 00:06:13,618
Claudia, go upstairs.
26
00:06:13,651 --> 00:06:14,652
Go!
27
00:06:17,655 --> 00:06:18,656
Move!
28
00:06:25,597 --> 00:06:27,499
You just let me know
when you're finished.
29
00:06:28,199 --> 00:06:29,767
We can do this all night.
30
00:06:40,378 --> 00:06:41,713
Fuck it!
31
00:07:22,387 --> 00:07:24,522
I think it'll feel
nice, Claudia.
32
00:07:24,556 --> 00:07:27,458
I really think it
will. Fix you right up.
33
00:07:29,861 --> 00:07:31,429
Fix you right up.
34
00:07:41,673 --> 00:07:43,007
Sing with me, Belle.
35
00:07:43,041 --> 00:07:45,577
♪ Oh, my darlin' ♪
36
00:07:45,610 --> 00:07:47,378
♪ Oh, my darlin' ♪
37
00:07:47,412 --> 00:07:50,515
♪ Oh, my darlin' Clementine ♪
38
00:07:50,548 --> 00:07:52,817
Come on, Lidia
Belle. Sing with me.
39
00:07:52,850 --> 00:07:54,686
You know all the lyrics.
40
00:07:54,719 --> 00:07:59,290
♪ You're lost
and gone forever ♪
41
00:07:59,324 --> 00:08:01,526
♪ Dreadful sorrow ♪
42
00:08:01,559 --> 00:08:04,729
It was myvoice that left.
43
00:08:08,132 --> 00:08:10,501
Sometimes I thinkit arrived on paper.
44
00:08:11,436 --> 00:08:13,705
I wrote picturesand true things.
45
00:08:13,738 --> 00:08:15,740
Lies interchangeably.
46
00:08:16,641 --> 00:08:19,110
Made me feel like,like someone else.
47
00:08:19,143 --> 00:08:21,479
Oh, for Christ's sake!
48
00:08:21,512 --> 00:08:23,147
I wrotewords to belong to.
49
00:08:23,181 --> 00:08:24,649
That is our daughter!
50
00:08:24,682 --> 00:08:26,284
Not daughter.
51
00:08:27,619 --> 00:08:28,786
To swimmer.
52
00:08:30,188 --> 00:08:31,756
To safety.
53
00:08:31,789 --> 00:08:33,157
To girls.
54
00:08:33,191 --> 00:08:34,759
Make myskin hot.
55
00:08:34,792 --> 00:08:36,060
My head hurt.
56
00:08:36,094 --> 00:08:38,229
My mother. Her hair.
57
00:08:38,896 --> 00:08:40,531
Her scar.
58
00:08:40,565 --> 00:08:42,467
Her stories.
59
00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:45,737
I won a prize
for that story, Belle.
60
00:08:45,770 --> 00:08:47,905
And your daddy
61
00:08:49,607 --> 00:08:53,311
won an art prize
for this drawing.
62
00:08:54,512 --> 00:08:57,415
How gone she was.
63
00:09:02,353 --> 00:09:04,889
And my sister. My adoration.
64
00:09:04,922 --> 00:09:07,425
My sister. My awe.
65
00:09:07,458 --> 00:09:10,762
You look like a bum in that
dumpy sack shirt.
66
00:09:10,795 --> 00:09:12,330
It does nothing for you.
67
00:09:13,231 --> 00:09:14,432
Look at me.
68
00:09:16,067 --> 00:09:18,403
You trying to look like a man?
69
00:09:18,436 --> 00:09:21,406
My sister.Taking everything.
70
00:09:28,346 --> 00:09:30,448
Before you were even born.
71
00:09:58,177 --> 00:09:59,510
In the house.
72
00:10:02,280 --> 00:10:03,715
Alone in my room.
73
00:10:04,716 --> 00:10:06,217
My arms ache.
74
00:10:06,984 --> 00:10:08,386
My sister is gone.
75
00:10:10,388 --> 00:10:12,690
My mother is...
76
00:10:12,724 --> 00:10:13,725
gone.
77
00:10:15,860 --> 00:10:18,496
My father designs houses inthe room next to mine.
78
00:10:18,529 --> 00:10:19,864
He's smoking.
79
00:10:34,779 --> 00:10:35,780
Hey, honey.
80
00:10:45,790 --> 00:10:47,358
Hey.
81
00:10:57,169 --> 00:10:59,003
I wait for five a.m.
82
00:11:01,206 --> 00:11:02,673
I pray
83
00:11:04,209 --> 00:11:05,710
to swim.
84
00:11:20,992 --> 00:11:22,426
My baby girl.
85
00:11:25,930 --> 00:11:27,431
Growing up so fast.
86
00:11:33,704 --> 00:11:34,872
A teenager.
87
00:11:37,276 --> 00:11:38,609
In high school.
88
00:11:39,410 --> 00:11:40,545
I can't believe it.
89
00:11:40,578 --> 00:11:42,346
All right. Line up.
90
00:11:42,380 --> 00:11:45,082
Ladies, weigh in.
You know the drill.
91
00:11:45,117 --> 00:11:47,318
One lick for every
pound you're over.
92
00:11:47,819 --> 00:11:48,853
Torres.
93
00:11:50,521 --> 00:11:51,689
Atta girl.
94
00:12:00,364 --> 00:12:03,701
That's right, there you go.
95
00:12:03,734 --> 00:12:06,205
Reimer. Three pounds.
96
00:12:10,474 --> 00:12:11,843
Faster.
97
00:12:14,745 --> 00:12:16,347
Come on, baby.
98
00:12:16,848 --> 00:12:18,449
Harder!
99
00:12:29,560 --> 00:12:32,864
Yuknavitch.
One for you, freshman.
100
00:12:32,897 --> 00:12:34,632
So we'll make it count.
101
00:12:54,952 --> 00:12:56,387
Go!
102
00:13:07,565 --> 00:13:09,800
How many miles does it take
103
00:13:13,871 --> 00:13:14,939
to swim
104
00:13:19,477 --> 00:13:20,811
to a self?
105
00:13:24,383 --> 00:13:25,583
How
106
00:13:26,083 --> 00:13:27,418
many
107
00:13:27,985 --> 00:13:29,487
fucking
108
00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:31,323
miles?
109
00:13:36,460 --> 00:13:38,297
We set a record!
110
00:13:38,330 --> 00:13:40,731
We set a fucking record!
111
00:13:40,765 --> 00:13:42,200
We areproud to announce
112
00:13:42,234 --> 00:13:44,468
that our 200-yard medleyrelay gold-medal winners
113
00:13:44,502 --> 00:13:46,138
from the FloridaAquatic Swim Team
114
00:13:46,171 --> 00:13:48,572
have achieved the besttime in the entire nation.
115
00:13:48,606 --> 00:13:50,074
Congratulations.
116
00:13:50,108 --> 00:13:51,742
Scouts are watching, seniors.
117
00:14:17,969 --> 00:14:19,870
So you
really want this, huh?
118
00:14:25,977 --> 00:14:27,044
Okay.
119
00:14:46,564 --> 00:14:48,766
You only got a
three-quarter ride.
120
00:14:53,405 --> 00:14:54,839
Hey, if they wanted you,
121
00:14:54,872 --> 00:14:58,176
they would have offered the
whole nine yards, huh?
122
00:15:14,159 --> 00:15:17,561
"We are delighted to offer a
partial scholarship."
123
00:15:19,063 --> 00:15:20,432
Half.
124
00:15:20,465 --> 00:15:22,167
You're better than that.
125
00:15:25,404 --> 00:15:26,837
Last one.
126
00:15:41,153 --> 00:15:43,188
In my head,I swam laps.
127
00:15:45,022 --> 00:15:46,957
Didn't even
get one full ride.
128
00:15:52,230 --> 00:15:53,564
Hey. Don't blame me.
129
00:15:54,765 --> 00:15:56,767
If they don't want you,
then you don't belong there.
130
00:15:56,801 --> 00:15:58,702
I could taste blood.
131
00:15:58,736 --> 00:16:01,139
The answer is no.
132
00:16:02,107 --> 00:16:03,108
Why?
133
00:16:11,216 --> 00:16:12,217
Because he could.
134
00:16:15,387 --> 00:16:16,587
What?
135
00:16:17,222 --> 00:16:18,722
And I was his.
136
00:16:31,103 --> 00:16:33,371
Hey. Look at me.
137
00:16:45,517 --> 00:16:47,051
Look at me.
138
00:16:56,528 --> 00:16:58,296
I only want the best for you.
139
00:17:00,298 --> 00:17:01,333
You know that.
140
00:17:04,569 --> 00:17:06,770
I knewhe could feel it.
141
00:17:07,738 --> 00:17:09,274
That pink muscle.
142
00:17:10,175 --> 00:17:11,176
Pushing
143
00:17:13,278 --> 00:17:14,412
and pushing.
144
00:17:15,946 --> 00:17:17,149
You should all
be out there warming up.
145
00:17:17,182 --> 00:17:18,816
For allthat it's worth.
146
00:17:23,555 --> 00:17:25,357
Hey, Lidia.
147
00:17:27,392 --> 00:17:29,227
Do you need a hand?
148
00:17:29,261 --> 00:17:31,028
I'm a coach from Texas Tech.
149
00:17:32,164 --> 00:17:33,697
I'm excited to meet you.
150
00:17:34,064 --> 00:17:35,065
Let's talk.
151
00:17:35,733 --> 00:17:37,668
Like to have
you on our team.
152
00:17:56,655 --> 00:17:57,855
Yes.
153
00:18:04,094 --> 00:18:06,096
I almost loved her.
154
00:18:12,637 --> 00:18:14,372
Let's go, Belle.
155
00:18:39,830 --> 00:18:42,733
'Cause I know you,
Lidia. I know what you do.
156
00:18:42,766 --> 00:18:45,637
And it is disgusting.
Disgusting! You hear me?
157
00:18:45,670 --> 00:18:47,706
It's fucking disgusting, Lidia.
158
00:18:47,738 --> 00:18:50,275
You should be
ashamed of your--
159
00:18:53,678 --> 00:18:54,979
Lidia!
160
00:18:58,683 --> 00:19:00,017
This is control.
161
00:19:00,884 --> 00:19:03,455
I am controlling myself.
162
00:19:06,458 --> 00:19:08,759
You don't know how far I can go.
163
00:19:26,977 --> 00:19:30,781
My bedroom holdsthe wet and the dark of my body.
164
00:19:34,452 --> 00:19:36,053
It smells like my sweat...
165
00:19:37,622 --> 00:19:38,822
and chlorine.
166
00:19:51,736 --> 00:19:52,836
Hey.
167
00:19:52,870 --> 00:19:54,239
Can't sleep, huh?
168
00:19:55,005 --> 00:19:56,608
Yeah. Me neither.
169
00:20:07,185 --> 00:20:08,486
Come here.
170
00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:09,521
I want to talk to you.
171
00:20:15,059 --> 00:20:18,129
Listen. I'm sorry I've
been so hard on you lately.
172
00:20:20,231 --> 00:20:21,232
I guess I just
173
00:20:23,033 --> 00:20:25,136
really worry about
you out there.
174
00:20:27,172 --> 00:20:30,141
Things are gonna be different
when you go to college.
175
00:20:31,041 --> 00:20:33,144
I want you to listen to me.
176
00:20:33,178 --> 00:20:36,247
He narratedwhat boys would do to me.
177
00:20:37,415 --> 00:20:39,150
How they would puttheir dirty hands
178
00:20:39,184 --> 00:20:41,852
up my skirt and finger-fuck me.
