Original subtitles

I'd like to make you a junior agent.

Congratulations,

Danny.

Are you sure? Danny got me an audition.

Out there is the real world, and I'm gonna make it.

Are you saying it's my fault?

I don't like this at all. The boy's in over his head.

You got big dreams.

You want fame?

Well, fame's caught.

And right here's where you start paying.

was for you to love me.

I'm your own son.

And you treat me like you don't even know me.

Like I'm not even there.

I never told anybody this.

But when Johnny died, when he died, I was almost glad.

No, I thought, maybe now you'll notice me.

My own brother dies, and that's the way you make me feel?

Well, that's how bad I wanted you to love me.

I thought, I think my concentration was off.

Sensational. Yeah.

Did you hear a cough?

Did you hear anybody moving in their seats? Did you hear any whispering in

back row?

I guess I didn't.

All right.

Let's throw it out to the class.

Anybody.

I thought it was beautiful.

Just beautiful, Danny.

It was.

I gotta admit it, Emmett Toole. You had me going there, buddy.

I really felt his pain.

Like he really wanted his father's love, you know? What were you using?

Using?

I'm just using myself.

Danislavski tells us that we should find the wounded hyena in our past.

And I think you really did that, Danny.

Excuse me, wounded hyena?

You know, when I was up here acting, I was thinking about something.

What's her name?

I'm serious.

I was thinking about last year when my father wanted me to quit the school and

give up acting.

I mean, I tried to make him understand, but I couldn't get through.

And I tried telling him that acting was the most important thing in the world to

me. And that I loved it.

And that if I couldn't act anymore, I would be a different Danny Amatulo.

Yeah, is this the Haskell Stocking Agency?

Could I speak to Mr. Starkey?

Yeah, it's about getting representation.

Uh -huh. My name is Leroy Johnson, and I was just hoping I could get an

interview with Mr. Starkey.

No, I'm not performing anything right now. That's why I need an agent.

All right.

I understand.

Thanks anyway.

Don't get discouraged, Leroy.

Sooner or later, somebody's going to say yes.

I'm not discouraged.

I mean, he's one of the biggest agents in town. I wasn't aiming too high.

Ah, but man's reach should exceed his grasp of what's a heaven for.

I like that.

Where'd you think that went up at?

I didn't. Robert Browning did.

For if we never reach it all, we can hope for nothing but ordinary lives and

knowledge that heaven shall be forever outside our grasp.

Hey, this Browning guy wasn't half bad.

That was Elizabeth Sherwood.

I can sling it with the best of them.

Okay,

we're going to take a short break before the next act, so everybody eat up and

drink up and order some more, because somebody's got to pay for this wonderful

entertainment.

What time is it, Jeffy?

It's cold. He said he'd be here, okay?

You know, the break's only 15 minutes long. Where is he?

Who does this most thirsty guy think he is, anyway?

Levi said he's the biggest agent in town, right?

Did you talk to him personally?

Almost. I spoke to his secretary.

No, I mean, you can't speak to his secretary. You've got to go right up

and speak to the main man himself.

Yeah, Danny's right.

I mean, you've got to talk to the actual Moe. And just how am I supposed to do

that? Well, you know, the phone business? Well, that's wrong, man.

walk straight up to the office.

You know, I don't see the point in our performing here every night if nobody

ever comes to see us. What do you mean, nobody?

Last week we had the International Ladies Garment Workers Union bowling

here. The place was packed.

Come on, kids, get ready. You go on in five minutes.

Lou, what's the point? No way. Moe Starkey's not going to show.

Moe Starkey?

That's my agent.

You're with Moe Starkey? Uh -huh.

You think you can get him to come down here and see us?

I can't even get him to come down here and see me.

Moe doesn't see anybody unless they're real big.

I never even met him.

Except once I bumped into him at Tavern on a Green.

Tavern on a Green?

He eats lunch there every day.

What are you thinking?

Hey, if Mohammed won't come to the mountain, maybe we should take the

over to Tavern on the Green.

