All language subtitles for The.Real.Housewives.Of.Beverly.Hills.S02E22.WEBRip.x264-ION10.en

- TONIGHT...

- REOW!
[laughs]

- IT'S PART TWO

OF THE REAL HOUSEWIVES
OF BEVERLY HILLS REUNION.

- WHEN I GET TO
MY BREAKING POINT, I FIGHT BACK.

- IF I WANT TO SAY ANYTHING,
I WILL SAY IT TO THEIR FACE.

- THAT'S NOT NICE.

WHY WOULD YOU
TELL HER THAT?

- YOUR JAW WAS POPPED
OUT OF ITS SOCKET,

- OVER A TOILET.

- "KYLE'S A C-U-[bleep]-T."

THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO
GO TO SOMEBODY ELSE,

AND GOES TO ME BY ACCIDENT,
ABOUT ME.

- SHE COMPLETELY
THREW ME UNDER THE BUS.

- YOU SAID, "LISA PHONED ME AND
SAID 'TAYLOR IS NOT MY FRIEND.'"

- NO.
OH, I--THAT'S A LIE.

- I WAS BEING BULLIED IN A ROOM
AND I HAD NO FRIENDS.

- AND YOU SAID,
"I WILL KILL YOU," TWO TIMES?

- OH, [bleep] OFF.

- WHEN'S THE BOOK COME OUT,
ANYWAY?

IT'S BEEN, LIKE,
A HOT MINUTE.

- THIS IS NONE OF
YOUR BUSINESS, OKAY?

- YOU MAKE IT
THE WORLD'S BUSINESS.

- YOU'RE
WAY OUT OF YOUR PLACE.

NO, OUT OF LINE.
- NO, YOU ARE.

- YOU ARE ANGRY SPICE.

- BRANDI,
WHAT WAS HARDER,

NAVIGATING AROUND BEVERLY HILLS
IN CRUTCHES,

OR JOINING
THIS GROUP OF WOMEN?

- I THINK
THAT THIS GROUP OF WOMEN

IS PROBABLY THE HARDEST
TO GET ALONG WITH IN TOWN.

IT'S DEFINITELY BEEN
FUN AND ENTERTAINING,

BUT ALSO
REALLY, REALLY DIFFICULT.

- WELL, BRANDI HOBBLED ONTO
THE SCENE WITH CRUTCHES, NO BRA,

ONE HIGH HEEL
AND NO FILTER.

- WHOO! WHOO!
- SINCE THEN, BEVERLY HILLS

HASN'T BEEN THE SAME.
TAKE A LOOK.

- WHO'S THAT?
- I DON'T KNOW, SHE'S TALL.

- IN BEVERLY HILLS,
YOUNGER AND PRETTIER WOMEN

ARE OFTEN MET WITH HOSTILITY
AND JEALOUSY.

- IT'S A WEDGE-BUT-NO-BRA
PARTY.

[laughter]

- FOR GOD'S SAKE.
[laughter]

CAN SHE NOT RAM THAT BIKINI
A LITTLE FURTHER UP HER ASS?

I MEAN, SERIOUSLY.
- [laughs]

BLOODY HELL.

THAT RIGHT NIPPLE'S
ABOUT TO POP OUT.

BRANDI IS DRUNK
AND SHE'S ON XANAX.

- ALL THE XANAX
JUST KICKED IN...

AND I CAN BARELY PUT
A SENTENCE TOGETHER. IT'S GREAT.

- AND SHE'S ALL OVER
MY HUSBAND.

BACK OFF.
GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY HUSBAND.

DO I HAVE TO
COME OVER THERE?

- AS THEY COME
OUT OF THE WATER,

AND HE'S GETTING NAKED.

[laughs]

AWESOME.
[laughs]

- CAN YOU NOT AT LEAST
GO UP AND SAY,

"YOU DON'T WHIP OUT YOUR PENIS
AT A PARTY

AND PEE ON THE GRASS."

- I COULD TELL YOU
WHAT HER PROBLEM IS.

SHE HAS NO FILTER.

SHE JUST SAYS
WHAT SHE WANTS TO SAY.

- COCK.

- OHH! WOW.

- I JUST FIND HER
TO BE TACKY.

- DID YOU SOOTHE THE BATON?

[laughter]

- YOU GET WHAT YOU GIVE IN LIFE,
AND YOU GIVE OFF,

LIKE, BITCHINESS,
YOU'RE GETTING IT BACK.

- LET'S HAVE A MOMENT OF SILENCE
FOR HER TRIPPING ON A HIGH HEEL.

[laughter]

AND I'M PRETTY GOOD
AT BEING A BITCH. [laughs]

BRING IT, BITCH.

- ARE YOU CALLING ME
A BITCH?

- OKAY,
YOU'RE A BITCH.

- YOU HAVE NO CLUE
WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

- YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU ARE A GODDAMN BITCH.

- WATCH YOUR MOUTH.

- AT LEAST I DON'T
DO CRYSTAL METH IN THE BATHROOM

ALL NIGHT LONG, BITCH.

- THIS HAS GONE TOO FAR.

- I WILL [bleep] KILL YOU!

- DO NOT PUT
YOUR [bleep] FINGER

IN MY FACE.
- OH, PLEASE.

- YOU'RE GONNA GET MY [bleep]
FINGER IN YOUR FACE, TOO.

- LISTEN, LISTEN,
LISTEN, LISTEN!

- REALLY?
- NO, NO! STOP IT!

- OKAY, ENOUGH!
- YOU'RE A SLUT PIG.

- COLOR ME SLUT.

- OKAY, SO YOU CALL YOURSELF
A SLUT READILY.

IS THAT A DEFENSE MECHANISM,
OR...

- UM...

I HEARD SOME OF THE GOSSIP
GOING IN,

TO WHAT THE LADIES WERE SAYING
ABOUT THE WAY I DRESSED,

AND WHAT THEY WERE SAYING,
BECAUSE I WAS SINGLE

AND I TALK ABOUT DATING
AND I TALK ABOUT SEX,

AND THERE WAS WHISPERS,
AND, YOU KNOW,

I REALLY DON'T CARE.
I'M NOT A SLUT.

I MEAN, LIKE I SAID,
I WISH I WAS, 'CAUSE SEX IS FUN,

BUT YOU KNOW,
I JOKE AROUND A LOT, SO...

- UM, CAMILLE,
WHAT DID YOU THINK

OF BRANDI
CALLING HERSELF A SLUT?

- I THINK SHE'S A RIOT.

I THINK IT'S FUNNY, AND I THINK
IT'S VERY SELF-DEPRECATING,

AND I DON'T THINK
SHE BELIEVES SHE'S A SLUT.

- SO WE GOT A LOT OF EMAILS
ABOUT YOUR BIKINI IN HAWAII.

- OH, WHAT BIKINI?
- I KNOW, RIGHT? WHICH ONE?

- IT WAS NON-EXISTENT.
- AND SO, YOU KNOW--

- LACK OF. [laughs]

- LOUELLA FROM DAPHNE,
ALABAMA SAID,

"BRANDI, IN HAWAII,
WHY DID YOU FEEL THE NEED

TO BE SO EXPOSED IN FRONT OF
A GROUP OF MARRIED MEN?"

- OH, THERE--
WHO WAS MARRIED?

MAURICIO AND KEN?
- UH, MY HUSBAND.

- TWO--TWO MEN.
- EXACTLY.

- WHO ELSE--
OH, PAUL WAS THERE, BUT--

- RIGHT. [laughs]
- BUT IT--

WELL, SHE'S USED TO
WALKING AROUND NAKED.

- EXCEPT THAT'S A QUESTION MARK
RIGHT THERE. IT'S A JOKE.

- NO, IT'S NOT A QUESTION MARK.
WE'RE MARRIED, YEAH.

- SHE'S USED TO
WALKING AROUND NAKED.

- I'M JOKING.

- WHEN YOU'RE GOING
ON A TRIP

WITH GIRLFRIENDS
AND THEIR HUSBANDS,

IS IT COOL
TO HAVE YOUR ASS OUT?

- UH, THAT'S ME IN GENERAL,

AND I'M NOT GONNA CHANGE MYSELF
FOR ANYONE.

MY BATHING SUITS HAVE BEEN
THE SAME SINCE FOREVER.

- DID YOU LADIES--
- SINCE SHE'S TWO YEARS OLD.

[laughter]

- I WAS 25, UH, IT'S LEGAL.
- NO, NO, HONESTLY,

ALL MY BATHING SUITS
HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TINY,

ALL MY GIRLFRIENDS WEAR
THE SAME TINY BATHING SUITS.

THIS IS A NEW WORLD WITH THESE
LADIES AND THEIR ONE-PIECES

AND COVER-UPS.
- NO, IN EUROPE

IT'S MORE LIKE THAT.
YOU WEAR SOMETHING THAT BIG.

- WELL, USUALLY--
THEY'RE LUCKY I HAD A TOP ON.

- SO BRANDI, LOOKING BACK,
WOULD YOU HAVE HANDLED YOURSELF

ANY DIFFERENTLY
THIS SEASON?

- UM, YEAH, I MEAN,
I HAVE REGRETS, FOR SURE,

BUT YOU CAN'T TAKE IT BACK, SO--
YOU KNOW, DO I WISH I HADN'T

TAKEN A XANAX AND GOTTEN ON
A FLIGHT AND BEEN ON CAMERA?

YES. I WAS MORTIFIED
WHEN I SAW THAT EPISODE,

BUT YOU CAN'T TAKE IT BACK,
AND YOU JUST HAVE TO OWN IT

AND KEEP ON MOVING.

- VERY GOOD.

- ROSA FROM MONTGOMERY,
ALABAMA, SAYS,

"KYLE, YOU'RE MY FAVORITE,
BUT I SAW AN UGLY SIDE TO YOU

"AT YOUR CHARITY EVENT.

WHY WERE YOU INITIALLY SO CATTY
TOWARDS BRANDI?"

- THE FACT THE SHE WAS
SORT OF LIKE, YOU KNOW,

COMING INTO THE GROUP,
INTO THE SHOW,

I JUST KIND OF HAD
MY GUARD UP, SCARED.

SO I WAS VERY DEFENSIVE
AND JUST RIDICULOUS.

- OKAY, WELL,
I WANT TO RUN THROUGH

A FEW DIFFERENT EMAILS
ABOUT GAME NIGHT, OKAY?

CAROL FROM SILVER SPRINGS,
MARYLAND SAID,

"KYLE, I GET THAT YOU'RE
PROTECTIVE OF YOUR SISTER,

BUT MY ADMIRATION WAS SHOT DOWN
AT GAME NIGHT."

- JED FROM NEW YORK CITY SAID,
"YOU BROUGHT A WHOLE NEW MEANING

TO THE PHRASE, 'MEAN GIRL.'"

WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THOSE

WHO CALLED YOU A MEAN GIRL
THAT NIGHT?

- I AGREE.
- YOU DO?

- YES, ABSOLUTELY.

