Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:02,230
This is the Daily Show. We've got a
2
00:00:02,230 --> 00:00:02,240
This is the Daily Show. We've got a
3
00:00:02,240 --> 00:00:04,150
This is the Daily Show. We've got a
great one. I'm Michael Costa. We've got
4
00:00:04,150 --> 00:00:04,160
great one. I'm Michael Costa. We've got
5
00:00:04,160 --> 00:00:06,150
great one. I'm Michael Costa. We've got
so much to talk about tonight. Mag is in
6
00:00:06,150 --> 00:00:06,160
so much to talk about tonight. Mag is in
7
00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:08,310
so much to talk about tonight. Mag is in
a war over whether we're in a war. We'll
8
00:00:08,310 --> 00:00:08,320
a war over whether we're in a war. We'll
9
00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:09,910
a war over whether we're in a war. We'll
tell you where your tax dollars really
10
00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:09,920
tell you where your tax dollars really
11
00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:12,629
tell you where your tax dollars really
went and Leslie Jones tries to fix men.
12
00:00:12,629 --> 00:00:12,639
went and Leslie Jones tries to fix men.
13
00:00:12,639 --> 00:00:15,030
went and Leslie Jones tries to fix men.
Good luck. So, let's get into the latest
14
00:00:15,030 --> 00:00:15,040
Good luck. So, let's get into the latest
15
00:00:15,040 --> 00:00:19,670
Good luck. So, let's get into the latest
on America's war with Iran.
16
00:00:19,670 --> 00:00:19,680
17
00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:21,910
>> Nothing bad can happen. It can only good
18
00:00:21,910 --> 00:00:21,920
>> Nothing bad can happen. It can only good
19
00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:26,790
>> Nothing bad can happen. It can only good
happen.
20
00:00:26,790 --> 00:00:26,800
21
00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:29,509
We are now 4 days into this war and it's
22
00:00:29,509 --> 00:00:29,519
We are now 4 days into this war and it's
23
00:00:29,519 --> 00:00:32,470
We are now 4 days into this war and it's
going great. It's definitely not
24
00:00:32,470 --> 00:00:32,480
going great. It's definitely not
25
00:00:32,480 --> 00:00:34,709
going great. It's definitely not
expanding into an ever widening regional
26
00:00:34,709 --> 00:00:34,719
expanding into an ever widening regional
27
00:00:34,719 --> 00:00:36,389
expanding into an ever widening regional
conflict that puts Americans in
28
00:00:36,389 --> 00:00:36,399
conflict that puts Americans in
29
00:00:36,399 --> 00:00:37,830
conflict that puts Americans in
immediate danger.
30
00:00:37,830 --> 00:00:37,840
immediate danger.
31
00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:39,590
immediate danger.
>> Overnight, the State Department issuing
32
00:00:39,590 --> 00:00:39,600
>> Overnight, the State Department issuing
33
00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:42,310
>> Overnight, the State Department issuing
its strongest warning yet, urging US
34
00:00:42,310 --> 00:00:42,320
its strongest warning yet, urging US
35
00:00:42,320 --> 00:00:44,389
its strongest warning yet, urging US
nationals to depart now.
36
00:00:44,389 --> 00:00:44,399
nationals to depart now.
37
00:00:44,399 --> 00:00:46,389
nationals to depart now.
>> The State Department advising Americans
38
00:00:46,389 --> 00:00:46,399
>> The State Department advising Americans
39
00:00:46,399 --> 00:00:49,350
>> The State Department advising Americans
to evacuate from 14 countries covering
40
00:00:49,350 --> 00:00:49,360
to evacuate from 14 countries covering
41
00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:51,190
to evacuate from 14 countries covering
most of the Middle East.
42
00:00:51,190 --> 00:00:51,200
most of the Middle East.
43
00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:53,590
most of the Middle East.
