Original subtitles

Oh, McDermott. I wanted to thank you for that introduction to those Texas

computer people.

I'm just doing my bit for the old country. How's the trade fair going?

Oh, first rate?

Sold $5 million worth of Shetland wool.

Well, you can count on the royal treatment as long as you're in the St.

Mr. Nordlake.

Well, I'm only a trade attache, Miss Frances, not a prince.

Though the family does go back to William the Conqueror.

I'm impressed. My family tree was chopped down around the potato famine.

Only the best families have descended from old William.

I'm afraid the rest of you will have to make do with Adam and Eve.

See you along.

They'll always be in England.

Even if half of it's in California.

Will you just relax? Look, this is the golden opportunity we've got an entire

weekend. This is all play, no work. Well, I guess I do need to get away from

rat race. Yes, and back into the human race. Can we at least eat first?

Ellen, do you realize you put away enough hamburgers to beat the NFL?

Metabolism. I burn it up.

You were saying about metabolism?

You're right, Donna. With guys like that around, maybe it is time for a new

biology lesson.

Thank you.

Cash, my sweet.

Bad news?

Oh, uh, a friend has delayed that, though.

I'm sure he'll be here soon.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Have a pleasant stay.

Now, there are two girls looking for a good time this weekend.

Like someone else I know.

Quit it, Megan.

Come on, Julie.

Tell me all about Mr.

X. Which one?

Which one?

Well, wait.

Everything okay for tonight, Julie?

Can't wait.

Errol, have you met Megan and Christine?

My pleasure.

Hi.

So, uh, 8 o 'clock, okay?

Dancing till dawn.

Where'd that one come from?

Silicon Valley.

He's here for the computer convention.

Not bad for 24 hours.

Think I need to go a little slower?

Too late.

Looks like you both already flipped into high gear.

Oh, no. Not tonight of all night.

Oh, I think it was the hamburgers at the airport.

The onions are dancing with the bacon in my stomach. Oh, you poor thing. Come

on, let's get you to bed. We'll just stay in tonight and watch TV.

No, no, you go out and have a good time. Don't blow your own weekend.

Without you, how could I?

Ellen, you've been a hermit since your divorce.

You need excitement, not a sick roomie.

You sure?

Come on, you can't be in mourning for a broken marriage forever.

I'm going to watch a blue movie on cable while you go out and find the real

thing.

Oh, there you go.

Oh, it's good to hear you laugh again.

Come on, let me see.

Let's get you to bed.

Very nice.

Now that's an outfit to go dancing in.

Harold loves the glitzy look. Says it reminds him of computer chips. Oh,

careful, Julie. With wrapping like that, he's going to want to look inside the

package.

Well, got time for a drink, Julie?

Sorry, Kaz.

No can do. Oh, I'm heartbroken.

But we're still on for tomorrow night.

Sushi. Wouldn't miss it for the world. Good.

You see, the gardens are beautiful in the moonlight.

Two guys?

At the same time?

Gotta go.

What can I do? The gardens are beautiful in the moonlight.

Gin and orange, please.

And refresh the lady's glass.

It's time for a change. I'll try one of those gins and orange. Gin and orange.

Two gin and orange coming up.

You are a very beautiful woman.

Well, thank you, kind sir.

No, really, I mean it.

I'm Tony Mortlake with the British Embassy.

You make that sound like a title.

Well, actually, my brother inherited the title.

I'm merely the honorable.

You're putting me on.

Well, fortunately, like Winston Churchill, who rejected every hereditary

England could offer, my ambitions are above mere titles.

And what's your ambition for this evening?

Merely to do what Her Majesty's government commands me to do.

Improve Anglo -American relations.

Cheers.

Cheers.

So those are basically the terms of your inheritance.

When he signs over the trust tomorrow, you'll be on your own.

I've been on my own all my life, Mr. Sullivan. Do I detect a trace of

bitterness? How could I ever be bitter about my mysterious benefactor?

But do you blame me for wanting to see him just once in almost 20 years?

Those were the terms under which he agreed to be your guardian, Miss

Miss Herrick?

My name's not my own.

Well, you know that your guardian chose it for you.

Come on.

You're not a child anymore.