LIKE I SAID, I WASN'T EVEN
GIVING HER A CHANCE,

AND THEN AT GAME NIGHT,
I WENT TO THE OTHER ROOM,

AND ONE OF THE GIRLS
CAME UP TO ME AND SAID

THAT BRANDI HAD SAID SOMETHING
ABOUT MY SISTER BEING ON DRUGS,

AND THAT--TO ME, I WAS LIKE,
[snaps fingers] "DONE."

AND I WAS
ALREADY VERY STRESSED OUT

WITH MY SISTER
AT THAT TIME.

I WAS VERY, VERY ON EDGE
ANY TIME

MY SISTER AND I
WERE TOGETHER,

SO THE WHOLE EVENING
WAS A DISASTER,

AND I FELT VERY BADLY
ABOUT THAT, AND--

- DUKE FROM BOWLING GREEN,
KENTUCKY, SAYS,

"BRANDI,
YOU WEREN'T INNOCENT.

"YOU ACTUALLY
THREATENED TO KILL KYLE.

"DO YOU TAKE ANY BLAME
FOR GAME NIGHT

TURNING INTO
A FLAMING BALL OF HATE?"

- YEAH, ABSOLUTELY, I DO.
I TAKE, YOU KNOW,

I TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
FOR LOSING MY TEMPER,

BUT, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN
ONLY BE PUSHED SO FAR,

AND I FELT LIKE
I WAS BEING BULLIED IN A ROOM,

AND I HAD NO FRIENDS,
AND IT JUST CONTINUED

AND CONTINUED, AND EVERYONE HAS
A BREAKING POINT,

AND WHEN I GET TO
MY BREAKING POINT, I FIGHT BACK.

- DID YOU CROSS THE LINE
WHEN YOU ACCUSED KIM

OF BEING ON CRYSTAL METH?

- DO I REGRET SAYING THAT
SPECIFICALLY?

YES, BUT THE TRUTH IS,
SHE WAS ON SOMETHING,

AND SHE WAS IN AND OUT
OF THE BATHROOM ALL NIGHT,

AND SHE'S IN REHAB NOW,
SO CLEARLY I WASN'T WRONG.

- DO YOU THINK--
- WELL, YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT

WHAT IT WAS, AND THAT WAS
A VERY SERIOUS ACCUSATION,

WHICH IS WHY
I GOT SO DEFENSIVE,

BECAUSE I KNOW THAT
ONCE YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT

IN FRONT OF THE CAMERAS,
IT'S GONNA FOLLOW YOU.

- RHONDA FROM
BREMERTON, WASHINGTON SAID,

"KYLE, CONSIDERING
THAT KIM IS IN REHAB NOW,

DO YOU OWE BRANDI
AN APOLOGY?"

- OH, I APOLOGIZED TO BRANDI
A LONG TIME AGO,

BUT NOTHING TO DO WITH
MY SISTER BEING IN REHAB.

- IT WAS A DARK WEEKEND,
AND AFTER THE FACT,

I GOT A LONG TEXT FROM KYLE,
AND I OWNED UP TO MY PART,

BUT THEN
I WASN'T FEELING LIKE

THEY WERE ACCEPTING
ANY RESPONSIBILITY,

LIKE, FOR A LONG TIME.
LIKE, YOU WERE LIKE,

"BUT YOU WERE THE ONE
THAT DID SOMETHING WRONG."

AND NOW,
AFTER YOU'VE SEEN IT BACK,

YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE JUST AS--
- WE ALL FELT BAD ABOUT IT,

'CAUSE I BACKED KYLE,
BECAUSE SHE'S MY FRIEND.

I DIDN'T KNOW BRANDI.
- LISA CALLED ME

AND APOLOGIZED
FOR WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT ME.

- I DIDN'T KNOW, AND I--

- RIGHT, SO THEN
WHEN YOU SAW THE SHOW, YOU--

- I WAS MORTIFIED, YEAH,
AND I SAID THAT.

I STOOD BEHIND KYLE
AND I BACKED HER,

JUST AS A GOOD FRIEND, YOU KNOW,
BACKING SOMEBODY UP,

THAT'S WHAT YOU DO,

BUT THEN WHEN I SAW IT
PLAYED BACK,

I REALIZED THAT IT REALLY WASN'T
HOW IT HAD BEEN EXPLAINED TO ME.

- BRANDI, IN YOUR BRAVO BLOG
YOU SAID THAT,

"I GREW UP WITH PARENTS
THAT TAUGHT ME

"THAT BULLYING
IS AN INDEFENSIBLE CRIME.

I GUESS THEY DON'T TEACH THAT
TO CHILD STARS."

- [scoffs]
- DO YOU THINK KIM AND KYLE...

- REOW!
[laughs]

- WERE BULLIES?

- YEAH, YOU KNOW, I DO.
- WOW.

- I HAVE NEVER TREATED ANYONE
LIKE THAT IN MY LIFE,

AND MY PARENTS TAUGHT ME
TO LOVE EVERYONE EQUALLY,

AND TO GIVE EVERYONE
A FAIR CHANCE.

I THINK SHE WAS
ON THE DEFENSE,

'CAUSE SHE THOUGHT
I WAS SOMETHING I WASN'T.

WE'VE GOTTEN PAST IT,

BUT I WOULD NEVER
DO THAT TO ANYONE.

- BUT I THINK ALSO, LIKE,
SHE WAS ON THE DEFENSE,

AND THEN YOU GOT ON THE DEFENSE
AND YOU SAID, "I WILL KILL YOU."

TWO TIMES? I MEAN...
- BUT--YEAH, I KNOW.

I'M SURE THAT'S--
THAT WASN'T YOUR PARENTS'--

- YOU SAID, "BRING IT ON,
BITCH," FIRST, DID YOU NOT

SAY, "BRING IT ON, BITCH?"
- YEAH, I SAID, "BRING IT,"

AND THEN--YEAH--
YEAH, OH, GOSH.

IT WAS A ROOM AGAINST ME,
SO IF YOU GUYS--

I'M IN A CAST,
SITTING IN A CHAIR.

YOU'RE IN MY FACE?
I'M GONNA KNOCK YOU OUT.

IT'S THAT SIMPLE.
[laughter]

- ARE YOU A FIGHTER?
- I'M SURE YOU WOULD.

- NO, BUT I FEEL
LIKE I COULD BE.

- EXACTLY, SO WHEN
SHE'S PROTECTING KIM,

BECAUSE KIM HAS
A REAL DISEASE,

AND SHE'S PROTECTING HER,
HER ADRENALINE'S PUMPING, TOO,

SO SHE'S SAYING THINGS
SHE DOESN'T MEAN,

- YEAH, BUT THEY RAN OVER
TO WHERE I WAS.

- BUT "I WILL KILL YOU?
I WILL KILL YOU.

I WILL TAKE YOUR LIFE
AWAY FROM YOU?"

THAT'S PRETTY HARSH, TOO,
SO I'M JUST SAYING,

IF YOU'RE GONNA SAY THE MESSAGES
THAT YOUR PARENTS TAUGHT YOU,

I'M PRETTY SURE THAT WAS
PROBABLY ONE OF THEM, TOO.

- RIGHT.
OKAY, TAYLOR.

- IT WAS A FIGURE OF SPEECH,
GOING BACK TO THAT.

"I WILL EFFING KILL YOU."

AND THAT WAS LIKE--
- IS THAT A FIGURE OF SPEECH?

- NO, NO, BUT IT WAS LIKE
A KIND OF--

- DO YOU REALLY THINK
I MEANT IT?

- AS IT WENT LIKE THAT,
IT WASN'T KIND OF

A CALCULATED--
- RIGHT.

WE ALL SAW IT.
- RIGHT, I GET IT.

- YOU KNOW, IT WAS JUST LIKE,
AHH! THAT'S IT.

- SO TALK TO ME ABOUT
HIDING THE CRUTCH.

- I DIDN'T DO THAT. THIS IS
WHAT'S INTERESTING ABOUT THAT,

I DID NOT DO THAT.
- KIM HID THE CRUTCH.

- AND THE TRUTH IS,
SHE CAME TO ME AND SAID LATER,

"I'M JUST KIDDING,
IT'S RIGHT BEHIND HER SOFA,"

BUT NOBODY KNEW THAT.

- [whispering] WHAT DID YOU DO
WITH HER CRUTCHES?

- [laughs]

- YOU HID HER CRUTCHES?

I DID NOT DO THAT. I WOULD NEVER
DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

- BUT YOU KNEW ABOUT IT.
YOU HAD KNOWLEDGE OF IT,

AND YOU LAUGHED.
- YES, SHE TOLD ME,

AND SHE LAUGHED,
BUT SHE ALSO TOLD ME,

"IT'S BACK THERE,
IT'S RIGHT THERE," SO THAT--

- BUT MAYBE
YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME.

- WHAT?

- MAYBE SOMEONE
SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME.

- OH, I--I DON'T KNOW.

I WAS OUT OF THE ROOM
WHEN YOU WERE LEAVING.

[laughter]

- I'LL JUST HOP AWAY.
I JUST WANTED TO LEAVE.

- I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.
- ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS LEAVE,

AND I COULDN'T.
IT'S HILARIOUS.

- I HAD ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
TO DO WITH THAT,

AND THAT'S TERRIBLE,
I UNDERSTAND,

AND MY SISTER,
WHEN SHE TOLD ME--

- YOU CAN'T SAY YOU HAD
NOTHING TO DO WITH IT,

BECAUSE YOU HAD THE KNOWLEDGE,
AND KNOWLEDGE IS POWER,

YOU COULD HAVE
RECTIFIED IT.

- BRANDI, BRANDI, BRANDI,
GIVE IT A REST.

- I'M JUST SAYING,
YOU CAN'T GO THERE, THAT'S--

- I THOUGHT WE WERE ALREADY
PAST THAT.

- "GIVE IT A REST?" OKAY.
- WELL, I'M ASKING ABOUT IT.

- I KNOW, BUT SHE'S--
SHE KNOWS I DIDN'T DO THAT.

SHE KNOWS IT WASN'T ME.

- COMING UP NEXT...

- I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU,
BY THE WAY.

- YOU'RE TALKING TO EVERYONE.
WOW, BACK OFF, OKLAHOMA.

- WE ARE BACK
WITH MORE OF

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES
OF BEVERLY HILLS REUNION.

I'M ANDY COHEN.

SPEND ANY AMOUNT OF TIME

WITH THE LADIES
OF BEVERLY HILLS,

AND ONE THING
BECOMES CRYSTAL CLEAR--

THEY EXUDE REFINEMENT,
DIGNITY, AND CLASS....

[laughter]
- VERY FUNNY.

- MOST OF THE TIME.
WATCH THIS.

[laughter]

- IF YOU DON'T HAVE
ANYTHING NICE TO SAY--

- YOU ARE A GODDAMN BITCH.

- I MEAN,
WHO TALKS LIKE THAT?

- DON'T BE HITTING ON ME,
YOU SICKO!

