Original subtitles

[theme music playing]

♪♪ Me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Together, we can't lose ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you, me and you ♪♪ [echoes]

[video game beeping]

Sweet baby basilisks!

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on.

[beeping stops]

This better be good.

[chittering]

[screeches]

[inhales deeply]

Yeah, it's pretty good.

[video game beeping resumes]

-[clattering] -[Min grunting]

[grunts, sighs]

Oh, don't mind me.

Just taking out the trash

I told you to take out three days ago.

Pretty sure Lil was gonna do it.

Jack said he'd take it out.

Well, can someone at least get the door?

Gotta get to a save point.

You can pause anytime.

You're literally watching lizard videos.

-[clattering] -Ah. Uh-oh. No! No! Oh! Oh! Oh!

[beeping distorts]

You know, kids, your actions,

or rather inactions, have consequences.

I thought I told you two to bring in the mail!

-Jack was gonna do it. -[Will grumbles]

-Lil was-- -[Min grumbles]

Maybe we can sneak away.

[grumbles] I have waited for this magazine for a month!

Keep your children in line, William.

-[door slams] -[lock clicks]

Well, she's got a point.

This letter from the Small Business Inspection Bureau

is from a week ago.

Let me see that!

-"We are coming in one week." -[dramatic musical sting]

-One week ago... -Plus one week...

Carry the pi...

-[both] That's today! -[menacing musical sting]

-Jack did it. Jack did it. -Lil did it. Lil did it.

[sighs] Okay, okay, okay. We can do this.

The trailer is in perfect condition.

All regulations have been complied with.

We're good.

Hey, you're right.

-Electrical is on point. -[romantic music playing]

Ooh la la.

Animal accommodations are far beyond par.

So classically masculine!

-Plumbing is... -Plumbing is...

-[quack] -[music stops]

Plumbing is...

Please tell me you two unclogged the sink drain

like I asked you to?

-Hmm? -What the what now?

[Min] Sweet baby drain snakes!

Is it... alive?

[gurgling]

[roaring]

It's not so bad.

Yeah. We can handle a little--

-[roaring] -[Lily and Jack screaming]

[rattling, gurgling]

[both] Ah...

[squeaking, flatulence]

Did we do it?

[rumbling]

[splashing]

[squeaking]

-[jarring musical sting] -Lily, what did you do?

What did I do?

We're gonna fail the inspection all because you just had to--

Stop! You are both to blame.

[both] Sorry, Mom.

Yeah. Sorry, Mo--

Ahh... --in. Min!

[both giggling]

[Min grumbles]

We are not gonna fail that inspection.

-You wanna know why? -[all] Yeah.

-[uplifting music playing] -[Min] Because this is a P.73,

the most basic pipe of all time.

-Awesome! -[Min] Jack!

You are coming with me to the hardware store

-to get a new one. -Aw, man.

Haha! Stinks to be--

[Min] Lily, you stay here and help your dad

-clean this place up. -[grumbles]

[Min] And you!

Never call-- Pfft.

[laughs] Never call me Mom again, you weirdo.

[funky music playing]

[Min] And there it is!

Mission accomplished.

Nothing can stop us--

[Mr. Chippie] No, please, I beg you.

This hardware store has been in my family for generations.

[pen clicks]

-[menacing music plays] -I cannot, in good conscience,

allow this establishment to remain open.

Hex bolts were found mixed in with the lag bolts.

-Osha, show him. -[barks, growls]

Dangerously disorganized.

Shutting you guys down for good.

[cries]

-Well, our work here is done. -[barks]

Next up, the Wylde Pak Groom and Board.

[both gasp]

Heh heh.

Uh, keep the, um, change.

[sobbing]

[gasping dramatically]

Hmm. [gasps]

Show him, Osha. This will be a teaching moment.

If only I'd plunged that sink when you asked me.

They're gonna shut down the Groom and Board,

and it's all my--

Now, Jack, don't beat yourself up about it.