179
00:20:42,754 --> 00:20:43,954
Fondle my tits.
180
00:20:47,692 --> 00:20:48,892
Suck them.
181
00:20:50,894 --> 00:20:53,365
How disgusting boys would be.
182
00:20:55,266 --> 00:20:56,900
Their hands,
183
00:20:56,934 --> 00:20:59,104
their hips wanting in and up.
184
00:20:59,804 --> 00:21:01,106
And their dicks.
185
00:21:02,273 --> 00:21:03,375
And his.
186
00:21:04,074 --> 00:21:05,876
Me sitting next to him,
187
00:21:07,077 --> 00:21:08,879
feeling the heat of him
188
00:21:10,047 --> 00:21:11,483
without even looking.
189
00:22:11,109 --> 00:22:12,644
What you doing out here?
190
00:22:19,784 --> 00:22:21,719
What's the matter with you, huh?
191
00:22:26,224 --> 00:22:28,091
I want you to know that, um,
192
00:22:32,497 --> 00:22:33,498
I love you.
193
00:22:41,473 --> 00:22:42,474
Huh.
194
00:22:50,915 --> 00:22:52,417
You're a fucking whore.
195
00:23:00,859 --> 00:23:02,993
You have something to say to me?
196
00:23:03,561 --> 00:23:04,562
Huh?
197
00:23:11,436 --> 00:23:13,905
Fuck you,
motherfucker.
198
00:23:13,938 --> 00:23:15,038
What did you--
199
00:23:15,072 --> 00:23:16,641
what did you just say?
200
00:23:19,544 --> 00:23:20,578
Fuck you,
201
00:23:21,679 --> 00:23:23,114
motherfucker.
202
00:23:24,949 --> 00:23:26,951
Get the fuck
203
00:23:26,985 --> 00:23:29,187
out of my way!
204
00:24:06,591 --> 00:24:07,725
All I thought
205
00:24:13,765 --> 00:24:16,334
was my own wide-open cunt
206
00:24:21,272 --> 00:24:22,607
as open as a mouth
207
00:24:24,042 --> 00:24:24,976
screaming
208
00:24:25,009 --> 00:24:26,110
Mother. Mother!
209
00:24:26,144 --> 00:24:27,445
Motherfucker.
210
00:24:30,848 --> 00:24:32,784
Motherfucker.
211
00:24:51,703 --> 00:24:54,238
I didn't know a girlbody could do that.
212
00:24:57,542 --> 00:24:59,243
Shoot cum.
213
00:25:30,675 --> 00:25:32,176
My own thoughts. Mine.
214
00:25:32,210 --> 00:25:33,311
My own space.
215
00:25:33,344 --> 00:25:34,512
My own booze.My own tits.
216
00:25:34,545 --> 00:25:36,781
My own days.My own nights. Mine.
217
00:25:36,814 --> 00:25:38,583
My own sex. My own booze.
218
00:25:38,616 --> 00:25:41,085
My own food. My own thoughts.My own friends. My own space.
219
00:25:41,120 --> 00:25:42,320
Mine.
220
00:25:44,522 --> 00:25:45,790
Mine.
221
00:25:48,793 --> 00:25:49,794
Mine.
222
00:25:51,095 --> 00:25:54,165
Mine, mine, mine, mine.My own freedom.
223
00:26:10,581 --> 00:26:11,582
Mine.
224
00:26:12,151 --> 00:26:13,351
Mine, mine, mine.
225
00:26:18,656 --> 00:26:20,825
Like somethingpressed so far down
226
00:26:20,858 --> 00:26:21,859
in a body,
227
00:26:23,828 --> 00:26:24,962
it had to explode.
228
00:26:29,867 --> 00:26:31,436
Yuk!
229
00:26:35,773 --> 00:26:38,476
Where do youthink you're going?
230
00:26:39,277 --> 00:26:40,478
I know you.
231
00:26:43,981 --> 00:26:45,349
You're going nowhere.
232
00:27:04,902 --> 00:27:08,873
♪ A miner, 49-er,
and his daughter, ♪
233
00:27:08,906 --> 00:27:10,675
♪ Clementine ♪
234
00:27:15,180 --> 00:27:18,649
♪ Oh, my darlin',
oh, my darlin' ♪
235
00:27:18,683 --> 00:27:22,320
♪ Oh, my darlin' Clementine ♪
236
00:27:22,353 --> 00:27:24,956
♪ You were lost ♪
237
00:27:24,989 --> 00:27:27,258
♪ And gone forever ♪
238
00:27:27,291 --> 00:27:29,260
♪ Oh, my darlin' Clementine ♪
239
00:27:36,067 --> 00:27:38,170
So farfrom my father.
240
00:27:38,203 --> 00:27:40,772
So far from my father.
241
00:27:40,805 --> 00:27:43,040
So far from my father.
242
00:27:43,074 --> 00:27:44,542
So far from my father.
243
00:27:56,087 --> 00:27:57,421
I just want.
244
00:28:06,864 --> 00:28:07,965
I love your hands.
245
00:28:10,101 --> 00:28:11,469
I love your voice.
246
00:28:13,905 --> 00:28:17,441
It's my father and my brother
who have the real voices.
247
00:28:18,976 --> 00:28:21,345
I always hear them in my head.
248
00:28:22,281 --> 00:28:23,481
Really?
249
00:28:25,250 --> 00:28:26,684
What are they saying?
250
00:28:30,721 --> 00:28:32,757
They're singin'
"Amazing Grace."
251
00:28:37,162 --> 00:28:38,729
Voices of God.
252
00:28:39,997 --> 00:28:40,998
Fuck me.
253
00:28:42,700 --> 00:28:43,701
Yeah.
254
00:28:45,736 --> 00:28:47,572
No. Really.
255
00:28:48,906 --> 00:28:49,907
Fuck me.
256
00:29:00,585 --> 00:29:02,120
Poor Phillip.
257
00:29:05,022 --> 00:29:07,259
I wish I could goback and apologize.
258
00:29:21,306 --> 00:29:24,508
♪ The way
it's been going ♪
259
00:29:27,979 --> 00:29:30,481
♪ And I know that
peace will come ♪
260
00:29:32,016 --> 00:29:34,886
Fuck all y'all!
261
00:29:34,919 --> 00:29:36,554
Eat me!
262
00:29:36,587 --> 00:29:38,789
♪ I've been
a-searchin' ♪
263
00:29:40,192 --> 00:29:42,560
♪ For the dolphins ♪
264
00:29:42,593 --> 00:29:45,830
Just a regular James Taylor,
265
00:29:45,863 --> 00:29:49,500
singin' his heart
out here in Texas!
266
00:29:50,868 --> 00:29:53,938
♪ And
sometimes I wonder ♪
267
00:29:54,872 --> 00:29:59,577
♪ Do you ever think of me? ♪
268
00:30:03,581 --> 00:30:06,550
♪ This world may never change ♪
269
00:30:09,887 --> 00:30:13,691
♪ The way it's been going ♪
270
00:30:16,694 --> 00:30:19,096
♪ And I know that
peace will come ♪
271
00:30:25,536 --> 00:30:28,140
Lidia. Why do
you always do that?
272
00:30:34,779 --> 00:30:37,115
It's funny.
Come on. It's...
273
00:30:37,149 --> 00:30:38,716
Funny! You know it.
274
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:44,755
Such a pussy!
275
00:30:45,424 --> 00:30:47,525
Come on. Learn how to take a--
276
00:30:47,558 --> 00:30:50,594
Joke. You're so
fucking sensitive.
277
00:30:54,399 --> 00:30:55,900
This is probably
278
00:30:55,933 --> 00:30:57,868
one of the most pathetic
things I've ever seen.
279
00:31:01,605 --> 00:31:02,873
This is what I'm--
280
00:31:03,808 --> 00:31:05,643
This is what I'm talking about.
281
00:31:05,676 --> 00:31:09,780
It's like-- It's like talking
to a fucking doorknob.
282
00:31:09,814 --> 00:31:12,483
Why don't you say something?
283
00:31:13,218 --> 00:31:14,585
Please say anything.
284
00:31:14,618 --> 00:31:16,520
I'm being a fucking bitch,
285
00:31:16,554 --> 00:31:18,923
so why don't you do
something about it?
286
00:31:22,593 --> 00:31:24,595
You're not a bitch.
287
00:31:27,299 --> 00:31:28,666
Fuck you, Phillip!
288
00:31:30,868 --> 00:31:33,537
You don't even fucking
know me, Phillip.
289
00:31:58,263 --> 00:31:59,563
"Phillip"
290
00:32:00,698 --> 00:32:02,700
means "lover of horses."
291
00:32:05,337 --> 00:32:06,537
God damn.
292
00:32:07,339 --> 00:32:09,040
Or "brotherhood."
293
00:32:20,485 --> 00:32:22,720
Wake up, motherfucker!
294
00:32:39,538 --> 00:32:42,474
Hey, Lids.
Want to get out of here?
295
00:32:42,507 --> 00:32:45,143
She's good, man.
I'll take her back.
296
00:32:50,515 --> 00:32:53,118
Hey, man. Shut that door.
297
00:32:53,151 --> 00:32:55,353
Just shutthe goddamn door!
298
00:32:57,522 --> 00:32:59,357
Haven't seen you at practice.
299
00:33:00,425 --> 00:33:01,892
Yeah. I flunked out.
300
00:33:04,429 --> 00:33:05,729
That's cool.
301
00:33:18,510 --> 00:33:21,379
I canstill feel my face.
302
00:33:32,524 --> 00:33:34,292
Addiction is in me for sure.
303
00:33:36,694 --> 00:33:39,397
But I want to describesomething else to you.
304
00:33:40,432 --> 00:33:41,665
Something smaller.
305
00:33:43,801 --> 00:33:45,137
It's a smaller word.
306
00:33:47,405 --> 00:33:48,406
Mama?
307
00:33:51,143 --> 00:33:53,911
So small, it could
travel a bloodstream.
308
00:33:59,317 --> 00:34:01,051
Go away, Belle.
309
00:34:16,568 --> 00:34:18,203
Go away, Belle.
310
00:34:23,741 --> 00:34:25,042
Nice.
311
00:34:28,613 --> 00:34:30,047
Stay away.
312
00:34:31,550 --> 00:34:33,318
This isn't anything for you.
313
00:34:35,620 --> 00:34:37,721
I'm not talking about anything.
314
00:34:39,823 --> 00:34:41,926
I'm not talking about anything.
315
00:34:51,503 --> 00:34:53,471
I'm not talking about anything.
316
00:35:00,911 --> 00:35:02,314
Dorothy?
317
00:35:04,649 --> 00:35:06,384
Get up. Get up.
318
00:35:34,044 --> 00:35:35,045
I'm sorry!
319
00:35:41,785 --> 00:35:43,221
I'm sorry.
320
00:35:44,855 --> 00:35:46,023
Yeah.
321
00:35:47,024 --> 00:35:48,025
Lidia,
322
00:35:49,461 --> 00:35:50,894
you can talk to us.
323
00:35:52,062 --> 00:35:53,063
It helps.
324
00:35:54,299 --> 00:35:55,300
Trust me.
325
00:36:10,848 --> 00:36:12,950
I'm not talking about anything.
326
00:36:14,818 --> 00:36:17,555
You know,
I always like to say, uh...
327
00:36:19,691 --> 00:36:22,560
find meaning in life's traffic
328
00:36:23,861 --> 00:36:27,198
through clearing
spiritual barriers.
329
00:36:48,453 --> 00:36:49,454
Uh,
330
00:36:52,357 --> 00:36:53,824
I'm proud of you.