- WHO TALKS LIKE THAT?
I DON'T KNOW, I MEAN,

MAYBE I'M OLD FASHIONED.

ARE YOU READY TO TAKE THESE
CREAKY BEAVERS UP THE MOUNTAIN?

- NOT CLASSY.

[bleep bleep bleep bleep
bleep bleep bleep].

- IF YOU DON'T WATCH IT,
SOMETHING WILL BE

STUCK UP YOUR BOTTOM,
IF YOU DON'T WATCH IT.

- NO SUCH LUCK FOR ME.
- YEAH.

- I HAVE TO GO ACROSS THE ROAD
FOR THAT.

COME ON, PUT OUT.

- I THINK "CLASSLESS"
WAS THE WORD.

- I THINK IT WAS
OUT OF LINE.

- NIPPLES ARE IN THE SEASON,
SO I'M SORRY.

- WHO TALKS LIKE THAT?

- HOLY [bleep]. I NEED TO
GOBBLE MY DRINK, HOLD ON.

- [bleep]

- [indistinct]
- [bleep], [bleep]

- I LOVE YOU.

[bleep].

[laughter]

- OKAY, LADIES, TWO OF YOU
SWORE THE LEAST THIS YEAR.

ANY GUESS WHICH TWO
SWORE THE LEAST?

- CAMILLE AND ADRIENNE.
- ME.

- YES,
CAMILLE AND ADRIENNE.

YOU ALL GOT THAT RIGHT.

ANY GUESS
WHO HAD TO BE BLEEPED THE MOST?

- [laughs]

- NOPE.
- KYLE?

- IT WAS ME.

- BRANDI GOT IT RIGHT.
- OH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

- OH, I FORGOT ABOUT YOU, YEAH.
- [laughs]

- VERY GOOD.
- WELL, I THOUGHT

THAT WAS OBVIOUS.

- OKAY, SO INDULGE ME, THIS IS
MY JAMES LIPTON MOMENT, OKAY?

I WANT TO GO AROUND THE ROOM
AND HEAR EACH LADY'S

FAVORITE CURSE WORD, STARTING
WITH THE QUEEN OF THE CURSE.

- [bleep]

- POOPY STINK.

[laughs]
- OH, PLEASE.

- PUH-LEASE.
- SHE'S SO INNOCENT.

SHE'S NOT GONNA SAY--
[overlapping chatter]

- OH, MY GOD,
SEASON TWO CAMILLE.

- OKAY, OKAY.
- AND SHE'S A VIRGIN.

- LET'S SEE SEASON ONE CAMILLE'S
FAVORITE WORD.

- I SAY "ASS" A FEW TIMES
ON THE SHOW.

- "ASS"?
- THAT'S NOT A SWEAR WORD.

- ALL RIGHT, OKAY.
- I DO.

- UH, "BLOODY HELL."
I SAY IT EVERY FIVE MINUTES.

- IS THAT A SWEAR WORD?
- YOU SAY THE--

- YEAH, IT IS, REALLY.

- [bleep].

- I'VE SAID, [bleep].
THERE YOU GO.

- I MEAN, I GOTTA THROW OUT
THE F-BOMB, TOO.

[bleep].
- [bleep].

- ALL RIGHT.

WELL DONE.
THANK YOU, LADIES.

- I FEEL SO--
- DIRTY?

- TRASHY.
- NAUGHTY, TRASHY.

[laughter]

- WAIT,
WHERE ARE THE MEN?

- NO, I'M KIDDING.

- JERRY FROM EL PASO
WRITES, "LISA, I WAS APPALLED

"YOU LET JIGGY DRINK
OUT OF ONE OF

"ADRIENNE'S CRYSTAL GOBLETS,
AT THE DINNER TABLE NO LESS.

IS THIS WHAT YOU CALL
'PROPER ETIQUETTE'?"

- WELL, IT ACTUALLY WASN'T ME,
IT WAS KEN,

SO HE'S GOT TO TAKE THE HEAT
FOR THAT.

- RIGHT.
- WOULD I LET HIM DO IT AT HOME?

YES, OUT OF MY GLASS,
I WOULD.

- ADRIENNE,
WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THIS?

- WELL, I WAS--
THOUGHT,

MAYBE I SHOULD
BRING JACKPOT OVER

AND DRINK OUT OF
HER BEAUTIFUL CHAMPAGNE GLASSES,

AND THEN
LET'S SEE WHAT YOU WOULD SAY.

- HE'D BE WELCOME.
HE WOULD BE WELCOME.

- OH, SURE, SURE.
- OH.

- JANELLE FROM LINCOLN,
NEBRASKA, SAID,

"BRANDI,
WHEN IT COMES TO FASHION,

"WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
LOOKING SEXY VERSUS SLUTTY?"

- WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME?

UM, I DON'T KNOW.
I THINK,

HOWEVER YOU FEEL
THE MOST POWERFUL AND CONFIDENT

IS HOW YOU SHOULD ROLL.

- SO THAT'S SEXY?

LABIA.

I'M KIDDING.

- OH, GOD!
- I'M JUST KIDDING!

- OH, MY GOD.
- OH, NO, NO.

- JOKING. YOU GUYS--
THESE LADIES PRETEND

THAT THEY'RE ALL, LIKE,
"OH, MY GOD,"

AND THEN THEY'RE THE NEXT ONES
SAYING THE WORD.

- NOT THAT WORD.
- NOT REALLY.

- WELL, NO--
YEAH, NO.

- NO.
- YOU WERE IN THE SPLITS,

WITH THE LABIA SPREAD.

- YEAH,
BUT NOBODY SAW ANYTHING.

- I HAD A DRESS
DOWN TO MY ANKLES.

- KYLE, WHAT DO YOU THINK
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN

LOOKING SLUTTY
AND SEXY IS?

- THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
LOOKING SLUTTY AND SEXY,

SLUTTY IS WHEN YOU'RE SHOWING
TOO MUCH, BOOBS HANGING OUT,

A SKIRT TOO SHORT,
THAT'S LEAVING TOO MUCH.

- [laughs]

- SEXY--
- WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

- NO, I'M KIDDING.
- NO, SEXY IS LEAVING

A LITTLE SOMETHING
TO THE IMAGINATION.

- YEAH, SORRY.
- I AGREE WITH THAT.

- OKAY.

WELL, LISA,
YOU'VE NOT BEEN SHY TO ADMIT

THAT YOU'VE NEVER
BEEN A FAN OF TAYLOR,

AND PAINFULLY,
TAYLOR KNEW THIS ALL TOO WELL.

SO HOW IN THE WORLD DID
THESE TWO SUDDENLY BECOME BFFs?

TAKE A LOOK.

- GORGEOUS!
NICE FORM.

- OH,
THANKS, TAYLOR.

- OH, SORRY, LOVE.
- TYPICAL.

- I FEEL LIKE SHE DOESN'T
GENUINELY LIKE ME.

- OF COURSE
IT WOULD BE YOU.

I'VE NEVER BEEN
A HUGE FAN OF TAYLOR,

I'VE BEEN HONEST
ABOUT THAT.

- SHE IS
INTIMIDATING TO ME,

AND I FEEL LIKE
EVERY TIME SHE SEES ME,

SHE'S GOT, LIKE,
THIS LITTLE EDGE WITH ME.

- I'M NOT SAYING
I'M MASQUERADING

AS YOUR BEST FRIEND,
I'M JUST SAYING,

RIGHT NOW, IF YOU NEED SOMETHING
SORTING OUT, I'LL HELP YOU.

- LISA, THE LAST COUPLE
OF TIMES

YOU AND I
HAVE HAD A CONVERSATION,

YOU HAVE LED INTO IT BY SAYING,
AND I QUOTE,

"I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND."

- I HAVEN'T SAID
I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND, I--

- NOW, LISA,
YOU BETTER BACKTRACK, GIRL,

BECAUSE I'M TELLING RIGHT NOW--
- OH, DARLING, CALM DOWN.

- DON'T--
DON'T CUT ME OFF!

I HAVE BENT OVER BACKWARDS
SINCE THE DAY I MET YOU

TO BE KIND TO YOU, AND YOU HAVE
TREATED ME SO POORLY...

- NO, I HAVEN'T, DEAR.
- THAT IT IS EMBARRASSING.

- I HAVEN'T--
- YES, YOU HAVE.

I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE TRIED
TO MAKE SOMEBODY BE MY FRIEND

MORE THAN I HAVE TRIED
FOR YOU.

PLEASE,
IF YOU CAN'T BE MY FRIEND,

JUST PLEASE
DON'T BE MY ENEMY.

- I REALLY SAW
A DIFFERENT SIDE OF TAYLOR,

WHERE SHE WAS DESPERATE
FOR MY FRIENDSHIP.

- WE'RE GONNA BE FRIENDS.
- OKAY.

AND YOU JUST TELL ME--
- PINKY SWEAR.

- YOU TELL ME THE TRUTH.
- OH, MY GOD,

THIS IS ELEMENTARY SCHOOL,
I KNEW IT.

- [laughs]

- YOU GUYS HAVE HAD
THESE NEGATIVE FEELINGS

TOWARDS EACH OTHER FOR SO LONG,
AND NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN,

[snaps fingers]
IT'S ALL FINISHED?

EVERYTHING'S HUNKY DORY?

- [laughs]

- THAT'S JUST WEIRD.

- WOW. SO I WANT TO
GO BACK TO THE TEA PARTY.

TAYLOR, YOU SAID THAT LISA HAD
ALWAYS TREATED YOU VERY POORLY.

HOW DID YOU FEEL THAT SHE HAD
TREATED YOU POORLY?

- I DID NOT UNDERSTAND
LISA'S HUMOR.

THE LITTLE THINGS THAT SHE WOULD
SAY USED TO REALLY BOTHER ME.

YOU KNOW,
LITTLE DIGS,

AND I DIDN'T SEE THEM
AS JUST BRITISH HUMOR.

I'VE NEVER HAD BRITISH FRIENDS.
I MEAN, I GREW UP IN OKLAHOMA.

THERE ARE NO BRITISH PEOPLE
THERE, IT'S A FACT.

- [laughs]
- AND ALSO,

I'M A VERY INSECURE PERSON,
SO WHEN SHE WOULD SAY THINGS,

IT WOULD JUST REALLY
HURT MY FEELINGS.

AND A LOT OF IT WAS
MY OWN INSECURITY,

AND HER REALLY NOT ACCEPTING ME
BECAUSE OF A LOT OF THE THINGS

THAT SHE KNEW
OR THAT I HAD TOLD HER.

- SO WERE YOU LADIES SURPRISED
AT THE QUICK FLIP-FLOP

AFTER THAT PINKY SWEAR?

THAT THEY WERE ABLE TO THEN
MOVE FORWARD

AND BECOME GREAT FRIENDS?

- YES.
- YES?

- I WAS SHOCKED.
MM-HMM.

- THAT WAS QUICK.
- WELL, IT WAS--

- IT WAS VERY ABRUPT.
[overlapping chatter]

- FOR THIS GROUP,
THAT'S VERY QUICK.

