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1
00:00:04,087 --> 00:00:07,631
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
CARSEY-WERNER AND FOX BROADCASTING
2
00:00:10,927 --> 00:00:11,844
[Deep Voice] YEP, THAT'S RIGHT.
3
00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:15,014
100 BAGS OF MANURE.
4
00:00:15,181 --> 00:00:18,142
YEAH, THE WIFE AND I ARE
REDOING THE FRONT LAWN,
5
00:00:18,309 --> 00:00:19,727
AND, UH, TELL YOU WHAT,
IF I'M NOT THERE,
6
00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:23,439
JUST DUMP IT ALL
ON THE FRONT PORCH.
7
00:00:23,606 --> 00:00:25,149
BYE-BYE.
8
00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:29,820
YEAH, MAN.
COACH JEFFERSON IS GONNA FREAK.
9
00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:33,949
YEAH, WELL, HE JUST SHOULDN'T
HAVE GIVEN ME THAT "D."
10
00:00:34,117 --> 00:00:37,828
OH, NO. DICK TRACY'S
TRAPPED IN A GIANT CLAM.
11
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:44,626
FAREWELL, SWEET DICK.
12
00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:51,884
A MAN BEING EATEN
BY A GIANT CLAM.
13
00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:54,595
NOW, I'M NOT
SIGMUND FREUD, BUT...
14
00:00:55,138 --> 00:00:56,388
ERIC,
15
00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:58,682
THE OMEN'S PLAYING
AT THE DRIVE-IN.
16
00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:00,893
YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS FOR US?
17
00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:03,312
IT'S MAKE-OUT CITY.
18
00:01:04,147 --> 00:01:09,693
I REALLY LIKE YOU
AS A FRIEND, KELSO...
19
00:01:09,861 --> 00:01:11,904
CAN I BRING A GIRL?
20
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:13,113
YEAH.
21
00:01:13,281 --> 00:01:14,698
MAN, IT'S GONNA BE GREAT.
22
00:01:14,866 --> 00:01:17,868
HORROR MOVIES TURN ON
CHICKS FASTER THAN PORNO.
23
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:21,246
REALLY? FASTER THAN THAT?
24
00:01:21,539 --> 00:01:24,583
YEAH, IF ONLY SOMEBODY WOULD
MAKE A PORNO HORROR MOVIE.
25
00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:27,419
OH, YEAH. THEN THERE'D BE
NO STOPPING YOU.
26
00:01:28,046 --> 00:01:29,046
ERIC,
27
00:01:29,172 --> 00:01:32,299
IS THAT KID FROM, UH,
NOT AMERICA DOWN HERE?
28
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,010
DAD, IT'S FEZ.
29
00:01:35,178 --> 00:01:36,303
YEAH, WHATEVER.
30
00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:38,180
THE ERDMANS CALLED, AND THEY...
31
00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:40,682
THEY WANT HIM TO...
32
00:01:40,850 --> 00:01:42,810
GO HOME.
33
00:01:44,229 --> 00:01:47,856
KELSO, STOP SAYING "PORNO."
34
00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:51,401
I DIDN'T SAY IT,
MR. FORMAN. FEZ DID.
35
00:01:52,028 --> 00:01:54,488
YOU ARE A BITCH.
36
00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:01,620
♪ HANGIN' OUT ♪
37
00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:05,374
♪ DOWN THE STREET ♪
38
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:09,044
♪ THE SAME OLD THING ♪
39
00:02:09,212 --> 00:02:12,548
♪ WE DID LAST WEEK ♪
40
00:02:12,715 --> 00:02:16,426
♪ NOT A THING TO DO ♪
41
00:02:16,594 --> 00:02:19,721
♪ BUT TALK TO YOU ♪
42
00:02:19,889 --> 00:02:22,099
♪ WHOA, YEAH ♪♪
43
00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:26,728
Steven: HELLO, WISCONSIN!
44
00:02:31,192 --> 00:02:33,652
OKAY, YOU KNOW
WHAT THIS IS, RED?
45
00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:37,156
SOME LADY MAGAZINE.
46
00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:38,365
IT'S COSMO.
47
00:02:38,533 --> 00:02:40,409
OH, MY...
48
00:02:41,369 --> 00:02:42,911
I'M GONNA TELL YOU
SOMETHING, RED.
49
00:02:43,079 --> 00:02:46,123
I JUST TOOK THE "HOW SPONTANEOUS
IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP" QUIZ,
50
00:02:46,291 --> 00:02:49,543
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
51
00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:50,836
WHAT?
52
00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:54,298
WE GOT 3 OUT OF 10...
53
00:02:54,757 --> 00:02:57,092
AND I CHEATED.
54
00:03:06,227 --> 00:03:07,686
GEE, I, UH,
55
00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:10,647
I CAN'T HELP BUT NOTICE
THAT YOU'RE POUTING.
56
00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:12,733
OH, NO, NO. I'M NOT POUTING.
57
00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:14,568
THAT WOULD UPSET OUR ROUTINE.
