Original subtitles

♪♪ Me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Together, we can't lose ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you, me and you ♪♪ [echoes]

I'll stop you

if it's the last thing I do!

[announcer] Coming soon to a theater near you!

[both] Ooh!

Revenge is so sick!

[both laughing]

[Min] Jack? Lil?

[echoing] Family meeting!

[Lily whimpering]

-[yelps] -[grunts] Nice try!

[panting, grunting]

[gasps]

[both whimper]

[clears throat]

Per the Wylde Pak family bylaws,

the children must be given a verbal notice

24 hours before dentist appointments.

Oh.

I can't remember the last time I had a cleaning.

No son of mine will get cavities

and soil the good Wylde name!

You're going to the dentist, and that's final!

Okay.

Well... alright then!

[Lily grunting]

-♪ tense music building ♪ -[grumbling]

What, Lily?

[rope snaps]

[enraged murmur building]

-[ding] -♪ music halts ♪

Everything seems to be in order.

-Really? -Yeah.

That was... easy.

Too easy.

Pfft. I'm grown.

I can handle the dentist.

[both] Hmm...

Well, guess we don't need this after all!

[groans]

Wow, Lil! I thought you'd put up more of a fight.

-Aren't we getting mature-- -No!

-[thuds] -I spoke too soon.

Come on, Lily, gotta think of an excuse to get out of this!

[Halmoni] Oh, thank you, Granddaughter.

-Lily, it's just-- -Shh!

[in English] Soyoon woke up from her coma?!

Uh, I'll-- I'll leave right now!

Leave? Can't you see we're all here for Cha-rye?

You cannot miss Chuseok like this, Jinsoo!

[woman on phone] Hello? Are you coming?

You're right... I can't go.

It's Chuseok!

-[woman] Jinsoo! Please! -[beeps]

How do you turn off the dub?

What's Chuseok?

It's like Korean Thanksgiving.

The big Korean holiday.

[Jack] Whoa! All that food looks so good!

Why don't we ever eat like that?

Ay! Cooking a feast that size?

It will take all day.

All... day!

You know, Halmoni, I feel like I've really lost touch

with my Korean side.

I would love to celebrate Chuseok.

Right now!

Huh? Celebrate Chuseok?

No, no, no, no-- Wha! [yelps]

[giggles] Yeah, no.

It's, uh, summer right now,

and Chuseok is literally a mid-autumn festival.

So yeah. No Chuseok.

No, no! No!

Uh... But-but Jack will be gone by the fall!

[meekly] Hey!

And it'd be a travesty if he missed out

on this classic Korean holiday!

What's the harm in bumping it up a few weeks early?

Lily, Chuseok is about tradition.

We cannot change things around like that.

Exactly! [hushed] Stop.

We can cram it all into one day.

What's more important, really?

A silly old appointment?

Or family?

Hmm...

Uh, I don't know, Lily.

It's not tradition.

-Halmoni? No! -Yes!

[Jinsoo laughs on TV]

My life is now full because I'm spending Chuseok

with my family.

I'm glad that I didn't go to that hospital.

[all laughing]

[ghost] Thank you.

If we do this, we do it right.

Clear your schedule tomorrow.

We will prepare... for Summer Chuseok!

-[Min groans] -Yes!

I'll clear the calendar. Oh, no. Wait.

I had a dentist appointment, didn't I?

Do you know what you've done?!

Preparing Chuseok with your Halmoni is a nightmare!

You're not even supposed to mention it!

-You! You don't even know! -Somebody needs a time-out.

[chuckles] Mission accomplished.

-♪ dramatic drumbeat plays ♪ -[rooster crowing]

[Min speaking Korean]

Huh? Morning?

Don't we need sunlight to call it morning?

[in English] Why, it's the Summer Chuseok

you asked for, Lily!

[whistle blows]

Food prep begins now. We're already behind.

Eh. Should be a breeze

with the whole family helping out, right?

Say, where are Dad and Jack?

Chuseok!

Oh, they still went to the dentist.

I can't carry them through this important mission.

Come.

-[sighs] -[whistle blows]

[yawns] Could be worse.

Could be at the dentist.

[instrument clicking]

Well, I've seen enough. You're clear!

The pearliest of whites!

Yeah, well, he gets that from me.

The Wyldes have a long history of dental domination.

Well, why don't we take a peek at your premolars?

Ah. That won't be necessary, doc.

I-I have a flawless track record-- Oof!

It's okay, Dad, don't be nervous!

[nervously] What?

I'm not-- [grunts]

-♪ eerie music playing ♪ -Hmm...