Here you go, Mr. Starkey.

Enjoy your squab.

I always do.

I'm just deciding on what table I should wait on next.

You know, decisions, decisions.

Who's going to be the next lucky group?

I'm just dying to find out.

Me too.

Um, what about that table over there?

Mr. Starkey, please. I promise you're going to love it.

Okay?

Thank you.

All right, come on, let's do it, guys.

Hey, look me over.

Tell me, do you like what you see?

Hey,

I ain't got no money.

But honey, I'm rich on personality.

You will see our point of view, even if we have to scream and shout.

Hey, baby, I'm a star.

You might not know it now, baby, but I am. I'm a star.

I'm a one of a kind. Till I reach the top. Sing it. We are the stars.

Hey, take a listen.

Tell me, do you like what you hear?

If it don't turn you on, just say the word and I'm gone. But honey, I know

nothing wrong with your head.

Hey, check it all out.

Better look now, check my tea too late.

My luck's gonna change tonight.

Mr. Starkey. Well, I mean, did you love it or what? I'm sorry, Mr. Starkey. This

young man bribed one of my waiters to get to you. He bribed a waiter? I'll

him thrown out immediately.

Let him go, Henry. Let him go?

I'm interested in this young man.

I think he's got potential.

Sit down, kid.

Hey, me? Are you interested in me?

Have some squab.

Squab? I'd be a honey.

Grabbed away to heaven.

That was the easy part.

The hard part was getting a reservation for my friends. You know, this isn't

exactly the easiest place to get into. I know.

How'd you pull that one off?

Well, I put the reservation under the name of Ed Koch.

I mean, who's not going to let the mayor in, right?

You do this kind of thing often?

Only when I got to meet a big person like yourself.

You interest me, kid.

I'd like to make you an offer.

Hey, I'll sign. You know, five, ten years.

I mean, I know it takes time for a new talent to get developed, but I work real

hard at it. I mean, I could become the next whoever you want me to be. And as

far as that star mentality, well, you don't got to worry about that with me.

I'm not.

I want to make you an intern.

Well, it's nice that you're interested, man, but I ain't got the money to go to

medical school.

You don't understand. I want you to be an intern agent with Haskell Stocking.

But I'm an actor.

Listen to me, kid.

I know actors.

Leave me.

Oh, come on, M2. You, a big -time, asshole, stocky agent.

Oh, geez, what's so amazing about that? It's just that you're an actor, man. I

mean, you've been going to school to be an actor, right? Right, man. You ain't

been going to agent school.

Besides, agents are smart.

Son, man, get out of here, man. This is serious, okay? Well, if you do decide to

join the agency, there is a bright side. That's right.

What's that?

You can make Jesse and I major stars.

Ta -da!

Think of the satisfaction, man. Not to mention the fact that you'd always be

first one to know about jobs. That's right. But isn't he saying I should take

it? I don't know, man.

You ain't no agent, man. You're a born actor.

It's true.

On the other hand, if you don't like it, you can always quit.

It's true, too.

And I don't know what I'm doing.

Yo, man.

Yo, all my life I wanted to perform.

I mean, I want my name up in the marquee. I want my picture in lights.

Then tell them no, man.

Yeah, and then what if nothing happens, man? What am I going to do, stand on the

corner selling shoes?

I mean, come on, man. I could be making a lot of money being a big -time agent.

I could be staying at a place like this.

Yeah, and Sheridan, you know I can dig that myself.

Yeah, I could see myself in the presidential suite. Yo, man, I could see

in the bridal suite.

Then you'd have to get married.

Yeah, that's right.

Well, maybe just a sweep, then.

Such a knucklehead.

Just a sweep.

You can't talk to Moe, Clyde. He left for L .A. early this morning.

I know he's your agent. What am I, chicken soup?

No, Clyde. How did you get past the secretary?

Just a second, Clyde.

We don't see actors today. We see them on Thursdays. Just leave your picture

resume.

