Original subtitles

So what do you think?

Like, I know it sounds crazy, but Scout's Honor, that's what happened.

And I clearly think Caligula's not that bad of a guy. He's not a bad rap.

Are you taking acid at night? No, I swear what that guy said in the police

report is true.

At night, life comes to light. Everyone, Faker, John Holmes, Caligula, Marilyn

Chambers.

I don't know. It just sounds really crazy, Larry.

After your shift, stay here with me tonight, and I'll show you. This place

magical. Are you sure you're not some kind of wacky, creepy guy? I've dealt

enough wacky, creepy guys in my life. I am not wacky, I swear.

Look, fail today.

Please.

Okay, Larry.

Does this... When is this supposed to start?

Um, any minute. It'll happen when you least expect it. That one, it just

happens.

So what happens? Do you just hear rockets and bombs bursting in the air?

Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.

Harry, Linda, I want you to meet my friend Emily. She also works at the

Oh, my gosh.

Wow.

Hi, Emily. Nice to meet you.

Hello there, Emily.

I'm Dr. Reams. I'm a sexual therapist.

Would you care for an examination?

I'm good, thank you.

But it is an honor to meet both of you and Miss Lovelace. You have been an

inspiration to women with deep throating.

What's that?

Oh, we haven't gotten that far in the script yet.

You know what I mean?

So, Miss Lovelace, shall we begin your examination?

Hello,

Larry.

Do I get a chance tonight with the Fosse tour guide?

We can do it three -way.

Oh, hi, John.

Emily, John Holmes.

Hi, John. I love your film.

Nice, John.

Nice.

Hi, Larry.

Will we pick up where we left off the other night? You know I love women.

Seika?

Emily. Emily.

Seika. Hi, Seika.

It's a pleasure to meet you.

You've got a handful with that one, honey.

I'm here to help if you need me.

Seika, tonight I'm giving Emily a tour of the museum.

What does it mean that you're a handful?

Oh, her?

Who knows? You know porn stars. They're all liars.

Come on. I'm going to put you up.

Okay.

This is amazing, Larry.

I knew there was so much more to this place than it seemed. I could feel it.

was the energy.

I mean, I would give all these tours and I'd show the people all these

artifacts.

And I would just get so excited, and now I know why.

Because it's all alive.

Well, Dr. Ream says it's because it's on a space -time continuum.

But I don't know, maybe there's a magic dildo or an ancient Egyptian artifact.

You know, like one of those museum movies.

You know, we do have those Egyptian phalluses.

There you go.

but he got a bum rap.

You know, if I was his intern, I'd be sucking his cock every day, too.

Wow, Emily, I never realized you were so into politics.

I mean, I just like men in charge.

I've got a lot of fantasies, and when a man's in charge, it just does something

to me.

I mean, I would suck his cock every day.

I mean, I would imagine interns suck a lot of cock.

Yeah, they probably do.

You know, it's funny.

I spend all day talking about fantasies, giving tours, yet I practice

none of mine.

I think it's because I have nobody to do it with.

What? You're so beautiful. How is that possible if you don't have a man in your

life?

I think it's because I have intimacy issues.

You know, I've never slept with the same guy more than once.

It's like I run away and hide or something.

Like, what's up with that?

Like, how am I ever going to fulfill any of my fantasies when all I can have is

a one -night stand?

It's really harsh.

So, what about you, Larry?

Do you have a girlfriend?

No, not for a while now.

She told me, like, six months ago when I lost my job, I moved out here, worked

at a casino. It just didn't work out.

So, have you ever tied a girl up?

No.

No, I've got a lot of fantasies.

Like, being back in the 70s and sucking off guys in peep shows or, you know,

going to a glory hole.

Too many. I don't know, you know, I just, I think it's hot. Making a porno

people watching me having sex or sucking cock.

It's hot.

Yes, it is warm in here.

You okay, Emily?

Yeah.

Can you take a hint, Larry?

you know

Oh, my God.

Yes

Yes, show me, show me, show me, show me.

Go, go, go. Oh, my God.

Yes.

Oh, fuck.

Oh,

my God.

So fucking good.

You'll like it. You'll like it.

Oh, my God.

Yes. God, that feels really good.

Yes, yes, yes.

I don't fucking know. I'm going to come here and talk.

She was acting weird all day. Just wasn't herself.

She wouldn't tell me anything, and she just leaves.

Oh, hope she didn't quit.

Quit?

Look, she loves this place.

It's her life.

As long as I've known her, she has never, ever, ever left early.

Maybe you know something.

No, no, nothing.

I'm going to go get ready.

What am I going to do?

You want to replace her?

She's great. Cute little nerd.

I'm screwed.

Come on, get out of here.

Come on, get out.

Go on, get out.

Hey.

Hey, come on.

Whoever's in there, come on, the museum's closed.

I thought you left.

Get in.

Get your cock out of here. Get in.

Sweet throat, open wide for my love.

Sweet throat, try not to choke.

I'm gonna explode, it ain't no joke.

Sweet throat.

But I might as well grab his hand and put it to my pussy at that point. Yeah,

then you take his hand and shove it on your snap. What you are looking for is

right in this museum.

And to your vagina.

That whatever you're looking for is right in this museum.

That whatever you're looking for is right here in this museum.

No, we're not. We're just watching these people.

Is there any more lights so I can properly see them while we talk?

Biggest robe social on when?

Oh, actually, are you calling from around Germany or are you calling from

museum?

Oh, okay.

Now, what is your name?

Okay, let me see. And what's it called?

A robe social?

Yeah. Is there anybody from the museum after this question?

Anybody here from the museum?

Is

there

a robe social coming up on? What's the date?

What's the date?

You've got a handful with that one, honey.

I'm here if you need help.

Why do I keep messing up the last fucking sentence?

June 20th?

Yes.

Yes, there is.

If she goes back in an hour, will she get you?

Yes.

Ask for Dr.

Victoria.

Not Ron Jeremy, doctor.

Ask for Dr. Victoria, yes.

Can I just see the paper?

Photographic.

Dr. Proctor. Thank you.

Bye -bye.

You captured a moment on your... Nicely done. Very smart.

It is a reality moment. You've had to shoot it with a camera. Very smart.

Faster. Stroke yourself. Up and down your whole body. You are a cock. Go.

Faster.

Excellent. Cut.

All right.

You are a cock.