- BUT YOU KNOW, ALSO,
AT THE TEA PARTY,

I THINK IT WAS WHAT TURNED IT,
WAS WHEN SHE SAID,

"I SO DESPERATELY
WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND."

I THOUGHT,
"WHY AM I FIGHTING THIS WOMAN?"

WHEN I SAW THAT SHE REALLY
WAS KIND OF STARTING TO SPIRAL,

I FELT SHE JUST SEEMED
IN EMOTIONAL CRISIS,

SO IT JUST SEEMED BETTER
TO TURN IT ROUND.

- TAYLOR,
AT THE TEA PARTY,

YOU SAID LISA'S EGO
WAS OUT OF CONTROL.

- MM-HMM.
- WHY DID YOU FEEL THAT?

- JIGGY WAS TWEETING THINGS
I DIDN'T THINK WERE APPROPRIATE,

UM, AND...
[laughter]

YOU KNOW, CALLING PEOPLE--LIKE,
WE WERE BEING CALLED NAMES.

- WHAT NAME DID JIGGY CALL YOU
ON TWITTER?

- I DON'T REMEMBER IF IT WAS
A DUCK OR A BLOWFISH,

WHATEVER IT WAS--
I MEAN, I--

- YOU CALL YOURSELF THAT
ALL THE TIME.

YOU ADMIT--YOU TALK ABOUT
YOUR LIPS ALL THE TIME.

- I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU,
BY THE WAY.

- YOU'RE TALKING TO EVERYONE.
- EXACTLY.

- WOW, BACK OFF, OKLAHOMA.
- NO, THE POINT IS,

I JUST FELT LIKE
THE WHOLE JIGGY THING,

IT ALL KIND OF PERPETUATING
A NEW PERSONALITY FOR LISA,

AND I DIDN'T LIKE IT.

- ELIZABETH FROM
ROCKFORD, ILLINOIS, SAID,

"LISA, YOU SEEMED BLINDSIDED
WHEN TAYLOR SAID

"ALL THE WOMEN
TALK BEHIND YOUR BACK.

"DO YOU THINK
THE WOMEN ARE AFRAID

TO CONFRONT YOU
FACE-TO-FACE?"

- UM, I DON'T KNOW.
YEAH, SHE DID SAY,

"THEY ALL TALK
BEHIND YOUR BACK,"

BUT THEN SHE SAID THAT
AS WELL.

- WHO SAID THAT?

- WELL, BRANDI--
- I DIDN'T SAY ALL OF YOU.

- YEAH.
- I CAN'T SPEAK FOR ALL OF YOU.

I SAID ONE PERSON,
SPECIFICALLY.

- WHO'S THE ONE PERSON?
- IT WASN'T ME, I DON'T SAY--

- UH, YOU.

- COMING UP NEXT...

- WHEN'S THE BOOK COME OUT,
ANYWAY?

- THIS IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS,
OKAY?

- YOU'VE MADE IT
THE WORLD'S BUSINESS.

- YOU'RE
WAY OUT OF YOUR PLACE.

- LISA, TAYLOR SAID

"ALL THE WOMEN
TALK BEHIND YOUR BACK.

"DO YOU THINK
THE WOMEN ARE AFRAID

TO CONFRONT YOU
FACE-TO-FACE?"

- YEAH, SHE DID SAY, "THEY ALL
TALK BEHIND YOUR BACK,"

BUT THEN SHE SAID THAT
AS WELL.

- WHO SAID THAT?

- WELL, BRANDI--
- I DIDN'T SAY ALL OF YOU.

- YEAH.
- I CAN'T SPEAK FOR ALL OF YOU.

I SAID ONE PERSON,
SPECIFICALLY.

- WHO'S THE ONE PERSON?
- IT WASN'T ME, I DON'T SAY--

- UH, YOU.

- WHAT DID I SAY?

- I'VE HEARD FROM PEOPLE
THAT WORK FOR YOU

THAT YOU DON'T LIKE LISA,
THAT'S ALL.

- WHY WOULD YOU GO
AND TELL HER ABOUT THAT?

- WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
- WHY WOULD YOU TELL HER THAT?

THAT WAS NOT--
THAT'S NOT NICE.

- UM--
- WHY WOULD YOU TELL HER THAT?

- BECAUSE SHE'S MY FRIEND
AND WE WERE TALKING.

- OKAY, BUT I THOUGHT
WE WERE FRIENDS.

- YOU HAVE NOT SEEN ME
SINCE THE SHOW WRAPPED.

YOU DON'T EVEN
RETURN TEXTS.

- YOU KNOW WHAT?
- YOU TWEET ME.

THAT--
WE'RE NOT FRIENDS, CLEARLY.

- BUT SHE'S CLEARLY REACHING OUT
TO YOU FOR ONE REASON.

- NO, NO.
- SHE'S AFRAID

OF WHAT YOU'RE GONNA SAY.
- SHE'S NEVER SAID ONE BAD THING

ABOUT ANY OF YOU.
- I HAVE NEVER

TALKED ABOUT ANY OF YOU.
- NOT AT ALL.

WE'VE NEVER--WE DON'T TALK ABOUT
THE OTHER WOMEN. NOTHING.

- SHE'S NEVER SAID A BAD THING
ABOUT ANYONE HERE, PERIOD.

NOT AT ALL.
- NOT THAT KIND OF RELATIONSHIP.

- THE ONLY TIME WE SPOKE...
- WE'VE SEEN EACH OTHER,

WE HAVE FUN.
- I SAID, "WHEN I INVITED--"

- SHE TOLD ME THAT SOME--
SORRY, CARRY ON.

- NO, I SAID I INVITED CAMILLE,
LISA, AND ADRIENNE

TO MY BIRTHDAY PARTY.

CAMILLE COULDN'T COME
AT THE LAST MINUTE,

'CAUSE SHE WAS SICK,
BUT WE KEPT IN CONTACT.

LISA SHOWED UP,
AND ADRIENNE'S LIKE,

"I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN COME OUT
AND BE IN NEW YORK."

I DIDN'T HEAR FROM HER
FOR A MONTH.

YOU NEVER GOT BACK TO ME,
YOU NEVER--

- YES, I DID, I GOT BACK TO YOU
THE NEXT NIGHT.

YOU DIDN'T RESPOND TO ME.
- NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.

I SAID, "ARE YOU COMING?"
- NO, YOU DIDN'T RESPOND TO ME.

NO, I DID.
- WHAT?

- AND I INVITED YOU
TO HALLOWEEN,

AND YOU DIDN'T COME.
YOU DIDN'T COME.

- WITH THE KIDS,
YOU ALSO INVITED

1,000 OTHER PEOPLE.
- SO WHAT?

I INVITED YOU.
YOU'RE SAYING THAT I HAVEN'T--

THAT I'M NOT THINKING OF YOU.
OF COURSE, I'M THINKING OF YOU.

- I SAID I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU.
- I INVITED YOU.

- I DIDN'T SAY
YOU WEREN'T THINKING OF ME.

- YOU'RE RIGHT,
BUT I INVITED YOU, DIDN'T I?

- YEAH.
- DID I INVITE YOU?

- YES.
- SO I'M REACHING OUT TO YOU,

AND YOU DIDN'T COME.
- I COULDN'T.

- OKAY, THEN DON'T SAY
I'M NOT BEING RESPONSIBLE.

- I SAID, "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU
SINCE WE WRAPPED."

THAT'S WHAT I SAID.

- BUT I THINK THAT'S KIND OF
REALLY MEAN FOR YOU TO SAY,

YOU KNOW,
I WOULD REACH OUT TO BRANDI

AND BE FRIENDLY WITH BRANDI
'CAUSE I WANT HER ON MY SIDE.

I DON'T NEED ANYBODY
ON MY SIDE.

WE WEREN'T FRIENDS
AT THE BEGINNING,

AND THEN I FOUND HER FUNNY
IN HAWAII,

AND WE BECAME FRIENDS.

THERE'S NO ULTERIOR MOTIVE.

I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT
THE OTHER WOMEN.

IF I WANT TO SAY ANYTHING,
I WILL SAY IT TO THEIR FACE.

I'VE SAID THAT
TO YOU MANY TIMES.

- SAM FROM PORTLAND, MAINE,
SAID,

"KYLE, CAMILLE,
AND ADRIENNE,

"DO YOU FEEL LIKE TAYLOR
TRIED TO THROW YOU

UNDER THE LISA BUS?"

- I DID.
- I DO.

- AT THE TEA PARTY.
- AT THE TEA PARTY. YES, I DO.

MM-HMM.
- HOW?

- WELL, SHE SAID, "CAMILLE
SAID THIS, AND CAMILLE SAID--"

SHE COMPLETELY
PUT MY NAME INTO IT

AND THREW ME UNDER THE BUS

AND WHEN I WATCHED THE EPISODE
AFTERWARDS,

SHE WENT OUTSIDE
TO TALK TO PAUL, AND SAID,

"ALL THE GIRLS
HAVE MY BACK."

I NEVER SAID I HAD HER BACK
AGAINST LISA, NEVER.

I NEVER SAID THAT TO YOU.

NEVER.

YOU CAN SAY OTHERWISE,
BUT I KNOW.

- NO, I'M NOT GONNA SAY--
- I SWEAR TO GOD,

I'VE NEVER SAID
THAT I HAD--

- YEAH, YOU AND I
HAD A PHONE CALL,

AND YOU SAID,
"LISA PHONED ME AND SAID,

"'PULL ME ASIDE
AT THE SEANCE,

AND SAY TAYLOR
IS NOT MY FRIEND.'"

- NO! I NE--
NOTHING ABOUT THE SEANCE.

I'M SORRY,
TELL HER YOU'RE LYING.

- AT THE SEANCE
AT THE NEXT EVENT.

THAT--
- OH!

THAT'S A LIE.

- NANCY FROM WASHINGTON, DC,
SAID,

"WHY DIDN'T ANY OF THE WOMEN
BACK UP TAYLOR

"WHEN SHE CONFRONTED LISA
AT THE TEA PARTY?

OR WERE ALL OF YOU
AFRAID OF LISA?"

- IT WAS THEIR ARGUMENT,

AND WE DIDN'T WANT
TO GET INVOLVED.

AND I DON'T NEED
ANY MORE DRAMA IN MY LIFE.

I'VE HAD PROBLEMS AND ISSUES
WITH MY SISTER, KIM,

AND IT'S VERY HARD, BECAUSE
I AM FRIENDS WITH ALL OF THEM.

- ANNA FROM BEDFORD,
VIRGINIA, SAID,

"DO THE OTHER LADIES THINK THAT
LISA'S FRIENDSHIP WITH TAYLOR

"IS GENUINE, OR IS LISA
TRYING TO COME OFF AS A SAINT?"

- HONESTLY, I SAT WITH LISA
AT DINNER,

AND I SAID TO LISA
SOMETHING NEGATIVE ABOUT TAYLOR,

AND SHE HAD TAYLOR'S BACK,
100%.

