Original subtitles

Gus Ball!

Ugly!

You gonna set Ron up with Maxie? New York, watch out! All right.

Darling, do you mind sitting this one out?

How's the, uh, competition going?

May the best choreographer win.

You can't imagine What's the

matter? You and your old man getting into it again? He's made his choice.

How would you feel if I stopped being your friend?

Well, Fame Park.

And right here is where you start fame.

Fame, I'm gonna live forever.

Baby, remember my name.

There you go, Ron. We're with Fry. All right.

If things turn out, we'll sew your name over the pocket. Hey, thanks a lot, Mr.

Mackey. I appreciate it. And just remember to lose Lane's motto.

The customer is nearly always right.

Yeah. Hey, Danny, you know you got the job? No, I didn't even tell him I

applied. You're going to surprise your buddy? Yeah.

Well, you better get into uniform, because here he comes now.

Where do I go? Right there. I got a lot of homework tonight, so let's not stay

late. All right, we'll leave fast, okay?

Hold at hand. Now, isn't that sweet?

I had to help him across the street. Yeah, right.

Donald, don't you better go sing or do something.

Pretty soon.

You're not going on just like that, are you?

Yeah, why not?

You look kind of swishy, all right?

Danny.

You do?

Hey, you don't want people getting the wrong idea about you, darling, right? I

think he looks great.

Some guys don't know good taste when they see it.

Hey!

Gunfall!

Ugly!

What are you doing, babe?

How you doing, man?

What'd you do, steal a shake? Hey, Jillian, steal nothing.

You're looking at a full -fledged footwear distribution engineer.

I'm working the shoe rental counter. All right!

Hey, that's great. Congratulations.

Thanks a lot.

So you're going to be handing out bowling shoes, huh? Yep.

Thanks to Luke. Hey, Luke, did you see this guy left from right?

Ronnie, I always knew you were going to make something of yourself. I'll pay you

what? As soon as I get my first paycheck?

What? You can buy me lunch. You got it. All right. Hey, Ronnie, you're on my

time now. Come on. You got it, boss. You got to go. Got to be some fit. I'll

catch you later. You got it. See you later, Ronnie.

You picked a real winner there, babe.

You guys from the Bronx, you always stick up for each other. Hey, I know the

like... Hey, Danny.

What's new, man?

Nothing. Same old.

Yeah? How's your mom? She's doing good. She's back in Florida.

What, visiting Aunt Rosa? Yeah.

All right. So I got the whole place to myself for a month.

Whoa. Yo.

Yeah.

Why don't you come stay with me?

I don't know, man. Come on. What do you mean you don't know?

Your mom. Would she mind?

Of course not. Come on, man. It'll be a blast.

All right. Talk me into it. Talk you into it, huh? New York, watch out. All

right.

Catchy tune.

That's Dippy Day.

Dippy Day?

Yeah, you know, that man in the orange suit on TV that sells all those stereos.

Oh, him, him. Well, he's looking for a dance routine to help him sell his new

commercial. Excuse me, that's big bucks.

Honey, that's low, low budget.

But I thought it'd be nice to have some of my work on film, you know?

Yeah, well, that would be nice. You got any ideas?

I don't know. I want to keep it simple. I think I'll use four dancers and try to

use some levels. You know, start somebody over here. Have somebody

there. Then somebody should enter and be like on a little platform like this.

And then a spot to swirl over here. And then get into the dance.

Do something really kind of stylish, you know. That's good.

Maybe a little hat or something.

What do you think? You want to work with me on this?

I'd love to. In fact, I thought I'd think about some ideas myself right

Great, but don't spend too much time. It's only a 60 -second spot.

Turn that music on. Come on, let's do it.

This is great. I remember this day like it was yesterday. I swear. Remember this

trip, Daddy?

Remember this? This is where we were the Poconos at the tender age of eight,

huh? We were so cute. Yeah, what happened?

Cute turned their heads. Yeah, sure.

Oh, wait, wait, listen. This is the shot we all get to go on. Everybody on the

count of three. One, two, three.

Oh, that's the end of the trip. Hey, Bobby, hit the lights, will you, buddy?

All right, thanks a lot. All right, after a short break, we'll be back with

two of the Ron and Danny show, Cowboys and Indians. Get out of here. You didn't

bring that one, did you?

What, your first shot at acting? Of course I brought it. Eight years old,

already a prosciutto.

Prosciutto, what's that?

An Italian ham.

