All language subtitles for Laugh s01e04 The Wallet.eng

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Original subtitles

? Tubi

? Tubi

(dramatic music)

- [Narrator] To the max.

? Life ain't great

? Nigga, what you gon' do about it ?

? Shit ain't you, you just gotta move around ?

? Couple offsides

? Just have to climb, have to rise about it ?

? Couple offsides, just had to climb ?

? My life ain't great

? Nigga, what you gon' do about it ?

- Man.

I'm so glad today's Friday, bro.

- Bro,

I don't know how much longer I'm

gonna be able to work here, fam.

If you tell me your phone got water damage,

I'm expecting water.

It was like fruit loop milk

or something like that, bro!

- Like tapioca pudding or something?

- Right, it was nasty!

And it's that little boy.

When you see the snot and it's dry,

that mean it's been there for a while.

And he kept licking it, and the little silver teeth.

- Exactly, and you know they bite too?

- They mean they bite, little nibbler.

I need relaxation tonight, man.

We going to the spot.

I need bottles, I need freaks and booty cheeks.

- Bottles, freaks and booty cheeks!

- Bottles, freaks and booty cheeks!

- I want all that, bro.

- Yeah man.

I called Keisha, I called Tasha.

- Okay.

- And I told 'em to bring their little friend, man.

The little one with the,

boy, she got a crazy patio.

- They all hella thick, which one you talking about?

- No, no, no.

This one, she little.

Real pretty in the face.

Now legged, like a little sexy midget.

Bro, she crazy.

- Are you talking about Chanel?

- Chanel, what's who I'm talking about!

- Hella-hella yams galore.

- Yeah, bro.

She was crazy.

- It's crazy work, bro.

It look like a BBL but it ain't.

- Yeah, how you know?

You hit it?

- No, nigga.

My cousin went to middle school with her, man.

She had hella butt since back then.

- Oh yeah, I weren't tripping!

You know what I mean?

I don't make no damn sense, bro.

That thing is crazy.

I mean, damn,

it just don't make no sense.

- At all, bro.

- At all, bro.

All that ass, that height equilibrium should be off.

I ain't gonna hold you.

I'm gonna have to scoop her little thick ass up, bro,

just for my legacy.

- Yeah, right.

I should beat the brakes off your ass.

- No, no,

I ain't gonna blow a full blast like that.

I'm just plant the seed, you know what I mean?

Follow on the IG, like her pictures.

Nothing crazy.

Not the sexy pictures.

You like makeup tutorials, you like her eating food,

little bite of a sandwich,

her with her grandma on they birthday.

Something like, something light,

just to let her know I'm watching.

- Galvin, man,

you better stop taking all these

chances with these chicks, homie.

Matter of fact, how many times you had

your windshield repaired this year alone?

- Only like twice?

- Only like twice?

Nigga, it's February.

- Man, what you want me to do?

This ain't on me, bitches be crazy!

- No, nigga,

you just be stupid.

- You say I'm stupid, I say I'm living life adventurously.

- Okay.

Here you go with the bullshit, nigga.

- It's gonna be a good time, man.

(sensual music)

Oh, there goes your sunshine.

- Oh shit.

Gimme three minutes, bro.

- What are you doing?

- You believe in destiny?

- Only when I'm trying to avoid it.

- Come on, you can't curb me forever.

- It ain't forever if you stop trying.

- What if I never stop trying?

- I deal with you all day long.

Can you just go away?

- Damn, can I ask you a question?

- What?

- Lemme take you to the movies tonight.

- You think I'm gonna be in a dark ass

room with you for an hour plus?

- Yeah, why not?

- Denise is why not?

Yeah, didn't think I knew about that,

did you, and what you two were doing in the movies?

- Look, that was like six months ago,

and she don't even work here no more.

- Yeah, okay.

Whatever.

- And why you bringing up old shit?

That's stuck in the past.

Look, if you don't like chocolate milk,

you can just say something.

- Actually I love chocolate milk.

I just don't do lame.

- Lame, why I gotta be lame?

- That's something you should ask yourself.

I'm sure you'll figure it out though.

Now can you just move?

- Yeah, alright.

Still smell good though after work.

You're breaking my heart on some mint condition shit.

- One, two,

three strikes, he's outta air!

Vartrell loses the game again!

Throw in the towel!

- Shut your stupid ass up, man.

- He tried, bro.

- I'ma get her eventually.

- Alright, man.

You gotta keep doing your,

speaking of getting her, there she go.

- Was that Letty that just left?