58
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:17,070
GOD KNOWS I WOULDN'T WANT
TO MOVE IN A NEW DIRECTION
59
00:03:17,238 --> 00:03:20,282
AND ACCIDENTALLY SLIP IN
A PUDDLE OF FUN OR ANYTHING.
60
00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:23,660
OKAY.
61
00:03:23,828 --> 00:03:26,121
HERE'S A THOUGHT:
62
00:03:26,289 --> 00:03:28,457
HOW ABOUT YOU AND I
63
00:03:28,625 --> 00:03:31,376
TREAT OURSELVES TO A NIGHT OUT?
64
00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:37,549
JUST THE TWO OF US.
65
00:03:37,717 --> 00:03:40,802
WELL, THAT'D BE GREAT, RED.
66
00:03:40,970 --> 00:03:42,804
WE'LL GO TO PHILLIES.
67
00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:45,807
PHILLIES, HUH?
68
00:03:45,975 --> 00:03:47,392
SO YOU'LL HAVE
THE SALISBURY STEAK,
69
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:51,396
AND I'LL HAVE
THE BAKED CHICKEN. AGAIN.
70
00:03:51,564 --> 00:03:53,899
WELL, MAYBE I WON'T HAVE
THE SALISBURY STEAK.
71
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:56,860
I ENJOY THEIR HAM.
72
00:03:57,028 --> 00:03:58,362
OH, HAM. WELL, OKAY.
73
00:03:58,529 --> 00:04:00,906
THEN I CAN CHANGE
ONE ANSWER ON THE QUIZ.
74
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,908
SO, OKAY, WE HAVE 4 OUT OF 10.
75
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,993
WE HAVE MOVED UP FROM
76
00:04:05,161 --> 00:04:07,412
"PREDICTABLE AS THE TIDES"
TO "HUMDRUM."
77
00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:09,665
HA HA HA HA.
78
00:04:09,832 --> 00:04:11,458
I'LL JUST GO CHANGE.
79
00:04:14,128 --> 00:04:16,213
DAMN COSMO.
80
00:04:17,173 --> 00:04:19,216
WHOO.
81
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,594
SON, WHEN WE TOOK YOU IN
82
00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:23,762
AS AN EXCHANGE STUDENT,
83
00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:26,098
YOU BECAME OUR RESPONSIBILITY,
84
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:27,933
AND WE'RE CONCERNED
ABOUT THIS GANG OF RUFFIANS
85
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:29,768
YOU HANG OUT WITH.
86
00:04:31,187 --> 00:04:32,521
THEY ARE MY FRIENDS.
87
00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:35,565
THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT
THEY WANT YOU TO THINK.
88
00:04:35,733 --> 00:04:37,609
NOW, WE'RE NOT INFLEXIBLE.
89
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:38,610
I MEAN, WE LOOKED THE OTHER WAY
90
00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:42,948
WHEN YOU STARTED
WEARING COLOGNE...
91
00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:44,783
BUT NOW...
92
00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:47,661
YOU'VE BROUGHT THE DEVIL'S
MUSIC INTO OUR HOME.
93
00:04:50,206 --> 00:04:52,040
OH, NO, THAT IS NOT
THE DEVIL'S MUSIC.
94
00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:54,626
IT IS ERIC'S.
95
00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:57,671
REBECCA, SHOW THE BOY.
96
00:04:57,839 --> 00:05:00,841
NOW LISTEN TO WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN SHE PLAYS IT BACKWARDS.
97
00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:05,178
[DISTORTED MUSIC]
98
00:05:05,346 --> 00:05:08,056
THAT CANNOT BE GOOD
FOR THE RECORD.
99
00:05:09,183 --> 00:05:12,060
THERE IT IS. "DEVIL LOVE ME."
100
00:05:12,228 --> 00:05:15,480
"DEVIL LIVES."
IT'S CLEAR AS DAY.
101
00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:20,944
WHAT'S FUNNY?
102
00:05:21,112 --> 00:05:22,738
IN MY LANGUAGE,
THAT RECORD JUST SAID,
103
00:05:22,905 --> 00:05:25,490
"I WANT TO SEX YOUR MONKEY."
104
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,626
WHICH I HAVE NEVER DONE.
105
00:05:40,757 --> 00:05:41,957
SO, DONNA, I WAS THINKING, UH,
106
00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:43,091
WE SHOULD GO SEE
A MOVIE TONIGHT.
107
00:05:43,259 --> 00:05:44,009
OH, COOL. I'D LOVE TO SEE
108
00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:45,844
ALL THE PRESIDENT'S MEN.
109
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:48,096
OH.
110
00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:50,682
WELL, I ACTUALLY HEAR
THAT ISN'T VERY GOOD.
111
00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:51,516
OH.
112
00:05:51,684 --> 00:05:52,476
YEAH.
113
00:05:52,643 --> 00:05:57,606
HEY, UH, I WAS THINKING
MAYBE THE OMEN.
114
00:05:57,774 --> 00:06:01,068
ISN'T THAT AT THE DRIVE-IN?
115
00:06:01,235 --> 00:06:05,197
IS THAT AT THE...
