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He says, I need you to bring this bag with you.
The bag?
Where is my child?
It could have been anything.
A gun, a bomb, whatever it takes to get my baby back.
I had to go to Cuba.
I'm wondering if I can pull it off.
My heart was exploding.
My life is over.
The year was 1999, and I was 22.
The neighborhood I grew up in, I mean, we all went through hard times. Hard
times were normal.
I needed money for myself, my daughter.
I guess that I was willing to do what was necessary as long as it was legal.
My daughter's name is Leande, and she was five years old at the time.
She was staying wherever I was staying.
I was staying in people's couches.
I wanted it to just be her and I, really, honestly.
I wanted to work, and everything would be everyday normal, you know, a routine.
If we did dream, it was just a dream because everyone was
struggling.
It's hard to live a dream when you're living a nightmare.
My life was completely transformed overnight.
I was at a friend's barbecue when I met Roy.
He came in as if he was some kind of actor on stage, you know.
100 -watt smile and very showboat.
Roy was a music producer.
Slim, tall, dark and handsome.
Very, very, very handsome.
He takes one look at me and then he says, yeah, you're coming with me like
you'll do.
I thought, you're right.
Who are you?
My name is Roy.
He wanted to take me to Miami, see his house, see how he lives.
I thought he was crazy.
I thought he was crazy.
This is not what mothers do.
He said, listen, I don't understand the hesitation.
I'm going to take care of you and your child.
Better than you've ever been taken care of before.
I'm going to change your life.
All you have to do is be my lady.
Why wouldn't I go to Miami?
Miami was wild.
It was like a vacation every day.
Beaches and beautiful people everywhere.
I felt like this is the life.
Roy said, all you have to do is act.
I'm going to make it happen for you.
What I always wanted was my daughter's room to look like a princess room.
Just seeing her reaction and knowing that I was able to give her.
Whatever she wanted now was really comforting to me.
Roy was very hands -on with Allende.
He was very nurturing.
I liked the stability.
I was happy.
I don't know, maybe...
I'm pessimistic, but I don't think that happiness just falls in your lap like
that.
It was always in the back of my mind I would have to pay for it.
Roy started to become more controlling.
That girl is my daughter. You can't tell me that I can't leave. I'll do what I
want. There were times I felt kind of like a prisoner in my home.
I'd like to see you try and stop me.
I never thought about, what if this doesn't work? I didn't have plan B.
One day he comes in, and he says, we started out
really happy, and I want to get back to that.
The carnival is in Panama now.
Let's go down there.
Stay for a week.
And get reacquainted.
And start over.
Fresh.
I've never been outside of the state.
I was just excited about the whole thing.
Really excited.
His sister will watch the end day for the week.
When I was saying goodbye to her.
I tried to smile and I would beg, don't worry.
I think I was more worried than she was about me leaving her for a week.
I am jumping out of my seat with excitement.
Panama had a different sight and sound, you know, something I wasn't used to.
For my first trip out of the country, I think it was pretty cool.
I was just buzzing.
Rory and I held hands and we smiled and we laughed.
We were enjoying our vacation and sightseeing.
It's really nice.
I didn't know that it would drastically change.
I woke up the third day and
realized he wasn't there.
I went and had breakfast.
He's not there.
A couple hours later,
He comes in.
He tells me to come upstairs.
Come with me?
He seemed a little hurried.
Wasn't making eye contact with me.
At that stage, I just thought it would be an argument.
As much as I wanted to believe that we would have this whole week to
ourselves,
I always felt like something would come up.
When I walked into the room, I noticed that there was a bag there on the bed
that we didn't come with.
He's all of a sudden saying, listen, I have to leave. Something came up
suddenly. I have to go back to the States and take care of some business.
He says, I want you to stay here in Panama. I don't want to mess up your
vacation. I want you to enjoy the rest of the carnival.
When the carnival is over, we can finish our vacation in Paris.