331
00:36:56,328 --> 00:36:57,329
You know?
332
00:37:01,098 --> 00:37:02,099
Yeah.
333
00:37:03,635 --> 00:37:04,835
Yeah.
334
00:37:15,213 --> 00:37:16,214
Hey.
335
00:37:19,784 --> 00:37:21,085
Would you marry me?
336
00:37:39,903 --> 00:37:41,773
Mm.
337
00:37:48,413 --> 00:37:49,414
Okay.
338
00:37:52,817 --> 00:37:56,554
♪ And children
have their dreams ♪
339
00:37:56,588 --> 00:37:59,324
♪ To hold on to ♪
340
00:38:02,025 --> 00:38:04,562
♪ And how they fly ♪
341
00:38:04,596 --> 00:38:07,198
♪ Take us to the moon ♪
342
00:38:09,099 --> 00:38:12,903
♪ Yes, they flow from you ♪
343
00:38:14,539 --> 00:38:17,475
♪ They flow from you ♪
344
00:38:19,110 --> 00:38:23,013
♪ And they flow from you ♪
345
00:38:25,383 --> 00:38:28,853
♪ And women have themselves ♪
346
00:38:28,887 --> 00:38:31,088
♪ To hold on to ♪
347
00:38:34,159 --> 00:38:36,694
♪ And how they fly ♪
348
00:38:36,728 --> 00:38:39,464
♪ Take me by surprise ♪
349
00:38:41,266 --> 00:38:45,570
♪ They float from me ♪
350
00:38:45,603 --> 00:38:49,474
♪ They float from me ♪
351
00:38:50,974 --> 00:38:55,078
♪ And they float from me ♪
352
00:39:00,618 --> 00:39:01,985
Aah!
353
00:39:06,891 --> 00:39:08,226
Aw!
354
00:39:14,265 --> 00:39:15,966
Oh!
355
00:39:22,373 --> 00:39:23,374
Oh!
356
00:39:27,010 --> 00:39:28,680
Sweetheart.
357
00:39:28,713 --> 00:39:29,980
You did so good.
358
00:39:30,013 --> 00:39:32,116
You did so good!
359
00:39:58,810 --> 00:40:00,578
I made you some tea.
360
00:40:00,612 --> 00:40:03,581
I don't want any
tea. What are we gonna do?
361
00:40:07,017 --> 00:40:08,419
Lidia,
362
00:40:08,820 --> 00:40:10,288
I love you.
363
00:40:11,956 --> 00:40:15,193
And whatever you want
to do, I'll support it.
364
00:40:20,063 --> 00:40:21,299
That's it?
365
00:40:26,237 --> 00:40:28,740
I need more than nothing
366
00:40:28,773 --> 00:40:31,910
from the most passive
man on the fucking planet!
367
00:40:47,859 --> 00:40:49,727
Sorry. I've been kind of sick.
368
00:40:54,832 --> 00:40:56,501
You don't want anything.
369
00:40:56,534 --> 00:41:00,605
And you are killing me with
your not wanting anything!
370
00:41:00,638 --> 00:41:03,374
- What were you thinking?
- I don't know.
371
00:41:03,408 --> 00:41:07,312
I don't know. I don't
know. It's fucking impossible!
372
00:41:07,345 --> 00:41:10,080
I can't stand how nice he--
373
00:41:10,114 --> 00:41:12,216
I can't stand how nice he is!
374
00:41:12,250 --> 00:41:15,853
But...I couldn't havekilled it either.
375
00:41:18,222 --> 00:41:19,490
I was thinking of--
376
00:41:21,459 --> 00:41:23,728
maybe there's
a world in which I--
377
00:41:25,496 --> 00:41:26,598
I come and
378
00:41:27,765 --> 00:41:28,733
live with you
379
00:41:28,766 --> 00:41:29,867
in Eugene
380
00:41:29,901 --> 00:41:31,002
and take some classes
381
00:41:31,035 --> 00:41:32,804
where you're teaching and...
382
00:41:32,837 --> 00:41:36,374
I don't know. Maybe we could
start, like, a little
383
00:41:38,943 --> 00:41:40,378
family.
384
00:41:45,416 --> 00:41:48,152
-Yes.
-'Cause I think my life with him
385
00:41:48,186 --> 00:41:51,689
is gonna be like some
sad, sad fucking country song.
386
00:41:51,723 --> 00:41:54,659
- And this is the only thing
-Lidia, Lidia, I--
387
00:41:54,692 --> 00:41:55,693
I said yes.
388
00:41:56,928 --> 00:41:58,363
Come home.
389
00:42:03,401 --> 00:42:04,402
Okay.
390
00:42:07,538 --> 00:42:08,539
Cool.
391
00:42:10,742 --> 00:42:13,177
Because sheleft me once
392
00:42:14,113 --> 00:42:15,546
to save her own life.
393
00:42:24,455 --> 00:42:26,157
What are you two
doing back there, huh?
394
00:42:26,190 --> 00:42:27,825
Playing with yourselves?
395
00:42:29,694 --> 00:42:30,695
What?
396
00:42:31,829 --> 00:42:33,231
I bring them to the most
beautiful scenery in the world,
397
00:42:33,264 --> 00:42:34,666
and--and they just
398
00:42:34,699 --> 00:42:35,800
playing grab-ass?
399
00:42:38,336 --> 00:42:40,705
Look out
the goddamn window!
400
00:42:58,823 --> 00:42:59,824
Claudia,
401
00:43:00,892 --> 00:43:03,928
grab the hacksaw from
under your mother's seat.
402
00:43:03,961 --> 00:43:05,630
Come on! Let's go.
403
00:43:30,655 --> 00:43:32,857
Here you go,
sweetheart.
404
00:43:32,890 --> 00:43:33,891
For sustenance.
405
00:43:35,359 --> 00:43:36,761
For sustenance.
406
00:43:38,963 --> 00:43:40,231
You don't want it?
407
00:43:48,639 --> 00:43:49,741
Come on, honey. Just
have a little sip.
408
00:43:49,774 --> 00:43:52,376
It'll warm you up. Mmm!
409
00:44:08,359 --> 00:44:11,562
♪ Blowin' bubbles
soft and fine... ♪
410
00:44:22,673 --> 00:44:24,709
Well, thank God.
411
00:44:32,151 --> 00:44:33,584
Where's the tree?
412
00:44:36,654 --> 00:44:37,655
Just--
413
00:44:42,059 --> 00:44:43,060
Mm.
414
00:44:45,663 --> 00:44:46,664
There.
415
00:44:47,498 --> 00:44:48,966
That's the picture.
416
00:44:58,976 --> 00:45:00,778
Welcome home.
417
00:45:00,812 --> 00:45:01,813
Oh!
418
00:45:06,151 --> 00:45:07,351
Come on in.
419
00:45:07,885 --> 00:45:09,053
I'll get that.
420
00:45:09,086 --> 00:45:10,688
Why?
'Cause I'm pregnant?
421
00:45:10,721 --> 00:45:11,722
Yeah.
422
00:45:16,861 --> 00:45:17,862
Oh.
423
00:45:37,348 --> 00:45:38,516
Here.
424
00:45:38,983 --> 00:45:40,351
Thanks.
425
00:45:41,986 --> 00:45:42,987
Mmm.
426
00:45:44,622 --> 00:45:45,756
Fuck.
427
00:45:53,431 --> 00:45:54,799
Thank you, Claudia.
428
00:45:59,770 --> 00:46:00,771
Oof.
429
00:46:03,941 --> 00:46:07,078
Do you remember when you
used to make me do things?
430
00:46:09,614 --> 00:46:11,382
Like...
431
00:46:11,415 --> 00:46:14,253
"Here. Bite this apple."
432
00:46:14,286 --> 00:46:16,321
Sock it in my mouth.
433
00:46:18,723 --> 00:46:20,958
"Here. Smell this ashtray."
434
00:46:20,992 --> 00:46:23,461
"Just blow it. One, two..."
435
00:46:23,494 --> 00:46:26,063
Ashes all over my fucking face.
436
00:46:30,468 --> 00:46:32,170
I would have done anything.
437
00:46:37,074 --> 00:46:38,542
You were mythic to me.
438
00:46:42,580 --> 00:46:43,848
I remember when
I went downstairs
439
00:46:43,881 --> 00:46:45,650
after you moved
into the basement.
440
00:46:46,584 --> 00:46:51,822
And, um, realize how
smart that was then but
441
00:46:54,226 --> 00:46:56,194
I used to look at
all of your stuff
442
00:46:56,228 --> 00:46:58,130
and used to touch it.
443
00:46:59,231 --> 00:47:00,731
One time I found
444
00:47:00,765 --> 00:47:02,466
a razor blade in your purse.
445
00:47:02,500 --> 00:47:05,237
Cut myself on it.
446
00:47:05,270 --> 00:47:07,605
Made the fact that
I had to pee hurt.
447
00:47:21,219 --> 00:47:22,586
I, um,
448
00:47:25,290 --> 00:47:26,490
I know that
449
00:47:26,524 --> 00:47:27,725
this is a...
450
00:47:28,526 --> 00:47:30,094
sacrifice.
451
00:47:32,096 --> 00:47:33,464
No, uh,
452
00:47:35,233 --> 00:47:36,600
It's just, you--
453
00:47:39,003 --> 00:47:40,638
you were so little. Uh,
454
00:47:42,441 --> 00:47:43,641
uh--
455
00:47:48,447 --> 00:47:49,647
yeah.
456
00:47:54,152 --> 00:47:55,153
Well,
457
00:47:57,688 --> 00:48:00,858
this is one way to
Frankenstein your life.
458
00:48:09,900 --> 00:48:11,269
Maybe...
459
00:48:11,303 --> 00:48:13,671
I've been waiting for this.
460
00:48:24,216 --> 00:48:25,516
Mmm.
461
00:48:38,430 --> 00:48:40,798
Yes. Breathe.
462
00:48:42,434 --> 00:48:44,202
I know.
463
00:48:47,105 --> 00:48:48,706
Come on. Come on.
464
00:48:50,808 --> 00:48:51,909
You...
465
00:48:51,942 --> 00:48:52,943
can...
466
00:48:53,245 --> 00:48:54,545
do it.
467
00:49:36,620 --> 00:49:37,822
Where is she?
468
00:49:40,392 --> 00:49:41,592
Can I hold her?
469
00:49:43,128 --> 00:49:44,129
Uh, yeah.
470
00:49:48,366 --> 00:49:52,170
Just one second.
We're just cleaning her up.
471
00:50:15,527 --> 00:50:16,794
Her lips are pink.
472
00:50:20,030 --> 00:50:21,031
They're pink.
473
00:51:37,342 --> 00:51:38,276
Just th--
474
00:51:40,345 --> 00:51:42,012
throw it as far as you can.
475
00:52:07,172 --> 00:52:09,374
It's not funny.
476
00:52:13,043 --> 00:52:14,044
Get it.
477
00:52:33,665 --> 00:52:34,865
God!
478
00:53:07,465 --> 00:53:08,566
Sorry.
479
00:53:47,472 --> 00:53:50,108
Look. She's all over you.
480
00:53:52,377 --> 00:53:54,479
You're fucking laughing.
481
00:54:27,812 --> 00:54:30,148
What livedand died between us
482
00:54:32,517 --> 00:54:33,518
haunts me
483
00:54:34,853 --> 00:54:36,053
still.
484
00:54:39,691 --> 00:54:41,326
God damn, girl.
485
00:54:41,359 --> 00:54:43,561
What are you,
some kind of mermaid?
486
00:54:45,296 --> 00:54:46,297
Yep.