116
00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,574
YEAH, NO, I GUESS IT IS.
117
00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:09,618
SO DO YOU WANT TO GO?
118
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:11,203
TONIGHT?
119
00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:13,038
UM,
120
00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:15,415
YEAH, SURE.
121
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:21,421
Announcer: WHEN THE CHILD
WAS 5 YEARS OLD...
122
00:06:21,589 --> 00:06:24,132
SOMETHING TERRIBLE HAPPENED.
123
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:27,302
THE TRUTH. WHERE DOES IT END?
124
00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:28,261
THE OMEN?
125
00:06:28,429 --> 00:06:29,471
THAT'S AT THE DRIVE-IN.
126
00:06:29,639 --> 00:06:31,640
I KNOW. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
127
00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:33,141
I MEAN, I REALLY LIKE ERIC,
128
00:06:33,309 --> 00:06:35,394
AND I'D LIKE TO HAVE
A PHYSICAL RELATIONSHIP, BUT...
129
00:06:35,561 --> 00:06:38,897
IT'S CALLED MAKE-OUT, DONNA.
130
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:40,857
SAY IT.
131
00:06:41,025 --> 00:06:43,777
ALL RIGHT. MAKE-OUT.
132
00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:46,279
BUT I DON'T WANT IT
TO BE PUBLIC.
133
00:06:46,447 --> 00:06:48,365
I DON'T WANT IT TO BE TACKY.
134
00:06:48,533 --> 00:06:49,616
I DON'T WANT THERE
TO BE PRESSURE,
135
00:06:49,784 --> 00:06:50,826
AND NOW IT'S THIS TACKY, PUBLIC,
136
00:06:50,993 --> 00:06:53,954
PRESSURE MAKE-OUT THING.
137
00:06:54,122 --> 00:06:55,789
I UNDERSTAND. EVERYBODY
WANTS THEIR FIRST MAKE-OUT
138
00:06:55,957 --> 00:06:58,333
TO BE SPECIAL AND
SOMEPLACE ROMANTIC,
139
00:06:58,501 --> 00:07:01,586
LIKE IRELAND OR DISNEY WORLD.
140
00:07:05,049 --> 00:07:07,884
DISNEY WORLD?
141
00:07:08,052 --> 00:07:09,052
RIGHT, SORRY.
142
00:07:09,178 --> 00:07:10,554
SO, LET'S FOCUS.
143
00:07:10,721 --> 00:07:12,889
HE ASKED YOU TO THE DRIVE-IN.
144
00:07:13,057 --> 00:07:14,057
DONNA SAY YES?
145
00:07:14,058 --> 00:07:15,684
AND YOU SAID YES?
146
00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:17,436
YES. YES.
147
00:07:17,603 --> 00:07:18,603
YES. OH, THIS IS GREAT.
148
00:07:18,729 --> 00:07:19,563
ME AND JACKIE
WILL COME WITH YOU.
149
00:07:19,730 --> 00:07:20,272
NO.
150
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:21,189
WILL YOU COME WITH US?
151
00:07:21,357 --> 00:07:21,857
WHY?
152
00:07:22,024 --> 00:07:23,024
WHY NOT?
153
00:07:23,192 --> 00:07:24,432
WELL, YOU'D BE LIKE COMPETITION.
154
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:25,777
YOU'D BE LIKE A LOOPHOLE.
155
00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:26,987
COMPETITION? LOOPHOLE?
156
00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:28,613
YEAH, I'D HAVE TO KEEP UP
WITH YOU AND JACKIE,
157
00:07:28,781 --> 00:07:29,981
AND THAT WOULD MAKE ME NERVOUS.
158
00:07:29,991 --> 00:07:31,450
I COULD ALWAYS TALK TO YOU
IF I GET NERVOUS,
159
00:07:31,617 --> 00:07:34,453
'CAUSE YOU'VE GOT TO BE BORED
WITH SEX BY NOW.
160
00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:36,037
Kelso and Jackie:
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
161
00:07:36,205 --> 00:07:39,166
Eric and Donna: YOU GUYS HAVE
DONE IT, LIKE, A MILLION TIMES.
162
00:07:39,333 --> 00:07:40,125
TRUE.
163
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:43,462
WE HAVE NEVER DONE IT.
164
00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:47,549
YEAH. SLID IN TO HOME
ON THE SECOND DATE.
165
00:07:47,717 --> 00:07:48,757
WE GOT TO THIRD BASE ONCE,
166
00:07:48,885 --> 00:07:50,844
AND THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT.
167
00:07:52,054 --> 00:07:53,221
WHATEVER. WHATEVER.
168
00:07:53,389 --> 00:07:55,056
DON'T WORRY. WE'LL BE THERE.
169
00:07:55,224 --> 00:07:56,600
FINE. WE WON'T GO.
170
00:07:56,767 --> 00:07:58,560
PERFECT. THANKS.