AND I DIDN'T
AGREE WITH HER,

BUT I'M SAYING THAT IS--
NO CAMERAS ROLLING,

THAT IS A GENUINE--
WE HAD A GENUINE DISAGREEMENT.

- BRANDI, WHAT WAS YOUR ISSUE
WITH TAYLOR?

- I SAW RUSSELL
AT THE GLEN,

AND HE TOLD ME THAT TAYLOR
HAD HIM SEND THE EMAIL

TO CAMILLE,
AND HE FELT HORRIBLE ABOUT IT,

AND THAT
HE ALWAYS LIKED CAMILLE,

AND THAT JUST--NOT--
IT DIDN'T SET WELL WITH ME,

AND THAT'S IT.

- SHE SAID THAT RUSSELL
WAS REALLY UPSET--

- HE WAS, HE WAS LIKE,
"I ALWAYS LOVED CAMILLE."

- THE DAY AFTER,
HE SAID,

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
[bleep] HOLE,

"[bleep] YOU,
YOU [bleep] PSYCHOTIC BITCH."

- YOU CAN SAY
WHATEVER YOU WANT TO SAY NOW,

I'M JUST SAYING.
- NO, I TEXT MY SHRINK

IMMEDIATELY, SO YOU WANT TO
GO THROUGH MY TEXT MESSAGES?

- LISA WAS THERE WITH HER.
- LISA WAS WITH ME WHEN IT--

LIKE, THE VERY NEXT MORNING,
I DIDN'T SPEAK TO HIM

FOR AN ENTIRE DAY.
- I'M TELLING YOU WHAT RUSSELL

SAID TO ME.
- OKAY, GREAT.

RUSSELL IS
A MASTER MANIPULATOR,

YOU WANT TO GO TALK TO
THE 50 PEOPLE THAT ARE SUING ME

RIGHT NOW
FOR GETTING MANIPULATED BY HIM

FOR THE LAST 20 YEARS?
- BUT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND

THAT SHE'S ONLY LISTENING
TO WHAT RUSSELL SAID.

- I UNDERSTAND.
- YEAH.

- AND SHE 100%
HAD YOUR BACK,

AND SAID, "I DON'T BELIEVE--"
- BECAUSE SHE KNOWS THE TRUTH,

'CAUSE SHE KNOWS SO MUCH MORE
THAN YOU KNOW, HONEY.

- BUT THAT--
BUT THAT'S GREAT.

- I MEAN, EDDIE CIBRIAN SAYS
YOU SLIT HIS TIRES.

IS THAT TRUE?
- YEAH.

- OKAY--OH.
OKAY, THEN.

- [chuckles]

DID YOU SLIT HIS TIRES?

- I OWN THEM, TOO.
I MEAN, I JUST TOOK THE TIRES,

AND I PUT THE KNIFE
INTO HIS MOTORCYCLES,

AND THEN I TOLD HIM,
"DON'T RIDE THEM,

YOU'RE PROBABLY
GONNA GET HURT."

- I REST MY CASE.

- WHAT IS THAT?
WHAT IS YOUR CASE?

- YEAH, WHAT IS YOUR CASE?
- WHEN'S THE BOOK COME OUT,

ANYWAY?

HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN?
- OOH.

- STOP.

SORRY, NEXT QUESTION.

- WHY YOU THINK
IT'S INAPPROPRIATE

THAT SHE WROTE A BOOK?

- UH, IT'S BEEN, LIKE,
A HOT MINUTE. YEAH.

- REALLY, BRANDI? THIS IS EX--
- WELL, THREE WOMEN DIE

EVERY SINGLE DAY
FROM DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.

YOU WANT ME TO WAIT
ANOTHER MONTH,

SO 100 MORE WOMEN
WILL BE DEAD?

HOW ABOUT SIX MONTHS,
SO 600 MORE WOMEN ARE DEAD?

- THIS ABOUT YOUR DAUGHTER
AND RUSSELL.

- NO, IT'S NOT.
IT'S NOT, EITHER.

- IT IS.
- IT'S ABOUT WOMEN

THAT ARE DYING EVERY SINGLE--
- REALLY?

- THIS IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS,
OKAY?

- YOU MAKE IT
THE WORLD'S BUSINESS.

- YOU'RE WAY OUT OF YOUR PLACE.
- NO, YOU ARE!

- YOU'RE OUT OF LINE.

- SOMEBODY DIED HERE.
- OKAY?

- YES, EXACTLY,
SO LET HIM REST IN PEACE.

- OKAY, AND THEY HAVE A CHILD.
- BACK OFF!

- LISTEN,
DO NOT JUDGE

UNTIL YOU'VE WALKED
IN SOMEONE ELSE'S SHOES, OKAY?

- OH, [bleep] OFF.

- WOW. YOU JUST CAME IN HERE--
YOU ARE ANGRY SPICE.

- WHAT ARE YOU?

- I'M JUST--

- EXACTLY.

- SHE'S A SINGLE MOM NOW

WITH A HUSBAND
THAT KILLED HIMSELF.

HOW DARE YOU TALK LIKE THAT.
- RIGHT, AND SHE WROTE A BOOK

ABOUT IT
IN ONE SECOND.

- HOW DARE YOU GO ON
A REALITY SHOW AND SIT THERE

AND CALL ME UP AND SAY,
"I'M SORRY,

I HAVE TO BE AN ASSHOLE
TO YOU IN MY BLOG."

- DID I CALL YOU?
HAVE WE TALKED ON THE PHONE?

- YEAH.
- NO, WE TEXTED.

- OH, I'M SORRY,
I TEXTED YOU.

- I SAID, "I'M SOR--"
I JUST SAID,

"MY BLOG IS RATHER AGGRESSIVE
THIS WEEK, JUST FYI."

- YOU'RE TAKING IT
A LITTLE TOO FAR TODAY,

BUT I HAVE BEEN NICE
TO YOU.

- I'M TAKING IT TOO FAR.
- I--I'VE INVITED--

I INVITED YOU TO MY PARTY,
I SAID,

"I'D LOVE TO HAVE YOU
TO MY HOLIDAY PARTY,"

AND YOU TEXTED BACK,
"THANKS SO MUCH, PRETTY,

BUT I HAVE MY BOYS, I CAN'T
GO OUT, MY BOYS ARE HERE."

AND I SAID, "YOU'RE WELCOME
TO BRING THEM,

THEY CAN PLAY WITH PORTIA,"
AND WHAT'S THE NEXT TEXT I GET?

- WHY WOULD I WANT TO
GO TO YOUR HOLIDAY PARTY?

- "KYLE'S A C-U-[bleep]-T,"

THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO
GO TO SOMEBODY ELSE.

SHE TEXTED TO SOMEONE ELSE AND
GOES TO ME BY ACCIDENT ABOUT ME.

- YEAH, THAT'S TRUE.
- IS THAT TRUE?

- SO TALK ABOUT TWO-FACED,
THIS IS THE BRANDI

THAT I'VE HEARD ABOUT
AND WAS SEEING

THAT THE CAMERAS
DIDN'T ALWAYS SEE.

- OKAY.
- YOU CAME IN

ATTACKING EVERYONE TODAY.
YOU'RE GOING AFTER TAYLOR...

- NO, YOU GO--YOU DON'T KNOW--

- AND BEING SO VICIOUS,
WHEN SHE'S BEEN THROUGH

ENOUGH THIS YEAR.
- YOU'RE A BIPOLAR PERSON.

YOU DON'T KNOW
IF YOU'RE HERE OR YOU'RE HERE.

- SHE'S BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH
THIS YEAR, BRANDI.

- BUT MAYBE SHE FEELS
THE SAME WAY ABOUT YOU.

- BE A LITTLE SYMPATHETIC.
- SHE DOESN'T KNOW

WHERE YOU ARE, EITHER.
- AFTER EDDIE LEFT YOU

FOR LEANN RIMES
WITH TWO KIDS,

I'M SURE YOU WOULD HAVE WANTED
A LITTLE SYMPATHY.

HER HUSBAND KILLED HIMSELF.
HAVE A LITTLE SYMPATHY.

- OKAY, SHE JUST BARKED AT ME,
"DID YOU SLASH THE TIRES?"

I SAID YES.
- YOU'RE HITTING BELOW THE BELT.

- IF YOU--
I'M HITTING BELOW--

- YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANYTHING
FROM ME ANYMORE,

'CAUSE I DON'T--
- SHE SAID

SHE SLASHED THE TIRES.
I MEAN, YOU KNOW,

TO BE HONEST,
SLASHING THE TIRES,

I MEAN, IT'S NOT REALLY
ANY OF OUR BUSINESS.

- A LITTLE SCARY.
- WELL, IS IT REALLY?

I MEAN, I THINK--
I MEAN, I'M NOT SAYING

I GO OUT AND DO IT
EVERY AFTERNOON,

BUT I THINK IT WAS HER HUSBAND,
SHE OWNED THE THING,

AND HE RAN OFF
WITH SOME OTHER WOMAN,

AND SHE STUCK A KNIFE
IN IT.

I'M NOT CONDONING IT,

BUT I DON'T THINK
IT'S FOR US TO JUDGE.

I MEAN, I'M JUST PUTTING IT
OUT THERE IN HER DEFENSE.

- WELL, LAST SEASON ENDED
IN A BLOWOUT FIGHT

BETWEEN KYLE AND KIM.

SINCE THEN THE TWO SISTERS HAVE
TRIED HARD TO PICK UP THE PIECES

AND REPAIR THE DAMAGE
TO THEIR RELATIONSHIP,

BUT PUTTING IT BACK TOGETHER
HASN'T BEEN EASY.

- I FEEL LIKE YOU AND I
HAVE GONE THROUGH SO MUCH,

BUT WE'RE
IN A GOOD PLACE.

- WELL, WE'RE IN--
WE'RE IN TRANSITION.

I'M WORKING VERY HARD,

'CAUSE IT HAS
TO COME FROM ME NOW.

SHE SAID, "WELL,
I'M OVER THIS, I'M GOOD."

I'M NOT THERE YET.
I WANT TO BE SO BAD.

- KIM, SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH,
KIM.

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN, "SHH?"

- YOU'RE TALKING TOO MUCH,
I'M TELLING YOU--

- KYLE, YOU'RE NOT MY MOTHER,
THANKS.

- ARE YOU COMING?
- NO.

- OKAY. ADRIENNE
THINKS YOU'RE COMING.

SO YOU NEED TO CALL HER
AND TELL HER.

- KYLE'S ALWAYS
TRYING TO CONTROL

WHAT GOES ON IN MY LIFE,
BUT IT REALLY IS MINE,

AND IT'S ABOUT ME
AND WHAT I WANT.

- KIM.
- [indistinct answer]

- ANSWER ME,
YOU'RE ON THE 6:00 FLIGHT?

- [on phone] NO, I'M AT HOME,
LOOKING FOR MY [bleep] KEYS!

- [hisses]

[growls]

- WHY ARE YOU
SO WORRIED ABOUT ME?

