Original subtitles

Call me at the Regency.

Call me at the Palm Court.

I just have to leave town for a little while, that's all.

Lydia, I love you.

Billy, you are hurting me. Your dad seems like such a great guy. Don't get

bloody cheeky. Fathers and sons.

Complex business.

If you're checking up on me, don't. Just give me a chance to explain. Don't use

me. Now you're becoming an accessory.

Yes, I'll marry you.

And right here is where you start paying.

I'd rather tackle some of this paperwork.

Good, then maybe you can help us process these mid -semester applications.

Uh, organization's not my strong point. I wouldn't want to get in Lydia's way.

Oh, I change now, do you? How was your weekend?

Great, just great!

Come on, give us the scoop on your reunion.

Oh, not such a big deal. I saw a lot of old friends, ate a so -so dinner,

counted the ball heads, and then I came home. Oh, it was that bad.

Isn't there anything new?

and interesting we can talk about here.

Well, since you mention it.

Will you level with me?

You were so excited about seeing your old flame. What happened?

Billy Waters.

He didn't even show up.

And I wasn't that excited.

Lydia,

this is me you're talking to. Billy Waters is the only reason you went to

reunion.

Well, there's not that much going on in my life right now.

I've been thinking about him.

Oh.

Road not taken?

Oh. We couldn't get it together 15 years ago. I don't even know why I keep going

back to it.

But I do.

Well, why don't you look him up?

He's probably flabby, fussy, and doesn't remember my name.

Well, then forget about it. Don't drive yourself crazy. Oh, I could call him up

just for a laugh.

If I knew where he lived.

You know where he used to live?

Sit there in your shirt, please, man. It's inhuman.

You're joking.

It's the summer weather in England. Forty -two degrees?

Balmy.

Me mate used to say, give me a nice summer stay, I'll give you bus fare to

Brighton.

and the cover and the thermostat, and boom, I... You had him fix the furnace?

Donovan, what are you doing? You know, I told you I sent for an expert handyman.

But he's here.

Hello. Dad, what are you doing here? What do you think? He's here to fix the

furnace. Amazing.

Out of all the furnace guys in New York, they send your father.

I sent for him special.

It's in the back. You, work.

Just in any good time, by the look of him. Yeah, well, I...

Where do you spend your evening? You didn't say anything about fixing a

Dad.

You called me an arrogant.

You want some help?

No, no, you'd be okay.

You stay with your friends.

Look, I'm already dirty. I'll lend you a hand.

You know, beats being cold, you know what I mean?

I'd like to do with an assist.

Not to mention the company.

Here you go, MacDonald.

Your dad seems like such a great guy.

Yeah, everybody thinks so.

Just about every port we stopped in.

In fact, I remember. It was Hong Kong.

Oh, thank you, sweetheart.

Right, so we're in Hong Kong.

And in Hong Kong, all the bars, they're sort of underground and set up at the

side of the street.

It was Saturday night.

Short leave.

All decked up in our best white.

Headed into town. The first bar we went in, full of Australians, just came off

of the tanker. All big guys.

Your father's a born entertainer.

Yeah, you can tell tales. Best of them, can't he?

My old man's the same way.

It's a gift, you know. Straight up to this guy, straight in the face, insults

his wife with a name. Well, can't mention it. It's a lady present.

Good thing the bloke didn't decide to take on Dobby's mother when they talk

about it, he thought.

Uh, Dad, you know, Mum's probably got dinner on by now. We ought to be getting

out.

I don't like Ian. I mean, he's heard these stories. Yeah, a hundred times.

Um, she's probably going to be worried, yeah.

Isn't that just like him, eh? He's always concerned with other people's

feelings.

You're right.

Call your mum and tell her we're going to be a little bit late.

All right?

Where were we?

I was about to get greened by some dock worker.

That's it.

Goliath, Ian.

He's got Darby by the throat.

Picks up a bottle of scotch, right?

Just... Then I stepped in.

Yes,

Mrs. Waters.

Absolutely. I promise I'll come by for peach cobbler, yes. And if you see

please tell him I called and give him my number, yes.

Nice talking to you, too. Bye.

Well... Well, it only took eight phone calls, a wedding gift, and a promise to

teach the Chamber of Commerce ballroom dancing, and his mama still doesn't know

where he is. Well, you must have found something, huh?

He's an international stockbroker.

But since he dropped out of Harvard his junior year, he's been as scarce as

hen's teeth.

Pardon me?

He hasn't been around. Nobody's seen him. But he maintains an apartment in

London. But he doesn't stay there much either, darling. So that's all I got.