Yeah, that's you, Danny. That's got to be a comedy thing. No, no, Danny was a

talent in the neighborhood.

I had a different dream.

Win the lotto or retire.

Don't be so modest, Twinsio. Ron is a genius with wood.

Excuse me one second.

Look at this. He made this for my mother. You made that? Yeah, yeah. It

and everything. I rock you.

And we also got bigger plates, too. Where is it? I put it under the TV.

Look at this. Ron designed it, and we're both going to build it. You bet.

Isn't that great?

You see the TV will go here. We'll get it off of that stand over there. And the

stereo goes here. And across the top shelf here, right across the top there.

That's where old Danny's Oscars will go. But what do we say? We're going to make

the shelf bigger, right? Oh, yeah. Another eight inches on each side.

Absolutely. I get that. Okay.

Hey, Mr. Stefano.

How you doing?

Fine, Denny. How are you? Come on in. Great.

Let me introduce you to everybody. Everybody, this is Mr.

Stefano Rondet.

Hi. Hello.

Ron brought over your old home movies on it. Yeah, we were just watching you

teach Ron how to pitch.

Yeah, and Emmett Toole threw a fastball through the neighbor's window. Remember

that?

I remember Miss Fazio almost had a heart attack.

Danny, you always could hit an inside pitch.

He had a great coach, right?

Ron, you got a second?

Sure. Excuse me, sir.

What's going here? Your bed.

This is the kitchen.

Stay the night if you want. Why do you want me home?

Keep an eye on me?

Are you afraid I'll embarrass the family name?

I want what's best for you. You don't know what's best for me.

And you do.

You don't listen.

It's just a kid.

Dad.

I think you ought to leave.

You will?

Mr.

Stefano, you leaving?

Hey, everything okay?

Yeah.

Sometimes my own man gets on my nerves, huh?

Come on. Yeah, yeah. Come on, let's party, huh?

This is the Cowboys and Indians thing.

Those are some good times.

Ugh, man.

I don't know.

Yo, two points.

Come on, another.

Man, what did we clean it up for anyway, huh?

It's just throwing a little lip in. I like it this way.

The place looks like the city dump with carpeting, Ron.

Besides, that is the sign of a good party, right?

Huh?

What's the matter? You and your old man getting into it again? Oh, man.

He's been in real pain lately.

You know your old man's a great guy, right?

Yeah, well, he's not too thrilled with me right now.

How come?

You don't think I want to hear this?

I'm your buddy, right?

Huh?

Yeah, you are.

It's just that, um... I want to keep it that way.

You know?

What could be so terrible? What did you do, kill somebody?

No.

Then come on.

Hey, there is nothing that you can't tell me.

This has to stay between us.

Call it. No, I'm serious.

Really.

What is it? You can trust me.

Oh, boy.

Come on, spit it out.

You're kidding me.

You can't be.

Why not?

Because you can't be.

Look, I know this is kind of a shock for you.

Yeah, it is.

You want me to go?

Then you're still my friend, right?

Right?

Of course.

All right.

I'm sorry.

It's going to take a little time getting used to, you know?

Hey, what's up? How much?

Fix me breakfast?

Did you break your arm or something?

Nah, too much work for the salad at that.

So, uh, I guess everything's cool, huh?

Yeah, sure. Why?

I was just wondering if you might have second thoughts or something.

You know. No way. Come on.

Hey, you're going to pick up... I'm going to pick up the rest of the lumber.

Yeah, tonight.

It's all worth tonight, right?

Right.

Good,

good. Okay, here. I think I want you to come through here. Give me double chiné

turn, attitude, kick, break, break, break, break. Hey, five, six, seven, and

double turn, kick, and break, break. Yeah, break.

Okay, fellas, fellas. The fellas should do something like this.

Ha!

I had something else in mind. A little more.

Well, I had something else in mind also, and it was more like this, you know.

Fan kick. Something with a little more style.

Keep all that style.

You don't like it? Don't use it. Don't work for me, Leroy.

Okay, people, I think on the break, let's go.

Kick step, Sinead.

Grandma, Mom, break here.

Fight through.

Am I keeping you awake, Leroy?

Oh, I'm sorry, Miss Grant. It's just that I thought we was going to go for

something a little less old hat. Old hat?

Leroy, um, I don't think we're quite on the same track here.

I don't either. In fact, I think I should bow. I have too many ideas of my

No, that's good. You have ideas. Good, good.

In fact, you do your version. I'll do mine. We'll both take a shot.