>> Things are escalating fast. Americans
44
00:00:53,590 --> 00:00:53,600
>> Things are escalating fast. Americans
45
00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:55,670
>> Things are escalating fast. Americans
now have to evacuate from Saudi Arabia,
46
00:00:55,670 --> 00:00:55,680
now have to evacuate from Saudi Arabia,
47
00:00:55,680 --> 00:00:57,350
now have to evacuate from Saudi Arabia,
Carter, and several other countries
48
00:00:57,350 --> 00:00:57,360
Carter, and several other countries
49
00:00:57,360 --> 00:01:00,790
Carter, and several other countries
where Louis CK does stand up. Of course,
50
00:01:00,790 --> 00:01:00,800
where Louis CK does stand up. Of course,
51
00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:02,869
where Louis CK does stand up. Of course,
the problem with evacuating from a war
52
00:01:02,869 --> 00:01:02,879
the problem with evacuating from a war
53
00:01:02,879 --> 00:01:04,869
the problem with evacuating from a war
zone is that all the airports are
54
00:01:04,869 --> 00:01:04,879
zone is that all the airports are
55
00:01:04,879 --> 00:01:06,789
zone is that all the airports are
closed. And I'm sure our government
56
00:01:06,789 --> 00:01:06,799
closed. And I'm sure our government
57
00:01:06,799 --> 00:01:09,030
closed. And I'm sure our government
planned for this. US Ambassador to
58
00:01:09,030 --> 00:01:09,040
planned for this. US Ambassador to
59
00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:11,190
planned for this. US Ambassador to
Israel, Mike Huckabe, help us out. Tell
60
00:01:11,190 --> 00:01:11,200
Israel, Mike Huckabe, help us out. Tell
61
00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:13,429
Israel, Mike Huckabe, help us out. Tell
the stranded Americans how to get home.
62
00:01:13,429 --> 00:01:13,439
the stranded Americans how to get home.
63
00:01:13,439 --> 00:01:16,950
the stranded Americans how to get home.
>> The Israeli Ministry of Tourism is
64
00:01:16,950 --> 00:01:16,960
>> The Israeli Ministry of Tourism is
65
00:01:16,960 --> 00:01:19,670
>> The Israeli Ministry of Tourism is
providing bus service from several
66
00:01:19,670 --> 00:01:19,680
providing bus service from several
67
00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:24,310
providing bus service from several
locations.
68
00:01:24,310 --> 00:01:24,320
69
00:01:24,320 --> 00:01:26,390
I'm sorry. You want us to take a bus out
70
00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:26,400
I'm sorry. You want us to take a bus out
71
00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:28,789
I'm sorry. You want us to take a bus out
of a war zone?
72
00:01:28,789 --> 00:01:28,799
of a war zone?
73
00:01:28,799 --> 00:01:30,789
of a war zone?
In the movies, there's a chopper outside
74
00:01:30,789 --> 00:01:30,799
In the movies, there's a chopper outside
75
00:01:30,799 --> 00:01:32,950
In the movies, there's a chopper outside
and a and a Navy Seal comes down on a
76
00:01:32,950 --> 00:01:32,960
and a and a Navy Seal comes down on a
77
00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:34,390
and a and a Navy Seal comes down on a
rope and he pulls you on board and he
78
00:01:34,390 --> 00:01:34,400
rope and he pulls you on board and he
79
00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:35,830
rope and he pulls you on board and he
says, "You're going to make it in time
80
00:01:35,830 --> 00:01:35,840
says, "You're going to make it in time
81
00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:38,469
says, "You're going to make it in time
for your daughter's birthday."
82
00:01:38,469 --> 00:01:38,479
for your daughter's birthday."
83
00:01:38,479 --> 00:01:39,510
for your daughter's birthday."
But you're sitting there telling me,
84
00:01:39,510 --> 00:01:39,520
But you're sitting there telling me,
85
00:01:39,520 --> 00:01:41,830
But you're sitting there telling me,
"It's fine. Take the Greyhound. There's
86
00:01:41,830 --> 00:01:41,840
"It's fine. Take the Greyhound. There's
87
00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:43,350
"It's fine. Take the Greyhound. There's
there's no Wi-Fi." And the bathroom
88
00:01:43,350 --> 00:01:43,360
there's no Wi-Fi." And the bathroom
89
00:01:43,360 --> 00:01:46,710
there's no Wi-Fi." And the bathroom
works as long as you don't poop in it.
90
00:01:46,710 --> 00:01:46,720
works as long as you don't poop in it.
91
00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:48,469
works as long as you don't poop in it.
By the way, is this the official
92
00:01:48,469 --> 00:01:48,479
By the way, is this the official
93
00:01:48,479 --> 00:01:51,990
By the way, is this the official
ambassador outfit these days?
94
00:01:51,990 --> 00:01:52,000
ambassador outfit these days?
95
00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:53,590
ambassador outfit these days?