Well, at least you tried, huh?

And it didn't work.

Come on. Not sure yet.

What? Showcase night at Lou's. What?

Ian and Reggie are singing a duet. Oh, come on, Paul. I have work to do. Look,

have to work on my choreography for the dance recital. And I have all those damn

applications. You want to stay here with me tonight? Mm -mm. Well, don't say you

weren't invited. I was invited.

Everybody, welcome to Showcase Night at Louie's. We've got some terrific

entertainment for you tonight. Some of it from my old alma mater, School of the

Arts. But first, a special treat all the way from London, England.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Jack Ware. Come on, let's go.

What's up, Mrs.

Brisket?

Why not take the plunge and risk it?

The water's warm and there ain't no crabs, and you'll have a lot of fun

the shrimps and dabs. If poor a lark dumps off the old shark, takes a nipple

your chocolate biscuit, with it on the shore and the crowd will roar, What a

Mrs. Brickett!

What's up, Mrs.

Brisket? Why not take a punch and a risk it?

The water's warm and there ain't no crabs.

You'll have a lot of fun among the shrimps and dads.

If for a lot, some saucy old shark takes a nibble at your chocolate biscuit.

Swim for the shore and the crowd will roar.

What's up, Mrs.

Brisket? Come on, what's up, Mrs. Brisket?

Why not take a punch and risk it?

The water's warm and there ain't no crabs And you'll have a lot of fun among

shrimps And dad's here for a lot of softy Old shark takes a nibble at your

chocolate biscuit Swim for the shore and the crowd will roll What's home is this

brisket

to be flattered.

I hear you've been asking for me.

Billy Waters?

Billy Waters, is that really you?

As real as I'll ever be.

About as happy as I'll ever be.

After just 15 years? No way you can get shit in me that easy, girl.

Oh, Billy, what you been doing? We've been living like... Plenty of time for

questions later.

First things first.

You?

I've imagined you all over the world.

Really?

Such as?

Urgent, selling flowers on Champs -Élysées.

Queen on her barge on the Nile.

A geisha serving her team.

I wish I could have been there.

I've imagined you with me, too.

Miss exotic places.

The supermarket.

The cross -town bus.

Subway.

Excuse me.

Yes.

No.

No, no problem at all.

200 ,000 should cover it.

Okay, thanks.

I'm sorry.

Where were we?

You were on the Orient Express and I was on the subway.

But back to more important things.

As I recall, you could sing and dance at the same time.

In special request.

How about that number from our senior prom?

Never can you say goodbye.

No, no, no, no, no.

Well,

I just don't know the right thing. Roni looked good. The hoodoo casserole looked

great. I just couldn't decide, so I got him a bit of both.

Everything looked so good.

You've seen him, haven't you?

Well, can't be as good as a noodle roni.

Yes, it can.

Oh, Paul, I'd like you to meet Bill... Billy Waters.

The man with the style.

Oh, it's not style, Paul. It's just a taste for the best.

Well, this is Eli Sellers.

No, I haven't lost it.

The fact is, we got the best chance at filling water we ever had.

Hello.

Yes.

Oh, really?

What do you have?

Can you chill that and have it here by six o 'clock?

Terrific. Hey, thanks for calling.

Miss Grant?

Yeah? Clifton Bower.

Is Mr. Waters in, please?

No, not at the moment.

Billy said that he might be late, but I took a chance anyway.

Would you like to leave a message for him? No, that won't help. You see, I was

supposed to meet with Billy tomorrow, and now I'm stuck with this trip to

Washington tonight, and Billy promised to give me some figures.

Well, I'm sorry, but Billy just can't be reached right now.

Miss Grant, I really need those figures.

Do you think you could check and see if maybe he has my file around here?

Oh, I don't think I can. Well, he told me that he was staying with you. He gave

me your address. He gave me your phone number.

I'm sure Billy wouldn't mind.

All right, well, just hang on. I'll see if I can find him if you're looking.

How do you spell Bauer? B -A -U -E -R.

Mill initial L for Leonard.

Would you like my tax ID number?

Sure. Why don't you humor me?

95 -555 -3867.

Mr. Bower, you passed the test.

Great. May I?

I just need to make some notes. Sure.

Hey,

where have you been?

We rocked loose last night. Oh, yeah.

I've been getting pretty deep into reading for this music assignment.

Oh, do you have any time to listen to what I've done for the assignment?

Yes? How about, um... I don't know, about 7 o 'clock?

Yeah. Do I lose?

And a saucy little walk as we go down here, and a little... Hey, I've been

looking all over for you.