Paris? He knew I always wanted to go to Paris.
You can't just leave me here.
He said, listen, when you come to meet me in Paris, I need you to bring this
with you.
I didn't.
Ask about the bag because when you're panicky or trying to get something done
and you're in the way of that, then he gets upset with you.
He left me $1 ,000.
He was out of the room within less than 10 minutes.
He said to me, I'll see you in Paris.
I was in shock that he left so quickly.
Did he really leave me?
Did he really just leave me here?
I'm in Panama all alone.
The bag was like not even registering yet because at that
moment I was thinking, did he take my return ticket home?
It wasn't there.
And then I look at the bag.
I pick it up.
I notice that it's heavy.
There's nothing in it.
So I'm wondering, you know, what is this weight to it?
It could have been anything.
Guns, a bomb, any type of drug. I don't know.
I had a suspicion it was something illegal.
When you come to meet me in Paris, I need you to bring this back with you.
I really didn't want to know.
The mind is a wonderful thing, and you can believe anything you want to.
And I made myself believe that Roy wouldn't put me in that predicament.
Ignorance is bliss.
About 7 or 8 in the morning, Roy called me.
He just said, hey.
And I'm like, hey?
What do you mean, hey?
How you doing?
How am I doing?
What do you mean, how am I doing? How you doing? Are you enjoying your
What are you talking about?
Do you realize that you left me here in Panama by myself?
Alone. Oh, you're fine.
Don't you still have money left, don't you? Yeah.
That's not the point.
Where's the bag? The bag?
Where's my child?
She's right here. She's fine.
Want to talk to her? He hands the phone to her. Hi,
Mom.
Daddy did this. Daddy did that. We went here. We went there.
It was just a normal day for her.
He gets back on the phone and he says, so what about the bag?
I said, You have to have it what's in it. He says, don't I take care of you?
Haven't I given you everything you wanted?
Yes.
Don't study the roots.
Just pick the fruit.
He said there will be someone calling very soon.
Just do what he says.
He hung up.
I've never been afraid of Allende being with Roy.
Now I am with me in another country.
He could take my daughter and uproot to somewhere else.
The truth is, I'm going to have to do what he says.
A couple of hours later, the phone rings.
This guy says, Hello, Kalila.
I'm voice for Jose.
I am on my way to come pick you up.
I was very nervous.
Very apprehensive.
I had a right to beep.
I didn't want to get in the car.
I... Really didn't have a choice.
Just didn't look like a guy that you would mess around with.
We go into a restaurant and we sit down.
He says to me, I want you to act normal.
Do you want anything?
And no.
I'm going to order you a coffee.
And I am sweating bullets trying to act normal.
Jose said that I had to go to San Jose, Costa Rica before I
could get to Paris.
I was shocked.
I was expecting to go straight to Paris and end this whole nightmare.
He gives me my ticket.
I had no idea I would be getting on the bus.
I asked him, what's going on? What is this about?
He grabbed my hand and he says to me, he heard that I had a daughter.
And he says, didn't Roy tell you not to ask us anything?
Knowing I will do whatever it takes to get my baby back.
He dropped me off at the hotel, and he says, I'll have a cab come and pick you
up in the morning.
Enjoy your trip.
I go inside, and I'm just brain -trained.
I took a shower and just went to bed.
The telephone wakes me up, pounding head.
I'm so, so tired.
Kalila, your taxi to the bus station will pick you up in a half an hour.
This is actually happening now.
I keep telling myself it'll be over before you know it.
I'm leaving the room.
And I'm picking up the bag, and I'm realizing this is pretty heavy.
I'm wondering if I can pull it off, carrying this around with me and making
it look comfortable.
The bag was heavy, but my heart was heavy, too.
I felt like I had lead in my feet.
The cab driver pulls up.
He also knows me.
Everyone knows me.
I was very paranoid.
I get in the back of the car, put my sunglasses on,
and I told myself, okay, stay strong.
