Original subtitles

Yo, steve, let me use Laura's laptop.

I wanna surf the net.

They got a new website I wanna check out:

Big bootie.Com.

Sorry, eddo, but I'm In the middle of something Very important.

Man, you're playing Spacedome.

That's not important!

It is when you're On level 6.

Come on, steve. Let me have it.

Hey, don't touch My mouse!

Give me it! Will you-- Hey! Hey!

Look what you did. Look what you did.

Oh...

Boy.

Oh...

Oh, boy.

Oh, this thing Is totally totaled.

Man! Laura's gonna Be so mad.

Here she comes. Hide it. Hurry up. Hurry up.

Hurry up! Hurry up!

Okay, okay. Alright.

Sit down.

Hi, laura. Hey, Look who's here, eddo.

It's your sister laura.

Yeah, that's Right, steve.

It's laura, My sister.

Hey.

Well, what's going on?

Nothing. Nothing.

I don't have time for this. I got a term paper to do.

On your laptop?

No, I thought I'd do it in crayon.

Crayon! Crayon!

I know. Right. Uh-huh.

Steve, steve, maybe We should tell her.

What do you mean?

[voices overlapping]

Tell me what?

Uh, well, um--um--um,

You can't use Your laptop right now.

Why not?

Well, I, uh...

I forgot why, But eddo knows why,

So, eddo, You tell her why.

You--you--you Tell her why.

Well, uh, See, laura,

Uh, steve has A homeboy,

Uh, who's agreed To download Your computer

With the latest Software.

But I already have The latest software.

Oh, no, no, no.

This ware Is much softer.

Uh, it has An ebonics Spellcheck.

It really do.

But I need it back By wednesday.

Hey, you will have it.

Wednesday it is.

Alright.

Alright, now. Okay.

Wednesday.

Yeah, that's right.

[knock on door]

It's open.

Excuse me, commissioner. You wanted to see me?

Yes, I did. Come on in.

So, how are The mean streets?

Oh, cranky as ever, sir.

You know, I envy you out there In that concrete jungle

Getting shot at In dark alleys,

Slapping cuffs On dirtbags.

Perhaps you'd Like to go on patrol With me sometime, sir.

What, are you crazy? I'd get killed out there.

Well, shall I Take a seat, sir?

Naw. You're not gonna Be here that long.

We got a fax From the detroit police.

We got a guy up there Bouncing checks.

They've traced him here To chicago.

Well, that's not usually Our department, sir.

I know that, but I want you To take care of this.

Well, very good, sir. What's his name?

Winslow.

Yes, sir?

The perp's name is winslow.

Oh! I thought-- I thought you--

His name is winslow?

I'm afraid so.

Franklin aloysius winslow.

Well...

That's my brother Frank.

I don't believe this. My brother frank is Passing bad checks?

Several thousand Dollars worth.

I wanted you to hear it From me first.

Well, that's...

Very sensitive of you, sir.

Not really. I like Giving out bad news.

That's a joke, winslow.

And a real knee-slapper It is, too, sir.

Now, listen...

If your brother Is in chicago,

Would he get In touch with you?

He might, sir.

And you might Be tempted to look The other way,

Forget you're a cop.

No...Sir.

I took an oath.

And the oath says That I'm a cop first...

And a brother second.

I sure wish all my men Were like you.

Thank you, sir.

Carl...

Yes?

I'm sorry.

Thanks.

[blows whistle]

Hi!

Can I help you?

First you can give me A great big hug.

You better Get back, jack!

Wait, wait, wait. Hold it.

Harriette, it's me, frank, Your brother-in-law.

Frank winslow?

Uh-huh.

Is that you Under there?

Honest. No...

[squeak squeak squeak]

Clowning around.

Frank! Frank, it's So good to see you.

Yeah!

Boy, you look Terrific.

10 years, and you Haven't aged a bit.

And you look...

You look happy.

Frank. Well...

What are you doing In that costume?

I am traveling with The sullivan family Carnival!

Is, uh, carl home?

No, he's still at work.

Oh, frank, he's gonna be So disappointed he missed you.

Oh...

I'm not so sure About that, harriette.

You know...

It's been 10 years Since we talked.

He still hasn't Forgiven me

For not coming To our father's funeral.

I was hoping That maybe we could...

Clear the air.

Well, frank, carl will Be home around 6:00.

Why don't you join us For dinner tonight?

You know, carl's A little easier to talk to On a full stomach.

Thanks. I'll be here.

Alright.

Oh, the carnival Is at rolling meadows,

So if you guys Wanna catch my act...

[honk honk honk]

I'll leave you some passes. We'd love it.

And listen. Warn the kids.

The beanbag toss is rigged.

[whistle]

Bye.

Bye, frank.

Eddo, look! The carnival's in town,

And they're having A tough man competition Tonight.

So?

So looky here.

All you have to do Is last 60 seconds With the champ butterball,

And you win 3 grand.

That's exactly The amount of money That we need

To buy laura A new laptop.

Butterball?

Yeah.

Man, you must Be crazy.

Look at that monster. He's a truck with teeth.

He'll kill me.

No, siree, bob,

'cause this baby's Gonna save your butt.

Well, what is it?

It's that little round thing On the back of your body.

Not my butt. What's that?

The belt you can wear So no one can hurt you.

Wow. What do you call it?

The belt you can wear So no one can hurt you.

Observe.

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Okay, now try and hit me.

Steve, if I hit you, You'll be taking A major dirt nap.

Yeah, yeah. I'll take that risk.

Just come on. Slug me.