Yeah. Your dad's going to teach me that number that he didn't lose the other

night. Great.

And I've got your friends coming over to the house tonight, so don't forget to

let your mum know, all right?

Oh, grab a pizza or something nice on the way home?

Yeah. Oh, Dad.

We can't. Jesse and I have got to work on our assignment for Swarovski's.

Work it out, please.

Yeah, I don't see why not.

Bye.

Doing it again.

What is that?

Hanging about it loose and showing up here altogether getting in the way.

I'm only trying to be friendly.

If you're checking up on me, don't.

Ian, you're far too tense by half. Loosen up a bit.

Look, I've got to go. Union Hall called and every job can't...

Cheer up that puss it's quite disheartening

Number two, music.

Three, me.

How was your day?

Not nearly as good as my evening is going to be.

You miss me?

I spent the day with one of the richest men in New York.

Cruising the Hudson, eating lobster, closing a major deal, and you ask me if

missed you?

Every minute, I repeat my mind on business.

Good. Because I'm worth it.

I won't argue with that.

Was my stuff getting your way today?

No. One of your clients came by.

He had to look at some figures. And when did you start giving out my address for

your business?

Which client?

Clifton Bower.

He was here?

Yeah, around 4 o 'clock.

He said he won't be able to make a meeting tonight.

He's a good -looking guy, huh? Great blue eyes.

If you'd like the title.

Show me his figures.

Is something wrong?

No.

If I can forget about business, you can.

and give me one of those fabulous smiles.

I'd give you more than that.

I never thought that friar would see the light of day again.

Listen, Jack, could you look at my mic please before you go? I'm getting

feedback like crazy. Yeah, sure.

Kids tell me you've been teaching them some of the numbers, you know.

Oh, just passing on the expertise of a lifetime of puppetry, you know.

Ian, I gotta tell you, your old man is great.

Whether he's out front on the boards or out back on the wires.

I'm real

sorry I couldn't bother Peter last night.

It was a bit awkward for your friends and me, you're not showing up.

Dad, you noticed.

Don't get bloody cheeky.

Where were you?

They didn't come to see me.

You important, I'm sure you kept him entertained.

And as a matter of fact, I did.

And if you'll excuse me, I've got to get my tools.

Hi, Ian.

You want something to eat?

Are you okay?

I'm fine.

Your dad could fix just about anything. Did you see that pinball machine back

there that was broken?

Yeah. That's just about perfect, isn't it? Yeah, he's a great guy.

You were telling us about that time when you were 100.

Hey, leave him!

What's the matter with you?

I'm just a little tired of the great Jack Watt.

Come on, I like him.

You know, we're all come from... We're smart enough to know that if a bloke is

everybody's friend...

If anything was just a song and a joke, I...

Ian?

Ian!

I

just

have to leave town for a little while, that's all.

How long is the little while?

Trust me, baby, I'll be back.

That's exactly what I said to you 15 years ago when I left to go to New York.

I don't hold grudges.

Excuse me, Miss Grant.

Mr. Bowen.

Elias Sellers, Federal Securities Agency.

Special investigator.

I'm sorry we deceived you the other night, but we need your help.

I don't like phonies and I don't appreciate liars.

Then what are you hanging around waters for?

Goodbye. You're in over your head, Miss Grant.

I've been watching Billy Waters for a long time, or Billy Welburn, or William

Dawson. He's one of the biggest scam artists this agency's ever gone after.

If you don't get your buns and gear, we're going to be here until midnight.

Thought you'd be grateful for the help. Yeah, but I didn't think you were going

to move slow as a snail.

What is really bothering you? I should have known.

I just should have known.

Anyone that's good -looking, that's smart, that's slick, who would want him

anyway?

Liar. It's some fantasy I've been carrying around. Just been carrying

You want to tell me what happened?

Paul, it's just that... It's just that I knew who he was 15 years ago, but

now I don't even have a clue.

Well, maybe you'll get to know him. It just takes some time.

I don't even know if I want to find out.

And if I did, I don't even know where he is.

May I help you?

Yeah.

I want you to have a look at this person my son's always talking about.

You are Benjamin Sharofsky?

I am, and I would guess you are the celebrated Mr. Ware.

Well, I don't know about celebrated.

That's more Ian.

In fact, half the time I wonder how this old monk fathered such a time.

He gets on very well here.

Yeah.

Do you mind telling me how you do it?

Do what?

Get along with Ian.

Oh, but I don't. Your son and I argue most of the time.

Well, to hear him talk, you know, you'd never believe it.