You sure you want mine?

Sure. We'll show Dippy Day two routines and let him decide.

Fair enough.

Deal? Deal.

Choreographer wins. I'm sure he will.

You two, follow me.

You two, follow him.

Five, six, seven, ten.

One for the working man.

Hey, thanks, Laura.

Hey, how about those guys?

The ball guy?

Yeah. Um, size ten.

Ten and a half.

You sure? Yeah, absolutely.

And you haven't even been here a week.

If you ask me, it's a gift.

It's nothing.

Hey, Pinhead.

We still get out of here at seven, right?

Yeah. Well, I got a couple of people together. We're going to go to the

You want to join us?

Yeah, okay.

I'm in. Look, I got to go. Break's over.

Shoes are calling, you know?

Yeah, I'll see you at seven, all right?

What did I hear about a flick?

What? Because it turns out I'm up tonight.

That Lou's got the muskrats coming in.

Alan, do you mind setting this one out?

Why? I kind of set up a double date. You know, Ron doesn't know about it yet.

You're going to surprise him.

Yeah, I'm bringing Maxie.

Wait a minute. You're going to set Ron up with Maxie?

Wait until you are a good buddy. What do you think? Is it a good idea?

Come on. They were hitting it off great at your party.

Still, I don't know.

Trust me.

Ron will love him for it.

Yeah? Yeah.

Hi, Ron.

Oh, hey, Maxie.

Hey.

Triggered more than marry you, you know.

Let's get going, huh? What, do I get too long at the snack bar? Come on.

There you go.

Thank you. Sure.

Stop. Me too. It was good.

Don't waste your money. I just saw it. What a movie. I never heard someone

talking. I know. You like more action. Yeah. Me too.

You know, Maxie loves Kung Fu Flicks. You know, they're Ron's favorite, too.

You're kidding. You know what? There's a Bruce Lee festival coming up.

Really?

Yo, Cap.

I'm really beat.

Good night, lady. Thanks for the laugh. Thank you.

Good. Good night, Danny. Bye -bye.

We'll do it again real soon, okay?

Hey, drive carefully.

Hey.

Cheap shot, Amatulo.

What? Setting me up like that. What are you trying to do, cure me?

Has it ever occurred to you that maybe you haven't met the right girl yet? See,

now you're beginning to sound like my old man.

Hey, Ron, your father may be right. Do you know that?

Look, I've been down this road before, Amatullo.

You're wasting your time.

You know, I just thought maybe. Maybe you'd like Maxie. That's all. I do like

Maxie, but I do not want to date her.

That's fine.

It's just that my whole family's been trying to set me up with every girl in

Bronx, and I'm just getting kind of tired of it.

Hey, I understand, all right? I'm sorry.

It won't happen again, okay?

Yeah, okay.

All right, kids, I think we got it.

Now let me see it again from the top.

Thank you.

That was very good.

Unfortunately, it's not good enough.

See, Roy, we nailed that.

Look,

it's not your fault. It's mine.

It's just that this number has to be better.

Come on, it's a great number.

You guys fail to realize we're up against Lydia Grant.

Being good is not going to cut it.

Hey, Danny, I saw Maxine in math class today. She said she had a really good

time last night.

Yeah? Yeah, she keeps asking when we're going to do it again.

Why not?

Why not? She really likes Ron.

Look, I don't want to talk about Ron no more.

Okay, I don't understand.

They got along so great.

Doesn't Ron like Maxie? No.

I can't believe that. Hey, look, forget about Ron and Maxie, okay? Ron doesn't

like girls, period.

What? He's gay.

Okay, stop bugging me.

Danny, I'm sorry. I didn't know.

Well, now you know.

He's a weirdo.

All right? My friend's a weirdo.

Hey, Ronnie, how's the... Hey, that looks good.

Eh? Yeah, it looks real good.

What'd you do, forget how to swing a hammer?

Nah, I forgot you can't put your fist through a two -by -six.

What happened?

I talked to my old man today.

You can't go two minutes before we start yelling. Hey, he's Italian.

You know, this is what you're saying, he loves you. Yeah, I love him too, but we

can't get along.

I got the whole list today.

I'm an embarrassment to the survival men.

When my grandmother finds out, she's going to have a heart attack.

My mother's crying herself to sleep.

I'm telling you, my dad keeps saying I let the family down.

Why haven't they let me down?

I mean, I knew he wasn't going to dance in the street, but...

