Original subtitles

I thought I was going away for a week to help somebody.

I'll come back and live my life again the way I had been living it.

I just feel I can't say no to people.

I never, ever imagined that that would be the last night of freedom in my whole

life. Where are you taking me?

Just an unbelievable feeling I've never felt before.

I really knew.

I'm not going home tomorrow, I'm in deep trouble I

met

Olu in London through a friend of mine.

He came from Nigeria.

I really felt for him.

We got married in the year 2000.

I was really happy.

I always felt secure about myself.

I always felt really blessed because I had everything I think anybody would

really want in their life.

And I had a husband who was amazing.

He was always encouraging me, always...

making sure I got everything I needed. He was always by my side.

And then he took me to Nigeria and I was like, wow, this is a dream come true.

I cried when I got there because it's so amazing.

And something about it I love.

I love the culture, I love the language, the scene, the dance. It was just so

much fun in Nigeria.

But then we met a guy called Tony.

Working in a market in a stall.

Where are you from?

He was just a very friendly person and very helpful.

And bubbly.

Always be happy.

He'd always be cheerful.

You know, he practically became family to us.

It was just amazing how close we all grew together in that short time.

He was somebody really special to us.

I trusted him with my life.

I only had a visa for three months.

So we left Nigeria to come back to London.

Tony had a wife in London waiting for him, along with his two children.

And he had to make it there to be the father that he always wanted to be.

We did an invitation visa for him on our names.

And he came to London.

He came to London and stayed with us.

Everybody was so pleased to see him. It was really a happy time.

His children I love very, very much.

They were always with Tony.

So they were practically always in our house.

And they were great. They were like my own.

But then...

Tony starts to change.

His character changed.

His way of dressing changed.

He had no money, he had no job.

He'd start going out a lot, buying all flashy clothes and shoes.

You wouldn't see him for three or four days.

And his wife would be calling wondering where he is.

Yo, man.

Hey, big man.

He started mixing with the wrong people and started doing things he wasn't

supposed to be doing.

I kept thinking he was into fraud because of the type of people he was

Eventually we had to speak to him about it.

Tony, Tony, look at me. Look at me now.

We'd had many arguments with Tony, my husband and I.

This is how you treat me? I would ask him, Tony, is everything okay? What's

going on, you know? Why aren't you spending time with your children

And he would just get, oh, I'm sorry.

I'm trying to get a home. I'm trying to build my life for my wife and me to be

together.

You know, it was always story after story after story.

I was very naive about Tony.

Very, very naive.

Olu asked him to leave the house at times he wouldn't leave. When we asked

we'd give him more chances and more chances.

And he just never would listen at that time. But then one day he just packed up

and left.

I felt sad because...

The disappointment that he'd given us, that really hurt me a lot.

I honestly thought we would see him either just gone and come back a few

later or a few days and days pass, weeks pass, months pass.

Hello? And all of a sudden we got a phone call from Tony.

Tony, where are you?

He told us how he's in South America, living in Ecuador.

He was complaining.

I have no money.

He had nowhere to live.

He kept speaking about his children, that they were the only things he wanted

this world.

He made us feel that he really wanted to get his family and his life back

together. I know I don't deserve this. Can you send money so I can get a visa?

He wanted to come back to London. He was like, always, always, always begging

of, please help me, I need to get back.

And I did.

I sent all my documents, photocopies of...

passports, birth certificates, mortgage certificates, references.

Tony had received everything, and he went to the embassy with it. They didn't

want copies. They wanted the originals.

And to send all my original documents over to Tony, I don't think I could have

done that, because maybe I wouldn't see them again.

So it came to a point where they asked me, would I be the one to go out to

Ecuador?

and help Tony come home.

He's trying to take advantage of you. He's not taking advantage of me.

My husband and I, we actually argued over it.

Ola would just say, you know what, Zoe, do what you want.

Do what you want. If you want to waste your money, I'm going to waste your

money. You can't trust this guy.

I just feel I can't say no to people.