487
00:54:51,503 --> 00:54:53,204
You gotsomething to say?
488
00:54:55,306 --> 00:54:56,307
No way.
489
00:54:58,576 --> 00:54:59,611
Come on.
490
00:55:01,212 --> 00:55:05,082
You deserve this. You
don't want to come with me?
491
00:55:05,116 --> 00:55:07,918
This is crazy. I'm not
even a grad student.
492
00:55:07,951 --> 00:55:09,287
I'm basically just trolling the
English department.
493
00:55:09,320 --> 00:55:11,389
You think Kesey
gives a rat's ass
494
00:55:11,423 --> 00:55:12,791
about U of O rules?
495
00:55:12,824 --> 00:55:14,793
You will regret not doing this.
496
00:55:14,826 --> 00:55:16,861
They won't even let me enroll.
497
00:55:16,895 --> 00:55:19,364
Bullshit. I already
told him about you.
498
00:55:19,864 --> 00:55:21,064
The--
499
00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:23,201
These--
500
00:55:26,104 --> 00:55:27,839
He's gonna love you.
501
00:55:32,510 --> 00:55:35,480
You don't want to write
a novel with Ken Kesey?
502
00:55:56,367 --> 00:55:57,735
Hey, everyone.
503
00:55:57,769 --> 00:55:59,704
Um, hey, everybody. Hey.
504
00:56:03,675 --> 00:56:05,176
You're an idiot.
505
00:56:05,210 --> 00:56:07,512
Hi. Um, this is Lidia.
506
00:56:09,814 --> 00:56:11,282
-Say hi.
-Hi.
507
00:56:14,486 --> 00:56:15,620
Well, hello.
508
00:56:16,254 --> 00:56:17,856
What do we have here?
509
00:56:17,889 --> 00:56:20,023
A triple-A tootsie?
510
00:56:23,328 --> 00:56:25,296
I know what happened to you.
511
00:56:28,800 --> 00:56:30,401
Death is a motherfucker.
512
00:56:39,978 --> 00:56:41,179
Ah!
513
00:56:42,814 --> 00:56:44,616
Shit.
514
00:56:44,649 --> 00:56:45,483
- Jeff?
- Yes.
515
00:56:45,517 --> 00:56:47,050
You think
you can roll one?
516
00:56:47,084 --> 00:56:49,821
I always hate sitting in
a room full of writers.
517
00:56:49,854 --> 00:56:51,122
Sure.
518
00:57:00,365 --> 00:57:02,032
The chair will be fine.
519
00:57:03,434 --> 00:57:05,270
I want you all
520
00:57:10,975 --> 00:57:13,043
I want you all to be winners.
521
00:57:13,711 --> 00:57:15,246
I want
522
00:57:15,280 --> 00:57:17,148
you to be warriors.
523
00:57:18,449 --> 00:57:19,450
Warriors.
524
00:57:20,118 --> 00:57:22,186
I'll give you the warrior test.
525
00:57:22,587 --> 00:57:23,821
Shit floats.
526
00:57:24,656 --> 00:57:25,990
Cream rises.
527
00:57:26,024 --> 00:57:29,059
Shit floats. Jerry Rubin.
528
00:57:31,094 --> 00:57:32,497
Cream rises.
529
00:57:40,438 --> 00:57:41,439
Ferlinghetti.
530
00:57:44,442 --> 00:57:45,443
Lord Buckley.
531
00:57:46,477 --> 00:57:47,745
Lenny Bruce.
532
00:57:48,880 --> 00:57:50,114
The greats.
533
00:57:52,016 --> 00:57:53,585
I want you to be great.
534
00:57:56,054 --> 00:57:57,488
Shit, somebody
535
00:57:58,623 --> 00:58:01,759
has got to create our
culture for the next 50 years.
536
00:58:01,793 --> 00:58:03,194
And I want it to be you.
537
00:58:03,227 --> 00:58:04,929
All right.
There are only two rules.
538
00:58:04,963 --> 00:58:06,331
One,
539
00:58:06,364 --> 00:58:08,333
do not talk the plot
of our novel
540
00:58:08,366 --> 00:58:10,868
to anyone outside this class.
541
00:58:11,869 --> 00:58:15,406
Two, I comprise 50% of the class
542
00:58:15,440 --> 00:58:18,242
so we only write together
543
00:58:19,177 --> 00:58:21,145
because we will publish
544
00:58:21,179 --> 00:58:22,880
or perish together.
545
00:58:29,887 --> 00:58:31,489
Nelson Algren said
546
00:58:33,057 --> 00:58:34,659
"The job of the writer
547
00:58:35,627 --> 00:58:38,529
is to pull the judge
down onto the dock,
548
00:58:40,064 --> 00:58:41,366
to make
549
00:58:42,433 --> 00:58:45,536
the Almighty feel
what it's like to be down low."
550
00:58:46,738 --> 00:58:47,805
He'll be all right.
551
00:58:49,874 --> 00:58:51,542
Grass never killed anybody.
552
00:58:52,844 --> 00:58:54,679
So, go.
553
00:58:56,180 --> 00:58:57,515
Right now.
554
00:58:58,316 --> 00:59:00,151
Write some bizarre sentences.
555
00:59:00,184 --> 00:59:03,187
Hey! Where are you?
556
00:59:03,221 --> 00:59:06,924
You can't take Quaaludes
before the class.
557
00:59:06,958 --> 00:59:09,060
Now disappear into
your imagination.
558
00:59:09,093 --> 00:59:10,461
Come on!
559
00:59:10,495 --> 00:59:12,196
Disappear into your imagination.
560
00:59:12,230 --> 00:59:14,432
Nobody's in the room
but you and that pen.
561
00:59:19,570 --> 00:59:20,705
Better.
562
00:59:23,108 --> 00:59:24,575
Here you are.
563
00:59:24,609 --> 00:59:26,177
This is the shit.
564
00:59:30,848 --> 00:59:32,583
I wrote "Demon Box" in here.
565
00:59:33,651 --> 00:59:36,087
This room here is a
creative room here.
566
00:59:36,121 --> 00:59:37,588
It's a creative space.
567
00:59:37,622 --> 00:59:38,623
Hey, Bennett.
568
00:59:39,590 --> 00:59:41,225
You didn't bring any
ludes with you, did you?
569
00:59:41,259 --> 00:59:44,395
You know, those kind of
drugs put you into your body,
570
00:59:44,429 --> 00:59:45,730
not into your mind.
571
00:59:46,731 --> 00:59:50,802
Stick with the acid,
psilocybin, San Pedro --
572
00:59:50,835 --> 00:59:53,504
something that'll
disintegrate your ego
573
00:59:53,538 --> 00:59:55,740
so you can hear
your inner voice.
574
00:59:56,974 --> 00:59:58,876
And you write from that voice.
575
01:00:01,379 --> 01:00:03,614
You want your voice
to come through.
576
01:00:08,286 --> 01:00:09,921
Oh, Jesus.
577
01:00:12,590 --> 01:00:14,726
That's not supposed to happen.
578
01:00:15,426 --> 01:00:17,462
I got wrestler's knees.
579
01:00:19,630 --> 01:00:21,133
All right.
580
01:00:21,166 --> 01:00:23,501
Let's get outside
before the sun sets.
581
01:00:24,169 --> 01:00:25,369
I want you
582
01:00:26,904 --> 01:00:28,740
to meet someone.
583
01:00:32,144 --> 01:00:33,244
Come on!
584
01:00:33,644 --> 01:00:34,645
Fuck you, God!
585
01:00:36,414 --> 01:00:38,217
God got the
commandments wrong.
586
01:00:38,249 --> 01:00:39,650
I think there's 11 commandments.
587
01:00:39,684 --> 01:00:42,386
And it should be the
first commandment, have mercy.
588
01:00:42,420 --> 01:00:45,490
- Hey.
- Lord, have mercy!
589
01:00:45,523 --> 01:00:47,992
Just think if everybody
had mercy for each other,
590
01:00:48,025 --> 01:00:49,393
where we'd be today.
591
01:00:49,427 --> 01:00:51,629
You see a man in the
street who needs a few dollars.
592
01:00:51,662 --> 01:00:55,700
Give it to him. Give it to him.
Have mercy. He needs it.
593
01:00:55,733 --> 01:00:57,802
He wouldn't ask for
it if he didn't need it.
594
01:01:00,071 --> 01:01:01,272
Mercy.
595
01:01:02,440 --> 01:01:04,375
Hire me to rewrite the...
596
01:01:05,543 --> 01:01:06,544
Bible.
597
01:01:28,466 --> 01:01:30,701
What are you, some
kind of mermaid?
598
01:01:39,977 --> 01:01:40,978
Yep.
599
01:01:53,457 --> 01:01:55,893
You know,
when Jed died, my boy,
600
01:01:56,994 --> 01:01:59,030
I wanted to cease to exist.
601
01:02:07,206 --> 01:02:11,475
And everybody that talked to
me said something asinine.
602
01:02:15,012 --> 01:02:16,747
Or didn't say anything at all.
603
01:02:31,196 --> 01:02:33,464
Nobody understands
death anymore.
604
01:02:38,237 --> 01:02:39,537
It used to be sacred.
605
01:02:40,172 --> 01:02:41,372
So sacred.
606
01:02:46,345 --> 01:02:47,545
Shit.
607
01:02:49,480 --> 01:02:52,516
No one's big enough to
hold what happens to us.
608
01:02:56,188 --> 01:02:57,622
No one is big enough
609
01:02:59,191 --> 01:03:00,825
to hold what happens to us.
610
01:03:07,199 --> 01:03:08,799
You got something to say?
611
01:03:17,475 --> 01:03:18,809
It's in your hands.
612
01:03:42,900 --> 01:03:46,437
Everything aboutmy father was in his hands.
613
01:03:51,376 --> 01:03:53,711
It's allabout coordination.
614
01:03:56,248 --> 01:03:59,318
A perfectly balanced dance of
615
01:03:59,351 --> 01:04:00,718
shadow and light.
616
01:04:02,019 --> 01:04:04,822
Beforemy father was my father,
617
01:04:05,623 --> 01:04:07,192
he was an artist.
618
01:04:07,225 --> 01:04:10,661
Your daddy won a prize
619
01:04:10,695 --> 01:04:12,096
for this drawing.
620
01:04:14,799 --> 01:04:17,601
Beforemy father was an artist,
621
01:04:18,236 --> 01:04:19,503
he was an athlete.
622
01:04:21,539 --> 01:04:23,607
Before my fatherwas my father,
623
01:04:27,011 --> 01:04:28,012
he was beautiful.
624
01:04:29,147 --> 01:04:30,148
And she was.
625
01:04:31,283 --> 01:04:32,984
Before my fatherwas my father,
626
01:04:34,419 --> 01:04:35,619
he was a boy.
627
01:04:36,188 --> 01:04:37,488
Just a boy
628
01:04:38,190 --> 01:04:39,590
whose own mother
629
01:04:40,158 --> 01:04:41,993
cut his tongue.
630
01:04:48,166 --> 01:04:49,867
Before I hated him,
631
01:04:51,902 --> 01:04:52,903
I loved him.
632
01:04:59,043 --> 01:05:00,145
Look up.
633
01:05:00,178 --> 01:05:01,512
Now, if you don't lookwhere you're going,
634
01:05:01,545 --> 01:05:02,847
you're gonna crash, you hear me?
635
01:05:02,880 --> 01:05:03,914
When you get to thebottom of the hill,
636
01:05:03,948 --> 01:05:06,151
you just brake enough
to make a turn.