Do it later when we have time. We need to get this pipe home

-before she gets there. -[gasps]

Huh? Wrap it up, Osha.

We're on the clock.

-[phone ringing] -[screaming]

-Speaking of... -[phone beeps]

Hey, hon, we're on our way with the pipe.

Everything okay there?

Sure.

If you consider pulling up all the flooring okay.

[Min] You what?!

Yeah. There was some spillage,

and, thanks to the overflow in the backed up sink,

we found mold.

[chuckles weakly, grunts]

[Min] Well, we just ran into the inspector,

and she's on her way to you. Now!

Uhh! Buy me some time.

-Gotta go. Bye. -[phone beeps]

Lil, status report. [grunts]

This one plank is really stuck.

Like something is holding onto--

[growling]

-[skunk growling] -[Lily breathing shakily]

[gulps]

What is going on over there?

[spraying]

-[screaming] -[skunk screeching]

-[thudding] -[Will and Lily screaming]

Well, off to do the people's work.

-We need more time! -I got an idea.

If you distract the inspector, I'll slow her down.

What are you... What are you gonna do?

Min, it's better that you don't know.

Yeah. All right.

Oh, hey, excuse me, miss.

I was... I was wondering what your thoughts were

on biological hazards and psychological hazards,

and are they evaluated on the same scale?

Hmm, interesting question,

and one that our organization itself

has spent years analyzing.

Their system is simple, a bit reductive--

Oh, I just remembered.

I-I've got a thing that I need to go... to.

-Did you do it? -[Jack] Yeah.

That car isn't going anywhere.

[motorcycle engine revving]

[Min and Jack] Oh!

Well, at least they can't take my car away.

[car engine sputters, dies]

[Mr. Chippie wails]

[engine roaring]

[tense music playing]

We can send Mr. Chippie a tow truck, right?

Yeah, that'll make his day.

-[phone ringing, beeps] -[Will] The good news is

I've almost fixed the electrical issue.

-Wait. What elec-- -Bad news is

I can't seem to shut off the sprinkler system.

Hope you were able to buy us some time.

-Still on it. -[phone beeps]

[Jack screams]

Ugh. Running behind schedule.

Better pick up the pace. Ha!

[engine revving]

[tires screeching]

[Jack screaming]

She's too fast.

Didn't wanna have to do this.

-We gotta slow her down somehow. -[phone ringing]

-[indistinct voice on phone] -Hey, Chuck.

You still got some of that, uh, stolen construction equipment.

Ugh. Unscheduled stop.

-[horns honking] -Everyone remain where you are.

We got, uh, holes to dig

or fill, or something. I don't know.

Haha! That stopped her.

You guys hear that over there?

Yeah! Now, all we need is that new pipe.

-[dinging] -And we'll be all set.

At this rate, we should beat her home, no problem.

-[phone beeps] -Uh. Maybe not.

Hey, lady, what are you doing?

Hey, you gotta-- No, you gotta stop. Lady, hey!

Ugh! She made it through.

Okay, we're gonna have to turn the back roads into a shortcut.

[upbeat rock music playing]

[tires screeching]

[thudding]

[tires screeching]

[engine rumbling]

[tires screeching]

[both laughing]

[tires screeching]

Oh, no. We're too late.

No! I can't be the one

responsible for destroying the family business.

Even if it was entirely Lily's fault.

-I know what I have to do. -Jack!

-[rousing music playing] -[exclaims]

-Huh? -[yelps, growls]

Oh. Sounds like someone's coming.

-[Osha barking] -[Jack] Nice doggy. Nice doggy.

-[Jack exclaiming] -[Osha barking, growling]

-[thumping] -[Jack grunting]

Take the pipe. Save the Groom and Board!

-[electricity crackling] -[door creaks open]

Apologies for my tardiness.

I had an unexpected detour with a strange child

who made threatening advances toward my canine coworker.

Uh... Is the kid okay?