You know, I just can't do it.

It's just not in me.

So that was the decision.

I will go.

I will do it.

At first I didn't realize it, but I think Tony was playing games with me,

with my emotions and the type of heart that I had.

I left for Ecuador on the 14th of February 2003.

I'm sure you have your passport.

Yeah, I've got it. I've got everything.

And that was today.

It's supposed to be a love day, isn't it? It wasn't so much love.

Leaving for the trip, I had to bring a lot of documents with me. I have 62 bits

of paper.

Call me if you don't get that.

Olu gave me a Valentine's Day present.

Gave me a white teddy bear.

I love it.

I never imagined that that teddy bear would be my comfort and something I held

on to so tight when I was in pain.

It was unbelievable.

That's why I was gone away for a week, to help somebody come back home to their

children.

I'll come back and live my life again the way I have been living it.

If I had any wish in the whole wide world, I think my only wish would be

I could rewind time, that I never got onto the airplane at London airport to

to Ecuador.

It was like the worst mistake of my whole life.

When I landed at Quito Airport, I was excited.

I knew I was in a different country. It just felt totally strange, and everybody

around me had long black hair and dark skin.

You know, it was really different.

I felt, wow, you know, I want to see Tony again.

I'm going to do something for him. He's going to probably come home with me.

There was no sign of Tony at the airport.

I was disappointed in him. I was let down.

I started thinking, you know what?

Was this worth it? Is Tony serious?

He should have been there for me.

I flew all this way just for him.

I ended up making calls back home.

Hi, I'm here.

My husband rang Tony to ask him, you know, where are you?

Okay, um, rice.

Anyway, he gave me directions to go to a hotel.

I just wanted to get this sorted out. I wanted to see Tony, you know.

That was what I came for.

I called Tony two or three times.

He said he'd be there late that night.

He was telling me, just relax, he's on his way, he's on his way.

And I was getting late and I was kind of looking out the window and everything

was really strange for me.

When he came, it was like, it was after 12 at night, he was dressed floppy and

draggy and not how he used to be always, very clean, very respectful.

He shook my hand.

You know, we never shake hands.

That's not how we say hi to each other.

We usually see me and hug me and, you know, we'd be really, oh my God, how's

everything, what's happening?

Do you want a drink?

No, no, no, that's okay.

He couldn't even look at me.

He wasn't relaxed, he wasn't settled.

He was on edge.

It's great to be here.

He didn't even ask me how people were.

There was none of that.

You know, it was just a really cold, cold relationship between us that time.

The following day, Tony suggested that we should go to this big tourist market

that is, like, really well -known in Quito.

I was a bit upset of going to the market because I didn't come to go to a

market. I came here to get things sorted out for you.

And he said, oh, the embassy is not open. It's only open certain days a

Then it was only open certain hours.

He said, no, don't worry. Things will be fine.

When I got there, I found out Tony had a girlfriend.

And it was like a big shock to me.

Tony was planning on coming home to his wife.

Tony was planning on getting his life back together.

So where did this girlfriend thing come in? It was like, what is going on?

She wasn't somebody I expected him to be with.

She was, like, dressed all, like, real cheap -looking and everything.

So I didn't really respect her from the minute I'd seen her.

We spent probably three hours in the market.

I got presents for everybody.

I was just picking up everything, you know, smiling.

It was actually really fun.

I bought so many things.

Statues and ornaments made from wood, hand -carved.

We had a lot of bags.

So Tony went over to a stall where they sell handbags, bags, suitcases,

rucksacks. Okay, you go and get a taxi, and I'll buy it back so that I can go

shopping, okay? All right.

All right?

And we waited. We stood there waiting where the taxis are at the end of the

market, and he came back with two rucksacks.

And he says, you can use these to put all your stuff in. And that was it.

We just went and got the taxi, and I accepted. I said, okay, that's cool.

you.

We were going to go get something to eat.

But Tony couldn't come.

So he dropped us off.

And he said, give me a few minutes. I'll be back.

