Original subtitles

Come on, Joseph! Hit! Very nice.

All right, y'all, let's hustle up.

Daylight's burning. - Come on, let's hustle up!

Daylight's burning!

Okay, I'm okay. Sorry. Yeah, my bad.

Oh, looks like the possum ate another hole in the mat.

All right, just flip it on over.

Got it. Oh!

- Ew! - Oh, hell, no.

- What the [bleep]? - Let's flip it back.

Do I got to touch it?

Yeah, you're right. I was kidding.

In order to build a successful cheer team,

you need poise, athleticism, and, most importantly, money

for things like uniforms, clean mats, a functioning gym.

And back at SDSJC, we had all that.

I mean, hell, 80% of the athletics budget

went directly to the cheer team.

And here, we got zilch, nada.

Not a ton of poise and athleticism either.

Steven!

But money, that's something that's within our reach.

And by God, I'm gonna find it.

Five, six, seven, dip.

The good news is, even with all that,

the team is starting to settle into a rhythm.

Yes. All right.

The bad news is, it's raining inside the gym.

And it hasn't rained outside for five years.

- I would not do that. - Mmm. It tastes like soda.

Ooh, that burns. Ooh, that burns.

Call somebody! That burns.

♪ Okay, let's go, okay, let's go ♪

♪ Okay, let's go, five, six, seven, eight ♪

Okay, bye, Boon. Love you, honey.

Oh, hold on, baby.

Hi. Hi. You're taking off?

- Yeah. - Okay.

You're not leaving me here alone

with the girl, though, right? - Sally?

No, I'm dropping her off at The Candy Button Factory.

Why? What's the problem? - Okay. No, no, no problem.

She's sweet as a peach.

I just do not know how to talk to her.

Um, it's like I'm stuck in an awkward elevator ride

with a girl who's living inside of my house.

I'm ready.

Hey, Coach Potter. Hey, Boy Coach Potter.

Hello, Sally.

Um...

Well, this is my floor.

Point that toe.

- Like that? - Yeah.

All right, y'all, yeah, let's get to it.

Yep, come on.

Let's get to it, y'all. Giddyup.

DiMarcus, why are you walking like that?

Sorry, Coach, I played

a pickup game of basketball last night.

These dudes was talking trash, you know.

DiMarcus had to go dunk on 'em!

Truth is, I've been tap-dancing since I was four.

Last night I had a recital,

and I went a little too hard on my Maxie Ford.

Okay, well, no dunking until Daytona, all right?

Today we will--

Peaches, get off that thing before I toss it in a lake.

Sorry, it's my [bleep]-pot of a sister giving me crap.

She's pissed that I'm in college and she's not.

Well, I am sorry about that, but--

Wait, can she cheer?

Oh, you guys don't know her,

so you don't get why that's so [bleep]...

- Hey! - Stupid.

Peaches isn't so much a cheerleader

as she is a criminal who tumbles.

But she just has so much potential.

I just haven't quite found the right way to motivate her yet.

You see, cheerleaders--they respond to different things.

DiMarcus is praise. Steven is praise.

Madonna's prai--

Basically, everybody's praise, except Peaches,

who just does not care.

Whoo! Nice tumble, Peaches.

- [bleep] off, nerd. - Got it. You know I will.

I'm gonna keep trying, though.

I will find it.

Today we will continue drilling down on our walk-up extensions.

Ugh. They're so basic.

Can't we do something more exciting?

Yeah, I'm with Zizi on this.

I'd rather suck [bleep] out of a whale's [bleep].

Sorry. I'm not trying to be rude.

Try harder, honey.

Lest we forget, the last time we tried something fancy,

it didn't turn out so great.

So, until we get our star flyer back,

we are gonna to continue with the basics.

Basics are cool.

Any idea when Busted Barbie will be back?

Whenever she heals up

or whenever she gets kicked off "Love Island Poland"--

whatever comes first.

I'm here. Sorry I'm late.

- Good night alive, girl. - Yeah.

I've been pulling double shifts at The Candy Button Factory

to get ready for Button Day.

What in the world's Button Day?

You're serious?

Button Day is the greatest day of the year.

Yeah, it's basically a federal holiday in Headltston.

The Button Factory hosts a big festival

where the owner reveals the new button flavor.

It can be a tiny bit stressful, though.

The unveiling of the flavor is a huge secret.

And I would never forgive myself if I was responsible

for accidentally ruining the surprise for anyone.

And I know what you're thinking,

but it's not blue, so you can keep on guessing.