I sympathize, Clive. I'm Danny Amatulo.

What?

Danny Amatulo.

Oh, you're the new kid. Oh, God, right.

God, with that face, I could have sworn you were an actor. I'm Brenda Haskell,

Moe's partner. Hi.

What do you mean you walked?

Love Happy opens in three days. You can't quit.

Your office is down the hall. You're going to love it. It's got a window in

Yes. No, I just told you, he's not here, Clive. Clive, have you been drinking?

No.

Hello. Haskell Stocking Agency.

Out of the question, Clive. Do you have a contract?

Um, he's not in town right now. What, you already told him? Would you not?

She's on the other phone. Clive.

Mr. Berenson?

For Duthor of Love, Happy? Love, Happy is a hot -off -Broadway musical.

You can't quit. I heard he quit. He dances dreamy.

We're trying to change his mind. No, I know. I will not get you out of it.

You're into the run of the play. You don't want him back? Yes.

Don't blow up, Clive.

How many leads do you think there are for Black Dancers?

Black Dancers?

That's what I said. I think we do.

Yes, thank you, Clive. I think he's available.

You know what a contract means.

You know what? Let me get back to you.

That's it for the run of the show.

Let me speak to Leroy Johnson.

I don't care if he's busy teaching class. Get him. This is important.

Yeah, we're just going to stand together and do one tough video, man. What are

we going to do with it? We're going to sell it to MTV. What do you think?

Great, thanks.

Did y 'all get it? You know we got it. Of course we got it.

We forgot to roll the tape.

Mr. Johnson, Leroy Johnson, you have a telephone call.

You don't mind doing it again, do you?

What do you mean I forgot to roll the tape? You're the cameraman. You were

sitting right in front of it, can't you see? You got it, Danny. I'll be right

there. All right!

All right!

Miss Sherwood, Danny got me an audition.

Addison Locke, they're desperate.

Fame and fortune, here I come. All right!

Miss Sherwood, there is a habit after all.

Count on it.

You've been seeing him, haven't you?

You've been going out with him. No, I haven't.

He's just a friend and he needs me right now. You're lying.

Yo, I'm sitting down looking through a bunch of 8x10 glasses. Guess who walks

by? I don't know.

Al Pacino.

No.

Tony!

He's really short, man. The guy's short, but he got charisma.

Speaking of charisma, you think you'd give me an interview up there? He ain't

the only big guy I met either, Chris. I'm telling you. Would you even know the

truth if you heard it?

Are you two crazy?

You're not listening to me, are you, too?

Oh, sorry, man.

Hey, did I tell you I miss Shirley MacLaine?

Beautiful lady. Beautiful.

It's your cue.

What? Your cue.

Oh. Tony.

What do you want? What do you think I am? All right, all right. Hold it, hold

it.

Amatula, why were you late for your entrance?

I'm sorry, Miss Persky. It won't happen again.

You said that yesterday.

Come on. A sorry doesn't cut it.

You've been late for a lot of cues lately and forgetting your line.

It was my fault. I was talking to him.

Don't do him any favors, Donlon.

Amatulo's got the lead in this play. He's on stage 90 % of the time. It's his

responsibility. Miss Persky, I said it won't happen again, okay?

Okay doesn't cut it either. Now, are you interested in this part or not?

Hey, Amatulo!

Amatulo! Hey, I got the part, man.

Lead dancer with lines off -Broadway. Yo, man!

Congratulations, Leroy. That's beautiful.

Man, you're a genius. What an agent. Yo, you didn't sign anything, did you?

Nope. And what about the dressing room? You know, your part's big enough for you

to have your own toilet.

What? Uh -huh, and air conditioning, too, man. Let's not forget the air

conditioning. Hey, they didn't tell me nothing about that. It'll be in your

contract. Seriously?

I'll see to it.

I'm a two -law.

You think we can get back to the play?

Play? Yeah, you know, the one we're rehearsing.

Yo, man, I gotta go back and rehearse. All right. Hey, let's do lunch.

