Original subtitles

Okay. How about...

a rocket dog with space chips?

Spaghetti with meteors?

Galactic grape cup?

Elio, you have to eat something.

You remember what your mom used to order for you?

Major Solís, what are you doing here?

Hey! Yeah, I'm with my nephew.

I'm trying to get him to eat.

Oh, right. Your nephew.

I heard about your brother and his wife. I'm so sorry.

Thank you.

We're managing.

What about the astronaut program? Weren't you about...

No. Not anymore.

The timing just isn't right.

Of course.

But it's been great spending time with my new roommate.

Right, buddy?

Oh, no.

Hello from the children of Planet Earth.

Since the dawn of time,

humans have gazed at the stars and wondered...

are we alone?

Voyager is our attempt to find out.

This intrepid explorer is on a mission,

traveling farther than any human has ever gone,

to the distant reaches of the cosmos and beyond.

Voyager will never see those who made it again.

It will drift on, solitary and alone.

But maybe one day,

distant worlds will receive its message

and Voyager will complete its mission,

proving we aren't so alone after all.

Elio! Elio!

Elio...

Are you hurt? What happened?

What happened?

Is life really out there, Tía Olga?

What?

Come on.

You can't run away like that, Elio.

I should like to extend the greetings of the government and the people of Canada.

Hello from the children of Planet Earth.

Oh, wait.

Okay.

Elio!

Hey.

Are you Elio?

Who wants to know?

You put flyers up for a Ham radio club?

I am Elio Solís,

president and leader of the Ham Radio Club

of this beach.

Cool. I'm Bryce.

Great, cool, awesome. Did you bring it?

Oh, yeah. It's my dad's ham radio, but I have my own call sign.

It's PXLOL,

which sometimes makes people I talk to laugh.

How far have you called?

On Friday I talked to...

Ohio.

If I can pair these together, I can double their reach.

Okay, you can go now.

Go? Wait.

Where's everyone else?

Unfortunately, most of our members came down with...

amnesia and forgot to come,

but I'll see you at the next meetup in three months!

-What's up, Bryce? -Hey.

One, two...

You almost messed up there.

Hey.

Oh, yeah.

-Swoosh! -Nice.

This is Caleb. He wanted to come too.

Hey. What's with the hat?

Like I said, the meetup's been postponed. Shingles is no joke.

I thought it was amnesia.

Oh, my gosh, you're right. It's spreading.

-You better go before you catch it. Bye! -Yo, what's up with this guy?

Dude, chill.

He's the kid whose parents died.

Hey, that's classified information.

As leader of this radio club, I hereby...

Did you do that?

No.

-Is this supposed to happen? -Don't. Stop it!

Hello? Hello? Can you hear me?

-Let me see that. -Don't touch that.

-I was just looking at it. -I have to respond.

-Let go! -Quit it.

No!

Yo, that was not my fault.

I didn't mean to...

Oh, come on.

You suborbital, gaseous...

waste of mass!

Activate supernova blast!

Get off of me, you freak.

-Come on, guys, stop! -He bit me!

Hey, what are you doing?

Unbelievable!

Fighting on the beach, skipping school?

Am I going to have to put a tracker on you?

Now your eye.

The doctor said not to touch it for two weeks.

Elio!

You meant starting now.

This is serious! What were you thinking?

I was minding my own business, taking in the night air

-and suddenly these ruffians attacked me. -No, no, no.

Look at me in the eye and for once, tell me the truth.

No. I'm not learning Elioese.

Major Solís.

You going to the seminar tonight?

There'll be a speaker from the Astronaut Selection Program.

No. No, no.

Something came up.

Oh, is this the nephew we've heard so much about?

Yes, that's him.

-Gloodle! -Stop it!

I don't know if this is boundary testing, or sleep regression, or...

Which one of these is you?

I don't know, but I think that one is you.

Okay, I've got one last meeting.

So, I need you to sit here

and not move or speak

or injure yourself for 10 minutes.

I have enough to deal with already.

What's with this emergency meeting?

Oh, you didn't hear?

Melmac thinks he found aliens.

This ought to be good.

All right, Mr. Melmac, let's hear it.

Major...

Major Solís, earlier today,

I found this signal coming from interstellar space.

Melmac, please.

-It's late... -Wait, wait, wait.

Listen closely.

Hello, Planet Earth.

Hello, Planet Earth.

In 1977, NASA launched the...

-The Golden Record. -The Golden Record! Yes.

-The what? -The Golden Record, sir,

was Earth's message in a bottle.

Hello from the children of Planet Earth.

Don't you see?

Hello, Planet Earth.

I think someone in interstellar space found our message

and is sending it back to us as a reply!

-Melmac... -Major...

-Melmac... -Major!

We can't just leave it like this, we have to respond.

