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(Assistant) 'Can I help you, madam?'

(Woman) 'Yes, I'm looking for some satin ribbon.

'This is the sort of thing. It's a bit too bright.'

(Assistant) 'Well, we have a very large assortment here, madam.

'Is there anything you care for in this size?'

(Cacophony of female voices talking to shop assistants)

Escalators!

Oh, blimey, these stairs!

Hello...?

These girls!

(Bell rings)

All right, all right.

Morning, Joe.

- Morning. - Morning.

Merry Christmas, Joey boy.

Morning, Joe. How's the lumbago?

Murder.

My old man writes he's got it now.

- Is he coming home for Christmas? - Not him!

He got six months this time.

What a life, eh? Wish I was one of them shop girls.

Not at this time of year you wouldn't. Rushed off their feet they are.

Least they don't have to get up at half past five.

(Exterior bell rings)

(Internal bell rings)

(Alarm clock rings)

Oh, Suzy, you'll catch your death in that nightdress.

Why not wear pyjamas?

Don't be silly, I'm not the pyjama type.

That's why he chose it for me. He understands girls.

(Ringing)

Come on now, Moira, wake up.

(Mumbles)

Oh, but it's Saturday and there's fishcakes for breakfast.

I couldn't care less!

(Buzzer)

Here you are, dear.

Oh, no thank you, Peggy. I don't want any.

Drink it. If you're not better tomorrow, I'm getting the doctor.

- No, please, Peggy. - Then drink up that tea.

Mm. I say, this thing's a blessing.

- Good old Leslie. - It's a wonderful present.

It ought to be, it's the only one I've had in three years!

A new dressing gown, Jen? I haven't noticed it before.

No, just got it cleaned.

(Chattering)

(Woman) Whoa!

(Woman) No room!

- The washbasin's free. - Oh, thanks.

Hello, Peggy. I won't be long.

- It's all right. - Did you have a good time last night?

Oh, don't talk about it. Leslie didn't turn up again as usual.

Another meeting of his beastly old car club.

How could I marry a man like that?

Never know whether I've been ditched for a red head or a drop-head.

- Get a move on in there! - Oh, get up earlier.

- Going to the staff party tonight, Su? - May do. See how Alex feels.

Oh, I shouldn't miss it if I were you. Smashing spread of food they have.

Oh, no, you don't! Back of the queue.

Waiting for the bath?

What do you think we're waiting for, a bus?

- Good morning, ladies. - (All) Morning, Mrs Morgan.

- The old hag. - Shh. She'll hear you.

Let her, the old bag.

She's always pinching my customers so I lose my commission.

Victimisation, I call it.

You vote Labour next time.

- Are you going to be in there all day? - Oh, shut up.

(Hums tune)

- Hey, Peggy...? - Yes?

Got any soap? I forgot mine.

What, again? Coming over...

(Chuckles) Right in the bread basket! Thank you.

Are you going to the party tonight with Leslie?

I expect so. Unless Bessie has a cough and he stays up with her all night.

- Bessie? - His beastly car.

What about you?

I expect I'll go with Maggie.

Shall I tell Leslie to bring a friend along?

No, please don't.

I like going with Maggie... she's a lot of fun.

But, Alice, it won't be any...

Anyhow, Suzy's boyfriend will bring someone.

(Suzy) Come on, you two.

Oh, come on.

Are you sure you've finished?

Maggie, if you want, you can wash my back for me.

Oh, Miss Pascoe?

You are not looking at all well this morning.

I...I feel all right, thank you, Mrs Morgan.

- Are you sure? - Yes.

(Singing and laughter)

Come along now, ladies, time's getting on.

(Suzy) Ow!

Shh, Suzy! She must have heard that.

Who cares? I shan't be here much longer.

My film test is quite definite now - next week.

No! Oh, that's lovely.

Mind you ask me to some of those Hollywood banquets.

Hey, listen, everyone, I've got a real bit of news for you.

Suzy is going to have a film test.

Oh, no. Not again.

Oh, it's definite this time... next Thursday.

And what did you have to do to get it, dear?

You need a mouthwash.

Mail's up!

(Excited chatter)

- Anything for me, please? - Yvonne? No, nothing.

- Are you sure? - Sorry.

Better face it, dear, he's given you the brush off.

- Now what have I said? - Too much, as usual.

Come along now, ladies, come along.

There's only fifteen minutes to opening time.

(All) Thank you, Mrs Morgan.

Yes, and we are likely to be extra busy today.

Never mind, girls. It's only five more shopping days till Christmas.

Only five more days (!) My poor feet will never stand it.

Yes, but look what you've all got to look forward to.

- What's that? - The sales!

- The old windbag. - Come on, let's get cracking.

(Car horn toots)

Morning, old dear.

- Well, notice anything? - What?

New windscreen. I fixed it last night.

- Nice surprise, eh? - I'm thrilled to bits (!)

- Hop in, I'll drive you. - Sure you can spare the time?

Well, of course. Hey, what's up? Are you mad about something?

Mad about something? Do you realise I haven't seen you for a week?

Go on, that's only seven days really anyway.

Look, darling, there was a club rally...

- Oh, blast the club! - Here, steady on, old dear.

And stop calling me your old dear. I'm not your old dear, this thing is!

Hey, steady, I only painted it last week.

Good, you can paint it again next week.

It's going to be different when we're married.

How different?

- Good morning, Miss Carter. - Good morning, children.

Looks like being a nice day.

Why, is someone going to burn the store down (!)