He looks like the guy who sits outside
96
00:01:53,590 --> 00:01:53,600
He looks like the guy who sits outside
97
00:01:53,600 --> 00:01:54,870
He looks like the guy who sits outside
of a gas station and gives you
98
00:01:54,870 --> 00:01:54,880
of a gas station and gives you
99
00:01:54,880 --> 00:01:56,389
of a gas station and gives you
directions to someplace in the woods
100
00:01:56,389 --> 00:01:56,399
directions to someplace in the woods
101
00:01:56,399 --> 00:02:01,190
directions to someplace in the woods
where he can kill you.
102
00:02:01,190 --> 00:02:01,200
103
00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:03,429
But you know what? I'm sure that mass
104
00:02:03,429 --> 00:02:03,439
But you know what? I'm sure that mass
105
00:02:03,439 --> 00:02:05,190
But you know what? I'm sure that mass
evacuations aside, the rest of the WAR
106
00:02:05,190 --> 00:02:05,200
evacuations aside, the rest of the WAR
107
00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:06,389
evacuations aside, the rest of the WAR
IS GOING GREAT.
108
00:02:06,389 --> 00:02:06,399
IS GOING GREAT.
109
00:02:06,399 --> 00:02:07,510
IS GOING GREAT.
>> Breaking news.
110
00:02:07,510 --> 00:02:07,520
>> Breaking news.
111
00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:09,830
>> Breaking news.
>> US Central Command says three fighter
112
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:09,840
>> US Central Command says three fighter
113
00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:13,270
>> US Central Command says three fighter
jets were shot down by friendly fire
114
00:02:13,270 --> 00:02:13,280
jets were shot down by friendly fire
115
00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:16,710
jets were shot down by friendly fire
from Kuwaiti forces. Sangon says all six
116
00:02:16,710 --> 00:02:16,720
from Kuwaiti forces. Sangon says all six
117
00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,790
from Kuwaiti forces. Sangon says all six
crew members aboard the jets ejected,
118
00:02:18,790 --> 00:02:18,800
crew members aboard the jets ejected,
119
00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:21,030
crew members aboard the jets ejected,
were safely recovered, and are in stable
120
00:02:21,030 --> 00:02:21,040
were safely recovered, and are in stable
121
00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:22,309
were safely recovered, and are in stable
condition.
122
00:02:22,309 --> 00:02:22,319
condition.
123
00:02:22,319 --> 00:02:24,229
condition.
>> Okay, now I know it's not great that our
124
00:02:24,229 --> 00:02:24,239
>> Okay, now I know it's not great that our
125
00:02:24,239 --> 00:02:26,550
>> Okay, now I know it's not great that our
allies shot our planes down, but the
126
00:02:26,550 --> 00:02:26,560
allies shot our planes down, but the
127
00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:27,910
allies shot our planes down, but the
good news is that they were probably
128
00:02:27,910 --> 00:02:27,920
good news is that they were probably
129
00:02:27,920 --> 00:02:30,070
good news is that they were probably
using the missiles we sold them, so at
130
00:02:30,070 --> 00:02:30,080
using the missiles we sold them, so at
131
00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:34,470
using the missiles we sold them, so at
least we know they work.
132
00:02:34,470 --> 00:02:34,480
least we know they work.
133
00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:35,750
least we know they work.
By the way, can we come up with a new
134
00:02:35,750 --> 00:02:35,760
By the way, can we come up with a new
135
00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:38,229
By the way, can we come up with a new
name for friendly fire? Shooting your
136
00:02:38,229 --> 00:02:38,239
name for friendly fire? Shooting your
137
00:02:38,239 --> 00:02:40,070
name for friendly fire? Shooting your
friend's plane down seems like the least
138
00:02:40,070 --> 00:02:40,080
friend's plane down seems like the least
139
00:02:40,080 --> 00:02:42,630
friend's plane down seems like the least
friendly thing you could do. Imagine you
140
00:02:42,630 --> 00:02:42,640
friendly thing you could do. Imagine you
141
00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:43,990
friendly thing you could do. Imagine you
find your best friend banging your
142
00:02:43,990 --> 00:02:44,000
find your best friend banging your
143
00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:45,670
find your best friend banging your
spouse and he's like, "Relax. Just a
144
00:02:45,670 --> 00:02:45,680
spouse and he's like, "Relax. Just a
145
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:51,270
spouse and he's like, "Relax. Just a
little friendly penetration."
146
00:02:51,270 --> 00:02:51,280
147
00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:52,949
But you know what? The pilots are okay.