Sorry, it's not your fault.

And you're right.

I'm not a child anymore.

Oh, excuse me. I'm sorry.

I wasn't looking.

You still have it.

What?

Well, I'll have to get you another one before that one fades.

I don't know if I should accept two roses from one man.

Sometimes one is enough.

When a man gives a woman flowers for no reason, he usually has one.

Good for you. Watch yourself here.

If flowers aren't appealing, how about dinner?

I'm afraid I wouldn't be very good company tonight, Mr... Shepard.

Zach Shepard.

My intentions are strictly honorable.

Now I'm insulted.

Is that the Crown Room at 8 o 'clock?

Just in on conversation?

Between such old friends, what else?

Okay. I'll be there.

How did you coax a smile out of that one?

Well, Sylvester, how are you, Counselor?

Fortunately, old age is always ten years older than I am.

I didn't expect you till tomorrow.

Well, I thought I'd arrive early to check out a sporty good company for

Already found an exquisite dinner companion.

Hard for an old rake to turn a new leaf.

What was that about coaxing a smile?

You don't know who she is?

Sure. She's the girl with my rose in her lapel.

Zack, you just made a date with Lisa Herrick.

Lisa Herrick.

You're Lisa Herrick.

That's the girl you've been taking care of.

I thought Englishmen were cool, calm, and collected.

How canod.

Don't believe all that stiff upper lip stuff.

Well, that one I believe.

You've got to be married, right?

Well, one must pass on the torch to one's children.

Do you?

My ex didn't want them.

Bad thought, was he?

Not really.

I guess he gave me a lot of things.

Except himself.

Well, now I'm really depressed.

No more gin and orange.

Well, perhaps I've got something better in my diplomatic pouch.

Your pouch hasn't been diplomatic all evening.

What do you say?

Shall we make this wicked world a better place in which to live?

I don't know. I thought we were just going to smoke some grass.

What's grass compared to Merlin's elixir of earth, wind, and fire?

Well, hey, only live once, right?

So I was raised in three different boarding schools and my affairs were

after by a man I've never met.

What about your parents?

Well, in the old days, I would have been called the result of an indiscretion.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to pry.

Oh, it's okay, really.

My mother died in a car accident shortly after I was born and my father was

killed in Vietnam.

And your guardian never told you their names?

He never even answered my letters.

Mr. Sullivan was always the intermediary.

I'm sure he wanted to write you.

But something else always came up.

A business meeting, a golf game.

You sound like you hate him.

I love him.

But you just said... I know he doesn't care about me.

But you see, he's all I've got, so I pretend he cares, and that's enough for

to love him.

I'm sure he cares a lot more than you know.

I'm an illegitimate child.

And all around, pain in the neck embarrassment.

But like I said, I pretend he cares.

Darling!

Where are you?

Moses Sturgeon? Hi, hi, little old girl.

Tell the doctor your pleasure.

I hope you're not sick.

Try not to make a mess in there, will you?

Want another hit?

I don't mind if I do.

Time for another magical mystery tour.

Ready or not, here come the Grenadines.

Get up.

Get up.

For God's sake, get up.

Inspector, do you really need Miss Myers to stay here?

It'll be just a few minutes.

I know this is painful, but I need to find out

about the marks on your friend's arm.

What?

What are you talking about?

A terrible thing.

I mean, we'd had a few drinks together, but it never occurred to me that she'd

been taking drugs.

Alan hasn't even smoked a joint since college.

Are you sure you didn't bring a little something to make the weekend more fun?

No.

We weren't like that.

Mr. Mortlake, do you mind if I take a look around your suite?

Whatever for?

Well, if Miss Lindstrom was injecting herself with drugs, there should be a

needle or a syringe around somewhere.

We couldn't find any of them in her room.

Well, I really don't think you'll find anything here to interest you,

I'd prefer you didn't touch that.

It's private correspondence.

Is that yours?

Of course it is.

Do you mind if I take a look?

I'm sorry, but those papers are confidential.

They're protected by diplomatic immunity.

Really?

Can you verify that?

Pardon me?

It looks in order.

You're the trade attache to the British consulate, right?

That is correct.

I hope that doesn't mean you're not going to cooperate with us.