(Tyres screech)

We've been through all of this before, old dear... Er, sweetheart.

We can't possibly afford a marriage on my present salary.

We could if you gave up this broken-down old tank.

What, give up old Bessie? Are you serious?

Well, you can't afford to run both of us.

Yes, but hang it all. I'd be lost without Bessie.

Right. Then that lets me out.

Hey, mind that door.

Steady on, old dear.

And don't tell me you're going to break off our engagement again.

How can I? you haven't even given me a ring yet.

Peggy, wait! Wait!

Peggy!

Hey, wait a minute.

- Listen, I'm sorry. - You're always sorry.

We can't talk about it now, we'll talk about it tonight.

Why tonight?

The staff party. I'll pick you up about eight.

You never even asked me! You just take it for granted I'm going with you.

- Who else could you go with? - That's my business.

- I have made other arrangements. - What about me?

You can take Bessie.

What other arrangements could you have made? Listen.

- Morning, Judy. - Morning, everybody.

Hey, Mavis, give us a hand with this cover!

- Hello! - Ah, "Night of Love", eh?

- How much? - 35 shillings an ounce, darling.

Expensive night.

Hello.

Funny sort of girl, that. Always looks so browned off.

Aren't we all? Going to the fling tonight?

No, I, er...

Moira, do you know if there's any other type hanging around Peggy?

- Well, if you really want to know... - Mr Randall!

- We are just about to open. - Oh, are we?

In that case, I'd better get cracking.

Beg your pardon!

- Hello, Leslie. - Morning, all!

My, you smell expensive, Mr Randall.

Oh, "Night of Love".

Must've been!

- Come on, let's get going. - I'm waiting for the Dragon.

Hold on, wait for me!

Mrs Morgan, this dummy, most irregular.

Irregular, Mr Christopher?

I repeat, most...irregular to find a request for this in my office.

- You didn't have to attend to it yourself. - My staff is busy, this is Christmas!

I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I can't help you. We're awfully busy ourselves, too.

Come on, if you're coming!

All requests for dummies should've been in last week in triplicate!

(Bell rings)

Uh-oh, look out, everybody, it's feeding time.

(Man) Let me have a list of invoices, then...

(Clears throat)

- Very nice, Miss French. - Thank you, Mr Preedy.

If I might make a slight suggestion...

There. See what I mean?

Miss French, couldn't you and I have a little drink together some evening?

- I'm crazy about milk. - Rather good.

- Good morning, Mr Preedy. - Oh...morning, Mr Stanton.

- How's your wife? - Oh, she's fairly well, Mr Stanton.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll...

How are you liking it up here, Miss French?

Fine, thanks, Mr Stanton. It's nicer than the toy department.

Mr Preedy's put in a very good report about your work.

Really?

(Laughter)

Come on, Randall, we haven't all day to see these flats.

- Coming, Mr Ronson. - Come on.

Miss Carter, I'm an executive. I'm not used to dressing these things!

Surely even an executive has his moments.

But what will the customers think...?

If you're like this with a dummy, what would you be like with the real thing?

- Excuse me. Wedding dresses? - Just over there, madam.

Thank you very much. Go on, love.

Men must be losing the art of saying no!

Can I help you, madam?

Oh, yes, my daughter's getting married.

- Oh, is it a white wedding, madam? - Of course!

- What have you got in white satin? - (Stuffed-up) White nylon.

Now, Eunice, we had all that out before we came!

- Nobody wears white nylon! - But they do, we sell lots.

- There you are, you see? - White satin!

Very well, madam, a white satin wedding gown.

(Eunice) White nylon. (Mother) Satin!

Step this way, madam, I'll show you some styles...

- White nylon... - Shut up!

That's all right, Miss Green. I'll attend to the lady.

I know what will suit your daughter.

- I know what the lady wants... - I'll have our mannequin show it.

- Miss Carter? - Yes, Mrs Morgan?

A Model 103, please.

Here we go again.

When you're through with this, help me into mine.

All right.

Miss Carter!

I think you'll be delighted with this gown. We've had many satisfied customers.

(Mother) Thank you.

Thank you, Mrs Morgan, I can manage now.

No, you can go and help Miss Carter.

We won't keep you a moment, madam.

- The old hag! - Which one?

Morgan. See how she pinched my customer again?

- That's her privilege. - She's the supervisor.

I'll fix her one of these days. 25 quid, this costs.

That's 25 tuppences I'd have got. Halfway to getting those earrings I want.

Well, here goes. I've put this on so many times, I feel like the Bartered Bride!

Ah, here we are, madam.

You look wonderful.

- You should be the one getting married. - Wouldn't work, honey.

10 to 1 I'd walk up to the altar and turn round for the prospective customer.

- Oh, it's lovely. - But I want nylon!

I'm so glad you like it. We think it's one of our nicest models.

Mrs Morgan, I must have a word with you, please!

Excuse me for one moment.

Mr Christopher, you are naughty. What is it now?

Mrs Morgan, the model you've given me is a 32. The dummy is a 36!

Then get another dummy!

But they're all downstairs and the place is packed with people!

I can't help your troubles, I have worries enough of my own.

(Sighs heavily)

At her age, too! Cheeky little monkey.

"I work my fingers to the bone," I said,

"but if you think I make enough to teach you to dance, you're making a mistake."

Flapping about on stage and showing off her legs!

Get her into the civil service.

Takes no training, cos they've nothing to do.

(Clears throat)

You're right, dear.

If you've nothing to do, you can't do it wrong.

I want a strong bone belt, outsize.