148
00:02:52,949 --> 00:02:52,959
But you know what? The pilots are okay.
149
00:02:52,959 --> 00:02:55,030
But you know what? The pilots are okay.
We'll just buy some new planes. What
150
00:02:55,030 --> 00:02:55,040
We'll just buy some new planes. What
151
00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:56,150
We'll just buy some new planes. What
What do they cost?
152
00:02:56,150 --> 00:02:56,160
What do they cost?
153
00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:57,910
What do they cost?
>> We should note that the the estimates of
154
00:02:57,910 --> 00:02:57,920
>> We should note that the the estimates of
155
00:02:57,920 --> 00:02:59,830
>> We should note that the the estimates of
costs on these F-15 Strike Eagle jets
156
00:02:59,830 --> 00:02:59,840
costs on these F-15 Strike Eagle jets
157
00:02:59,840 --> 00:03:01,589
costs on these F-15 Strike Eagle jets
range from anywhere from $30 million per
158
00:03:01,589 --> 00:03:01,599
range from anywhere from $30 million per
159
00:03:01,599 --> 00:03:04,790
range from anywhere from $30 million per
unit all the way up to hund00 million.
160
00:03:04,790 --> 00:03:04,800
unit all the way up to hund00 million.
161
00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:08,470
unit all the way up to hund00 million.
>> Up to $100 million each. who may have
162
00:03:08,470 --> 00:03:08,480
>> Up to $100 million each. who may have
163
00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:11,110
>> Up to $100 million each. who may have
lost $300 million in one friendly
164
00:03:11,110 --> 00:03:11,120
lost $300 million in one friendly
165
00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:14,229
lost $300 million in one friendly
penetration incident.
166
00:03:14,229 --> 00:03:14,239
penetration incident.
167
00:03:14,239 --> 00:03:15,990
penetration incident.
I mean, look, I live in New York, so I
168
00:03:15,990 --> 00:03:16,000
I mean, look, I live in New York, so I
169
00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:17,670
I mean, look, I live in New York, so I
am used to seeing obscene amounts of
170
00:03:17,670 --> 00:03:17,680
am used to seeing obscene amounts of
171
00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:20,630
am used to seeing obscene amounts of
money wasted on jets, but still, 300
172
00:03:20,630 --> 00:03:20,640
money wasted on jets, but still, 300
173
00:03:20,640 --> 00:03:23,830
money wasted on jets, but still, 300
million.
174
00:03:23,830 --> 00:03:23,840
175
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:28,470
WHOA.
176
00:03:28,470 --> 00:03:28,480
177
00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:31,350
300 million is crazy. No, but on the
178
00:03:31,350 --> 00:03:31,360
300 million is crazy. No, but on the
179
00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:33,030
300 million is crazy. No, but on the
other hand, if we watch the video in
180
00:03:33,030 --> 00:03:33,040
other hand, if we watch the video in
181
00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:35,110
other hand, if we watch the video in
reverse,
182
00:03:35,110 --> 00:03:35,120
reverse,
183
00:03:35,120 --> 00:03:39,190
reverse,
I just saved us $300 million. So, not
184
00:03:39,190 --> 00:03:39,200
I just saved us $300 million. So, not
185
00:03:39,200 --> 00:03:41,750
I just saved us $300 million. So, not
bad for the old casta.
186
00:03:41,750 --> 00:03:41,760
bad for the old casta.
187
00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:43,270
bad for the old casta.
And the most upsetting thing about this
188
00:03:43,270 --> 00:03:43,280
And the most upsetting thing about this
189
00:03:43,280 --> 00:03:44,869
And the most upsetting thing about this
is that it's all happening under a
190
00:03:44,869 --> 00:03:44,879
is that it's all happening under a
191
00:03:44,879 --> 00:03:47,670
is that it's all happening under a
president who promised that this wasn't
192
00:03:47,670 --> 00:03:47,680
president who promised that this wasn't
193
00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:49,110
president who promised that this wasn't
going to happen. I'm not going to start
194
00:03:49,110 --> 00:03:49,120
going to happen. I'm not going to start
195
00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:51,110
going to happen. I'm not going to start
a war. I'm going to stop wars. No new
196
00:03:51,110 --> 00:03:51,120
a war. I'm going to stop wars. No new
197
00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:54,149
a war. I'm going to stop wars. No new
wars. We don't need the wars. My
198
00:03:54,149 --> 00:03:54,159
wars. We don't need the wars. My
199
00:03:54,159 --> 00:03:55,670
wars. We don't need the wars. My
personality is going to keep us out of
200
00:03:55,670 --> 00:03:55,680
personality is going to keep us out of
201
00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:58,229
personality is going to keep us out of
wars. I am the candidate of peace. I am
202
00:03:58,229 --> 00:03:58,239
wars. I am the candidate of peace. I am
203
00:03:58,239 --> 00:04:00,869
wars. I am the candidate of peace. I am
peace. I will stop the chaos in the
204
00:04:00,869 --> 00:04:00,879
peace. I will stop the chaos in the
205
00:04:00,879 --> 00:04:02,789
peace. I will stop the chaos in the
Middle East.
