Original subtitles

Previously on Georgie & Mandy's First Marriage...

That was Channel Seven, they want me

to fill in for the regular weather girl on Friday.

Heather with the Weather?

Heather has to go

to her grandma's funeral in El Paso.

Which is obviously sad.

You don't look sad.

Well, I am.

Overnight, into the morning, we'll be seeing

some wind gusts which should clear out those clouds.

Dang, she's really good.

Heather will be back with the weather on Monday,

unless she needs a few extra days with her family,

which would be very understandable,

given the tragedy that's befallen her.

Hey.

Oh, hey.

No CeeCee today?

No, but it's nice when you're disappointed it's just me.

I am always happy to see you.

But happier when I bring your granddaughter.

I'm not gonna lie in church, so yes.

I brought you some canned goods for the food drive.

That is very thoughtful.

Well, you haven't seen the expiration dates.

Mary, did you order the... Oh.

Hey there, Mandy.

Didn't know we had a celebrity in our midst.

Oh, please, it's just the local news.

Well, let's not forget the biggest celebrity of all.

He's here, too.

Amen to that.

Okay, I'm gonna go.

I don't know if Mary

told you about the church carnival we have coming up?

It's a pretty big deal,

some might even call it newsworthy.

Oh, well, me and Georgie will try to stop by.

Oh, I think what

Pastor Jeff is trying to say

is that it could be really helpful if you were to

run it by your bosses...

Please put it on the news.

That.

All the money goes to charity,

and we could really use the publicity.

Well, we do cover that sort of thing, so I'll check.

And, if you do,

maybe you could wear something a little more modest than usual.

Don't blow this.

Just sometimes she shows too much bosom.

If her boss is okay with it, we should be, too.

What about our boss?

Jesus hung out with prostitutes. He's fine.

It's a win-win.

Church gets some publicity for their charity thing

and I get extra air time.

So you'll cover the Baptist church

but not the Catholic church.

Hey, I would cover a cult if it got me on TV more.

Well, then, you're off to a good start.

Well, church carnival's actually pretty fun.

There's booths and games, Pastor Jeff in a dunk tank.

You know, I had my first kiss

at a church carnival kissing booth.

You paid for your first kiss? That's sad.

It was a thing people did, it wasn't weird.

Yeah, she was my Sunday school teacher.

Okay, it was weird.

Maybe the shop should sponsor a booth.

I mean a game, not a creepy one like his.

His was a game: herpes roulette.

I'm thinking like throw a football through a tire

and win a free oil change.

You sure?

This is Texas, a lot of people can throw a football.

I can't.

No, son, you really can't.

I can teach him.

No, son, you really can't.

So, what you think?

It's a great idea.

- Really? - Yeah

Advertising, build some goodwill with the community.

Huh. You don't usually agree with me.

Well, you don't usually have good ideas.

Are you messing with me?

No, I think this is smart.

Are you doing reverse psychology?

No.

Are you doing reverse psychology?

I don't think so.

So what's happening, are we doing the booth or not?

I'm not sure anymore.

Okay, so they're gonna go live to us in about 20 minutes.

Just keep it casual

and look at me, not at the camera.

You don't need to explain it to me,

I'm also in the news business.

The good news business.

Funny.

I got more like that.

Can't wait.

So, uh, any questions?

Yes. Does that blouse have one more button

or is that all the way up?

You're blowing it again.

Pretty as a picture.

You know, you're looking a little shiny.

Do you want me to powder you?

I have my own makeup, thank you.

Damn it.

Church carnival. "Dang its" only please.

Hey, how's it going?

Great, no winners so far,

but I'm handing out a lot of business cards.

I guess everyone can't throw a football.

I rigged it.

The ball's extra heavy and the tire's extra small.

What, you're cheating at a church carnival?

How are you your mother's son?

I think it skips a generation.

Also,

what if when you're interviewing Pastor Jeff,

our booth is in the background?

So Mandy McAllister's

is standing in front of the McAllister Tire booth?

Yeah.

And maybe take it down a button.

Okay, you and your mother need to think less about my cleavage.

The pet python was finally found in the bathroom

at the local park,

so just remember, look before you leak.

And if you're looking for something fun to do

with the family this weekend, our very own Mandy McAllister

has a suggestion. Mandy?

Thank you, Kimberly.