171
00:07:59,228 --> 00:08:01,062
TV: ♪ NEW RICE-A-RONI ♪
172
00:08:01,230 --> 00:08:03,315
♪ THE SAN FRANCISCO TREAT ♪
173
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:06,401
♪ NEW RICE... ♪♪
174
00:08:06,569 --> 00:08:07,861
OKAY, NOW, SEE?
175
00:08:08,029 --> 00:08:09,029
THIS DRESS SAYS,
176
00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:13,450
"LOOK AT ME, NOTICE ME,
STARE AT ME."
177
00:08:13,618 --> 00:08:14,659
IT'S ALL WRONG.
178
00:08:14,827 --> 00:08:16,786
NO, YOU LOOK TERRIFIC.
179
00:08:16,954 --> 00:08:18,330
ESPECIALLY FOR DINNER
AT THE LION'S HEAD.
180
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:22,334
NO. IT'S NO GOOD. I... WHAT?
181
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:23,126
THE LION'S HEAD?
182
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:25,337
I THOUGHT
WE WERE GOING TO PHILLIES.
183
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:30,300
WELL, I, UH, CHANGED MY MIND.
184
00:08:30,468 --> 00:08:34,387
WELL, YOU NEVER DO THAT.
185
00:08:34,555 --> 00:08:36,848
THE LION'S HEAD.
186
00:08:37,016 --> 00:08:38,767
IT IS SO FANCY.
187
00:08:38,935 --> 00:08:43,188
THEY MAKE THE BUTTER LOOK
LIKE LITTLE FLOWERS.
188
00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,732
YEAH, YEAH, AND IT'S DIFFERENT.
189
00:08:45,900 --> 00:08:47,776
I MEAN, HELL, WE HAVEN'T
BEEN THERE IN YEARS.
190
00:08:47,944 --> 00:08:49,027
IT'LL BE FUN.
191
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:50,737
OH, OH.
192
00:08:50,905 --> 00:08:52,072
THIS IS SO EXCITING.
193
00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:54,991
OH, OH.
194
00:08:55,159 --> 00:08:56,618
OKAY, NOW, IF WE ARE GOING TO GO
195
00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:57,953
TO SOMEPLACE THAT FANCY,
196
00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:59,160
I HAVE TO SHAVE YOUR NECK.
197
00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:02,165
I'LL GET THE CLIPPERS,
YOU HOP IN THE TUB.
198
00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:09,130
I AM TELLING YOU.
199
00:09:09,298 --> 00:09:11,800
I HEARED IT.
200
00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:14,344
THE DEVIL IS SINGING
BACKWARDS ON THE RECORD.
201
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:19,057
IT'S NOT THE DEVIL, MAN.
202
00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:21,393
IT'S CONGRESS.
203
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:22,602
THEY PASSED A SECRET LAW
204
00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:26,731
TO PUT BACKWARD MESSAGES
IN OUR RECORDS, MAN.
205
00:09:26,899 --> 00:09:28,733
THEY WANT TO KILL ROCK 'N' ROLL
206
00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:32,195
BECAUSE THEY KNOW
IT MAKES US HORNY, MAN.
207
00:09:34,156 --> 00:09:35,240
DOESN'T, UH,
208
00:09:35,408 --> 00:09:38,868
DOESN'T PRETTY MUCH
EVERYTHING MAKE US HORNY?
209
00:09:41,455 --> 00:09:44,416
CARTOONS MAKE ME HORNY.
210
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:48,962
OH, AND... AND FOOD.
211
00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:50,672
WHEN YOU PLAY
THE RECORD BACKWARDS,
212
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:53,508
YOU CAN HEAR THE DEVIL SPEAK.
213
00:09:54,176 --> 00:09:58,888
I AM STARTING TO HEAR
HIM EVERYWHERE. AAH.
214
00:09:59,056 --> 00:10:03,518
[SPEAKING BACKWARDS]
215
00:10:03,686 --> 00:10:05,446
[AS ONE POSSESSED]
SATAN IS YOUR MASTER, FEZ.
216
00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:08,565
WORSHIP SATAN.
217
00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:10,900
[WHIMPERS]
218
00:10:11,068 --> 00:10:12,444
BUT BEFORE YOU WORSHIP SATAN,
219
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:14,154
GET HIM A CHERRY POP.
220
00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:18,617
GET SATAN A CHERRY POP.
221
00:10:18,784 --> 00:10:21,578
COME ON, MAN, GET ME A POP.
222
00:10:22,830 --> 00:10:25,790
FEZ, MAN, GET ME A POP.
223
00:10:25,958 --> 00:10:29,002
OH, I'M SORRY. I MISUNDERSTOOD.
224
00:10:29,211 --> 00:10:32,005
SATAN'S SECOND CHOICE
IS ROOT BEER.
225
00:10:36,385 --> 00:10:37,761
AY-YI.
226
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:49,064
WERNER, PARTY OF TWO.
227
00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:53,151
RED?
228
00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:55,445
WHAT IS THIS PLACE?
229
00:10:56,697 --> 00:10:58,490
EXCUSE ME.
230
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,200
WHAT HAPPENED
TO THE LION'S HEAD?
231
00:11:00,368 --> 00:11:02,327
BURNED DOWN.