I've already rerouted every satellite to send the signal back.

Sure, it might cause a few system failures.

Whoop. Sorry. Maybe a small electrical fire,

but it would be worth it for first contact!

I have everything cued up and ready to go. Just say the word!

If someone or something is calling out to Earth,

who on Earth do you want taking that call?

You...

should go home.

-Take a week. -Take two weeks.

No. You got to believe me.

Major, please! They're out there!

Major!

Unhand me!

May I remind everyone that we are orbital analysts.

We track space debris, not rogue UFO signals.

Let's just...

Let's just take five.

It's been a long night.

What a nutjob.

This is Elio Solís of the planet Earth.

I come in peace...

and I'm super excited to join you.

I'm creative, hardworking...

shredded.

So please come and get me. I'll be waiting.

Okay, bye. Love you.

Yes.

Yes!

Yes!

Oh, no.

Time is of the essence. They could be here any minute. I got to pack!

I take full responsibility, but, I mean, you have kids, right?

I'll be out of your way soon. Don't worry.

-Just need a few snacks for the road. -Elio!

Sorry, ma'am. What was that?

Which will you miss the least? ¿Fuego?

-Fuego. Yeah. -I understand.

Should I bring forks, or would they think they're weapons?

Not worth the risk! I'll bring spoons.

Nice, peaceful spoons.

-Where's my good cape? -You too, ma'am.

-It's not in the wash, is it? -Thank you.

-Here it is! -Elio...

Blue or green? Which one says, "Take me with you,"

but not in a desperate way?

Elio, stop! Please!

Aliens are not coming for you.

But that guy said...

You're out of control. You got in a fight.

You shut down power to the whole base

and I almost lost my job!

We have to try something different.

Boarding school? You're trying to get rid of me.

No, this is just their sleepaway camp. It's just a couple of weeks.

I can't go. They're coming tonight.

You need to make friends or just a friend.

I don't care about friends. I need to meet aliens.

Why?

Because there's 500 million habitable planets out there

and one of them's got to want me! Because obviously you don't!

Of course, I do! We're family!

You're not my family!

Your life isn't up there, Elio.

It's down here.

I can't deal with this.

I don't know if anybody can deal with this.

When I drop him off tomorrow,

I'm going to see if they can enroll him in the fall.

I know,

but this just isn't how I thought my life would be.

It's an ancient human theme.

You can find it in virtually every culture,

in religion, folklore, superstition

and now in science.

The search for life elsewhere is remarkable in our age,

because this is the first time that we can actually do something

besides speculation.

We can send spacecraft to nearby planets.

We can use large radio telescopes

to see if there is any message being sent to us lately...

and it touches to the deepest of human concerns.

Are we alone?

No contact! No contact!

You know I went here too, when I was a kid.

You might not believe me right now...

but this will be good for you.

-Counselor Truman, could I have a word? -Of course, Major.

We got in so much trouble...

because of you.

Yeah. Thanks a lot.

-Better watch your back. -Yeah.

He's going to be so freaked out!

Follow my lead.

Quiet. Quiet.

We're not going to hurt him, right? Just scare him a little?

Come on, it'll be funny.

Shut up! You'll wake him up. Come on.

Quiet, quiet!

Greetings, Earthling.

We come in peace!

Where did he go?

Athena 5, there is a decommissioned satellite headed your way.

I'm calculating a new flight path for you. Standby.

Go ahead, Montez.

Minus 53, plus 32, roll seven.

Yeah, copy that.

Sorry about the scare.

There's been a lot of satellite interference today.

Roger that. Athena 5, over and out.

Elio!

-Come out, come out, wherever you are! -Elio!

-Don't you want to hang out with us? -I thought you wanted to meet some aliens.

Come on, it'll be fun.

He's out here somewhere.

Come on, Space Boy! We know you're out there.

Gotcha!

You found me.

This is payback.

It's okay. You don't need to pay me back.

Wait. What is that?

Hope you like how it tastes.

There's something back there.

Look!

You're so dead, Solís.

Hey, hold on.

Wait.

Please.

Yes!

Yes!

It's happening! It's really happening.

I knew it! I knew it!

Yes!

Yes, yes, yes!

Thank you!

Yes! Yeah!

Hi.

I knew it! I knew aliens were looking for me. You saved my life!

I promise I'll pull my weight on this spaceship?

Is this a spaceship? Anyway, where should we start?

Probes? Samples?

I've got plenty.

Testing, testing, testing.

Can you understand me now?

Yes. Wow.

It is a pleasure to meet you.

I am Ooooo, a liquid supercomputer.

Allow me to adjust your gravity.

-Oh, no, no, no. I'm fine. -Gravity on.

A welcome glass of glorp, compliments of the Communiverse.

Thank you.

Wait. The what?