I mean, it's Swarovski this, Swarovski that. I mean, we argue most of the time,

too.

I doubt very much he talks to his teachers about me.

Well, we disagree about music.

And we just disagree.

Fathers and sons, complex business.

I try to know the boy.

I mean, I come round and he gets irritable.

I open up my house to his friends, he loses his temper.

Do you know, if I spoke to my father the way he speaks to me... I also grew up

in a very strict household.

The most intimate thing I know about my father is his brand of pipe tobacco.

But this is a new generation. I doubt you and I will ever understand.

One thing I'm sure of.

Teachers move in and out of a child's life and are forgotten.

Fathers, never.

You. I didn't mean to startle you.

Startle doesn't even begin to cover it.

Hey, it's not every day a girl can come home and find a notorious stock swindler

hiding out in her bathroom.

Did the fellas really call me notorious?

Among other things.

Well, whatever he told you, he's not lying.

I know that.

I'm good at what I do.

I know that, too.

You always have been.

And I don't hurt anybody, Lydia.

At least not anybody who doesn't deserve it.

You take a guy like Bauer.

He made his money in illegal sweatshops.

He hasn't paid taxes in years.

He's looking for something for nothing.

It's my pleasure to provide it. And that makes what you do right, huh?

Billy, what's the matter?

Nothing.

What's the matter with you?

Lydia, I need your help. I'll get an ambulance. No. Billy, you are hurt.

bleeding. Doctors mean police reports.

I got somebody that can take care of this.

There's just one thing you can do.

What?

A briefcase.

If I'm not back by nine o 'clock, take it to the Chez Leon.

The real Clifton Bauer will be there waiting. Billy, you are not going. You

to let me call someone. Promise me you'll do this.

Where is that old peddler?

Well, he's been unavoidably detained, but he asked me to please apologize to

for any inconvenience we might have caused you. Honey, I only get

when I skip my prunes in the morning.

We'll have a toddy and do a little business talk.

Well, I have everything for you, signed, sealed, and ready to deliver.

Okay. Here's my end of the horse trade.

Let's see your cards, bright eyes.

Mr. Bauer.

Elias Sellers, federal securities agent.

Government dole. How nice for you, Mr. Sellers. Sir, you're the victim of a

sophisticated competence game.

That's ridiculous.

You wouldn't listen to me, would you? Now you're becoming an accessory.

Sir, if you'll just examine these documents I have, you'll see that the

you're going to invest in does not even exist.

Well, son, Watson's services appears to be worth the shell.

But I already knew that. What? Mr. Waters informed me several days ago that

Watson was worse than Louisiana bottomlands.

That's why I'm caught in a serious interest in Kimberlene Wells.

This is impossible.

Mr. Grant, show this gentleman the transaction paper.

What's the matter?

I don't think I really should let him view these private documents.

I don't think Mr. Waters would approve.

Can't you see that she's stalling? I'll get you a new section right away.

The papers, Miss Grant.

Yes.

Kimberly and Grant.

Just what I told you.

Waters is not going to get away with this.

We didn't.

We didn't do anything.

Come on, Lydia.

Make up.

And celebrate.

How's your gunshot wound?

What can I say? I'm a fast hitter. Yeah? Well, let me see how fast you can heal

from this.

Lydia.

Just give me a chance to explain. You used me.

Not a lover, not a friend, just another... Not gonna be manipulated.

I did it for you. Oh, yeah, and all I thought about the whole time was the

wound, the phoning wound.

Do you have any idea what it did to me, how I felt?

I really thought... Oh, you're just the best, you're the total best. I needed

you to keep sellers off balance for a while, that's all.

If anything had gone wrong, I was there. I would have told them you were just

another mark. Which is exactly what I want. You know better than that.

I love you, Lydia.

Go away, Billy.

We've got too many problems.

We've got 600 ,000 solutions right here in this briefcase.

Come on, baby.

Say that you'll come with me.

All right.

All right, I'm going.

Here, you hold on to the mic.

You think about me.

Think about us.

All of our dreams come true.

So, um, I'm having a bit of an odd time with this Mozart thing. I wonder if you

could give me a little help.

I could give it to you, but I won't.

You need the discipline of digging in through the difficult ones.

Frankly, I don't understand why you're having any trouble.

You know, I've got a lot on my mind.

The truth is... I'm not exactly getting on with me dad.

That is a disgrace, isn't it, Father, like that?

I mean, there's one of them in every pub in England. You throw him a quid and

he'll sing you a randy song.

Only he's not content with winning over the local crowd. He's got to nick my

friends as well.

Why?