Right here.

Alright. Put 'er there.

Okay.

Ooh. Ow!

What the heck was that?

That, my friend, Was the electromagnetic Force field

I just invented.

Wow!

[force field hums]

That's amazing. How does it work?

A plutonium battery pack In my belt

Charges the ions Around my body,

Converting The electromagnetic power

Into an invisible shield.

Yo, steve, You are the man!

Ooh.

Hi, honey.

How was your day?

Terrible.

Well, I've got A surprise for you

That'll cheer you up.

Please, harriette.

No more surprises.

I've had Enough surprises For one day.

[knock on door]

There he is now.

There who is?

Hi, frank.

Hi, harriette.

Carl.

Frank.

Didn't I tell you

I had a big surprise For you, carl?

Yes, you did, harriette.

It's good to see you, carl.

I just wish I could say the same, frank.

What do you mean, carl?

You're under arrest.

What?

Carl!

You have the right To remain silent.

Anything you say Can and will be used Against you

In a court of law.

Good evening, Ladies and gentlemen!

The sullivan family carnival Is proud to present

Its most popular Attraction--

Countdown to cash!

Anyone who can last One minute in the ring

With the world-famous butterball

Will receive $3,000!

And now the moment You've all been waiting for,

The b-big, the b-bold, The not so b-b-b-b-beautiful

Mr. Butterball!

[booing]

Aah! Ruff ruff!

Egads! It's a tank With eyebrows!

Remember, Challengers can use Any form of self-defense.

But absolutely no weapons!

So, let's bring on Our first challenger.

B-b-b-b-bill babcock!

[cheering and booing]

Argh!

Oh, man.

Oh, man.

Will you just Listen to me?

You'll have Plenty of time

To tell your side Of the story To the judge, frank.

You act like You're enjoying this.

Is this your way Of getting back at me

For not going To dad's funeral?

You should have Been there, frank!

Mama was devastated.

I couldn't, carl.

I just couldn't be there.

Well, what did you do, frank?

Did you have A hot date?

Did you lose all your money Gambling at the racetrack?

I didn't go because I just Couldn't handle the fact

That dad was...Gone.

Well, why didn't you Tell me this before, frank?

I tried, carl.

But when you didn't Return my tenth phone call,

I just gave up.

It was hard For me at the funeral, too,

But I was there, frank.

I made a lot of mistakes In the past, carl.

And I like to think That I've changed.

I'm a different man now.

Oh, yeah. You're passing Bad checks.

I see I'm just Wasting my breath With you.

Just hold on, you two.

Frank, what really happened With the checks?

About a year ago,

I got a job Managing a restaurant.

Things were going great.

Then all of a sudden, The place went bankrupt,

And I was out of a job.

See, there you are.

No job, Passing bum checks.

My paycheck bounced.

The personal Checks I wrote,

I thought they were Good at the time That I wrote them.

It happens, carl.

We know people That that's happened to.

Well, are you at least Looking for a job, frank?

I've got a job.

I'm a clown... With a traveling carnival.

A clown?

Hey, don't laugh.

Well, actually, You're supposed to laugh.

But it's a steady job,

And I make good money.

Carl, you should See him in his makeup.

He's so cute.

I'm not going To arrest you, frank.

You're not?

No.

How come?

Because I'm going To loan you the money

To pay off the debt.

I can't let you Do that, carl.

Yes, you can, Frank...

Because We are brothers.

And brothers Are supposed To stick together.

I just wish that...

That you felt Close enough to come To me before.

See? There you go, carl.

Being there for me.

And now our last challenger Of the evening,

Eddie w-w-w-winslow!

This shouldn't Take long. Hah!

Alright, eddo, now,

He can't hurt you While this force field Surrounds you.

You'll be Perfectly safe.

Good luck.

Yahh! Ooh!

[bell dings]

[cheering]

Aah!

What was that?!

Hey, steve, It's working!

It's working!

Of course it is! Now get him.

Don't stand there. Come on, butterball, hit him.

Argh!

Argh!

[crowd gasps]

Keep it up, eddo! You're almost halfway home!

Get up! Get up!

[imitating muhammad ali] Float like a butterfly, Sting like a bee.

I'm so pretty.

110 fights, and I'm still pretty.

You can't beat me. I can't be beat.

Come on.

Aah!

Oh, yeah!

Come on!

Oh, steve, What's happening?

The moisture From your sweat

Must be shorting out The electrical pulses.

Try to stand still And think dry.

Whoa!

Wuh-oh.

Oh. Oh.

Eddo, eddo, Be careful, eddo.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha!

Eddie! Eddie!

Eddie. Eddie, are you okay?

Hi, grandma. Want to play twister?

Grandma?

[crowd boos]

Are there any more Challengers?

Any more challengers?

Come on. There's got to be One more sucker--

I mean, brave soul.

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

Alright, come on, Butterball, let's go.

I'll buy you a side of beef.

Not so fast, buttercup.

There's one more Challenger.

Where?

You're looking at him.

No, I'm laughing At him.

Ha ha ha ha.

Steve, What are you doing?

The belt's broken. He'll kill you.

Not if He can't catch me.

If there's one thing I'm good at,

It's outrunning big guys Who try to hurt me.

I took a class on it At the "Y."

[bell dings]

Argh!

Aah!

Alright, steve!

[steve buzzing]

[crowd boos]

Boo!

Boo! Boo! Boo! Boo!

Boo!

Alright, steve! Keep it up!

[bell dings]

Show me the money! Show me the money!

I see the money!

I see the money!