I hear you've been sending out non -clients to auditions through Haskell

Starkey, is that so?

Well, only one, and he got the job. Uh -huh.

And on top of that, as a part -time intern,

you've been handling as much as Haskell here.

I'd like to make you a junior agent.

Congratulations, Danny. Yes!

And I think when I first met you, I thought you were an actor.

So, what do you say?

I don't know.

I really am an actor.

Look, Danny, you're going to have to make a choice.

I'm offering you a big shot here.

Do you want it or don't you?

Sure, I want it.

But this acting thing is kind of hard to get out of your system.

Look, kid, I deal with actors every day. They break your heart.

Because most of them come up short.

And it's got nothing to do with talent.

It's a reality.

Yeah, but I haven't even tried.

I mean, maybe I would be able to make a living at it.

I'm opening the door for you, Danny.

All you've got to do is walk through.

I've been giving it a lot of thought. I think it's the best thing.

You think Miss Percy's going to mind?

Why don't you ask her?

Yeah, why don't you ask her, Amatulo?

Yeah, Miss Percy, you know I've been having a lot of trouble with this

all right?

Yep.

I think I'm too busy to do it justice.

Uh -huh.

So I was thinking, since Darling's got one line, maybe we could switch.

I mean, he is my understudy.

And I am right up in the part.

Darling, not that you wouldn't be fine in the part.

Danny, you fought for this part. You worked your butt off for it.

Now you're willing to give it up just like that?

I guess I am.

Okay.

Done.

We didn't go in the school. You'll break a leg. I'll break two.

Giving this part up doesn't mean anything to you?

You should be in pain.

Hey, it's not that it doesn't bother me.

I have to decide what's important, that's all.

Didn't you decide that when you came to this school?

Yeah, but things change.

Yeah, I know.

Hey, well, I got to make some phone calls. Thank you.

Yo, Leroy, just the man I want to see.

Yo. Um, uh, I think I got you the dressing room with the shower and the

conditioning. We're that close. Ha ha, you are something else.

Yo, don't thank me for your stuff.

By the way, don't say no offstage dialogue.

I think I'll get you some extra money for it. Will do.

All right, babe.

Be good.

I don't like this at all. The boy's in over his head.

Well, I hate to say it, Miss Percy, but he does all right by me.

Lucky you.

You'll be dancing away on some stage and I'll be watching a talented kid like

that lose what he's dreamed of his whole life.

Are you saying it's my fault?

I'm saying that you're a teacher too now.

You got a responsibility outside of yourself.

It's his choice.

He's giving up the little jerk and he doesn't even know it.

Greta, my wife thinks I do this to avoid getting a job.

Greta, I think, don't be crazy. I just can't make up my mind what hat to wear

the office. Ernie, Ernie, Ernie, Ernie.

It's not I can't make up my mind. It's I can't decide.

I can't decide what hat to wear to the office.

You see, it's the rhythm. The rhythm's what makes it funny. Yeah, I keep

forgetting that I'm such a dumb cop.

Hey, Ernie, come sit down. I want to make a change with the hat.

I don't know, Mr. Amatillo.

But I always dress with the same head. Hey, Ernie, call him Danny. We're all

friends here.

Hey, Lou, he calls me what he calls me, okay?

Look, Ernie, I was walking by the store, and I thought of you. I bought you

something.

Ha -ha.

What do you think?

Come on, Danny. The guy's not a clown.

Hey, look, I'm his agent, okay?

I mean, do I come around here criticizing your bowling facilities?

It's poetry.

Believe me, Ernie, poetry.

Really? As a matter of fact, I'm not too happy about the color.

Hey, Lou, don't you got some lanes that need waxing?

I'm going, kid.

I gotta tell you, in all the years I've been in business, I have never had

anybody look out for me the way you do.

To tell you the truth, Before you became my agent, I think Husky and Starkey was

going to drop me. That's baloney.

Pure baloney. Hey, as long as you're with me, you're protected.