- Yeah, she dipped.

- Damn, she left her wallet on her desk.

- Mhm, I guess you gotta drive your fine ass

over there and drop it off,

like I've been trying to drop something off in you.

- No, nigga.

I'm not driving all the way across town.

I got shit I gotta do.

- I'm shit, you could do me.

- I got shit, you could do me.

Shut the fuck up.

- Hey, I'll take it.

Or you can do it.

- Cool, because she probably gonna need it.

- Yes.

- Walk slow.

- Them jeans doing what they supposed to do too.

- She on top!

- Hella cabbage back there, boy.

- Man listen, so let me get this right.

I just wanna be clear.

You gonna drive all the way across

town in an enemy hood just to drop this

off to a woman who think you lame?

- She gonna think I'm lame and brave.

It's romantic, bro.

- Well, you know what?

Man, all the best of you brother.

I hope it all work out.

- It will.

- Just so we clear, I'm not going.

- You can't ride shotgun?

- Absolutely not, nope.

I got plans tonight.

You have fun, man.

- I'm gonna have a lot of fun.

- I got a whole life planned for me, my boy!

Yep, I'm gonna marry Tasha,

and then I'm gonna divorce her,

but I'm gonna get her pregnant so I can at least

hit for another couple years after that,

and then I'm gonna call Chanel.

I'm gonna have a little, little football team.

They gon' be low to the ground.

Tough!

? K Town touches, thick laces on my chuggs ?

? Tether ball swinging more than he does double dutch ?

? Pictures on the wall of the Playboy bunny backdrop ?

? Hollywood's ghetto, ain't what you thought it was ?

? Hit the homies like I got the win, what's up ?

? We headed to the sloss before that drip kill her ?

- Wait, when was the last time y'all went to Hong Kong?

- Last time I went there, man,

my dick burnt for a week.

- I don't even like Chinese food, homie.

- Nah?

Man, the Chinese food there is best I ever had,

dog, I swear to god.

- Something special, dog.

- Especially when they've got cold sores-

- Hey, hey,

hey, hey.

Y'all know that fool or not?

- Nah.

- [Himan] Nah?

- Yeah, we're here.

(tense music)

- Hey!

Fuck is up, homie?

You know where the fuck you at?

- I'm where I need to be, bro.

I'm just trying to return this wallet.

- Mm.

- You from over here?

- Nah.

- What the fuck I thought.

So what the fuck are you doing in my yard?

Hey, Sleeper.

Is there a backyard buggy we don't know about?

- Not that I heard about.

- That's what I thought.

- Look.

I'm just trying to talk to Letty, man.

- Fuck you gotta talk to Leticia for?

- That's between me and her.

- No the fuck it ain't.

Anything regarding Leticia is my concern.

- Hey, look bro.

I'm gonna talk to her real quick and I'm gonna dip, alright?

I don't know who you are to her, man-

- I'm everything to her, motherfucker.

So go back to the other side before somebody gets hurt.

- I didn't know she had a boyfriend-

- Motherfucker, are you deaf?

Walk the fuck outta here.

- Look man.

I'm gonna leave after I talked to Letty, alright?

- Now you done fucked up.

(tense music)

Now you can't leave.

- Alright bro, y'all got it.

I'ma dip.

- It's too late for that.

Take him to the back.

- Hey, hey,

chill, bro!

You ain't gotta do all that!

- I'm not asking, motherfucker.

Walk, bitch.

(tense music)

- Good boy.

(suspenseful music)

- Come on, fam.

Nah, dog,

I can't go in the garage, brothers!

- You going in the fucking garage, bro.

- Y'all about to kill me over some bullshit?

- Yeah.

- Fuck this chitchat, kill this motherfucker already.

- Nah, wait till it gets dark,

throw him in the van, then (speaking in Spanish).

- Mataloo?

What the fuck that mean, bro?

What are you talking about, man?

- You're about to find out.

? You're really from over there ?

? You ain't from the C- block, don't come over there ?

? They was chunking two fingers with their thumb in the air ?

? Kept my head on the swivel

? Nigga spun over there

- I keep telling y'all, man.

I'm not from nowhere, bruh!

- Bullshit.

Motherfucking lying, bro.

- Hey Sergio.

What's up with that acid connect, bro?

- Carlitos is pulling up with it right now.

- The fuck y'all doing with acid?

- You ever eaten anudo before?

Yeah buddy.

That's what we about to do to you, man.

- The fuck?

Look, bro,

I get it, y'all made your point.

Y'all not to be fucked with.