Welcome to the Communiverse,

a pangalactic organization of the advanced species of the cosmos.

The greatest minds of the universe come here to share knowledge, innovation...

And recipes!

Welcome!

-Welcome! -Lovely.

Greetings, Ambassadors!

Absolutely ecstatic to make your acquaintance.

You've run dry. Let me top you off, old brick.

Thank you.

Yes. One cerebellum, four lobes...

and a medulla.

Do you mind if I take a little peek inside and see?

Questa, don't mindread him, you've just met him.

So sorry about that.

I am Questa of Gom.

Helix of Falluvinum.

Tegmen of Tegmeg.

And you are?

Elio Solís of, uh... Earth!

A toast to our new candidate, Elio Solís of Uh-Earth.

-There he is! -Elio Solís!

Look, it's Elio!

It's a new candidate!

Salutations!

I love your eye!

We search the universe for like-minded souls and new species

and we think you're an excellent candidate for Communiverse membership.

You mean I could stay here?

If all the members agree, then, yes.

You'll be one of us and be the proud bearer of one of these.

Now come, everyone's eager to meet you.

Each of us brings our specialized knowledge and interest to share.

Greetings, Naos!

Hello. Salutations.

Naos, here, created the Communidiscs we all use with controls for gravity...

temperature...

and all known languages.

You know Elioese?

-Gloodle! -Gloodle!

Gloodle!

This is my most recent design. Try it.

Hello.

I am the Universal Users Manual.

I contain the secrets of the universe.

What is the meaning of life?

What lies beyond a black hole? Is there a purpose to...

Who would win in a fight?

One gorilla with a baseball bat or ten chimps?

None who fight are true winners.

The gorilla.

These little critters are mimollusks.

They use nanotechnology to construct anything you desire.

Are you kidding me?

How dashing!

This is the most beautiful place I've ever seen.

This is the bathroom.

Gets me every time.

Bracing.

It's like I was always meant to be here.

I knew you were looking for me.

Of course we were looking for you.

Ever since we picked up this charming little spacecraft you sent us.

Voyager?

We found it in an asteroid field.

Nice craftsmanship.

Thanks?

Curious about the species who made it, we sent an invitation

and were delighted to receive your planet's official reply.

This is Elio Solís of the planet Earth and I'm super excited to join you.

I'm creative, hardworking, shredded.

So, please come and get me. I'll be waiting. Okay, bye. Love you.

-Very touching. -We are delighted

to finally make your acquaintance,

Leader of Uh-Earth.

Why is your face melting?

-Well... -Ambassadors,

an urgent matter requires your attention.

It involves the other candidate.

-Oh, him. -Oh, dear.

We should hurry. Quickly now!

Excuse us.

Please join us.

Your technology and my weapons would be an unstoppable alliance.

Now, admit me to your Communiverse!

Unfortunately, Candidate Grigon,

it is our assessment that you are

not a fit.

I, Lord Grigon,

Blood Emperor of Hylurg, not a fit?

Well, we believe in tolerance and open-mindedness...

I am tolerant!

So sorry, it's not you.

It's us.

I thought we said it was him.

If I cannot join the Communiverse,

then I shall take it by force!

Prepare to be conquered!

What a brute!

Why did he make a new hole?

I suggest we run and hide.

Yes, let's go to the edge of the cosmos and turn off all the lights.

That includes me, right?

Oh, so sorry, candidate Solís,

we couldn't possibly accept new members under the current situation.

Applications are closed indefinitely.

-But I just got here! -Such a shame.

Let's check back in a few thousand years?

Perhaps one of us could talk to Lord Grigon.

-You do it! -Not me.

-I am shy. -I'm busy.

-I have allergies. -My battery is low.

Don't worry. I'll return you to your life on Uh-Earth just as it was.

Just as it was.

No, no!

I'll do it.

I'm the leader of Earth.

I'm the perfect guy for the job.

What did it say?

-How curious. -I do not understand.

-You would talk to Lord Grigon? -But what would you say?

Are you an expert on conflict negotiation?

You kidding? My life is nothing but conflict...

and I've got the battle scars to prove it.

It would be a welcome change

not to flee every bully who covets our treasures.

Yes. What's in it for you?

Why would you agree to such a dangerous mission?

Because...

you need me.

And at my age it's really about giving back.

If you can make Grigon go away, we'd make you a member on the spot.

Then I, the leader of Earth, am ready to serve.

-Good. Very good. -How impressive!

-What courage! -Wonderful!

Candidate Solís, you continue to surprise.

When Grigon returns, we shall be ready for him.

Until then, as you say on Uh-Earth.

Okay, bye. I love you.

Okay. Bye. I love you.

Don't worry. I got this.

You're in great hands.

Just one last order of business.

Oh, yeah, of course.