206
00:04:02,789 --> 00:04:02,799
Middle East.
207
00:04:02,799 --> 00:04:04,630
Middle East.
Well, well, well. Looks like we caught
208
00:04:04,630 --> 00:04:04,640
Well, well, well. Looks like we caught
209
00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:09,350
Well, well, well. Looks like we caught
Donald Trump in a lie.
210
00:04:09,350 --> 00:04:09,360
211
00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:11,429
That ought to do it for his presidency,
212
00:04:11,429 --> 00:04:11,439
That ought to do it for his presidency,
213
00:04:11,439 --> 00:04:13,350
That ought to do it for his presidency,
huh?
214
00:04:13,350 --> 00:04:13,360
huh?
215
00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:15,110
huh?
Not bad for the old casta. You're
216
00:04:15,110 --> 00:04:15,120
Not bad for the old casta. You're
217
00:04:15,120 --> 00:04:17,189
Not bad for the old casta. You're
welcome, America. All right, so to
218
00:04:17,189 --> 00:04:17,199
welcome, America. All right, so to
219
00:04:17,199 --> 00:04:18,870
welcome, America. All right, so to
Trump's supporters, I'm sorry, but you
220
00:04:18,870 --> 00:04:18,880
Trump's supporters, I'm sorry, but you
221
00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:21,430
Trump's supporters, I'm sorry, but you
have to admit he's gone back on his
222
00:04:21,430 --> 00:04:21,440
have to admit he's gone back on his
223
00:04:21,440 --> 00:04:23,510
have to admit he's gone back on his
promise by starting a new war.
224
00:04:23,510 --> 00:04:23,520
promise by starting a new war.
225
00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:25,590
promise by starting a new war.
>> This isn't a war. Uh we we haven't
226
00:04:25,590 --> 00:04:25,600
>> This isn't a war. Uh we we haven't
227
00:04:25,600 --> 00:04:27,430
>> This isn't a war. Uh we we haven't
declared war on Iran. I don't know if
228
00:04:27,430 --> 00:04:27,440
declared war on Iran. I don't know if
229
00:04:27,440 --> 00:04:28,950
declared war on Iran. I don't know if
this is technically a war.
230
00:04:28,950 --> 00:04:28,960
this is technically a war.
231
00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:30,550
this is technically a war.
>> Strategic strikes are not war.
232
00:04:30,550 --> 00:04:30,560
>> Strategic strikes are not war.
233
00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:32,230
>> Strategic strikes are not war.
>> Nobody should classify this as war. It
234
00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:32,240
>> Nobody should classify this as war. It
235
00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:33,990
>> Nobody should classify this as war. It
is combat operations.
236
00:04:33,990 --> 00:04:34,000
is combat operations.
237
00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,790
is combat operations.
>> Sure. Sure. It's a It's a strategic
238
00:04:36,790 --> 00:04:36,800
>> Sure. Sure. It's a It's a strategic
239
00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:39,110
>> Sure. Sure. It's a It's a strategic
combat operations. Guys, you can call it
240
00:04:39,110 --> 00:04:39,120
combat operations. Guys, you can call it
241
00:04:39,120 --> 00:04:40,550
combat operations. Guys, you can call it
whatever you want. We all know it's a
242
00:04:40,550 --> 00:04:40,560
whatever you want. We all know it's a
243
00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:42,870
whatever you want. We all know it's a
war. This reminds me of how my aunt
244
00:04:42,870 --> 00:04:42,880
war. This reminds me of how my aunt
245
00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:45,110
war. This reminds me of how my aunt
Trudy, she used to bring her so-called
246
00:04:45,110 --> 00:04:45,120
Trudy, she used to bring her so-called
247
00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:48,390
Trudy, she used to bring her so-called
roommate to Thanksgiving every year. We
248
00:04:48,390 --> 00:04:48,400
roommate to Thanksgiving every year. We
249
00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:50,070
roommate to Thanksgiving every year. We
all knew they weren't roommates. They
250
00:04:50,070 --> 00:04:50,080
all knew they weren't roommates. They
251
00:04:50,080 --> 00:05:00,230
all knew they weren't roommates. They
were soulmates and they were scissoring.