637
01:05:06,184 --> 01:05:07,185
Okay?
638
01:05:11,088 --> 01:05:12,556
Go.
639
01:05:12,590 --> 01:05:14,159
Keep your eyes on the road!
640
01:05:14,192 --> 01:05:15,526
Keep going.
641
01:05:16,027 --> 01:05:17,262
Keep your head up!
642
01:05:22,200 --> 01:05:23,502
Keep those eyes on the road.
643
01:05:23,534 --> 01:05:25,102
You gotta brake!
644
01:05:29,774 --> 01:05:30,941
Mike?
645
01:05:31,209 --> 01:05:32,210
Mike.
646
01:05:32,943 --> 01:05:34,179
Mike!
647
01:05:34,212 --> 01:05:35,980
-Get a flashlight.
-What for?
648
01:05:36,013 --> 01:05:37,449
I think
she's hurt down there.
649
01:05:37,482 --> 01:05:40,252
- What?!
What happened?!
650
01:05:40,285 --> 01:05:41,420
Just shut
the goddamn door.
651
01:05:42,387 --> 01:05:43,422
Mm, yeah.
652
01:05:43,455 --> 01:05:45,424
You done
with that chapter?
653
01:05:51,129 --> 01:05:52,130
Yep.
654
01:06:10,848 --> 01:06:11,849
Hey.
655
01:06:12,983 --> 01:06:15,320
Hi. Hello.
656
01:06:20,525 --> 01:06:23,228
I'm a writer.
657
01:06:37,242 --> 01:06:38,510
Thank you.
658
01:06:39,511 --> 01:06:40,878
Thank you.
659
01:06:40,911 --> 01:06:44,882
We are gathered because, uh,
we want to see the results.
660
01:06:44,915 --> 01:06:49,920
We want to witness the
results of this experiment,
661
01:06:49,954 --> 01:06:54,359
a collaborative
novel written by us.
662
01:06:55,427 --> 01:06:57,462
Please, let's welcome
663
01:06:57,496 --> 01:07:00,332
the first of the
not-so-merry pranksters
664
01:07:00,365 --> 01:07:03,033
to the stage to present
665
01:07:04,302 --> 01:07:05,303
"Caverns."
666
01:07:06,304 --> 01:07:08,306
Lidia, come on up.
667
01:07:11,576 --> 01:07:13,077
You're gonna kill it.
668
01:07:31,229 --> 01:07:32,430
Whoo!
669
01:07:34,064 --> 01:07:35,300
Hello.
670
01:07:35,333 --> 01:07:37,402
My thigh, behind my knee.
671
01:07:37,435 --> 01:07:38,769
- There you go.
- You, too?
672
01:07:38,802 --> 01:07:40,238
- Thank you for coming.
- My ass crack.
673
01:07:40,272 --> 01:07:42,307
Back of my knees, and
they're just like...
674
01:07:42,340 --> 01:07:43,674
Lidia's father.
675
01:07:44,742 --> 01:07:47,711
What can I say? I'm a
great admirer of yours.
676
01:07:47,745 --> 01:07:49,381
Mike.
Is that right?
677
01:07:50,215 --> 01:07:51,849
That's right.
678
01:07:51,882 --> 01:07:54,685
Glad you could make it.
679
01:07:54,718 --> 01:07:57,489
Lidia and I, we saw
"Cuckoo's Nest" and, uh,
680
01:07:57,522 --> 01:08:00,458
"Sometimes a Great Notion"
together, and it's just great.
681
01:08:00,492 --> 01:08:02,360
I mean, great books.
682
01:08:05,197 --> 01:08:06,464
You know, Mike
683
01:08:08,065 --> 01:08:09,099
Lidia here
684
01:08:10,768 --> 01:08:13,205
she can knock it
out of the park.
685
01:08:17,375 --> 01:08:19,110
Do you want me to sign that?
686
01:08:23,582 --> 01:08:25,082
Thanks for coming, Dad.
687
01:08:30,655 --> 01:08:31,855
Okay.
688
01:08:32,424 --> 01:08:33,425
To...
689
01:08:34,159 --> 01:08:35,160
Mike?
690
01:08:36,161 --> 01:08:37,162
Please.
691
01:08:39,029 --> 01:08:40,030
"To Mike.
692
01:08:41,031 --> 01:08:42,032
Be
693
01:08:44,269 --> 01:08:45,270
brave."
694
01:08:54,979 --> 01:08:56,281
There you go, Mike.
695
01:09:00,918 --> 01:09:02,187
There you go, baby.
696
01:09:03,121 --> 01:09:04,054
Yep.
697
01:09:24,743 --> 01:09:27,178
I've seen a lot of
writers come and go.
698
01:09:31,283 --> 01:09:32,417
You got the stuff.
699
01:09:38,989 --> 01:09:40,458
Got something for you.
700
01:09:41,058 --> 01:09:42,059
Here.
701
01:09:44,195 --> 01:09:45,196
Here.
702
01:09:47,965 --> 01:09:51,202
It comes from the most
spiritual beach on Earth.
703
01:09:53,204 --> 01:09:54,205
Hold that.
704
01:09:56,341 --> 01:09:57,509
You can hold it all.
705
01:10:00,878 --> 01:10:02,946
You're gonna hold it all, girl.
706
01:10:09,621 --> 01:10:10,821
So,
707
01:10:12,290 --> 01:10:13,391
so, what's next?
708
01:10:16,661 --> 01:10:19,830
-Next?
-Next. What is next? Next.
709
01:10:28,206 --> 01:10:30,941
I want to write
"The Sound and the Fury."
710
01:10:42,120 --> 01:10:43,854
Of course you do, honey.
711
01:10:45,523 --> 01:10:46,857
Oh, boy.
712
01:10:51,995 --> 01:10:54,332
Here. Throw it and
see if I can catch it.
713
01:10:54,366 --> 01:10:55,367
-Ready?
-Yeah.
714
01:10:56,568 --> 01:10:58,102
-Ah!
-Shit!
715
01:11:00,105 --> 01:11:01,106
Ah.
716
01:11:02,107 --> 01:11:05,008
A lot riding on that going in.
717
01:11:08,213 --> 01:11:10,281
It has no metaphor.
718
01:11:11,182 --> 01:11:13,518
- Okay.
- Fuck metaphors.
719
01:11:14,152 --> 01:11:14,985
Okay.
720
01:11:15,018 --> 01:11:17,020
It's just
a rock that fell.
721
01:11:25,963 --> 01:11:28,400
I'm gonna get the
rock and I'm gonna go pee.
722
01:11:28,433 --> 01:11:30,100
-All right.
-Ugh!
723
01:11:30,135 --> 01:11:32,337
Oh, yeah. There
we go. You got it.
724
01:11:36,907 --> 01:11:39,210
That wasthe last time I saw him.
725
01:11:39,244 --> 01:11:41,212
You can write, girl!
726
01:11:41,246 --> 01:11:43,681
I'm of the opinion,that he drowned.
727
01:11:51,156 --> 01:11:53,758
Caddy wants to fuck.
728
01:11:53,792 --> 01:11:55,527
She's insatiable.
729
01:11:55,560 --> 01:11:59,264
And because her neighbor boy
man has a giant pants bulge
730
01:11:59,297 --> 01:12:01,433
and a sound that
comes out of him
731
01:12:01,466 --> 01:12:02,567
instead of language,
732
01:12:02,600 --> 01:12:04,101
she goes over to his house
733
01:12:04,135 --> 01:12:05,969
and she removes
all of her clothes,
734
01:12:06,003 --> 01:12:07,971
so he finally fucks her
735
01:12:08,873 --> 01:12:10,475
and crushes her.
736
01:12:12,610 --> 01:12:14,846
He fucks her to death,
737
01:12:14,879 --> 01:12:17,348
and she loves it!
738
01:12:17,382 --> 01:12:20,785
And she laughs until she cries,
and an ambulance has to come.
739
01:12:20,819 --> 01:12:22,085
But it's too late.
740
01:12:23,388 --> 01:12:25,490
That is "The Sound
and the Fury."
741
01:12:26,925 --> 01:12:28,126
Trite.
742
01:12:29,427 --> 01:12:32,363
Look, I've already read
"The Sound and the Fury."
743
01:12:32,397 --> 01:12:35,098
Reworking Faulkner
is some college shit.
744
01:12:40,037 --> 01:12:42,340
Maybe try something original.
745
01:12:44,776 --> 01:12:45,976
God,
746
01:12:46,377 --> 01:12:47,378
I hate them.
747
01:12:47,912 --> 01:12:49,647
Hey.
748
01:12:49,681 --> 01:12:51,349
What the hell does he know?
749
01:12:51,883 --> 01:12:53,485
It is original.
750
01:12:53,518 --> 01:12:55,286
It's a fucking pastiche.
751
01:12:56,321 --> 01:12:58,456
- Hey!
- Ha! Hey.
752
01:12:58,490 --> 01:13:01,392
You want to go to the
coast? I got us a room.
753
01:13:01,793 --> 01:13:03,161
Hi, Hannah.
754
01:13:03,194 --> 01:13:04,896
We're actually gonna work
on these this weekend.
755
01:13:04,929 --> 01:13:05,996
- Right.
- Come on.
756
01:13:06,029 --> 01:13:07,398
Is your fly undone?
757
01:13:08,399 --> 01:13:09,367
Lids.
758
01:13:10,935 --> 01:13:13,103
- What is that?
- Oh!
759
01:13:16,641 --> 01:13:18,008
I fucking dare you.
760
01:13:20,678 --> 01:13:21,679
Come on.
761
01:13:22,680 --> 01:13:23,848
Anything.
762
01:13:24,916 --> 01:13:26,251
Anytime.
763
01:13:26,284 --> 01:13:27,485
Whoa!
764
01:13:27,519 --> 01:13:29,120
Anywhere.Anything. Anytime. Anywhere.
765
01:13:29,153 --> 01:13:30,355
Please be careful!
766
01:13:30,388 --> 01:13:32,190
To feel absolutely
767
01:13:32,223 --> 01:13:34,024
nothing.
768
01:13:37,228 --> 01:13:39,364
I'm gonna go
grab some firewood.
769
01:13:39,397 --> 01:13:41,566
Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
770
01:14:04,122 --> 01:14:05,557
Is this like a--
771
01:14:07,525 --> 01:14:08,593
a fuck trip?
772
01:14:13,865 --> 01:14:15,065
What?
773
01:14:17,335 --> 01:14:19,704
I've never -- I've
never licked pussy.
774
01:14:20,738 --> 01:14:22,440
Oh!
775
01:15:29,073 --> 01:15:31,409
I wantedto stay like that.
776
01:15:40,351 --> 01:15:42,420
Outside of any word.
777
01:15:48,259 --> 01:15:50,395
Insidethe unnamed wet.
778
01:16:18,756 --> 01:16:19,957
You okay?
779
01:17:06,571 --> 01:17:08,372
I love you, Lids.
780
01:17:19,151 --> 01:17:20,485
I really love you.
781
01:17:41,773 --> 01:17:42,774
Yeah.
782
01:17:43,808 --> 01:17:44,942
I'll see you later.
783
01:17:59,323 --> 01:18:00,691
In water,
784
01:18:01,959 --> 01:18:02,960
like in books
785
01:18:06,265 --> 01:18:07,832
you can leave your life.
786
01:18:30,988 --> 01:18:32,056
- I got it.
787
01:18:32,089 --> 01:18:33,357
- No!
- I got it!
788
01:18:33,391 --> 01:18:35,227
I remembera happy childhood.
789
01:18:35,260 --> 01:18:36,961
Come on, come on.