-He'll live. -[ambulance siren wailing]

Remember me! [echoing]

Shall we begin?

Uh, sure.

As you can see, the Wylde Pak Groom and Board--

Do not interfere with my methods.

So intimidating.

Linens appear to be clean.

Freshly washed this morning.

Come on, Lily. You can do this.

-Evidence of feline frivolity. -[barks]

[Lily] Connect the pipe.

Dalmatian fire extinguisher.

[fire extinguisher barks]

[inspector] How whimsical.

[Lily] Tighten the thingy.

-Notes of anxiety. -[Will whimpering]

Haha! Perfect fit!

Now, I just gotta hook up the other side, and-- Huh?!

[gasps] It's too short!

I thought the P.73 was the most basic pipe of all time.

[chuckles] Oopsie!

I guess proper organization is important.

I deserved everything. [echoing]

And electrical seems to be functioning.

I guess all that's left now is...

the sink.

I should have known it would come to this.

Yeah. It's a pretty standard part of the inspection.

Fine. Let's just get it over with.

If anyone's listening down there, I'm sorry.

[panting] What do I do?

[muttering] Ah!

-[chomp] -[water gurgling]

What? It's draining.

Did you expect something else?

Um... [laughs]

No way!

This sink is t-t-top-of-the-line,

never-broken, always works.

[menacing musical sting]

Uh... See? Look. I can make it super icy.

[tense music playing]

Ooh! Super hotty.

[pen clicks]

Icy! Hotty! Icy! Hotty!

-[Osha barking] -Sir, the inspection is over.

-You have been judged. -[groans]

Come on, Osha.

Please, don't judge us until you--

[gasps]

-We passed! -[uplifting music playing]

Thank you, Inspector!

Don't thank me.

I'm just a civil servant using non-violent action

to protect the innocent from incompetence.

-Tax the rich! -[motorcycle engine revs]

What a cool lady!

-Did we do it? -Yep.

[Lily screaming, gurgling]

What's that weird gurgling sound?

[Lily whimpering]

[clock ticking]

[video game beeping]

-[Lily breathing heavily] -[upbeat music playing]

Those kids really gave it everything they had today.

You hear that, you two?

You done good.

-Jack did it. -Lil did it.

-Definitely Jack. -Pretty sure it was Lily.

-Whatever, man. -[mockingly] Whatever, man.

Whatever, whatever, man.

[theme music playing]

♪♪ Me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Together, we can't lose ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you, me and you ♪♪ [echoes]

[upbeat music playing]

Ugh, gosh.

That one cashier always gives me the stink-eye.

Hon, we did self-checkout.

Hey, here's a flyer, scrunt.

Huh?

"Theater camp by Chuck."

"For theater via kids."

-Chuck's doing theater? -Ain't no way.

This has to be a classic Chuck scheme.

Reminds me of the Man2Marry fiasco.

Canyon Valley 10 here. Come and get it.

-[funky music playing on radio] -[scatting]

Or that time he tried to make kombucha out of creek sludge.

All right, we get it. Look, small businesses struggle.

But this is a good cause.

Our local community theater is in bad shape,

and ya boy is gonna save it.

We have a community theater?

Not if that foundation caves in.

So for just $49.99, your kids can participate

in the greatest show ever produced,

the one and only Camp Chuck.

I'd say I'm interested.

Oh, why thank you, kind stranger.

Chuck schemes are top Canyon Valley entertainment.

To witness the birth and the death of a Chuck mess-around

would be... fascinating.

Mom, can we go?

I don't know.

Chuck isn't the most responsible guy.

What kind of parents would we be if we just let some--

It's also a sleep-away,

so your kids will be away from home for the weekend.

-[door slams] -Bye, kids!

[tires screech]

[adventurous music playing]

Oooh, this is gonna be good!

[sniffs]

Ah, the sweet aroma

of another Chuck master scam.

-[coughing] -[gags]

[squeaking]

Who'd wanna save this dump anyways?