So, I'm here with Pastor Jeff Difford

at the First Baptist Church carnival

where the funnel cakes are hot, the booths are hopping,

and all the money goes to charity.

Pastor Jeff, give us the details.

Well, the devil's in the details,

but I'll give you the scoop.

- Just a little church humor. - Mm-hmm.

You did warn me.

We'll be out here all weekend raising money

for the food bank. It's gonna be full of

good old-fashioned wholesome fun.

Sack races, egg toss...

You might even get a chance to sink yours truly

in the dunk tank.

Oh, well, that is tempting.

And it's gonna be a beautiful day for it.

I've predicted sunny skies all through Monday.

Guess we've got Him to thank for that.

Or Her.

Oh, I meant God.

No, I know, so did I.

But God's a man.

Yeah, could be a woman.

"Our Father who art in heaven."

Sounds like a man.

Fair point, although, "created all life"

sounds like a woman.

Well, He's not.

I'm just saying, we don't know.

You may not, but I do.

Well, one thing we can agree on,

the carnival's open from noon till 9:00 Saturday and Sunday,

so come on down.

For Channel Seven, I'm Mandy McAllister.

He's a man.

And we're clear.

Okay. Well, that was fun.

What?

Look, I know your mom's upset,

but other than her and Pastor Jeff,

I promise, no one cares.

So God's a woman?

See?

Come on, it's not that big a deal.

It is a huge deal.

Dad, you get I didn't say anything bad?

Still shouldn't have said it.

Oh, my God.

Maybe cool it with the "G" word for a while.

It's not like I said

God doesn't exist, because I think She does.

Not funny. I have to live in this town.

I have a hair appointment tomorrow.

That is three hours of dirty looks

and "bless your hearts."

You're overreacting.

There's three things you don't talk about in Texas:

Religion, politics and money.

What about sex?

Four things.

Well, maybe it's time we start talking about them.

Bless your heart.

Uh-huh. Yeah. Uh-huh.

Well, I can assure you,

her views do not reflect those of the station

and we will take care of it.

I don't think we stone people anymore.

Thanks for calling. Goodbye, Reverend.

Let me guess, another fan?

It's not a joke, folks are really upset. Listen.

Tell that blaspheming bimbo

she can do her next weather report from hell.

Well, that's silly. It's gonna be hot there.

Maybe we should pull you off the schedule for a while,

- let everybody cool down. - No, no, no,

don't take me off the air.

I can fix this. I'll just apologize.

Really?

Yeah. Why are you surprised?

'Cause as long as I've known you,

I've never heard you apologize for anything.

And I am so sorry for that...

I heard it, I'll practice.

And before we go to commercial, our Channel Seven weather girl,

Mandy McAllister, has a special message for our audience.

Mandy.

Thanks, Kimberly.

I just wanted to address some comments

I made on air yesterday.

I meant no disrespect, but I understand

if some of you were offended,

so, from the bottom of my heart,

I'm sorry you took it the wrong way.

Personally, I thought it was a compliment.

I think women are great

and God would be so lucky to be one.

But this is Texas,

so I should've kept my mouth shut.

Back to you, Kimberly.

Okey dokey.

And while we go to commercial,

how about we all pray for Mandy.

Suspended. Can you believe it?

Oh, I got suspended a ton of times.

It ain't bad.

Sit at home, watch TV,

hit your dad's liquor cabinet.

Okay, this isn't high school, Georgie.

I could lose my job.

You ain't gonna lose nothing.

You just got to let this blow over.

Somebody'll grow the world's biggest pumpkin

and they'll forget all about you.

I really don't think so.

You see how huge some of them pumpkins get?

You could live in 'em.

Do you think what I said was so wrong?

I don't know,

I guess I never really thought about it.

Why would you? You're a man.

Hey, if God's a woman, I'm cool with it.

You really feel that way?

Yeah.

Wow, I wish everybody was as open-minded as you.

I mean, if you think about it, plagues, floods...

that kind of temper sounds like a woman to me.

I bet that's the look God gives right before She smites folks.

- Hey. - Hey, honey. Everything okay?

Not really. Mandy got suspended.

I heard, I'm sorry.

Are you?

Of course.

She's my daughter-in-law and I love her.

But she said what she said.

Then she tried to undo what she said and she said more.