Not at all, but I have no choice here.

Those papers are property of the British government.

But you will be around for a while.

Well, I shall be at the hotel until the trade fair ends.

Naturally, I shall place myself at your disposal.

Good morning.

Morning, Mr. Shepard. Oh, this is my friend whose flight was delayed, Tim

Fiedler. So glad you finally made it, Tim. So am I. Nice to meet you. I know

two want to be alone now, but why don't you join me for a drink later before

dinner? We really haven't... Oh, that would be lovely, wouldn't it?

My sweet, say seven o 'clock?

Perfect.

Thank you.

Since when do you go around picking up stray guys?

He's a very interesting man, and I didn't pick him up.

Well, he's a lot older than you are.

You should look so good when you're over 40.

Grow old with me, my love.

The best is yet to come.

It was a great presentation you did yesterday, Kev. Almost half of it made

sense. Well, I'm just glad I'm not going database this year. You won't be able

to steal my ideas for once.

Julie, you've got to choose between those guys.

Why? Because they know each other. They're bound to find out you're dating

of them. Thanks.

But they're both such sweethearts.

Julie, love is like a toothbrush.

Never share it with more than one guy at a time.

Look, I'm not saying he did anything.

I'm just saying we ought to look in that bag.

The trouble is, he's a guest.

We can't... Peter, Mr. Lindstrom's here. He flew up from Los Angeles. Mr.

Lindstrom, I'm Peter McDermott, general manager.

Please come in and sit down.

Thank you.

This is Mr. Griffin from security.

Can't tell you how sorry I am about your daughter, sir.

I'm glad you called me. We want to do everything we can to help.

May I arrange a room for you? I'd appreciate that.

I just came from the morgue.

The police say she was using drugs.

Well, they don't know that for sure until after the autopsy. I'd like to

her friend.

I'll call her for you.

Also, the English guy.

Well, I'm not sure that's such a good idea. I'm going to find out who murdered

my little girl.

We don't know she was murdered. Police are going to bury it like it never

happened. Alcohol and drugs, that's what they'll say.

Well, I'm sorry, but... They may be right. No, Mr. McDonough.

Ellen was a wonderful girl. Happy, always laughing, always full of life.

Now, if you'd please make those phone calls.

And I met Tim just a couple of days before I graduated.

Congratulations.

What do you do, Tim?

Nothing in particular. I sort of keep an eye on Mother's properties in New York.

Well, some people were born to do nothing in particular and managed to do

quite well.

You put yourself in that class?

Maybe. I suppose you could call me a salesman.

Door to door.

Phone to phone, actually. I buy and sell corporations.

No kidding.

You must do all right.

Yes, I do all right.

Me?

I'd get along fine without money.

If only other people weren't so crazy about it.

Well, I prefer to think of money as a pleasant bonus.

And why do you work so hard at making it?

Oh, you know something? I've been in this business so long, I really don't

remember why I do it.

Oh, I think that's sad.

You ought to let yourself enjoy life.

Oh, I do. When the wages of sin get paid, I plan on getting time and a half

overtime. So you don't believe in marriage?

Yes, I believe in marriage.

That's why I never married.

And I believe in getting to dinner on time. We better move on.

Thanks for the drink.

Sure.

Uh, Lisa.

Yes, Miss? Mr. Shepard.

You are right.

Life is there to be used by the young. See everything, do everything. Don't be

afraid to take chances.

That sounds like something you once tried to live by.

You live it for me.

I like you.

Mordecai, I'm Alan's father.

Mr. Lindstrom, you have my deepest sympathy.

That's not good enough.

Please, I understand your pain, but I'm in a terrible rush right now.

Perhaps we could discuss this later.

My daughter never took heroin in her life. You're the only one that could

given it to her. Please, Lindstrom, you're making a scene and you're keeping

from my dinner. You're not going to walk away from this. No?

Watch me.

Now, may I suggest that you find a more private way to expunge your grief than

assaulting people in public places?

After you wrap everything up, we'll spend a week with Mother, okay?

Tim, do you love me?

Of course I love you.

But how do you love me?

What kind of question is that?

Well, I mean... I mean, aren't you ever unsure?

I'm really tired. Do we have to talk about this now?

Well, it's just that everything's happened so quickly between us.

I've let you take over my life.

Well, that's what you wanted, wasn't it?

You spent your whole life in private schools. You know you want me to handle

everything now.

Well, then nothing's changed for me, has it?

Nothing's changed.

Thank you, Joan.

Harry, just want to remind you about the extra bar men for the Kano wedding.

Excuse me, Christine.

You know, I really tried to get in and see your demonstration this morning,

Cass. Were you?

Too bad, man.

It was filled with sleeping programmers who had obviously never heard of you.

Ever think maybe you're being a little too competitive, Errol?

That mean you give up on Julie?

I want to raise the stakes.

Okay.

She invites me home with her first.

You got to come work for me.

Okay,

and vice versa.

I've got just the job for you. Yeah, what's that? Janitor in my lab.

Scotch.

Scotch.

Scotch.

What happened to Tim?

Oh, wiped out. The red -eye finally caught up with him after dinner.

Is that why you called me?

No, it has nothing to do with Tim. It's just that I learned something tonight.

About me?

About me.

It's time I live my own life.

But Tim can't push me around anymore.

can be attracted to other men.

Lisa, there's a lot of things I can say. I'll just say one.

I'm 20 years older than you.

So what?

I already voted in one presidential election.

All right, I'll say something else then.

About your guardian.

He doesn't care about me.

Yes, he does.

He cares a great deal.

I understand.

You know him?

I didn't mean to ever make you unhappy.

Your father insisted that I keep your trust anonymous.

God, you.

You have no reason to blame yourself.

You were just playing with me.

I'm sorry.

Look, I've never been very good with other people's feelings.

Yeah, well, fine. You don't have to deal with mine ever again.

What are you doing here?

I smelled a fire.

Really?

Well, it appears you've had the wit to come up with a cover story.

But you've just broken my diplomatic immunity by opening that.

Prove it.

I didn't break into anything. You see anything broken into here?

That is protected by international law.

International law doesn't protect a man who murdered a woman by injecting her

with heroin.

That case is as inviolate as the British Embassy.

Tell it to the judge.

Beth.

I'm sorry, Julie.

I had to tell you.

I can't believe it.

I overheard that Kaz and Harold have this real competitive thing going.

This is terrible.

I'd love to be there when you blow those two away.

No.

No?

No.

If they want me that badly, I'm just going to have to let them have me,

I?

She's obviously still a child, emotionally. And whose fault is that?

Certainly not yours.

No?

Who left her to grow up alone all those years?

So that's why you finally decided to meet her in person.

Call it conscience, if you like.

I just feel that she deserves to see at least one face from her past.

Well, Zack, is there anything I can do?

You can check on that snooty kid.

Tim Fiedler? You don't trust him?

Sure I do.

I just don't like him.

That's outrageous, Inspector.

First Mr. Mortlake's suite is violated.

Now he's accused of murder.

Nobody's accused of anything.

Mr. Griffin said he was investigating a potential fire here. It's ridiculous. I

will not allow my client to be persecuted.

No, no, Fletcher. We must cooperate.

You see?

There.

Nothing but foreign office correspondence.

You've got the run lab tests on it.

You'll find traces of heroin in the leather.

Mr. Griffin, perhaps you've been too busy playing Sherlock Holmes to notice

I'm in a position to put you where you would like to put me.

Inspector, what if you did send a briefcase here and violate diplomatic

immunity? You'd have the biggest international...

dink on your hands since the war of 1812.

Now, gentlemen, if you will excuse me.

After all, I am the trade attache.

I do have consular matters to attend to.

I was your father's agent, Lisa.

And right or wrong, I promised him I'd never reveal his identity.

Oh, why not?

Well, what can I say? He was from an old money family. Who had no room for his

bastard child.

I don't justify it.

That's how it was.

What about my mother?

Your mother was a wonderful young woman.

If she had lived, she would have raised you as her own.

While she was expecting you, she told me she wanted to.

Don't you know I would have given anything to hear that ten years ago?

Lisa, I'm a bachelor.

What do I know about children?

Not just about children. You don't know anything about people.

You have everything that money can buy, all the women you want, and you're a man

who walks alone.

You know, the truth is... you don't even have the courage to care about anyone.

What do you mean you can't do anything?

You asked me to stay away from Mortlake and I did. Now he's going to get out of

this scot -free. Maybe not. The police have called in a minister counselor.

A what?

A kind of an investigator from the British Embassy. He was in Sacramento

he'll be here this afternoon.

Does that mean we can arrest Mortlake?

No, his diplomatic immunity is cast iron.

But if the minister -counselor thinks there's enough evidence, he can order

Mortlake back to England for a full official investigation.

What evidence?

That lousy dealer's flushed everything down the toilet by now.

Don't count on it.

Something on your mind, Billy?

Well, the guy carries around the kind of drug shop with him I saw.

He's no dealer.

He's an addict.

Mortlake? You're talking about an ex -public schoolboy whose family owns half

Somerset. Yeah, well, it's the thing about that old white horse.

Takes you for a ride, it doesn't stop to admire your old school tie.

How about dinner in the Crown Room, then back to my place?

into you?

After what Christine told you, how come you haven't matched that guy yet?

Oh, I intend to. With interest.

You know, Julie, I was just thinking, uh, well, you know, if you're free

tonight, uh... How about dinner?

In my place?

Wait.

Is that fireworks out here?

Just my little old heart pounding.

Oh, boy.

Just a little old firing squad.

There we are.

Happy to finally resolve your parents' truck.

Well, it's done.

Your life is now your own, Miss Herrick.

Thank you, Mr. Sullivan.

And your check.

I assume Mr.

Fiedler will be able to take care of your expenses while you're looking for a

job.

What? $2 ,336?

And 17 cents.

I don't understand.

I'm sorry about the trust fund. I know you expected more, but Wall Street

very kind to us.

What are you talking about?

Oh, so what? It's more than I wanted anyway.

You mean the fund's worthless?

Who cares about a silly trust fund? I'm starting work in the fall.

That's the spirit. You do just fine.

Right, Tim?

And I spoke to Tony Mortlake an hour ago.

Just sit down.

Oh, thank you.

Quite frankly.

I find these accusations hard to swallow.

How do you explain the heroin in his suite?

Inspector Alvarez told me he didn't even find a bottle of aspirin there.

I'd go to the wall for Mr. Griffin. If he said he saw heroin, he saw heroin.

And equally, you can understand my regard for Mortlake. I've known his

for years.

What happens now, Mr. Triton?

Well, I do what a minister counsellor is supposed to do.

I examine the police reports, talk to the girl's roommate.

And do nothing.

There'll be no slackness.

I intend to be thorough.

Oh, sure you will.

And you and your pal Mortley can go out for brandy and soda and toast the

playing fields of Eaton. Mr. Griffin, that's enough.

How in the hell did you get in here?

I think you've got bigger things to worry about than that.

You don't seriously intend to shoot me, do you? Griffin was right.

You're an addict.

That'd be absurd.

Knew a guy in a hospital in Korea.

Needed morphine to keep the screaming Mimi's away.

One night they were late with his fix.

And he was crawling the wall, screaming. Tried to kill himself with his belt.

What are you going to do?

Me?

I'm not going to do anything.

You killed Ellen.

And now you're going to kill yourself.

So just like that, you're leaving?

Well, not exactly leaving.

Mother just called and asked me to check out some property in Yonkers.

I have to catch the next flight back.

I knew things weren't working between us.

I could tell, even the way you kissed me.

I didn't know you were that experienced.

I'm not.

Guess I wanted somebody of my own for so long, I almost picked anyone.

Where do you get off calling me anyone?

You know, I didn't mean it like that.

We had some good times together.

Sorry my trust fund and I weren't what you expected.

At least I'm not a hypocrite about it.

What is that supposed to mean?

You and that aging playboy.

Opened his wallet and out you popped, right?

You want to know something, Tim?

My money wouldn't have made any difference to you.

Because people will always dislike you just for yourself alone.

Feeling pretty bad, are we?

You don't understand. I need it.

It's time.

Sorry.

No fix tonight.

What do you think about this table, Julie? It's secluded, discreet,

The maitre d' calls it the garble table.

Ah, but tonight I do not wish to be alone.

Now, you sure you know the routine?

Yeah, when I see Errol and Kaz at the table together.

You come over and give me the ten bucks. And I say that you won our bet.

That you could get both of them here on a double date. And then you and I go off

together, and I talk those two nerds an incredibly witty put -down.

Mind if we join you?

Oh, please, yes.

I'm just steering over these police reports.

I was way out of line upstairs.

I apologize.

I will say no more about it.

There's something else.

Mr. Griffin thinks that Mort Lake's a heroin addict.

You don't expect me to take that seriously, do you? Then ask him to

blood test.

I cannot conceivably ask him to do any such thing under these circumstances.

Any suggestion of a scandal could ruin his career.

You said you'd be thorough.

I am, damn it. What do you expect me to do?

Set the Thames on fire and throw Mortlake in? A blood test will do.

Isn't an innocent young girl's life worth that much?

Look, Julie, something's been driving me nuts all day.

I've got to fess up.

Well, Kaz and I, we made a bet about you.

You did?

Yeah, but I feel lousy because you're such a great lady.

Look, we shouldn't have done it.

You dirty rat.

You're trying to beat my time.

Julie.

Julie, my conscience has been killing me.

And I've got to tell you that... Kaz, I already told her.

You did?

I'm sorry, Julie.

Honestly, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me.

You guys.

You really mean that?

Oh, honestly, yes. You're great, weren't you?

I can't tell you how I've misjudged you.

And you know what really makes me ashamed is that we're the only two bird

that would ever dream up a bet like this.

Right.

Here's the ten bucks I owe you, Julie.

Guess you won the bet.

Ten bucks.

What bet?

That Julie could get the two of you here on a double date.

Did I miss the incredibly witty put down?

Do you know who I am, little man?

I am the Honourable Anthony Mortlake.

My brother is the Viscount Mortlake.

My father was the 18th Earl.

You understand?

Would you please get me the police?

What up?

Look at her.

I don't think you'll need the blood test now.

Good morning.

Morning.

I thought we'd concluded our business, Mr. Shepard. Not quite.

Thank you.

That's fine.

You know, of course, that your trust is virtually...

Non -existent.

What you don't know is that it was in that state when your father died.

I don't get it. Who paid all the bills for 20 years?

Mr. Shepard.

He, uh, asked me to give you this.

$50 ,000.

He wants you to have a good start in life.

What was all that stuff about me being broke?

Oh.

Having you appear penniless was the only way to make Mr. Fiedler show his true

color.

Why didn't... Mr.

Shepard told me that himself.

He has gone back to Chicago.

He should be leaving right now.

Hold it.

Thank you, Mr. Shepherd. Thank you.

Has Mr.

Shepherd checked out yet?

Excuse me. Mr.

Shepherd's car just left.

Crazy? Did you get something?

I never did give you that second, Rose.

Sometimes one is enough.

How'd the firing squad go last night? Oh, great.

I shot myself.

Foot. Julie, we're sorry.

Yeah, you really made us think what kind of dummies we were.

Look, maybe we could start over.

The two of us take you to the best place in town. Yeah.

Like the last few days didn't even happen?

Well, that is, of course, if you want to.

Oh, I want to.

You're terrific.

Yeah, you're the best.

By the way, Earl.

Did I tell you that my beta unit cracked the Times crossword in half the time of

your alpha unit?

And we've got him on methadone at the hospital.

Does that mean you'll be able to fly him back to London soon?

Oh, yes.

I assure you the Foreign Office intends to pursue this inquiry with full vigor.

You know, there are a couple of people who'd appreciate hearing that from you.

Yes, Mr. Lindstrom and Miss Myers.

I'm going to see them now.

I only wish I could bring Ellen back to them.

Well... Mr. Griffin.

Bye, dear fellow.

And look here.

Anyone ever doubts your word or your methods, you send it to me, right?

Well, looks like you're going to get an all -expense -paid trip to London,

Billy. I am?

Well, you're the star witness for the Crown, aren't you?

Does that mean they're not going to sue?

Sue for what?

You know, for investigating a fire in a hotel suite.

I guess as long as Britannia rules the way.

Then Billy can waive the rule?