Just coming, madam.

See what I mean about the civil service? A customer would never speak to you

like that in the Post Office.

(Chatter and shrill shouting)

Miss? Miss? Miss?

One moment.

- I want the darker shade. - We don't have the darker shade.

Miss?

Miss?

- Miss, how much is this soap? - 7s and 11d.

(Indistinct shouting)

- (Woman) What about this soap? - Madam, I'm doing my best...

(Dialling)

(Inserts coin)

Hello, is Mr Blayburn there, please? Mr Michael Blayburn?

Who is that, please?

Oh, Miss Pascoe? Just a minute, please.

It's her again, madam.

All right, I'll talk to her.

Mrs Blayburn speaking. Who is that, please?

Oh...it's Miss Pascoe. Yvonne Pascoe.

I just wanted to ask about Michael.

Where is he? I've got to get in touch with him.

All right, Jenny. That'll do.

I'm sorry, Miss Pascoe, but I'm quite unable to help you.

(Sound muffled by glass)

(Woman singing)

What about you, Eve? Going home for Christmas?

Home? I don't really know.

I must be getting back.

Why does she have to be so flipping mysterious?

She doesn't live with her family, why isn't she at the hostel?

- Wouldn't you like to know? - I'm not the only one.

She's not married, that's for sure.

- How do you know? - No ring!

You should've been the store detective!

I bet she has a good time on the quiet, one of those femme fatale types.

I wish they weren't so stingy with these biscuits.

Excuse me, Maggie.

What's the matter, Yvonne? Michael?

Had a row?

Michael left home two months ago. I haven't heard from him since.

He told me he was leaving his mother to find a job.

- Can't she tell you where he is? - She hates me.

Don't worry. Maybe he's waiting till he's got a job, then he'll write.

I'm desperate, Peggy. I must find out where he is.

You know what I'd do?

You'd probably do something quite crazy.

Well, I'm all for doing something.

Why don't you go and see the old buzzard?

- Do you think it would do any good? - I certainly do.

- Anyway, she can't eat you. - There she is!

You better get cracking, Yvonne. Moira's creating like mad up there.

I didn't know it was so late.

Take a look at those earrings? Pretty nifty, eh?

Yes. A little flashy, don't you think?

For you, maybe. Not everybody can wear them.

- Hello, Suzy. - What do you want?

Like me to take you to the dance tonight?

- What in? Your pram? - I got a motorbike now.

- Then take that. I've got a date. - Oh...

Here, hold on though. My friend hasn't got a partner yet.

Well, never mind, there's still time.

Cheek! Imagine a punk like that thinking I'd go with him!

- What's up? - Nothing.

Did you ask Alex about bringing a friend along?

Sorry, dear, I clean forgot about it last night.

Hold onto this, and I'll ring the studios now.

(Wolf whistles)

- (Woman) 'Hello?' - Hello, is that Pinetree Studios?

I'd like to speak to Mr Fraser, please?

'Calling Mr Fraser!

'Calling Mr Fraser!

'Calling Mr Fraser!

'Calling Mr Fraser!'

Hello? Yes, Fraser, here.

Who? Alex Fraser?

Just a minute, hang on.

- Alex? - Yeah?

Call for you. A skirt.

- Yeah? - Is that you, Alex? It's Suzy.

Didn't I tell you not to call me here?

I don't care, I'm right in the middle of a picture!

Oh, for crying out loud! Is that all?

I'm up to my neck! I can't find boyfriends for your deadbeats!

Oh, sorry, Alex. Just forget it.

- Pick me up at the hostel tonight? - Sure, that's what I arranged, didn't I?

Now ring off, and don't bother me again when I'm working.

(Man) Quiet!

We'll have it despatched to you first thing on Monday.

- Can I help you, sir? - As a matter of fact, you can!

- Are you mad? - Yes, flaming mad!

What happened last time Preedy caught you here?

- He went a shade of purple. - And I nearly got reported, so go away!

All right for Stanton to talk to you, though.

- What do you mean? - I saw you smooching around earlier.

- Well...what of it? - Nothing. You just looked pretty silly.

- Oh, you did, did you? - Yes, I did.

Making eyes at a man old enough to be your father.

He's not! And even if he were, it's no business of yours!

- Oh? - Anyway, he's a very attractive man.

Don't tell me, he's the "other arrangement" for tonight?

- Yes, as a matter of fact, he is. - What?

Come here.

Now, look. Have you really been going out with him?

What if I have?

You ought to be ashamed, going out with an old fossil like that.

- He's not an old fossil. - Ha! You think he's in love with you.

He is!

In a nice sort of way, that is.

I'm very fond of him.

- He's different from other men I know. - Different?

Yes, he prefers girls to cars.

It's high time you and I had a little talk.

- Meet in the canteen for lunch. - Sorry.

I'm otherwise engaged.

With...er...him?

We lunch together as often as we can, dear Philip.

- He can't see enough of me. - Uh-oh?

Erm...where are you lunching?

Oh, the usual place we go.

- The Brasserie? - Brasserie?

Across the street, that's where he usually goes.

- Is it? - Yeah.

Oh...yes, that's the place.

Well, I might lunch there today, so I'll see you both.

- Don't you dare! - Try and stop me.

- It's a public restaurant. - If I catch you snooping...

Well, you'll be sorry. Now let me get on with my work.

Oh, blast! There goes Preedy's pen.

Must be under the bed. I'll get it.

(Preedy) Ah, there you are, Miss French.

- This lady would like to see some beds. - Beds?

That's right, beds. Double beds.

- Would you like...? - I like this one.

This is one of the most comfortable beds on the market.

It's a SleepRite with a SnoozeTite mattress.

- Is it well-sprung? - With reinforced DreamNite springs.

(Chuckles)

In the next room we have some wonderful beds with...

I must say, it does seem fairly well-sprung.

I don't put much faith in this modern stuff.

It'll stand up to almost anything, madam. I'll show you.

The demonstration's gone quite far enough, thank you, Miss French.

- Would you like to see other beds? - How much is this?

- £55, madam. - Oh, dear. Isn't everything expensive?

- I'll talk it over with my husband first. - Very well.

I'll come again on Monday.

Miss French... I should be very angry with you.

We have had two firm orders already.

Have we? Good. Well done.

- Have you seen my pen anywhere? - It's not here, Mr Preedy.

- You must've left it at home. - I know I brought it with me.

Must've dropped down somewhere.

Under the bed, I should think.

Oh!

Hello, Mr Preedy.

Going to lunch, too?

No, I'm going to see her. You're right, it's the only thing to do.

- Will you have time? - I shall have to risk that.

It's cold today.

Peggy, if I can't get back in time,

would you ask Moira to carry on for me, just this once?

- Of course. - Thanks.

Good luck!

- Table for one, madam? - Er...I'm just looking for someone.

- Oh, there he is. - Mr Stanton? Is he expecting you?

Well, not exactly.

I'm going to surprise him, I think.

- Can I share, Mr Stanton? - What? Oh?

Oh, of course, Miss French.

Thank you.

- It's so crowded. - Is it?

Er...outside, I mean.

Oh, yes.

I don't think I've seen you her before, Miss French.

- I often come here with Mr Stanton. - Who? What?

- I mean, I often come here, Mr Stanton. - Oh...

Can I take your order, madam?

I'll just whatever Mr Stanton's having.

Oh...

Don't let me disturb you. Carry on as if I weren't here.

Yes, there is an article I wanted to read...

- Shall we have some wine? - Wine?

- Yes. - Thank you, but I don't drink at lunch.

Don't worry, this is on me.

Thank you. And we'll have some wine, please.

Shall I bring you the wine list, Mr Stanton?

Don't bother, Henry. Just bring half a bottle of Beaujolais, will you?

Make it a full bottle. You never know who's had the other half, do you?

(Peggy giggles)

- Are you celebrating something? - Yes, I've broken off my engagement.

(Stanton) Oh...

Well...here's how.

(Stanton) To your new-found freedom.

- Something to drink, sir? - Wine.

- A Beaujolais, sir? - Ah, bow le jay, to you!

- Enjoying your wine, Miss French? - Hmm. This is fun.

If anyone saw us like this, I should be in serious trouble.

Oh?

The worst crime a personnel manager can commit is to fraternise with the staff!

I'm afraid I didn't realise. Sorry... - No, no, no. Don't go.

I've decided to risk it.

(Bell rings)

Is Mrs Blayburn in?

- Yes, but I don't think she'll see you. - She must see me.

It's more than my job's worth to let you in. She's got it on for you.

Tell her I forced my way in. Tell her anything, only please help me.

All right, I'll try.

You'd better come in.

(Mrs Blayburn) Come in!

(Clocks chimes)

Oh, Miss? You can go in now.

Watch yourself.

(Squawking)

(Shrill squawking)

Do you mind shutting the door? There's a draught.

Mrs Blayburn, I must know where Michael is. I've got to see him.

Sit down, Miss Pascoe.

You should consider yourself a fortunate young woman.

- I could have sent for the police. - The police?

Yes, this persecution of myself and my son

has got to be stopped somehow.

I'm not persecuting you.

Michael's had to leave London to get away from you, Miss Pascoe.

- That's not true. - I'm afraid it is.

Michael loves me.

You're not the first young woman who's thought that.

Michael is foolishly susceptible.

There was a hairdresser's assistant once, I remember.

- And a florist. Such a pretty child. - I don't believe you.

And in each case, he tired of them just as quickly as he has of you.

You're a very cruel woman, Mrs Blayburn.

You know that Michael loves me,

and that he's gone away to look for a job so that we can be married.

And you know that when that happens, you will lose him.

You're impertinent, Miss Pascoe.

(Parrots shriek)

I'm sorry, I...I didn't mean to be.

But I must know where he is, I've got to get in touch with him.

When Michael went away, he said,

"Don't let her know my whereabouts, I'm sick to death of her."

- He didn't say that. - "I'm sick to death of her."

You're lying.

Then why hasn't he written to you?

He writes to me.

Now, come along, my pretty one. Come along.

I know you hate me.

I know you don't think I'm good enough for Michael.

Perhaps I'm not, but...

Well?

I'm going to have his baby.

So that's it?

That's what you were leading up to.

You little slut!

You may be having a baby, but it's not my son's child.

I know your sort. You go with any man! It could be anyone's child!

And you think you can blackmail him into marrying you. Well, you won't!

Now get out of my house! Get back to the streets where you belong!

(Parrots shriek)

Hello, sir.

Oh, hello, Mr Stanton. Had a good lunch?

A somewhat unusual one. Anything new?

Another complaint about Leslie Randall from Mr Preedy again.

Oh, dear, oh, dear. All right, let's have his record.

That was quick.

It gets so many black entries, it's hardly worth putting away.

"Randall, Leslie, M. Aged 29." Been with us for three years.

Record reads more like an indictment!

Hello, what's this?

Something he sent into the office a year ago, before your time.

"Exploitation and Publicity by Leslie Randall."

- "Exploitation and Publicity", eh? - I think it's rather good.

I'll read it, then. I'll soon find out if it's good or not.

- I'm an expert on those lines myself. - Really, sir?

I wrote a book about publicity. You must've read it.

Have I?

Oh, of course! Yes...

Leave this with me, then.

- A match, sir. - Thank you.

We could do with a good man in Publicity.

We certainly could, sir. If you'll excuse me, sir...

(Clamour of voices)

Pay at the desk, please, madam.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

Just a minute, please.

(Morgan) I've had very bad reports lately.

And today, she was 15 minutes late back from lunch without an explanation.

I really think that to keep her on would not only be detrimental to the store,

but it would set a bad example to the staff.

All right. Put it in your report. Now leave us, will you?

Very well, Mr Stanton.

Sit down.

Well, you seem to have been attracting quite a lot of attention.

- Is there anything you'd like to tell me? - No, nothing.

No reason for your behaviour?

Look, I want to help you.

You heard what she said, I'm not doing my job properly.

- That's all that concerns you, surely? - Not at all.

I'm much more concerned with why.

- Must there be a reason? - There generally is.

Find the cause and there may be a remedy.

No, there is no remedy.

- You're not well, are you? - I'm going to have a baby.

- And you're not married? - No.

- The father? - He's gone away.

I see. What about your family?

I have no family. They all died in the war.

(Horns blaring)

You will want me to leave, of course.

I'm afraid so. In your own interests, apart from anything else.

- The work here is too strenuous. - I understand. Is that all?

We'll make it two weeks' notice, give you time to find something else.

Something else? What else is there?

Why don't you go and see the Welfare people?

They'll take care of you until the time comes.

They'll also find a home for the child.

When it's over, come and see me,

and I'll arrange for you to have your old job back.

It'll be just as if nothing had happened.

Just as if nothing had happened...

Thank you. You've been very kind.

Damn this job!

- Sorry to interrupt your work, Randall. - That's all right, just finished!

- I have to send you on a special job. - What, me?

- Unfortunately there's no choice. - What's the job, sir?

We have to furnish a house for an associate of Mr Bunting's.

Bunting? Bunting? That name sounds familiar.

It's plastered all over the front of the store!

Ah, I knew I'd seen it somewhere, sir.

That's the address.

Please...please don't let anything go wrong.

You've nothing to worry about, Mr Ronson. Leave this to me.

- Oh, Randall? - Yes, sir?

There's just one thing you've forgotten.

What's that, sir?

The keys.

The keys...the keys...

My, my, every time I see you, you're with a different woman!

Oh, she's beautiful.

- There's only one thing wrong with her. - What's that?

- She's a redhead. - What's wrong with redheads?

Not a thing, if all you men say is true.

But it just so happens that redheads can't wear red.

You mean... You mean...?

I mean, the model we have to push is red.

(Sighs heavily)

Now wait a minute. Why do it the hard way?

This'll give you a head start!

See that? She pinched my customer again.

A silver I am gown, too. Think of the commission.

Never mind, Suzy.

If you haven't got enough for those earrings, I could lend you a pair.

That's all right, dear. I'll get them, or my name's not Suzy Green!

By the way, I got through to Alex.

- All his friends are busy tonight. - It doesn't matter.

- Well, well, look who's here. - Marge!

- Like it? - Ooh, smashing!

Me and Marge used to work together.

Easy on the "Marge", Suzy, it's Margo now.

- Where've you been working lately? - I haven't. I've got a friend.

And a flat and a car. The flat and the car are smashing!

- Are you being attended to, madam? - Thank you, I'm just looking round.

I see.

- What's that? - The old business, commission-swiping.

Oh, one of those. Poor you!

Hey, wait a minute. How would you like to buy a fur coat?

A fur coat? I don't think my friend's quite ready for that yet.

- I've only just got the pearls! - You don't really have to buy it.

Just keep her thinking you're going to. Get it?

- Sort of keep her occupied? - And how!

- Mrs Morgan? - Yes, Miss Green?

This lady wants to see the supervisor.

Of course. Can I show you anything, madam?

Well, I'm really looking for a fur coat.

Something expensive with a bit of class like...ermine?

- I know the very coat... - That's all right, I'll attend to this.

Come this way, madam, please.

Ha-ha!

(Knocking and ringing)

(Both) Good afternoon, I...

I was sent here to see about furnishings.

Well, I suppose you'd better come in.

- (Peggy) This is a nice room. - Yes.

- Enjoy your lunch? - Very much. Did you?

No. The mashed potatoes were cold.

- There's something I have to tell you. - You don't have to tell me anything!

Oh, you're impossible!

You went out with Stanton for lunch, let's leave it at that.

- Right! Let's leave it at that! - Right!

Wine, too, like a ruddy wedding breakfast.

Makes a change! You never think of ordering wine.

Why should I? I hate the stuff.

That's the trouble, it's always what you want.

(Whistles)

- It's obvious what he's after. - What do you mean?

No bloke thinking of marriage bothers to buy his girl wine.

How dare you suggest such a thing? He's not like that.

Ha-ha! Etchings will come next.

To show you how wrong you are, he does want to marry me.

- What? - And we're engaged.

Engaged! Where's the ring?

You forget, I'm used to doing without one.

- Well, congratulations. - Thanks!

I'm sure he'll make you a very good father.

What a way to finish up, married to a personnel manager!

Think you'd be a better catch?

I shan't always be in the Estates department.

I might go in for Sports or Hardware. Might have a great future in Hardware.

Oh, what's the use? All you can think about is silly cars.

Don't you understand? I want security. I want a proper home.

- You think I'd ask you to live in a tent? - No, a garage!

I might take this place if it were any use to us.

- What would you use for money? - Money? Ha-ha, money!

This would be a wonderful place for us.

Look, TV set here.

Little bar in the corner over there.

Piano here, yes?

- Radiogram beside the fireplace. - The other side of the fireplace.

- No, the points are this side. - I don't care!

You can't have a TV set, a piano and a radiogram all in this space!

Oh, Pegs...

(Sighs heavily)

It would be pretty nice, wouldn't it?

Pretty expensive, too.

You know how you love dancing? We'd have some smashing parties here.

(Peggy) What's the use in talking about it?

Just roll back the carpets and we'd have bags of room.

- Floor's not so hot. - Oh, I don't know, let's try it.

- Don't be a fool. - Why not? I'll switch on the radio.

Oh, sorry, the other side, isn't it?

(Mimics tuning whistle)

There you are, "Workers' Playtime" from a packing case factory.

(Both hum a waltz)

Thanks, darling.

- No! That was a dirty, rotten trick! - Trick? Damn it, I love you.

- No, you don't. - But I do!

- You won't even sell off your old car. - Don't start that again.

- (Doorbell rings) - Let me take you to the party tonight.

- I made other arrangements. - Well, cancel them.

- Hadn't you better answer the door? - What door?

- Somebody just rang. - Well, let 'em.

Oh, blimey! The customers!

Quick, they're going! We've got to stop them!

(Peggy) Not so fast!

(Randall) Just a minute, sir!

- Did you want to see the house, sir? - If thy can spare the time, lad.

Terribly, sorry. We were busy getting it ready, we didn't hear the bell.

- So I noticed. Come along, Earnest. - Not so fast, woman.

Might as well see it, now we've come this far.

Yes, do, woman! I mean, madam. It's just what you're looking for.

It better be. Or Mr Bunting will hear something from me.

You'll love this place, madam, it's a dream inside.

- Has it got central heating? - It's got everything. Wait till you see it.

Uh-oh, even got a self-locking door.

My, that's cunning.

Well?

- I've left the keys inside. - Leslie!

- And my scarf and gloves. - You're hopeless!

- Pegs... - Hopeless!

- You'll hear more of this, my boy. - Don't worry, lad.

I know what it's like to be out of a job. Look at me now.

(Tyres screech)

(Music over dialogue)

(Cacophony of voices)

- Excuse me... - Just a minute, sir.

Pay at the desk, please.

I'm looking for Miss Pascoe. I thought she worked here.

- So did I. 4s and 6d. - You don't know where I could find her?

Wish I did. She's been missing most of the afternoon.

- Miss? - Coming, madam.

I'm sorry, I've just got into town and I have to go away again...

- I was here before that man. - Yes, madam.

- Coming!

Will you give her this note when she comes back? It's important.

- Yes, yes. - Thank you.

- Here you are, sir. - Thank you.

Coming, madam!

Randall!

Mr Stanton wants to see you.

I'll leave him to you.

- I should sit down, Randall. - Thank you...sir.

You realise you've a perfectly shocking record here?

Well, just bad luck about those keys. Could happen to anyone, couldn't it?

Yes, but the fact remains that Ronson doesn't want you in Estates any longer.

Well, okay, okay.

(Stanton) But there is a job going in Publicity.

- There's what? - Suit you nicely, no keys.

Harder work, of course, but more money.

- £600 a year. - I...I'll take it.

Well, it's not absolutely definite.

By the way, Bunting's reading your scheme at the moment.

- He...he's what? - Reading your scheme.

- I've read it, I think it's good. - It ought to be, I took it out of his book.

You what?

His jolly little "Manual of Publicity & The Uses Thereof'.

- You pinched his ideas? - Not exactly, the book was lying around.

Then I've given him a rehash of his own book!

Well...roughly speaking, yes.

(Sighs)

I know you meant well, but you've put me in rather a spot.

You? What about me? I recommended you. He'll sack me for this.

Then we'll go out into the great wide world together hand in hand.

That's exactly what I've been looking for. It's not too tight round there?

Oh, no, madam. And the colour's just perfect for you.

- I'll take it. How much did you say? - 18 guineas, madam.

Another sale. At this rate, I'll have enough for six pairs of earrings!

And there's still half an hour till closing time.

And they're still at it, look!

I'd like something plainer, I think.

You said something plainer, madam?

That's right.

Well, nothing could be plainer than this, madam.

It's not really quite me, though, is it?

I did see a nice one in the window.

(Christopher) Miss Carter, one minute, please.

Is this all right?

It's perfect, Mr Christopher, just perfect.

- Well, thank heaven for that. - Now what are you going to do with it?

- Do with it? - You poor man, they didn't tell you?

- Didn't tell me what? - They decided not to push this model.

Pay at the desk, please, madam.

- Nice of you to show up. - Sorry, I felt ill.

Fine time to pick for it, I must say. Yvonne, I've got something for you...

Can I have attention, please?

I've called for my prescription. Is it ready yet?

I will see, madam.

Is this ready yet?

Here you are. Tell her to read the directions carefully.

They contain strychnine.

I'm sorry, madam. They're not ready.

Oh, dear, that really is too bad.

I shall have to come back on Monday.

Hey, Yvonne!

(Bell rings)

(Clock chimes)

(Bell stops)

- Know what time the dance starts? - You know what these things are like.

My poor old feet! I feel like an overdone suet pudding.

I heard that Leslie got the sack. Is it true?

- Where did you hear that? - One of the girls told me, Miss Marks.

Yvonne was hauled up, too. It's been quite a busy day.

Did you sneak on Yvonne?

So what? I wasn't going to miss my lunch for her or anybody else.

- Wasn't that nice of you? - Oh, grow up, dear.

Easy, kids, Save the strong-arm stuff for the wolves tonight.

- Don't pay any attention to her. - You make me tired!

- I got 'em, look! - What are they, curtain rings?

Earrings, you dope! The latest fashion.

- Where, in Basutoland? - See you tonight, Eve.

Over my dead body. Staff parties aren't my line.

- I see enough of your ugly mugs. - There's loads of lovely food.

No, thanks. I'll spend the evening curled up with a good bookmaker.

- Stuck-up so-and-so. - Oh, I dunno. I wish I was her.

She's so smart and glamorous. I bet she has a wonderful time.

She's probably found a rich friend like Marge.

- I think she's too nice for that. - Don't be so corny!

There's more ways than one of getting a man.

Yes...I suppose there is.

- Good evening, Mr Williams. - Good evening.

(Jazz music playing)

(Music stops)

- (Man) That you, Eve? - Yes, darling.

- Had a good day? - Oh, the usual. How about you?

Fine. Listening to the match. We gave the army a good trouncing.

It's a lovely evening. Why don't we go across the park for a drink?

- Just as you like. - I thought it might be fun for you.

I wish you weren't always thinking what would be fun for me.

All right, darling.

I'd like to go and have a drink. That better?

I'll go and have a bath and get some food.

You would tell me if you wanted to go somewhere on your own?

I never want to go anywhere without you, you great, stupid bully.

(Clamour of voices)

You look lovely, Alice.

- (Car horn blares) - That'll be Alex. Want a lift?

- Anything to get off my feet. - Manage one more?

- Hi, Alex - (Maggie whistles)

Evening, friends.

- Oh, it's the third you've had this year. - That's what they tell me.

- Pile in, girls, we haven't got all night. - Come on, Alice.

No, I'm all right.

- What's the matter? - I...er...I've got to make a call first.

- I'll see you there. - Well, okay.

- Come on, Suzy. - Sorry, Alex.

- Had a busy day, Alex? - Busy? I shot six scenes today.

- Been at it without a break. - (Suzy) Is it still okay for my test?

Sure, sure. We'll fit that in one day next week.

See you inside, Alex.

OK, I'll just park around the corner.

- Thanks for the drive. - Any time.

- Are those your new earrings? - Aren't you going to wear them?

I've got them in here.

(Dance orchestra plays)

Come on, I'm starving.

Well, I must say they've done the place up nicely.

They certainly have, sir, yes.

- Who's the girl? - Old Bunting's daughter.

I've seen better things washed up on Barry Island.

Well, look who's here!

Well, of all the nerve, after just getting the sack.

Excuse me, Maggie.

Well, here I am.

Sorry to be so long.

Good evening, I... I don't think...

Oh. Yes, this is Miss French. Furnishings.

- Mr and Mrs Bunting. - Good evening, Miss French.

- How do you do, Mr Bunting? - Yes. And, er, this is Miss Bunting.

Well...isn't this nice?

(Audience applauds orchestra)

You didn't tell me you were bringing friends along, Philip.

(Music resumes)

Any chance of getting a drink in this dump?

Ooh, just over here, Alex.

- What's this? - Fruit cup.

Fruit cup! I said drink

- Come on, let's dance. - Hey! Get a load of that.

Well, would you believe it?

A smashing smasher like that, and he's even got manners!

What's the matter with you two? You'd think it was royalty or something.

- Do you think he is? - Stop gawping and come and dance.

No, really, I like being married,

it makes a girl feel there's something solid in her life.

You know, Philip, this is not only the most attractive young lady in the store,

- but the most brilliant. - Go on. You say that to all the girls.

Well, I think it's time we had a dance, Miss Bunting.

Why, I'd love to, Philip.

Oh...yes, well, if you'll excuse us...?

Of course. But mind you don't lose Miss French, Philip.

I don't think that's very likely, sir.

Are you trying to get me the sack?

Surely you can fraternise at a staff party.

Not quite so intimately.

You know, Miss Williams, I think you'd have quite a future in Furnishings.

Really, Mr Preedy?

Would you like me to get you a little transfer from Cosmetics?

Oh, Mr Preedy, would you do that for me?

Delighted.

Only too delighted.

Miss Williams... How about a little drink some evening?

I'd love to.

Oh, naughty!

Well, I've had a terrible day. Terrible.

But surely, Mr Christopher, it's not the first time you've dressed a lady, is it?

Excuse me, I've got to go and see a man about a dummy.

Alex, you haven't noticed my earrings.

How could I not notice? They keep bashing me in the face.

Look...I can't stand the thought of that crummy old fruit juice.

- Let's go some place and get a real drink. - There's a pub around the corner.

We don't need no pub. Trust Alex. I've got a bottle in the car.

Follow me.

(Mrs Blayburn) 'It could be anybody's child, any one of a dozen.

'You think you can blackmail him into marrying you?

'Well, you won't. You hear? You won't!

'Now get out of my house! Get back to the streets where you belong.'

(Mrs Morgan) 'I've had very bad reports of her lately.

'Today she was 15 minutes late back from lunch

'without even so much as offering an explanation.'

(Stanton) 'When it's over, come and see me.

'Just as if nothing had happened.'

(Applause begins)

Hello, there. Had enough, eh?

Philip absolutely exhausts me when he dances.

Yes. I expect you'd like to join your friends now, eh?

Oh, no. This is much more fun.

That's the ticket. You stay with us, little lady.

We could do with a bit of life round 'ere.

Back in a minute, shiny nose.

That's a nice girl, Philip. Have you known her long?

- No. Quite long enough, sir. - Hmm?

Er, would you like some refreshments, Miss Bunting?

I say, Philip, is that the young chap who did that publicity scheme?

What's his name? Er...Randall?

- Yes, sir. - Hmm.

I want to talk to him.

I'll bring him up to your office first thing on Monday morning, sir.

- No, fetch 'im over 'ere now. - Yes, sir.

Bunting wants you.

- He's read it, eh? - He has.

Oh dear.

- (Bunting) Sit down, Randall. - Thank you, sir.

- I want to talk to you about your scheme. - Yes, sir, I thought you might.

I'm a blunt man, I'm given to plain speaking.

It's good.

- It is? - Very good indeed.

Is it?

- Have you read my book? - Your book? Oh, I...

Well, you must, lad. You'll be struck by the similarity of thought.

It's right good stuff.

I could use a good man with brains like you.

Well. Er, thank you, sir.

Ah, there you are, Miss French.

I want you to meet Mr Randall, a very promising young man.

What's he been promising now?

(Laughter)

I've known Miss French for some time, sir.

I believe congratulations are in order for you, too.

Congratulations? What on?

Oh, didn't you know, sir? She and Mr Stanton have just got engaged.

(Train whistle blows)

(Drunken carol singing)

(Singing continues)

- Wait, it's my earring. - Put 'em in your pocket.

(Giggles)

- Ooh, not here, Alex. - You know, baby...

...if you want to get on in pictures, you've gotta grow up.

(Giggles)

That's my baby.

Alex, what's this?

Oh, it's a... It's a cap.

- My chauffeur must've left it. - Ooh!

Alex...

Ladies and gentlemen, take your partners for the last waltz.

Well, I'm certainly not sorry this evening's over.

I'm sorry. I seem to have made a bit of a mess of things.

Bit of a mess?

In the course of a day, young lady, you get me boozing at lunch,

engaged to be married and in utter disgrace with the boss and his entire family!

- Is he really mad with you? - No.

But I don't think they'll regard me as a suitable husband for their daughter.

- I'm glad one good thing's come out of it. - Yes, it was worth it for that alone.

Come along, I'll take you home.

You're very sweet, Philip.

It's quite easy to be sweet to someone you like.

I'll pick you up outside.

- Well, I... - Well?

It's been a wonderful evening. Thank you.

Well, I must say, I thoroughly enjoyed it.

- Different from the usual. - Yes...

I'm afraid I don't know much about these things.

But...er...

...how do I pay you?

Well, normally the fee is paid directly to the escort agency.

- I see. - But in this case...

Well, let's just say this was on the house.

Good night, Alice.

Good night.

I'll be seeing you.

(Sobbing)

Oh!

Oh!

(Crying)

Suzy, what is it? What's happened?

I've lost my earrings.

Never mind, Suzy. We'll get another pair.

We'll get another pair.

Ah, there you are at last.

- Philip, where did you get this car? - Bought it. I always wanted a vintage type.

- Where from? - Garage round the corner.

- When? - This afternoon. Why?

He sold it. He's actually sold it.

What on earth are you talking about?

- Oh, nothing. - Come on, hop in.

Dear old Bessie!

(Trains shunting)

- What, no work tonight? - No, very quiet.

- Can I have a cup of tea, please? - Certainly, Miss. With or without?

Without, please.

That'll cost you thruppence, please, Miss.

Hello, ducks. Got an 'eadache?

Come on, now. A pretty girl like you ought to be a bit more matey.

After all, Christmas spirit and all that.

Don't run away. How about you and me take a little walk?

(Drunkard) Get away, leave me alone!

(Drunken ranting)

(Train passes overhead)

(Tins clatter)

(Gasps)

(Panting heavily)

(Church bells ring)

(Train whistle)

(Coughing and spluttering)

(Sobbing)

And about time, too. Now, look...

Darling, I'm glad you're here. I love you, I love you.

- Er...that's all very nice, but... - Don't you know when not to talk?

Sure you're not mixing me up with somebody else?

- No, darling. - And you're not mad about tonight?

- No, darling. - Well, I am!

Darling, don't spoil anything. Go home.

What do you mean? I've only just got here.

You shouldn't be here at all, you know. See that? "No Men After Ten."

- I'm not after ten, I'm after one! - Makes no difference, out you go.

Wait a minute.

- Will I see you tomorrow? - Tomorrow...

And the next day, and the next, and the next and the next.

You're making it up to me because I've got a better job.

- I'm not. I just found out about Bessie. - Bessie?

Yes, darling, that was a wonderful thing to do.

Look, erm...

Come on outside, I've got a little surprise for you.

Oh, Leslie.

Meet Aggie.

Well, it's...

Oh, you!

Darling.

(Wind howling)

"Yvonne, darling. I've got a job.

"Will you marry me?

"I'll phone you tomorrow.

"All love, Michael."

(Tuts) These girls!

Ah, blimey, these stairs again!

(Assistant) 'Can I help you, madam?'