She was only at that carnival 'cause y'all asked.

I didn't ask her to mock God.

She said she's sorry.

That I took it the wrong way, I heard.

That ain't what she meant.

Georgie, what do you want me to do?

I can't help that people are mad.

Maybe Pastor Jeff can say something in his sermon.

You know, love the sinner, judge not lest you be judged,

give Mandy a break 'cause her husband's drowning in debt.

I will talk to him,

but he is mighty peeved.

Yeah, but he listens to you, so you can de-peeve him.

"De-peeve him?"

Un-peeve him?

No, it's "de-peeve."

What you reading?

Another batch of hate mail.

Joke's on you, "Satan Barbie" sounds cool.

May I?

Oh, yeah, knock yourself out.

So, the bad ones go here

and the really bad ones go here.

What's that pile?

You don't want to know.

I thought at least one person would be on my side.

Now, hold on.

I think this one...

No. Whoa. Yeah, no.

- Hey. Where you been? - Church.

Congratulations,

you knocked a pregnant teenager off the top of the prayer list.

Someone's the belle of the ball.

Why were you at church?

I was hoping I could get Pastor Jeff to say something

in his sermon to calm everyone down.

Is he gonna?

- He will. - Great.

If you sit down with him

on air and publicly apologize.

Oh, no. I will not be extorted.

Okay. Well, I tried.

I'll do it. I'll do it. Hey! Hey, I'll do it!

Shouldn't you be working?

On what? We've barely had any customers

since your wife made God mad.

There's a car up on the lift.

Yeah, mine.

Figure I'd change the shocks on what may be my new home.

She's gonna fix this and everything'll be back to normal.

Doesn't help that her name is on the store.

So we'll change the name to Cooper.

Why not Alvarez?

Cooper's got two "O" s.

We can make 'em look like tires.

I want to argue with that but it's good.

I thought Mandy threw those letters away.

She did.

You took 'em out of the trash?

I tried not to.

I failed.

What is wrong with people?

They don't have to agree with her,

but there's no reason to tear her apart.

You know, we got one of them AOL discs in the mail the other day.

What about it?

I have a feeling this whole World Wide Web thing

is gonna bring us all together.

Make people kind.

Can't happen soon enough.

People all over the world talking to each other.

I don't see the downside.

- Hey. - Hey.

You're not reading more of them letters are you?

Oh, my mom found this one in the pile,

it's from a little girl.

They can be mean. Don't take it personal.

No, she thanked me for what I said.

She called me an inspiration.

She didn't spell it right, but it still counts.

I-N-S-P-I-R-A-T-I-O-N?

Yes.

Take that, Sheldon.

Anyway, it got me thinking about CeeCee

and the kind of example I'm setting.

What do you mean?

Being a hypocrite just to keep my job.

Everybody does that.

Besides, she's gonna

grow up with a famous news lady for a mom.

That's a good example.

I guess.

Oh, come on, great job, beautiful kid,

young trophy husband.

You've got it all.

Trophy husband, huh?

You've seen me with my shirt off.

Pastor Jeff, thank you again for doing this.

Happy to be an example of Christian forgiveness.

Get that all out now.

I was just stretching my eyes.

Okay, we're back

in five, four...

Hi, Mandy McAllister again.

Don't change the channel.

I know I upset a lot of people,

and I realized that instead of talking more,

I should listen.

Which is why I have Pastor Jeff from First Baptist here with me.

Can I just say,

I am so sorry that I offended you.

Thank you.

And I understand you've been getting a lot of hate mail,

so I would like to remind my Christian community

that is not how Jesus teaches us to behave.

We don't write nasty letters about our neighbors.

We write them about The Simpsons.

And thanks to our campaign...

Why's she staring like that?

I think she's trying not to roll her eyes.

Well, I'm so glad we could put this behind us.

I think what ruffled the feathers of my flock

was that your comment seemed disrespectful of God.

Mm-hmm. We good?

And frankly a little ignorant of the scripture.

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only son."

Okay, you know what?

I can't do this.

Sure you can. Keep going.

I didn't mean to offend you, and I am sorry for that,

but I'm not sorry for what I said.

I don't want my daughter or any other little girl

thinking that they need to apologize for having an opinion.

So if that's what it takes for me to keep this job then...

I quit.

What did she do?

What did I do?