[gasps] Janice? Clear my calendar.

[whimpers]

♪ dramatic drumbeat resumes ♪

Ya, ya, ya! What is this?

Songpyeon should look like half-moon.

Not messed-up baby face!

[grumbles]

Are we almost done yet?

-Yes. -Thank g--

With the pink one.

Still have green and white one to go!

[groans]

[groans] Do you have any idea how long it took me

to find a Korean pine in this town?

[sniffing]

-Acceptable. -[sighs]

Well, enjoy. If you need me, I'll be one with the couch.

There's no time for rest.

There's much more to do!

♪ tense electronic music playing ♪

Faster!

-Quicker! -[dramatic clang]

More efficient!

Decoration!

[grunting]

More food!

[inaudible]

♪ tense music continues ♪

[Lily whimpers weakly]

-[Lily sighs] -♪ music ends ♪

[tsking]

So weak.

[strains] I tried to warn you.

Why does Halmoni insist on everything being just so?

Can't you tell her to ease up a bit?

And face your grandmother's wrath?

-[grunts] No way. -[fire roars]

-[alarm beeping] -[Halmoni] Aigu!

Min-ju! Jeon is burning!

I'm coming!

-[gasps] -[dialing rapidly]

[Jack] Hello?

Jack! Get back here!

Halmoni is driving me crazy

with all this Chuseok stuff!

-[Will shrieking] -Wish I could, Lil.

Honestly, but...

-I think it's gonna be a while. -[drill whirs]

So... what have you guys been doing?

I heard Halmoni has a special way of making Songpye--

-Lily! There you are! -No! No!

Stop, Halmoni!

Stop! Stop!

Stop!

Perfect. Oh.

Except one more thing--

[shattering]

[echoing] Stop!

[birds squawking]

I'm drenched in sweat

and I can't feel my limbs anymore!

What do you mean?

I mean, I don't care about Chuseok!

I was just trying to get out of going to the dentist!

-Wha? -[Min] I knew it!

I knew it! I knew-- Whoa!

I knew it!

So it was a lie!

You're lying too, Mom!

Why don't you tell Halmoni

how you actually feel about Chuseok!

Oh, I-I like Chuseok just fine!

Except for the thankless work, the planning,

and not to mention the fact that it's summer!

But I like Chuseok just fine!

Is...

Is that how you feel?

Umma, I--

♪ tender music playing ♪

Okay.

Summer Chuseok is over.

Umma... Umma!

[sighs]

What a disaster.

[video game beeping]

[chomps loudly]

♪ soft music playing ♪

-[steam hisses] -[sighs]

♪ soft music continues ♪

[Lily and Min laughing]

♪ gentle piano music playing ♪

Whew!

Every Chuseok, my mother had to work so, so hard.

She was so strict about doing everything in traditional way.

It always had to be perfect.

I'm sorry I did same to you.

It's okay, Umma.

-I'm sorry too. -Me three.

But next year, I'm only cooking two dishes.

[chuckles] Fine.

Or Dad and Jack can help too.

Speaking of which, where are they?

-[banging] -[Will] Did we miss Chuseok?

-[Will grunts] -What I think Dad

was trying to say is,

did we miss Chuseok?

[babbling incoherently]

[gasps] You're right on time!

[gasps] Really?

♪ gentle music flourishes ♪

Ready?

♪ traditional music plays ♪

♪ music fades ♪

♪ gentle music playing ♪

Very nice, Min-ju.

A perfect half-moon.

Thanks, Umma.

I propose a toast.

To the first and best Summer Chuseok ever.

[all] To Chuseok!

[crack]

[spits]

♪ unnerving music plays ♪

Ow! This filling took out my filling!

Good thing I made a backup dentist appointment

for you tomorrow.

No!

♪ gentle music playing ♪

[car horns blaring]

Spot, spot, spot, spot... Spot!

-Easy, Will. -[sighs] Sorry, hon.

I just get so worked up when-- [screams] Reverse lights!

-Southeast corner! -[tires screeching]

Dad, watch out!

Son, I'm 43, don't tell me--

-[screaming] -[horn blaring]

[brakes screech]

Oh, no. What have I done?

-Are they mad? -I'm not sure.

They're just staring at us.

[chuckling] Hey, there!

Hope you guys are havin' one radical day!

[grunts]

Dad, what was that?

Being friendly, so they don't think I almost killed 'em.

-♪ dramatic sting ♪ -[gasps]

Well, howdy! I'm Tony Plover.

Landscape architect, dad, and loyal husband,

in no particular order. [laughs]

How 'bout you, stranger?