All right, let's get cracking, y'all,

or we're gonna have to do two-a-days on Friday.

We can't practice Friday, silly--school's closed.

Whole town is shut down for Button Day.

Okay, we'll do two-a-days on Thursday, then.

Oh, that won't work either. Thursday is Button Day Eve.

All right, Wednesday.

Wednesday's closed in anticipation.

- Tuesday. - Tuesday's a travel day.

Okay, well, if the whole dang town's about to be shut down,

we better get going, huh?

We got to get to Daytona, yeah?

- Yep. - All right.

I'm gonna count you off. And five, six, seven--

Oh, that leak is getting worse.

Okay.

All right.

You know what?

Sometimes life is gonna present you with obstacles,

but you could use them to your advantage, all right?

This is gonna be a great lesson.

You hear that?

I'm gonna count you off

to the sound of this leak-- let's go.

Get ready.

And five, six, seven, eight, go.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

And one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

Keep going.

It's a little fast, but I know that we can keep it together.

And we've got to-- Okay. Oh!

- [bleep]. - Oh, sweet Moses.

You know what? Let's just take 15, y'all.

Yeah? I'm gonna go talk to somebody.

- You wanted to see me? - Yeah.

Hey, Dot, I just wanted to ask you a question about the--

Oh. Why is there no money for the gym?

Are you accusing me of using school funds

to get my hair and makeup done?

Because you will never be able to prove it.

Dot, the gym--

If it's that important,

you should go see the school's benefactor.

Okay, where might that be?

The Candy Button Factory, open every day,

except Christmas and Tuesday.

Thank you so much for agreeing to meet with me,

Mr. Blimpfh.

It's "Shrimph."

- It's not "blimp" with a B? - No.

It's "Shrimph" with a "sh."

- Shh... - No, not shh...

Sh! - Sh!

It's sh!

Uh, just give me a look at your mouth.

- Sh! - Oh.

Well, it is just so good to meet you, Mr...

you.

- Hmm. - Where are you from?

I'm just--I'm detecting a slight German accent.

Got a little Hun in my background, too.

Probably why so many people call me "hon."

No, I was born and raised here in Headlestein.

My grandparents, the Blimpfhs,

left Europe after the Second World War in 1946,

and we settled here in Headlestein.

We took over the receipt and paper airplane factory,

and we've been pumping out Candy Buttons ever since.

So your family was persecuted?

By the end of the war, yes.

At the very, very end, mm-hmm.

I'm the cheer coach at Headlestein.

- Headltston. - Yes.

As the school's largest benefactor,

I was just hoping that you could direct

some of those funds towards my cheer team.

We are, after all, the Candy Buttons.

Mm. That's impossible.

My sole focus is making the most dazzling,

"schpectacular" Button Day yet.

Okay, well, if you're looking for "schpectacle,"

that's what my team does "besht."

Look at this.

She has flown.

- I know. - Oh!

Ah. - Yeah.

- You can do this? - Well, that's my old team.

If you can do this at Button Day,

I will write you a giant check.

How big a check are we talking?

Real big.

You got yourself a deal.

- Ha ha ha ha! - Okay.

Hey, can I ask you something? - Of course.

I am a figuratively open book.

- What's behind that do-- - Don't ask about that door.

You don't even look at that door.

♪ SS

Okay.

Okay.

I just got to see which of my girls can make a "schpectacle"

and fly like that by Friday.

Jesus be a "fensch posht."

Hey, baby, have you seen my--

Oh, I'm so sorry, Sally. I thought you were Courteney.

Oh, I am so sorry, Boy Coach Potter.

I will get out of your way. - No, it's fine. Um...

Sally, are those your bloomers in our sink?

My cheer shorts, actually.

Yeah, it's that time of year where everything gets covered

in button dust, you know? - Tell me about it.

No, I need you to tell me about it.

I don't know what you mean.

No, I can't because of the NDA.

I mean, of course I want to help out this poor girl

with a place to stay.

But I cannot for the life of me

figure out what to say to her, you know?

I mean, what if I have to fart?

I don't even do that in front of Courteney.

You know you're more than welcome to use

the washer and dryer if you want?

A washer-dryer inside the house?

Okay, King of England.

I have to see this.

Also, Sally, I did clear out a couple drawers in my office

if you want to put your stuff away.

Oh, no, that's okay.

No, I like to keep it all where I can see it.

I've had nine sets of foster parents, so I know the drill.