And as we were getting out, I went to open the booth, take all the bags.

Don't worry about the shop.

I don't make any friends with carrying the bags around.

And Tony said, no, don't worry. Leave all your shopping there. That's okay.

I'll be ten minutes. I have to see a friend.

Okay? I'll be to the hotel.

And that was it. Left me with his girlfriend.

We didn't have much of a conversation.

Tony would ring her.

She'd be speaking to Tony. She'd say, oh, Tony, and she passed the phone to me

once.

Hello?

And he said he'd be over to drop my things over to me in the morning time.

On the fourth day, I was expecting Tony to be over.

We were supposed to go to the embassy.

All of a sudden, his girlfriend showed up and gave me my bag.

She left all my stuff with me. It was actually in the rucksack by now, all my

presents.

I said, OK, thanks, but where's Tony?

His mobile number. I've been trying to call him. I can't get through to him on

his phone. Can I have your phone number, please, to speak to him?

And she said, no.

You start speaking Spanish.

I knew she was just talking rubbish.

You know, this girl, you can understand her if you really want to understand

her.

That was it. She left. She left the hotel and left me there.

Imagine, I'm in a foreign country.

I can't even get through to the person I came to see.

The whole thing was just gone.

It's horrible.

I just didn't understand his whole life. Everything about him was a lie.

Everything.

I didn't want to ever see Tony again in my life. That was it.

The last night I spent in Quito, I wasn't happy at all. I actually cried a

And I just wanted to get the hell out of Ecuador and go home.

I never ever imagined that that would be the last night of freedom in my whole

life.

Thanks for helping me.

Next morning I got ready and headed off to the airport as normal as can be.

And I felt a bit sad and depressed because just looking at all of Quito,

lovely place, I didn't get to see anything.

And we passed the embassies.

It's like right behind the hotel where I was staying. It was like unbelievable.

And I was looking and I was just, I felt so disappointed.

I got to the airport and expected my flight in two hours after the time I got

there.

Everything was fine, no problem.

Before I actually checked in, we were in a queue.

And there was a man in an undercover car, I think.

He said, how long have I been in Quito?

I showed him my passport.

Okay.

Why did you come to Quito?

Just visiting a friend.

And he asked me, where are you traveling to? I told him London.

Back to London?

He said, okay, no problem. Have a safe journey.

Have a nice flight.

Thanks.

I checked in my bag, my suitcase, and I checked in the rucksack that

I had been given with my souvenirs in it from Tony.

I've got two to go in and I've got one hand up.

Everything was fine and they told me to go upstairs.

I got a drink and a sandwich.

I just wanted to be home.

not looking forward to the 11 -hour flight that was ahead of me.

I was sitting there, I finished my orange juice, my sandwich, everything,

looking around, just listening to the different language and just curious of

everything.

There was a girl there, one blonde girl, and she kept talking to me.

You know, and asking me questions like, where are you going? Have you got

someone to collect you at the airport?

My husband, he'll be there. Oh, your husband.

Which is something I found really strange. Later on, I thought about it.

Eventually, they called our flight number, so we all had to go and board

flight.

I walked onto the plane, I showed my seat number and the ticket.

I was on like the fourth or the fifth row.

And I went to sit down.

And all of a sudden from the back, all these policemen ran in and

they were shouting this name.

My name, I knew it was my name.

You know, I put up my hand. I said, here I am.

And they all came and they grabbed me. And they said, where's your

hand luggage? And I showed them where my hand luggage was.

They took it down.

They asked me, like in the small English that they could speak, if they could

search my bag. And I said, no problem.

What's the matter? What's wrong? I kept saying to him.

And he wouldn't answer me.

They were very intimidating.

Like the way they were all looking at me and pulling at me. One pulled me one

way, the other one pulled me the other way.

When the police took me off, I was feeling nervous. I could feel my

getting worse.

I go starting to take deep, deep breaths.

They asked me to come down to where they load the baggage onto the airplane.

What's the problem?

Where are we going?

Where are you taking me?