Will Wylde!

Pet groomer by trade,

kid-haver, and wife-lover by choice.

[chuckles] An absolute pleasure!

Y'all doin' some shopping?

[chuckles] Yeah.

Gotta stock up.

Oh, don't I know it!

[chuckles nervously] Well, we better get to it.

Hey, let's get lunch sometime, huh?

Sounds like a plan! Here's my digits!

Let's keep this fun train rollin'!

All I gotta say is...

all aboard!

Chugga-chugga-choo-choo!

One ticket to Tony Town, please!

Hey! He's handsome and funny?

Oh, what's that?

Oop! Hello?

What, is this the president?

Oh, you wanna talk to the funniest man in America?

Here ya go!

[forced groan]

[hearty laugh] I love it!

I'll catch ya on the flippity-flop, Willy.

Well, not if I see you first, Tonay!

[chuckles]

I don't even know who you are anymore.

[sighs] Well, at least I never had to admit

that I almost ran 'em over!

-Oh, look! A spot! -[tires screech]

♪ theme music playing ♪

♪♪ Me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Together, we can't lose ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you, me and you ♪♪ [echoes]

[light elevator music playing in store]

Oh, baby. That's it.

Who are you texting?

Just makin' lunch plans with Tony.

Will! You barely know this man!

Can't you just ignore it?

Yeah, but I don't wanna be rude.

I did almost obliterate him and his family.

One lunch couldn't hurt.

I don't like this, Dad.

If you don't turn this lunch into a friendship-ending event,

you could be stuck with Tony...

[in distorted voice] ...forever!

I'm a 41-year-old adult man, Lil.

I can handle one weird clingy guy.

[phone alert pings]

♪ uneasy music playing ♪

[continuous chimes pinging]

Look, I'll take care of this.

Okay, Will. Just one lunch, that's it.

-Ay! There he is! -[cat screeches]

Wild Will himself!

Tony Baloney!

Hey! Bring it in, huh?

How are you doing today... pal?

Ah, y'know, just waitin'

for my best friend in the whole world.

-[chuckles] -Uh, best friend, huh?

Um, actually, Tony, I need to talk to you about something.

Well, you're in luck

because today my cholesterol meds

and my IBS pills are interacting,

and now blinking gives me the dizzies.

[chuckles] So today is a no...

-blink... day. -[echoing scream]

Wow. S-So much personal info in one sentence.

You see, friendships,

they're like mannequins...

-[server hums fanfare] -Huh?

♪♪ Oh, happy birthday ♪♪

♪♪ So glad that you were born ♪♪

♪♪ A sammie on the house ♪♪

♪♪ I made with old meat ♪♪

♪♪ You've been warned ♪♪

[tooting]

Wait a minute. Today is your birthday?

And you're eating lunch with me?

Uh, birthday with my best bud!

Okay...

Wow! This is one bright sparkler.

Really wish I could blink right now!

[hissing]

What were you saying about mannequins?

Uh... [chuckles nervously]

♪ light music playing ♪

[laughs robotically]

[laughs robotically]

Dad. How'd you break it off?

Did you gift matching BFF necklaces

and then chuck your half into the sea?

Not exactly...

[cell phone pings]

Why did Bonnie Plover just text me,

"Hike today, girlfriend?"

And how did Pinky Plover get my number?

Ha! This is why I don't have a phone.

-[glass breaks] -Ow!

-[gasps] -A letter from Pinky?

-[both] Dad! -I'm sorry!

But the man doesn't blink!

It's like he's looking into your soul!

What?

Please, just tolerate them

for one friend date?

If you don't, things with Tony and me

could get even more awkward.

Now we all have friends we don't want.

These Plovers are a disease!

You'll only have Plover disease

until I can figure out how to let 'em down easy.

All you have to do is... survive.

[hard rock playing on boombox]

[panting]

So...

Um... you like hiking?

No.

[video games beeping]

[electronic squawking]

-[bell ringing] -Woo-hoo! I win!

Ugh! Stupid game!

I'm gonna play skee-ball now!

-Out of the way! -[crash]

[laughing maniacally]

-Jack, duck! -Duck? [grunts]

[nervously] Hi, everybody!

♪ tense music twang ♪

How was everyone's day?

This friendship with the Plovers needs to end now!

[lisping] My trademark grin is destroyed

because of those weirdos!

I got banned for a week from Hank N Beans!

Okay, okay, I hear you!

You want me to end it? 'Cause I'll do it!

I'm not scared.

[beep, line ringing]

[Tony] Chilly Willy!