ENJOY YOURSELF, AND YOU'RE NOT
ENJOYING YOUR OWN LIFE.

- THAT'S BULL [bleep].

- IT'S NOT BULL [bleep].
- IT IS BULL [bleep].

- JUST KNOCK IT OFF.

YOU WANT TO TALK TO YOUR KIDS
LIKE THAT?

GO AHEAD.
I'M A BIG GIRL.

- DON'T EXPECT THERE ARE NOT
REPERCUSSIONS FOR YOUR ACTIONS.

- THERE'S NO REPERCUSSIONS.
- YEAH, THERE ARE.

- WE CAN'T SEEM TO
GET IT TOGETHER.

- [crying] I WANTED YOU
TO BE WITH ME.

- [crying] I WANTED
TO BE WITH YOU.

- NO, YOU DIDN'T.
YOU MISSED THE FLIGHT,

YOU MISSED THE BOAT,
YOU MISSED THE BUS,

WHATEVER THE--
THEY WERE MAD AT ME.

- EVERYTHING'S MY FAULT.

- I APOLOGIZED, BUT YOU
NEVER APOLOGIZE TO ME, EVER,

FOR WHAT YOU DO.

- SO KIM, OBVIOUSLY,
IS NOT HERE.

DO YOU THINK SEEING HERSELF
ON THE SHOW CONTRIBUTED TO HER

REALIZING SHE HAD A PROBLEM,
OR WAS IT BIGGER THAN THAT?

WHAT DID SHE
THINK OF THE SHOW?

- I THINK, TO BE HONEST,
SHE DIDN'T WATCH ALL THE TIME.

- UH-HUH.
- [laughs]

- UM, IT'S HARD TO EXPLAIN,
BUT KIM, AS YOU KNOW,

DOESN'T SHOW UP A LOT--SHE'S NOT
THAT INTO BEING ON THE SHOW,

SHE DOESN'T REALLY CARE
ABOUT DOING THE SHOW.

- SHE KIND OF LIVES IN HER OWN
WORLD, IN A WAY, DOESN'T SHE?

- AND SHE DOESN'T EVEN
WATCH THE SHOW.

SHE DOESN'T READ TABLOIDS.
- WHY DID SHE--

WHY IS SHE ON THE SHOW?

- I THOUGHT IT WOULD MAYBE
BE A GOOD IDEA FOR HER

TO, "A,"
HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY,

HAVE SOMETHING OUTSIDE OF
JUST HAVING HER CHILDREN,

BECAUSE SHE PUTS
SO MUCH FOCUS ON THEM,

AND THEY'RE ALREADY GROWN
AND, REALLY, LEAVING.

AND I THOUGHT MAYBE IT WOULD
HELP KEEP HER ON TRACK,

TO BE HONEST.

- DO YOU THINK THAT
CALLING HER OUT AS AN ALCOHOLIC

ON CAMERA WAS SOMETHING THAT
HAD TO HAPPEN IN ORDER FOR HER

TO EVENTUALLY REACH THE POINT
WHERE SHE SOUGHT HELP?

- I THINK THAT IT WAS
THE WORST FIGHT

WE HAVE EVER HAD, BUT WE HAD
BOTH BEEN HOLDING IN SO MUCH.

I HAD NEVER WANTED
TO CONFRONT HER,

YOU KNOW, I DID IN PERSON,
OF COURSE,

WE'D TALK ABOUT THINGS,
BUT IT GOT TO A POINT

WHERE I DIDN'T THINK
THERE WAS GONNA BE ANY CHANGE,

SO IT WAS A VERY
PASSIVE/AGGRESSIVE RELATIONSHIP.

SO AFTER HOLDING SO MUCH IN
FOR SO LONG,

AND I BLEW THAT NIGHT,
I THINK THAT ULTIMATELY

IT ENDED UP
HELPING OUR RELATIONSHIP,

BECAUSE IT BROUGHT
A LOT OF DIRT UP, YOU KNOW,

AND MADE US HAVE TO
DEAL WITH THE SITUATION.

- COMING UP NEXT...

SHE WAS PREGNANT?
- YES, SHE WAS PREGNANT.

I THINK AT THAT POINT
YOU HAVE TO FILE FOR DIVORCE.

- WELL, BRENDA FROM MILWAUKEE
SAYS THAT SHE UNDERSTANDS

THAT YOU'RE ALWAYS HELPING KIM
KEEP HERSELF TOGETHER

AND PROTECTING HER,
BUT IN A WAY

WERE YOU ACTUALLY
ALSO ENABLING HER?

- IT APPEARS ON THE SHOW
THAT I AM ENABLING HER,

BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO
TALK ABOUT IT,

OR ADDRESS IT
IN FRONT OF THE CAMERAS.

WHEN THERE ARE
NO CAMERAS THERE,

I AM NOT AN ENABLER
IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM,

WHICH IS PART OF HER ANGER
TOWARDS ME.

- IF YOU LOOK AT
THE WHOLE SEASON,

WE REALLY DIDN'T HAVE
THAT MUCH INTERACTION WITH HER.

ALMOST HER STORY LINE
WAS HER NOT SHOWING UP.

- RIGHT.
- SO IT WAS KIND OF HARD,

AND BECAUSE WE'RE ALL
QUITE CLOSE,

HOW CAN YOU EXPOSE SOMETHING
THAT YOU'RE NOT SURE ABOUT,

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
- MM-HMM.

- SO YOU HAVE TO WAIT FOR THEM
TO TAKE THE LEAD,

SO AS SOON AS SHE
WENT INTO REHAB,

WE'RE ALL THERE, YOU KNOW,
TO SUPPORT HER,

BUT IT'S VERY DIFFICULT--YOU'VE
GOT TO BE SENSITIVE, REALLY.

- WELL, SHE WASN'T READY
TO DO THAT,

AND I DIDN'T--IF I HAD TAKEN IT
UPON MYSELF TO

ON A TELEVISION SHOW
COME OUT AND SAY,

"MY SISTER HAS THIS PROBLEM,
SHE'S DEALING WITH THIS,"

SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN
MORE ANGRY WITH ME,

AND MY FAMILY WOULD HAVE BEEN
ANGRY, AND IT WASN'T MY PLACE.

- MATT FROM CHICAGO SAYS,

"EVERYONE KNEW TAYLOR
WAS IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP,

"BUT NO ONE
WOULD SAY ANYTHING.

"EVERYONE KNEW KIM HAD
A SUBSTANCE ABUSE ISSUE,

"BUT NO ONE EXCEPT BRANDI
WOULD SAY ANYTHING.

"LADIES, DON'T YOU THINK
KEEPING QUIET

DOES MORE HARM THAN GOOD?"

- NO, I THINK
IT'S VERY DIFFICULT

FOR A VIEWER OF THE SHOW
TO JUDGE HOW WE'RE HANDLING IT.

YOU KNOW,
OUR LIVES ARE VERY OPEN,

WE SHOW THE MAJORITY
OF OUR LIVES ON TELEVISION,

BUT THERE ARE CERTAIN THINGS
THAT WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH

PRIVATELY IN OUR HOMES.

I DON'T SHOWER
ON THE SHOW.

YOU KNOW,
CONFRONTING MY SISTER--

- YOU DO THE SPLITS.
- REALLY?

- SEASON THREE.
- I DON'T HAVE SEX

WITH MY HUSBAND ON THE SHOW.
I MEAN, WHAT--

- SEASON FOUR.
[laughter]

- YEAH. [laughs]

- THAT WOULD BE GREAT.
- UH, YEAH.

- THAT WOULD BE,
I WOULD WATCH IT.

- [laughter]
- SO THERE ARE CERTAIN THINGS

THAT WERE
NOT MEANT TO BE DEALT WITH--

AS MUCH AS
IT IS A REALITY SHOW,

AND I UNDERSTAND HOW PEOPLE WANT
TO SEE EVERY PART OF OUR LIVES,

THERE ARE CERTAIN THINGS
THAT WERE PRIVATE.

- CURIOUS IF IT WOULD HAVE
ALMOST BEEN FREEING TO YOU

IF SOMEONE ELSE HAD TAKEN
PART OF THIS BURDEN OFF OF YOU

AND TAKEN HER ASIDE
AND TALKED TO HER ABOUT IT,

OR DO YOU THINK IT ULTIMATELY
JUST WOULD HAVE WOUND UP--

- I THINK IT PROBABLY
WOULD HAVE BEEN A RELIEF.

- MAYBE I HELPED YOU.
- I THINK--I ALSO THINK THAT--

- I'M SERIOUS,
MAYBE IT GOT IT OUT THERE

THAT THERE'S A PROBLEM, AND THEN
EVERYONE HAD TO ADDRESS IT.

NOT IN THE RIGHT WAY,
BUT IT HAPPENED.

- NO OFFENSE, BUT IT HAD
NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.

- OKAY, CAMILLE,
HERE ARE A LIST OF ADJECTIVES

THAT WERE USED TO DESCRIBE YOU
LAST SEASON BY VIEWERS, OKAY?

"CONNIVING,
PASSIVE/AGGRESSIVE,

"NARCISSISTIC, INSECURE,
CATTY, JEALOUS, CRUEL,

HYPOCRITICAL, SELF-ABSORBED,
AND DELUSIONAL."

- OUCH.
- DOES THAT RING A BELL?

- OH, I REMEMBER IT.
[laughs]

- AND THEN HERE'S
A TYPICAL EMAIL

FROM THIS SEASON,
IT'S FROM SUSAN IN CINCINNATI.

[in a high voice]
"CAMILLE, I MUST ADMIT THAT

"LAST SEASON I DESPISED YOU...
[laughter]

"BUT AFTER WATCHING
HOW YOU'VE HANDLED YOURSELF

"WITH GRACE AND STYLE
THROUGH A MESSY DIVORCE,

YOU'VE BECOME
MY FAVORITE."

- AW.
- OH.

- HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN
SUCH A BIG CHANGE?

- I--I WANT TO THANK PEOPLE
FOR TWEETING KIND THINGS TO ME,

THANK YOU.
[laughter]

- SHE DROPPED THE DEAD WEIGHT,
AND NOW SHE'S A NEW PERSON.

- WELL,
THIS TIME LAST YEAR,

CAMILLE WAS
ON THE COVER OF A MAGAZINE

WITH A HEADLINE THAT READ,

"AMERICA'S
MOST HATED HOUSEWIFE."

- AW, THAT'S SO MEAN.

- WHAT A DIFFERENCE
A YEAR MAKES.

LET'S TAKE A LOOK.

- IF HE'S A BAD KISSER,
FORGET IT.

- FORGET IT.
- OH, MY GOD.

- MY EX
WAS A TERRIBLE KISSER.

all: OHH!
[laughter]

- I FEEL LIKE CAMILLE NOW,
COMPARED TO A YEAR AGO,

IS A COMPLETELY
DIFFERENT PERSON.

