Original subtitles

Now, I have to ask.

Why come to me with all this?

Well, Miss Armstrong...

Y-you have a reputation.

Fast,

effective,

and always gets the job done.

A-and that other thing you do.

That... other thing I do?

Ehh- you know...

that thing you do...

With men!

Using your... *cough* well...

[What could he be talking about? Equal-Opportunity?]

That doubles my fee.

Y-yes I know.

...or rather, I've heard.

And its worth every penny!

...so I've heard.

[Fuck! I didn't mean to slam that so loudly!]

I'll take the job.

...lets get down to business.

[To defeat... the Huns!]

Shall we?

*Tasteful clarinet begins playing*

Thats right *gasp*

Get yer nice hard cock right in between my tits!

Oh-h-h!

There you go!

You know just what to do.

*Mammary moaning intensifies*

*moan* Fuck

That feels so good!

*moan* Yeah!

Cum on me! Ohhh!

Let's see all that hot cum on my chest.

*the goo goes pew pew*

Yeah, baby. *the goo goes pew pew*

*the goo goes pew pew*

*Phew*

Leave the money with my secretary...

...on your way out.

Tina (narrating): I don't even know why I bother getting dressed.

[the IRS must love Tina's bookkeeping]

Every meeting starts and ends [the IRS must love Tina's bookkeeping]

Every meeting starts and ends

the exact same way.

Like a scratched record on a cheap player

perpetually stuck on repeat

A John walks through that door

bleeds his heart out over some

"sob story" to me.

I ask him why he came to me.

He hems and haws

as his true motivations come to light.

He fucks my tits

'til he blows his load on my chest.

and then I get paid twice

the going rate

for a mundane job.

...Plus a quick side of

mammary intercourse.

Miss Armstrong?

Your next client is here.

Understood!

Thank you.

Not to mention...

an ever-growing network

of potential clients

What can I do for you?

[Or should I say "What can Boob Cassidy and the Sundance Tit do for you?"]

*gasp*

...Ma'am?

[known colloquially as "Dolly Parton" and "Tricky Dick" respectively]