I don't know why.

Because he doesn't want me to have my own life.

Because he's jealous.

Because he doesn't want to get old.

I don't know.

Why don't you talk to him? Tell him how you feel.

I can't.

We don't exactly talk very well.

Then think about it, Mr. Ware.

As I said, you need the discipline of getting through the difficult questions

yourself.

And believe me, a father is worth the effort.

Now, if you'll excuse me.

Well, he's consistent.

I'll save that for him.

Call me at the Regency.

A -S -A -P.

Call me at the Palm Court before eight.

Lydia, I love you.

Leave a message at my hotel.

He's back.

It's serious.

It's serious, all right.

Do you want these or do you want me to just keep stacking them up?

I don't know. You don't know?

He seems like such a doll.

What happened now?

You got about a month? Just tell me, you going away with him?

That's a good question.

And the answer is?

I think I'll let him decide that.

I'm only that.

Listen, about the other day, I had a lot on my mind and you happened to be

handy.

Yeah, well, maybe someday you'll be handy when I have a lot on my mind.

Not if I'm lucky.

Excuse me.

Well, eh?

Bloody boring in here, isn't it?

Imagine I could use a bit of an entertainment.

What?

What's happened to have men about time?

I like it.

Eh?

Eh?

Ladies and gentlemen, for your pleasure, a bit of the weather.

We're two chaps who find it thrilling to do the killing. We're always willing to

give the girls a treat.

Or just a drink at the rip.

Call it double or quit.

Then we feel the world is at our feet.

Top hats, white spats, look divine on us. There's a shine on us. Get the line

us when we come your way.

Dad, eleven o 'clock.

Oh, let's pop into the truck.

And we start the business of the day.

As we stroll down

Piccadilly in the bright morning

air, all the girls turn and

stare. Ooh, we're so numb.

and frightfully debonair.

When we chat to Rose

Maud or Lily, you should see the way their boyfriends prawn.

For they know without a doubt that their luck's drawn out up against a

couple of men about town.

That we stroll down.

Oh, and pick, pick a deli all the girls say.

Oh, oh dear.

Oh, put your hat aside, my dear.

But it's Mama Duke.

And Percy the Deer. As we talk.

Hats. Each pretty filly gives a wink and after Dane looks down.

Well, they long with all their might for a red -hot night. When they see a

couple of men about, see a couple of men about, see a couple of men about time.

Do you know I can go just about anywhere and be chummed with a mob?

Uptown or downtown.

Ten minutes tops.

I mean, why can't I be friends with you?

I suppose you've been trying a bit too hard, man.

You've been a bit tough for yourself, you know.

I mean, I'm not trying to compete with you, if that's what you mean.

That's what I thought.

I guess it took me a bit of time to change my mind.

You and I... are different.

But I don't think that has to come between us.

I mean, I know it's not going to be easy, but I suppose you were worth the

effort.

I like that, Ian.

You're right, you know, we're not so different.

I mean, I do the old song and dance.

You walk around with a guitar on your hip.

Of course, the upshot of the whole thing is that we're both so bloody

fascinating.

Well, that's true.

away from eternal happiness.

Kelly Waters, you are one of a kind.

And do you love him?

Yeah, I guess.

Enough to marry me?

Lord knows I've tried to resist you.

And the answer is...

We'll hit your apartment first, then to the airport in the Mediterranean. Wait a

minute now. Wait a minute, Billy.

There's one condition.

Anything, bae. This is serious, Billy.

If you want to marry me, you have to change your line of work.

You got it.

Just that simple, huh?

Well, the idea has occurred to me, too, you know.

Lydia, now that I got you back in my life...

Maybe I can't start a legitimate business with you.

You do have the dowry, don't you? Oh, yes, yes.

It's still in the briefcase. You left it.

But this is part of the deal.

If you're going to make a change, I want you to start now. Right here.

You have to give this money back, Billy.

Billy, you're smart enough to do anything you want to do, be anything you

to be.

Poor and honest.

That's the concept I'd have to sneak up on slowly.

I'll consider it, I'll say.

When we get to Rome, what happens, we'll work it all out.

Billy, Billy.

I can't go anywhere with you. I don't even know why I even was foolish enough

try. You can't change, you'll never change.

Take your money, Billy. Take it.

Too much responsibility for me.

And so are you.

Lydia, I gotta go.

Sellers is getting too close.

Don't give up on me, huh?

I can't give you another 15 years, Billy.

I'm not asking for that

Hello?

Clifton Bower, please.

Tell him Lydia Grant is calling and that I have something of his I'd like to

return.