790
01:18:36,994 --> 01:18:39,231
We dive,we swim, we race.
791
01:18:39,264 --> 01:18:40,965
Lidia went
fast that time.
792
01:18:40,998 --> 01:18:44,101
We laugh likeother people's children.
793
01:18:53,044 --> 01:18:56,981
I remember first and lastnames like Evie Kosenkranius
794
01:18:57,014 --> 01:18:58,482
and Lynn Collella Belle.
795
01:18:58,516 --> 01:19:01,886
Lynn Collella Belle.Lynn Collella Belle.
796
01:19:01,919 --> 01:19:02,987
Lynn Collella Belle.
797
01:19:05,523 --> 01:19:07,491
Making song loops in my skull.
798
01:19:07,525 --> 01:19:09,093
♪ Lynn Collella ♪
799
01:19:09,127 --> 01:19:10,862
♪ Lynn Collella Belle ♪
800
01:19:10,895 --> 01:19:11,863
Belle.
801
01:19:20,972 --> 01:19:23,108
Lynn Collella Belle.
802
01:19:33,017 --> 01:19:34,018
Mono?
803
01:19:35,354 --> 01:19:37,388
Isn't that
the kissing disease?
804
01:19:40,925 --> 01:19:42,827
No. Don't be silly.
805
01:19:46,131 --> 01:19:47,765
Everything's gonna
be okay, Belle.
806
01:19:47,798 --> 01:19:48,666
You'll see.
807
01:19:48,699 --> 01:19:49,934
You're gonna feel better.
808
01:19:53,604 --> 01:19:56,774
And your daddy's gonna
take real good care of you.
809
01:19:58,277 --> 01:19:59,844
- Aren't you?
- We'll be all right.
810
01:19:59,877 --> 01:20:02,947
Okay. Mama's
gonna go sell some houses.
811
01:20:04,582 --> 01:20:06,417
Hey, honey.
812
01:20:12,324 --> 01:20:13,424
My baby girl.
813
01:20:14,759 --> 01:20:16,961
You just give it
a couple of days.
814
01:20:20,798 --> 01:20:22,433
Shh.
815
01:20:23,467 --> 01:20:25,503
It is languageletting me say...
816
01:20:25,536 --> 01:20:26,904
There you go.
817
01:20:26,938 --> 01:20:28,973
...how fourweeks can be years.
818
01:20:31,776 --> 01:20:34,146
It is the yielding expanse
819
01:20:34,512 --> 01:20:35,713
of a white
820
01:20:36,148 --> 01:20:37,349
page.
821
01:21:15,586 --> 01:21:18,589
Have you
shown these to anyone?
822
01:21:20,292 --> 01:21:21,492
No.
823
01:21:27,399 --> 01:21:29,134
Like, body,
824
01:21:29,468 --> 01:21:30,668
skin
825
01:21:31,002 --> 01:21:32,003
scars.
826
01:21:34,572 --> 01:21:37,142
People always ask me why
827
01:21:37,175 --> 01:21:39,043
my work is so dark.
828
01:21:41,446 --> 01:21:44,282
What do you knowabout pain, Lidia?
829
01:21:45,549 --> 01:21:46,751
Um,
830
01:21:49,920 --> 01:21:50,921
I know that
831
01:21:53,325 --> 01:21:54,959
it matters to me.
832
01:21:57,661 --> 01:21:59,830
I'm gonna take care of you.
833
01:22:03,734 --> 01:22:05,036
Do you understand?
834
01:22:10,841 --> 01:22:12,810
Now ask me for what you want.
835
01:22:17,482 --> 01:22:18,682
Um.
836
01:22:20,718 --> 01:22:23,155
That's not right, angel.
837
01:22:23,188 --> 01:22:24,189
Um,
838
01:22:25,490 --> 01:22:26,690
um,
839
01:22:28,092 --> 01:22:29,093
I
840
01:22:30,328 --> 01:22:31,296
want
841
01:22:31,530 --> 01:22:32,464
you
842
01:22:32,497 --> 01:22:33,697
to
843
01:22:34,765 --> 01:22:36,100
Mm?
844
01:22:37,502 --> 01:22:39,271
Knock it out of me.
845
01:22:45,510 --> 01:22:46,877
To whip me.
846
01:22:48,280 --> 01:22:50,714
Where would
you like to be whipped,
847
01:22:51,516 --> 01:22:52,716
angel?
848
01:22:56,687 --> 01:22:57,988
Everywhere.
849
01:23:03,661 --> 01:23:05,729
Take it somewhere.
850
01:23:08,666 --> 01:23:10,502
Take the pain somewhere.
851
01:23:17,242 --> 01:23:18,609
Mama.
852
01:23:28,819 --> 01:23:30,322
I am proud of you.
853
01:23:42,099 --> 01:23:45,035
I'm not tryingto creep you out.
854
01:23:52,611 --> 01:23:54,279
I am trying to be precise.
855
01:24:03,954 --> 01:24:05,423
"At the moment my
mother was whining,
856
01:24:05,457 --> 01:24:06,891
Daddy was smelling my cunt.
857
01:24:06,924 --> 01:24:08,826
I've reached my best
moment now, he explained.
858
01:24:08,859 --> 01:24:10,761
Now I was sure what
he was referring to.
859
01:24:10,794 --> 01:24:12,230
This is the moment of truth.
860
01:24:12,264 --> 01:24:14,332
I'm going off, off,
off, jacking it off.
861
01:24:14,366 --> 01:24:16,401
My hands are gonna be
broken from this one.
862
01:24:16,434 --> 01:24:17,835
I don't even
recognize my own body.
863
01:24:17,868 --> 01:24:19,437
It doesn't matter.
I know you're mine.
864
01:24:19,471 --> 01:24:20,938
I made you, I'm making you.
865
01:24:20,971 --> 01:24:22,440
I swore I'd live for pleasure.
866
01:24:22,474 --> 01:24:23,974
My tongue is fucking enormous.
867
01:24:24,008 --> 01:24:25,410
Feel it. It's reaching
down to my waist.
868
01:24:25,443 --> 01:24:28,446
You're seeing your actual
father in his moment of truth.
869
01:24:28,480 --> 01:24:29,914
God Almighty, nothing matters.
870
01:24:29,947 --> 01:24:32,284
You're my God, my
daughter, I worship you.
871
01:24:32,317 --> 01:24:34,252
I beg you to do it
show I can please you.
872
01:24:34,286 --> 01:24:36,820
Now look at it. It's big in
my corkscrewing hand.
873
01:24:36,854 --> 01:24:38,856
Kiss it. My father
explained again,
874
01:24:38,889 --> 01:24:41,759
I am fucking God and
I made God. Holy shit.
875
01:24:41,792 --> 01:24:43,128
All I have to do
is look at God,
876
01:24:43,161 --> 01:24:44,995
and God is happy 'cause
I've made God cum.
877
01:24:45,029 --> 01:24:47,064
God is in heaven. I'm
in heaven and I've died.
878
01:24:47,097 --> 01:24:49,733
The whole world in heaven. I'm
cumming all over your face.
879
01:24:49,767 --> 01:24:50,968
I licked up his sperm."
880
01:24:51,001 --> 01:24:52,370
This is
making me sick.
881
01:25:11,989 --> 01:25:14,992
Who in the helldo you think you are?
882
01:25:16,461 --> 01:25:18,028
My father's daughter.
883
01:26:00,004 --> 01:26:01,038
Goddamn.
884
01:26:02,274 --> 01:26:03,541
Year one.
885
01:26:03,575 --> 01:26:05,909
Vodka!
886
01:26:07,112 --> 01:26:10,080
I drink vodka,mostly all the time.
887
01:26:10,115 --> 01:26:12,684
One shot in the eye,
shot in the eye.
888
01:26:12,717 --> 01:26:14,452
And feltnothing about myself.
889
01:26:17,988 --> 01:26:20,057
We drink, we laugh, we fuck.
890
01:26:20,958 --> 01:26:23,060
We make fuck-body paint shadows.
891
01:26:24,496 --> 01:26:27,332
We make performanceart. We perform ourselves.
892
01:26:27,365 --> 01:26:29,800
Fuck you, God!
893
01:26:37,007 --> 01:26:40,312
Open the door!
894
01:26:40,345 --> 01:26:42,714
We carved eachother's names into our arms.
895
01:26:42,747 --> 01:26:44,649
I did it for you!
896
01:26:47,252 --> 01:26:48,253
Fuck!
897
01:26:53,023 --> 01:26:54,259
We fuck septic.
898
01:26:54,292 --> 01:26:55,694
It was right in
front of me, Devin.
899
01:26:55,727 --> 01:26:57,395
I could see exactly
what was happening.
900
01:26:57,429 --> 01:26:59,497
-You don't even realize.
-I don't even realize what?!
901
01:26:59,531 --> 01:27:01,733
You don't even realize I'm gonna
fucking marry you.
902
01:27:01,766 --> 01:27:04,135
Whoa! Oh!
903
01:27:06,036 --> 01:27:07,871
To Mike and Dorothy.
904
01:27:07,905 --> 01:27:10,108
I'm so happy they fucked.
905
01:27:13,778 --> 01:27:16,614
- To skip to year six,
- Hey!
906
01:27:16,648 --> 01:27:17,848
whenunderwater stories
907
01:27:17,881 --> 01:27:19,384
- start itching
- Come on!
908
01:27:19,417 --> 01:27:20,851
and yellingbegins a rhythm
909
01:27:20,884 --> 01:27:22,320
where drinking getslouder and him--
910
01:27:22,354 --> 01:27:25,089
Go back to kissing women I know
and kissing women I don't know!
911
01:27:25,123 --> 01:27:27,659
And what is acouple over time but a line?
912
01:27:27,692 --> 01:27:28,892
I'll show you
a fucking line.
913
01:27:28,926 --> 01:27:31,463
Your fucking bullshit is
taking over the house!
914
01:27:31,496 --> 01:27:34,098
It wastaking over the house.
915
01:27:39,404 --> 01:27:40,405
Oh, no.
916
01:27:41,773 --> 01:27:42,973
Oh, no.
917
01:27:44,576 --> 01:27:45,577
Oh, no.
918
01:27:54,586 --> 01:27:55,886
Fuck.
919
01:28:01,393 --> 01:28:02,527
I don't wanna fuck.
920
01:28:04,763 --> 01:28:06,197
I want to read.
921
01:28:08,466 --> 01:28:09,467
Fuck you.
922
01:28:15,106 --> 01:28:17,308
I didn'twant to drink.
923
01:28:19,544 --> 01:28:20,612
I wanted to write.
924
01:28:29,920 --> 01:28:32,123
What is a couple
over time but a line?
925
01:28:36,628 --> 01:28:38,929
Year seven,I finish my dissertation.
926
01:28:45,737 --> 01:28:47,305
Year eight, I get a PhD.
927
01:29:04,021 --> 01:29:05,223
Year ten.
928
01:29:06,458 --> 01:29:07,459
We pretend.
929
01:29:12,497 --> 01:29:13,631
You said then
930
01:29:15,900 --> 01:29:18,670
you would love me until I die.
931
01:29:23,441 --> 01:29:26,344
You said we would
die together in love.
932
01:29:40,124 --> 01:29:42,126
You said it to me.
933
01:29:46,197 --> 01:29:47,998
Where are you?
934
01:29:54,672 --> 01:29:56,006
Where is the man?
935
01:30:12,257 --> 01:30:14,425
Who would love a woman like me?
936
01:30:58,136 --> 01:30:59,737
Don't you dare.
937
01:31:37,642 --> 01:31:38,643
Ha.