The second you get comfortable, unpack your things,

boom, house gets raided for being a cult,

and you never see your shower shoes again.

All right, y'all, we have got a big opportunity

with Button Day.

Peaches.

Sorry, it's my sister, Captain Butt Slut again.

I told you to stay off your phone.

- It's not my phone. - Hey, girl.

Hey, no phones at practice, all right?

We all have family...

or people who rely on us.

Pet?

Plant?

You got a fun key chain?

There we go. All right, I knew we'd find it.

So change of plans--we are going to be doing a basket toss

at Button Day.

Zizi, you want to be my flyer? - Yeah!

DiMarcus, how's your back feeling?

Better.

All right, let's see a back tuck.

Close, honey.

You're gonna be doing mat talk till Button Day.

Come on, man, mat talk's for old guys

that can't do nothing else. - Oh, stop it.

That's just an urban myth, all right?

I've been doing mat talk since you were in diapers.

So mat talk is the art of cheering on your teammates

from the sidelines.

It's all about keeping the energy up.

Yes!

Work it, DiMarcus! Pop it!

You know how pillow talk is the most important part of sex?

Well, mat talk is just as sexy...

but for cheer.

Zizi, you ready to fly high in a basket toss?

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

Ooh!

I'm good. Where'd everyone go?

Jesus be a helmet.

All right, y'all, good news-- Zizi's gonna be just fine.

Follow my finger.

But in an abundance of caution,

I am gonna need a new star flyer.

I'm not interested.

- I'm not asking you. - Why not?

It's just not in your skill set, doll.

That's for somebody with control, focus.

I'm in.

Found it.

I should have known

Peaches would be motivated by insults.

- Move, nerd. - Coach, Coach.

All right, Kyle, Kenneth, Keegan, let's try it.

Throw her up in a basket toss.

Hey, DiMarcus. Do the mat talk.

Whoo! You can do this!

But DiMarcus can do it better, and everybody knows that!

All right, I need all my tumblers healthy, okay?

So let's just start with a back tuck--be careful.

I don't want her splattered all over the floor.

- Splatter me. I dare you. - Don't do that, all right?

Commit to the skill. Stand up fast.

Yeah!

Guys, we got a new star flyer!

Krystal might have some competition

when she gets back, huh?

That's what I'm talking about.

Baby girl, this could change your whole life.

As a coach, I talk to teenage boys all the time.

I'm just gonna talk to Sally

same way I do my football players.

Sally, you pumped for the big day?

Oh, yeah. Button Day is the best day of the year.

And I've been guarding the new color

like my life depended on it.

It may.

Blue 42!

Who told you?

We're literally speaking two different languages.

I am just feeling so excited for Peaches,

and I'm guessing we're gonna see a whole new side of her.

Come on.

All right, I want to thank y'all

for coming in on Button Day Eve.

It was a big ask.

Where's Peaches? I need my star flyer.

Oh, she quit. Said she was going back home.

On Button Day Eve?

Whoo! Yeah! That's right!

She quit so good, she went home!

You did that! Way to go!

Whoo!

Wrong time. Right idea, wrong time.

- She asked me to do mat talk. - You gotta read the room.

- She asked me to do mat talk. - You gotta read the room, man.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I didn't know you were in here. - No, I can totally leave.

No, no, no, no. You stay. You stay.

That's my bad.

Um, what were you watching?

My favorite movie,

"Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls."

Yahtzee.

"Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls"

is your favorite movie? - Yeah.

No, I've seen it, like, at least 500 times.

It was the only movie they had when I lived at The Y.

It's actually why I'm minoring in pet detection.

Sally, "Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls"

is my second-favorite movie.

The original is my first!

- There's an original? - Hush your mouth.

Uh-uh.

Ooh...

I am about to change your world.

Okay, does he get birthed by a rhino in the first one?

No.

No.

No, that's okay. Just put it on.

- Okay. All right, yeah. - Okay, yeah.

There's some good bits in there.

Hey, there.

I'm Coach Courteney Potter, and I'm looking for Peaches.

Are you her mama?

No.

I'm her big sister, Vicky--

only by a couple months, though.

I mean, most people think we're twins.

Twin whats?

Oh, growing up, me and Peaches always used

to get confused for one another.

We still do.

It was kind of like "The Parent Trap,"

except with no parents.

One day when we were kids,

our dad went out for a pack of cigarettes.

Well, you know the rest of the story.

He came back with the smokes, and then he told us

he didn't want to be our daddy no more and took off.