FIVE DEAD. REAL SAD.
232
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:03,244
WELCOME TO BLANNIGAN'S.
233
00:11:03,412 --> 00:11:05,664
MAY I TAKE YOUR NAME?
234
00:11:05,831 --> 00:11:08,083
I'LL GET BACK TO YOU.
235
00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:10,794
WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
236
00:11:10,961 --> 00:11:14,339
WELL, UM,
IT CERTAINLY IS DIFFERENT.
237
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:15,757
MIGHT NOT BE SO BAD.
238
00:11:15,925 --> 00:11:19,052
ON YOUR LEFT, SPARKY.
239
00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:20,220
WELL, UM,
240
00:11:20,262 --> 00:11:22,514
THE STAFF IS CERTAINLY
ENTHUSIASTIC.
241
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,974
I'M SURE I CAN GET US
A NICE QUIET TABLE.
242
00:11:25,559 --> 00:11:27,852
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY ♪
[HONK HONK HONK]
243
00:11:28,562 --> 00:11:30,105
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY ♪ [HONK HONK]
244
00:11:30,272 --> 00:11:32,982
♪ TO YOU ♪♪ [HONK]
245
00:11:35,069 --> 00:11:37,070
I'LL PUT OUR NAME ON THE LIST.
246
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:42,701
[CLEARING THROAT]
FORMAN. PARTY OF TWO.
247
00:11:42,868 --> 00:11:45,662
OKEY-DOKEY. THAT'LL
BE ABOUT 2 HOURS.
248
00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:50,208
HERE'S 20 BUCKS.
249
00:11:50,376 --> 00:11:52,669
ALL RIGHT. WE'LL HAVE
SOMETHING IN ABOUT 15 MINUTES.
250
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:56,715
YOU DON'T WANT THIS PLACE
TO BURN DOWN TWICE, DO YOU?
251
00:11:59,593 --> 00:12:01,803
ALL RIGHT.
WE HAVE SOMETHING RIGHT NOW.
252
00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:03,888
THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT.
253
00:12:04,682 --> 00:12:06,850
WELL, SWEETHEART,
THIS IS OUR LUCKY NIGHT.
254
00:12:07,017 --> 00:12:08,810
OH, UH, WOULD YOU CHECK THIS?
255
00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:10,353
SURE.
256
00:12:10,521 --> 00:12:12,605
LOOKS REAL GOOD.
257
00:12:14,817 --> 00:12:16,276
ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO.
258
00:12:16,444 --> 00:12:18,737
UM, MAYBE I SHOULD, UH,
259
00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:20,780
GO BACK TO MY HOUSE
AND POP SOME POPCORN,
260
00:12:20,948 --> 00:12:24,200
'CAUSE... THEY
ALWAYS OVERCHARGE.
261
00:12:25,286 --> 00:12:27,036
JACKIE AND KELSO.
262
00:12:27,204 --> 00:12:28,747
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE?
263
00:12:28,914 --> 00:12:30,999
NOTHING. WHAT ARE YOU
GUYS DOING HERE?
264
00:12:31,167 --> 00:12:33,585
DONNA AND I
ARE GOING TO THE DRIVE-IN.
265
00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:34,753
REMEMBER?
266
00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:37,297
THANK YOU, ERIC.
WE'D LOVE TO GO.
267
00:12:37,465 --> 00:12:38,757
MICHAEL, GET IN THE CAR.
268
00:12:38,924 --> 00:12:39,507
BUT, I... DON'T...
269
00:12:39,675 --> 00:12:42,177
GET IN THE CAR.
270
00:12:45,389 --> 00:12:47,182
AHEM.
271
00:12:47,683 --> 00:12:50,018
LOOK, THIS ISN'T WHAT
WE TALKED ABOUT AT ALL.
272
00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:52,896
L-I'M SORRY, MAN.
273
00:12:53,063 --> 00:12:55,106
I'LL TAKE IT SLOW.
274
00:12:55,274 --> 00:12:57,233
TRY TO KEEP UP.
275
00:12:58,736 --> 00:13:01,905
WHOO-HOO! GOING TO THE DRIVE-IN.
276
00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:12,999
HELLO, I'M GUY,
AND I'LL BE YOUR WAITER.
277
00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:14,209
WOULD EITHER OF YOU
LIKE TO HELP YOURSELF
278
00:13:14,376 --> 00:13:17,045
TO OUR BLANNIGANTASTIC
SALAD BAR?
279
00:13:18,714 --> 00:13:20,340
WHAT'S A SALAD BAR?
280
00:13:20,508 --> 00:13:21,800
OH, IT'S RIGHT OVER THERE.
281
00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:24,636
ALL THE SALAD FIXINGS,
282
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,180
AND YOU MAKE YOUR OWN
BLANNIGANTASTIC SALAD.
283
00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:31,643
YOU MEAN MY WIFE
HAS TO MAKE HER OWN SALAD?
284
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,062
IT'LL BE WORTH THE TRIP.
285
00:13:34,230 --> 00:13:35,230
YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT?
