Original subtitles

(pleasant mellow music)

(Che growls)

(frantic music)

- Che, no!

- See, that's why he didn't touch his breakfast cabbage.

He's been holding out for a big fat yam.

(dramatic music)

(horn honks)

- Oh, hello Helen.

I heard I'll be judging you

on the Organic Gardening Club Tour.

When are you going to stark getting ready?

- We've actually been working for weeks, Margo.

- Oh, my mistake.

I feel awful.

- The Garden Club will be here in three days,

and I want in.

Everybody pop a salt tablet.

No more breaks.

(sniffs loudly)

- Rain.

(thunder crashes)

- How do you do that?

- This is okay.

We can work through it.

(sniffs loudly)

- More rain!

- Okay, let's not panic.

We can use this time to dress up the living room.

The Gardening Club is very selective,

so we need to show how diverse and multicultural we are.

- I'll wear Italian jeans.

- I'm from Africa.

- Yeah.

But maybe something a little more, Mahkiekin!

What can be more caring and multicultural

than sponsoring a Burmese child for 30 years?

Dear Mahkiekin, here's another $2.

I'm so glad to hear most of your family

made it through the monsoons.

- Even your imaginary friend is depressing.

- Mahkiekin is not imaginary.

(laughing)

This is perfect, we just need to clear a spot.

Some place high, where everyone can see it.

Like a beacon!

- Let me help you.

(yelps)

- Mom's dead, just like Bambi.

(groans loudly)

Mom's all better.

- My back!

(upbeat music)

(singing in foreign language)

♪ The Goode Family ♪

(upbeat music)

- Easy now, relax and let this healing compress

soothe away your aches.

- It smells!

- My purging compost.

- There's a reason for that

- I'm not giving up!

(moans in pain)

- Just relax.

We'll handle everything.

I'll take care of the household and Ubuntu and Bliss

will take care of the shopping.

- Cool! - Solid!

- Whoa, easy now.

We are on a super tight budget this month.

In fact, I'm going to start making our toothpaste.

- Oh great, carrot breath.

- What about the garden?

- Well, ehm.

- Gerald, this is our shot.

We need to hire a gardener.

- Helen, we don't hire people to do our work.

It's elitist and classist.

Do you think Al Gore has a staff of people helping him?

- I'm not talking about the staff.

(moans) Oh.

- Hey, I brought some pain pills for your back.

- Well, that's sweet of you,

but Helen never uses artificial painkillers.

- Those pink ones look pretty natural.

- Helen, stop.

(sighs)

We'll hire a gardener.

- My suggestion is you get yourself some of them

not so legals.

Find ones with a noisy backpack,

that's called a leaf blower,

it's a sign of status.

So you make the deal with him.

- I can't hire a crew of latino gardeners.

I'd feel like some sort of Conquistador.

- Oh.

- Hm.

- Gerald, we have to hire somebody.

- Okay, but we are not hiring any minorities

to do our dirty work.

That's racist!

It's whites only at the Goode house.

- You know what this is?

- Dad purse.

- It's more than that.

This is our chance to make some financial decisions

for ourselves.

- Oh.

- Come on, there must be something you want.

- No more landmines?

(sighs)

(gasps)

- If I get you one, Declan, will you promise not to lose it?

- No!

- Ok, and when these are gone,

we are going to have a conversation.

- No, we're not.

- Look, no poison.

Uh-oh.

- This is totally dented.

You gonna have to pay for it.

- We can't pay for it.

We won't have enough money to buy dad's

Flaxseed waffle mix.

- But that's what keeps him regular.

We need money.

- You could always trade up.

- Yea, trade up!

What's that?

- This guy started with a paper clip

and traded it for a pen.

Then he kept on on trading till he ended up with a house.

I'm gonna turn this pick to a recording studio.

(mellow music)

- Hmm.

(truck beeping)

(triumphant music)

Ah, white.

(bell ringing)

- Oh.

- I tried to trade the bottle for Ray's house.

He said no.

- We need to work our way up.

(moans in pain)

- Everybody the gardener is here.

- Thank God!

And he's...

- As the driven snow, Helen.

(horn honks)

(mellow music)

What?

Excuse me, men there seems to have been

some sort of misunderstanding.

I'm sure you all very talented,

but I hired Andrew to do my gardening.

- Yeah, we work for him.

So what you want from us to do?

- Oh, nothing, nothing.

I wouldn't dream of insulting your dignity

by telling you what to do.

No, that's why I specifically hired a white gardener.

- So you firing us?

Because we not white?

- No!

No, no, no, no.

Well, yes but...

Give me a second here I know somehow this makes sense.

- Look, we really need this job.

Andrew does not pay us if we don't work.