Let me just dip, man.

Y'all got me back here for 25,

30 minutes, man.

- That's the thing.

I told your ass to leave earlier,

but your stupid ass didn't want to listen.

- You right, you did.

I fucked up, I'll leave.

- You ain't talking your way out of this.

So you work there?

- Yeah, man.

I've been working there with Letty for years.

- Shut the fuck up!

- You just asked me a question, fam?

- I asked you one question.

All that other shit, I don't give a fuck about it.

This job, it's a part of the city we don't fuck with.

- I just work there, man.

That's it.

- So you don't live there?

- Huh?

- Huh, huh?

You can't hear?

Do you live there or do you not?

- I live over there, man-

- Then you're from over there, motherfucker.

- No I'm not, man!

Look, I'm from over there,

but I'm not from over there, you feel me?

- You're only not from over there

'cause you got these glocks to your dome.

- Pause, man.

- So this guy's a comedian now?

Fucking overgrown Dave Chappelle ass motherfucker-

- Ignacio!

What the are you doing?

Are you stupid?

- Ah!

Sophia, what the fuck?

You snitching?

- I'm not gonna let you kill someone back here.

- Letty, who the fuck is this?

- That's none of your fucking business.

- It is my business, this motherfucker ran up in my shit.

- This ain't your shit, none of this is your shit.

- It is my shit, I live here.

- Dead on.

- Himan, shut the fuck up and put your gun away.

What are you doing here?

- I came to bring you your wallet

and your man started tripping.

- Ew!

This is not my man.

This is my brother.

- Big brother.

- Yeah, y'all act like my little brothers.

Get your ass in the front.

- Letty, this one's from the other side of the tracks.

You know the rules.

- The rules don't apply to him, he don't even gangbang.

- How do you know?

Did you ask him where he's from?

- I know him, I've been working with him for years.

- Oh, so this is your boyfriend?

- What are you talking about?

- I mean, you must like him or something

if you're willing to save his life.

- I already told you, he's just my coworker.

It's not like that.

- The fuck is it like then?

This fool's coming to the crib and shit,

y'all must be doing something at work for him to do that.

- You are doing way too much right now.

I'm not answering your stupid ass questions.

- What the fuck you looking at?

- Look, you gotta calm down bro.

- The fuck you say to be?

- Nacho, stop!

- I know this lela's face.

He's the fucking ops.

- I already told you, he don't even gangbang.

He's just a square that works at my job.

- Oh, square?

I'm not-

- Vartrell, shut up!

- What, Vartrell?

The fuck is a Vartrell?

- First of all,

your name is a tortilla chip, bro.

- Oh yeah, what if I shoot you in the fucking face?

- Yo, both of y'all need to shut up.

Nacho, you ain't about to shoot shit.

Get your ass in the house.

- Nah, fuck that.

- So what the fuck was your plan, genius?

You were gonna shoot some guy in grandma's backyard?

- Maybe.

- And you Himan, what was your stupid ass plan?

You're already fighting a gun charge.

You're just gonna go back to prison

and share a cell with your brother?

Oh, that's right.

You're already sharing a room at grandma's house.

- Hey!

- Why you putting our business out

there in the streets like that?

The fuck?

- Yeah, what the fuck's your problem?

- So that's what y'all are worried about?

Being embarrassed?

How about you throwing your life away for this guy?

- Damn, why you say it like that?

I guess it's just "fuck me", huh?

- That's what I thought.

Get your ass in the house.

- I'm not going in the house.

I'll go in the front yard though.

Bitch.

- Don't let me catch you on the block.

(speaking in Spanish)

- Hey, Himan and Ignacio,

good to meet y'all.

- [Ignacio] Fuck you.

- So this is what you look like outside of work?

Dang.

- Why would you come here?

- I was trying to do the right thing.

- So what'd you do?

Take my wallet outta my purse?

- Damn.

You really don't fuck with me, huh?

- Because you just do too much, bro.

Who shows up to someone's house unannounced like that?

- Somebody that's trying to look out for you.

Looking out enough to bring your wallet.

- You're the last person I want bringing my wallet.

- It was either that or your wallet

stays in the office all weekend, no bread.

And for your information, I didn't take your wallet.

When you left the parking lot, April came down with it.

Matter of fact, she should have

been the one to bring it to you.

- That would've been cool.

- But she didn't.

Instead she was quick to give it to me

because she didn't want to come across the city.

- Well, thank you.

- You're welcome.

- Can I have my wallet back?

- For sure.

You know this could've went different though?