Tonay!

I've got something to say.

Tony, I...

Hey! So, I...

uh, never don't...

want to...

not unsee your face...

again?

[Tony] Whoa. Will.

That's, uh, pretty crazy...

that you drop a quintuple negative like that! [laughs]

How 'bout dinner? Tonight? At your place?

[Min grumbles]

Hello?

Willy Vanilly?

Still good for dinner?

Yes?

Great! See you tonight, buddy!

I don't know who that was, but I don't like him.

Uh, gotta go!

-Oh no, you don't! -[yelps]

Nice job, Will!

I'm sorry, I'm just a 38-year-old man!

You invited them into our home!

We're gonna be trapped in here with their weirdness!

Oh, wait!

What if this is how we end the friendship?

Make them feel like they're trapped in here

with our weirdness!

But how can we, America's number one family,

possibly make anyone feel uncomfortable?

We gotta out-Plover the Plovers.

♪ electric guitar riff plays, fades ♪

[doorbell chimes]

Howdy howdy!

[barking wildly]

-[belches] -[heavy breathing]

Wassup!

DJ Tony's in the house!

Wassup, playa?

Just, uh, made us a casserole.

[chomping]

Hah-ey! Come on! Let's eat!

[snipping]

[heavy breathing]

Boy... [chuckles nervously]

You're all so different at home than you are in real life.

And your comfort in your own skin is so...

-so... -♪ dramatic music builds ♪

So inspiring!

I feel like we can really be ourselves around you.

[voices gasping, exclaiming]

Oh, I can't wait to see you in these extra-small onesies!

So true, honey!

[chuckles] I feel so free.

[hard rock playing on boombox]

This makes me wanna-- [screaming, laughing]

[exclaiming, screaming]

[laughing maniacally]

Okay, I'm out!

Bathroom calls!

[Tony] You know, we're having such a good time.

We ought to go on a big family trip together!

Right, honey?

What a great idea.

Ooh, how about a cruise?

Yeah! So there's no escape...

[echoing] From the fun!

Uh, bathroom break!

Big boy needs his dinner.

♪ intense music playing ♪

[in baby voice] Here it comes!

Tony!

Tony, I...

am also going bathroom!

[gasps, sighs]

Say! How many bathrooms does this place got?

One.

♪ gentle music playing ♪

[Jack] I can't do this anymore!

I'll throw myself overboard

before spending a day on that cruise.

-This can't be my life! -I'll join you.

Dad can live his life forever with the Plovers if he wants.

♪ gentle music swells ♪

Do it for your family, Will.

I think we can all fit in one room, right?

♪ dramatic music building ♪

[Will] No!

Plovers, we can't be friends!

-He did it! -We're free!

[Plovers cheering]

-I can feel joy again! -It's over!

Whoa, whoa. Why are you celebrating?

Because we don't have to be friends

with you freaks anymore!

-Woo-hoo! -Wait a minute.

You're the freaks!

Um, no. You're the one who honked at us!

-Wow, we have such a great life. -[horn blares]

[tires screech]

[chuckles] Hey there!

Hope you guys are havin' one radical day!

[grunts]

Dad, don't encourage that loud, strange man.

See, this is how you deal

with overly friendly weirdos, Pinky.

Be so clingy and annoying that they leave you alone.

You exchanged numbers?

I know, I know, I know.

But don't worry.

I've got a plan to creep him out at lunch.

-Did you do it? Is it over? -Not yet.

I just need to come on a little bit stronger.

And by "I" I mean... "you two."

-Ugh! -Dad!

Ugh! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

So, we were both too afraid of awkwardness

to end the friendship.

Huh.

Kinda funny, really. [chuckles]

[both laughing]

And to think it all started

because I nearly hit you with my car

going 40 miles an hour!

[neck cracks]

That's why you honked?

You were speeding in a parking lot?

You should be in prison! [groans]

You're just a sad

50-something-year-old man with anger issues!

[sobbing] Oh, who would do something so awful!

You're a monster!

There, there, sweetie.

Let's get you away from these horrible people!

I hope your feral son eats you in your sleep!

[rapid footsteps]

Well...

who wants ice cream?

[both] Oh yeah! Ice cream! Yum, yum, yum!

[rapid footsteps]

♪ soft music playing ♪

I'm sorry about the car thing.

Lunch next week, question mark?

[sent message notification pings]

[cell phone chimes]

[Will] Yes!

♪ ending theme playing ♪

♪♪ Me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Together we can't lose ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you, me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Together we can't lose ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you, me and you ♪♪