I was thinking, oh my God, why are these dogs all over me?

Smelling me, barking at my bag like crazy.

I kept saying, your bag, your bag, your bag. I said, yeah, that's my bag.

They asked me if they could search and I said, no problem.

I knew what they were looking for.

It's automatically, I just knew.

They're taking out of the bag. Yeah, this is my bag, yes.

And if they're taking everything out of the bag and unloading them and

everything, like police everywhere.

It was crazy atmosphere.

It was unbelievable.

And I kept telling them, my flight's leaving, my flight's leaving. But it's

nobody understood me. They were all just looking, no, no, no, no. They all kept

saying to me.

They searched the bag.

And they found nothing. There was nothing in the bag.

And they had a knife.

And they started poking knives all over my bag.

And they stuck it right into the end of the bag.

When they pulled it out, there was just white powder all over the knife.

Just an unbelievable feeling that I've never felt in my life before.

It just all fell into place, didn't it?

Tony, that's all I could see was Tony.

I think went, and I just fell.

I collapsed.

That was the last thing I remember.

When I woke up, I was in this room just lying on a metal bed. It was all police

there.

I just looked up at everybody.

I just started crying. There was nothing else I could do. Please, can someone

listen to me?

When they found the drugs, they were in the base of my bag, the bottom.

The smell that I was smelling all the time in the hotel and what Tony was

talking about was the glue.

The lining of the bag was full of drugs.

Two squares.

They were separated.

Took one out.

And then they took another one out.

The drugs, they're not mine.

Please. Can somebody just speak English to me, please?

And I used to see all the aeroplanes.

I remember... I remember looking at the airplanes

all the time, just wishing to be on them.

And then the policeman came and took me out and took me to a question room.

And they were just all asking me to sign a paper.

I wouldn't sign it because I didn't understand what nobody was saying and it

wasn't Spanish.

¿Cuánto tiempo más tengo que esperar?

¡Ah!

¡Ay, firma!

¡No, I'm not signing it! ¡Firma! ¡Que firmes!

¡Firma tu declaración!

¡No entiendes que tienes que firmar!

¡Ah!

A ver.

Late to do one guy that spoke English.

He spoke enough to explain to me what was going on.

The paper was a confession to admitting that I've been trafficking the drugs.

You need to sign this now.

He told me I have to sign that paper. If I don't sign that paper, I'm just going

to get a longer time in prison.

I'm not going to prison.

I'm not going to prison.

You will.

It must talk about...

20 hours, 22 hours, before I actually agreed to sign the paper.

They put me in a room where they saw men.

And it was horrible.

I always remember and think of everything that Olu used to say, and I'd

about it because I'd say, if I only listened, if I only thought about what

said, I wouldn't be where I am right now.

My husband meant so much to me. I loved him so much. He was everything to me.

There was nobody in the world like him.

And I kept thinking maybe I would lose him.

What's he going to do without me?

Is he going to be okay?

You know, those thoughts kept going through my head.

I had to stay there for nights upon nights, and nobody came to see me. I had

one to speak to. They wouldn't let me make a phone call.

I kept saying, Irish Embassy.

And they said, no, no embassy, no embassy.

Eventually I got a phone call.

I paid a doctor.

to use his mobile phone.

And I rang my husband.

Zoe, where are you?

And he just started crying.

We thought you were dead and everyone was thinking what happened.

I'm sorry, I've not been able to call. They've not given me a phone call.

And I only got a few minutes. I couldn't talk. I said, contact the embassy, do

something quick.

It's a horrible, horrible experience for both of us.

It took about two weeks and a half for somebody to come and see me.

And that was my conflict.

My husband eventually got in touch with them and let them know what was going

on.

And I jumped up. I was like, wow.

And I walked out. He was there.

I just hoped him so much.

I couldn't let him go, you know.

And I said, please take me home. You know, I just kept asking him to take me

home all the time.

Because I've signed the document, which I never should have signed.

I told him why I've signed the document, because of what the policeman said to

me. And I was just scared.

