Original subtitles

* sleigh bells ring, Are you listening? *

* in the lane, Snow is glistening *

Laura, you're sure in The christmas spirit.

It's my favorite Time of year.

Mine, too. People seem Friendlier and happier.

Best of all, The urkel family

Leaves town For two weeks.

Ahh! Ahh!

* sleigh bells ring, Are you listening? *

* in the lane, Snow is glistening *

* a beautiful sight, We're happy tonight *

* walking in A winter... *

* wonder...Land *

* it's a rare condition *

* in this day and age *

* to read any good news On the newspaper page *

* and love and tradition Of the grand design *

* some people say Is even harder to find *

* well, then, there must be Some magic clue *

* inside these gentle walls *

* 'cause all I see Is a tower of dreams *

* real love burstin' Out of every seam *

* as days go by *

* we're gonna fill our house With happiness *

* the moon may cry *

* we're gonna smother the blues With tenderness *

* as days go by *

* there's room for you Room for me *

* for gentle hearts An opportunity *

* as days go by *

* it's the bigger love Of the family *

Steve, what are You doing here?

Spreading christmas cheer, My little candy cane.

You told me your family Was going to hawaii For two weeks.

My parents went alone To renew their vows.

Second honeymoon?

No, their renewing vows Not to have Any more children.

Lucky me, I get To spend christmas With uncle cecil.

Wasn't he busted for Operating an unlicensed Hot tub club?

He beat that rap

With polaroids Of the judge

Tickling the bailiff With a rubber duckie.

So you'll be around All christmas vacation?

Yep.

Wow...

By sheer Coincidence,

We just happen to Be standing under Some mistletoe.

Let us honor tradition With a kiss.

Hey!

Carl...

Richie wants A freddy teddy For christmas.

A what?

A battery-operated bear That moves his mouth,

Blinks his eyes, And tells stories.

Sounds like the guy I went out with last week.

Except his battery's Went dead.

Anyway, it's the only toy Little richie wants For christmas.

He has written to Santa claus six times

In case the first five letters Get lost in the mail.

So what is it? You need some money?

Is fuddy duddy Expensive?

Freddy teddy.

No, it's not that.

I've been to every Toy store in town, And they're all sold out.

The toy companies Deliberately Create a shortage,

Which increases demand, Which shoots up Their profits.

Rachel..

They don't give a hoot About the customer.

It's just Money, money, money.

It just Burns my boots.

Rachel.

I'm calling My congressman. No, the senator.

Forget that-- The president!

I'll call al mushman.

Oh...Who?

Al mushman, Our equipment Supply officer.

He can find anything.

If there's a funky frankie Within 500 square miles--

Freddy teddy.

Whatever.

Mushman will know Where it is.

Carl.

Is al mushman cute?

He's alright.

Is he single?

Yeah.

And he can find anything?

Right, mama.

Tell him he can find me Here tonight at 8 o'clock.

Oh, mom, look. I found the ornament Grandma baker gave me.

Oh, it's so pretty.

It's almost as old As I am.

Let's see, That means it's--

Yep...

Almost 21 years old.

Gosh, you guys are The perfect family.

Look how you've Decked these halls.

Thank you, steve.

You put the merry In christmas,

The no in noel,

The sp... In spirit.

Judy, come up To the attic.

We forgot The tree skirt.

Have I mentioned that I'd like a cd player?

Judy, Give it a rest.

Psst...

Whoa...Oh.

Guess what? I'm asking santa For a freddy teddy.

Really? Have you been Good this year?

I had a pretty good August.

That's a key month. You'll get freddy teddy.

Thanks, Uncle steve.

Uncle steve...

Ahh...

I just love children.

They're still young Enough to respect me.

Steve, you shouldn't Have told richie

Santa would bring him A freddy teddy.

Why in heaven's name not?

Aunt rachel's Having trouble Finding one.

Why is she even trying? That's santa's job.

Uh... You're kidding, right?

About what?

Steve, wait a minute. You still believe In santa claus?

Of course.

But steve, uh,

Hasn't anyone Ever told you That he's not real?

Well, I've heard rumors, But I try to ignore Vicious gossip.

You know...

There's even An ugly rumor Floating around

That I'm a nerd.

Steve, there is No santa c--

Shh.

He might hear you.

Steve, he's right.

You, too, laura?

You've swallowed This bilge water?

How is it possible for One guy to deliver toys

To every kid In the entire world In one night?

Well, it's a miracle, laura. You don't analyze miracles,

You just Believe in them.

Oh, please.

How can I show you That there really is A santa?

Oh!

Ah!

Well, I know!

I'll write down What I want For christmas.

Then I'll seal it

And mail it to you By registered mail.

We'll open it Christmas morning

And see if I got What I wanted.

Good idea. In fact...

Why don't you Run home now

And get started On that note?

I'm lickety-splitting.

Steve!

Did I do that?

Steve, you broke My favorite ornament.

Laura, I'll buy you Another one.

You can't. It's an antique.

It's as old As my mother.

Oh, well, Gee, I'm sorry.

You're always sorry.

I don't Want you over here Christmas morning.

I don't want you Here ever again.

Then that will be My christmas present To you.

Merry christmas, laura.

Hurry up.

How many of you are here For a freddy teddy?

I am.

Then the price Just went up to $90.

$90! Oh, my god.

Ma'am, I'm going to Have to call this in.

Aw. Aw.

How long have you Been waiting, sir?

Almost 3 1/2 hours,

And I drove 50 miles to get here.

Oh, my goodness.

What we go through For our children And grandchildren.

Tell me about it.

It's worth it, though,

To see Their little faces

Light up with joy On christmas morning.

Right.

After all, We love our kids,

And love is what Christmas is all about.