DUMP THAT HAIRY LUG.
[laughter]

- IT'S ABOUT TIME.
- I JUST HAVE TO

SCRAPE THOSE BARNACLES OFF.
[laughter]

- I FEEL THAT
SHE'S HAPPIER.

- BIG, HANDS, BIG FEET,
BIG DISAPPOINTMENT.

- RIGHT?
- BIG DISAPPOINTMENT.

[laughter]

- I FEEL LIKE I'M HANGING OUT
WITH A DIFFERENT GIRL.

[techno music]

- OH, WELL.

♪♪ ♪♪

- I THINK CAMILLE AT THIS POINT
IS PROBABLY READY TO DATE.

- I'D LOVE 16 OUNCES OF FREEDOM.
YOU KIDDING ME?

[laughter]

- I LIKE EIGHT INCHES
OF FREEDOM.

[laughter]

- THEY SHOULD HAVE
A REALLY HOT GUY

GOING AROUND
PUTTING SUNSCREEN ON THE GIRLS.

- THEY SHOULD HAVE JUST
REALLY HOT GUYS HERE, PERIOD.

- I KNOW.
[laughter]

- SHE HAS A GREAT MAN
COMING IN HER LIFE,

AND HE SWINGS
IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.

- OH!
[all screaming and laughing]

- WANT TO KNOW
WHAT SHE'S BEEN DOING?

- I DO.
[laughs]

OH, MY GOSH.

- OF COURSE I'M EXCITED
ABOUT DATING.

HE'S GOT
A VERY LARGE PENIS.

[laughs]

- GOD, I SEEM SEX-CRAZED
THIS SEASON. [laughs]

- IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME, HONEY,
YOU DESERVE IT.

- SO ARE YOU STILL DATING
THE MAN WITH THE WASHBOARD ABS?

- YES.

- WOW.
- THAT'S GREAT.

THIS IS THE GUY THAT
WE'VE SEEN PICTURES OF YOU WITH

IN THE TABLOIDS.
- YES.

- HE'S A BIT YOUNGER, YES?
- YES.

- HOW MUCH YOUNGER?
- UH, EIGHT YEARS.

- OH, OKAY.
SO HAVE ALL YOU LADIES MET HIM?

- MM-HMM.
- YEAH.

- WOW.
- HE'S SWEET.

- YEAH, HE'S CRAZY.
- HE'S KIND OF QUIET AND SHY

IN PERSON, RIGHT?
[all agree]

- HE'S QUIET, RESERVED.
- BUT IT'S VERY CUTE

THE WAY HE STARES AT CAMILLE
AND WATCHES HER.

- HOW LONG HAVE YOU
BEEN TOGETHER?

- GOD, AT THIS POINT
MAYBE SIX, SEVEN MONTHS.

- NO WAY.
THAT'S GREAT.

- I'M VERY HAPPY FOR YOU.
- [sings wedding music]

[laughter]
- NO, NO, NO, NO,

I'M NOT READY FOR THAT.
- YEAH, IS IT--IS IT...

SERIOUS, IS IT--
HOW WOULD YOU CLASSIFY IT?

- WE'RE VERY HAPPY, AND WE'RE
ENJOYING EACH OTHER'S COMPANY.

UM, IS IT SERIOUS?
WELL, I'M ONLY SEEING HIM,

SO I'M DEVOTED TO HIM THAT WAY.
I MEAN, I BELIEVE IN MONOGAMY.

- THERE'S BEEN
A LOT OF CHATTER...

- UH-HUH.
- UM, FROM YOU

ABOUT YOUR LACK OF SATISFACTION
IN YOUR LAST RELATIONSHIP...

- [laughs]
- PHYSICALLY.

IS THIS GUY
DOING IT FOR YOU?

- ABSOLUTELY.
- OH, MY, YES.

- [laughter]
- EXCELLENT.

OKAY, VERY GOOD.

HOW HAVE THE KIDS REACTED
TO THE NEW BOYFRIEND?

- UM, THEY LIKE HIM
A LOT.

HE SPENDS
A LOT OF TIME WITH THEM,

HE ENJOYS THEM,
AND THEY ADORE HIM.

- WHAT IS THE STATUS
OF YOUR ONGOING CUSTODY BATTLE

WITH KELSEY?
- ONGOING.

I'VE HEARD IT CAN GO ANYWHERE
FROM, LIKE, TWO YEARS TO FIVE.

- WOW.
- MINE WAS TWO AND A HALF YEARS.

- OH, WOW.
OH, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.

- THEY'LL BE GROWN UP
BY THEN.

- SO ARE YOU
SPEAKING WITH HIM AT ALL?

- NO, NOT AT ALL.
WE DON'T SPEAK.

HE WON'T SPEAK TO ME.
I'VE REACHED OUT.

I THINK WE NEED TO COMMUNICATE
TO CO-PARENT OUR CHILDREN.

- I AGREE.
- SUCH A SHAME.

- AND, UM, IT IS A SHAME,
BECAUSE I'VE TRIED.

- BUT I THINK IT'S HARD
WHEN THERE'S OTHER WOMEN

IN THEIR--BECAUSE THERE'S
OTHER WOMEN IN THEIR LIVES,

THEY DON'T FEEL LIKE
THEY'RE ALLOWED TO SPEAK TO US.

- THEY HAVE MORE INFLUENCE.
- YEAH.

- TIM FROM MINNEAPOLIS
SAYS, "CAMILLE, WHAT'S IT LIKE

"TO HEAR KELSEY TALKING
TO NATIONAL MEDIA OUTLETS ABOUT

MEETING HIS CURRENT WIFE WHILE
HE WAS STILL MARRIED TO YOU?"

- IT'S VERY HURTFUL.
I MEAN, HE GLAMORIZES IT,

HE MAKES IT LOOK LIKE
IT'S SO ROMANTIC,

WHILE WE WERE STILL
VERY MUCH MARRIED--

WELL, I THOUGHT WE WERE.
[laughs]

UM, HE MET HER, WHAT,
IN DECEMBER?

AND I DIDN'T FILE
UNTIL JULY,

SO THEY WERE COURTING
FOR AWHILE.

- MORE THAN COURTING,
SHE WAS PREGNANT.

- YES,
SHE WAS PREGNANT.

I THINK AT THAT POINT
YOU HAVE TO FILE FOR DIVORCE.

[laughter]
- KELSEY, IN THE PRESS,

CALLED YOU BEING ON THE SHOW
HIS PARTING GIFT TO YOU.

- I KNOW.
THANK YOU, KELSEY.

FIRST HE SAID
HE BASICALLY LEFT ME

BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE
ON THE SHOW,

AND THEN HE TURNS AROUND
AND TELLS THE PRESS THAT

IT WAS MY PARTING GIFT,
SO WHAT IS IT, KELSEY?

WHAT'S THE REAL STORY?
- HELLO, HE HAD NOTHING

TO DO WITH IT, I CALLED YOU.
[overlapping chatter]

[laughs]
- KYLE CALLED ME UP.

- I WAS THERE,
AND HE WANTED TO BE--

HE WANTED YOU ON THE SHOW.
- HE WANTED ME ON THE SHOW.

- LIZ FROM TRENTON,
NEW JERSEY, SAID,

"CAMILLE, DO YOU TAKE
GUILTY PLEASURE IN THE FACT THAT

YOUR SHOW GETS BIGGER RATINGS
THAN YOUR EX-HUSBAND'S NEW SHOW?

[laughter]
- HONESTLY? YES.

[laughter]
- WHOO-HOO!

- CLAIRE FROM MALIBU
WANTS TO KNOW

WHY YOU STILL
GO BY THE NAME "GRAMMER"?

I WANT TO KNOW, TOO.
I LIKE "DONATACCI."

all: I LIKE "DONATACCI," TOO.

- BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
UM, OUR CHILDREN ARE "GRAMMER,"

AND RIGHT NOW IT MAKES THINGS
A LOT LESS COMPLICATED

THAN CHANGING EVERYTHING.
MAYBE AFTER ALL THE SETTLEMENT--

- RIGHT.
- THE SETTLEMENT'S OVER

AND THE CUSTODY BATTLE'S DONE,
THEN I'LL DECIDE AT THAT TIME.

- BRANDI, YOU CHANGED YOUR NAME
FROM CIBRIAN BACK TO GLANVILLE.

- UH, YES, I DID.
- WHY DID YOU DO THAT?

- BECAUSE THERE WERE
TOO MANY OF US FLOATING AROUND,

MRS. CIBRIANS, IT WAS LIKE--
- OH, REALLY?

WELL,
APRIL FROM TOLEDO SAID,

"CAMILLE, AFTER TAKING SUCH
A MEDIA BASHING LAST SEASON,

DID YOU MAKE A CALCULATED CHOICE
TO ACT DIFFERENTLY THIS SEASON?

- NO, IT'S WHO I AM.
THIS SEASON IS ME,

AND LAST SEASON,
I WAS UNDER A LOT OF PRESSURE.

MY HUSBAND
WAS CHEATING ON ME.

- COME ON. I KNOW,
BUT BEYOND THAT--

- OKAY.
- SO YOU'RE GONNA HANG

THE WHOLE THING ON...
- MY--

- KELSEY CHEATING ON YOU
LAST SEASON?

- UM, NO, I'M NOT GONNA
HANG THE WHOLE THING ON IT.

UM, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO KNOW?
ASK ME EXACTLY.

- WELL, NO, I MEAN--
- GIVE ME A SPECIFIC,

AND I'LL GIVE YOU AN ANSWER.
GO FOR IT.

- I THINK IT SEEMS LIKE
YOU PROBABLY MADE A LITTLE MORE

OF A CALCULATED EFFORT TO MAYBE
SHUT DOWN A LITTLE MORE.

- WELL, I'M NOT KISSING
MY FRIEND ON THE LIPS ANYMORE.

NICK, THAT WAS A BIG THING.
- RIGHT, RIGHT.

- AND A LOT OF PEOPLE WERE LIKE,
"OH, MY GOD,

HOW COULD YOU KISS HIM?"
- I KNOW! [laughs]

- SO--"OH! IT'S SO AWFUL."
- RIGHT.

- SO I MADE A CALCULATED MOVE
NOT TO KISS ANY MEN ON THE LIPS

ON CAMERA THIS SEASON.
[laughter]

- I'M GLAD YOU SAID, "MEN."
- OKAY?

- YOU HAVE CHANGED
SINCE, I THINK, LAST SEASON.

- UM, I'VE BEEN HUMBLED.
I WENT THROUGH A LOT, TOO.

I'VE BEEN HUMBLED, YES.
I AM DEFINITELY HUM--

- HOW DO YOU THINK SHE'S--
HOW DO YOU THINK SHE'S CHANGED--

- WHEN SHE SAYS,
"I'VE BEEN HUMBLED,"

I THINK SHE'S
MUCH, KIND OF,

UM, SHE WOULDN'T SAY
THE THINGS SHE SAID LAST YEAR.

I DON'T THINK
SHE WOULD BE SAYING,

"THESE HOUSES,
AND THIS NANNY--"

I--I MEAN,
I THINK SHE'S KIND OF--

MAYBE WHEN KELSEY LEFT,
I THINK IT CHANGED HER.