While you negotiate with the warlord, you'll need a temporary replacement.

Can I trouble you for a DNA sample?

Sure. Where do you want it...?

Wow. My first probe.

World leaders, such as yourself, can't just disappear.

Your planet would descend into chaos.

That's what cloning clay is for.

Is this...?

Are you...?

Me?

Rock...

Paper...

Black hole!

-Space is the best! -Space is amazing!

In you go.

Sorry.

It's a living.

So, what is my motivation?

What do you mean?

Should I change anything

or just stick with the low self-esteem and desperation to belong?

What? I'm normal, just be normal.

No weird stuff, okay?

-Okay. -Okay.

Have fun.

Intriguing Uh-Earth custom. The warlord awaits.

There was just a few things I wanted to brush up on.

Where was that thing that knew everything about everything?

You mean this?

Hello. I am the Universal Users Manual.

Would you like to learn the meaning of life now? It's a...

No. I need everything you've got on how to negotiate with the warmonger.

Certainly.

-I have chapters on leading with empathy. -Nope.

-Fostering connection? -Nope.

Making the killer deal?

Yes, that one. Do you have a pen?

In the increasingly likely event that you will die,

would you like to notify your next of kin on Uh-Earth?

No, that's okay.

Start from a position of power.

The most important thing is to stay calm.

Don't you tell me to stay calm!

What is this, huh? A camp or a fight club?

He's an innocent little boy

and if this is what you call building character,

then I'll take it up with your boss,

or her boss. Everyone's boss!

Unacceptable!

I never should have left you here.

Yeah, they chased me because I'm weak and small,

but there was pizza for dinner. So, overall, a pretty good night.

How's the eye? Swollen?

-Did they hurt it? -It's fine.

I'm so sorry I didn't check in.

-Something weird was happening. -That's okay.

I was tracking this crazy signal from space...

Are we going home? What's for dinner?

Mac and cheese.

I just thought you'd be interested because if aliens were calling from space...

Early morning fog and clouds along the coast...

Elio?

Are we doing regular or white cheddar? I'm starved.

So, you don't want to talk about aliens?

Not really. I thought it'd be better if I just dropped it.

Really?

That's... amazing.

Good for you.

I love this song.

Do you see him?

Yes, and he's brought his...

compatriots.

Jolly good.

Okay. Be confident. Speak from a position of power.

He's here!

He's here. There he is.

The man of the hour.

Sorry I'm late.

So, is Lord Grigon coming here?

Oh, no. You will be going out there.

Okay, bye. Love you.

What is this?

Red? Green?

Welcome, Captain Solís.

You have selected a map of our coordinates.

Cabin pressure. Shield function. A nutritious shake. A breath mint.

A bladder evacuation module.

He found the mint.

You have set our destination to your home planet.

Uh-Earth.

Confirm or cancel?

Good luck.

Cancel.

Okay, okay.

A little to the left.

Get your nubs at ten and two.

What a heroic figure he cuts.

Hi. Take me to your leader?

Okay, look him in the eye. Stand your ground.

You're the alpha, you're the killer. You're...

This is who the Communiverse sends?

You are more puny than I expected.

I could say the same about you.

What?

What do you need to leave the Communiverse alone?

Hylurgians prefer to negotiate with screams in the air.

Pull!

Recoil's a little heavy.

Your turn.

Darn! I left my arm cannon at home.

Why don't we...?

Use one of mine.

So nice of you.

I mean, we're both leaders and...

Pull!

Surely we could find something to everyone's mutual...

benefit.

Trick shot.

Perhaps we are able to communicate... Pull!

But those Communiverse weaklings

look at me like some kind of monster.

How dare they reject me!

Well, if they don't want you,

why not find someone who does?

Come again?

There's got to be a place out there

that would love to have a strong guy like you.

But is the Communiverse not where the greatest leaders gather?

Am I not great?

Totally.

But why waste your life trying to connect with people who don't get you?

It's time to move on.

Right, Gri-guy?

Gri-guy?

Yes. What, Workko, what is it?

Your Wrath, the princeling wants to see you.

For the hate of the... Tell him I am busy!

So, as we were saying, forget the Communiverse...

You are a father, right?

Yeah.

It is so difficult!

He has no concept of the importance of my work.

I get it. If he's too hard to handle, then just ship him off.

That's what I did with mine. So...

"Too hard to handle"?

I mean...

You think I cannot handle my own son?

No, no, no. I don't think that...

No! Really. Tell me what I am doing wrong!

It's okay. I'm a bad parent too.

-What? -None of us know what we're doing.

We didn't even want this, right?

Let me remind you who you are dealing with!

I am Grigon, Blood Emperor of Hylurg...

scourge of the Crab Nebula and a great father!

Pull!

Right, why don't we take a little breather...