- Well it sounds like Andrew is exploiting you.

Look, I really need help with my garden,

and you really need work.

Why don't I hire you directly.

And pay you directly.

All of it.

No Andrew.

- Very good.

- I feel like I've really done something positive

for the men.

You should see the great job they did on the garden.

- That's great, Gerald.

Oh!

- You know what will make you feel better?

Cleaning out your system.

I'll get up some Flaxseed waffles, nature's brew.

- No!

Mail!

- Myanmar?

Letter from Mahkiekin!

- Oh, let me see it!

Oh!

Mahkiekin is escaping from the Myanmar

and she's going to visit us.

We're finally going to meet.

And we'll get to harbor a refugee.

Almost no one gets to do that.

- Oh, that's wonderful!

- I can't wait.

Let's see It took three months just for the letter

to get here.

She is about the size of ten letters, so...

(doorbell rings)

- Mahkiekin!

It's so wonderful to see you!

I'd give you a hug, if I wasn't in an excruciating pain

from a back injury.

No oh, oh.

Oh, that's much better.

- I fix.

- Oh, God!

That's amazing.

Your fingers are so gentle, yet powerful.

- Strong like bull.

- Oh, Mahkiekin, I just wish this was a better time

for a visit.

- I wait outside.

- Gerald?

And this, of course, is the restroom.

- Indoor shower?

Hot water?

- Yeah, that's a waste of energy though,

so we don't use it.

There's a rainwater shower outside.

- Microwave.

Only General have this.

I can't wait!

- It's not plugged in, we use it as a breadbox.

I'm sorry, this place is a bit of a mess.

- I scrub.

- You don't have to do that.

- I scrub!

- I'm gonna try to trade the water bottle

for three Bob Marley t-shirts.

- How is this gonna give us dad waffle mix?

- We flip it.

Trading up is the new economy.

Get on board, or get left in the dirt.

Hey, is that a glow in the dark yo-yo?

- You know, I thought it was a horrible time for Mahkiekin

to be here, but she is a God-send.

She has been so helpful around the house.

- I know, and she is so grateful to you.

You can see it in the way she carries you to the car.

- Hey!

You've got a hobo squatting in your shed outside.

Where's you fire extinguisher?

I'll roust her.

- In the shed?

- Sorry I sleep.

- No, it's okay.

We're not mad, but we made up Bliss's trundle for you.

- Like it here!

Very good, very much.

- We can't let her sleep in our potting shed.

- But we can't impose our western notion

of comfort on her.

Making her sleep inside, on a bed,

would be cultural imperialism.

- Eh, good point.

Hola, Muchachos!

What brings you here?

Your day is Miercoles.

- We need work.

Andrew always finds us work.

Maybe we need Andrew.

- No, no, no, you don't need Andrew.

I will save you from all that.

- Could you get 'em to knock down that bee hive too?

- Muchachos, the bee hive, rapido!

Fellas!

(upbeat music)

For gas.

- God, my back feels so much better.

Thanks to you.

(dramatic music)

- So much meat.

- We don't eat meat.

- Of course not.

- Omega 4?

I'll try it on Kent.

Margo, we're so excited about this gardening club tour.

Me and my guest, Mahkiekin.

Mahkiekin is a refugee from Myanmar.

Have you ever had a refugee guest, Margot?

- How did you get one?

I'm on a list!

No hydrogen car, now this!

- Is your friend unhappy?

- Yes, I really think she is.

Mahkiekin!

Oops, a little dirt.

You know, Mahkiekin, not to get all Uncle Sammy on you,

but you really should sweep up the potting shed,

if you're gonna sleep there.

- I can give you this sylph or the sprite.

I can't do both, they will kill me.

- Mm-mm.

- Okay, I'll do it!

- Oh, what a rush!

I heard a rumors about a trash can full of doorknobs,

wait right here.

- Oh.

I have sylph and sprite.

Trade for waffle mix?

I traded for waffle mix.

We did it!

- Are you out of the freaking mind?

I had us a driftwood clock.

That's less than four moves away

from a classic Euro scooter!

(chime music)

- No, we have the waffle mix.

We have to get home for the tour.

- But I'm on a roll.

And the booths are hot!

- Are you sure we're ready?

Tour-ready?

- Relax, we have everything all under control.

My boys are hard workers.

Wrap it up muchachos, it's almost Tour time!

Sure feels good to empower people.

- It's the greatest buzz ever.

- Party food ready.

I also bring you lemonade to refresh.

- Ehm lemonade is good, but what was that juice you made

the other day?

- Cucumber?

- Is there any more of that?

- I squeeze some.

- As long as it's no trouble.

- She does so much, do you think we should pay her?

- Gerald!

