Original subtitles

Hey buddy, how's it going?

Yeah, great stuff, mate.

Listen, just giving you the old RSVP for the wedding.

Yeah, no, exciting stuff, mate.

Plus one?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, put me down for one, yeah.

Don't worry about her name, fucking beautiful is what she is, mate, eh?

For the tables and that, yeah, yeah. No, it's Clementine.

Clementine, yeah.

Hardwood.

Yeah, Clementine Hardwood.

Yeah, traditional, isn't it? Yeah, that's... Alright.

Yeah.

Okay then, mate.

Pass my love on to the missus and all that.

Alright, see you soon.

Hey Rhiannon, how's it going? It's Big D.

Oh, Danny.

I didn't think I'd hear from you again.

It's been a while, right?

Yeah.

Look, random one.

Just wondered if you'd fancy joining me to this wedding.

It's really nice. Fancy spot, you know.

Bit of a game as well. You get to pretend that you've got a different name

actually be someone else.

Fuck off.

Fuck. Okay.

Hey Lana.

Danny, I wouldn't meet up with you again if you were the last guy on the planet

and the continued existence of the human race depended on it.

Hey babe, how's it going?

I can do it, Danny.

But I'd have to bring my husband with me.

Besides, I think they'd like to watch.

It can be a little bit hands -on. Might have a little bit of a grudge. But he'll

be on the leave. I can pull him back.

Hey, Liz.

Sienna.

Hey, darling, how's it going?

Sorry. Oh, do you know where you lost my mom at?

Hello? Wrong number. Sorry.

I suppose I'm just going to have to hire someone.

Russian brides.

You must be Alexandra.

Hi, is that you? Yeah, hi. Bring my bag.

Great for me.

Okay, sure.

Here

we

are. Is this contract?

Okay. Just sign.

Yep. What is the contract?

No question, just sign.

Okay.

That's cool.

Yeah. You have a dress for me? Ah, yes. A dress.

You'll be very happy. I've picked out a lovely dress.

I hate it. You disappoint me.

Disappoint you?

So, you owe me 50 pounds.

Is it in contract?

50 pounds?

Yeah. I will use my own dress.

Your own dress.

You like?

It's very beautiful.

I'm just not so sure about wearing a wedding dress to somebody else's

No, you're wrong. You also watch me dress.

You owe me 50 pounds.

Yeah. I'm hungry. You feed me. Cool.

Please,

help yourself.

Um, what time we have a taxi?

Um, at a... About ten minutes or so.

But I need to get the bow tie set if I'm straight.

I can help you, but you're only fifty pounds.

Appreciate it.

Oh! Oh my God!

You have such a big car. Yeah, that's great. Thank you.

That's really not the priority right now. It was the bow tie.

Oh, fine.

So as far as everyone's aware, you and me have been dating for quite some time.

We know a lot about each other.

Maybe we could just have a quick rehearsal of meeting the bride and

Yes, of course. It will cost you £200.

Whatever. Okay, so we're walking into the ceremony, meeting the bride and

Hello, guys. What a wonderful ceremony.

It is. It's Clementine.

I need to meet you. Danny has a big penis. No, no, no, no, no. Okay, no, no.

Forget the penis. Nothing about the penis.

Maybe you could say something nice about her dress.

Yeah.

Hi, I need to meet you. You have a sexy dress, but not sexy as mine.

Also, Danny has a big penis.

Don't touch me. Okay, wow. Okay. I'm sorry about that.

Maybe just don't mention the penis.

But I want to see it.

Come on, the car is going to be here any minute. You're trying to...

Don't shout me a penis.

Ugh, fine.

Wow, it's that thick.

Um, okay, I guess we have a couple of minutes.

Oh, Jesus.

Hello?

Yes, yes, no, we are going to be right down.

Okay.

Okay, yeah, no, I'm heading on down right now.

Okay, thank you.

Okay.

That's the car. We are going to be incredibly late. We do need to go. No,

will wait. I want to try a car.

I really don't think he's going to wait that long. You owe me another 500.

Now you fuck me.

Mm -hmm.

Yeah.

No.

I think... I think that was definitely worth it.