938
01:33:01,359 --> 01:33:03,461
"The date of your reading."
939
01:33:26,851 --> 01:33:28,219
What?
940
01:33:51,909 --> 01:33:53,611
Please welcome
941
01:33:58,816 --> 01:34:01,419
reading an excerpt fromher first collection
942
01:34:01,452 --> 01:34:03,387
of short stories,"Her Other Mouths,"
943
01:34:03,421 --> 01:34:05,423
Lidia Yuknavitch.
944
01:34:08,193 --> 01:34:10,561
Lidia, please. Welcome.
945
01:34:25,276 --> 01:34:27,812
"The day
my daughter was born.
946
01:34:29,781 --> 01:34:31,382
After I held the future.
947
01:34:35,820 --> 01:34:36,821
Stillborn.
948
01:34:40,658 --> 01:34:41,659
And pink.
949
01:34:46,831 --> 01:34:47,832
And rose-lipped.
950
01:34:51,102 --> 01:34:53,571
And rose-lipped in
my shivering arms.
951
01:34:54,872 --> 01:34:56,340
Little tragedies are
952
01:34:56,374 --> 01:34:58,309
difficult to keep straight.
953
01:35:03,614 --> 01:35:07,286
Chronology convinces us we are
moving toward a real place.
954
01:35:07,318 --> 01:35:09,487
Swimmers,
to your marks.
955
01:35:10,955 --> 01:35:12,523
A gunshot.
956
01:35:12,557 --> 01:35:15,092
A gunshot released
our tense flesh.
957
01:35:16,561 --> 01:35:18,863
Fathers were often uncontainable
958
01:35:18,896 --> 01:35:21,666
while the little women
swam for their lives.
959
01:35:21,699 --> 01:35:22,767
Swim.
960
01:35:24,169 --> 01:35:25,603
Swim!
961
01:35:26,103 --> 01:35:27,605
Hurry!
962
01:35:28,739 --> 01:35:30,341
Come on, baby.
963
01:35:31,709 --> 01:35:32,710
Harder.
964
01:35:33,145 --> 01:35:34,345
Harder!
965
01:35:35,012 --> 01:35:36,114
Faster!
966
01:35:36,148 --> 01:35:39,350
A cacophony of men swelling
967
01:35:39,383 --> 01:35:43,020
and pressing down
on the wet motion.
968
01:35:44,856 --> 01:35:48,926
How many times did I slip
into the chlorinated depths,
969
01:35:49,827 --> 01:35:54,166
secretly hoping to
shed this useless skin
970
01:35:54,199 --> 01:35:57,501
and emerge something
971
01:36:01,772 --> 01:36:02,907
amphibious
972
01:36:05,310 --> 01:36:06,644
and without gender?
973
01:36:15,419 --> 01:36:16,621
The thing is,
974
01:36:20,625 --> 01:36:23,928
this letting everything in
975
01:36:25,596 --> 01:36:27,965
and waiting to
see what comes out
976
01:36:31,802 --> 01:36:32,803
is creepy
977
01:36:34,373 --> 01:36:35,573
and idiotic.
978
01:36:37,575 --> 01:36:41,313
And it's starting
to piss me off
979
01:36:41,346 --> 01:36:45,449
that I have to even
think about that hole.
980
01:36:46,184 --> 01:36:47,518
What I am saying is
981
01:36:52,257 --> 01:36:56,994
there is a woman in a room who
is tired of looking down
982
01:37:00,198 --> 01:37:01,532
and bleeding
983
01:37:02,700 --> 01:37:03,601
and--
984
01:37:03,634 --> 01:37:06,971
bearing and itching and aching.
985
01:37:08,506 --> 01:37:12,476
And tired of remaining open
986
01:37:12,510 --> 01:37:16,114
with no hope of
suturing herself up.
987
01:37:26,657 --> 01:37:28,693
It isn't that I want it gone.
988
01:37:32,830 --> 01:37:33,831
It's that
989
01:37:34,865 --> 01:37:35,866
I want
990
01:37:36,834 --> 01:37:37,835
wanting
991
01:37:39,637 --> 01:37:43,007
to come from somewhere else.
992
01:37:48,679 --> 01:37:53,118
There are moments between years
that surface with great force."
993
01:37:54,785 --> 01:37:56,754
Remind me
why we're here.
994
01:37:56,787 --> 01:37:59,124
I thought
this was your idea.
995
01:37:59,157 --> 01:38:00,624
I came here with you.
996
01:38:05,163 --> 01:38:06,164
Delusion.
997
01:38:08,699 --> 01:38:10,168
Grown women are idiots.
998
01:38:12,270 --> 01:38:13,271
I don't know.
999
01:38:14,473 --> 01:38:15,673
She begged.
1000
01:38:22,314 --> 01:38:23,647
I changed my name.
1001
01:38:30,054 --> 01:38:31,055
Mike!
1002
01:38:32,290 --> 01:38:34,692
Lidia! Lidia!
1003
01:38:35,394 --> 01:38:37,628
Lidia! Lidia!
1004
01:38:38,196 --> 01:38:39,964
Mike! Lidia!
1005
01:38:40,232 --> 01:38:41,799
Lidia!
1006
01:38:41,832 --> 01:38:43,901
Turn him over.
Help me!
1007
01:39:03,488 --> 01:39:04,688
"Kill.
1008
01:39:06,224 --> 01:39:08,260
Or suck the killing back.
1009
01:39:13,131 --> 01:39:14,565
And pump it
1010
01:39:15,566 --> 01:39:19,204
into the story of someone else.
1011
01:39:21,972 --> 01:39:26,077
My father lost his
memory from hypoxia that day.
1012
01:39:30,781 --> 01:39:32,583
I did not kill him.
1013
01:39:34,519 --> 01:39:35,953
I did not save him.
1014
01:39:37,922 --> 01:39:41,992
I am learning to live on land."
1015
01:39:45,130 --> 01:39:46,131
Um,
1016
01:39:50,734 --> 01:39:52,970
Thanks. Oh, that -- that's...
1017
01:40:07,319 --> 01:40:09,019
But have your
parents read this story?
1018
01:40:09,053 --> 01:40:11,223
What do they think of it?
1019
01:40:11,256 --> 01:40:12,124
Enjoy New York. Really.
1020
01:40:12,157 --> 01:40:13,991
You're gonna get an
agent outta this.
1021
01:40:17,094 --> 01:40:18,796
Lidia,
it's so nice to meet you.
1022
01:40:18,829 --> 01:40:20,298
Thank you for being here.
1023
01:40:20,698 --> 01:40:21,899
Excuse me.
1024
01:40:23,201 --> 01:40:24,768
Do you have anything, um,
1025
01:40:26,138 --> 01:40:27,638
a little stronger?
1026
01:40:29,006 --> 01:40:30,007
Thanks.
1027
01:40:34,845 --> 01:40:37,081
Carol Houck Smith,
Norton Publishing.
1028
01:40:39,184 --> 01:40:41,685
It's pretty impressive
what you did up there.
1029
01:40:43,087 --> 01:40:44,256
Thank you.
1030
01:40:44,289 --> 01:40:48,226
No, really. It didn't look easy.
1031
01:40:49,361 --> 01:40:52,397
Tell me, is there any
more where that came from?
1032
01:40:52,430 --> 01:40:55,634
Something, a little longer?
1033
01:40:58,736 --> 01:41:00,771
You should send me something.
1034
01:41:05,477 --> 01:41:06,944
It's just that
1035
01:41:09,780 --> 01:41:13,817
something in me had been born
1036
01:41:15,387 --> 01:41:16,388
still.
1037
01:41:24,094 --> 01:41:25,729
♪ And there you got me ♪
1038
01:41:25,763 --> 01:41:27,064
♪ That's how you got me ♪
1039
01:41:27,097 --> 01:41:29,367
♪ You taught me to be mean ♪
1040
01:41:34,239 --> 01:41:35,574
♪ But I ♪
1041
01:41:35,607 --> 01:41:37,142
♪ Ran out ♪
1042
01:41:37,175 --> 01:41:43,047
♪ Of white dove's feathers ♪
1043
01:41:43,080 --> 01:41:45,716
♪ To soak up the hot ♪
1044
01:41:45,749 --> 01:41:48,386
♪ Piss that comes
through your mouth ♪
1045
01:41:48,420 --> 01:41:50,854
It's a small stone I carry.
1046
01:41:52,557 --> 01:41:53,757
♪ Ohh ♪
1047
01:41:54,825 --> 01:41:57,629
Shame of wantingsomething good.
1048
01:41:57,662 --> 01:42:02,133
♪ Of white dove's feathers... ♪
1049
01:44:42,193 --> 01:44:44,763
I told you
not to fuck with me, bitch!
1050
01:44:44,796 --> 01:44:48,199
- I told you.
- And you.
1051
01:44:56,708 --> 01:44:58,476
I'm fucking trash.
1052
01:45:00,645 --> 01:45:04,182
Hey, what are you
doing? Keep it moving.
1053
01:45:22,333 --> 01:45:23,334
Hi.
1054
01:45:27,138 --> 01:45:29,940
Chopping block. Peer review.
1055
01:45:30,608 --> 01:45:32,110
Who wants to go first?
1056
01:45:33,478 --> 01:45:34,512
Really helpful.
1057
01:45:35,447 --> 01:45:37,582
You know, you can't
live the wrong life.
1058
01:45:37,615 --> 01:45:39,350
You really can't. It's
a story you were told.
1059
01:45:39,384 --> 01:45:41,352
Your one is just as
important, it's your own.
1060
01:45:41,386 --> 01:45:44,955
You have to -- It has to
hurt. But I'm excited for you.
1061
01:46:36,574 --> 01:46:38,041
I don't give a shit!
1062
01:46:38,075 --> 01:46:39,544
Now what?
1063
01:46:41,646 --> 01:46:43,046
Something small
1064
01:46:43,080 --> 01:46:45,048
and specific caught my eye,
1065
01:46:45,082 --> 01:46:46,851
an important detail --
1066
01:46:46,885 --> 01:46:50,221
a bruise on the bridge of
her nose letting me know that
1067
01:46:50,255 --> 01:46:51,923
her eyes were blue
like mine.
1068
01:46:51,956 --> 01:46:53,157
Hey!
1069
01:46:55,426 --> 01:46:56,427
How much?
1070
01:46:59,062 --> 01:47:02,567
I pay her pimp
$100. I ask her in.
1071
01:47:03,234 --> 01:47:04,702
I tell her to sit down.
1072
01:47:08,573 --> 01:47:10,341
In the story,
I say,
1073
01:47:10,375 --> 01:47:12,443
"This is what itfeels like to be me."
1074
01:47:14,112 --> 01:47:16,614
A woman who teaches English,
1075
01:47:16,648 --> 01:47:20,083
looking down at a woman whosucks dicks all day
1076
01:47:20,118 --> 01:47:23,187
as she sits on mycouch, smoking.
1077
01:47:25,290 --> 01:47:28,726
When I look at her,I think she looks like Mary.
1078
01:47:30,528 --> 01:47:33,698
WheneverI see an image of Christ ,
1079
01:47:33,731 --> 01:47:36,301
I picture Mary sodrawn and gaunt and tired
1080
01:47:36,334 --> 01:47:38,202
and angry to thepoint of emaciation
1081
01:47:38,236 --> 01:47:40,772
that she can barelywear her own face.
1082
01:47:51,015 --> 01:47:53,585
In the story, I say,
1083
01:47:55,987 --> 01:47:57,355
"What am I gonna do?
1084
01:47:58,756 --> 01:47:59,757
Teach her?"