- You're right I keep trying to impose

my western values on her.

- Boy, you've got yourself quite a plantation here.

- He's so insensitive.

That's something you don't joke about.

- Ah, I know, the plantations where horrible.

When I think of the indignities those people suffered,

the slaves, not the owners.

No, the owners just set on their verandas,

drinking cucumber juice, while the slaves toiled

under the hot sun.

(dramatic music)

Did I just say cucumber juice?

- Oh, mister Gerald!

- I work all day and sleep in shed.

- Gerald, I'm a slave owner.

- I'm a conquistador!

- Next stop the Goodes.

Hippy neighborhood, so leave no valuables in the van.

(dramatic music)

- The Garden Tour.

We need to get rid of your crew and I need to...

Roll Mahkiekin up in a rug.

- Sorry I'm late.

- Ubuntu, take the gardeners around back

and over to Ray's, now.

- Oh, Gardeners!

- Helen, we can't roll Mahkiekin up in a rug,

that's compounding the problem.

- We need to hide her!

Oh, Bliss can take her out for a makeover.

Where is Bliss?

(upbeat music)

It's too late!

Quick, big smiles!

- Where is your Burmese refugee?

- I don't know.

It's not like I keep tabs on her.

She's probably enjoying her freedom somewhere.

I'll go look.

- So.

- Mahkiekin, are you there?

Crap!

- So, Helen really must be cracking the whip.

Literally?

- No time.

Must serve noodle wraps.

- Or else Helen will?

- Professor Montoya, I would love to know

what a connoisseur such as yourself

thinks of our garden.

- I must tell you, I am completely and utterly faithful

to my own garden, but those have got to be the sexiest

eggplants I have ever seen.

How did you ever achieve this?

- Well, hard work, our hard work.

- Mister Gerald!

I know you don't like us to use your water, but...

- No, no, I don't like you to waste water

when you come to the Tour, as my guest.

- Mister Gerald!

I can only carry five trays.

- Oh, look, it's our house guest

and family friend, Mahkiekin.

Here, let me take those.

- No, strong like bull!

- The oppressed servant was bad enough,

but a gardening group too?

- I thought it was your hard work.

- Wow it hurts to say this but exploiting immigrant labor

isn't what small scale organic farming is about.

Am I right?

- Mm.

- So, has everyone met the Burmese refugee I rescued?

- More like indentured.

- That's absurd!

I hurt my back, she's been helping out

with a little cooking, cleaning.

- Yes, sewing, ironing, massaging, painting nails.

- She did my toes once, I couldn't reach them.

- And I assume, you're getting paid at least...

- I no get paid, I sleep in shed.

(gasps)

- This is horrifying.

I have only one question.

Do we call Immigration, or is this more of a

Justice Department issue?

Helen, in America people get paid for their work.

- Unless they trade up.

- Trade up?

- Like paper clip for a house.

We tried to trade up...

- Which is what Mahkiekin was obviously doing.

- I've been meaning to do that myself.

- I hear it's the new economy.

- What could she possibly have been trading up for?

Her freedom?

- No, this classic motor-scooter.

That Mahkiekin knows will make her the envy

of all her friends.

She'll never have to ride the bus again

with the goth kids or the theater dorks.

- You were right.

Flax Waffle mix never would have fixed slavery problem.

- Yeah I feel great.

- I think it is lovable.

So, cutting edge, yet so sensitive of you

to use a barter system.

- Okay, fine, she's trading up.

But could someone explain to me why it is okay

to exploit this latino yard crew to do their dirty work?

- Uh.

- Latino?

My friend, I'm Afgani, and these two are Romanians.

- What?

What were you thinking, Margo?

How could you assume that these men were latino?

- That one's wearing a leaf blower.

- Oh, so I guess because I don't have a leaf blower,

I must not be latino.

Because I am a professor of Psychology,

I must be a tiresome, old Jew.

But this isn't about me, it's about you.

And your despicable racism.

- Oh.

- Mm-hmm.

- Now, now, Margo is not a bad person,

she just has bad thoughts.

Maybe she could use some sensitivity training.

- Maybe we all could.

- I was just confessing the same thing to my nanny.

- I guess we should be moving on now.

But we've learned so much from this house,

it should be a permanent fixture on the Garden Tour.

Welcome to the Club.

- Mister Gerald, you good man.

But we are a client-based now, so we don't need you anymore.

- Oh, thank God.

But why did you let me believe you were latino?

- Ah, people seem comfortable with it.

- Well, my back is all better,

so there will be no more working from you, Mahkiekin.

- Okay, just wrap up microwave.

And leave bread inside.

(upbeat music)

(upbeat theme music)

(singing in foreign language)

♪ The Goode family ♪