- UH, KAYLA FROM TEMPE,
ARIZONA,

ASKS THE MILLION-DOLLAR
QUESTION.

"CAMILLE, I'M GLAD YOU'RE
IN A HAPPIER STATE OF MIND NOW,

"BUT LET'S FACE IT,
YOU'RE KIND OF BORING.

HAVE YOU TRIED TOO HARD
TO AVOID ANY DRAMA?"

DID YOU TRY TO AVOID
THE DRAMA?

- I DON'T KNOW IF I TRIED--
YOU KNOW WHAT?

MAYBE I MADE
A CONSCIOUS EFFORT TO TRY

[laughing] TO AVOID
SOME OF THE DRAMA THIS YEAR.

- YOU WERE VERY QUIET
UNTIL THE TEA PARTY.

- I WAS QUIET.
- YES.

- WHAT DO YOU THINK, LADIES,
HAS CAMILLE PLAYED IT TOO SAFE?

- NO, I REMEMBER GAME NIGHT,
WE WERE LIKE,

JUMP UP, YELL, AND
ALL OF A SUDDEN, CAMILLE'S LIKE,

[whizzing sound]
[laughter]

AND I WAS LIKE, "HEY, WAIT."
- AND--AND I--

- SHE WAS UP IN THE BATHROOM
SOMEWHERE.

- I HID IN THE BATHROOM.
- SHE HID IN THE BATHROOM.

[laughter]

- DID YOU HIDE IN THE BATHROOM
AT GAME NIGHT?

- NO, AT MY PARTY SHE HID--
IN THE MALIBU PARTY

SHE HID, TOO.
- OH.

- OKAY, TWICE I'M GUILTY
OF HIDING IN THE BATHROOM.

- WHAT DO YOU LADIES THINK
IS THE REAL CAMILLE?

IS IT SEASON ONE CAMILLE?
- THIS ONE.

- I CAN TELL YOU, I DEFINITELY
THINK THIS IS THE REAL CAMILLE.

SHE'S SWEET, AND SHE'S KIND,
AND SHE'S FUNNY,

AND SHE'S A GOOD MOM.
- DEFINITELY.

- COMING UP NEXT...

OH, SO YOU THINK
THAT THERE'S A POSSIBILITY

THAT THIS COULD BE
A MURDER?

- MIA FROM DETROIT SAYS,

"TAYLOR, YOUR LIPS
DON'T SEEM AS LARGE

"AS THEY WERE
IN SEASON ONE.

DID YOU HAVE ANY WORK DONE, OR
AM I JUST GETTING USED TO THEM?"

[laughter]
- I--SHE MUST JUST BE

GETTING USED TO THEM.
IT'S AN IMPLANT,

THEY'RE NOT GOING AWAY.
I'M SORRY,

I KNOW IT'S PAINFUL TO LOOK AT
FOR PEOPLE,

BUT I'M STUCK WITH THEM, MAN.
- OH.

[overlapping chatter]
- [laughs]

- NO, THAT'S NOT WHAT--
- YOU WEAR LIGHTER LIPSTICK.

- AND I THINK MAYBE ALSO
I'VE GAINED A LITTLE WEIGHT,

SO MAYBE MY FACE IS FULLER,
SO THE LIPS SEEM SMALLER.

- [laughs]
- THAT'S INTERESTING.

- BY SEASON THREE
I'LL BE 300 POUNDS,

AND PEOPLE WILL BE LIKE,
"WHY ARE HER LIPS SO SKINNY?"

[both laugh]
- THAT'S FUNNY.

- AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T GAIN
YOUR WEIGHT IN YOUR LIPS, RIGHT?

- [laughing] EXACTLY.
- RIGHT. NOT POSSIBLE.

- NO.
- IT IS FUNNY,

BECAUSE I--YOU KNOW, LAST YEAR
YOUR LIPS WERE SUCH A HUGE--

NO PUN INTENDED--
- RIGHT.

POINT OF CONVERSATION.
NOW THEY REALLY JUST, YOU KNOW,

EVERYONE'S SENSE OF NORMAL
GETS DIFFERENT

WHEN YOU
GET USED TO SOMETHING.

- YEAH, I'M HAPPY TO SCREW UP
EVERYONE'S NORMAL.

[laughter]
- VERY GOOD.

- TAYLOR, WE MENTIONED EARLIER
THAT YOU JUST FINISHED A BOOK.

- TRUE.
- WHY'D YOU WRITE IT?

- I WAS JOURNALING
THROUGHOUT MY THERAPY,

AND THEN WHEN I WAS
READING BACK THROUGH IT,

I JUST RECOGNIZED, THERE WERE
A LOT OF PATTERNS IN MY LIFE,

FROM THE TIME I WAS LITTLE,
THAT ALLOWED ME TO BE

IN CONTROLLING RELATIONSHIPS,
AND I THOUGHT

GIRLS WITH LOW SELF-ESTEEM
COULD USE A LITTLE BOOST, SO--

- WHEN DID THE ABUSE
IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP START?

- WHEN I WAS PREGNANT.
- MMM.

- SO ABOUT
5 1/2 YEARS AGO?

- MM-HMM.

- AND CONTINUED
ALL THE WAY THROUGH?

- YEAH, I MEAN,
EVERY SIX WEEKS OR SO.

- WHY DID YOU NOT REPORT IT
OR LEAVE?

- WELL, I DIDN'T REPORT IT,
'CAUSE I DIDN'T WANT

HIM TO GO TO JAIL--
I LOVED HIM,

AND HE WOULD ALWAYS TELL ME,
"GO AHEAD, CALL THE POLICE.

"I'LL GO TO JAIL, YOU AND
KENNEDY WILL BE ON THE STREET.

I'LL BANKRUPT YOU, I'LL SUE YOU
UNTIL YOU HAVE NOTHING."

AND ALSO, THERE'S VISITATION,
YOU KNOW.

CAMILLE'S BEEN THROUGH IT,
ONCE YOU GET DIVORCED,

YOU'VE GOT TO SEND YOUR KIDS
TO THIS PERSON.

AND SO NOW I KNOW
THAT THIS PERSON

HAS A VOLATILE TEMPER,
AND I NEED TO SEND KENNEDY

TO SPEND THE NIGHT
WITH HIM?

- ALSO, YOU WERE--
CAN I SAY THIS?

I THINK SCARED TO PRESS CHARGES,
TOO, BECAUSE THEN SHE KNEW

HE WOULDN'T BE ABLE
TO MAKE A LIVING.

- TRUE.
- THAT WOULD, YOU KNOW,

HE WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO WORK
AFTER THAT,

ONCE PEOPLE KNEW THAT, AND
SHE HAS A CHILD TO TAKE CARE OF.

- HOW FAR BACK
HAD TAYLOR BEEN TELLING

ALL OF YOU THAT SHE WAS
IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP?

WHEN DID SHE OPEN UP TO YOU
ABOUT THIS? ADRIENNE?

- I THINK AFTER, UM,
A FEW MONTHS,

SHE STARTED TELLING ME
ABOUT HER HUSBAND.

AND I WAS CONCERNED,
VERY CONCERNED,

AND, UM, TO THE POINT WHERE
I SAID, "WELL, WHAT CAN WE DO?

HOW--YOU KNOW, WHY--
HOW CAN YOU LEAVE HIM?"

UM, THIS WAS
AN ONGOING THING.

- TAYLOR, YOU WROTE IN THE BOOK
THAT ADRIENNE THOUGHT THAT

THE SHOW WOULD BE A GOOD WAY
FOR YOU TO MAKE MONEY,

SO THAT YOU COULD ULTIMATELY
LEAVE RUSSELL.

- TRUE. YOU KNOW,
SHE WAS LIKE,

"YOU HAVE TO FIND
YOUR OWN WAY OUT OF THIS,

AND YOU'RE NOT GONNA BE ABLE
TO MAKE ENOUGH TO GET OUT," SO--

- I'VE HEARD YOU SPEAK ABOUT
WHEN YOU FOUND RUSSELL'S BODY,

HE LEFT A SUITCASE NEXT TO HIM.
- A BRIEFCASE, YES.

- A BRIEFCASE.
WHAT WAS IN THAT?

- UH, SEVERAL FILES
THAT CONTAINED THINGS

THAT I KNEW NOTHING ABOUT.
UM, TEN DIFFERENT BANK ACCOUNTS,

AN OFFICE
IN RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL,

THAT I NEVER KNEW ABOUT.

FLASH DRIVES
THAT I HAVE YET TO OPEN,

BECAUSE I'M AFRAID
THAT THEY MAY CONTAIN DOCUMENTS

THAT, ONCE I TOUCH THEM,
I'LL BE SUED FOR.

I MEAN, HE WAS--

UM...

HE HAD A LOT OF THINGS GOING ON
THAT I DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT.

- HE WAS IN
SEVERE FINANCIAL TROUBLE.

- APPARENTLY, YEAH.

- AND NOW YOU ARE.
- TRUE.

- BECAUSE YOU WERE
STILL MARRIED.

- CORRECT.

- RIGHT AFTER
RUSSELL'S DEATH,

HIS BUSINESS ASSOCIATE
ALSO COMMITTED SUICIDE.

- MM-HMM.

- DO YOU THINK THE TWO
WERE RELATED?

- I HAVE NO IDEA
WHAT THE LINK IS.

THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT THINK
THERE'S MORE TO IT THAN I KNOW,

AND THEY'VE ASKED ME
TO COME AND MEET WITH THEM.

I MEAN, IF--

I HATE TO SAY IT, BUT
IT WOULD GIVE ME GREAT SOLACE

TO THINK THAT THIS WAS
AT THE HANDS OF SOMEONE ELSE,

AS OPPOSED TO MY HUSBAND
BEING IN SUCH DESPAIR

THAT HE TOOK HIS OWN LIFE.

- OH, SO YOU THINK
THAT THERE'S A POSSIBILITY

THAT THIS COULD BE
A MURDER?

- NEXT WEEK,

IT'S THE REAL HOUSEWIVES
OF BEVERLY HILLS REUNION.

- SHE'D KIND OF
BEEN POKING ALL EVENING.

- ME?
- YEAH, YOU.

- HE GRABBED ME,
THREW ME IN THE POOL,

HELD ME UNDER UNTIL I WAS
ALMOST DROWNING.

[laughter]
- DID YOU KNOW? 25,000.

[laughter]

- SHE SAYS, "I WANT TO
SLEEP WITH YOUR HUSBAND."

- I DO.

- THAT'S WHAT SHE SAYS.

- WE HUGGED EACH OTHER,
AND WE HELD EACH OTHER

FOR THE FIRST TIME
IN YEARS.

- CAN YOU TELL US
WHAT YOU SOUGHT TREATMENT FOR?

- YEAH, I--

I'M AN ALCOHOLIC.

- TO LEARN MORE
ABOUT THE HOUSEWIVES,

GO TO BRAVOTV.COM.