I could've took your wallet home

and you would've had to come to my crib and get it.

- Oh my God, you're so annoying.

- What, where you going?

What you doing?

- Why'd you have to go and fuck it up?

- What, then?

- Why'd you say that?

- Say what?

- You can't ever just be regular, can you?

- I'm regular, what did I say?

- You did a good thing and then

you turned it into some other shit.

- How?

- "You could have come to my house and get it."

- First of all, what's that?

- That's you.

- I don't sound like that.

- Look, stop deflecting.

We both know what you're doing.

- And what's that?

- I could have come to your house and get it?

- I don't know what you was thinking about,

but I'm talking about the wallet.

- Vartrell, just cut it out.

- See, I like the way you say my name.

- Oh God!

- Okay, alright.

My bad.

That's too flirtatious, my fault.

- You're a piece of work.

- If only you knew.

- Dude!

- Okay, damn,

shit, I'm sorry.

It's a bad habit.

- You think?

- Can we start over?

- Is that even possible?

- You told your brothers earlier that you knew me, right?

- From work.

- Right, from work,

which means you don't really, really know me.

- I know you enough.

- I know I play a lot.

- Too much.

- Maybe so.

But there's another side to me.

- And I wouldn't know that other side

because all you do is sex play somebody.

All the women at work know that

when they walk past your desk,

all you're gonna say is some sexual shit to them.

- Okay, I'll be playing most of the time.

- And that's the problem.

How do you expect to be taken

seriously if all you do is play?

- I hear what you're saying.

- Do you?

- I do.

I also feel like I was being serious

when I came over here to bring you your wallet.

- Again, thank you for bringing my wallet.

- That's what I'm talking about.

We went from "What are you doing here" to "thank you."

So does that mean I can take you out then?

- Vartrell, no.

- No?

Still after all this, still a no?

- Wait.

Did you do this out of the kindness of your heart

or is this just another tactic to ask me out?

- I'd be lying if I didn't say both.

I'm just being honest, alright?

Look, I brought you your wallet 'cause I know you needed it,

and I would want somebody to do the same for me.

And I came over here to give you

another chance of going out with me.

- Give me another chance?

- Yeah.

- How are you gonna give me another chance

when I'm the one saying no to you?

- Because you don't know no better.

- Oh, I don't know no better.

- Nah.

Because if you knew better, you'd do better.

- You just always got some slick shit to say.

Let me tell you something, Trell.

You ain't no pimp.

- I know, I know I'm not.

You know, I'm too wholesome of a brother for that.

I'm a good guy, but I'm a good time.

And you should probably take time to find out.

So what do you say?

- Mm...

I'll say I still pass.

- Alright.

Can't blame my brother for trying, right?

Again and again.

You got your wallet back.

Hope you have a good weekend.

Didn't think you could get

more beautiful though, that's crazy.

See you on Monday, Leticia.

- But...

You can walk me home.

- You already home?

- I don't actually live here, I live down the street.

I just get my mail sent here,

an excuse to see grandma every day.

- That's dope.

So you do got a soft side.

- Don't make it weird.

- I'm just saying, after meeting your brothers,

I know why you so mean.

Them dudes is angry as fuck!

- I'm not mean!

And my brothers are just stupid.

By the way, don't tell anybody

you almost died for me today.

- I won't.

As long as you don't tell nobody you smiled at me.

- Trust me, no one's gonna know about that.

- See what I'm saying about being mean?

- Boy, come on before I change my mind.

- Please lead the way.

- God!

You just have a way of making things sound wrong.

- What did I say now?

- "Please lead the way."

Like you're just trying to be nasty.

- How is that nasty?

- Everything outta your mouth just sounds freaky.

- Sounds like you're projecting.

- Sounds like you're in denial.

- Okay.

- And you're just walking me to my front door.

Don't think you're coming inside.

- Ain't nobody trying to come into your house.

You think I like something?

(dramatic music)

? Yeah

? You telling me to take off all your ropa ?

? 'Cause I'm flyer than the moska ?

? Baby, I'm what they taught you ?

? I just really want a chance to get to know you ?

? I'm making moves like Pablo

? Three quarters loca diablo

? So what you saying, talking shit ?

? Man leaving, looking like some clamato ?

? I keep quit, I won't move

? No merindo

? Till I'm dead and locked up by the gringo ?

? And when they come around, (speaking in Spanish) ?

? That's why I'm dripped up in Gucci and Prada ?

? Winners win

(dramatic music)

- [Narrator] To the max.

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0

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