Hey, Ernie, man, you're my client.

Oh, my God.

Hey, I got a 5 o 'clock across town.

Ernie, practice.

With the beanie.

Hey, you practice with the beanie, you'll own the cat skills.

You're beautiful.

The question is, how do we determine the percentage of an unreal number when

there are this many variables?

Sorry, Mr. Morlock.

What am I, in the wrong class?

Mr. Morlock had a board meeting. I'm his understudy.

Danny, even though you're late, I'm sure you've done your homework. You tell us

how to find this percentage.

Well, percentages are funny things, Miss Sherwood. Are we talking net or gross?

We're talking unreal numbers. Well, you've come to the right person.

Miss Sherwood, I have seen some unreal numbers lately.

Do you know how much Paul Newman makes a week?

No, I don't know how much Paul Newman makes. I don't care.

How much?

Actually, it's privileged information.

Ah.

Well, in that case, do you think we can get back to the question at hand?

Percentages, right?

Okay. Say you have a back -end payment of...

30 % when your client hits syndication.

Now, he may not get that far.

So your percentage of his percentage goes down the toilet tubes.

Danny, we're talking math, not show business.

That's why you wanted some of those unreal numbers you were talking about up

front. Right? I mean, there's percentages.

And then we haven't even discussed the investment tax credit.

And most importantly, what about firing, Ms. Sherwood?

What kind of numbers are we talking about?

Right, the whole package.

Including syndication.

Two and a half million?

Okay.

Okay, I'll get back to you.

Thank you. Bye.

Oh, Danny, you really like the agent stuff, huh?

I like the action. Yeah.

Is that why we haven't been seeing much of you?

Yeah, I've been swamped. Hey, yesterday I bought my first box of Maylocks.

And the thing is, Holly, I'm good at it.

Yeah, but Danny, you're good at acting, too.

You know how much an actor makes in this business? A buck 280 every ten years.

And that's if he's Robert Redford.

Yeah. Yeah, but don't you miss it.

Hey, when opportunity knocks, you gotta knock back.

I was... I was almost glad.

Because I thought maybe now you'd notice me.

My own brother died.

That's how bad you made me feel.

That's how bad I wanted you to love me.

Abitulo! Uh, line.

You gotta be kidding me.

I'm not kidding. I just went blank.

You mean to tell me you got one lousy line in this play and you can't remember

it?

I remember it now.

Hey, he's talking to you.

Listen to him, Pop.

Okay?

No.

It's not okay.

Would you give me a break?

No, I'm under a lot of pressure.

Well, so am I. I got a play to put up here.

And I need actors, not agents.

But it's a loudly part with one line.

I mean, what are you making such a big deal about it for?

Because you're blowing it.

You're blowing your whole life, and you don't even know it. I'm not blowing it.

I'm making it. This school is a fairy tale. Out there is the real world, and

gonna make it.

Do you know what makes me really upset, Danny?

That you got a gift.

And you don't even care.

Get off my stage.

What?

You heard me. You're fired.

Out.

All right, everybody, let's go.

Take it from the top of Don and Steve.

What are you waiting for, Amatulo?

Get lost.

We got actors working here.

How are you, Danny?

Hey, what are you doing here?

Oh, don't ask me. They called me in. Must be big doings of some sort.

You didn't book me at the Sands and forgot to tell me, did you?

Ernie, if I booked you at the Sands, you'd be the first to know. Believe me.

Well, I brought the heads so I could show them some of our new ideas.

What do you think, huh?

It's a killer, man. A real killer.

I'll be right back.

Hey, Danny. How you doing?

What's up?

I was wondering about Ernie.

Ernie?

Ernie who?

What Ernie?

Ernie Shank.

You know, the hat changer.

He's waiting outside.

That old vaudevillian?

Is he still waiting out there?

That's terrible.

You better tell him.

Tell him what?

We're cutting him loose.

Well, just like that?

Why? The guy hasn't earned bupkis in ten years. He'd be better off with a

smaller agent.