252
00:05:00,230 --> 00:05:00,240
253
00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:02,469
The war with Iran is just like my two
254
00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:02,479
The war with Iran is just like my two
255
00:05:02,479 --> 00:05:04,950
The war with Iran is just like my two
gay ants,
256
00:05:04,950 --> 00:05:04,960
gay ants,
257
00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:06,950
gay ants,
shown here, exactly how they look. By
258
00:05:06,950 --> 00:05:06,960
shown here, exactly how they look. By
259
00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:08,950
shown here, exactly how they look. By
the way, this all seems a little
260
00:05:08,950 --> 00:05:08,960
the way, this all seems a little
261
00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:10,950
the way, this all seems a little
familiar. Where else have I recently
262
00:05:10,950 --> 00:05:10,960
familiar. Where else have I recently
263
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:13,270
familiar. Where else have I recently
heard such a pathetic attempt to not
264
00:05:13,270 --> 00:05:13,280
heard such a pathetic attempt to not
265
00:05:13,280 --> 00:05:16,550
heard such a pathetic attempt to not
call a war a war? Russian forces began
266
00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:16,560
call a war a war? Russian forces began
267
00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:18,790
call a war a war? Russian forces began
hitting targets in Ukraine overnight.
268
00:05:18,790 --> 00:05:18,800
hitting targets in Ukraine overnight.
269
00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,469
hitting targets in Ukraine overnight.
Russian President Vladimir Putin
270
00:05:20,469 --> 00:05:20,479
Russian President Vladimir Putin
271
00:05:20,479 --> 00:05:22,390
Russian President Vladimir Putin
announced what he called a special
272
00:05:22,390 --> 00:05:22,400
announced what he called a special
273
00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:24,870
announced what he called a special
military operation. He refused to call
274
00:05:24,870 --> 00:05:24,880
military operation. He refused to call
275
00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:25,909
military operation. He refused to call
it a war.
276
00:05:25,909 --> 00:05:25,919
it a war.
277
00:05:25,919 --> 00:05:28,070
it a war.
>> Ah, great. Always good for the country
278
00:05:28,070 --> 00:05:28,080
>> Ah, great. Always good for the country
279
00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:29,909
>> Ah, great. Always good for the country
to have the same messaging strategy as
280
00:05:29,909 --> 00:05:29,919
to have the same messaging strategy as
281
00:05:29,919 --> 00:05:32,629
to have the same messaging strategy as
Vladimir Putin. We don't need Trump
282
00:05:32,629 --> 00:05:32,639
Vladimir Putin. We don't need Trump
283
00:05:32,639 --> 00:05:34,310
Vladimir Putin. We don't need Trump
copying more Putin does. It's a
284
00:05:34,310 --> 00:05:34,320
copying more Putin does. It's a
285
00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:35,830
copying more Putin does. It's a
slippery slope that could lead to the
286
00:05:35,830 --> 00:05:35,840
slippery slope that could lead to the
287
00:05:35,840 --> 00:05:38,390
slippery slope that could lead to the
worst possible scenario, Trump going
288
00:05:38,390 --> 00:05:38,400
worst possible scenario, Trump going
289
00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:44,150
worst possible scenario, Trump going
shirtless. And uh
290
00:05:44,150 --> 00:05:44,160
291
00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:45,510
and I know they don't want to admit it's
292
00:05:45,510 --> 00:05:45,520
and I know they don't want to admit it's
293
00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:47,110
and I know they don't want to admit it's
a war because that would require
294
00:05:47,110 --> 00:05:47,120
a war because that would require
295
00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:48,790
a war because that would require
Congress's approval and directly
296
00:05:48,790 --> 00:05:48,800
Congress's approval and directly
297
00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:51,189
Congress's approval and directly
contradict President Trump's promises.
298
00:05:51,189 --> 00:05:51,199
contradict President Trump's promises.
299
00:05:51,199 --> 00:05:52,870
contradict President Trump's promises.