The negotiation is over. Gronk!

Show the prisoner to his quarters!

Prisoner? What?

You will watch from a cell as I destroy your beloved Communiverse!

No, no, wait!

He's really turned over a new leaf.

-Hey, Elio. -Hey, Jim. How's your back?

-Oh, you know... -I hear ya.

Camp must've really helped.

I guess it did.

But he was only there for one day.

I overheard the colonel raving about you.

Really? She was?

Yeah. You've been working really hard.

That's so good to hear. I thought I'd never get off her bad side.

Everyone's super impressed.

Wait, please. You made a mistake.

I'm the leader of Earth!

Gravity... off.

Okay, that's enough! Gravity back!

Okay. I'll just get back to Grigon. What haven't I tried?

"Bargaining chip"? Like, something valuable?

Where am I going to find...?

Hi, there.

I'm too young to die. I'm too young to die.

I'm too young to die.

What's happening? What's happening?

Translator disc, cool.

-Are you going to eat me? -What?

I was just swaddling you because you seemed scared.

That's what my mom does when I get scared.

I'm rarely unswaddled.

You're just a little kid.

So? Don't have to be rude about it.

No, no, no. Hey, come back!

I wasn't making fun of you!

My name's Elio.

What's your name?

You really want to know my name?

Well, I really want to get down.

I'm Glordon! No one's ever asked me my name before.

I mean, I ask a lot of questions all the time.

No one ever asks me about questions about me, though.

Like what my favorite color is.

It's purple, if you're asking. Are you asking?

What's wrong with you? That's just my carapace.

-What? -I'll show you.

Ta-da!

Every Hylurgian gets one when they come of age.

It's got weapons and bombs and stuff.

Ooh, and a cup holder!

It's bespoke.

So, if Hylurgians took off their armor, they'd look like you?

Yeah, but nobody would ever do that.

To expose your soft, warm flesh

would dishonor you and your whole family for all eternity.

I can't wait to get installed.

I'm going to look so hot.

Alert! A prisoner has escaped.

-Oh, no. -Are they talking about you?

It's a complicated political situation. You wouldn't understand.

-Are you a treacherous dissident? -Where is he?

-Check every chamber! -Are you an assassin?

-You two with me. Move! -What'd you do?

Yes, sir!

Come on, I'm really good at keeping secrets.

-Nothing here, sir. -Keep looking!

The secret is...

I'm a kid.

What? Really?

Mm-hmm.

And I kind of tricked the Communiverse into thinking I was the leader of Earth.

-What? -Just leave them alone

or else I'm going to be captured out of the only place I've ever wanted to be.

No way! You're crazy.

I know and now Grigon's going to blow everyone up

unless I can find a bargaining chip.

Something he values, but what does he even value?

Well, Dad values blood, glory, the misery of his enemies.

-There was this one time... -Hold up.

Grigon's your dad?

I thought you knew. I look just like him.

Check it out.

I've been working on my back.

Can I ask you a big favor?

Sure.

Bargaining chip. Cool.

I've never been a bargaining chip before.

I've been a liability. A disappointment.

-A deduction. -Are we almost to my ship?

Not far now. I've also been a pillow, an enigma,

a problem, a headache.

Little help, please.

Lately, I've just been ignored,

but now my dad's finally going to pay attention to me.

Do your parents pay attention to you?

Well, my Aunt Olga doesn't care.

With me out the way she can do what she really wants.

Like be an astronaut or whatever.

She gave up being an astronaut or whatever for you?

Wow. She must really love you.

No, no, she doesn't.

But now I'm free to join the Communiverse,

which is where I belong anyway

and that's where you come in,

bargaining chip.

Wiggle, wiggle.

Candidate Solís? Sorry to bother you.

It's just that the Hylurgian ships

seem to be pointing their cannons at us.

Is this part of the negotiations?

Oh, that's just a drill. Don't worry.

Wiggle.

Come on.

What are these tunnels for, anyway?

Oh, these are the lava flumes. They power the cannons.

Glordon, I am not fireproof!

-Really? Why didn't you say something? -Glordon!

It's okay. Just get in my mouth.

What? No way!

Trust me.

It's actually kind of comfy in here.

It is? I've never been in there. Hold on.

Yeah!

Refreshing.

You okay?

Yes!

Lower me down.

Thanks, Glordon.

It's nothing. Up top.

How long's the flight? Any snacks on board?

It's Candidate Solís! I'm sure he's bringing good news.

Look out!

I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited.

-Candidate Solís? -What's happened?

Ooooo, open a line to Lord Grigon!

-Of course. -Who is this?

Who is responsible for...

-You! -Yes.

It's me! The leader of Earth.

And the negotiation is not over because now I've got this!

Oh, my.

Glordon?

Yes, and pretty soon he's going to be Glor-done.