Now he's saying he's going to disown me. Hey, I know your family. They wouldn't

do that.

Don't bet on it.

It'll make him sick.

I can see it in his eyes.

I'm really worried, Danny.

I don't want to lose my whole family.

Right now, you're the only one I got.

Come on.

I'm serious.

You're it.

Miss Grant, you got a call from Dippy Day.

Oh. You know I met him once before he got famous?

You did?

I was one of his first customers. He sold me a radio back in 1949.

Does it still work?

No. It was a piece of junk.

Got a thing that fell apart after 30 years.

You know he wouldn't take it back?

What a bandit.

I can't wait to see your routine for the commercial.

Leroy, too.

How's the competition going?

I hardly call it a competition, Ms. Burr. We're not taking it seriously as

that.

Hey, Ro, I hope none of you made any plans for tonight because we're going to

working very hard and very late.

Very, very late.

I'm sorry I'm late, Amatul.

Hey, your buddy Ron going to join us?

He's working the late shift today.

Pepperoni's a game?

You know, if you showed up on time, you'd get a vote, all right? You see, it

don't matter, because I'm so hungry.

Okay, good plan.

Louie wants to speak to you upstairs.

Yeah, okay, thanks. All right, I'll catch you later, all right?

I want you to leave now, all right?

Huh? You hear what I'm saying? Just go.

What's the problem?

There's no problem. Just get out.

I don't know what you're talking about, buddy. Come on, just beat it, all right?

Hey, get your hands off me. Hey, what are you doing, man? Hey, hey, hey, hold

on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Come on, what's going on? This guy's trying to

throw me out for no reason. Hey, you know exactly why I'm trying to throw you

out. Throw it at him. Come on. You better call the wagon for this lunatic.

Donald, stay out of this, all right?

Well, so what, man? Since when do you decide who comes in or lose? Why are you

taking his side? Because you're out of...

For a commercial?

I suppose the exposure would be worth it. And then we're going to really go to

work next time, okay?

Paul.

Paul, just when you didn't see. Honey, do you think you could do me a really

favor today?

Probably. I have cafeteria duty today, but I really needed another couple of

hours to work on this routine.

Could you cover for me just for today?

I'd be delighted.

You hate cafeteria duty.

How can I turn down a colleague in need?

Oh, that is so sweet of you.

And in exchange, you can take my place at the next two curriculum meetings.

Two? That's extortion?

You got a deal.

Miss Grant, don't you think you're carrying this competition idea a bit too

Oh, Mr. Davenport, this isn't a competition.

Leroy and I are just pursuing two different ideas.

It doesn't matter who wins.

As long as it's me

Before this night is over, I'm gonna take you to the wall.

Cause I know I won't get nowhere if I keep on thinking small.

What is it that they always wanted?

That they thought they'd never get?

What kind of show will get them so excited?

What can I do they won't forget?

Ooh, think, think, you can imagine.

Imagine.

I could dream a little more.

I could make it something special like they've never seen before.

Don't be afraid to stretch the situation.

I know something she can't know.

I'll be as good as my imagination.

Just open up.

And let it show Big, big, can you imagine All

of the potential in the palm of my hand Big, big, who'll think

about it Anything can happen, I think that they can

Hey, I'm a too low.

Time to help me out, huh?

I can't. I told Donald I'd meet him down at Lou's a little later on.

I thought we were going to work on it together, bro.

I can't tonight.

You can't or you don't want to. Because if you don't want to, just say so.

You don't start hassling me. I'm just trying to get a straight answer. Why are

we arguing?

I don't know. Why don't you tell me? You're the one who started this. I don't

care who started it. We never used to fight like this before.

Well, you were never so hard to get along with before.

You mean before I told you I was gay.

Hey, listen.

You know, everything was going along great until then.

Oh, so you're blaming me. I just don't understand why you decided to be gay. I

didn't decide it. It just happened. No, no, no. You're letting it happen, Ron.

You know, you can fight it. Danny, it doesn't work that way. How do you know?

Of course I know. You think I had a choice? That doesn't mean you have to

it. Yes, it does.

You're the one who can't accept it. That's no answer, all right? It's no

Danny, will you listen? Get your hands off me, you faggot.

I haven't used my last name since Korea.

Call me Dippy.

Okay, Dippy.

Dippy, this is Leroy Johnson.

Hello, Leroy. Hello, Mr. Dippy. My associate choreographer.

And these are the kids. Say hi to Dippy.