But they're also so desperate not to
300
00:05:52,870 --> 00:05:52,880
But they're also so desperate not to
301
00:05:52,880 --> 00:05:54,950
But they're also so desperate not to
call it a war that one conservative new
302
00:05:54,950 --> 00:05:54,960
call it a war that one conservative new
303
00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:57,670
call it a war that one conservative new
ca newscaster is arguing with his own
304
00:05:57,670 --> 00:05:57,680
ca newscaster is arguing with his own
305
00:05:57,680 --> 00:06:03,830
ca newscaster is arguing with his own
graphics package.
306
00:06:03,830 --> 00:06:03,840
307
00:06:03,840 --> 00:06:06,550
All right. War
308
00:06:06,550 --> 00:06:06,560
All right. War
309
00:06:06,560 --> 00:06:11,749
All right. War
with Iran. Maybe it's war in Iran. War
310
00:06:11,749 --> 00:06:11,759
with Iran. Maybe it's war in Iran. War
311
00:06:11,759 --> 00:06:14,390
with Iran. Maybe it's war in Iran. War
from Iran.
312
00:06:14,390 --> 00:06:14,400
from Iran.
313
00:06:14,400 --> 00:06:17,029
from Iran.
WAR VIA IRAN.
314
00:06:17,029 --> 00:06:17,039
WAR VIA IRAN.
315
00:06:17,039 --> 00:06:19,350
WAR VIA IRAN.
WHAT if we combine them? Warran. Is that
316
00:06:19,350 --> 00:06:19,360
WHAT if we combine them? Warran. Is that
317
00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:22,070
WHAT if we combine them? Warran. Is that
anything?
318
00:06:22,070 --> 00:06:22,080
anything?
319
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:24,230
anything?
Look, call whatever you want. A war, a
320
00:06:24,230 --> 00:06:24,240
Look, call whatever you want. A war, a
321
00:06:24,240 --> 00:06:26,309
Look, call whatever you want. A war, a
combat operation, international fight
322
00:06:26,309 --> 00:06:26,319
combat operation, international fight
323
00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:28,390
combat operation, international fight
club. How long is this thing going to
324
00:06:28,390 --> 00:06:28,400
club. How long is this thing going to
325
00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:29,110
club. How long is this thing going to
take?
326
00:06:29,110 --> 00:06:29,120
take?
327
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:30,710
take?
>> This is not an endless war.
328
00:06:30,710 --> 00:06:30,720
>> This is not an endless war.
329
00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:31,830
>> This is not an endless war.
>> This is not endless.
330
00:06:31,830 --> 00:06:31,840
>> This is not endless.
331
00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:33,909
>> This is not endless.
>> The president doesn't believe in endless
332
00:06:33,909 --> 00:06:33,919
>> The president doesn't believe in endless
333
00:06:33,919 --> 00:06:34,550
>> The president doesn't believe in endless
wars.
334
00:06:34,550 --> 00:06:34,560
wars.
335
00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:37,590
wars.
>> This is no forever war, as Trump critics
336
00:06:37,590 --> 00:06:37,600
>> This is no forever war, as Trump critics
337
00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:38,950
>> This is no forever war, as Trump critics
keep complaining.
338
00:06:38,950 --> 00:06:38,960
keep complaining.
339
00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:40,870
keep complaining.
>> Yeah. Okay, but that's not as comforting
340
00:06:40,870 --> 00:06:40,880
>> Yeah. Okay, but that's not as comforting
341
00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:41,990
>> Yeah. Okay, but that's not as comforting
as you think it is. Don't worry,
342
00:06:41,990 --> 00:06:42,000
as you think it is. Don't worry,
343
00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:43,909
as you think it is. Don't worry,
everyone. This war will last a number
344
00:06:43,909 --> 00:06:43,919
everyone. This war will last a number
345
00:06:43,919 --> 00:06:47,510
everyone. This war will last a number
below infinity years.
346
00:06:47,510 --> 00:06:47,520
below infinity years.
347
00:06:47,520 --> 00:06:49,590
below infinity years.
But okay, fine. At least we know this
348
00:06:49,590 --> 00:06:49,600
But okay, fine. At least we know this
349
00:06:49,600 --> 00:06:52,230
But okay, fine. At least we know this
war won't be fought forever.
350
00:06:52,230 --> 00:06:52,240
war won't be fought forever.
351
00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:53,510
war won't be fought forever.