286
00:13:35,314 --> 00:13:35,980
RED.
287
00:13:36,148 --> 00:13:38,650
NO, NO, NO, KITTY. IT'S OKAY.
288
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,401
UH, GUY,
289
00:13:40,569 --> 00:13:42,111
MY WIFE DIDN'T GET
ALL DRESSED UP
290
00:13:42,279 --> 00:13:44,155
FOR A SPECIAL NIGHT OUT
291
00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:46,241
SO THAT SHE COULD
MAKE HER OWN SALAD.
292
00:13:46,408 --> 00:13:48,159
SEE, SHE COULD DO THAT AT HOME.
293
00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:50,578
FOR FREE.
294
00:13:50,746 --> 00:13:52,789
BUT SHE WOULDN'T HAVE
8 BLANNIGANTASTIC DRESSINGS
295
00:13:52,957 --> 00:13:55,083
TO CHOOSE FROM AT HOME,
WOULD SHE?
296
00:13:55,251 --> 00:13:56,417
ARE YOU BEING A WISEACRE?
297
00:13:56,585 --> 00:13:57,585
RED, HONEY, HONEY,
298
00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:59,337
YOUR NECK VEIN. IT'S POKING OUT.
299
00:13:59,505 --> 00:14:01,005
SIR,
300
00:14:01,173 --> 00:14:03,508
I CAN'T BRING HER A SALAD.
I'LL GET IN TROUBLE.
301
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,969
WHAT THE HELL KIND
OF A RESTAURANT IS THIS?
302
00:14:06,136 --> 00:14:07,846
YOU GOT 8 PEOPLE SINGING
HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
303
00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:10,348
AND NOBODY CAN BRING
MY WIFE A DAMN SALAD.
304
00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:11,182
RED, HONEY,
305
00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:14,561
NECK VEIN, NECK VEIN, NECK VEIN.
306
00:14:14,728 --> 00:14:16,396
COME ON, KITTY.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
307
00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:17,939
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY ♪
[HONK HONK HONK]
308
00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:21,234
OH, SCREW YOUR
FREAKIN' BIRTHDAY.
309
00:14:28,117 --> 00:14:29,492
Announcer: PLEASE REPLACE
THE SPEAKER ON ITS RACK
310
00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:31,035
WHEN YOU'RE READY TO LEAVE.
311
00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:32,328
FAILURE TO DO SO WILL DAMAGE
312
00:14:32,496 --> 00:14:35,039
BOTH THE SPEAKER AND YOUR CAR.
313
00:14:35,207 --> 00:14:43,207
[OMEN SOUNDTRACK PLAYS HYMN]
314
00:14:44,967 --> 00:14:49,470
[SLURPING SOUNDS]
315
00:14:49,638 --> 00:14:53,558
GOD, THIS MOVIE
EVEN SOUNDS GROSS.
316
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:57,896
THAT'S NOT THE MOVIE.
317
00:14:58,063 --> 00:14:59,105
AHH.
318
00:14:59,273 --> 00:15:01,149
SO... [CLEARING THROAT]
319
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:02,942
YOU GUYS OKAY UP HERE?
320
00:15:03,110 --> 00:15:05,862
UH, NO. UM,
321
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:07,155
I WANT POPCORN,
322
00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:09,991
AND I WANT ERIC
AND KELSO TO GO GET IT.
323
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:11,534
OH, ERIC CAN GO GET IT.
324
00:15:11,702 --> 00:15:12,827
NO.
325
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:14,162
MICHAEL, GO.
326
00:15:14,330 --> 00:15:17,874
OKEY-DOKE.
327
00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:23,338
I DIDN'T BRING YOU HERE
TO SUCK KELSO'S FACE OFF.
328
00:15:23,505 --> 00:15:24,881
I KNOW.
329
00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:26,174
I'M SORRY.
330
00:15:26,342 --> 00:15:27,926
THIS IS SO AWKWARD.
331
00:15:28,093 --> 00:15:30,803
YOU'RE RIGHT, AND I WASN'T
BEING A VERY GOOD FRIEND.
332
00:15:30,971 --> 00:15:32,805
NO MORE MAKING OUT.
333
00:15:32,973 --> 00:15:35,266
I PROMISE.
334
00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:37,310
ALL RIGHT, UH,
335
00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,145
ABOUT THE POPCORN?
336
00:15:39,313 --> 00:15:40,313
I NEED MONEY.
337
00:15:40,439 --> 00:15:41,773
WHAT? I DON'T WANT POPCORN.
338
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:45,526
GET BACK IN THE CAR.
339
00:15:45,694 --> 00:15:48,279
SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT SHE WANTS.
340
00:15:52,409 --> 00:15:53,576
NO. MICHAEL, MICHAEL, NO.
341
00:15:53,744 --> 00:15:55,912
WE ARE GONNA WATCH THE MOVIE
WITH ERIC AND DONNA.
342
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,372
BUT I MISSED THE BEGINNING.
343
00:15:57,539 --> 00:15:58,081
OKAY, THE LITTLE KID'S A DEVIL,
344
00:15:58,248 --> 00:16:01,709
THEY HAVE TO KILL HIM.
WATCH THE MOVIE.
345
00:16:01,877 --> 00:16:04,045
Woman in movie:
LOOK AT ME, DAMIEN.
346
00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:06,589
IT'S ALL FOR YOU.
347
00:16:08,884 --> 00:16:10,635
[CRASH]
348
00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:15,306
AAH! AAH!
349
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:24,899
DONNA, IT'S...
350
00:16:25,067 --> 00:16:26,067
IT'S JUST A MOVIE.
351
00:16:26,193 --> 00:16:29,904
OH.
352
00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:33,992
DO YOU WANT TO SIT
SOMEWHERE ELSE?
353
00:16:34,159 --> 00:16:36,202
SO BAD.
354
00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:42,500
SO...
355
00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:44,168
HERE WE ARE.
356
00:16:44,336 --> 00:16:45,461
BACK AT PHILLIES.
357
00:16:45,629 --> 00:16:48,756
YEP. GOOD OLD PHILLIES.
358
00:16:48,924 --> 00:16:51,092
GOOD FOOD AT A FAIR PRICE.
359
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:53,845
YOU'RE ORDERING
THE SALISBURY STEAK, AREN'T YOU?
360
00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:58,099
NOPE. I'M GOING FOR THE HAM.
361
00:16:58,267 --> 00:16:59,892
RED, DON'T PUT YOUR
HAT ON THE COUNTER.
362
00:17:00,060 --> 00:17:01,894
IT'S ALL GREASY.
363
00:17:05,941 --> 00:17:06,941
HEY, PAL?
364
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:10,069
CAN I GET SOME,
UH, HALF AND HALF?
365
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:15,575
WELL, ISN'T THIS FAMILIAR?
366
00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:24,510
OKAY, NOW HERE'S HOW
WE SNEAK THE DEVIL MUSIC
367
00:17:24,585 --> 00:17:27,170
PAST OZZIE AND HARRIET.
368
00:17:27,337 --> 00:17:28,796
OBSERVE.
369
00:17:28,964 --> 00:17:32,008
ALICE COOPER, MEET PAT BOONE.
370
00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:36,596
[STRAINS]
DON'T RESIST ME, PAT BOONE.
371
00:17:36,764 --> 00:17:38,044
[FALSETTO]
NO, YOU'RE HURTING ME.
372
00:17:38,098 --> 00:17:39,557
COME ON, TAKE IT. NO, IT HURTS.
373
00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:40,516
COME ON. NO.
374
00:17:40,684 --> 00:17:46,314
OHH.
375
00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:49,609
BUT WHAT IF MY
HOST PARENTS HEAR IT?
376
00:17:49,777 --> 00:17:52,653
THEN SATAN COMMANDS
US TO KILL THEM, FEZ.
377
00:17:54,114 --> 00:17:56,783
NO.
378
00:17:56,950 --> 00:17:59,035
TELL YOU WHAT.
WE'LL USE THE HEADPHONES.
379
00:17:59,203 --> 00:18:00,953
YES.
380
00:18:03,499 --> 00:18:06,709
KITTY, I'M SORRY ABOUT TONIGHT.
381
00:18:06,877 --> 00:18:09,212
OH, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT, RED.
382
00:18:09,379 --> 00:18:12,840
YOU KNOW HOW EMOTIONAL
I GET WHEN I READ COSMO.
383
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:15,218
BOY, DO I.
384
00:18:15,385 --> 00:18:18,805
YOU KNOW, OKAY, AT LEAST
WE GAVE IT A TRY.
385
00:18:18,972 --> 00:18:20,848
I GUESS WE HAVE SLOWED DOWN.
386
00:18:21,016 --> 00:18:22,600
FLATTENED OUT.
387
00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:24,852
OH, AT OUR AGE, IT'S INEVITABLE.
388
00:18:25,020 --> 00:18:26,729
OKAY, THAT'S IT.
389
00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:28,856
RED! OH, MY LORD.
390
00:18:29,024 --> 00:18:31,692
YOU'RE NOT FLASHING BACK
TO GUADALCANAL, ARE YOU?
391
00:18:31,860 --> 00:18:33,402
HOLD ON, KITTY.
392
00:18:33,570 --> 00:18:35,822
THE NIGHT'S NOT OVER.
393
00:18:40,244 --> 00:18:42,495
YOU KNOW THE STARS
ARE REALLY JUST...
394
00:18:42,663 --> 00:18:43,663
FORGET IT.
395
00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:45,748
WHAT?
396
00:18:45,916 --> 00:18:48,918
NOTHING.
397
00:18:55,342 --> 00:18:57,885
WELL, UH,
398
00:18:58,053 --> 00:18:59,053
JACKIE AND KELSO HAVE CERTAINLY
399
00:18:59,221 --> 00:19:01,139
MADE THEMSELVES COMFORTABLE.
400
00:19:01,306 --> 00:19:02,765
YEAH.
401
00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:05,726
IT'S A ROOMY CAR.
402
00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:08,104
YEAH, IT IS.