So I've been taking care of Peaches ever since.

Do you have a cigarette?

Is she home or...

- Peaches! - Okay.

I didn't know you had a much older sister.

Not much older, just two years.

Oh.

Does she have some sort of a syndrome?

Yeah, the "having to take care of me

since she was nine" syndrome.

We've been through a lot together.

You drank all my Mountain Dew again, you dirty little whore.

You're the dirty little whore!

- You are tractor trash. - Slut bucket.

Daddy left because of you.

- Isn't she the best? - She is.

Two people years older?

We were in the same grade for a minute.

Anyway, look, I know being a flyer is hard.

And maybe you don't like responsibility,

but you cannot quit.

- That's not why I quit. - Oh.

Is it 'cause you're afraid to fail?

I've been to jail before.

You can't really fail much more than that.

Then what is it?

I just-- I'm at a loss here, honey.

You said this could change my life,

and I don't want my life to change.

Not even a little?

Being a flyer, it could-- it could take you places.

I don't want to go places. I like it here.

If I go to Button Day and I fly, I'm gonna crush it.

And the next thing you know,

I'm one of those cheer-lebrities like Krystal.

And then what happens to Vicky?

She keeps doing what she's doing...

with hopefully a little more sunscreen.

Our whole lives, it's been her and I together.

And I'm already going to college without her.

And then what, I become this breakout star?

Like, she'd hate that.

Peaches, the chances of you becoming a cheer-lebrity

are right around 0%.

- You really mean that? - I do.

Look, even if you became the best flyer in the state,

having a career in cheer after you graduate, it isn't likely.

- For real? - Trust me.

You get a chance to fly in this life, you take it.

- Think fast, loser. Ugh! - Ooh.

Hey, hey. She is not old enough to drink.

- Hey. - Oh, my gosh, neither am I.

- Give me that, whore! - How?

Hey!

Willkommen to Button Day.

Let the "schpectacle" begin!

It's the big reveal!

- Okay, you ready? - I think so.

- Yeah. - I know so.

Oh, I didn't know you were gonna be here.

Yeah, well, your coach got me a ticket, so here I am.

I'm really proud of you, monkey ho.

Thanks, slut bucket.

- Oh, stop it! Don't! - Okay, all right.

- Don't! - Y'all, hey.

Vicky, go on over here. - Okay.

You're gonna do a good job. - Okay.

- Do a good job. - All right.

Oh, hey, dude.

Do you think you could, um, buy me a button colada?

I left my fake ID at home, so it's, like...

Vicky. Please go to the front of the stage, Vicky.

- Okay. - Steven, she's half your age.

- What's her name? - Get on up here.

Such a beautiful Button Day!

It is my distinct pleasure

to welcome Heffleshtein's very own cheer squad--

der Buttons.

Let's go! Let's go!

Come on, Peaches! - Let's get that big old check!

Let's go, Peaches! Come on!

Lock it in! Lock it up! Let's go!

I will rip your head off and throw it over the smokestack!

And I will catch your head and throw it so far,

it'll go around the world and kick you in the ass!

- Yeah! - Yeah.

both: Yeah!

And that's how it's done.

All right.

Five, six, seven, eight... all: Roll, Buttons, roll!

♪ Ah

all: B-U-T-T, what? O-N-S!

Go, Buttons!

B-U-T-T, what? O-N-S!

Go, Buttons!

♪ Ah

♪ Candy

♪ Candy!

♪ Candy!

♪ I know a guy who's tough but sweet ♪

♪ He's so fine, he can't be beat ♪

♪ He's got everything that I desire ♪

♪ He sets the summer sun on fire ♪

♪ Ah, hey!

♪ I want candy

Oh, my God.

Throw the girl! Throw the girl! Throw the girl!

Make her fly!

♪ I want candy

♪ I want candy

Aah!

Aah!

The flavor is purple!

It's schpectacular!

Yes! Did you see that?

Did you see this girl fly?

That's the power of cheer.

It makes for unlikely friendships.

He's talking with his butt.

I told you it was funny.

Mostly...

It gives people a chance to fly...

Aah!

Who normally wouldn't get to.

Augustus came through. He gave us a giant check...

Which was for a tiny bit of money.

You're welcome.

We did manage to get a new trash can, a new mat...

A couple of pizzas.

But, most importantly, we got our new fearless flyer.

all: Peaches! Peaches! Peaches!

Stop. Stop, stop, stop.

Mmm, orange soda.

Mama, look!