Get through it. Get home.
We get to the bus station, and the
driver takes the bag out of the car, and he says to me, your bus will be coming
shortly. Look out for it.
Goodbye.
Say anything you said.
I walk into the bus station.
I waited for the bus. Maybe half an hour, 45 minutes.
I'm there. I thought by myself, but I realized that he was still outside, kind
of lingering.
I get to make sure I got on the bus.
When the bus pulls up,
I just couldn't believe it.
I hadn't seen a bus that old with no air conditioning.
There are chickens on this bus.
I never saw chickens outside of the zoo.
We drove for I don't know how long.
It's a very hot day.
I was hungry.
I needed a bathroom.
I had a headache.
It was her.
I didn't know when the bus would stop.
We arrived at a border crossing.
They said that I had to get off the bus.
They said, you go.
I was definitely scared.
We had to get our passports flipped over.
My heart was pounding because they asked me
where I was going.
I said to Costa Rica, but they didn't understand why I'm going on the bus.
I didn't have an answer for them.
It kind of gave me a hard time because they want to know why I only had
at that time maybe $100 on me.
And if I'm a tourist, why so little money?
I was really pushing my luck.
And I knew it.
I didn't get nervous until I saw the dogs.
They're these guards with these huge dogs and
huge rifles.
My heart started racing because I wasn't expecting that they were searching for
drugs.
Okay, I'm in trouble.
They smelt our luggage. They smelt us.
They told us to take off our shoes.
And then the dogs went down the line, one by one.
The whole time, I was hardly breathing, very shallow breathing.
I was expecting to be caught.
One dog after another went past me.
But there was this one dog that stayed a little longer than the rest of them.
And they had him check me again.
My heart racing.
The heart almost exploded.
He looked at me.
I looked at him like... The
dog didn't pick up on his scent.
They pulled him away.
I finally breathed, and I felt really lightheaded.
I got back on the bus and we started driving.
I felt more confident about getting to Paris and getting this done.
I said, okay, it's almost over. Come on, what's next, you know?
Call Jose.
Told him that I made it to Costa Rica.
He says, great.
You'll be leaving from Costa Rica now to Paris. You have to buy the ticket. I'll
send you some money.
You're almost there.
Hi, good evening.
I've asked them for a ticket to Paris.
They said they didn't have a direct flight to Paris, that I had to go to
and purchase a ticket to Paris there.
Come on, not something else.
I said, well, give me a ticket to Cuba. And they said they don't have a flight
out that day, that I had to leave the next morning.
I just wanted to get over with.
I wanted to get it over with.
I was devastated.
You will be leaving tomorrow in the morning at 7 o 'clock.
And they said, well, do you need your luggage?
I was just fed up with the bag, the weight of it.
responsibility of it.
So I said no.
I took some clothes out from it for the next day, and I left that bag in
the airport.
And I thought nothing of it.
I forgot about the bag.
Forgot about Roy, and for one moment, again, I felt like I was on vacation.
I went to the hotel.
I went swimming.
I go and get a drink.
Finally fall asleep.
The next morning.
I'm feeling really sick.
All of a sudden, I realize the bag is in customs.
There is no way they wouldn't have opened it and found out what was in it.
At the border crossing, the dogs didn't detect anything.
I was sure they must have found something illegal through the x -ray.
I didn't want to go back to the airport because right away, as soon as I came
in, that would be the end.
But I go to the airport, really didn't have a choice.
I just want to get this over with so I can give home to my daughter.
I had sunglasses on because I was afraid that it would be obvious
that I was really nervous and anxious.
I don't even think I felt my legs moving.
I was just kind of like on autopilot and really zoned out.
I take one step and my legs are so shaky that in my heels I'm wobbling.
I'm biting my nails.
I'm sweating like crazy. I'm looking over my shoulder. I'm thinking that
somebody's going to pop out and it's going to be like a whole army of custom
agents and police.