>> Breaking overnight, President Trump
352
00:06:53,510 --> 00:06:53,520
>> Breaking overnight, President Trump
353
00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:56,469
>> Breaking overnight, President Trump
touting that the US has a quote
354
00:06:56,469 --> 00:06:56,479
touting that the US has a quote
355
00:06:56,479 --> 00:06:58,629
touting that the US has a quote
virtually unlimited supply of weapons.
356
00:06:58,629 --> 00:06:58,639
virtually unlimited supply of weapons.
357
00:06:58,639 --> 00:07:00,629
virtually unlimited supply of weapons.
The president posting on Truth Social in
358
00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:00,639
The president posting on Truth Social in
359
00:07:00,639 --> 00:07:03,909
The president posting on Truth Social in
part, wars can be fought forever.
360
00:07:03,909 --> 00:07:03,919
part, wars can be fought forever.
361
00:07:03,919 --> 00:07:06,469
part, wars can be fought forever.
>> Great news, everyone.
362
00:07:06,469 --> 00:07:06,479
>> Great news, everyone.
363
00:07:06,479 --> 00:07:09,589
>> Great news, everyone.
Now the war never has to end.
364
00:07:09,589 --> 00:07:09,599
Now the war never has to end.
365
00:07:09,599 --> 00:07:11,189
Now the war never has to end.
I guess I'm happy for Trump that we have
366
00:07:11,189 --> 00:07:11,199
I guess I'm happy for Trump that we have
367
00:07:11,199 --> 00:07:13,510
I guess I'm happy for Trump that we have
unlimited weapons, but it's worth
368
00:07:13,510 --> 00:07:13,520
unlimited weapons, but it's worth
369
00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:16,550
unlimited weapons, but it's worth
considering what all these weapons cost
370
00:07:16,550 --> 00:07:16,560
considering what all these weapons cost
371
00:07:16,560 --> 00:07:18,150
considering what all these weapons cost
and whether we could be better spending
372
00:07:18,150 --> 00:07:18,160
and whether we could be better spending
373
00:07:18,160 --> 00:07:19,990
and whether we could be better spending
that money on something else here at
374
00:07:19,990 --> 00:07:20,000
that money on something else here at
375
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,830
that money on something else here at
home. I mean, we lost hundreds of
376
00:07:21,830 --> 00:07:21,840
home. I mean, we lost hundreds of
377
00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:23,670
home. I mean, we lost hundreds of
millions of dollars in a single friendly
378
00:07:23,670 --> 00:07:23,680
millions of dollars in a single friendly
379
00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:25,830
millions of dollars in a single friendly
fire incident. And some estimates say
380
00:07:25,830 --> 00:07:25,840
fire incident. And some estimates say
381
00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:28,309
fire incident. And some estimates say
that the entire war could cost over $200
382
00:07:28,309 --> 00:07:28,319
that the entire war could cost over $200
383
00:07:28,319 --> 00:07:31,749
that the entire war could cost over $200
billion. Yet, here in America, people
384
00:07:31,749 --> 00:07:31,759
billion. Yet, here in America, people
385
00:07:31,759 --> 00:07:33,350
billion. Yet, here in America, people
don't have healthcare. Our
386
00:07:33,350 --> 00:07:33,360
don't have healthcare. Our
387
00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:35,430
don't have healthcare. Our
infrastructure is crumbling. My local
388
00:07:35,430 --> 00:07:35,440
infrastructure is crumbling. My local
389
00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:37,909
infrastructure is crumbling. My local
library is only open two days a week,
390
00:07:37,909 --> 00:07:37,919
library is only open two days a week,
391
00:07:37,919 --> 00:07:39,510
library is only open two days a week,
which means for five days a week I have
392
00:07:39,510 --> 00:07:39,520
which means for five days a week I have
393
00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:44,230
which means for five days a week I have
to masturbate at home. It's shameful.
394
00:07:44,230 --> 00:07:44,240
395
00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:46,230
If there was only some image that could
396
00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:46,240
If there was only some image that could
397
00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:48,150
If there was only some image that could
symbolize the confidence I have in our
398
00:07:48,150 --> 00:07:48,160
symbolize the confidence I have in our
399
00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:51,670
symbolize the confidence I have in our
country's elected leaders right now.
400
00:07:51,670 --> 00:07:51,680
country's elected leaders right now.
401
00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:53,189
country's elected leaders right now.
Yep.
402
00:07:53,189 --> 00:07:53,199
Yep.
403
00:07:53,199 --> 00:07:56,919
Yep.
Yep. That's it.
34686
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof