All language subtitles for hope.and.faith.s03e05.hdtv.xvid-tcm

Okay, birds are thawing salads, chopping
taters, peeling dinners on a fast

track. High fives all around.

Or just stare at me like I'm a lunatic.

How long before we're visiting her on
Saturday afternoons?

Okay, I'm going to the mall.

Not the one with the bar in it.

return to take Justin to soccer
practice.

Mom, I didn't get my driver's license so
that I could play chauffeur to some

garden gnome.

We prefer to be called gnomish
Americans.

Fine, fine.

You know what? Just lay face down in the
back seat so no one can see you.

At least it's not the trunk again.

What's wrong?

Crack my tooth at the movies.

You know, if they're going to call them
jawbreakers, they should put some sort

of warning label on them.

You think?

You should have Charlie take a look at
that.

Yeah, right.

He hates me. If I sit in that chair of
his, he's going to go all marathon man

me.

Okay, first off, you have no idea the
damage that movie has done to the dental

community.

And Charlie is going to be insulted if
you go to someone else.

Hey, Oney.

Hey.

And a poultry shall grow from the face
of the devil.

For your information, my teeth hurt.

And now my eyes have joined them.

Charlie, you really should take a look
at Faith's tooth. She's in serious pain.

Oh, that's awful.

Put her food in a blender and give her a
straw.

Oh, hey, Charlie. There's something on
your foot.

I have no idea how your relationship
sunk this low, but it is time we started

acting like a family.

Now come on, make up.

Both of you.

Make up or dinner gets it.

Hope not the chicken.

Yeah, leave the bird alone.

She had nothing to do with this.

Turn a...

Here's what's going to happen.

Charlie, you are going to do your sister
-in -law's dental work, and Faith, you

are going to put your trust in your
brother -in -law.

Fine.

I'll let you work on my teeth.

Congratulations.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to
write a letter to the Jawbreaker people.

And just for added effect, I think I'll
tell them that I found an ear in one of

them.

I know what you're thinking.

Sell those to the tabloids and suddenly
you're sipping mojitos and Cozumel.

These eyes see everything, sister.

I have no idea who you are.

Let's keep it that way.

And put that damn mirror back.

You certainly made friends among the
office staff.

You're not out of here in an hour.
They're threatening a hunger strike.

I've seen your office staff.

I'm doing them a favor.

Novocaine should have taken by now.

Do you feel numb?

I think so.

Let's see what the mouth of a hellhound
looks like.

Ow! Oh, you can still feel that?

I gave you plenty of Novocaine.

I have a high tolerance for drugs.

Back in the late 80s, I toured with
Motley Crue.

Well, can't give you another shot. I
guess I could give you some nitrous

What does that do?

It'll put you in a twilight sleep.

Might make you a little babbly. I will
wake up, won't I?

Yeah.

of promised hope.

Count backwards from ten, please.

Ten.

Nine.

Eight.

I wonder what she'd look like with a
shaved head.

Thirty -four.

Huh?

I'm thirty -four.

says I'm 25, but I'm a liar.

A beautiful, beautiful liar.

Oh, this is going to be interesting.

So, Faith, how does it feel to be a
washed -up actress?

Oh, I'm not washed up.

I still got it, but I didn't deserve to
win that Emmy.

Then how come you won?

Because it's Hollywood. You don't have
to be good.

I love you, Charlie.

What?

I know it sounds weird, but I think
you're so hot.

Oh, God.

If you can hear this, open up the earth
and take me.

Fine, it's a piece of cake. Walk in the
park, dance in the clouds.

See? You made a big deal out of nothing.

That's right. It was nothing. Nothing
happened. Nothing was said. Just the

blood and suction.

Well, I think that's just great. You
finally set aside all your pettiness

faith and you're starting to heal your
relationship.

Come here, you silly, sexy orthodontist.
Give me a kiss.

I floss.

Oh, Dr. Shanowski, you are one kick -ass
mouth man.

I just took the temporary crown on a
little test drive on a ginormous box of

peanut brittle. Now, I may hurl, but
this baby handled like a beauty.

Look at you two, acting all civilized to
each other. I love this.

I'm beaming. Am I beaming?

So, my man, when do I come in for my
permanent crown?

No, no permanent crown.

You don't need a permanent crown. That's
just a dental scam so we can charge

people for a second visit.

I'm sick about the whole thing. Let's
never talk again.

What's going on with you?

Nothing. I'm just all booked up, okay?
And I can't just squeeze her in because

she's your sister.

Oh, honey.

You're constipated again, aren't you?

This is about faith and how she always
expects the whole world to revolve

her, and it doesn't. You see?

I've been perfect. nice to him. I sat in
his chair and I let him work on a pair

of famous teeth.

And this is how he treats me?

Hope, I'll be taking dinner in my room
tonight and the usual scented oils for

bath.

Why are you being such a jerk to Faith?

Me? Did you see her, the way she was
treating me?

Oh, yeah.

Showering you with praise on your dental
work.

Let's just drop it.

You know what gets me?

You know, I always thought it was Faith
that was the source of the tension

between you two, but it's not her.

It's you.

You know what?

You may be good at your work, but you're
a very bad man.

Oh.

Hey.

Just get a snack.

I'll be out of your way in a second.

I'm sorry about before.

Yeah, well, you kind of threw me.

I thought my cracked molar had patched
things up between us.

Actually, it was your lower right second
bicuspid. It's a common mistake among

non -pros.

Or non -geeks.

Listen, Hope called me on some things.

So why don't you come by tomorrow and
I'll take care of it.

Thanks.

So how about tonight?

You take care of this.

What are you doing?

Come here, you silly, sexy, tooth
monkey.

No! Don't touch me, Faith!

get off the ground?

And why'd you kick me?

Sorry. I guess I got a touch of restless
leg syndrome.

You know, RLS.

All right.

Did you say faith?

Please, I just got the legs under
control.

Night.

You said faith.

You kicked me out of bed, and you said
faith.

It's a symptom of RLF.

Very serious. We really do need a
telethon.

I wasn't going to say anything, but when
I put Faith under her, she sort of

blurted out that she... She loved me.

What? That's right. Came right out and
said it in that annoying, breathy way of

hers.

I love you, Charlie.

I'm sorry, honey.

I know that's hard to hear.

tactics. You throw the rock at the boy
you like. She obviously is harboring

sort of secret crush on me.

Why is it so hard to believe?

I'm an attractive guy. I get compliments
on a semi -daily basis. Daily basis

during the summer when the sun streaks
my hair and looks all sea -crest.

share this bed with you if you don't
believe me.

No, Charlie.

Don't be like that.

In fact, I'm rearranging the

pillows for that thing you like.

Okay.

You've got five minutes. Wow me.

come down yet because uh i don't want to
tempt her

charlie let it go okay

you don't believe me i'm gonna prove it
to you you watch her body language when

she comes down here to feed right well
when she throws you on the table to have

her way with you try not to squash the
pancake

She's shameless.

Okay, this may be one of the lowest
moments in our marriage.

Milk?

If you're trying to get back on my good
side, you can forget it.

I'm still mad at you for blowing off my
follow -up. Not that I look forward to

having your stubby little sausage
fingers in my mouth again.

I see it now.

Why don't you two go get a room?

Could you drop this off at the cleaner?

Dad, we're eating.

Oh.

Is that organic?

Is this organic?

When do we start getting this?

when he took his shirt off.

This is ridiculous.

Faith is not attracted to you.

And you know how I feel about checked
hair in the kitchen.

Yeah, this is all wrong.

Finally. There's no way she's going to
display her affection in front of her

sister, her rival.

Please, tell me this train is headed
back to the station.

We have got to recreate the conditions
where she first said what she said.

I know I'm right about this.

Follow me into the fire.

Faith, you know I said you didn't need a
permanent crown?

Well, I was wrong.

Really? You just come by after
breakfast. I'll put you under. It'll be

quick.

Can I open my eyes now?

Is the shirt back on?

It's all clear.

Can I just go on the record as saying
how unethical and stinky I think this

It's completely above board. She really
does need to work, and I had to put her

under anyway. Come on.

This stuff is like truth syrup.

Once she starts blabbing, she won't be
able to filter herself at all.

So she'll pretty much be the way she is
when she's awake.

I smell detergent.

Is Hope here?

I'm out of here.

You know what?

Two years ago, when you stood in front
of your colleagues and you accepted the

Golden Drill Award, I was so proud of
you.

But now I'm ashamed.

Ashamed to have that award hanging in
our bathroom.

your ankle bracelet in high school hall.

I sold it for beer money.

Beer's good.

Makes ugly men pretty.

That was my favorite bracelet.

Pull up a chair.

The show's just starting.

And then at your sweet 16 party, while
you were organizing the sack race, I

out with Bobby Chandler.

He was my boyfriend.

You had a sack race at your 16th
birthday party?

It was a hoedown, all right.

Look, this isn't about Faith and Hope
and the saddest birthday party ever.

It's about Faith and Charlie.

Charlie's here?

I love Charlie.

He's so damn handsome.

There, you see? I'm not crazy. I'm
handsome.

And I'm not... crazy.

But how could that be?

You hate Charlie and you're always so
mean to him.

Mean to him?

I've never even met him.

Exactly which Charlie are we talking
about?

Charlie Gibson.

The sexiest morning show host.

It's me.

From Good Morning America. Stay tuned.
We'll be right back.

Okay. So she doesn't love you now. But
I'm sure she will. Come summer, when

hair gets all sea -crest.

All right, all right. The show's over.

You've got a permanent crown to put in.

You've got twice as much hair as Charlie
Gibson.

For what it's worth,

you're still dead.

Dexy is Charlie in my world.

You promise, and I mean promise, that
you won't say anything to her about

that Faith will have a field day with
it.

My lips are sealed.

Seal! I slept with Seal in San Diego.

Oh, I hope she's talking about the
singer.

All fuzzy when it comes to keeping
secrets from Faith.

Can't believe I let you sleep with me.

I can understand why you thought I was
talking about you.

It's the fantasy life of a desperate
man.

Yeah, well, my fantasy actually involves
you.

And a hiking accident.

Really? Yeah.

Well, why don't you take your shirt off
again, because I haven't vomited yet

today.

How frustrating it is when two people
you love so much can't get along.

And I'm always caught in the middle.

You know what? I wish you two would
just... Ah, forget it.

Okay.

Wait.

I guess I could be nice to Faith.

Faith?

How are your teeth?

I hope you are feeling well.

I am feeling well.

It was kind of you to ask.

All right.

Well, that's a start.

I believe she bought that.

She's a simple woman.