1085
01:48:02,493 --> 01:48:06,731
This is what me, an
addict, upwardly mobile,
1086
01:48:06,764 --> 01:48:09,734
given something as
infinitesimally small
1087
01:48:09,767 --> 01:48:12,604
as words to believe in, thinks.
1088
01:48:12,637 --> 01:48:15,740
I'm looking at her.
1089
01:48:19,143 --> 01:48:20,645
Offer words.
1090
01:48:34,192 --> 01:48:37,428
People say
to me all the time,
1091
01:48:37,462 --> 01:48:41,432
"Did the things in your short
stories actually happen?"
1092
01:48:44,535 --> 01:48:46,237
Isn't that the--
1093
01:48:46,804 --> 01:48:48,139
the question
1094
01:48:49,207 --> 01:48:50,808
when it comes to life?
1095
01:48:56,814 --> 01:48:58,583
Did this really happen to me?
1096
01:49:07,558 --> 01:49:08,559
Andy.
1097
01:49:10,561 --> 01:49:11,562
I don't know.
1098
01:49:19,470 --> 01:49:22,573
The things thathappen to us are true.
1099
01:49:24,776 --> 01:49:28,713
But writing is awhole other body.
1100
01:49:29,781 --> 01:49:32,583
I was hoping we could
discuss my manuscript.
1101
01:49:33,985 --> 01:49:36,688
Oh. Of course. Yeah.
1102
01:49:39,257 --> 01:49:41,359
I also want to loan you my car.
1103
01:49:45,029 --> 01:49:46,964
Saw you were taking the bus, and
1104
01:49:48,167 --> 01:49:49,867
I happen to have two cars.
1105
01:50:04,582 --> 01:50:05,583
Hey.
1106
01:50:28,239 --> 01:50:29,540
You can tell a
lot about a person
1107
01:50:29,574 --> 01:50:31,375
from seeing them in the water.
1108
01:50:33,311 --> 01:50:34,512
Thank you.
1109
01:50:37,715 --> 01:50:40,418
-For what?
-For letting me swim with you.
1110
01:50:41,120 --> 01:50:42,620
I read a couple of your stories.
1111
01:50:42,653 --> 01:50:44,822
I know that
swimming's a big deal.
1112
01:50:46,158 --> 01:50:48,025
I always let my students
choose the venue.
1113
01:50:49,228 --> 01:50:50,428
You know,
I wanted to say
1114
01:50:50,461 --> 01:50:52,830
I've seen you a couple
of times before.
1115
01:50:52,864 --> 01:50:55,333
Yeah, I read about Ken
Kesey teaching at U of O
1116
01:50:55,366 --> 01:50:57,769
when I was abroad, and I
applied to the program,
1117
01:50:57,802 --> 01:50:59,403
but it already happened.
1118
01:51:00,239 --> 01:51:01,806
No shit. That's funny.
1119
01:51:01,839 --> 01:51:03,441
Yeah, I know.
1120
01:51:03,474 --> 01:51:05,210
And then I seen
you stomping around
1121
01:51:05,244 --> 01:51:06,778
the creative writing department.
1122
01:51:08,646 --> 01:51:10,648
I was in the reading
you gave at Gerlinger.
1123
01:51:13,818 --> 01:51:14,952
Wow. That's...
1124
01:51:18,356 --> 01:51:20,558
That's weird. Weird.
1125
01:51:24,263 --> 01:51:25,997
That was a weird day for me.
1126
01:51:28,833 --> 01:51:29,834
Why?
1127
01:51:38,709 --> 01:51:39,710
My father
1128
01:51:42,847 --> 01:51:43,848
was--my--
1129
01:51:45,117 --> 01:51:46,317
my father...
1130
01:51:49,921 --> 01:51:51,355
Your father?
1131
01:51:53,391 --> 01:51:54,592
Was abusive.
1132
01:51:58,062 --> 01:51:59,030
Your father.
1133
01:52:02,134 --> 01:52:03,334
How so?
1134
01:52:05,770 --> 01:52:06,771
Sexual.
1135
01:52:07,405 --> 01:52:08,606
Oh.
1136
01:52:10,374 --> 01:52:11,576
That sucks.
1137
01:52:20,785 --> 01:52:23,921
I hope something karmically
fucked happened to him.
1138
01:52:25,290 --> 01:52:26,490
Yeah.
1139
01:52:29,627 --> 01:52:31,529
It kind of actually--it did.
1140
01:52:32,964 --> 01:52:34,233
Excellent, then.
1141
01:52:40,339 --> 01:52:41,873
Uh, I, um--
1142
01:52:42,540 --> 01:52:44,176
Blah. It was a long time ago.
1143
01:52:44,209 --> 01:52:46,377
I was a totally
different person then.
1144
01:52:48,045 --> 01:52:49,513
So who are you now?
1145
01:52:52,049 --> 01:52:53,384
I'm your teacher.
1146
01:52:59,957 --> 01:53:02,560
So, Teach, are you
gonna take my car?
1147
01:53:26,484 --> 01:53:28,052
I don't quiteknow how to tell you
1148
01:53:28,085 --> 01:53:29,720
what it feels like.
1149
01:53:32,623 --> 01:53:35,793
Watching the littlewoman swim for her life.
1150
01:53:39,063 --> 01:53:40,965
I mean.
1151
01:54:02,220 --> 01:54:04,122
Are you fucking insane?
1152
01:54:11,729 --> 01:54:12,730
No.
1153
01:54:22,274 --> 01:54:24,008
You think I'm someone else.
1154
01:54:25,776 --> 01:54:26,777
Hm-mm.
1155
01:54:32,117 --> 01:54:33,884
I can see the mother in you.
1156
01:54:43,561 --> 01:54:46,164
There's more to your
story than you think.
1157
01:56:41,179 --> 01:56:44,615
- Oh it's, very nice.
- This is it.
1158
01:56:44,648 --> 01:56:46,151
Very nice.
1159
01:56:47,419 --> 01:56:49,221
Well, we're just gonna
go this way, sir, on the left.
1160
01:56:49,254 --> 01:56:50,621
Oh.
1161
01:57:10,841 --> 01:57:13,043
What about the room?
1162
01:57:13,077 --> 01:57:15,280
They said it would
be ready tomorrow for sure.
1163
01:57:15,547 --> 01:57:16,747
Okay.
1164
01:57:20,185 --> 01:57:22,953
That must have been
a very weird ride.
1165
01:57:28,627 --> 01:57:29,827
Thank you.
1166
01:57:30,961 --> 01:57:32,830
You don't ever have
to say thank you to me.
1167
01:57:40,172 --> 01:57:41,672
I'm good.
1168
01:57:42,207 --> 01:57:43,208
Yeah?
1169
01:57:43,941 --> 01:57:45,075
Yeah.
1170
01:57:59,191 --> 01:58:00,358
Hi, Dad.
1171
01:58:00,392 --> 01:58:01,792
Marilou?
1172
01:58:02,394 --> 01:58:04,094
No. It's me. It's Lidia.
1173
01:58:04,895 --> 01:58:06,431
I know that, kiddo.
1174
01:58:17,775 --> 01:58:19,110
I read that book.
1175
01:58:20,010 --> 01:58:21,712
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
1176
01:58:23,381 --> 01:58:24,982
Do you know who wrote it?
1177
01:58:25,550 --> 01:58:26,750
Oh.
1178
01:58:29,554 --> 01:58:30,754
You.
1179
01:58:31,590 --> 01:58:32,756
That's right.
1180
01:58:36,428 --> 01:58:38,296
Did you read all of the stories?
1181
01:58:38,330 --> 01:58:39,297
I, uh,
1182
01:58:40,998 --> 01:58:42,967
There was one about swimming.
1183
01:58:45,670 --> 01:58:46,870
I liked that.
1184
01:58:49,106 --> 01:58:50,108
Thank you.
1185
01:58:52,210 --> 01:58:54,412
Not very flattering
of me, though.
1186
01:58:57,449 --> 01:58:59,150
That's fair enough.
1187
01:58:59,184 --> 01:59:00,185
Ah.
1188
01:59:08,092 --> 01:59:11,895
You know, I won a
prize for that story.
1189
01:59:13,298 --> 01:59:14,798
I got to go to New York.
1190
01:59:21,172 --> 01:59:22,173
Huh.
1191
01:59:24,576 --> 01:59:26,478
Well, isn't that something, huh?
1192
01:59:31,316 --> 01:59:32,450
It's beautiful here.
1193
01:59:35,886 --> 01:59:38,022
It's a real home you have here.
1194
01:59:43,194 --> 01:59:44,229
Well done.
1195
01:59:45,563 --> 01:59:46,564
Well done, you.
1196
01:59:48,633 --> 01:59:51,068
The safest memoriesare locked away in the brains
1197
01:59:51,101 --> 01:59:52,504
of people who can't remember.
1198
01:59:52,537 --> 01:59:55,307
Oh, oh! Get her,
Mike! Get her, Mike!
1199
01:59:57,575 --> 01:59:59,076
You know I don't swim.
Claudia, go get your sister.
1200
02:00:01,045 --> 02:00:03,214
Underwater forever.
1201
02:00:05,583 --> 02:00:07,218
There you go, pal.
1202
02:00:08,753 --> 02:00:10,821
Look, I'm doing 'wimming.
1203
02:00:11,189 --> 02:00:14,225
Wow!
1204
02:00:22,866 --> 02:00:24,101
What's wrong?
1205
02:00:24,135 --> 02:00:25,903
The water will go in my
1206
02:00:25,936 --> 02:00:29,441
nose and ears and into my brain.
1207
02:00:31,409 --> 02:00:32,976
Uh, Miles?
1208
02:00:35,747 --> 02:00:38,616
How many times have you seen
1209
02:00:38,650 --> 02:00:41,252
Mama swimming and swimming laps?
1210
02:00:43,154 --> 02:00:45,490
-Lots of times, right?
-Yeah.
1211
02:00:45,523 --> 02:00:48,760
Have you ever noticed
1212
02:00:48,793 --> 02:00:52,029
that I've never got
water in my brain?
1213
02:00:55,233 --> 02:00:57,268
Water's never gone
into my brain.
1214
02:00:57,836 --> 02:00:59,036
You want to see?
1215
02:00:59,069 --> 02:01:00,772
-Huh.
-Watch this.
1216
02:01:00,805 --> 02:01:02,507
Tell me how much water
goes in my brain.
1217
02:01:02,540 --> 02:01:03,541
-Okay?
-Okay.
1218
02:01:14,119 --> 02:01:15,253
See?
1219
02:01:15,286 --> 02:01:16,287
Mm-hmm.
1220
02:01:16,821 --> 02:01:18,189
Okay, pull.
1221
02:01:18,223 --> 02:01:21,024
I have a very
important game.
1222
02:01:22,960 --> 02:01:25,830
I'm gonna put my
whole head underwater.
1223
02:01:26,865 --> 02:01:28,065
Okay.
1224
02:01:28,098 --> 02:01:31,068
And we look at
each other underwater.
1225
02:01:32,970 --> 02:01:35,540
-What game is this?
-I made it up.
1226
02:01:48,085 --> 02:01:49,554
The key is,
1227
02:01:51,556 --> 02:01:52,557
make up shit.
1228
02:02:02,333 --> 02:02:05,470
I'm not speaking out of myasshole when I say this.
1229
02:02:07,739 --> 02:02:08,939
Come in.
1230
02:02:12,075 --> 02:02:13,611
The water will hold you.
1231
02:04:53,571 --> 02:04:56,274
Anything.Anywhere. Anytime.
80125
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.