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When I retire,
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I will reply to every email
I've ever flagged.
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00:00:30,840 --> 00:00:32,648
I will clean up my desktop.
4
00:00:36,158 --> 00:00:40,677
I'll read the 35 years of saved articles
on my reading list.
5
00:00:43,777 --> 00:00:46,087
I will finish all those books I started.
6
00:00:49,662 --> 00:00:53,434
I will play the lifetime of computer games
I missed out on.
7
00:00:55,388 --> 00:00:56,614
I'll birdwatch.
8
00:00:58,491 --> 00:01:01,259
I'll learn magpies are beautiful,
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but terrifying.
10
00:01:03,586 --> 00:01:05,774
I'll learn the names of trees,
11
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and know which spring flowers bloom first.
12
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I will swim every morning.
13
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I will learn to play a single piano piece
exceptionally well.
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Write a devastating, yet optimistic,
piece of poetry.
15
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When I retire,
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I will get a dog.
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I will get a cat.
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Jesus!
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I will start with a fish.
20
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Or maybe...
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maybe a terrapin.
22
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I will learn how a terrapin is different
from a turtle.
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And how that affects my choice.
24
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I will hike.
25
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I will see a point in hiking.
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I will know when a walk becomes a hike.
27
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I will get so good at meditation.
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I will be so present.
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So aggressively present.
30
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Then,
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I will patch that hole.
32
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Replace that button.
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I will learn how to juggle.
34
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Not just a 3-ball Cascade, Rubinstein's
Revenge.
35
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Argh!
36
00:02:28,499 --> 00:02:30,242
I'll organise my digital photos.
37
00:02:30,281 --> 00:02:32,315
Then my wardrobe.
Then my drawers.
38
00:02:32,379 --> 00:02:36,915
Then my pantry. Inspired by that book
about organising that I finally read.
39
00:02:36,980 --> 00:02:41,108
I will have to buy so many plastic boxes.
40
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Retired me will have so much money,
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as a result of the pension I haven't yet
started.
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I will find out what a pension is.
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I will order wine by year and specific
area of Italy.
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'Grazie.'
45
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But not in an annoying way.
46
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I will learn to like whiskey.
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I will get good at saying yes.
48
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I will get better at saying no.
49
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I will cry more.
50
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And less.
51
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When I retire,
52
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I will make the perfect meatball.
53
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And pair it with a 2019 red from Tuscany.
54
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The rain that year!
55
00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:35,363
My God, you can taste it.
56
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I'll smoke weed all day long.
57
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Or try some other drugs.
58
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Argh!
59
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I'll google 'microdosing' and start there.
60
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I will stretch.
61
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I will yoga.
62
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I'll drink eight glasses of water every
day.
63
00:04:02,957 --> 00:04:05,644
I'll sleep for 8 hours every night.
64
00:04:06,802 --> 00:04:08,355
I will see a play.
65
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I will see if I like plays.
66
00:04:13,338 --> 00:04:14,569
I'll give back.
67
00:04:15,285 --> 00:04:17,040
I'll know who to give back to
68
00:04:17,065 --> 00:04:20,321
And why I want to give back to them more than the
others.
69
00:04:21,137 --> 00:04:23,463
I will eat more vegetables.
70
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I will grow a vegetable.
71
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,237
I will find out what to do with a leek.
72
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I will find out what a leek looks like.
73
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I'll fight a man.
74
00:04:33,511 --> 00:04:35,361
I'll kill a fish. I'll drive a bus.
75
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I'll drive one of those airport cars.
76
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Nobody's going to stop me.
77
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I'll travel more, I'll travel more...
78
00:04:41,750 --> 00:04:43,828
I'll travel more.
79
00:04:44,465 --> 00:04:46,905
I'll get a telescope, get into camping.
80
00:04:46,969 --> 00:04:49,609
NO! CAMPING IS HORRIBLE!
81
00:04:49,679 --> 00:04:53,085
I will finally find my sport.
82
00:04:53,733 --> 00:04:55,435
I will paraglide.
83
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I will not paraglide!
84
00:05:01,545 --> 00:05:03,929
I'll move to a town by the sea.
85
00:05:06,744 --> 00:05:09,871
I've always loved towns by the sea.
86
00:05:12,578 --> 00:05:14,578
I'll remember to breathe.
87
00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:19,513
I will learn to speak another language.
88
00:05:19,892 --> 00:05:23,760
I will learn to tell people how I feel.
89
00:05:24,714 --> 00:05:27,066
I will take better care of myself.
90
00:05:32,246 --> 00:05:34,506
I will take better care of my body.
91
00:05:34,544 --> 00:05:36,794
I will take better care of my teeth.
92
00:05:36,932 --> 00:05:39,531
I will take better care of my mind.
93
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Meet up with that person.
94
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Have that conversation.
95
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I'll go to an art gallery.
96
00:05:52,129 --> 00:05:54,683
I'll want to be there, once I get there.
97
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I will completely nail my final words.
98
00:06:14,693 --> 00:06:18,772
I will haunt the absolute shit out of my
sixth class enemy...
99
00:06:18,797 --> 00:06:19,942
- 'Deirdre!'
- Argh!
100
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.. Deirdre Hogan.
101
00:06:25,607 --> 00:06:29,512
I'll finally know if you have the time you
have, and then it ends?
102
00:06:31,668 --> 00:06:33,686
Or if there is more time.
103
00:06:52,235 --> 00:06:55,743
Subtitle and Transcribe by
Sir Allix
7143
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