I get to the gate where my plane is leaving.
As I'm handing them my ticket, I just knew I was going to be caught.
They definitely remember me from the night before.
They're checking in my ticket, and it just seemed like forever.
I think if anyone just tapped me on my shoulder, I would have hit the roof.
They said, your bag is already on its way into the airplane.
I just thought to myself, it's going too smoothly, too smoothly.
And they just say, okay, you enjoy your chair.
I couldn't believe it.
I breathed a sigh of relief.
There was no way to detect it.
What is it?
I had no idea.
Before I got on the plane, I decided to sit down and have lunch, and I noticed
a girl outside the restaurant.
I thought, she looks like a nice person.
And I really wanted somebody to...
to talk to and just, like, feel normal for a minute.
Her name was Laura.
I'm Laura.
She was from England.
She was a tourist, taking pictures and kind of hanging out.
I told her the same thing.
I thought it was odd that she was so young traveling by herself, but she
more comfortable than I did.
In my own way, I was...
Using her to feel normal.
We're sitting there talking like newfound friends.
I said, I am going to Paris. And Lori says, I'm going to Paris too.
I just felt like that was like fate.
We get on a plane.
Okay, what's next now?
Cuba. Cuba.
Cuba.
I just realized I'm going to Cuba.
So we arrive in Cuba, and once again, I have to collect
this bag.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
I'm so tired of dealing with it.
I know as an American I shouldn't be in Cuba.
I handed customs my passport. They were very suspicious.
They immediately started asking me questions.
Where are you coming from? The United States. Where are you going? Paris.
They told me if I didn't leave the next day, they would come looking
for me.
I was shocked, and I was really scared.
As we were leaving, I said to Laura, let's just get a hotel together and save
some money.
Honestly, I wasn't ready to let her go.
We went into the room.
She's curious about the space, and I asked her about London.
And I'm just sitting there on the bed, and I noticed that Laura's bag looked
exactly like mine.
Exactly the same as mine.
Same color, same shape, same bag.
I'm staring at the bag, and I'm looking at her, and I'm trying to picture her as
a drug trafficker.
I said, no, no.
Impossible, no.
Because if she is, she's really good.
And then I thought, if I did ask her, and if it wasn't true, And I
would lose this new friend that I found.
I just gave her the benefit of the doubt.
That night, I couldn't sleep.
A young day was in my thoughts.
Here I am, almost home to my daughter.
I just wanted, just wanted my baby.
We get up early the next morning.
Within half an hour, the phone rang.
Hello?
Hello?
I hear this guy hollering in the background.
Okay. She hangs up the phone, and she looks at me really seriously, and she
says, I haven't been completely honest with you.
I have drugs in my bag.
And I say, well, I don't know what I have in my bag.
I'm assuming it's drugs.
I see her demeanor changing.
And she says, I don't think it's a good idea that we get on the same plane.
It would be suspicious.
To get on that flight. She tried to bribe me.
To have some money. To take another flight.
And I told her, no, I'm getting on that plane.
She said, okay, I gotta go.
Good luck.
I get a taxi to the airport.
I felt alone again.
Laura was the first person that made me face the fact that you've got drugs
and you better wake up.
Now there's more of a possibility that something could really go wrong.
It's two young girls with illegal substances getting on the same plane.
I can't imagine what may happen if I get caught here.
When I arrived again at the airport, I left the bag at
check -in.
I get to the gate.
Where my plane is leaving, I see Laura is already in line.
She saw me and she never looked at me again.
Someone that works at the airport came out from behind the gate
to speak to Laura.
She hugged him.
I didn't know she knew anyone in Tua.
Looking back on it, it must have been her connection.
Hello.
Okay.
I saw Laura board the plane.
She never looked back.
I didn't know that she had help.
And I got worried.
I didn't have help.
There's still a couple of people in front of me, and a guy in a black suit
down the line and says, would you step out of line, please?