Hi, Dad. I'm a bargaining chip.

No. Say the other thing.

Help me, Father. He overpowered me.

He's too strong. Too shredded.

Quiet, you!

What is that unholy sound? Stop! Stop!

Only if you swear...

On your Hylurgian honor.

On your Hylurgian honor

to leave the Communiverse in peace and never return.

My Hylurgian honor?

Do you know what you are asking? I will...

Stop!

I concede!

I swear on my honor...

You are full of surprises.

You have my vow.

I will come to collect my son,

but if even one hair on a single nub is harmed,

you will feel my wrath.

Well done. I knew you had it in you.

Thank you.

Oh, I can't wait for this all to be over, and officially welcome you into the fold.

I'm customizing your membership badge right now.

Do you like the color?

It's beautiful.

And so well-deserved.

But first, let's prepare for Lord Grigon's arrival.

Come, everyone. Chop chop.

You guys go ahead. I'll take care of the bargaining chip.

Very good, Candidate Solís. Now, does anyone know a good caterer?

Oh, we did it.

Yeah. You were so cool.

Oh, you okay?

I've never been outside before.

It's cold here.

Wow! This thing's amazing.

Watch this. Gravity off.

Gravity off.

You think this is cool? Come on!

Your Wrath, the shuttle is ready. Shall we depart?

No, not yet.

The princeling was taken because he was vulnerable...

exposed, soft.

Prepare his carapace.

But that will take time, Your Bloodness...

Do it! We will perform Glordon's ceremony on the Communiverse

and they will quiver at the full might of Hylurg!

-Ready? -Yes.

No.

Okay, yes!

On three.

One, two...

-Two and a half. -Two and a half.

Three!

-Again? -Heck, yeah, again.

-On three. -One, two.

Yeah!

No, no.

Noice.

So, everyone speaks Elioese on Earth?

Nah, just me.

And my parents.

Or at least they did.

My aunt's not into it,

but I keep using it so I don't forget.

Did something happen to your parents?

Yeah.

I'm sorry.

I know it's not the same, but my mom's gone a lot.

Fighting the Blood Wars.

I miss her a ton.

Sometimes it feels like Dad doesn't even want me.

I know what you mean.

The only people who wanted me are gone.

But I don't know.

What if...

What if there's nothing about me to want?

I thought Earth was the problem...

but what if it's me?

Well, I like you.

And you seem fine to me.

He brought your carapace.

I guess so?

But that's good, right?

Yeah. I mean, it has a flame thrower, a circular saw, acid gun.

I'll get to fight, and conquer, and kill, and...

Glordon,

do you not want to get into your carapace?

Yeah, I mean, kind of, well...

No, no.

I've been pretending to want it, but I've been living a lie!

Once I'm installed, I'll never get to play, or swim,

or do anything.

It'll be the worst!

But why didn't you say something?

Because all Hylurgians have to do it!

It's tradition.

And if I don't,

my dad would hate me.

Glordon, you're not getting in there.

But I don't have a choice.

We'll figure it out.

I don't know how, but...

Oh, wait.

What?

What are we doing?

We're going to give your dad what he wants.

Me?

Well, yes, but also no.

Cloning clay? Are you sure about this?

Yeah. Why not?

I don't know. Would a clone really fool my dad?

He's pretty smart.

It's going to work. I'll show you.

Ooooo? Ooooo?

-Yes? -Can I check on my clone?

Certainly.

That smells good, papito.

It's a secret recipe.

You're going to love it.

How are you so good at everything?

Wow. I guess it does work.

Okay, let's do it.

Yeah.

Yeah!

Okay. Your dad will take your clone back to Hylurg,

I'll become an Ambassador,

and neither of us will have to see Hylurg,

or stupid Earth again.

It's a win-win-win.

Yes.

I'm Glordon!

Wow! Am I really that ripped?

You, follow us.

You got it.

You'll be safe in here. No one else can open it.

All right, Glordon, get in the ship.

Okay.

I can't tell you apart.

Yes!

Seriously, though, which one's real?

Me.

Stay inside and don't make a sound.

I'll be right back.

Come on.

You look so good. I can't even tell the difference.

I can't even tell the difference.

I know.

Who knew yogurt is just as yummy as butter,

and half the cholesterol?

It's perfect.

Let me get that for you.

Thanks so much.

Well, I'm going to turn in for the night.

All right. But first, get over here, kiddo.

Good night.

What the?

Hi. We should probably talk.

And for my next trick, think of a number.

Wait.

Okay, got it!

Yes, yes, yes.

I don't know how much longer we can stall.

Where is Candidate Solís?

I'm sure he'll be here momentarily.

I sense the number is

-seven. -What?

-She's right. -Enough!

Where is my son?

He's here. He's right here.