Exactly! We shall revel in the chaos.

Huh? Halmoni? Why are you here?

Halmoni is great stage actor in Korea.

I train in Pansori and Talchum.

I also need weekend away from Min and Will.

Tap, tap, tap. Beep, beep, beep.

All right, I want you all up onstage. Come on.

You are now artistes.

You get to write, direct, and star

in the performance of your choosing,

which will debut tomorrow at the...

Dun-dun-dun-dun.

-Oh. [grunts] -[clanks]

...first annual "Camp Chuck Saves the Theater:

A Variety Cabaret."

Aw, man!

[both laughing]

But, Chuck, we don't know how to sing.

And I don't know how to... [exerting]

...dance.

Don't worry about it. You'll learn.

Hey, check this out.

[grunting] Ow!

All right, show me what ya got.

[chuckles] More like "show me your wallet."

Whoa! Hey, this guy's funny.

[drumming]

[bright, playful music playing]

[smooches]

[Chuck] Aw, yes! Love the emotion.

-[chanting] -[babbling]

[all vocalizing]

[slurps]

Nice work!

I wanna be a cat.

[slurps] Meow!

Oh, this kitty's got claws. Reow!

[beeping]

[drumming]

[drumming]

[grunts] You don't solo!

I solo!

[snoring]

Oh. Oh. Huh? What?

Oh, that's showbiz, baby!

Aye, nice racket ya got here, Chuck-O.

I don't know what you're talking about, girl Jack.

This is a serious artistic endeavor.

-[clattering] -[Dirk] Aw, rats!

[exclaiming]

[screams]

Dirk! Don't go into the light, buddy.

Yeesh! Chuck is really on his A game.

Word. [stomach grumbles]

I wonder if there's any real food around here.

[jazz music playing]

Whoa!

This must be where the actors live.

Food!

Ugh. More old tuna.

[squeaks]

What's all this writing on these posters?

"Chuck. Les Depressed. '07."

Chuck?

As in... Chuck?

Huh. Let's see.

Fiddler on the Hoof.

The Sound of Mucus.

Sweety Todd: The Kind Barber of Neat Street.

-Chuck was... -[both] ...a theater kid?

-[light thuds on] -Caught me!

So this is not a scheme?

Chuck really cares about this theater?

It's doomed at this rate,

and we just sat back and watched.

Right? But, like, what can we do?

Exactly. We can't just take over the show.

And do the opposite of what Chuck does.

-[ding] -[both gasp]

-[both] Uh, yeah we can! -[rock guitar riff plays]

[applauding]

Ahhh!

[hissing]

Listen up, you hooligans.

I'm getting real sick

of the lack of commitment around here.

This hogwash isn't gonna cut it.

But Chuck said to--

-Do we look like Chuck? -[menacing musical sting]

Now, make me feel something!

[drumming]

Faster! Come on!

I know babies who drum better than that!

Are you a little baby? Are you?

One, and two, and three, and four,

and move your feet, Beef. Move those feet.

And one, and two, and move those feet.

[all laughing]

-[Lily shouts] -[all scream]

[screams]

I don't have room on my stage for slackers.

Show me some movement.

It's just a concussion.

I'll be-- Ooh!

[grunting]

I thought you had legs, Finn!

Kick high, dang it!

[whimpering]

You call yourself a cat?

You haven't even hacked up a single hairball.

Hey, kids, can we talk in the greenroom?

Artistic directors' chat.

Sure thing, Chuck.

-[whimpering] -And, Lawrence,

there better be poop in this litter box

when I get back.

[straining]

Kids, I-I love your passion for the craft.

Don't get me wrong.

But you're scaring the children and grandmother.

Chuck, we're just trying

to balance your... laid-back approach.

'Cause... it's not working.

Yeah, you can be honest.

We know you're a... [whispers] theater kid.

And we accept you.

Whoa, whoa. Y-you got it all wrong.

Then explain this,

-you thespian. -[dramatic musical sting]

No, no, no, no.