Hey, it's no trouble. I don't mind handling him.

Why do we got to cut him loose?

Danny, I didn't bring you here to handle hat acts.

Hat acts?

Mo, we're talking about a man's life here.

You think I don't know that, huh?

What, do you think this is fun for me?

So then why do we got to do it?

I mean, why can't we just carry him?

We're not into charity here.

This is a business.

Where would we be if we carried all the Ernie Shanks out there?

It's just that Ernie's delicate.

You know, rejection like this can really break a guy.

Did I ever tell you that I used to be an actor?

No. I never heard of you.

No offense.

I'm sure you were great.

I stunk.

Just the way Ernie stinks.

And somebody did me a favor and told me, the way I'm doing Ernie a favor.

This is a ruthless business, kid.

And you gotta make tough decisions.

And you don't always have to love him.

He goes.

This is no way to change your mind, huh?

No way.

Kind of figured I wasn't going to open it this time.

Figured I could trust you, though.

Come on, Ernie.

No, it's all right.

I don't know why I ever thought that a stupid kid could help me.

Here's your head back.

Stupid propeller.

You know, I bought this for you.

I don't want it. I don't work with you anymore.

Keep your piece of dirt agency in your stupid ideas.

I am a performer, an artist, understand?

Maybe I'm not a big shot agent, but when I go out on stage, I have dignity.

What do you have?

I'm not trying to prove anything. I just want the truth.

Do you even know it if you heard it?

All right, time out.

Time out. Everybody on stage, please, now.

Okay, let's go.

Would somebody mind telling me what's going on?

I'm bored to death.

I don't know about everybody else, but I need a live audience to work off of. I

think that it's time for the play to go up.

All right, hold it.

Let me tell you something.

Every time that you go out on that stage, you are obligated to give 100%.

know why?

Because you are people who are privilege to perform on a stage, to breathe life

into a character, to make people cry, to make them laugh, to make them feel

something.

You have the power to change people's lives with your talent.

Your job is to make magic.

So the next time that you go out there and you feel bored and stale and tired,

remember this.

We are actors.

All right, let's take it from the top.

My whole life, I just wanted you to love me.

I'm your own son.

I'll treat you like I'm not even there.

They tried to tell me That I couldn't take

a chance this time But now it's just a

moment away Can't you see it in my eyes

Why am I feeling

Like a prisoner trapped inside my mind.

I've been hurt, been through it before.

I just can't walk away this time.

But now my heart is under attack.

The walls are breaking down and I can't hold.

But too strong I can't hold back I can't hold

back You

say you

know me And the dream that I've been searching for

It won't break my heart.

I can't risk it anymore.

But now my heart is under attack.

The walls are breaking down and I can't walk anymore.

The feeling is much...

This movie can't afford him.

Dustin?

So sweet.

I don't believe he's Italian.

Guys, we need someone they can afford. We need an unknown.

Somebody ethnic.

Italian.

Sense of humor.

Shorter than Bert.

But electric.

I got the guy.

Who?

Me.

I'm Italian.

Great sense of humor.

shorter than just about anybody danny what are you talking about saying i

i made a mistake i'm not an agent i ain't got the temperament for it no i

disagree i thought you were brilliantly ruthless with any shame i don't think

you're helping matters any see mo it's not a privilege to be an agent but to

perform on stage to breathe life into a character i mean to make people really

feel something that's a privilege

Thanks for everything, Mom.

Thank you, Brenda.

You know, Brenda, I think he might be an actor after all.

All my life, I wanted you to love me.

I'm your own son, and you treat me like I'm not even there.

When Johnny died, I was almost glad.

Because I thought maybe now you'd notice me.

My own brother died. That's how bad you made me feel.

That's how bad I wanted you to love me.

Hey, he's talking to you.

Would you listen to him, Pop?

He never listened to me. He never will.

I don't even know why I tried.

I don't even know why I stay here anymore.

Maybe I shouldn't.

Maybe it's on my left.