I felt like they were trying to scare me, and I wouldn't be
scared.
Even though my heart was racing.
I'm ready to get on this plane.
I hate leaving now.
They asked me to step into what's said a viewing room over top of the door.
I saw that they had my bag there.
Take a seat.
Take a seat. Do you mind opening it?
They look through the things.
I'm in such denial about everything that's going on.
It doesn't even feel real.
And I said, is my plane going to wait for me?
They said, yeah, it's not a problem. The plane will wait for you.
They pick up the bag.
It weighed about 15 pounds.
Completely empty.
They were confused and curious.
Don't look at me, you know, your guess is as good as mine.
They take out a pocket knife.
They cut the inseam of the pocket.
I went through checks, customs, dog
sniffers.
If I get caught at this moment, Laura must have told on me.
They pulled out these thin plastic bags.
They cut open the bags and pulled
out some of this powdery and sticky substance.
Okay, what now?
I don't know.
And he says, now, the chemical test, if it turns blue,
it's cocaine.
And you're in big trouble.
You should get up.
The whole room's spinning.
I'm telling myself that this is a dream.
I'm telling myself, it'll be okay.
I'm going to laugh this off.
I was going home to my daughter, and I'm going to see my family.
It was cocaine all along.
He says, you're facing 15 to 30 years.
We drive.
to the police station.
They take me up into holding cells and the smell just came
out at you. It smelled so bad.
I looked at the guard like, you want me to go in there?
I didn't think I was going to cope.
I was so in shock.
I couldn't cry. I couldn't get excited or angry. I was just worried
and scared.
My life is over.
It's over.
After eight days, they moved me to a big prison.
I thought that if I told them the truth, that they would find Roy and they're
going to find my baby.
And this will be all over.
But everyone I come across is like, your life
is over.
Forget about it.
This is where you're staying.
This is where you'll be.
Face it.
I got a visit from the intersection. My name is Jose Miguel. You have a
daughter, right?
Right. They said that Roy was on the run and nobody knew where he was.
But they said my daughter was at my mother's house.
I was very relieved to find out that Allende was safe.
I was angry with Roy because I really believed that
he would grow a conscience and tell him the truth so I can get
home to my daughter.
The prison itself was horrific.
I didn't know how I would survive.
It took me a while to get used to the fact that I wasn't in my country,
that these people despised me because I was American.
They didn't want to talk to me. I didn't want to talk to them.
I was the only American woman imprisoned in Cuba.
I received my sentencing by letter.
It was the maximum that they were asking, 15 years.
I was so devastated that I wouldn't see Allende.
I knew that my family wouldn't come to Cuba to visit me.
I felt really guilty because I also had to take blame and responsibility for
myself.
Even if I didn't purchase the drugs, I still participated because I
didn't find a way out of it as soon as possible.
I cope by holding on to my happier moments at home and remembering my
smile and reading as much as possible, learning
the language so that I could defend myself.
Prison made me grateful for the small thing that people take for granted every
day.
family and the importance of having just your necessities
and not necessarily your wants.
The biggest lesson that I learned is freedom is priceless.
Here it is, the American that's leaving.
I think that I gave a lot of people hope.
They expected me to be doing my time completely, and I did too.
And it just felt really good to actually walk out and see the other
side of the gate without.
I was completely riddled with anxiety because after six years,
I didn't feel like I was ready to face the state.
When I arrived back home, I was elated. Everyone was
there.
My daughter, I hadn't seen in six years.
And when I left her, she still had baby teeth.
And now I'm seeing her again for the first time, and she's just as tall as I
I didn't know what to expect from our relationship. I thought that she would
really be angry with me.
She was just happy to get Mommy back.
And I was grateful that she wasn't as angry
with me as I was with myself.
I never got over the guilt. I still live with it.
I never put myself...
My daughter or anyone else for that matter in that situation again ever
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