I don't know. So I had two charges up against me.

Possession and trafficking.

He explained how he's seen people in these situations before.

Everybody believes they're going to go free, but it doesn't happen like that.

And when he left that day, I really knew I'm in trouble.

I'm not going home tomorrow. I'm in deep trouble.

Panic you feel inside, the stress, the pain, like anger.

You know, each day waiting just for something to happen.

I needed a shower and I asked them, please, I need to take a proper shower.

there any other shower I can use?

And they said, yeah, you can use the police shower.

It was cold water, which I was horrible. I wasn't in China, but at the same time

I was.

It was like the water was running down my back.

And these two policemen came in.

And he started touching me.

And I kept screaming.

And I asked him to go away from me and leave me alone. He wouldn't leave me

alone.

I was holding myself in a corner trying to push them away.

I pushed him and I slapped one of them in the face.

I screamed again. I really screamed. I started kicking everywhere.

And I grabbed the towel and covered myself.

And they just ran. They just walked away. They didn't do anything to me.

They just left me alone then.

And I refused to let these people bring me down.

I refused.

I refused.

I got a friend.

That drive to the prison was the worst drive I've ever had in my life.

I used to miss being black gay.

And I just pictured myself behind him.

And they opened the gate. They banged on in and let me in.

The guards were carrying my bags.

And they brought me inside.

It was terrifying.

I could hear screams.

I could hear women shouting.

So they put me into a little room.

You know, it was really horrible.

And I got inside and the guard helped me because I wouldn't let go of my Bible

and my teddy.

Yeah,

I knew I was in prison.

I knew that this was it.

It's about to start.

My first night in prison was horrible.

I didn't even sleep.

It was freezing. I remember the girls sending the guards down to me with

blankets for me to put over me and pillows and socks and warm tracksuits.

They really took care of me that night.

I put my hand out and one girl took my hand and she was my best friend there.

It's a new world, a totally different world.

You create your own world there. The world outside doesn't exist anymore.

Drugs was like buying a candy in the store. You could buy it everywhere and

type you wanted. It was just there.

The guards, the police on the roof, selling drugs.

Drug addicts there.

Trying to steal you, cutting you up.

I've been cut up three or four times with knives for a dollar.

Everybody was convinced because I'm a foreigner you have lots of money.

You know, they don't realize I've just lost nearly everything I've worked for.

My lawyer brought me a telephone, a cell phone.

So my husband had a phone number to contact me on.

Hello Zoe, how are you today?

Oliver, he would bring me crying like a baby every single day, you know. He was

trying to make me strong, but he was really not strong either.

I can't take this. And his mother died the same month that I was arrested, so

he'd lost two people. And then his father died five months later.

So he lost everybody.

I used to tell him that, don't worry, I'm home. The lawyer told me today that

everything's OK.

Don't worry, I'll be home. Probably my court case will be next week. I'm going

to see you again really, really soon.

He was somebody that gave me hope of coming home.

And I knew I had something to come home to.

The waiting for my sentence was really hard.

Then one day, one of the girls helped me make a call to...

My translator.

And we rang him.

And I knew it was bad news the minute she just looked at me.

What did they say?

What is that?

And she came off the payphone and she said to me,

you've been sentenced.

She said, eight years.

I screamed.

I just screamed. So much came out of me. It was unbelievable.

The

day I got

sentenced, the day I heard about my sentence, destroyed me.

It took away everything I had. My friends, my smile, my heart.

My faith, my soul, everything just ripped me apart.

I just didn't want anybody.

I just told all my friends to get out of my room.

And I just felt nobody was there for me. God is not even there for me. Where is

my God, you know?

Tony, he didn't just destroy my life. He destroyed my whole family's life, my

relationships, my spirit, my soul, everything.

He destroyed everything.

I wanted to speak to Olu so badly.

And I rang him and I told him. He just hung up the phone.

He couldn't talk to me.

And I needed him so much.

I couldn't deal with it. I just got depressed.

Highly, highly, highly depressed.