403
00:19:08,272 --> 00:19:12,066
YOU KNOW, THE BENCH SEAT
IN THE VISTA CRUISER...
404
00:19:18,198 --> 00:19:18,823
IS THE SAME AS WHAT'S IN
405
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:19,991
THE FULL-SIZE PONTIAC CATALINA.
406
00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:21,951
WOW, THAT'S INTERESTING.
407
00:19:22,661 --> 00:19:26,831
[CHEERS FROM CROWD]
408
00:19:32,087 --> 00:19:35,214
Guy: SMOOTH MOVE, FORMAN!
409
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:58,654
OKAY, KIDS. BREAK IT UP.
410
00:19:58,822 --> 00:20:00,239
LET'S GO.
411
00:20:00,407 --> 00:20:03,951
WHOA. HEY, YOU'RE... ADULTS.
412
00:20:04,411 --> 00:20:06,162
DAMN RIGHT WE'RE ADULTS.
413
00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:07,622
I'M SORRY, SIR.
414
00:20:07,789 --> 00:20:09,373
MY MISTAKE.
415
00:20:09,541 --> 00:20:10,208
THAT'S QUITE ALL RIGHT.
416
00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:12,084
WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES.
417
00:20:12,252 --> 00:20:13,920
NOW, WHY DON'T YOU GO BUST
418
00:20:14,087 --> 00:20:16,214
SOME POT-SMOKING TEENAGERS
419
00:20:16,381 --> 00:20:18,257
BEFORE I GIVE YOU
A GOOD ADULT-SIZE
420
00:20:18,425 --> 00:20:20,426
KICK IN THE ASS?
421
00:20:24,264 --> 00:20:25,431
YES, SIR.
422
00:20:25,599 --> 00:20:27,683
THANK YOU, SIR.
423
00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:29,644
ENJOY YOUR EVENING.
424
00:20:31,146 --> 00:20:32,521
OH, RED.
425
00:20:32,689 --> 00:20:35,316
THAT WAS SO SWEET.
426
00:20:35,484 --> 00:20:38,319
YOU LET HIM OFF WITH A WARNING.
427
00:20:39,446 --> 00:20:40,905
YEAH,
428
00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:43,241
BUT YOU'RE NOT GETTING OFF
THAT EASY.
429
00:20:43,408 --> 00:20:45,576
OH, RED.
430
00:20:46,411 --> 00:20:50,456
♪ DA-DA-DA-DA-DA DA-DA-DA ♪
431
00:20:50,624 --> 00:20:52,917
♪ RAINDROPS KEEP
FALLIN' ON MY HEAD ♪
432
00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:54,252
♪ BA-BA ♪
433
00:20:54,419 --> 00:20:56,128
♪ JUST LIKE A GUY WHOSE FEET ♪
434
00:20:56,296 --> 00:20:59,215
♪ ARE TOO BIG FOR HIS BED ♪
435
00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:02,843
♪ IN-A-GADDA-DA-VIDA, HONEY ♪
436
00:21:03,011 --> 00:21:05,846
THIS LOUD MUSIC WILL NOT
DAMAGE MY HEARING?
437
00:21:06,014 --> 00:21:08,683
NO, NO. IT'S GOOD FOR YOU.
438
00:21:13,730 --> 00:21:15,106
HEY, DAD.
439
00:21:15,274 --> 00:21:16,399
HEY, SON.
440
00:21:16,566 --> 00:21:17,650
HOW WAS THE MOVIE?
441
00:21:17,818 --> 00:21:18,943
IT WAS PRETTY GORY.
442
00:21:19,111 --> 00:21:20,945
YEAH? HOW'D IT END?
443
00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:23,823
I DON'T REMEMBER.
444
00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:25,950
ATTA BOY.
445
00:21:31,456 --> 00:21:33,291
SO, HOW WAS YOUR NIGHT?
446
00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:37,003
IT WAS FANTASTIC.
447
00:21:37,170 --> 00:21:38,879
WELL, THAT'S GREAT.
GOOD NIGHT, DAD.
448
00:21:39,047 --> 00:21:41,424
NIGHT, SON. OH, AND, UH,
449
00:21:41,591 --> 00:21:43,884
BE QUIET GOING UPSTAIRS.
450
00:21:44,052 --> 00:21:48,139
YOUR MOTHER IS... VERY TIRED.
451
00:22:03,655 --> 00:22:05,323
SO PHILLIES WAS FUN?
452
00:22:05,490 --> 00:22:07,158
YES, INDEEDY.
453
00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:08,617
VERY DEPENDABLE.
454
00:22:08,785 --> 00:22:11,162
AS ALWAYS.
455
00:22:14,791 --> 00:22:22,791
[SPEAKING BACKWARDS]
456
00:22:23,383 --> 00:22:25,783
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
CARSEY-WERNER AND FOX BROADCASTING
457
00:22:25,802 --> 00:22:28,282
CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY THE
NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE, INC.
458
00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:32,027
PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF CAPTIONS PROHIBITED WITHOUT
PERMISSION OF NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
30069
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