Daddy.

-He did not abandon us. -He's here!

Thank the stars.

Lord Grigon, we return to you Prince Glordon.

My son. Did he harm you?

Nope. Everyone was super nice.

Are you prepared to become the greatest war machine in the universe?

To make your enemies tremble at the sight of you?

To prove the might of the...

Yep! Let's do it!

Actually, I had more to say, but, yes, let us get on with it.

Oh, yeah.

Witness the power of Hylurg.

Witness!

-What a good show. -Very impressive.

That's right.

As you have kept your word,

I will keep mine and leave this place never to return.

Hylurgians, fall back.

Candidate Solís, you did it!

Well done.

What an exceptional specimen.

You good, son?

Oh, yeah. I can't wait to make endless war

and pillage the unworthy and bring eternal night...

May I have the honor of joining the Communiverse?

The honor would be ours, Candidate Solís.

Or should I say, Ambassador Solís.

You're one of us now.

-I like you. -Welcome!

It was a clone.

Where is my son?

But...

How could you tell?

A father always knows.

You, read his mind.

Find the truth.

No.

Unhand me!

I'm so sorry.

No.

No.

No, no, no, please. No!

What? What did you see?

Your son is in a diplomatic ship in the docking bay.

Send the troops!

Oh, more pudding, Elio?

Why, thank you, Glordon!

Elio?

You have selected a map of our coordinates.

Neck pillow. Lip balm. A breath mint.

Destination?

Uh, Earth.

Confirm or cancel?

What? Confirm?

Ooooo, open a portal to Earth.

What are you doing?

Will you tell them, or must I?

Please don't.

He is not the leader of Earth.

-What? -He is not the leader of anything.

He is just

a child.

-What? -Oh, no.

-I do not understand. -No.

She's wrong.

I am the leader of Earth.

I can still help!

Just please, please let me stay.

He is not there!

-What? -But I saw him!

We are as surprised as you.

Arrest them all! The Communiverse is now under Hylurgian control.

Don't touch me.

We can sort this out!

It's his fault, not ours!

Liar! Betrayer! Coward!

Leave! Now!

I'm so sorry.

You've done enough!

No!

Tear this place apart until you find my son!

No.

Don't leave me.

Please.

Oh, I'll take that.

Thanks, kiddo.

Shoot. I left the... That...

-I know what it is. Be right back. -Thank you.

You couldn't find it, huh? Would you toss me those?

Come on!

Stupid flashlight!

Sorry.

Are you okay?

No. I feel crazy!

I'm on the beach trying to make contact with I don't know what.

I just...

feel so...

alone.

You wouldn't understand.

Actually,

I do.

I didn't think you'd miss me.

I missed you.

I've missed everything about you.

But this isn't the life you wanted.

The only thing I want

is you.

Tía Olga!

Oh, hey, you're back!

Something's going on at the base.

Wait. That's my spaceship.

-Glordon's in there! -Who?

My friend.

-You made a friend? -Nice.

Yeah, and he needs our help. You have clearance, right?

Not for this.

There's got to be some way to get in there.

Okay, okay. Let me think.

Well, if you don't need me anymore, I will begin my decomposition process.

Feel free to spread me over a plant as nutritious fertilizer.

Wait!

They mention what it is?

Negative. But AARO's here and NASA's on the way.

Is it extraterrestrial?

What, like little green men? Don't tell me you believe in that stuff.

Who's there?

It's a kid.

Hey, you shouldn't be here.

Can you help me?

I don't feel so good.

Get it off me!

Get it off me!

It's in my mouth!

Why is it sour?

It's on me too!

Help! Help!

Thank you for your service.

Glordon!

Is that your friend?

Elio?

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

Why didn't you stay where I told you?

I'm sorry.

I accidentally turned on the ship.

Glordon? Glordon.

-Is he sick? -His disc is broken.

It's too cold for him here!

Hey!

Put your hands up! Back away from the specimen.

I said, back away! Now!

You learned Elioese?

Hey, what are you saying?

-Oh, you mean "glöp." -Stop that!

Gun it!

Oh, my gosh.

This is so...

Oh, my gosh.

Hold on, Glordon. Olga, you got to drive!

-But how? -Please!

Welcome, guest pilot!

Give me your jacket.

I'm so sorry, Glordon. This is all my fault.

Don't worry.

I'm going to get you home.

Ship, get us to the Communiverse.

Hyper-speed unavailable, path blocked.

What? It's totally clear.

I said, "Hyper-speed unavailable, path blocked."

Oh, come on!

What?

We're in a debris field.

-Let's just get out of here. -No!

-These objects are faster than bullets. -But this is what you do.

From the ground.

I don't know where the debris's coming from.

I need altitudes, velocity...

If I could just contact someone on the ground.

But the base is on lockdown.

Maybe someone with a Ham radio. I don't know!

Elio?

Bro, I bet that UFO was real.

What if they're here for food and the only thing they eat are hamsters?

I'm fine with that.

PXLOL, please respond.

PXLOL, come in!

Hello? This is PXLOL.

Bryce!

This is Elio.

Solís?

I'm sorry about what happened.

Caleb can be a real butt sometimes.

It's okay, I was a butt too.

Look, you might not believe this, but we're in an alien ship that just...

That's you? Aw, man! There's a lot of radio chatter about that.

Yeah, that's us. We're trying to fly through debris,

but we need to know where it's coming...

How's your math? Physics? Are you good at physics?

Bryce, I really need your help.

Please.

I don't know anything about debris,

but I know someone who does.

He's a legend in my radio group.

The boss. The eyes in the sky. He's...

Melmac reporting for duty!

I'll take it from here, PXLOL!

Elio, you better come back in one piece, okay?

I'll tell you all about it.

Thank you, Melmac, I owe you a huge...

Never mind that, Major.

A Master of Ham always helps in a jam.

Let's get you through this debris field.

I'm pulling up the network now. Get ready.

We need a fixed target.

Orion's belt.

Perfect. Drive straight toward it,

-and be ready to dodge. -Okay.

Ship, can you project a grid?

Okay. Melmac, anything out there! Hurry, before we're out of range!

Okay. Large rocket body!

Altitude, 407 kilometers,

velocity, 7.66.

Got it.

There.

Where? I don't see it!

Just pull back. Now!

Another one! 788 kilometers, velocity, 7.46.

-Climb fast! Now! -Roger!

We are going ham.

You're doing great.

Melmac, keep them coming.

Major, you're leaving the com window. Just stay on this frequency.

Stay... Frequency...

Melmac? Melmac?

Shields at 80%.

Glordon.

Is anyone there?

Please, anyone? Mayday! Mayday! Come in. Come in!

Shields at 60%.

Shields at 41%.

Shields at 23%.

Mayday! Mayday! Come in. Come in!

-Hello? -Shields at 16%.

Is anyone out there?

Can anyone hear us?

...Senegal.

Bonjour. This is Masters of Ham in Senegal.

Yes, yes. We read you.

Large debris at 1,300 kilometers, velocity, 7.2.

Pull back! Hard!

Thank you. Thank you.

Masters of Ham at your service.

This is Giulia from Italia.

This is awesome!

-2224, velocity 6.81. -Right.

This is Anoush in Armenia.

-Velocity, 6.75. -Right!

Namaste.

-This is Vikram from Mumbai. -Climb!

Debris at 2,753,

-velocity, 6.61. -Left!

-This is Hoang in Vietnam. -...velocity, 6...

Konnichiwa from Japan.

-You can do this! -You're going to be okay.

-You're not alone. -Hey, come on, buddy!

-Go, go, go! -Come on, kid!

-Keep going! -You're almost there!

There's one more piece! Move, move!

-Which way? -I don't know.

Path cleared.

Glordon?

Engaging hyper-speed.

Help us. Please.

-Elio. -Glordon. No!

Get off me!

Glordon.

Glordon, wake up.

No.

I can't lose you too.

No!

Explain yourselves.

I can't.

Just tell him.

He loves you.

Look how much he wanted you back.

I don't want to be a war machine.

You already know?

Yes.

I may not always understand you,

but I still love you.

It's a loose swaddle. I do not have your mother's touch.

You did great.

I have never uttered these words before,

but I am sorry.

Release them all.

Congratulations, Ambassador Solís!

But I lied to you!

And then you sacrificed yourself to save another.

You behaved as admirably as any real planetary leader.

And you did bring peace.

Eventually.

You have earned your place here.

I could stay?

Yes, yes, yes!

Excellent.

We can hang out every day.

This place is amazing,

but Earth is...

home.

I didn't give it a chance

but now,

I want to try.

With you.

Are you sure?

We're family.

This isn't goodbye.

It's just not yet.

We understand.

You are unique, Elio of Earth,

and "unique" can sometimes feel like "alone."

But you are not alone.

Okay.

Bye.

I love you.

Okay. Bye. I love you.

Okay. Bye. I love you.

Okay. Bye. I love you.

Okay. Bye. I love you.

I love you, too.

Let's go home.

It's an ancient human theme.

You can find it in virtually every culture.

In religion, folklore, superstition, and, now, in science.

The search for life elsewhere is remarkable in our age

because this is the first time that we can actually do something besides speculation.

We can send spacecraft to nearby planets.

We can use large radio telescopes to see

if there is any message being sent to us lately.

And it touches to the deepest of human concerns.

Are we alone?

Glordon, your disc is muted.

Oops, sorry.

Now, tell me everything.