It was like two months, three months actually later.

Olu was ringing me and telling me, I'm coming, you know, I'm coming to see you.

What would you do if I came to see you?

I thought he was just joking.

I just ignored it.

Then one night morning I got a phone call. It was visiting day.

And at 8 o 'clock in the morning my cell phone was vibrating. I picked it up

with an Ecuadorian number.

And it was him.

He was in Ecuador, you know.

I was like, oh, my God, what?

All right, I can't see you two.

Bye. I couldn't believe that. I was shocked.

He said, I'll be there in 20 minutes in a taxi.

Then I got all excited and I was telling my friends, oh, my God, Olu's here. Oh,

my God, he's here, he's here.

And it was true, the gate's open for a visit now, and he walks straight

He just walks straight through the gate.

I

ran,

ran all the way down to him.

And we just followed in each other, it was so lovely.

It was a really lovely feeling to have him next to me.

He kept saying how strong I am, how amazing I am.

He felt like this was somebody who really loved me.

When Olu came, I just got really desperate. I wanted to leave with him.

I wanted to be home with him. I wanted to be beside him.

He was everything to me and all I really had left.

And we met a new lawyer.

And he said, the only way to get her out now is escape.

The only way.

And we said, how? He said, through the hospital. We can get her out from the

hospital.

I thought about it so much.

It was a decision we had to make that was very hard for both of us.

We said no about it, just yes, no, yes, no, constantly, every hour of the day to

decide, should we do it? Do you think this will help? Is this the right way to

go about things?

And we decided, yeah, let's do it.

The exact plan to escape was get out of the prison to a hospital.

The doctor would do that.

He'd sign me out of the prison pretending I was sick.

The liar had planned to take me from the hospital.

He would get me a false passport.

Run to the hospital, drive to Colombia, get a flight from Colombia to Amsterdam,

and then Amsterdam, London.

And I'd be home.

I got to the hospital.

I had to be in the hospital four days.

And yeah, it was time to do it.

I just couldn't do it.

I couldn't get out of bed.

Everything was ready. I was too scared.

I just hadn't got the courage.

I only stayed next door two weeks.

I remember the day he was leaving. It was a Sunday.

I just didn't want to let him go.

I had a choice.

You know, I had a choice to go to make my life, to work on this and build

better, or I had a choice to fall down.

But it was like an inner strength came upon me, and I just started growing

again.

I started writing, just writing. I just kept writing all my thoughts down, all

my feelings.

That's how I expressed myself. That's how I got all my pain out.

There was a new president.

The new president of Ecuador, Korea was his name. Amazing man.

He just changed the laws for everyone.

It was amazing how it happened. Nobody could believe it.

Nobody. It was just so quick, so fast, so sudden.

I rang Olu and he was over the moon. He just couldn't believe it either. He

says, yeah, yeah, okay.

He was really, really happy.

And they let me out Monday morning.

I was scared and I got dizzy.

And I got headaches from the traffic, just looking at so many, just everything

was different, you know.

I took out my shoes and I just lay on the grass.

I just wanted to feel the touch of air, you know, look up at the sky without

seeing bars, you know.

I'm free, you know, I can do what I want.

I was actually nervous and scared to go home.

I was going through crazy emotions, crazy, crazy emotions, you wouldn't

it.

They took me to the immigration in the airport.

I'm just sitting here now, my last day in Ecuador.

And I'm waiting to go home.

I'm going to cry.

And I have to stay here now until my flight leaves.

It's okay, no problem.

I'm fine.

To rebuild my life, it will take time.

It's going to take a lot of time because I have nothing at the moment.

I've lost everything that I've ever had.

Going back to Olu, life has taken us both in different directions.

As much as we love each other, I don't think we can live together, you know. It

was like really hard for us to be together.

I'm more emotional in many ways.

I can't accept things the way I used to.

I still have a lot of pain inside.

I just need to get my confidence back and I've lost it. That prison took it

away from me.

But I know I'll make it.

I know I'll do it.