Hi, Dippy.

Hi, Dippy.

Okay, well, come on, Dippy. Let me show you my version. All right.

Hot dog.

Okay, kids, hit it.

Dippy Dave.

Dippy Dave.

Dippy Dave.

Dippy Dave.

It's an electronic paradise where we can do things.

We'll find ourselves a price that's nice when we buy from TPJ.

Now I'm going to show you my version, okay, Mr. Dippy?

Guys, let's go DVD with real dancing. It's all about it. All right?

Terrific, kids. Great huffing. Wonderful.

Just wonderful.

So, uh, which one do you pick?

Yeah, the first one or the second one? They were both really impressive.

Yeah, but which one do you like better?

You have to pick one.

Actually, I can't use either of them.

What?

They were both too fancy. I'm a simple man with a simple image.

And your stuff, uh, it's just...

Doesn't have that old Dippy Dave flavor.

Wrong flavor.

Wrong flavor.

Right, and the music. Everybody knows my jingle.

And if I would change my jingle, it would be like paying the Statue of

red. Wrong color.

Wrong color.

Yeah, right.

But look, I know you all worked hard. You just weren't thinking Dippy Dave.

hey, you come on down to my store any time, pick up a Dippy Dave T -shirt.

Free of charge.

And that goes for you too, kid.

I cannot believe this guy.

Can you believe this guy?

I can't believe he didn't like my routine.

Or mine.

But the guy has no tape. That's all to it. I mean, you really like that stupid

Dippy Dave song. Dippy Dave.

Dippy Dave. You know what? That's what we should have done.

We should have done something just as stupid as the jingle he had.

Dippy day.

Dippy day.

Dippy day.

Dippy day.

Dippy day.

Dippy day.

Dippy day.

That's what I wanted exactly. I love it. When can we shoot it?

Hey, little buddy, what's up?

You know Ron quit?

No. Yeah, yeah, he called. Said he's staying with his aunt or something.

real sick.

Yes, I think.

What's going on?

All right.

That's none of my business. Hey, hey.

Me and Ron kind of had a fight, you know?

He's gay.

Oh, yeah. Hey, he is. He told me.

You know, I mean, I grew up with the guy.

I went camping with him. We even played baseball together, Donovan. He was like

a brother to me.

And I thought I knew the guy.

money or something? Of course not.

What'd you fight about?

You don't get it.

No, I don't, man. He's your buddy.

That's just it.

He was my buddy. And now he's not.

You know, I thought you were bigger than that. Well, let me ask you a question.

What would you do if I told you I was gay?

I don't know.

But suppose you did.

How would you feel if I stopped being your friend?

Yes, Mr.

Alfofano, please.

When will he be back?

Yes, I would.

Could you tell him to stop by Danny Amatullo's house on his way home?

I have some of his son's stuff they need to pick up.

Yeah. Thank you.

Bye.

Hi, Danny.

Got your message.

Nice job.

It's really coming along.

Where's Ron?

He left last night.

Oh.

I thought he was coming home with me.

No.

He's gonna stay with his aunt.

He's not coming home.

Maybe he just needs time to think, you know?

He's had plenty of time to think.

Did he say anything about getting help?

He doesn't think he needs help.

Did he give you any clue about coming around?

No.

Then I don't know what to do.

I can't force him to change.

How did this happen?

I thought I brought him up right. It turns out to be a freak.

I can't even stand to look at him. He turns my stomach.

Well, if he wants to be a pervert, I can't stop him.

But I don't have to live with it.

He's made his choice, and I've made mine.

What about his stuff?

I don't want it.

You can keep it or give it a goodwill.

What if Ron comes home?

I don't want him in my house.

You just can't cut him out of your life.

He's your son.

He's not my son.

He's a fag.

Brent's not home.

No, she's not playing bridge.

How about your bag, though?

Yeah, thanks.

Hey, um, you ever get your mom's shelves up?

Yeah, finally.

It came out pretty good.

You should come over and check it out sometime.

Yeah, sure.

Hey, Ron, maybe we can catch a movie sometime, you know?

Yeah. Give me a call, huh?

I will.

Hey, ugly.

Hey, what, Pinhead?

You know that Kung Fu Festival?

Yeah.

It starts tomorrow. How about we go check it out?

Yeah, absolutely.

How about a pizza first?

Sounds great.

All right, I'll meet you at Lou's at 6 o 'clock.

Hey, I'll be there.

All right.

Don't be late. No way.