Yeah, yeah, Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Finally. One freddy teddy, please.

I'm sorry, folks,

But this is The last freddy teddy.

What?

Come on.

But that's not fair!

I'm sorry, But we're sold out.

This bohunk Butted in line.

I did not!

Oh, yes, he did!

Now that's my Freddy teddy!

Wait just a minute!

Didn't he butt in line?

Yep. So did you.

That's My freddy teddy!

This is not yours! Hey, wait a minute!

Don't do that!

Policeman in distress! I need backup! I need backup!

Help!

Oh, oh, oh, no.

Help! Oh.

Oh, oh, no!

Hi, mom.

Hello. Finish your shopping?

Yeah. The mall was mobbed.

The stores Only had stuff left That nobody wants.

Where's judy's Compact disc?

Willard scott sings His favorite camp songs?

Well, that's all They had.

Ooh, look. Bryant gumbel Sings backup.

Oh, what's The matter, honey?

Well...

I guess I'm feeling A little guilty.

About what?

The way I treated steve.

When he broke My ornament, I just...Freaked.

Oh, honey, It was an accident.

Steve can't seem To help being clumsy.

I know. When he was a baby,

I bet His first words were,

"Did I do that?"

So you want to Apologize?

No.

But I guess I should, huh?

Earlier, I heard him Singing in his basement.

Either that, or somebody's Torturing a cat.

* have myself A merry little christmas *

* make the yuletide Bright *

* from now on *

* my troubles will be Out of sight *

Well, my tree is up.

What do I do now?

I know.

I'll count My christmas cards again.

One.

Now I'll read it.

"Warmest holiday Greetings

From all your friends At the allergy institute."

[ding]

Oh, christmas dinner Is ready.

[knock on door]

Who is it?

Laura.

Oh, wow.

Uh, just a minute.

Hello, steve.

Oh, laura, My christmas cookie.

Why, you look prettier

Than a partridge In a pear tree.

What are you doing here?

Weren't you going to Your uncle cecil's?

Oh, well, He got arrested.

Oh. What happened?

He drank eggnog,

Put on his stocking cap, And went caroling.

Well, what's wrong With that?

All he had on Was his stocking cap.

So you're spending Christmas all alone?

Yep.

Yep, yep, yep, yep.

Are you Okay?

Why, sure.

I've got my christmas tree, My christmas card

And, hey, A christmas dinner.

Look, steve, I can't believe I'm saying this,

But would you Spend christmas eve At our house?

With you?

Yes.

And your family?

Yes.

Oh.

You mean actually Inside your house?

Yes.

Oh! Oh.

Maybe you can Stay overnight.

Oh! Oh!

Steve, sit down.

Oh! Oh!

Uh!

Laura? Yeah?

I've fallen, And I can't get up.

Oh!

Oh, boy.

Oh, boy.

Oh, oh, boy!

Wake up! Wake up! Santa came!

Everybody wake up! It's christmas!

* dashing through the snow In a one-horse open sleigh *

* o'er the fields we go, Laughing all the way *

* ha ha [snort] Da da da da da *

Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! It's christmas!

Did santa come? Did santa come?

He sure did. Look, look.

Wow, we really Cleaned up.

Yeah.

Carl, what in sam hill Took you so long?

What time is it?

5:30 a.M.

Good night.

Oh! Oh, yeah!

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Ha ha ha!

Coffee's on. Merry christmas, Everybody!

Merry christmas!

And, carl, Thank you For my trumpet.

Well, hey.

Yay! Whoo!

A cd player!

Look out! I'm musically Armed and dangerous.

Whoa! Check out My new boom box.

Hey, please Tell me we got them Headphones, too.

Thank god.

Hey, guys, look at me. I'm styling.

Whoo! Whoo!

Here, steve. Merry christmas.

Thank you, laura.

Oh, this is for you.

Wow! A wallet!

Ooh, and genuine canvas.

Oh, thank you, sweetums.

I'll put your picture And tape it to my heart.

That's not necessary, Steve.

Oh, yes, it is. That's where I always Keep my wallet.

You learn a few tricks

When you've been shaken Down for milk money.

What's this?

Oh, no.

Oh, yes.

Your very own Steve urkel doll.

I made it myself.

Now you'll always Have me with you.

Well, go ahead, Pull the string.

Did I do that?

Steve, You shouldn't have,

And, uh, I can't Emphasize that enough.

Ha ha ha [snort snort].

I've fallen, And I can't get up.

Richie, sweetheart.

What do you think of The bike santa brought you? Isn't it hot?

Yeah, it's great, But I really like Is my freddy teddy.

Uh, what freddy teddy?

This freddy teddy.

Carl?

I didn't get it.

Me, neither.

Steve, did you get it?

Not me.

Oh, come on, where did it Come from?

Santa brought it, Right, uncle steve?

Well, none of us did. It had to be santa.

But that's impossible.

My goodness, still The doubting eddo.

You want more proof?

Open that letter I sent By registered mail.

Let's see if steve Got what he wanted.

Here it is.

"Dearest laura And doubting eddo,

"To prove There is a santa,

"I'll ask him for an Impossible present--

"To spend christmas With my favorite people In the world--

The winslows."

Thanks, santa.

Oh, I love this song.

* have yourself A merry little christmas *

* let your hearts be light *

* from now on our troubles Will be out of sight *

* through the years, We all will be together *

* if the fates allow *

* hang a shining star Upon the highest bough *

* and have yourself *

* a merry little Christmas now *

* oh, yeah *

* bom bom bom *

* aah *

* bom bom bom *

* aah *

* aah *

* have yourself A merry little christmas *

* make the yuletide bright *

* have a merry little *

* christmas now *