Uh... Er, I... I-I mean yes, I love theater.

But you can't force creativity.

I want the kids to express themselves

without worrying about being good.

But then they'll be... [gulps] bad.

All right, hold up. Let me explain.

Theater arts was my life.

-[upbeat music playing] -[Chuck] My soul. My calling.

No matter what part I played,

I never felt more alive

than when I was onstage.

But then came Mr. A.

[Mr. A grumbles]

[Chuck] Anything less than perfect was tossed out.

Oh, man!

[Chuck] He crushed my artistic spirit.

[Mr. A clears throat]

[Chuck] Made this palace of art a pit of misery.

[Mr. A] Ugh.

Oh, man!

I told ya. I love this theater.

I'm giving these kids the chance I never had

before they give up on their dream...

like me.

[sniffling]

So the show might suck, and that's okay?

I'm struggling here.

I think he's saying it's more important

everyone has fun

and gets to, like, do their weird art.

And I already got enough parents' cash

to save the theater.

I mean, at this point, we could fake the whole show

and just run off with their money, right?

Oh! See, Chuck, saying that

really makes you sound like a scammer.

Oh, fo' sho'.

All right, "Camp Chuck" on three.

-One... -Two...

Three!

[indistinct chatter]

Okay, everyone, places in five.

Wait. What are we gonna do?

Yeah. We didn't rehearse anything.

Oh, I know what you could perform.

And no rehearsal necessary.

Oh, this is gonna be good.

Whew! That's a relief.

I wonder what it is.

Lily, the box you asked for.

Ugh. What's that smell?

[munching]

[squeaks]

I still don't get how this show is gonna save the theater.

Oh, I hope the kids wear little hats.

[light thuds on]

Thank you everyone for supporting

the "Camp Chuck Saves The Theater Variety Cabaret!"

I'd like to get things started

with a slam poetry reading by my good friend Dirk.

[percussive music playing]

Rats in my bed.

Rats in my head.

Heading to work.

Working all day.

B, C, D, E, F,

Gee-nie in a bottle.

Three wishes.

No more rats.

No more rats.

No more... rats!

[music ends]

[tepid applause]

[man coughs]

[upbeat music playing]

[all vocalizing]

[jazz music playing]

It is I, Crimson, the Highway Kitty.

-[audience laughs and applauds] -[meowing]

And I'm a naughty cat,

who loves to hack up hairballs.

-[hacking] -[audience groans in disgust]

-Hi, my name's Chippy Marshall. -Hyah!

I'm here to talk about chickens. Chickens go--

Allow me to share with you

the power of the human quad.

-[slapping] -[audience applauds]

And to help me, I have volunteers,

Jack and Lil.

[both laugh nervously]

[thudding]

[shouting]

-[Jack and Lily screaming] -[thudding]

-[crunching] -[audience groans]

[shutter clicks]

[singing in Korean]

So beautiful!

[upbeat music playing]

That's all, folks.

[music ends]

[man coughs]

-[upbeat music playing] -[audience applauding]

[cheering and applauding]

[sniffles] Wow, man.

[light music playing]

[laughing]

So, would you wanna maybe hang out next week?

Aw, you're cute, Finn.

But this was strictly a showmance for me.

Aww.

Oh, my gosh! Kids!

That was incredible.

And your stage combat looked so real!

-[ding] -Congrats, Chuck.

We did it your way, and the theater is saved.

I know, right? I'll never desert you, old gal.

[rumbling]

Chuck, are you okay?

Aw. Welp. [grunts] Back to basics.

-[funky music playing] -Hot single alert!

Canyon Valley 10 back on the market.

[scatting]

[Jack and Lily laughing and scatting]

[theme music playing]

♪♪ Me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Together, we can't lose ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you, me and you ♪♪ [echoes]

♪♪ Me and you ♪♪

♪♪ Together, we can't lose ♪♪

♪♪ Me and you, me and you ♪♪ [echoes]